09-05-25 - FULL SHOW - FRIDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – Arizona’s #1 Morning Radio Show (09-05-25)

Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely
Date: September 5, 2025
Episode Theme: Football, Outrage Culture, and the Absurdities of Modern Life

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Episode Overview

This Friday episode of "Holmberg’s Morning Sickness" explores the return of football season, the outrage over podcast delays, the bizarre culture of fighting and spitting in sports, the politics of business and identity, and a smattering of hilariously off-color life observations. The show’s classic irreverence is on full display, with John and the crew riffing on everything from NFL lightning delays to the possibility of politicians faking their sexuality. With co-host Dick Toledo absent due to a personal loss, the team juggles personal and professional matters while keeping listeners laughing.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

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1. Toledo’s Absence and Listener Outrage

• [00:45] John opens with an update: Dick Toledo is out due to his mother’s passing and handling family arrangements in Montana.
• The team is irked by impatient listeners complaining about late podcasts:
  • “The dude is at his mother’s service. Give him a minute.” – John [02:25]
  • Listeners compared their need for the morning show to Brady “needing a new kidney.”
• John ribs the audience for prioritizing their schedules over someone’s family tragedy, mocking their “inconvenience.”

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2. Football Is Back: NFL Lightning Delays and Fan Safety

• [05:00] NFL opening night marred by long weather delays in the Eagles-Cowboys game due to lightning.
• The group debates whether football’s stopped caring about fans, blaming lawsuits and “soccer ruining everything.”
  • “Not a fan has ever been injured in a lightning storm, ever!” – John [06:45]
  • “Soccer, the world's worst sport, ruined the NFL’s pussy approach to weather.” – John [08:20]
• Old-school perspective: Teams used to “practice in the rain” and play through anything; delays are a recent “money machine” phenomenon.
• The crew blames “lawyers ruining everything” and reminisces about the toughness of earlier NFL eras.

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3. Jalen Carter Spitting on Dak Prescott: The Ultimate Insult

• [12:00] Detailed recap of Jalen Carter (Eagles) spitting on Dak Prescott (Cowboys)—and the fallout.
• John considers spitting “the ultimate insult”:
  • “You spit on most men and that is going to be—that’s the lowest you can be, and it’s also the trashiest thing ever.” – John [12:16]
  • “Even Chris Collinsworth said, ‘You might as well just spit on your coach’s face and your teammates. That’s the most selfish thing I’ve seen.’” – John [12:35]
• John recounts his childhood experience of being spit on, establishing deep disgust:
  • “From that day forward…spitting on human beings is just disgusting. ... It’s the universal N-word for all humanity.” – John [17:16]
• The show debates whether Dak spit first, the idea of controlled versus intentional spitting, and reactions from fans around the league.

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4. Sportsmanship, Fighting, and ‘De-Escalation’

• [21:35] John consults with Jay from Tactical Black about self-defense and “de-escalation.”
  • “De-escalation is the best self-defense…But Jay even said you spit on me—all bets are off.” – John [34:07]
• Universal agreement: Being spit on is “the universal bodily fluid N-word” and justifies almost any reaction.
• Explores the legal line between assault and self-defense, especially in sports contexts.

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5. Sex, Relationships, and Adult “Spitting”

• [16:00+] John shifts gears, hilariously venting about how spitting’s become common in porn, especially blowjobs and “snowballing.”
• Epically candid quotes about intimacy and adult power dynamics:
  • “There’s a Zeus-like feeling at that moment. As powerful as you feel, you’re at your most fragile.” – John [33:17]
• Brady uncomfortably objects to the “against God” nature of the discussion.

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6. Late-Stage Sports: Tyson vs. Mayweather and Old Men in the Ring

• [41:00] The team debates the announced novelty fight between Mike Tyson (approaching 60) and Floyd Mayweather (48):
  • “Please, for God’s sake, let’s send a message: we don’t want to watch this.” – John [43:52]
• Discussion on how a sport’s quality declines if old men can compete at the top.
  • “If a 50-year-old man does well in a sport, something’s wrong with the sport.” – John [45:23]
• Lambaste the spectacle as “worse than WWE” and beg listeners not to pay for it.

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7. Political Comedy: Is Pete Buttigieg Faking Being Gay?

• [50:57] John gleefully discusses Tucker Carlson’s claim that Pete Buttigieg is “fake gay.”
  • “Who would do such a thing, faking being a homosexual just to get away with stuff?” – John [51:00]
  • “If you say you’re gay and you lie about it, I need to know. You’re the Rachel Dolezal of BJ’s.” – John [57:14]
• Crew imagines absurd “proof” requirements for politicians and relishes the comedic value regardless of political side.

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8. The Politics of Commerce: Should You Boycott Ideological Businesses?

• [66:55] John debates whether to purchase from a prosthetics company that publicly tells Trump supporters to “delete us as a follower.”
• Rich discussion on the dangers of “tribalization” and the parallels to other forms of exclusion.
  • “Why is it bad to take someone’s money who disagrees with you? Money votes green.” – John [70:19]
• Brady advises: “I’m looking for another company.” [70:32]
• Audience emails weigh in on both sides; lively debate about whether ideological litmus tests make sense for business.

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9. Brady Reports, Science News, and Hypotheticals

• [96:31] Brady hosts the “Brady Report” with odd facts:
  • Most billionaires by state, Olympic painting medals, and USPS Statue of Liberty mishaps.
• [106:53] Science News: Glow-in-the-dark plants, robot dog badminton, adverse effects of helicopter parenting, theories on alien comets.
  • “If the 20-mile city lands on Earth, I’m pretty much like, ‘They win.’” – John [113:10]
• [104:39] Amusing inventions: "Tin Can" phones intended for kids (but really for untrusting wives).

