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John Holmberg
You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.
Brady
All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week downtown at Standup Live. Justin Willman and Nick Murphy will entertain you in Tempe at the Improv. You have comedy vet Flip Orly doing his thing, and then he'll also be performing at the Desert Ridge Improv on the north end of town along with up and coming comedian Amir K. For the complete lineups and for take tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com come.
Brett
On down to the Ranch House Grill.
Toledo
Comfort food is your next meal.
Brett
Pork chili verde, chicken fried steak. Ranch House knows you'll think it's great.
Amir K
Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House Grill has been voted best breakfast four years in a row. We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions. Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven days a week, 6am to 2pm We're a family restaurant with a small town atmosphere serving southwestern comfort food for 18 years. Come on down to the Ranch House Grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix at 56th street and Thomas Road.
Brett
Hey, it's Larry McFeely with Wayne from Amco.
Larry McFeely
And Wayne, now that it's getting hot out, I turned on the AC in.
Brett
My car and I'm not so sure that it's cool. Uh, oh, well, the air's blowing kind.
Larry McFeely
Of cool, but it sort of smells a little bit funky.
Wayne
Larry, your car's AC system should be checked and serviced every year. Plus, replacing the cabin air filter helps the air blow strong and takes away any nasty smells. You know, it takes about an hour and in most cases, we can do it while you wait. We also have an online coupon for 25 bucks off.
Larry McFeely
Ooh, that's awesome.
Brett
I'll say.
Wayne
We're Amco.
Brett
Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco Double A MCO transmissions and a whole lot more. You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you? P.T. good morning, everybody. Hello. Welcome to Thursday. It's 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady Brett, Big Dick Toledo. There's the morning sickness. Let's get it going, shall we? It's a big day. It's a big day, boys. And it's a big day. That's very weird. And it's annually a big day. And it's always strange because there's an excitement in the air.
Larry McFeely
I can't believe you're doing this.
Brett
It's here.
Larry McFeely
Really cool.
Brett
You think it's neat? Yeah. It's Kirby's birthday. I know, I know. That's really nice. That's a big day. Wow. Okay, I'm going to turn it as one year closer to 18. All right, are we ready? Moving on. Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't interrupt with your nonsense. I will turn it on you. I will make it very uncomfortable very quickly. No, it's. This is the thing where everybody gets super excited. Everybody's like, it's happening. It's happening, it's happening. And then nobody watches it. It's the hall of Fame game. We're all excited. Football's back. But we won't watch. We won't watch that.
John Holmberg
It's on in the background.
Brett
We will not watch it. Like, we'll peek. Well, it's back, baby. This is it. We're here. And nobody's gonna watch any of it. It will just. It will just fade into the. Exactly. Into the background. If it's even on in the background. We'll check, but it's new plays. It's. The uniforms are going to get dirty for the first time. For real. We're not looking at last year's highlights. We're not looking at practice. We're not looking at camp. We're actually. The countdown is official. Every year that we have preseason football, you know, the snaps happen live in front of us. Live football with professional football teams will be happening tonight, and it's exciting, and no one's going to watch.
Larry McFeely
I cringe on the game a little bit for the teams that have to play.
Brett
No, it's just seems so early.
Larry McFeely
I'm like, oh, my gosh.
Brett
Early. B. It's that terrible field, that Tom Benson field or whatever. That thing is a notoriously awful place. But, you know, then you get the thing in Canton this weekend. But it's happening. It is. It's the buzz in the air that yesterday we had band practice for. For my belated birthday show, which will be at the Rooster on August 9th. If you're interested in going to that thing just for fun, we're gonna. It's a drunken nightmare. We gotta make it an annual tradition. And we were talking, and Marty just said in the middle, he goes, football season's right around the corner. Boys. And we're like, yeah, it is. It's. It's tomorrow. It's official that the 2025 season has its first official snap tonight. And I'm waiting and I'm ready and I'm happy and I don't even know who's playing. I know the Chargers are in it. Lions, Lions, Lions in charge. That's it. And I don't care.
John Holmberg
I. I just looked it up myself. It's not like I knew that off.
Brett
The top of my head. No, no, no. It's not something I have known. I've not known. I've cared. I've not cared.
Larry McFeely
Didn't even know.
Brett
I know it's happening. Well, now you literally just looked it up and the blaze of excitement is alive. And enjoy none of it. You won't. You'll probably just end up watching Happy Gilmore, too. And I know. Well, trust me, you know, if you want to feel like a smart, Hemingway type, you know, capable person, then go ahead and watch Happy Gilmore, too, because it might be the laziest movie ever. It's just flat stupid. There isn't a single joke. And I'm going to go off again. Don't do this. Not one joke written down for that moon at one time. The only jokes are fist fights and just a. Oh, that's funny. Yeah, it's hilarious and slapstick nonsense. There's not one, like, written clever joke in the entire thing.
Larry McFeely
Again, I. I told you, I said probably the most. The. If anything was clever, the closest thing would be Zach the player the golfer matches from the. Yes.
Brett
Wills Alatoris. Yeah, I don't think they looked alike at all, because I actually looked.
Larry McFeely
It's a little bit of a stretch, but it was. It was kind of a funny.
Brett
But you'd have to know, like in the movie, when only a golfer would. Well, I don't even know who you're talking about. Right. And Happy Gilmore. Happy chokes his weird blonde caddy that looks a little like a munchkin, this crazy blonde hair. And then later, a real professional golfer is in and. And that caddy, Happy recognizes him and says, oh, you want to. You want to be my caddy today, like in the old days? And he goes, I'm actually playing. They made real PGA golfer Will Zalotoris the grown version of that kid. And it doesn't matter because for me.
