08-11-25 - BR - MON - In The 60s CIA Trained Cats To Spy On Russia - TX Man Busted Asking 11yo Girl To Change His Diaper - Woman Gets Stuck In Chuck E Cheese Kids Machine Called Snow Day

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: August 11, 2025
Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Broadcast: 98KUPD (97.9 FM), weekdays 5:30 AM – 10:00 AM

---

1. The CIA’s Feline Espionage Program in the 1960s

In this intriguing segment, Brady Bogen delves into one of the Cold War's most peculiar espionage attempts: the CIA's initiative to train house cats as Soviet spies. The program, conducted over five years with a budget of $20 million, aimed to equip cats with implanted microphones, antennas, and transmitters to gather intelligence.

Key Points:

• Objective: Utilize the unassuming nature of house cats to spy on Soviet activities.
• Implementation: Attempts were made to miniaturize surveillance equipment to fit inside cats.
• Outcome: Only one cat successfully made it into the field.

Notable Quote:

Brady Bogen [07:50]: "The CIA spent five years and 20 million trying to turn house cats into Soviet spies. They planned to implant microphones, antennas, and transmitters inside the cats."

Tragically, the lone operational cat met an untimely end when it was struck by a taxi before it could commence any espionage activities. This mishap not only marked the program's failure but also highlighted the unforeseen challenges of employing animals in covert operations.

Discussion: The hosts reflect humorously on the absurdity of the program, with Rick Brandt adding a sardonic comment:

Rick Brandt [09:01]: "So the last thing the cat heard was set it out in the field."

This segment underscores the lengths to which governments will go during high-stakes periods like the Cold War, even resorting to unconventional and ultimately ineffective methods.

---

2. Texas Man Arrested for Inappropriate Requests Involving an 11-Year-Old Girl

The podcast takes a serious turn as Brady Bogen reports on a disturbing incident involving Wesley Worrell, a Texas man who was apprehended for making inappropriate requests to an 11-year-old girl.

Key Points:

• Incident: Wesley Worrell approached the girl, wearing a BIP diaper and acting in a regressive manner, asking her to change him.
• Response: The girl's friends intervened, capturing partial license plate information and obtaining security footage.
• Arrest: Worrell was located and arrested, leading to significant legal consequences.

Notable Quote:

Brady Bogen [16:47]: "Wesley Worrell is a Texas man. He pulled up on an 11-year-old girl on her bicycle... I need you to change me."

Discussion: The hosts express their disapproval and discuss the societal implications of such behavior. Larry McFeely injects humor into the grim situation:

Larry McFeely [17:46]: "Have they told you you're going to need diapers for a little bit?"

The conversation highlights the importance of community vigilance and prompt intervention in safeguarding minors from predatory behavior. The incident serves as a stark reminder of the ongoing challenges in protecting children from exploitation.

---

3. Woman Trapped in Chuck E. Cheese’s “Snow Day” Kids Machine

In a bizarre and alarming incident, a woman became stuck in Chuck E. Cheese's popular children’s game machine named "Snow Day." The story captivated listeners with its unusual nature and the swift response required to resolve the situation.

Key Points:

• Accident Details: The woman entered the “Snow Day” machine, designed as a large, phone booth-shaped chamber where colored balls drop from the top. She became trapped, leading to a difficult extraction process.
• Response Time: Firefighters took approximately 22 minutes to free her, indicating potential design flaws or misuse of the machine.
• Public Reaction: The incident garnered significant attention on social media, amplifying the embarrassment for the individual involved.

Notable Quote:

Brady Bogen [22:46]: "It took firefighters 22 minutes to get her arm out of the hole. You’re not supposed to stick it in there all the way."

Discussion: The hosts critique the design and supervision of such amusement park attractions:

Rick Brandt [24:00]: "Imagine your most embarrassing moment and it's all caught on camera. And oh, by the way, it's going viral as well."

Brady and Rick humorously speculate on the mechanics and intent behind the “Snow Day” game, pondering whether the accumulation of white balls symbolizes an indoctrination effort or merely a malfunction. The segment serves as a commentary on safety standards in recreational facilities and the potential for public humiliation amplified by modern social media.

---

Conclusion

In this episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness, the hosts navigated through a spectrum of stories ranging from Cold War espionage antics to unsettling incidents involving public safety and personal misconduct. Each segment not only provided information but also sparked discussions that blend humor with critical observations on societal issues. Notable quotes from the hosts added depth and engagement, making the content both informative and entertaining for listeners.

For those who missed the broadcast, this episode offers a blend of historical oddities, current events, and the trademark Holmberg humor, encapsulating why Holmberg's Morning Sickness remains Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Limitless TRT]

Men, you take care of everyone else. Now let Limitless TRT and Aesthetics take care of you. Limitless TRT and Aestics is redefining sexual wellness by helping men reclaim their confidence with non Surgical Permanent male enhancement. The platinum procedure delivers instant permanent girth with minimal downtime. The P Long protocol naturally adds length and girth. No gimmicks, no guesswork, no surgery, just proven solutions that transform how you feel and look. Book your free consultation online at limitlesstrtanesthetics.com let's make you the legend you were always meant to be.

[Larry McFeely]

Touchdown deals are happening now at hooters starting at $10.99 per person. You can grab a Hooty's Pick 3 your choice of an appetizer, entree and a drink. Dig into crispy fried pickles, juicy wings or a cheeseburger and wash it all down with an ice cold fountain drink or upgrade to a cocktail or Buzzballs for just a few bucks more. Don't forget to pick your player with Big Daddy drafts of Michelob Ultra or Bud light for only $4 or DOS Equis for just five. Do Hooters has the food, drinks and game day vibes. Hooters, where the party always kicks off.