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10. Rapid-Fire Bits: LEGO World Records, Gross-Out Videos, and Aging

• [116:31] World record for running on Legos, upcoming massive Star Wars LEGO set.
• The show’s always-raunchy “Friday Videos” include disgusting feats, including the infamous “foot taco” and more, prompting Brady’s horror.
• Reflection on old age, mortality, sexuality, and the indignities of living too long:
  • “I’m kind of against modern medicine. I liked Brady’s God’s original plan where we died around 30.” – John [128:48]

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11. Guadalupe Squares: NFL Edition

• [158:38+] Hilarious, rapid-fire impersonations (Jerry Jones, O.J. Simpson, Bill Belichick, Trump, Patrick Mahomes, Tripp Reeb, and more).
• Gags on football, pop culture, and the state of the world wrap up the week with a chaotic, irreverent game show.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• On spitting and humanity:
  • “Spitting on another person is universal N-word for all of humanity…It’s the line you do not cross.” – John [17:16]
• On NFL lawsuits and fans:
  • “Not a fan has ever been injured in a lightning storm, ever!” – John [06:45]
• On adult power dynamics:
  • “You feel pretty powerful with your wang in someone’s head. But as powerful as you feel, you’re at your most fragile.” – John [33:17]
• On political posturing in business:
  • “Their post underneath that says: ‘If you don’t treat folks how you like to be treated, you’re not welcome here.’ … I don’t like anybody who says, ‘If you don’t believe exactly the same way I do, I don’t want your business.’” – John [70:59]
• On politics and proof:
  • “I would pay $60 on a Saturday night to watch Pete Buttigieg prove it to us. Like a Black Mirror episode!” – John [57:20]
• On spectator sports:
  • “If a sport’s champion is over 50, your sport is broken.” – John [45:23]

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Important Segment Timestamps

• [00:45] — Opening: Toledo’s absence and podcaster outrage.
• [05:00] — NFL lightning delays: lawsuits, fan safety, and old-school football.
• [12:00] — Jalen Carter spits on Dak Prescott: cultural taboo explored.
• [16:00] — Why spitting in porn is gross; relationship power moves.
• [41:00] — Tyson vs. Mayweather spectacle criticized.
• [50:57] — Is Pete Buttigieg “fake gay”? The comedy of being “fooled” in politics.
• [66:55] — Should you boycott politicized businesses? The “tribe” problem.
• [96:31] — Brady Report: billionaires, Olympics, funny facts.
• [106:53] — Science news: glow-in-the-dark plants, aliens, robot dogs.
• [158:38] — Guadalupe Squares NFL edition: character impersonations and final laughs.

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Show Tone

• Irreverent, raunchy, and unfiltered. The show mocks outrage culture, political correctness, sports decorum, aging, and the human condition. Nothing is sacred and the tone is boldly comic, sometimes shocking, but always rooted in banter and camaraderie.

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For New Listeners

If you missed this episode, you missed a wild, rollercoaster blend of football analysis, social commentary, off-color humor, and the crew’s sincere (if sarcastic) grappling with real-world issues. Whether debating the ethics of boycotting politicized businesses, roasting NFL safety protocols, or speculating whether our politicians are faking who they sleep with, “Holmberg’s Morning Sickness” reminds you: It’s not that serious, unless it’s about spitting—then all bets are off.

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Skip the commercials and non-content: The heart of the episode is in the sharp, fast-paced, and fearless talk among friends who are as quick to mock each other as they are the world.

Transcript

[A]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. Hey, what's up? It's Mo and my friends at the University of Advancing Technology has been ranked the number one best college for computer science for not one, but two years in a row. Which makes total sense because UAT are always on the lookout for those who don't just embrace technology, they live it. From advancing computer science and robotics to cybersecurity, gaming and artificial intelligence, UAT is where innovation thrives. So if you're ready to lead the next tech revolution, visit uat.edu mo. And don't just study tech, live it. If you're shopping while working, eating, or even listening to this podcast, then you know and love the thrill of a deal. But are you getting the deal and cash back? Rakuten shoppers, do they get the brands they love? Savings and cash back. And you can get it too. Start getting cash back at your favorite stores like Target, Sephora and even Expedia. Stack sales on top of cash back and feel what it's like to know your maximum, maximizing the savings. It's easy to use and you get your cash back sent to you through PayPal or cheque. The idea is simple. Stores pay Rakuten for sending them shoppers and Rakuten shares the money with you as cash back. Download the free Rakuten app or go to rakuten.com to start saving today. It's the most rewarding way to shop. That's R a K u t e n rakuten.com. you've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not evil. He's a bit rude. Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Friday short week. Got to Friday quickly. It's 5:45 this. It's the morning sickness. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett. There is no big Dick Toledo today. And we'll start the show off talking about what Brett just said off the air, which is, come on, guys, we're all in this together. Okay, you guys, we're the last radio show that really actually likes you. Like the rest of everything's trying to be a. You know, they're just. They're just trying to gather numbers. And we, like you now, like us back. Toledo's mother just passed away. He's on a plane yesterday to Montana. Back and forth to Montana for her death. For some Time with the stepdad and the mom arranging some things. Had to fly back here to get his stuff together, then fly back for the service, which is today. And he's doing work from his computer. He's actually right now doing a job. And yesterday started getting heat. I just. My first email because Brett said it. And then I just looked down my first email I read from yesterday. What's going on with the podcast. Another guy texts over to our text line or email thing and Brett says, hey, I'm waiting on the podcast. Like, Brady needs a kidney. Come on, let's go. The dude is at his mother's service. Give him a minute. He might be a little behind some stuff. Yes, yes. It is not professional. Yes, I know you're on a schedule and we need to stuff together. Work is work. Give him a second. It got up, right? Yeah. As far as I haven't looked part of it.

[B]

I didn't check.

[A]

Yeah. Please be patient. Someone will be with you in just a moment. All of our representatives are busy right now, but don't give this guy any guff about this right now. Come on. Although hilarious to compare your need of our podcast to Brady's need for a new kidney, because I agree what's up? So shut up. Of course it is. But I know it also disrupts.

[B]

Sounds good one's too.

[A]

We're so sorry. Let me say this. Yeah. Finally the important one got taken care of. How you doing? Look, I understand that and I apologize to all of you who emailed in yesterday complaining that the podcast was a couple hours late. We realize and we are incredibly aware that the death of Toledo's mother has drastically changed your schedule to a point where you needed to yell at someone. And we're sorry for the inconvenience of her death. It's just awful that you had to go through this. Toledo will be reprimanded right after his mother' funeral.

[B]

We'll call him IT.

[A]

We'll handle this. To where you guys don't have to bark about it. It's very. I find it very funny. Excellent work. Yeah. So thank you. And Richard, you're doing fine. Don't. And by the way, your boy's at it again. Toledo, do not start responding to them. You're in an emotional state. They're jackassen. Don't do it. They may have already done. I can't imagine what the sex are like of the Instagrams and stuff. Just. It's okay. When a parent dies sometimes. Look, it's a little bit our fault for not Stepping up. Yeah, you to do my mom's dead, you piece of. It's like, all right, he can't be. Look, this is exactly the comp. Did you see last night with the Eagles and Cowboys when you saw Dak Prescott go, what's your problem? And then Jalen Carter goes, the mother podcast is late, and he spit on Dak. It was nationwide problem. That's what it was. It was about the podcast. It was about the PODC removed his cheese. I tell you, this football being back was awesome. And boy, Brady's God, NBC, and everything else couldn't have ruined opening night more. Not a fan in the world has ever been. Well, in football. At least our football. Good football has been hit by lightning. And I loved the announcement. For the safety of everyone in the stadium, please move yourself to the concourse while the lightning goes by. They didn't just invent lightning like the.