John Holmberg
I would never have.
Brett
Of course.
Larry McFeely
What is that?
Brett
Who's Will's Alatoris? Right? And it isn't it so dumb. It's so dumb. And it is going to just. It's just slaughtering numbers, and it makes me just sit back and go, okay, my finger's not on the pulse of anything anymore. Nobody cares about.
Larry McFeely
Worth ticked up.
Brett
Yeah. Oh, nobody cares. Nobody cares at all about, like, the quality of anything. They're just. They're there for the nostalgia berries and they're. And the member berries and all that. And that's why we're getting Focker in law. And we deserve it as a society. Stop. We deserve it. Painful and as disappointed as I am in society, I'm still happy that the NFL has real live football tonight. And also, I have to say, and I don't say this too often to society. I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you. And that puts me in there. So I'm proud of us. American Eagle Stock went up 10 and a half percent in a day after the Sydney Sweeney controversy. So to American Eagle, to Sydney Sweeney, and to all of us.
Larry McFeely
Even the President chimed in on it.
Brett
It's because it's the dumbest thing of all time.
John Holmberg
It's only greenwood going for.
Brett
You know What? You are 100% right. That America still has its. It's. It's bearing straight every once in a while. When it comes to God, I gotta find the damn song. Damn it. It's. The bearings have to be straight sometimes when. Where is it? No. No. Fred. Help.
John Holmberg
I'll find it.
Brett
I got. There he is. There you are. Gone. We're officially almost. We've almost killed Woke all the way around almost. There were. There is a group of such unfun human beings out there. A pretty blonde girl with huge cans and an okay face. Nothing special, but good. Like Tom Brady's wife. He always looked at him. Wow. Wait a minute. Same thing we do with Sydney sm. Like, holy Christ. Wait a minute. But she's. She's. She's built up. They made it Nazism. The. The.
Frank Caliendo
The.
Brett
The woke crazies that still are out there floating around like. We didn't get all the roaches screaming out that that's eugenics and white supremacy. To say that Sydney Sweeney has good genes in a double meaning. Taking the word, you know, genes and making it both meanings. And they were trying to cancel it. 90% of people surveyed said, Great ad. American Eagle stuck through the roof. And God damn it all, I'm proud of you. I'm proud of you. Nobody said, oh, let's be afraid. We're not on eggshells like we used to be. Meanwhile, somebody made a great point last night. You Actually have real Naz on college campuses screaming out, kill the Jews. Palestine's right. Get rid of the Jews. And no, none of the woke people are there. They're on their side. They're the ones saying, well, now these Palestinians have a point. Meanwhile, Sydney Sweeney. That's Nazism to you. What happened? And who are they?
Larry McFeely
And if a descendant from the Third Reich is that American eagle, I tell you what, we got completely duped.
Brett
This is a rare phrase for me. I don't know that I've ever said it, and it could get me in a little heat. But again, I'm at a point where I just don't care if Sydney Sweeney represents Nazis. Hitler was right. That's a good one. If that's what he was standing up for.
Larry McFeely
That's what they created.
Brett
If that's what his. Okay, let's hear the man out. Well, he has some good points. He's built one. He's building those.
Larry McFeely
That's Von Avamilia, I think.
Brett
Yeah. I think even the Jews are like, back off of us. But this other thing you got going. I don't like to scream the phrase Hitler was right. It gets you in a lot of trouble. But if that's. I mean, in argument to what those people are saying is an American eagle Nazi ad, I'm gonna say pump the brakes a second. This is what the Nazis wanted to build. All right, let's piecemeal their plan out and take the good parts. We'll throw away all the garbage because there's a lot of it. We'll keep the jet engines, the Volkswagens, the Hugo Boss suits, and the Sydney Sweeneys. Yeah, the other stuff's no good. But don't start making me think, wait a minute. The Nazis are onto something. Because that's what you do every time you say. When you. When you paint with a broad brush of Nazism, everything's a Nazi.
John Holmberg
Oh, Hugo Boss, Volkswagens.
Brett
Sydney swing. Jet air.
John Holmberg
The Jed at batting.400. That's not bad.
Brett
I mean. I mean, if you're out of 10, I mean, automatically going straight to 10 on the easy math, and I'm with you. You could find six other things. You're like, those are. No.
John Holmberg
Yeah, that's what I'm saying.
Brett
Yeah, okay. All right, I'm with you on that. But don't start saying. Don't start making people like Brett, go. Hold on a second. These guys were hitting.400. You hear what you've done? This is what your Nazi crap does. Focus in on what the real Nazi stuff is. Which is over there at Columbia that these. These nut bags were all in favor of, which was protesting Jewish students. That should have been where their focus was. Not on Sydney Sweeney's amazing. Her face. What's going on? It's. It's. It's okay. I mean, you look at her initially. Bam. Look at those. And she knows it.
Frank Caliendo
John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's Morning Sickness.
Brett
Every time you look at her, she's got those out, and they're amazing. Look at that faith. That's a good picture of her. Yeah, but I mean, why? Those cans are insane. But I'm proud of America. We went out and bought American Eagle stock.
John Holmberg
That's America.
Brett
That's what America does. Like, that's. That's a stock I can get behind.
Larry McFeely
Watch this pop.
Brett
Yeah, and it did 10% jump in stocks. That's. That's not small. That's a nice bounce.
John Holmberg
Oh, and how many people is that pissing off right now?
Brett
But who are they? Who are you, you pigs that can't look at a pretty woman saying, I'm pretty. That's one thing people hate. People hate when successful. People say, I'm good. It only works in boxing and MMA and stuff like that. Those guys have to always say, I'm king of the world.