[John Holmberg]

It's Larry McFeely just had my annual Mission Beach San Diego vacation. Full of sand, sun and, yes, Toyota trucks. Mission beach lifeguards don't mess around. They roll with Toyota Tacomas, Tundras and four Runners as their official lifeguard vehicles.

[Brady]

Why?

[John Holmberg]

Because they need serious capability, dependability and the power to protect the coast. And right now, it's the national sales event at your Valley Toyota dealers. Which means it's the perfect time to grab a Toyota truck built for adventure. Whether you're hitting the beach or the Arizona Backroads, visit your Val Toyota dealer or valleytoyotadeealers.com Toyota let's go places.

[Rick Brandt]

Still streaming Homberg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com Sorry, middle of two stories at once. I want to thank Rick Brandt for sending me the most disturbing picture of a human being I've ever seen. It looks like when they took Darth Vader's mask off and revealed Anakin Skywalker under there. Only it's a real guy. He's just drinking a beer. Talk about where the down boys go. Anyway. And also, I got a whole bunch of people. Oh Jesus. Oh no. Carrie has Sent over pictures of their plane. It's a prop plane. Thanks, but no thanks. Should we regret to inform you, we're withdrawing our consideration from the position of your pool coach While he is searching for a dual prop plane to purchase. He currently owns a Piper and a Cessna. I mentioned Piper. I won't get on one of those. They scare me to death. What makes him unqualified for the patient? He also doesn't listen to the show, has no idea who you are. When I asked, you responded with no, so you're on your own. Thanks. Carrie, stop volunteering your husband for things. It is a nice plane. I'm not demeaning his ability to have a plane. He just doesn't need a cry and screaming bitch on the plane with him. And I'm not talking about you, talking about me. I can't do prop planes. They scare me to death. They move around too much. And then Sanjay, our middle eastern friend, emails, and he goes, I'm pretty good at pool. You teach me darts, I'll teach you pool. I'm like, all right, do you have a plane? And he goes, I can get one. And the last thing you want is a guy from the middle east saying, I can get you a plane. I think that's pretty much. He's out. I know how to fly it. I don't know how to land it. Okay, kamikaze. Sanjay, you're out. I'll figure it out. I got a lot of people volunteering that I want to help me play pool. This guy says, I'll help you. Homeberg. I've been playing pool for years. I'm not great, but I'm good. I'm a Steelers fan. I got a Steelers man cave. Swing over. We'll play pool, watch a game. I'm like, that seems about right. Do you have a plane? No, but I have a kegerator. That's my next question. So he's in the running. Yeah. I'm not sure I like Sanjay telling me he can get hold of a plane real quick. No, thanks. It's time for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady report, and it's brought to you by our friends over at all pro Shade. It is shady times right now. You want to get it going? Felt good yesterday when the sun went away for a little bit. We got some overcast. I don't know if there was a fire or what, but it just felt nice to not be beaten down by it. Makes you think, where's the shade? We're Always searching for shade. My dogs do it all the time. Do it for your pets, do it for you. Do it for everything. Get a shady spot in your backyard. Make your yard better. Front yard. To find a spot that you're like, you know what? We could use some shade. And this whole area would get used more. It's like adding square footage to your house without doing all that work. Check them out all prochet.com. that's where you go and cool your life off quite a bit, Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix.

[Rick Brandt]

Hello, world. Hi.

[Brady]

Happy Presidential Joke Day.

[Rick Brandt]

Jokes about the president or him telling.

[Brady]

I think it's about presidents telling jokes.

[Rick Brandt]

Two Jews walk into a bar. Brett, did you hear that? Two Jews walked into a bar. And. And it's surprising the second one walked into the bar since the first one smashed his nose on it. Should have seen it. Should have seen it coming.

[Brady]

There's some funny ones that Ronald Reagan has told over the.

[Rick Brandt]

That's right. And funnier than Ronald Reagan.

[Brady]

A lot of people say President Nixon.

[Rick Brandt]

You know, not funny.

[Brady]

Appeared on laughing.

[Rick Brandt]

That's right. Unfunny, though.

[Brady]

And came up with the term soccer.

[Rick Brandt]

To sock it to me.

[Brady]

They're crediting him for that.

[Rick Brandt]

I think they were doing socket to me, though. And that's why he did it in a question.

[Brady]

Right? A thing that said he was the.

[Rick Brandt]

Guy, that it wouldn't have made sense if he just said sock it to me. That was their catchphrase because her grandparents didn't understand what funny was. So pies in the face were hilarious. Sock it to me. I watched America's Got Talent last night, and I don't watch that show too often. They had a girl who sang opera, and she was okay, but during that, she had a fan in front of her, and they just chuck paint in front of the fan and stuff while she sang. And then they hit her with pies. And it was kind of stupid. It was like the Gong Show. But I want to show you something, Brett. All right. What's the first thing you see about her there?

[Brett Vesely]

Missing tooth.

[Rick Brandt]

And she's got a couple missing teeth, right? Yeah. Next shot. Oh, man. I think the AI her teeth in. Look at that. There she is. After, like, I. I saw that. I'm like, wait. It's the first thing I saw when she's singing. I'm like, ew. Why are her teeth missing?

[Brady]

She's got a couple of missing teeth.

[Rick Brandt]

And then when they're interviewing her full set of beautiful teeth, different shape. I'm starting to wonder.

[Brady]

And it wasn't paint on the tooth.

[Rick Brandt]

No, because that's the other thing. All the paint from the performance is the same in both pictures. I think NBC aied teeth on this girl.

[Brady]

That's quick work.