[B]

Ones that finally worked their way into the concourse. 30 minutes. Took them a while to get in there.

[A]

They don't care.

[B]

Okay, back to the seats.

[A]

Don't care about the fans at all. No fan is. Look, they used to not care about lightning. This is a new thing. They never used to stop football games for weather back in the day, ever. It never mattered. Ever. We were kids.

[B]

They always. I mean, well, when you're kids.

[A]

Yeah. Because it's a wide open field, the.

[B]

Stadium, as far as I know, They. I don't know. I thought.

[A]

They always never stopped it for lightning. It's a recent. It's a recent thing. Like, within the last 15 years or so, it would have had to have been on the field to hit. They're worried that they're going to televise a nightmare which has. Oh, they would love that, though. Come on. In the end, they would love.

[B]

Which is surprise.

[A]

But they also would get sued because if your bosses have. You look, in this litigious world, if we are broadcasting outside and there's a lightning storm and Tripp goes, I don't care. Get the show out. And we're out there. Oh, absolutely. Play the spots. Yeah, yeah. We got to do the show in the lightning. We would absolutely do it. And then the lightning hits and we get smacked. We would sue. And they know it. And the NFL knows it, too. There's too much money. They're too big a deal that if somebody did have a problem with that. So it just tells me that in a few years. And it seems to always happen during Cowboys games, because last year, the Steelers and Cowboys got delayed for lightning. The Cardinals and Steelers got Delayed for lightning fears earlier. It always screws up the game, too. Like, nothing good happened right after that. But not a fan has ever been injured in a lightning storm, ever. They've said that, you know, back in the 70s, they're like, they might cancel this game. They never did it till they became a money machine. And of course, it's all about lawsuits and lawyers and whatever. And you know, who ruined this once, once again? Soccer. Soccer, the world's worst sport, ruined by far the NFL's pussy approach to weather, which used to be sort of part of it. Soccer players were standing on giant fields and the lightning hit the field and a bunch of them died. But if you ever watch the videos of where that happened, it was always in wide open fields and small stadiums, big giant stadiums. They're not getting hit by lightning if they do. Come on, what are the odds you get hit by lightning? It's just Dallas and Philly fans. Who cares? I was all for them standing out there getting hit by lightning. I have no issue with any of those fans taking one. It's just, it's. It was so in an hour delay, and the first 15 minutes were just in case lightning's nearby because it's within six miles of the stadium. And, you know, we know from our weather here in Arizona, if I recall, yesterday at this time, my weather app, which I, you know, I'm not going over to our weather center. It's. It's too busy in our building, whatever the plumbing and weather center we've got. Oh, my God. I don't know when we built it, but you hear about it. And our weather lady, Bo Yi Poon, I was talking to her yesterday and she said, you know, there's supposed to rain all day today, and then Friday, we're supposed to. It's just supposed to pour. That monsoon that rolled through a couple weeks ago, that was the biggest deal in years. Hour before that, I checked to see the weather, see if I get a little basketball in before. Sure. 0% chance of rain. Go right ahead. 0% chance of rain. We're going to be good. No rain till tomorrow. And then the biggest storm fair zone is we don't even know. So it was such a joke last night. It was a good game up until that weather thing. I'm like, man, this date weather stoppage in football, that's not football. We play through it all.

[B]

I like their guesstimates, though. It's going to be 30 minutes.

[A]

Yeah, well, they knew how long it was because they know when they see a storm that Actually exists. Like, it may come close to the stadium. It's within six miles. Ugh. And yes, it would be tragic if lightning hit the stadium. It's not what it is. Philly. Huh? It's Philly. I don't even think lightning wants to touch the ground in Philly. It's enough water there. Gross. Over there. Look at all the sky. Skywater's falling all over us. Let's go get us cheesesteak.

[B]

The storm cleared out about five minutes earlier because they were lobbing batteries at it.

[A]

Get out of here. Screw you in Santa Claus. Hey, we're over here in Philly right now, just standing in some sky water and just enjoying ourselves. Philly, Cheesesteak. By the way, we're all morons. Yeah, morons get morons. Fly, eagle, fly. I hate Philly fans, but I really hate traveling Dallas fans more. It's better that they would have taken a zap. But anyway, and I think maybe that's it. I don't ever. I even like when the Steelers games get delayed by lightning and storm. I'm like, come on. They used to practice in it. I remember Chuck Noel. Bill Cower used to have him over in Latrobe. It was pouring rain. We're going. We're working in this. Nobody gets hit by lightning. I'm sorry. That's just not a thing. You're running around on a golf course with metal and swinging big, and you're a wide open field and there's no sides. Yeah, that makes sense to me. Put some lightning rods on top of the stadium. This is easy.

[B]

You about nailed it. Cause that was the. 15 years ago was the first game.

[A]

Because that's when I started getting sued for everything about 15 years ago. They're like, oh, crap. Lawyers. Lawyers ruin every. How's our golf tournament? It was supposed to be last week. Oh, yeah, Lawyers ruined it. By the way, we have Hubbard's corporate lawyers on the phone once again. Let's do. Oh, yeah, they're wrecking something else right now. Yeah, they ruin. They're ruining the NFL with this kind of stuff. Yeah, it was about 15 years ago. They started to go maybe. And about 15 years ago is when that soccer player just fell down and nobody knew what happened. And then the whole team dropped because the field got struck by lightning. And it was a viral video. And nothing the NFL is more afraid of than watching a whole team drop dead because they weren't diligent with the.

[B]

I think it was baseball. Golf gets. They'll delay the tournaments there every now and then.

[A]

You know what I know wouldn't happen if they're down in Florida and a lightning storm's rolling over in February and it's the super bowl. They're not going to delay that for an hour. That's not happening. They'd rather have those guys die on the field than ever delay the commerce that is the Super Bowl.

[B]

That's why the opening and closing roof is the trend now.