Larry McFeely
They're the antagonist.
Brett
I'm the greatest of all time. Yeah, they're always kind of the bad guy, But I'm the greatest ever. I've done. You hear that in football? I'm the best that's ever done it. No, the guy's an attitude problem and everything else. Pretty women saying they're pretty out loud. I'm very pretty. It's like, nah, we don't. We're the ones who tell you that. And the majority of the time, that's very true. But in an ad campaign where she doesn't say, I'm pretty, it's just assumed. And then she says the thing about blue eyes, blue jeans, I got good jeans. She may be saying she's pretty out loud at the same time, she's saying, I have nice jeans on, so it's veiled. She's seducing us without being a clever ad. It's a clever ad. She's seducing us without being obvious. I know I'm pretty. I know you like what you see, but she's not saying it. Yep. Like what JLO does, which is turn around and go, my ass looks good. Cause I'm 55, and it still looks like. All right, calm down. We're the ones that'll tell you, here's a picture of my ass. You can't do it yourself. Now if someone else takes a picture of JLo's ass and says, J. Lo's got good jeans and she's pulling jeans up like, good commercial, she can't do it herself. Can't. Can't DIY your own compliments.
Larry McFeely
And looking into it, we probably will find out it was the ad agency that did not get the business from American Eagle.
Brett
Yeah, I was.
Larry McFeely
We didn't come up with that idea.
Brett
Actually said that to Frank Caliendo yesterday. I'm like, I bet you it's people who didn't get the campaign.
Larry McFeely
That's basically what happened, in a way, to Papa John. Back in the day. It was an ad agency that.
Brett
Oh, well, yeah.
Larry McFeely
And they leveraged it.
Brett
They had the N bomb sitting in the thing, and they said they were uncomfortable. Whether they. I don't know. I don't know if they actually got the campaign or didn't. And it was just a jealousy move. But, you know, he got hit with the N word. You just, you can't win that fight, no matter what. But damn it all, again, I'm proud of America. Proud of you guys. You got her done and you made it so we could all be happy saying, oh, you know what? We can look at a beautiful woman, no matter what color she is, and have her give us a wink and a nod and a clever line, and it melts us. And we're all like, you know what? Pretty good deal. And we go out and buy stock and jeans and all sorts of stuff and the numbers go up.
John Holmberg
Think about the angry Brazapaustinos yesterday.
Brett
Just, where are they? Where are these? Where are the women? Where are the people?
Larry McFeely
They don't exist.
Brett
I don't think they do either. I have to wonder, do they? Are they real? I think they are real because then they have these marches and stuff.
Larry McFeely
It only takes a few.
Brett
So. But evidently they. They've got a pipeline to getting their message out. And I think it's because it's so absurd. But again, look what you did. He made Brett hear me say Hitler might have been right. And then he. And then he does it. And then he goes into the. The analytics of it and gives me some, oh, his win rate wasn't terrible. And he had to, you know, war replacement and all these things. The numbers that he comes out, he's batting.400.
John Holmberg
I was the play by play guy.
Brett
You were the color guy over there. He was batting 400. Thank you for that, Brett. I appreciate you not just saying, nice job, America. Proud of you. Got football starting tonight. We batted down those trying to throw Nazism at hot girls. That's your move, pigs. That's your move. Because we stopped having body positivity be normal. And we all started to recognize that being £300 Lena Dunham is unhealthy. Have you watched any of that Lena Dunham show? I hate watch more than I watch normal.
Larry McFeely
I have.
Brett
She's got a new TV show. It's called Too Much and it's about. It certainly is.
Larry McFeely
Even if I saw that, why would I now, Now I gotta tell you.
Brett
Right now, because it's about. It's a dreamscape for fat ladies. Like a big girl goes to London, it's so hard to watch because, like she's. She's charming enough, but every guy, like there's dudes fighting over her like it's a fat girl's fever dream of what she wants the world to really be.
John Holmberg
Sounds like fantasy.
Brett
Emily Ratajkowski's in at the beginning and all she does is just. Just attack her with everything she doesn't want was just bullying and mean words. Look here, shorty shorts, look here, tight butt and stuff like that. She just makes fun of the girl who's in great shape because her husband, boyfriend left her for Emily and rightfully so, she'd let herself go. And so she attacks, like verbally assaults her a couple of times and then leaves and never wants anybody to call her names. And then meets like any. Everywhere she goes, dudes are trying to bang her. And it's so unbelievable. It's like, it's like it never would never happen. Like very attractive men too.
John Holmberg
Sounds like his fantasy is Game of Thrones.
Brett
Exactly. Game of Thrones was more realistic. At least the dogs were just bigger than normal, you know, dire. I could see those. We could probably make one of those. Yeah, and we did Handsome dude. Yeah, and then we did. We went out and made a couple of them. So. But handsome dudes loving on giants, the second they meet them, that's. You got a lot more work to do. I would believe it if it took like more than an hour. She lands in London at noon and goes to a club. And that night has a guy back in her apartment and he's a singer in a band in a bar. And he's a good looking man.
Larry McFeely
Scored.
Brett
He follows her around and then. And then he's like, I'm kind of seeing somebody. So she goes, she kicks him out. And he comes back. He can't. He met her 18 minutes ago. He was gonna kill a chunk at a bar. And then something about him. She's just perfect for me. And she's gonna have dudes fighting over. And I'm like, oh, this isn't realistic in any way, shape, or form. But anyway, I hate watch everything. I like hate watching more than I watch watching. It's more fun. But, America, I'm proud of you. Nice job. Football starts in 11 hours, and I'm. Come on, it's a great day. I won't watch any of it. I'll. I'll know what time. I'm not gonna watch the thing.
