Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness, 08-26-25

Episode Theme:
This episode centers around a bizarre and disturbing news story about a man who had a 25-inch live eel surgically removed from his colon. The hosts—John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo—discuss the incident with their trademark irreverence, using the story as a springboard for dark humor, warnings, and riffing on related topics. The conversation weaves through medical oddities, sexual experimentation, and social commentary in the show’s typical outrageous style.

Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. The Eel Incident: A Deep Dive

[01:47 – 08:21]

• John Holmberg recounts a news story where Vietnamese doctors encountered a 31-year-old man with a "live two-foot-long eel" inside his abdomen, after he had inserted it rectally for sexual pleasure.
• The eel attempted to escape by “chew[ing] its way out”, causing internal injuries. The man had also lodged a lime inside to prevent the eel from escaping the way it entered.
  • “Two feet’s a little aggressive. I think you could have found a smaller eel.” — John Holmberg [01:52]
• Emergency surgery was performed:
  • Doctors tried to remove the foreign object through the anus but couldn't due to the lime.
  • They conducted imaging, found the eel had bitten through the patient’s colon, and had to make an abdominal incision to remove it.
  • “Once he broke through, he was done.” — John Holmberg [02:27]
• The team marvels at the length and diameter of the eel (25 inches, 4 inches in diameter) and discusses possible motives and the man’s experience:
  • “He had the lime handy. So this was not the first time he's gone eel and ass and recognized it.” — John Holmberg [05:30]
• They joke about this type of behavior being commonplace, referencing doctors' admissions that “patients recently, a lot—typical young men—were putting objects in their bums for sexual pleasure: bottles, cups, adult toys… this is the first case involving a live eel.” [05:17]
• The hosts note that eels’ biology allows them to survive in low oxygen and to potentially “bite through gastrointestinal tract,” cautioning listeners against such acts.
  • “People should never insert live animals through the anus. That's also a warning that has to go out.” — John Holmberg [05:35]

2. Humor, Warnings, and Comparisons

[04:50 – 08:18]

• The team injects crass humor, referencing adult websites, and making surreal connections:
  • “So you know, it's like what the girls go through on black2.com.” — John Holmberg [04:53]
  • On previous occurrences: A 12-inch eel had also been removed from another man in the same year.
  • Jokes about checking for additional objects (“don’t look any further”) and defensive explanations by patients.
• They riff on personal experience and fantasy “levels”—the idea the man had “worked his way up to that”.
• John cautions listeners about the risks and recommends commercially made butt plugs as “safer.”

3. Grindr Commentary & Airplane Anxiety

[08:22 – 09:50]

• Holmberg pivots to dating apps, joking:
  • “I didn’t see anybody on my messages holding a snake or an eel.” — John Holmberg [08:32]
• Expresses concern over public hygiene and air travel:
  • “That’s why I don’t want to fly next to anybody. I want bigger seats, I want more space. ... I bet you I’ve been on a plane before. The guy’s had something with an eel effort living in his ass. Bigger seats, bigger eels.” — John Holmberg [08:47]

4. Listener Interaction and Extreme Scenarios

[09:50 – 11:01]

• Reads a listener message pondering self-removal of the eel and the lengths someone might go before seeking medical aid.
  • “I don’t think I go to the hospital for this. I think I let it kill me.” — John Holmberg [10:08]
• Compares the scenario to the Grand Canyon—alluding to situations with irreversible consequences.
  • “You’re not coming back from that story.” — John Holmberg [10:31]

5. Eel News in Japan

[11:01 – 11:12]

• Briefly touches on another eel-related incident in Japan where tainted eel at a department store led to one death and 12 hospitalizations.
  • “If you were in the grocery section of this department store last week and had some roasted eel, it was evidently rotten... Eel news!” — John Holmberg [11:04]

Notable Quotes and Memorable Moments

• “Two feet’s a little aggressive. I think you could have found a smaller eel.” — John Holmberg [01:52]
• “People should never insert live animals through the anus. That’s also a warning that has to go out.” — John Holmberg [05:35]
• “At least do the thing with a butt plug. They’ve got a built-in blocker so it doesn’t slide all the way through.” — John Holmberg [06:46]
• “That eel grew up in his hands and has grown to two feet and four inches in diameter. That is not that eel’s first venture into the intestine.” — John Holmberg [07:00]
• ”That’s why I don’t want to fly next to anybody... I bet you I’ve been on a plane before. The guy’s had something with an eel … living in his ass.” — John Holmberg [08:47]
• “I don’t think I go to the hospital for this. I think I let it kill me.” — John Holmberg [10:08]
• ”Eel news! We don’t have a song for that, I guess.” — John Holmberg [11:04]

Skit Segment: Officer Rico Blaze Drops In

[11:12 – 15:03]

• Character “Officer Rico Blaze” makes a comedic appearance with over-the-top sexual innuendo, discussing preferences for “big-boned women” and riffing on the episode’s earlier themes with exaggerated bravado.
• Rico Blaze comments humorously on women's sexual exploration, sizes, and race, delivering crass, raunchy “police” banter:
  • “I have a two-foot moray eel that is dark black. It ain’t got no teeth. Girl. It’ll go right in there and it ain’t eating you from the inside out. That’s my job.” — Officer Rico Blaze [11:32]
  • “Every time you hear Trump or Kamala. Kamala putting on a little weight too. … Kamala’s not getting what she should be getting. I seen her husband. That man’s eel is a goldfish.” — Officer Rico Blaze [12:16]
  • “Remember those little lost soccer players? Yeah, I found them. … I said, let me throw them a rope. I’ve been in bigger, fatter holes than this cave.” — Officer Rico Blaze [13:38]
• Holmberg and crew riff further, ending the segment with joking about who should or shouldn’t “put eels in their ass.”

Important Timestamps

• [01:47] – Eel news story begins
• [04:50] – Details on the patient’s choices, objects, and medical response
• [05:17] – Medical expert’s comments and warning
• [06:46] – Butt plug safety advice
• [08:22] – Grindr joke and travel-related anxieties
• [10:08] – Debate over seeking medical help vs. letting the eel “kill me”
• [11:01] – Japanese eel incident, food poisoning
• [11:12 – 15:03] – Officer Rico Blaze “police work” comedy sketch

Conclusion

This episode is emblematic of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness: riffing on outlandish headline news with candid, often crude humor and quick-witted banter. Through the story of the man and the eel, the crew laces gross-out details with running gags about sexual experimentation, bad decisions, and the dangers of curiosity—always in their irrepressibly brash style. The message (in typical HMS fashion): “Don’t put eels in your ass. Leave it to the professionals (or at least use a butt plug).”