[A]

Well, and that's lame too. Yeah, you need some stadiums that are open like the Bills are. Thank God the Bills did what they did. Brand new stadium outside. Minnesota blew it. They used to scare every used to be scary to go to Minnesota. Like Green Bay building a dome. Like the whole point of it is snow. Denver in a dome. So yeah, the lightning went through and they canceled the game for an hour. But the big story of the game last night was that dude spitting on Dak Prescott. Jalen Carter, which I gave it to Jalen or to Dak Prescott? I don't know. I don't get spit on easily and keep my cool. That, that to me is the ultimate insult and the grossest thing you can do. He didn't spit in his face which. But you spit on somebody and it is Dak Prescott. If I was in Dak Prescott's brain, Dak Prescott would have been kicked out too. I don't want to throw any punches with that giant dude, but I'm definitely going to get my team involved in spitting on me because I'm the quarterback and I know there'll be backup. There's going to be a scrum. You spit on. You spit on most men and that is going to be. That's the lowest you can be. And it's also the trashiest thing ever. And that dude blew it. And I liked what Chris Collins were said if the after he spit at deck he goes, one of his favorite players. He's one of my favorite players. He goes, but you might as well just spit on your coach's face and all your other teammates. That's the most selfish thing I've seen in a long time. And he couldn't have been more right. That, that, that is, it's, that's disgusting. If somebody came in here and we started to argue, that's one thing I can keep my comp. I'm a grown up. I don't believe that grown ups should fist fight when they have a disagreement. I find that to be incredibly immature and stupid. Like I don't like dudes. That's silly. You spit on me. It's an it is a lot for me to hold back a lot. It's Philly keeping it classy as always. Exactly. It's a classy group in the play. And you know, you stay in Philly, you get spit on every day. Yeah, you know you want that some more whiz on your cheesesteak there and to pour water in your mouth. Yeah, this guy's spitting all over my food and yeah, what a douche. But yeah, that was a. It was an interesting way to start the season. It kind of got off to a cruddy four seconds into the game. Got off to a cruddy start of the dude spitting on another. I've never had anybody spit on me. Actually I do a dirty, dirty. Jesse was it when I was 4 years old in Indiana was spitting off of his second story house at the backyard. And our baseball would go into it because it was in Indiana. There were no fences. Your yards were all attached by just open yards. Just love. I don't know what the that was. I was so happy when I'm. I was an Arizona boy before I even knew about Arizona. Put some goddamn fences up. Fences make good neighbors is a great sentence. But in Indiana we had just wide open, just houses plop down in the middle of stuff. You didn't even know where your yard ended. And we ran over and Jesse was up on his balcony. We wouldn't let him play baseball because he was a full out trash hillbilly. Like one of those kids in a movie you'd cast as he was the kid from A Christmas Story. The Scott Farkas. Yeah, he had freckles and his hair was dirty. He never had a shirt on. It was Indiana pride. He should be on the flag of Indiana future meth heads of America. And he said. And I ran over to get the ball. I was five, six years old. And I just felt this wad in the. On the top of my head. And I touched my head like what was that? And I look up and I just see hillbilly laugh with his tooth. And I realized he had just spit on me from his upstairs balcony.

[B]

Second story.

[A]

And of course you're five so you just go. You immediately start going into that weird cry where you. And I ran home and my mom went to his hillbilly parents house and you keep your boy out of our yard. They defended him because spitting on people is a thing they do. Then you realize, oh, trash spits on you. The world's worst human spit on each other. Oh, I see. And then I even like it in Porn. That's a new thing in porn. On pornhub, when they start.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Spitting on each other. And I'm like, no, this isn't sexy. I watched one the other day where a dude just goes, hey, hey. Well, he's banging and slapping a girl in the boobs. I don't think they like that, but porn makes you think they. They do. I've never hit anybody's cans. Like, have you? No. Like, just going right. Right in the middle. I just punch one. I mean, it's funny. I find it hysterical. Oh, yeah. You give them a spank cans. Yeah, that's a. Yeah, that's a dirty. You've been a bad girl. It's never hit anybody in the boobs. They're doing it in porn. Like, crazy guy goes, he's just banging away. Hey, hey. She looks up and he goes. And he kind of puts his lips in that little. Kind of pursed. And she goes. Opens her mouth and he just spits one in there. And I'm like, oh, what happened here? I can barely finish. So I scrubbed forward to her reverse cowgirl, and I closed the door. You can't spit on people. Reverse cowgirl. That's the way. Yeah. Hillbilly Jesse.

[B]

It doesn't happen more in spitting on each other. Baseball.

[A]

Well, accidentally.

[B]

So much spitting going on.

[A]

Yeah. It's not as much as it used to be, but they don't. Yeah. Because they're classier. Baseball guys are class. Anybody spits in baseball and you don't have a helmet to protect, you're getting punched. I think that's the bigger reason, is there's no, like, protective gear in baseball. You spit on a guy, you're wide open for that dude's fist. But spitting on it is. Yeah, Jesse spit on me. His parents defended him. My mom went over there. Like, I didn't realize. My mom is from Indiana and she's not a hillbilly. And she even thought, like, this is too far for even Indiana. Like, we're talking about Alabama. Hillbilly moved up to Indiana and made it even worse. But spitting and that from that day forward, I can remember that one. Spitting on human beings is just disgusting. That's what James says it perfectly. James McCarthy, you're right. Spitting on another person is universal. N word for all of humanity. That's exactly what it is. It's the line you do not cross. It's so gross. So, yeah, I have a feeling that old Jalen. It's assault. He's. Well, nah, they're not going to worry about that everything happens. Yeah.

[B]

If it wasn't. Be a football game, if someone does that. Oh, yeah, you can be in charge.