Larry McFeely
Just knowing that it's.
Brett
I just know that we're there warms the heart. We're there now. We're within a month of, like, ramping up for the real thing, where Sundays are back. I just. I got a text yesterday from Anthony over at Eric's barbecue. Am I. Am I cooking week one this week? Oh, yes. Oh. Oh, yes, you are. The Steeler Adventure begins week one. And, yes, Eric's family barbecue is going to be catering Steeler Day when the Steelers kick off the season against the Jets. So it's just that taste. It's. You know what? It's. It's when you hit. It reminds me of, like, being in school, and you hit the Tuesday before Thanksgiving break. Thanksgiving break is the tease to what's next.
Larry McFeely
Yeah, the week before.
Brett
The week before.
Larry McFeely
Four or five days.
Brett
A couple of days. But Thanksgiving break is the tease to what's coming, which is two more weeks, and we're off for a couple of weeks, and we got Christmas, and in those two weeks, we get presents and, like, stuff goes on, and it's just that. Here we go. We're in the season. It has begun. Thanksgiving is the preseason to the holiday season.
Larry McFeely
Now it feels like it starts.
Brett
Feels so good.
Larry McFeely
Like Halloween.
Brett
Well, Halloween has its own vibe, and it gives you the idea that, yeah, you're coming into it, but Thanksgiving's the one where, like, here we are. We're. It is official. We are coasting into the awesomeness that is the season. And football's got the same thing. God damn it. I love every second of this. Chargers, Lions, evidently. I don't know who's playing. Like, I don't know the players. I don't know.
Larry McFeely
He's not allowed on the field.
Brett
Is that. You're still mad? You're still mad?
Larry McFeely
No, he's. He's. He's cleared.
Brett
He's cleared of Nothing. He's. He's a professional coach now. There's. Has no bearing on his Michigan days that. Was he undefeated against you guys the second time through or he lost once and won three or four. I don't think he.
Larry McFeely
No, His. His record wasn't.
Brett
Are you sure? On his second on this, I had like.
Larry McFeely
I think he almost went nine years.
Brett
Okay.
Larry McFeely
He was like, either way, three and eight.
Brett
Got himself a natty. Bounced you guys around a little bit. Never once. I'll give him a little bit. There's no doubt that if anybody knew about the rapes that were going on at Ohio State, it had to be people at Michigan. And they kept it quiet. So in a little. In a weird little way, if I was a Michigan guy and I'd found one student tell me that there was rapes going on in Ohio State, I'd have been blabbing like crazy. So Michigan kept it quiet. Watch the documentary. It's impossible to not want to. Yeah. Yeah. We're not supporting Sydney Sweeney's jeans and cans. And Ohio State's going to be celebrated in a couple of weeks. Their football team's going to get trophies and flags. And after that documentary comes out, nobody's going to sit back and go, let's take a break from cheering for the Scarlet Gray for a minute. Let's sort this out first.
Larry McFeely
3 and 5 was his right.
Brett
It was 3 and 5 against tomorrow. He came in with an ugly team.
Frank Caliendo
And then John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness.
John Holmberg
I don't know if you can read that.
Brett
I can't. What's it say?
John Holmberg
Damn it. I don't know if it's fake or not. It's.
Brett
Is it from American Eagle? It's.
John Holmberg
It's an ad. It has their letterhead and everything. It's probably fake, but. We sincerely apologize for featuring Sydney Sweeney in our recent advertisement. In hindsight, we underestimated the combined impact of her blue eyes, blonde hair, and general hotness. Also, we did not realize how big her boobs would be. Our marketing team has been sent to Denim sensitivity training. Thank you for your feedback. Please stop emailing us. We're still trying to recover from the group chat fallout.
Brett
I was forced to sign a bogus paper that said I went to sensitivity. Really? Yeah.
John Holmberg
No.
Brett
Companies always say, all right, just, here's this fake paper. We're going to lay in front of somebody and say you went to sensitivity training. I have never once. I don't even know what sensitivity. What it is. But I have been. My company has lied to several other companies.
Larry McFeely
Maybe the fact that they ask, you know, that they're being sensitive about it.
Brett
I don't know. But if you've ever gotten a letter from us that said, I went to sensitivity training, it's a flat out lie. It's a cya. I have no idea why they would do that, but whatever.
Frank Caliendo
My back.
Brett
I don't have yours. So it works for me to tell you that that's the case. I'm fine with that. John signed this. I'm like, really? What is. Where is our sensitivity training center? Just sign it like, okay.
Larry McFeely
It's really nice.
Brett
I hear it's amazing. I've never ever been. Don't know what it is. We've sat through those videos that say, don't grab women's asses at work.
John Holmberg
Yeah, I forgot about those.
Brett
But that was when you first start.
Larry McFeely
And what is.
Brett
Someday management will get in trouble.
Larry McFeely
HR training.
Brett
No, no, I've never had that. I never done that. In fact, the only thing about the HR room in this, this whole office is Susie's made some crass jokes to me that I'm like, jesus, somebody should go to hr. She's hilarious. Yeah, I've never once. I don't even know what that is.
John Holmberg
Yeah, I'm on over here.
Brett
I do. Have you ever had to. You've never.
John Holmberg
Sensitivity training me, please.
Brett
Oh, yeah, it's true. You. Who am I talking to? Captain Sensitive over. In fact, I wouldn't be surprised. You're like, hi, I'm here for the sensitivity training. And hey, have a seat. I'm Brett Vesley. I'm your teacher. Like, wow, that is a. That is a twist. I didn't expect you were in charge of sensitivity training. Oh, I got this. Sit the down. You get five.