[Rick Brandt]

Well, I mean, it's recorded. It wouldn't be that quick. It's not like a live show. But they're different. They're not there in this picture at all. It was the weirdest thing I've ever seen. And I kept doing a double. I'm like, wait a second. Maybe they did this twice. And once she wore this. I think she's got aid teeth. I think that. What are we looking at on what is real anymore? I don't know if they can do that.

[Brett Vesely]

Scary.

[Rick Brandt]

It's getting horrifying.

[Brady]

It does say Nixon gave the nation a new catchphrase. Soccer too.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah, but that was their catchphrase. And I think when he said it, it took off. I think soccer to me was like a thing. Well, soccer to me is a 1920s phrase. Soccer to me. Nobody funnier than me. By the way, Brett, what's better than winning a gold medal in the Special Olympics? I don't know. Not being retarded. That's what I say. I think that's much better. It's a better thing. I like to explain the joke after as well. Being retarded is not terrible, but it's better to not be.

[Brady]

Couple of basis fun facts. The Cold War made people do crazy things. The US government was so desperate to defeat communism that in the 1960s, the CIA spent five years and 20 million trying to turn house cats into Soviet spies. They planned to implant microphones, antennas and transmitter inside and transmitters inside the cats. But only one ended up making it into the field. And sadly.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, no.

[Brady]

The cat was hit by a taxi before it was able to do any spying.

[Rick Brandt]

So the last thing the cat heard.

[Brady]

Was set it out in the field.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, God. So sorry. They just let him wander the streets as random strays and hope they picked up some government secrets.

[Brady]

Yeah. Head to the building.

[Rick Brandt]

I, I, yeah, they didn't notice the American, like, with a bag of cats just dumping them out.

[Brady]

That could have been an initial training too. Let it out.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah, because they had, they had to do it here and then get them over there.

[Brady]

Yeah, So I don't even think it made.

[Rick Brandt]

Just ran outside and got hit by cabin New York right outside the lab.

[Brady]

It's gonna work.

[Rick Brandt]

When you think about it, it's pretty brilliant. You know, I think that's actually a pretty brilliant thing when you like let's just get their house cats to have transponders.

[Brady]

Yeah, you'd never think anything about it.

[Rick Brandt]

I think it's the time that we start to nuke Ukraine. And we'll do it at noon tomorrow. What do you think? The cat is always barking about something.

[Brady]

Or they're like Dr. Evil. They all had.

[Rick Brandt]

He'S got scars for a reason. He's got transmitters inside of his body. They think maybe your cat is a spy. No, Mr. Bigglesworth would never do such a thing.

[Brady]

BMW had to recall their GPS navigation system in Germany in the 90s because German men refused to take directions from a female voice.

[Rick Brandt]

Brett's laughter says it for all of us.

[Brady]

Where's the.

[Brett Vesely]

It's true.

[Rick Brandt]

It is. It's the first thing my man brain thought. His laughter made me say. You're not supposed to put, okay.

[Brady]

Safer Safeway grocery store.

[Rick Brandt]

I like Safeway. Hey, welcome to Safe Ray.

[Brady]

What's up?

[Rick Brandt]

What up, man? You know what's over there in the produce section? I'm not even gonna say it, but we load it up.

[Brady]

The Safeway grocery stores once had a mandatory policy that employees had to smile and make eye contact with customers.

[Rick Brandt]

Creepy.

[Brady]

But they canceled after too many male customers thought the female employees were hitting on them.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, the guys are like, she's into me.

[Brady]

She likes me.

[Rick Brandt]

Well, I figured it would work the other way, where those weirdos who work at the Safeway would be eyeballing the girls, and they're like, ah, the produce guy won't stop staring into my eyes. Women are the more sketchy ones about that. I don't mind when the decent folks over at Safeway say hello and give me a look, but if I was a woman, I'd be like, yikes. How you doing? You like honey crisp apples? I love them. My name's Safe Ray. Honey crisp apple is a hard ass apple. You got veneers. They'll pop right off.

[Brady]

Researchers have found that more people often feel motion sickness in electric cars than they do in gas cars. And the science behind it is without the rumble of an engine or the vibrations, your brain gets fewer clues about when the car is about to speed up or slow down.

[Rick Brandt]

Just thinks you're speeding around at breakneck speeds with nothing underneath you.

[Brady]

Electric cars also have a feature called regenerative braking and creates a slower, deep deceleration. Yeah, all of those together. Perfect recipe for possible puke. Yeah, they say it's a neural mismatch. Remember when we got on the helicopter?

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah.

[Brady]

It affected a couple of people.

[Rick Brandt]

The other People we were with.

[Brady]

I'm getting sick because just.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah, it's chicks though. Chicks just get. They want to complain and nobody actually got sick. There's a lot of complaining, that's all. If you start throwing up, I believe you. You're just making it worse.

[Brady]

Chicago's annual duck derby happened on Thursday. Raised 600,000 for the Special Olympics. More than 82,000 rubber ducks were dumped in the Chicago river. People donated $10 per duck for a chance to win prizes, including a Chevy Trailblazer.

[Rick Brandt]

That's pretty good.

[Brett Vesely]

Got duck bullets there too, huh?

[Rick Brandt]

What? That's not that particular. They're in a good spot up there. Still got a duck, some bullets, but not as many as you should. Down south, the ducks wouldn't make it out.

[Brady]

Last Monday, this woman in Vancouver, a bear got into the her home and her Pomeranian chased it off. There's a security footage of the whole thing. Her dog Scout is only six pounds, but the bear wanted nothing to do.

[Rick Brandt]

It's like us with rats. You see a rat in your house, it wins. Like rats on the news would be like, we got another one. So one of them giants came into our house and just chased him out. You just have to show up. Bats, rats. It never surprises me when like a Pomeranian or a little terrier scares off a big animal because maybe they just are like we are with bugs and stuff. Holberg's Morning's Morning Sickness. 28. Can you repeat?