[A]

Yeah. I mean, you touch somebody, it's assault. We have a comedian friend who's. I won't name, who touched a kid at an airport and asked him what the hell he just said to him. And he grabbed his shoulder and turned around. They have it on video. And he's in trouble for assault right now. And all he did was to kind of grab his shoulder and say, were you talking to me? And they're like, you touched him. That's assault. That's battery. So, yeah, that kind of stuff gets. But again, you spit on me. I'm not. It's. We're not going to worry about what you just did. As far as illegal. That's. That's. A classy person would say that's assault, sir.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

A real human being just goes, that's it. I'm killing him. You don't spit on each other. It's disgusting. Yeah. This guy says, I am a Cardinal fan. I get the urge to spit on Dak Prescott, too, but you can't actually do it. And then for no reason, it says, f you, Bert. Nate Spitler is his name. The guy's even named Spitler. And he's not spitting on people. He's showing a little class, man. Mead says it, you check the Internet of the video going around. Dax spit first. Dax spit. This is true before people. They caught that later in the game. Dax spit from the huddle over the shoulder of one of his players towards Carter. And then he gave him a big smile. Now, whatever Jalen was doing close to the huddle is beyond me still. And the referee should have been like, why are you. Wait, why are you this close? Like, get. Get on the other side of the ball. And then he walked over, and then he spit on him. The difference is spitting close to a person. It's classless, but it's controlled. You spit on a guy, you've gone too far. And what Carter should have done is, like, said something. You spitting on me right in front of the ref. Is that right? You're gonna spit on me? And maybe the rest will be like, dude, spit on you? That's terrible. And then they kicked Dak Prescott out, but it was. It was gross. And, yeah, Dak did a. You know, He's. He's not Mr. Innocent in this. Even though he was spitting towards him, he didn't spit on him. Which is, if you're gonna do it, it's smart. Because if you're gonna be. If you're gonna be a spit weaponizer, don't spit on someone and then always have the excuse that you're like, I was just spitting, and the guy kind of walked towards it. Spitting is disgusting anyway. I do it a lot, but I do it most of the time. Not when I'm with someone. If somebody's walking along with me. I'm just, how you doing? What's up? It's gross. It's disgusting. So, yeah, that's. That's a fight. And I gotta. I'll talk to Jay up there at React Defense and Tactical Blast and be like, what do you do if a dude spits on you? Because it's gonna be like, that whole walk away thing is. Is in my brain. It's like, it's not worth fighting and finding out. The dudes a. You know, a 10th degree, everything. He's been super trained. He used to be a UFC fighter. He's got knives in his pockets. You just don't know who you're fighting. And the smarter thing to do in a situation is like, yeah, this is. I'm not fighting for my life. I'm fighting for pride, which is the dumbest thing you can do.

[B]

How many movies have we seen? The guy just takes it right in the face.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, you spit in somebody's face. Oh, and they wipe it off. Like, I would. I would. I'd be doing that. You know, hands flapping, says, okay, John, Eric from Philly here. Dax bitten Carter's direction intentionally first triggered him. Of course, NBC didn't show the angle of Dak until the end of the game.

[B]

Again, if you.

[A]

Because they hate the Eagles. Yeah, that's. All right. Let me. Let me break this out to you. Eric real quick says, like, our saying in Philly goes, no one likes us. We don't care. Love the show. You guys rock Philly. Water, Eric. Everybody thinks the networks hate their team. NBC doesn't hate the Eagles. NBC is not mad at the Eagles to the point where, like, don't show Dak. Let's make the Eagles look bad. If anything, they would love the soap opera in Dallas if Dak did spit on the guy. He spit, which is a common occurrence on the football field, towards him. It was weird. No, watch there. Brett's pulled up the video. It's not. Oh, that's after. And. No, no, no, it's coming up. That's. No, that's. No, no. They're gonna. They're gonna replay it. I see. Yeah. And Chris, that other Angle showed us that the umpire was looking back towards the cowboy. The jack spits a little bit. It's over the shoulder. It's definitely intentional there. But he didn't hit him. He didn't hit him. Yeah. Like, I spit at your feet. Yeah. I spit on your grave. Who was down with a knee injury. The same. You know, I like the.

[B]

The trainer hardly reacted.

[A]

Well, I. I think it's one of those things, like, did that just happen? Because that guy just spit on another dude. It hit him. Yeah. It's disgusting. It's. Don't spit on people. And look, there's movies. I spit on your grave. It's the ultimate insult. Yeah. Dak gave him a real kind of like. Yeah. An fu. Yeah. And NBC did show it. Eric, nobody in NBC is like, God, I hate these Eagles. What can we do to get some terrible press for them? They're.

[B]

Basketball game crushed it.

[A]

And the day's just getting started now. Kicking in with my crew when I.

[B]

Need a quick snack.

[A]

Go, Go, Squeeze Active fruit blend with electrolytes. Pouches are always in the starting lineup made with real fruit. And select electrolytes and. Mmm, so tasty. From workouts to hangouts to whatever's next. I go with Go, Go, Squeeze Active. Snag yours on your next store run. Available on Amazon. Holmberg's morning sickness. Carter spit directly on a guy. And by the way, that is not the way to retaliate. What he should have done is gone over. If he felt like he got spit on by Dak Prescott grabbed him by the face mask and kicked his ass. If he was going to do anything to get kicked out of the game, he. I look for spitting. That's punching to me that you. You get kicked out next week, too. Oh, now KUPD hates the Eagles, I see. Well, yeah. Yeah, I do. I absolutely hate the Eagles. I think that.

[B]

Will Dak get a fine?

[A]

No, he didn't do anything. He spit on a football field. Essentially. Letter of the law is he didn't spit at or on anyone. He may have in and, like, instigated a little bit of anger.

[B]

Yeah. That's why I'm wondering if they'll.

[A]

Well, no, all he did was stand in his huddle and spit over a guy's shoulder while Jalen Carter stood close to the huddle and he spit near him. I don't know why the ref wasn't like, get out of here. What are you doing? Over. What are you talking to them for? That was funny.

[B]

How many coaches are sitting around if.

[A]

You get spit On. Yeah. You spit back. Yeah. None. No one tells you that I would be the biggest baby. Oh, I might still have the same reaction I did when Hillbilly James spit. And James was mad because we'd always go because he had freckles. For some reason, somebody started to call him Pickle James. And then my sister started it, but she'd see him. She'd go, james, James. Pickle James never washes. Hit and, like, with, like, dirty jokes and things like it. Shut your mouth. James was so Indiana hillbilly. Once. My mom was backing out of the driveway, and you hear James go, look, look. And he had a cat by the tail, and he was swinging it over his head. Oh, cat's just going. And my mom's like this kid and wanders over, and I remember the window being down. And my mom's like, knock it off. Like, she tells him, put the cat down. And he goes, you ain't the mother of me. And then he runs off with the cat. I think it was his own cat. Is that cat gonna be all right, Mom? And my mom's like, no, it's gonna be in some sort of a weird white trash stew tonight. Yeah. Ah, this is a good one right here. This is the football talk I'm looking for. It says, I'm just surprised Dax spit. Cause usually he swallows. Excellent work. Excellent work. Andrew B. Exactly. Cowboys don't spit. They swallow. How dare you. Eagles. Anyway, end of the game, Eagles end up winning it. But the Cowboys should have. They had a chance. And CD Lamb ran around like he didn't have any arms at the end of the game, dropping every pass, which was awesome. I liked. No matter what happened, I liked it. The best thing that happened was the Eagles look like trash on tv. Check that box. I loved every second. Oops, sorry. Check that box. I loved every second of that. And. And the Cowboys lost the game. Two great events last night. The Eagles looked kind of shaky, and the Cowboys were losers in the end. All of it's good. And Dak Prescott got spit on. I mean, I don't like that, but. Yeah, if you're gonna spit on anybody, I hope it's the star.