John Holmberg
Yeah, this brought in there complaining about.
Brett
Wow, this is nice. David, when the first week of football finally arrives and the first game starts, it feels like if Sydney Sweeney came up to you and unleashed her breasts for you to fondle and play with. That is true. It's like seeing boobs again. Like, I haven't seen boobs for a while. Very true. Yeah. That sensitivity training thing, I don't know. And is anyone.
Larry McFeely
I mean, it was really. You'd hear it a lot on the court cases and stuff that we're going to settle and they're going to send.
Brett
You the sensitivity training. I've never met a sensitivity trainer. I've never. I don't know what that is, but it's. I. I've actually signed papers lying to companies that say. You didn't like what John did here? He went to sensitivity training. No, I didn't. Never been. Don't even know where it is. Don't know who to talk to. Don't know who. Who in the world I would do you. Who in the building? I don't know.
Larry McFeely
But I. You know, I'd like to talk to someone that went to it.
Brett
Me too.
Larry McFeely
Did it ever come out, like, oh, my gosh.
Brett
So much more sensitive. So much. I, like, come out and hug you. Like, I mean, like, God, I'm so sorry. I'm such a. Here's some flowers. I bought you some flowers. How are you feeling? Are you doing good? I'm gonna take the trash out now. Geez. Sensitivity training worked. Yeah, I just. It's a. It's a strange thing to me because it's. It's like a common lie across the board when somebody's mad that your company says they're gonna send an employee to sensitivity training. And I don't think there is any such thing.
Larry McFeely
Is that the new term for timeout?
Brett
Yeah.
Larry McFeely
Sit in the court, put your nose in the corner over there for an hour.
Brett
I was nuts. I have never been detention. I don't know what it is. I don't know what it is. No clue. But it's a good out. People buy it because I think they all assume that it exists in every. Like, if one company tells another. We sent Brady to sensitivity training. We're sorry. He called your company a bunch of fat Nazis. And they're like, yeah, that's right. He should go to that. And then that company's like, do we have sensitivity training? They do. Yeah, they do. We all have it. We do.
Larry McFeely
Part of a company's growth. Where you get the fact that now you have a binder on how the company's run.
Brett
I suppose.
Larry McFeely
H.R.
Brett
You got me. I think it's all. I think the. The most recent months, my eyes have been open to so much ridiculous. And that's the biggest one. It's like, wow, that's. Where is this sensitivity? I'll go to it. I have no problem. But I've actually put my name on. I fraudulently sign. That's me. That's fraud on my part that I said I went sensitivity training. Sign here.
Larry McFeely
You didn't think at any particular time that there was a. There was a training?
Brett
Yeah. I mean, in my mind, I think to myself, it must exist. People seem to be like, nobody ever. It's the Brady of things like Nobody ever questions where it is. Who's there? Who's the teacher? It's not a thing.
John Holmberg
It's Paul, Sarah.
Brett
Oh, my God. Yeah, Paul.
Larry McFeely
Yesterday.
Brett
Yeah.
Larry McFeely
You know when you talk about people not following the news or something, you're like, how. How could they not? Yesterday I was the one that told him that Hulk Hogan died. He didn't know Hulk Hogan died and.
Brett
He didn't know Theo died?
Larry McFeely
No.
John Holmberg
Well, I mean, I'm sure.
Brett
No way. Wait a second. He's got it.
John Holmberg
He's more of a Hogan.
Brett
Well, he's. He's on Hogan's team more. Yeah, Paul is definitely leaning towards the wrestling world than the Cosby's. Are you kidding me?
Larry McFeely
No.
Brett
Is Paul okay?
Larry McFeely
No, he just. Like. I hadn't been following anything the last.
Brett
No, but the follow up on that is Paul. Are you okay? Because that, to me, says he's writing his manifesto and he's so busy on.
Larry McFeely
It because we were watching. He was streaming the. The Aussie funeral and he was checking that out. I go, that's pretty wild.
Brett
And then, you know, all the people dying. What? Okay, this tells me Paul is in a dark room with a typewriter with no R firing off the letter that we're all going to read after the incident. This is it. These are the moments you need to pay more attention to. What have you been doing? You've got a phone. You're aware of the Ozzy funeral live stream. You didn't once notice any of the other stuff.
John Holmberg
And he's on social media, so I know something's wrong here.
Brett
Time for a sweep of Paul's house. He's the one. He's what? He's on that. He's in the top three. And he's all. He's. He text us already this morning, which means he's up early. Something's on his mind, what he's working on. All right. I don't like that he's in our top three of guys. He's already told me that if he does this is when. You know, if I ever lose it in this building, I'll spare you. Okay, thanks. And I laugh because I'm like, I'm fine with that. So long as I'm off the hook. How about that? Yeah, the manifesto's being typed out. That's a dead giveaway to me.
John Holmberg
I'm going to collect water.
Brett
Yeah, go collect water and don't come back. This guy says, sydney Sweeney in that American Eagle ad got more curves than a desert highway. And it's funny how the Ones that are crying about are all the girls built like the before pictures in the squat challenge. Let's be real. It's never the dudes or the dimes hating. Boy. That's a fact. It's always the ones whose jeans scream for mercy before they hit the mid thigh. Daniel. That's Welsh. That's philosophy from Daniel Vallis. Nice job. It's never the dudes or the dimes. It's not. That should be a shirt. It ain't the dudes and the dimes. I don't know who's bitching, but it ain't us. The dudes in the dimes are hanging out together just like. Look, we might not have a chance with you dimes, but we definitely agree with most of what you say. Just in case Lena Dunham starts telling you her problems. Your ears go no more. Sydney Sweeney starts bitching about stuff, and all of a sudden you want to fix it. I want to be. I want to help you. What about my problem? Shut up. Lena. Hit the treadmill. Sydney's got a hangnail. We gotta fix this. It's your problem.