[John Holmberg]

This is Larry McFeely and we all know August in Arizona is brutal. We're talking triple digit temps that'll melt your flip flops. But Toyota trucks, don't sweat it. The tacoma tundra and 4Runner are built to handle that kind of heat. I've taken tundras across the valley and up into the mountains. No issues, no drama, just pure performance in the blazing sun. Right now is the national sales event at your valley Toyota dealers. So it's the best time to gear up. Whether you're escaping the hot weather or working in it. These trucks are made for the Arizona heat. Visit your valley toyota dealer or valleytoyotadealers.com toyota let's go places.

[Rick Brandt]

It's John Holmberg here for the amazing people at the Core Institute. A very close friend of mine had his knee surgery at the core. He's not going to be back on the court immediately, but in a few months time he will be. He's got some rehab in front of him and that's all you need to worry about. Get to work and get feeling better. Get rid of the pain. You've been living with the Core Institute celebrating 20 years because they've been changing people's lives for 20 years and you don't last that long unless you're great. Stop living with your pain and say yes to the things you love to do. Again, go to the core institute dot com.

[Brett Vesely]

Hey, Byron, I was looking at mmpguns.com's website. You have everything and the prices are incredible.

[Byron]

Yes, sir. Mmpguns.com has over 400,000 products for sale daily. Everything from firearms, ammunition, accessories, optics, clothing, decoys and more. The best part is if you see it on our website, it's in stock and ready to ship.

[Brett Vesely]

Wait, there's no backorders?

[Byron]

Nope. We work with all our distributors, so what you see on our site is what's actually available. We ship all over the country, so we're not just for Arizonans anymore. If the firearm you want is legal in your state, we can get it to a dealer for you to pick up.

[Brett Vesely]

Sounds simple. That's why I always go to mmp.guns.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness.

[Rick Brandt]

A bear's never seen a Pomeranian before. It looks like a piece of them fell off and came to life.

[Larry McFeely]

That'd be hilarious.

[Rick Brandt]

He doesn't have like cognitive reasoning. He's just like what the is that?

[Brady]

A dude in Riley Township, Pennsylvania is in custody after the police found him whacking off in his car.

[Rick Brandt]

Ryan Campbell, you've changed since your kidneys quit.

[Brady]

The officer patrolling the area near a Wawa, he said he approached the calls, he pushed the car and saw the driver leaned back, was masturbating in the car. The officer noticed there was a revolver in the passenger seat.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, he's going to kill himself after.

[Brady]

End up being a.22 caliber and rounds were spent their spent shell casings on the passenger seat and on the floor floorboard area. They had a couple of shootings happen in that neighborhood earlier that day.

[Rick Brandt]

There's a couple in that car.

[Brady]

So I guess the guy did his shootings and decided to do some shooting. Throw one down at the Wawa.

[Rick Brandt]

Shot himself too. So he was. He did the shootings.

[Brady]

He did.

[Rick Brandt]

He was guilty of it. Wow. And then he went on pleasure to. Maybe he was like me. Just had to relax.

[Brady]

Wesley Worrell is a Texas man. He. He got arrested because he pulls finished pickup pulls up this 11 year old girls on her bicycle. Wesley steps out of the pickup wearing nothing but a BIP diaper. Then he has a pacifier around his neck and he goes goo goo Gaga. I need you to change me.

[Rick Brandt]

Like Paul Manchaka.

[Brady]

Yeah, the girl, Mouth took off and went to a couple of people that were nearby. Told what happened, they called, they got a partial on the license plate, and then they pulled up video. They end up tracking down Wesley. He's. He's in trouble. There he is.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, boy. He doesn't look happy. Anyway, he's grumpy.

[Brady]

He was booked into the South County Jail, being held on a 600, 000 bond.

[Brett Vesely]

Put him in the insane asylum.

[Rick Brandt]

Have they told you you're going to need diapers for a little bit?

[Brady]

No.

[Rick Brandt]

When you're done. Are you sure?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

It's usually a pretty common thing after they do, like, a major surgery like that colostomy.

[Brady]

Because I didn't have to. Even after the. When they pulled the stone out of my.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah, but you're losing a kidney here. You're gonna have all sorts.

[Brady]

They might put a stint in.

[Rick Brandt]

Especially prednisone. Makes you poop like a goose does.

[Brady]

I don't know if that's.

[Rick Brandt]

You're gonna get all over. You're gonna moon face. Just get used to the worst of it. If I'm wrong, it's good, but just plan for it.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

If he's wrong, think of how you'll grandstand on it.

[Rick Brandt]

If he's wrong, don't even grandstand. Just. There's a good chance you're gonna be loaded up on prednisone. You're gonna get that moon head. We're gonna make fun of it for two weeks, and it goes away. But you're gonna also probably start pooping uncontrollably. Look, you've gotta. You've got a hill to climb, and I'm your realest friend. Like, I'm the only one that's telling you the real stuff. You're gonna be just fine. This is gonna suck for a bit, and you're gonna have a pantload of crap, and your head's gonna look like a Korean.

[Brady]

Oh.

[Larry McFeely]

You get a rooster tail in this room.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, yeah. You're gonna be a big disaster. But you'll be better. And every day will be a little better than the last.

[Brady]

If there's a chance of that, then I will diaper up.

[Rick Brandt]

You should, just in case. I don't need that floating around in here.

[Larry McFeely]

Might be fun for you to just let it go.

[Rick Brandt]

I think you might get used to it and start making it part of your life.

[Brady]

That could happen, too.