[B]

Ten wins for the Cowboys this year.

[A]

I don't know. They've got an offense, but, you know, that game was weird. You can't really. Fences looked a little shaky. Well, especially the first half. Well, what's going on? Carter goes away. That's a big deal. Yeah. The Cowboys defense straightened up by the end of that rain delay. Changed everything. Yeah, both. Both teams looked like they didn't know what was happening in the beginning. And just walking down the field on each other. It was. Yeah, but it's football. And it's again tonight. Now you got it in Brazil with the Chargers and the Chiefs. And we got another one on a Friday night, which I'm fine with that. That'll fill my Friday. Tay. Tay go to Brazil? Good question. I don't know.

[B]

She time it. We're at a little concert that weekend, man.

[A]

Yeah, she's like a comedian. She picks up a gig when she goes to a town just to pay, like, to. To write off. Yeah. And pay the hotel bills. If I get a. If I get a job. Yeah. It's a. It's a. It's a strange kind of desire to push football on Brazil. But whatever this one says, I think Carter's leaving a lot of money on the table here. He could be the official. Hawk to a boy. Have a bitcoin and everything that comes along with it. Yeah, that's true. Hawk to a girl. Just talked about it. She didn't actually do. I'm glad I'm not in the modern age of BJ's. Cause I know I would have. I probably would have started crying. If anybody in my past would have gone, I'd be like, what the hell was that? You pig. Could you imagine anybody doing that to you? And that's all over porn now. Chicks just going. And then they go back in after it. You think I'm kissing you after that? It's bad enough my wang's in your mouth. Now you got loogies all over, and you're swallowing them in front of me, you pig. Yeah, I'm gonna. I'm gonna do some stuff in your mouth that's gross. You take a few swigs of water, and maybe you get a kiss. But for the most part, your head becomes like a nuclear power plant that's in meltdown mode after that. I'm not getting near it ever. Why do girls do that? Chicks, you need to. Women, you need to stop that. They always. And especially to younger guys. I remember. That was, like, the. The weirdest thing in the world. You're. You're getting your first few oral experiences, and it's pretty awesome. Oh, yeah. Even when it's bad at first, you're like. I don't know if those teeth are supposed to be involved, but this is pretty great. This is a. There's a real power move. We both are. We're both experiencing a power move here. She's got all the Power. But I feel pretty powerful with my wang in somebody's head. That's. That's like a flex on anyone. You think getting spit on is bad? Try that one. But then they always. After, like when especially young ones, they test you because they're like, that was awesome. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. We're not doing that right now. No, no, no. Do you know what I do with that thing? No, no, no, no, no. You don't want to kiss me. Absolutely. What are you crazy? Let me get past what just happened. Let me enjoy the moment. Is it me? You're wrecking it. Shut up and either get back down there or, like, look the other. That's where reverse cowgirl got invented. It keeps him from trying to kiss you. After that thing. Some guy had an annoying broad trying to kiss him afterwards. All right, all right. Turn it around. Turn around. I want to take a look at your butt. Move it, toots. Why don't you bounce around looking at that poster of Heather Thomas I got on my wall? I don't want to look at that. Well, I don't want you trying to kiss me anymore. I'm still getting over this. I'm new to this. And then years later, you're just like, yeah, whatever. And then your wives don't try to kiss you at all. So after a while, there's none. Most wives, unless you're a lucky fella, they're not going down there anyway. So the whole BJ to smooch ratio is zero after young girls do that, though. I remember that was my very first bj. There was an argument. It was fun. She was. She was crazy. Like, I. I hadn't even washed up. I think I just. She just went down there, and within a few seconds of having that thing in there, she had some emotional breakdown. Wanted to make out. That's not happening for a little bit. I don't know exactly what's going on with me down in that area, but I don't want to taste it. You're not gonna kiss me? No. And then she started crying. Is that all I am to you? Yeah. You didn't know that? Yeah. That's exactly why you're here. Yes. I just wanted to kiss. If you watched me. And they'll do it, too. Cause if that's the weird thing about porn, too, it teaches you that women like kissing over all of it. I watched Johnny Sins devour a woman's back door. She started asking for a kiss after. Not so sure you should want to do that right now. You should make him do that sip of water thing and, you know, kind of rest on that for at least two minutes.

[B]

He just cleansed the palate.

[A]

Yeah. Madison Ivy, like, begs for it. Lick it. Lick it. Kiss me. What's wrong with you? You're crazy in that. Oh, the amount of cranks. Oh, my God. Oh, yeah, exactly. Yeah. You gotta be like, the I10 tunnel. Traffic goes through that. She should think of herself. Yeah. Like, do you know what you're doing down there? Jesus. It's like licking a bathroom floor. You want to make out afterwards? Are you crazy? I've seen you in 14 videos with 14 different dudes and you want to smooch? You're out of your mind. It's like kissing a hooker. What are you thinking?

[B]

Hold that gum from underneath the desk.

[A]