John Holmberg
You oughta ho hos or what?
Brett
Just to happen. Just happy today. A, I didn't go to sensitivity training. B, football tonight. No. I just. That's something that we need to explore. Sensitivity training. All companies need to stop saying that to each other because we all deep down think it's a thing. And I don't. I don't believe it is. Now that we're out loud talking about it. I don't believe it actually exists in any corporate.
Larry McFeely
Oh, it does?
Brett
Where? Who have you ever known? It's okay. But. Right.
Larry McFeely
It's video training.
Brett
It's a video you have to watch.
Larry McFeely
I think on the companies. Most of that. That Unless you. And then maybe you have to sit down with a counselor.
Brett
Who's that? This company's not hiring a therapist to come talk to me for an hour. They know for. They know better than to put me in a room with the. With a counselor for sensitivity training because it's going right on the air the next day. They know that.
Larry McFeely
I think they would lay out a bunch of different textures and like, you touch them for the sensitivity part of it. That's corduroy.
Brett
I like that. Okay, that's. That's silk. He's very sensitive. What's rubbing on your arm? That's a feather. How about now? That's sandpaper. Great work. You're doing very well in sensitivity training.
Larry McFeely
And the last one. That's ky. Yes, it is.
Brett
Isn't sensitivity training kind of like hot ones? You just go until it hurts and see which ones you're sensitive to.
Frank Caliendo
John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98K U PD. Holmberg's morning sickness.
Brett
Do I watch Old Yeller? Because that'll get me. I'll come out of sensitivity training crying like, oh, my God, they made him shoot his dog at the end. I don't think it's a thing. Never, ever, ever, ever have I met someone who says I'm a sensitivity trainer.
Larry McFeely
Maybe it's in our manual in the company that if it happens, here's where, you know, here's the package.
John Holmberg
I don't even have a manual.
Brett
Yeah, where's the manual? What manual are you talking about? I didn't get a manual. Did you? Did you get a manual?
Larry McFeely
No, we don't get copies of it.
Brett
Look, it's. Right now. We don't work here anyway. It's like just there in the corner, act like they're not here and just collect the money. Where's the manual? Where's the sensitivity training? Where's any of it?
Larry McFeely
Susie probably would have all that info.
Brett
How come she didn't just hand it to me? For the sake of it if they need me, like the times that they've, like, you're going to sensitivity training. All right, I know. Okay. You bet. It hasn't happened a lot, but it has happened.
Larry McFeely
Yeah. Oh, yeah.
Brett
You got me. Maybe I should. And is that what they want? Like me coming out of a sensitivity thing going, man, I gotta change everything. And then it would be like, you know, the stupidest radio show in the history of man. We sent him to sensitivity training. And now the new John show begins. Good morning, Phoenix. How are you?
Larry McFeely
John's got a white beard.
Brett
I hope you're well. Thank you, Brady, for noticing. I care about you. You're a wonderful man. And you're a quality father. Not gonna say the rat, the rest of them. Brett, you look spry today.
John Holmberg
Why, thank you.
Brett
Your birthday's coming up.
John Holmberg
It is?
Brett
You don't look a day over 40.
John Holmberg
Oh, thank you.
Brett
And I hate to bring your age into it, Richard. Happy Father's Day. See, there's still some problems.
Toledo
Very sensitive.
Brett
I cried really hard last night at the Bachelor when they let that girl go without a rose. I thought she was a wonderful human being who deserved more respect at 6:16. I've been to sensitivity training.
Larry McFeely
Let's give something away.
Brett
We should give it all away, Brady. Why would anyone have to fight for anything? The world should Be yours. In fact, today at 10 o', clock after I leave, the doors are open. Anything inside this building is yours. Phoenix. I don't want you to have to work too hard to get anything. We've got so much. Why don't we share it?
Toledo
God, is that the goal?
John Holmberg
You have a wonderful idea every day.
Brett
I guess I don't know what they would send me that for. Well, but there I was.
Toledo
We all had sensitivity training when we. When we opened this building.
Brett
Is that it took us over. Yeah, yeah.
Toledo
We had to go to that hotel.
Brett
Yeah. That was cover your ass training for.
Toledo
It was sexual harassment. And it was everything else with those cheesy 80s videos.
Brett
Yeah, they were hilarious. Yeah, man.
John Holmberg
I walked in and Paul walked in.
Brett
I'm like, what are you doing? Yeah, that was awesome. That was when the company first bought us and they made us sit in that hotel at Doubletree downtown. And we all went in in groups. Yeah. And watched old movies.
Toledo
Have a time.
Brett
We watch movies like President Reagan says, I'm not supposed to stay. But you got nice, lady.
Frank Caliendo
This is frowned upon.
Brett
In 19 the film strip broke.
Larry McFeely
There it is.
Brett
Today's workplace has three trovos.
Toledo
How did Robert exhibit poor behavior?
Brett
Smell my fingers, bitch. I don't know that that guy should be out in public at all, let alone have a job. How did he get through the interview?
Larry McFeely
Who's coming in that hot?
Toledo
He's your one day J. Yeah.
Brett
Here's what he should have said. Move. I need the copier. It's a little pushy, but if that's better than it was before. Whoa, whoa. Look at the turd cutter on the new girl. Robert needs work.
Toledo
What did Jay say doing during his introduction?