[Rick Brandt]

Me, too. If I start seeing benefits, I might go with you. But you might goo gaga and ask for a change too.

[Brady]

We got this little follow up on a 2 cent. Tucson man. Zane Hammond was sentenced to 29 years after pleading guilty to two counts of attempted murder. If you saw this guy was a truck driver and then November 2023, his boss sat him down, had talked to him about his hygiene, not following the rules of driving a commercial vehicle. He got so upset, drove back to his place in Phoenix, picked up a shotgun, drove back in and went to.

[Rick Brandt]

The headquarters down in Tucson.

[Brady]

And he pumped around off at the guy, went to the boss's office.

[Rick Brandt]

Holy cow.

[Brady]

And he fired around. The boss was able to flip his.

[Rick Brandt]

Desk up and just in time. He saw it coming down matrix or something. Jesus.

[Brett Vesely]

So it's pretty quick.

[Brady]

Then he went to reload. That's when the boss that he had, he shot at two people on the second guy. Grabbed him out of him in a chokehold.

[Rick Brandt]

Never went, oh, somebody stopped him with some good, that's what you do.

[Brady]

Tackled him, put him in a chokehold, took him. The police arrived.

[Rick Brandt]

Good. You gotta fight one of those lunatics that starts wandering around with a building. And this is what we talked about.

[Brady]

Came up from Tucson to Phoenix.

[Rick Brandt]

Right. Well, it's tough when you're in Tucson and somebody says you've got bad hygiene. Yeah, like that's, that's a low blow. My guess is if he was from Phoenix and he was in Tucson and they said he's got bad hygiene, it's because they smell soap.

[Brady]

Now he's looking at 29 years cleanliness.

[Rick Brandt]

You smell different than all of us Tucsonians and we don't like it. I'm gonna have to say I think it's your hygiene. You're doing it too much. Your hygiene's too good for Tucson. Knock it off. You're making everybody sick with your floral and delicious scents. You need to smell like all of us here in Tucson, like sadness and poverty.

[Brady]

IKEA is going to open 10 mini locations inside of Best Buy stores. And eventually I think they're going to try to put them in all Best Buys. So the, the goal is they'll showcase stuff from their kitchen and laundry room lines, hoping people shopping for a fridge will decide they also need to redesign their kitchen.

[Rick Brandt]

Best Buy will redesign your whole kitchen. So that's cool.

[Brady]

Yeah. Through ikea.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah. Gotta hand it to Best Buy. I didn't think they'd last through this whole Internet thing.

[Brady]

Well, they're trying. I mean they're always there trying to.

[Rick Brandt]

Do some more stuff.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

You still go in there. And there's still like a billion TVs and people want it around.

[Brady]

How many locations of Ikeas do you think we have in the US.

[Rick Brandt]

Like 270.

[Brady]

52.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

I knew it was one in every state almost.

[Rick Brandt]

That's right. Well done. That's right. Excellent job. There's 50 states and 52 IKEA. He's almost dead on money there.

[Brady]

An unidentified woman in California was at a Chuck E. Cheese last Thursday afternoon when she decided to go inside the kids game called Snow Day.

[Rick Brandt]

Yuck. Snow Day at the Chuck E. Cheese. Oh.

[Brady]

She got her arm stuck somehow.

[Rick Brandt]

Is there liquid in it?

[Brady]

So kids go into this large phone booth shaped chamber and balls drop from the top. You're supposed to grab your ball. The balls with the colored balls.

[Rick Brandt]

Careful.

[Brady]

Because it's mostly white.

[Rick Brandt]

We get it snowing. We understand that. All right, that's enough.

[Brady]

And you drop.

[Rick Brandt]

That's enough. You're gonna kill blue.

[Brady]

Purple falls into the hole. So she was.

[Rick Brandt]

So you just make it all white. So it's a way to make things always. So it's a clan game.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

Let's get rid of these colors more.

[Brady]

The more colors you accumulate, the more colors you.

[Rick Brandt]

The wider your snow globe is and the better the world is.

[Brady]

The points that you get, the prizes you are.

[Rick Brandt]

The point is make the worldwide again.

[Brady]

Yes.

[Rick Brandt]

Kids. Chuck E. Chuck E. Cheese is trying to save the world. Don't you just hate colored balls? Wouldn't it be great if we could just eliminate all the colored balls except the white ones? Of course.

[Brady]

She got 10. Indigo red or. No, that's purple.

[Rick Brandt]

No, try. Are you all right?

[Brady]

No. I was trying to think of the crayon color. The Indian red.

[Rick Brandt]

I knew it. Banned anyway.

[Brady]

It took firefighters 22 minutes to get her arm out of the hole. You're not supposed to stick it in there all the way.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah.

[Brady]

For some reason. I don't know why she's reaching in there.

[Larry McFeely]

Because she's a kid and she's an idiot. John had said that.

[Rick Brandt]

I'm pretty sure I talk about that a lot. She's also an American kid. So she's fat and didn't fit in the hole.

[Brady]

It wasn't a kid.

[Rick Brandt]

It was an adult.

[Brady]

Yes.

[Rick Brandt]

A woman's very young girlfriend who you'd think would enjoy the snow thing. But she's old.

[Brady]

Now they have a picture of her. You can only see. Can't see her face. But you can see all the people. The cell phones came out in full force.

[Rick Brandt]

The giant lady stuck in the racist Machine. Make it white. Machine. It's the line around the block of hillbillies trying to get in there. So the goal is to eliminate all the colors. I've been trying that my whole life.

[Brady]

It's actually probably only the video. It's a. The news story soon. You thought Chuck E. Cheese was only for kids? Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

Well, your fat arm got stuck in the machine for kids, so I'm not shocked.