Oh, man. Anyway, ladies, knock it off. You shouldn't want to get. It's a test. And we all know it's a test. Especially. This is for the next generation. Us older fellas look at it like, all right, we're over it. But when you're younger and a chick tries to. I remember my friend Mark told me about that years ago. And he goes, I hate it, because every time my girlfriend does that to me, she wants to make out afterwards. Like, I'm like, ugh. And he goes, we get in a big fight about it. His old girlfriend used to like to, like, snowball gulp. Yeah, but she didn't want to do that. But it was pretty darn close to that because she was still, you know, she hadn't washed it all out yet. Brady is not having a good time with us.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Blow jobs are against God. Blow jobs are against God. Stop it. You're not wrong, but quit it. Ladies. See what the Eagles Cowboys got us talking about? That's what classlessness is. They put us on death. Quit spitting, ladies. Swallow it. Yeah, for God's sakes, have some class. It goes for men and women. Swallow it. You think you're going to spit on a guy? Remember? What would Madison Ivey do? She'd swallow it, crying out loud. We can't normalize spitting. It's disgusting. Yeah, this guy Alex just said, I just had to pull over, man. I literally had to pull over because I laughed at the phrase, you feel pretty powerful when your wang's in another person's head. Well, it's true. There's a Zeus like feeling at that moment. And you gotta realize, as powerful as you feel, you're at your most fragile. You're walking on Legos, man. Something could go Horribly wrong. Any second now. You are risking it. If you start to flex a little too much. She'll remind you who's got the real power with one drag. Ow. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? We start off a classy way on a Friday. That's the way we work. As always, give it to us good and strong. 585-9-800, we'll scream it together. It's 98 KVD. Wake up. Hey, it's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this morning sickness. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. Smiles to know where. Sorry, I got posted. I had to get it out of my system. Or I just shouted it on the air. Had I had to. I had to Tourette's out a curse there real quick before we got it. This is kind of professionalism. You get around me, Brett. Start feeling that moment, you got to puke one of those big boys out. And I threw it out right as I turned the mics off. Off or. And then I've spun them back on. Gotta yell it. Sometimes when people are acting like that, you gotta say it. I think that's how it works. By the way, Jay from Tactical Black, who is a huge proponent of de escalation being the best self defense you could ever, like, put into your life. You're in a situation. Let's say Brett and I are at a bar. Guy comes over to us, gets Brett to bow up. You know, you've been looking at my girl's ass. And every guy's like, what's your problem? Like you. You immediately become. And you realize, no, let's not do this. De escalation is a huge thing. It's this. It's a guaranteed win. Your pride takes a punch. Big deal. But Jay even said you spit on me. All bets are off. Even Jay. That's a. That is a br. That. It's the universal bodily fluid. N word. He said, we have prison guards that have trained with us who are bit in fights and come down with hep C. The human mouth is the worst. Yes. Oh, that's a rough one. That's too far, man. Yeah, I'm with you. It is a hard time to walk away if someone spits on you. Still probably the smartest thing you can do. But damn it all. Tough. Walk away real tough. I'm going to get into something with you guys in a little bit that is more of a discussion about what should or shouldn't be done. And it'll be more of an opinion based thing. I'll tell you right now. It's not political, but politics are involved. All right. And I'm trying to, I'm trying to navigate this road. Okay, we'll get to that in a second. And it's really, it's tough for me. I'm. I'm struggling with this in a huge way. It's a huge thing. We'll get to that in a second. Otherwise, we're talking about the biggest news in sports. Caitlin Clark is out for the season. I'm kidding. I kidding. Nobody cares. Nobody knew she was out the whole time anyway. Anyway. No, the big news is Angel Reese was suspended. I'm just kidding. No one cares about any of the WNBA playoffs right around the corner. No one even knows who's in it. The league is a mess. When does their season end? I don't even know. I thought it was over. This is how badly run the WNBA is. You know, football kind of does well, wouldn't you say? I would say, yeah. Ratings have been the number one television show for the last 12 or 13 years. By far. Sunday night football has been the dominant ratings winner on television yesterday according to.

[B]

The, you know, researchers saying 48% of.

[A]

People are interested are checking this out. That's football. Huge. You have a product where half.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Of America are. Are actually actively interested and the other half is probably passively paying attention. You've got you. They have got us on a rope for football. So what's the WNBA do? Time their schedule, Their playoffs start right around when football gets going and a lot of their games are on Sunday afternoons. They are by far the dumbest group of business people I've ever seen in my life in the world of sports, unless you count this mix. Mike Tyson's gonna fight Floyd Mayweather in a few. I mean, come on. Did Mike Tyson not see his last fight with the YouTuber? He can't do it anymore. He almost fell down walking into the ring.

[B]

I was wondering if they're going to incorporate, you know, like is he going to do a one man show? Some of his standards.

[A]

I would much rather watch Mike Tyson recreate his Tony award winning one man Broadway show which was phenomenal. Hbo. I think he got an Emmy for it too because HBO did. Spike Lee directed and helped him with. It was a great show. And now this idiot 60 year old man keeps walking back into a Boxing ring with Floyd Mayweather, who by the way, when Floyd was in his prime made fights boring on purpose because he was a defensive gem. Go no further than watch. Floyd Mayweather went to Japan for an exhibition fight with a Japanese kickboxer and it's the most embarrassing thing you'll ever see. Floyd throws like a punch that wouldn't knock a three year old down and the Japanese guy throws himself on the ground and starts rolling around and Floyd raises his arms. I'm like, oh. Floyd Mayweather is in my opinion the greatest defensive boxer I've ever watched. That doesn't make for good fights ever. He makes someone look foolish for a few rounds, they get tired, they start chasing him around and he just jabs and taps and jabs until it's ready to put him away. He lets the, he lets the rabbit run himself out. He's had a few good fights, but not many. He's a great defensive fighter. He also is a thief. He, he, he knows how to fake. And Tyson's the same way. For a while there, Tyson wasn't dumb. He played the bad guy really well. He got a little out of control sometimes.

[B]

So the freak show happens. Are you paying?

[A]

No, I will not pay for this. I will not pay for this. No. I watched the Tyson Paul fight last year mainly for the spectacle. It was huge. It was in a huge stadium, it was a massive event. And I'm like, why? And the off chance that Mike Tyson landed a punch and I, you heard me here, like there's no possible way a 60 year old man. And it was like, you've seen him work the bag, you see him work the gloves, I'm good at that. I'm, I'm good at working a bag and gloves. You give me every day for a month and watch me work gloves, mitts, bags, all that stuff I'm going to be really good at. Doesn't mean I'm good fighting. In fact, I get my ass kicked most of the time by somebody a little better and definitely younger than me in a controlled setting. But I'm great on mitts, especially if I do it a lot. Mitt doesn't show you anything about boxing, but everybody was all enamored with Mike Tyson's training and training. He looks great. You go over to jabs, the women's boxing thing, you're going to see a few ladies in there, you're like, wow, then put them in the ring to fight. It's a different beast. You're not hitting any, nobody's hitting you back with Mitts, Nobody's hitting you back with a bag. You can still hit hard, but you're not afraid of getting hit. You can load up a little more. So I've never been the person that gets fooled by a training, you know, like, wow, he looks really good training. Hey, he looks good because that's what he's been doing all day. It's like, he looks great jumping rope too, but he's not going to win a jump rope championship. He's not all of a sudden that qualified to double Dutch for the world championship. He's a really good jump roper because it's part of his training now. Start to punch him while he's jump roping and see how he does. So watching Mayweather and Tyson try to steal your money and that's all this is, is going to be on us. This, this one has to be like what I'm going to call the last action hero. For a while there, Arnold Schwarzenegger could release himself on the toilet, just straining. In the late 80s, early 90s, he lay him in the can, Yay, yay. And for two hours we'd be like, arnold, Arnold. We loved action movies. I will kill anyone who tries to break into the bathroom and try to kill me while I drop the poopies. And then the last action hero came out. We're like, we're done with this. We hate this. Now. Now you're just. Now it was like he was like, I don't even have to have a script. I just show up. We do the songs, we do the dance, we leave. The little boy doesn't even have to be an actor. We just, people will come and we're like, we're done with you. That's the last one. And the last action hero was the one that killed the action movies because we, we as a group said, no more. This has to happen. This has to happen with Tyson, Mayweather, this has to happen. I got. Do not buy this fight immediately. And we'll probably advertise on the station because we have huge mail numbers and.