Larry McFeely
Yeah, nice.
Brett
One day Jay walked. Best story in the history of my career in life. Hired a guy. Memo went out before he got there. We have got the biggest, best sales guy in all of the world. He is going to come in here and revolutionize this sales team. He is going to kill it for us. He's exciting, he's amazing. He's the best in the business. Let's welcome our friend Jay. Walking him through the building. Next day, strutting around, walks up to a lady named Kirsten, I believe. Kirsten, Kirsten. Whoa. You got nice. Hour later Memo comes out. Jay will no longer be working for the broadcast.
Larry McFeely
They screwed up.
Toledo
They didn't send him to sensitive.
Brett
He was there for 35 minutes. Told somebody she had nice. And then the better part was Colin, my friend almost got in trouble for framing each memo side by side. Of this amazing guy. And he's not working here anymore with the dates on the top. April 12, April 13. Amazing guy. The best. The interview process by far outshined. Everybody was the best and the best and the best. He will no longer be working.
Larry McFeely
Should have known when they were ranting and raving. This guy's coming. And he's coming from Alaska.
Brett
That's why he's got. He's got no social skills.
Larry McFeely
It was a little rough over in Alaska. And finally opens the door.
Brett
She was a. She was a statuesque woman. She. She showed up.
John Holmberg
I was gonna say was Jay.
Brett
Right. Jay wasn't. Okay. All right. Jay said what we were all thinking. Okay. All right. And we should have kept him on board. He was a real go getter. Yeah. Coming from Alaska. He hadn't seen a lady that didn't look like a bear for like 10 years. Oh, they're building them different down here. You got great. Where's my desk?
Toledo
Gonna find his LinkedIn profile now. See what he's.
Brett
Oh, I'm sure it's radio. I'm sure he's the vice president.
Larry McFeely
Oh, he's fine.
Brett
Something.
Larry McFeely
Yeah.
Brett
Hey. Screw up in radio, you just end up with the word vice president next to your name. What did you do? I told the lady she had nice. Did she? Yeah. Well, then you're the new vice president. Nice job. Well done. Gotta go get her. You're a good guy. Sensitivity training. Eat my d. That's not very sensitive. I know. That's the fun part of it all. I never thought of it. It's always just been an out. Just telling me when. Sensitivity training. I've been told that to other people. We had to send them sensitivity training. Used to be a joke here. When we take a day off. Yeah. We got to go to sensitivity training. Everybody believed it. Why'd you go to sensitivity training for, like, all these things. I'm like, have you ever been. Oh, no. We've got it though. Do you?
Toledo
Or is it just.
Brett
It's this looming kind of falseness. It's almost like. God. Are you sure?
Larry McFeely
The video package. Yeah.
Brett
At least hand me the DVD or send me an email.
Toledo
Or is it like a Blockbuster? You just go rent that package and just show it to your employees.
Brett
You show that you rented it. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know.
John Holmberg
I remember taking a day off and we said it was sensitivity training and ran into somebody at a bar. And they're like, we're supposed to be insensitive. Do the shot right now, pal.
Toledo
Exactly.
Brett
It's this great myth. It's just dawning on me now that everyone believes it's a real thing and not one company knows or has it.
Toledo
Like Brady said, it's a timeout. Think about what you've done.
Brett
I suppose there I was having thought scrolling my name on a thing that said I went to make somebody happy. Just make these people go away. Like, okay, what am I doing? I didn't do anything. I had nothing to do with any of it. They were talking. They were talking for me. Like here. We told them. We told them all this. We told them a whole bunch of lies. Sign it.
Toledo
That's what I mean. It's your fault for perpetuating the myth.
Brett
I agree. I wasn't sure I didn't have to go.
Toledo
You didn't. Maybe you still.
Brett
Maybe I. Maybe, yeah. Maybe it's in September. Maybe I can remain completely insensitive until September.
Toledo
That's the one month they could schedule the guy to come in.
Brett
Got me. You're a dick. You know it, right? Yeah, kind of sometimes. All right. So long as you're aware of it. That's pretty much all it was.
Toledo
What if it's a Gruden type guy.
Larry McFeely
That comes in and leads the session?
Brett
Tell you what, man, three things. Three things you need to worry about right there, man. I like this, man. Let's give it to him, man. What's that thing he's saying? Stanford things and he's screaming songs now. Tell you what, man, you weren't wrong about that guy's lips. Neither was I, man. I don't know. Anyway, if you have to go. If you. If you've been. I'm. Yeah, this is a good idea. This is a sensitivity train band name can come out of this. Falsified Corporate Wokeness. That's a great band name. It's a little bit title maybe I don't like it as a band name for like one of those indie.
Larry McFeely
Yeah, it kind of. It's hipster.
Brett
It's a hipster indie band, but I like it. Falsified Corporate Wokeness is pretty solid. I like that one a lot. But I don't think they have like it's real. Yeah.
Toledo
Nobody's emailed in that. That they've taken it?
Brett
No, not one. I'm looking right now. Not one. Some guy says maybe. I don't know how you guys do this. You must have auto pinned it. Your sensitivity training. Like God, you brought Biden into the party. How do you guys do that? Email? You're so tribal. And somehow became Democrat, Republican. I Don't know.
Larry McFeely
Yeah, there's the corporate version. But then when they settle, like in a legally. What does that training, you know, is it a 30 day seminar?
Toledo
Court paperwork, man.
Brett
I don't know. How long does it last and when do. And what did you have to pass a test to say you're Now. It doesn't make sense. I've never put my brain around it. But there's no possible way it works.
Larry McFeely
Because some of that training that we've had, there is a little test at the end.