[Larry McFeely]

Did you say the game is called Snow Day?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

That'S. It's just such a clear indoctrination of a child's mind when it's all white. In the end, you've won. Okay. Is that her jammed in there?

[Brady]

Yep.

[Rick Brandt]

No day. Imagine your most embarrassing moment and it's all caught on camera. And oh, by the way, it's going viral as well. That's what happened to a woman when she went to Chuck E. Cheese in Burbank. Gordon Tokamatsu. Way too big to be. Maybe you've heard of people getting stuck on a bank. Firefighters took 22 minutes to free her. So how did this happen? Good question. But the answer is not that clear. We did, however, find some social media clips. I like that he gave himself a little props for his question. How did this happen? Good question. Small colored balls drop. He said it too. This is terrible. All right, keep going.

[Brady]

It's time for some radio videos. First one is a little gymnastics. The parallel bar.

[Rick Brandt]

Okay.

[Brady]

The guy's dismount. They didn't think it be possible. Thought the mat area is long enough.

[Rick Brandt]

Was way up there.

[Brady]

He's. He's pretty good.

[Rick Brandt]

He's doing some splits.

[Brady]

Actually.

[Rick Brandt]

Clears it. Oh, no, he just. Just left. He missed the mat completely and landed on his way, far away from the mat. Wow. Is he okay? He's.

[Brady]

No, he died.

[Rick Brandt]

He's dead. No, you're going to. You're going to be next to him in the hospital in a couple weeks.

[Brady]

I might get a kidney out.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah, that dude might have a good kidney for you since he doesn't need him anymore. Do you. Do you do that yet? That's what you're hoping? That's what I've always said when they tell. I've said. I made this joke for years. Is that when they tell somebody, you're going to need a new kidney. You're. The way you watch the news totally changes. Because when you hear two teenagers died in a car accident, guys like, hey, all right. Like, it totally changes how. And you're there now because you're gonna need one. So you watch the news going Three, a school bus was crushed by Godzilla.

[Brady]

You check it like stocks?

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah.

[Larry McFeely]

Can you go to the accident site? Do they have a dnr?

[Rick Brandt]

What he wants is what Brady deep down right now wants is like. Like a bus of 17 year old kids to go off a cliff. Like 18 or 19 kids. Yeah. The odds of having a match in there is much higher.

[Brett Vesely]

We're here with Byron from MMP Guns. Byron, why should someone choose to go to MMP Guns?

[Byron]

The choice is simple, Brett. MMP Guns is your one stop shop for all your shooting needs. We offer Arizona's largest selection handguns, rifles, shotguns, new and pre owned. We also have a large selection of ammunition, accessories and even training. In fact right now all pre owned fire are 20% off. All new firearms are 10% off. We have ammo ink 9mm hollow points for only $12.99 a box and much more.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, it sounds like MMP Guns is committed to providing the customers with the best possible service and selection.

[Byron]

That's a fact. You can visit us at the store at northeast corner of 12th street in Indian School or online at mmpguns.com It's.

[Rick Brandt]

John Holmberg here from the morning sickness and it's time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of my home group and Doug Hopkins.com I tell you about the house down the street from me that has had a for sale sign in the yard for three months now. In fact it's, it's the fourth different sign. They've got a new realtor all the time. I do know this though, they wouldn't be dealing with all this stress if they'd have just called TVs Doug Hawkins because he's more than a guy buying your house. He makes an offer for your house, cash as is. You don't have to do anything. The deal is over. So all you gotta do is start the process [e-mail] or sing Hopkins 1-800-sale now it's John Holmberg here for turfmonstersaz.com if that yard of yours doesn't look great all of the time, if it is work all of the time, it does not have to be. Turf monsters can come to your house and make your yard a beautiful showcase place for you, your family, your pets. Yeah, it's pet friendly as well. Anything you can dream up in that backyard, they can do. Tell them Homeburg sent you. Get 10% off turf monsters AZ.com Homeburg's.

[Brady]

Morning sickness and even so that takes a lot longer.

[Rick Brandt]

Still though, let's just get you in this, like, the way you're watching.

[Brady]

Get in.

[Larry McFeely]

Like, he's saying, if there's 17 or 18 of these kids on a bus, that's 17 or 18 spots close.

[Rick Brandt]

They got a surplus, and they got to get it in somebody fast. So the list shrinks by quite a lot. So you got to be cheering every time you see, like, horrible tragedy where a Mormon. Mormon youth group's plane crashed today. Yes. Mormon, too. Yes, yes, yes. There were no survivors.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, if it's a bus of kids.

[Rick Brandt]

From Maryville or something, he'll take it. Yeah, give him some street cred, maybe.

[Larry McFeely]

A hankering for some new foods.

[Rick Brandt]

No, he doesn't have that. He's hankered. All he's going for.

[Brady]

Next one's bull fighting again. But this guy, the one guy sets up the dude to jump over the bull.

[Rick Brandt]

So he's got to run at a bull and jump it. Yeah, here comes the bull.

[Brady]

This is the bait guy.

[Rick Brandt]

He baits, and the other guy's supposed to jump, and he misses and the bull upends him. And then the bull comes back and says, you're done. He's out cold from getting hit.

[Brady]

He did a couple of summers on his head.

[Rick Brandt]

He landed directly on his head.

[Brady]

See if it resets. That's it. Move him.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah, get him. Yeah, scooch him around. Get him off of there.

[Brady]

Watch the twirl on this. If it doesn't hesitate, he chases the.

[Rick Brandt]

One guy and then the other guy tries to leap over him. Oh, it's two somersaults under the head. I can see it. And then the bull just kind of runs by him, goes, oh, I already finished him off.

[Brady]

Yeah, he's dead. That's why it's working. Other guys, the bull's coming at you. Lay down dead.

[Rick Brandt]

They bulls coming at you. You've. What kind of life are you living? I'm 53. I've never had a bull coming at me. I've dodged that. If I see a bull a long ways away, I'm like, don't get too close to that. I don't usually, if there's not a fence between me and the bull, I've found safe, higher ground. I don't want to mess with that.

[Brady]

I'm not.

[Rick Brandt]

Also, I don't go to Mexico. It seems to happen there a lot.

[Brett Vesely]

Or title. Nine was bulls.

[Rick Brandt]

Well, that's a different one. I've had those bulls coming at me before. Again, same thing. Just cross the street.

[Brady]

Not sure what. The league will come up with a name for this fight. Club. But it's a new fighting league with people that have. They're either amputees.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, disability fighting league. In the streets. In the dirt streets of horses of India.

[Brady]

See, they do sweat.

[Rick Brandt]

They fight their cripples. They're disturbingly crippled. This jack torso. What is the thing on the ground?

[Brady]

He swept the leg. He swept the good leg.

[Rick Brandt]

I don't know that you did it on purpose. I think his body just spins like that. Oh, my God. He has. He went. He's chest cavity into thighs. There's no middle. And the other Indian, generous. The other Indian has thrillers left leg. And that's it. His right leg seemed fine, but he's got like a child's left leg and a regular adult right leg. And then like some sort of weird gigantism of the left arm. And he just beats the tar of the dude with no middle. His legs are just shooting out of his chest. That's he just poorly drawn is all.

[Brady]

It's a packed house. You got the upper deck going full. People watching.

[Rick Brandt]

That's just part of Ganesha's plan.

[Brady]

I think that's the only room that's available.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah. That is how I picture all of India, by the way. Several hundred people at all times watching whatever's going on. And some poorly deformed guy who came from water. Rivers, from the contamination of all their drinking water. You make babies like this now and again.

[Larry McFeely]

So it happens with Bull Paul.

[Rick Brandt]

You have no choice in India but to gather in a crowd and watch. No matter what you're doing, there's no, like, alone time.

[Larry McFeely]

Hey, you got a dress. I mean, you gotta wear your scarf.

[Rick Brandt]

You gotta have your. Your. All. Your gear has to be on at all times. Unless you're crippled, then you can strip down.

[Brett Vesely]

And that's some drip.

[Rick Brandt]

Drip. Some Indian Drip. If you see Indian Drip is a great band name.

[Brady]

I heard Dana White's interested buying this.

[Rick Brandt]

Indian Drip is either a great band name or a name of a new std. I've got the Indian Drip.

[Larry McFeely]

If you see over here, the next athlete is getting ready to go, like, next to the guy here in the maroon.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah. There's like a guy with a whip handling the cripples. It's like cockfighting with just completely broken people. There's never been a time in India where a guy's just like, I just want to be alone. It's. It's impossible. You're in India. There's no way. It happens. All right, Brett, what do you got?

[Brett Vesely]

All right, we're a little Light today.

[Rick Brandt]

Sorry.

[Brett Vesely]

It's Monday, and we're.

[Rick Brandt]

Okay.

[Brett Vesely]

Start with some. Some work activity here.

[Rick Brandt]

All right. Surveillance camera.

[Brady]

OSHA special.

[Rick Brandt]

OSHA violation. The guy's doing some work. He's got. Appears to be some sort of a conveyor belt. Moving drywall or something. Yeah, plywood or drywall. He's getting up on the machine. A piece of drywall or wood just shoots across the room. The machine malfunctions and backs one out.

[Brady]

It's right there.

[Rick Brandt]

Yeah. Oh, it's stuck. And it just shoots backwards in a. Definitely not what that machine is designed to do. At 100 miles an hour, a piece of drywall just goes flying across the room and beat this one.

[Brett Vesely]

May have some cussing to it, so just be careful. Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

What is this? Oh, God. Just starts shooting at a tree. It's lightning. Oh, it was.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

Oh, my God. Are there people in the tree? Why is everyone screaming? Oh, geez. Yeah. Make a baseball bat out of that. Hell yeah. Be the natural wonder boy. That's wonder Boy. That's how wonder boy was born. Oh, man, this slow mo is awesome. The brother inside is losing it. That whole tree comes down. House did good. Kept the house together. I bent it a little, but I was expecting to just go away. Damn. All right, there's another one.

[Brett Vesely]

A little fight action.

[Rick Brandt]

Maybe we're out in the streets of Poland or Russia or something. Dude got bears. But what did he get hit with? It was bear spray or something. Oh. He starts to chase a guy, and he sprays him with something. Puts him down. Oh, he throws. He throws some sort of liquid in his face and knocks him on him. That's arsenic. He killed him, Brady. You should get that guy's kidneys too. It's his buddy that. Oh, he just lays him out with some sort of a death spray. That's not bear spray. He goes out cold.

[Brady]

Something else. I mean, those guys walking on the other side after he sprays.

[Rick Brandt]

I don't know. But he hit that dude directly in the face, whatever that spray is, and he passed out. I gotta get some of that stuff.

[Brett Vesely]

This may be AI, but considering all the talk we've had the last couple weeks.

[Rick Brandt]

All right, we're throwing dildos into a boy's mouth. The boys are in their bedroom throwing the still dough back and forth. Oh, he did. He nailed it.

[John Holmberg]

Wait, is that.

[Rick Brandt]

Right into his mouth? And it goes right into his throat. That's brilliant. Excellent. If your kids are gonna throw them, practice first.

[Brett Vesely]

They kept sending me this one last week, and I kept. So they Keep sending it. So I'm just gonna play it.