Brett
Yeah. Well, that's all because. And it's all for corporate people to show you a silly video and say if you hiccup again, cya. Yeah. You're gonna get. We can fire you for anything.
Toledo
Well, you get a ticket. There's a number of places that you can go to take that driver training to get it off your ticket.
Brett
Right.
Toledo
Shouldn't there be like a number of places online where we can go and just watch the video to. To check off the box?
Brett
But shouldn't it. Instead of make it a check mark on your record, it should erase you up to that point and start you fresh.
John Holmberg
Kind of like going to driving school.
Brett
That's what I'm talking about. Because when you go to sensitivity training.
Toledo
Shift it off your record.
Brett
When you go to sensitivity training. What you've done then is blackmark your record. It's now stained.
Toledo
Oh, I see what you're saying.
Brett
Because now your company's like, all right, he's already.
Toledo
There's proof.
Brett
Yeah. To your sensitivity training. I brewed that one. Let's get a wake up song. 5859-800. Let's get a good one together, shall we? We'll scream it. It's 98k up wake up.
Frank Caliendo
Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.
Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Episode Summary (07-31-25)
Release Date: July 31, 2025
Host/Authors: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo, and Larry McFeely
Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness on 98 KUPD | Hubbard Radio
In the July 31, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness, hosted by John Holmberg and featuring Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo, and Larry McFeely, the team delves into current societal trends, corporate culture, and pop culture controversies. The hosts blend humor with sharp commentary, providing listeners with an entertaining yet thought-provoking morning show.
The central topic of the episode revolves around American Eagle's stock rising by 10.5% following a controversy related to its recent advertisement featuring actress Sydney Sweeney. The hosts discuss how the backlash against perceived "wokeness" in the ad ironically resulted in a positive financial outcome for the company.
Bret Vesely highlights the irony:
"[07:06] Brett: American Eagle Stock went up 10 and a half percent in a day after the Sydney Sweeney controversy. So to American Eagle, to Sydney Sweeney, and to all of us."
John Holmberg points out the broader societal implications:
"[12:05] John Holmberg: ...and how many people is that pissing off right now?"
The conversation underscores a recurring theme where backlash against corporate "wokeness" inadvertently benefits the brands involved, questioning the genuine impact of such social movements on business performance.
A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to mocking the concept of corporate sensitivity training. The hosts express skepticism about its effectiveness, suggesting it often serves as a superficial solution rather than fostering genuine understanding.
Bret Vesely cynically remarks:
"[07:26] Brett: ...and I'm proud of America. I'm proud of you guys."
Larry McFeely questions its reality:
"[22:13] Larry McFeely: Maybe the fact that they ask, you know, that they're being sensitive about it."
Bret Vesely continues the satire:
"[25:18] Brett: ...Companies need to stop saying that to each other because we all deep down think it's a thing. And I don't believe it is."
The hosts argue that sensitivity training often lacks substantive content, relying instead on generic video modules and empty promises, thereby failing to address the underlying issues it intends to resolve.
The team extends their discussion to broader societal observations, touching on themes like body positivity, the resurgence of traditional values, and the commercialization of social issues.
Bret Vesely sarcastically praises American society:
"[07:09] Brett: ...I'm proud of us. American Eagle Stock went up... we stopped having body positivity be normal."
Larry McFeely adds a humorous take on historical references:
"[09:11] Larry McFeely: And if a descendant from the Third Reich is that American eagle, I tell you what, we got completely duped."
These segments reflect the hosts' critical stance on how societal shifts are managed by corporations and media, often reducing complex issues to marketing strategies without genuine commitment to change.
Interspersed with serious commentary, the episode features the hosts' trademark humor and playful interactions, keeping the tone light-hearted despite the critical discussions.
Bret Vesely humorously critiques the infamous movie Happy Gilmore:
"[05:09] Brett: ...it's going to just slaughtering numbers, and it makes me just sit back and go, okay, my finger's not on the pulse of anything anymore."
John Holmberg and Bret engage in playful exchanges about sensitivity training:
"[33:02] Larry McFeely: John has a white beard."
"[33:03] Bret: I hope you're well..."
These moments provide a balance to the episode, ensuring it remains entertaining while addressing pertinent topics.
As the episode progresses, the hosts touch upon upcoming events like the new football season, emphasizing their continued skepticism about viewership and engagement despite the hype.
Bret Vesely concludes with optimism:
"[18:15] Brett: ...a great day. I won't watch any of it. I'll know what time."
Larry McFeely echoes the sentiment with humor:
"[42:21] Frank Caliendo: Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station."
The episode wraps up with the hosts reaffirming their commitment to delivering unfiltered commentary, inviting listeners to stay tuned for more candid discussions in future episodes.
Bret Vesely on American Eagle's Stock Surge:
"[07:06] Brett: American Eagle Stock went up 10 and a half percent in a day after the Sydney Sweeney controversy."
John Holmberg on Society's Indifference:
"[12:05] John Holmberg: ...how many people is that pissing off right now?"
Bret Vesely on Sensitivity Training Myth:
"[25:18] Brett: ...Companies need to stop saying that to each other because we all deep down think it's a thing. And I don't believe it is."
Larry McFeely on Corporate Training:
"[22:13] Larry McFeely: Maybe the fact that they ask, you know, that they're being sensitive about it."
This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness offers a blend of sharp societal critique and humorous banter, challenging listeners to reflect on the effectiveness of corporate social initiatives and the true impact of societal movements on consumer behavior. Through engaging discussions and memorable quotes, the hosts maintain their position as Arizona's #1 morning radio show, entertaining and provoking thought in equal measure.