[Rick Brandt]

All right. All right. There's a man in a magician's hat. He's a magician standing behind a woman. He's got his wand out, and he's gonna. He's doing it in the duet. The magician's got a thick one. Oh, right in the bottom. Oh, there we go. And then it comes out her mouth. All the other magicians.

[Brett Vesely]

It wasn't Friday quality enough. They sent it to me on Friday.

[Rick Brandt]

So I was just like, we're. That one. Yeah. The magician puts it in her butt, and it pops out of her mouth. That's. That's good magic. Here's a lady with a pocket pee in her mouth, and it's huge. And so are her lips. Way overdone. Same with her clown cans. And she has put her tongue through the pocket V all the way to the other. That's just gross. I don't need to see that again.

[Brett Vesely]

And then we'll just end with this one.

[Rick Brandt]

All right. All right, Here we go. Oh, no. Naked lady. She's doing herself with a toy in the behind. What's that little weird little girl button that's starting to shoot boy juice at me? It's boy chest. I don't know what this is. Oh, my God. That's. I'd rather watch Brady's cripples fight.

[Brady]

Is that a micro piece?

[Rick Brandt]

It's a. It's a micro piece, but it's a hermaphrodite. No, that's a lady button that's going a little boy on it. So she's got some. She's got some herm going because she's got boy chest.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

I think her lady button is a micro penis. Yes.

[Larry McFeely]

Look at those meat paws.

[Rick Brandt]

I don't know what. I don't know what exactly is going on, but I know that Brady's right. It's a micro penis where the lady button should be. But I think there's still a girl hole anyway. No, no, Brady. City of 5 million people, probably. No, there's probably like 10 or 11 of those out there right now doing that. Yeah, it's probably a few hundred.

[Brady]

I don't know about that.

[Rick Brandt]

10 or 11 of them right now. That exact exercise, that exact thing you just watched. We could get, like, a live cam. It looked like an old pert commercial.

[Brady]

Leo, you're supposed to say way low. Yeah, I think there's about 5,000.

[Larry McFeely]

Yeah, I think on that number, he's pretty accurate.

[Rick Brandt]

There's a few hundred of those. There's a few hundred of those walking around and about 10 or 11 of them right now, or can't imagine right now how many people are pleasuring themselves as we speak.

[Brady]

What do you think the number is.

[Rick Brandt]

Of the 5 million?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Rick Brandt]

Currently 20 minutes before most people go to work. 900,000. No, it's not. All the third shifters are home now. 900,000. Two tempes are currently pleasuring themselves right now. Yeah. And it's starting to register in your head as possible, isn't it?

[Brady]

No kids, like teenagers.

[Rick Brandt]

It is not too high.

[Brady]

They're already at school.

[Rick Brandt]

Some. Some schools start at 9, some are doing it at school. 900,000 old folks homes. It wouldn't take much to get to 900,000. A fifth, like 10 per neighborhood. 10 per neighborhood. It's nothing, guaranteed. There are 10 people in that apartment complex behind us currently tugging away that apartment complex. I mean, that's exactly right. So there. And how many apartments. There's 900,000 people right now tugging or just finishing up, giving themselves a tug. You hate that that's happening, but it's happening. Why? What?

[Brady]

Yeah, I do.

[Rick Brandt]

What number do you think is happening?

[Brady]

I don't think it's that high.

[Rick Brandt]

Where are you at? City of 5 million people.

[Brady]

Maybe a hundred thousand.

[Rick Brandt]

No way. Way low. Way low.

[Larry McFeely]

A hundred thousand is still a huge number.

[Brady]

That is a huge number.

[Rick Brandt]

900 is the correct number.

[Brady]

I wouldn't go that. I would say, you know, 10.

[Rick Brandt]

But why do you think they're priests.

[Brady]

A hundred thousand.

[Rick Brandt]

I mean, how many priests are. There's probably a few hundred of those. And a couple, maybe a thousand. They're all doing it right now. They can't stop. There's kids shows on it. It's like the education hour in pbs. They can't get enough. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady Report. It's 98 KUPD, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect.

[Brett Vesely]

Hey, Byron. I heard you have something new to announce from MMP Guns, Brett.

[Byron]

I sure do. It's MMP Guns Customs. MMP Guns is creating some amazing firearms. We offer polishing, plating, bluing, custom laser engraving, laser stippling, cerakoting and performance upgrades. We do everything in house with our master trained craftsmen. You can select our designs or make up your own.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, can you do this to my gun?

[Byron]

We can do it to nearly any firearm. Doesn't matter where you live, you can ship it to us or. We already have completed firearms in inventory daily with. No wait.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, there you have it. MMP guns on the northeast corner of 12th street and Indian School or online at MMP GU.

[Doug Hopkins]

Alright, HMS podcast time again. It'll let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. East side and Tempe at the Improv Catch the always hilarious Carlos Mencia. Funny Marco will be performing his sets downtown at Standup Live and at the Desert Ridge Improv. You've got the one and only Annie Letterman entertaining you all week. For the complete lineups and for Tickets, go to standuplive.com, desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com hey, it's Brett Vesely.

[Brett Vesely]

Look, your AC has been working hard for you all summer long, so give it some love with Patrick Riley Heating, Cooling, Plumbing and Drains. Right now you can get a $59 H VAC system check which includes a full equipment inspection, refrigerant level check and free electronic leak detection. And that's a $99 value. Need a new system?

[Rick Brandt]

No problem.

[Brett Vesely]

Score fifteen hundred dollars off right now. Hot and stuck. Well, they offer emergency same day service and before you commit, get a free second opinion with no pressure. Go to Patrick rileyservices.com that's patrickreillyservices.com Patrick one call does it all.