[B]

Like this, that's what I'm like. Is there an additional hook to this?

[A]

No, it's two names right now. It doesn't look like two branded names. We have established that the general public, especially 50 year old men, and I'm in that category. And guys, we need to talk. It's not impressive with one of our own, does something good in sports, it means the sport sucks. When a 50 year old man does well in a sport, something's wrong with the sport. Period. End of story. That's it. If you can't get young people to dominate, something's wrong with your sport. It's not good. So when a 60 year old boxer wants to fight, 59 and 48 wants to fight a 50 year old boxer, why two completely wildly different weight classes? It's just dumb and it's stealing. And please, for God's sakes, let's send a message as a group. We don't want to watch this. I don't want to watch old men doing much ever. I don't want to watch. Look, I play basketball in my backyard. I ain't selling tickets to that. Nobody wants to see that nightmare. I don't even want to film it. I can still shoot, but I'm still.

[B]

That's where I was wondering what the, the, the hook might be is. It's going to be a show, a series up until a fight where they're going to follow the training, you know, probably.

[A]

But don't fall for it. Don't fall for it.

[B]

Floyd had that, I mean, right?

[A]

You mean when he was relevant?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

And he had a show about like a real boxing match.

[B]

Man, this guy is talking smack.

[A]

And he was selling the fight beautifully because it had consequence. And it wasn't just they're going to.

[B]

Try to do that with this.

[A]

It doesn't matter if they win or lose. Nobody. If a 50 year old man beats up a 6 year old man, it's expected. If a 6 year old man beats up a 50 year old man, it's sad. Nothing good comes from this. There's no belts exchange, there's nothing good wwe. It's worse. The WWE at least admits their entertainment.

[B]

They're going, but there's enough. Now you got something.

[A]

If they go bare knuckle, I might watch because it's at least a little different. But I'm still not interested in old men fighting unless it's on the streets. The only time I want to watch old guys fight is in a parking lot at Circle K. Why? It's hilarious watching two old slow dudes try to fight. It's horrible. When two dudes are pretending they're professionals anyway, they're done. There's a reason you retire from the sport. You're no good at it anymore. Nobody retires from.

[B]

And it's only two minutes or less.

[A]

Which is mind boggling because if they're such professionals, they should hit the three minute mark. It's not easy to do two minutes. Go do two minutes of boxing right now and you'll make it through around 82. It's hard. But you retire from a sport because you're slow and old in your 30s, not because you're just like, well, I could keep doing it. I just don't feel like it. Some guys do. I know you'll throw Andrew Luck at me, but most of the time, and even you look at the roster of, you know, some of the teams, like even my Pittsburgh Steelers, I'm wearing the jersey today of cam Hayward, who's 36. He's old man Cam on the team and that's with Aaron Rodgers, who's 41. And everybody's laughing because the quarterback's 41 years old. He shouldn't be there, but he is. He might have one last hurrah in him. Maybe, but the odds are against it. It's a young man's game. Boxing is a young man's game. UFC does. It's a good thing about UFC is they're not dragging Rampage out anymore. You're 47 years old. You think you could take one of these kids Rampage like, No. I was getting my ass kicked when I was in my 30s by guys closer to my age. You think I got better in the last few years? I'm terrible. I'm old and slow. That's what happens to all of us. You may think you're still good at it. Tape yourself. You're old and slow and that's why there's age divisions. Brady doesn't play tennis against 20 year olds. It'll be a disaster. You go out there and play guys your age. Yeah, of course you do. That's stupid to try to play people who aren't. So please do not for the love of God pay for this fight. You can't do it it and I guarantee you something weird's going to. Here's my prediction. And this will be proof that it's all. Something weird's going to happen leading up to it. Like something. No, won't be an injury. It'll be something strange where Mike Tyson knocks out Deon Deontay Wilder in a sparring match. That's what I'm saying. This is WWE scripted now. It's ridiculous.

[B]

There's enough that you can hook.

[A]

Absolutely. Because of the names dumb Americans themselves. Jake Paul, you're right. Makes $70 million. He's not a fighter. Holmberg's morning sickness. He's still better than Tyson at 60. And the dude's an off the street guy again. I told you back then last year. Mike Tyson's last fight 15 years ago was against a guy named McBride. Kevin McBride, I think was his name. He got his ass kicked by this dude badly, and he was a horrible journeyman fighter. It was designed to see if Mike could still even stand in the ring with someone. He got his ass kicked badly by a doughy white dude who couldn't make his mark in boxing if everybody threw their fights. He was terrible. You think 15, 16 years after that, Mike Tyson's like, well, I found the magic again. No, you got worse. Floyd Mayweather's last few fights, horrible, because he knew, I'm not as quick as I used to be. I may not have this, but I know how to defend. And he didn't fight, he dodged, and he wore a dude out by letting him punch him. How old's Floyd now? 48. 48. And Floyd's still athletic, but he's not in the game. But he's 48. There's a reason he's not in the game. He's smart enough to know that it's just not beneficial to him. I never like when old people are good at stuff. Ever. An old man good.

[B]

Spent the cash. He spent more cash, Floyd, or why.

[A]

They'Re doing more money. I'll tell you right now. Mike Tyson has. Floyd Mayweather's been actually fairly smart with his money, outside of bailing himself out of things for rape and like. Like jail stuff.

[B]

Because I thought this, the last Paul fight for Mike might have just.

[A]

The last. The last fight.

[B]

Mike Cruz, for a little bit.

[A]

Well, it brought him back to zero, I think. Yeah. I think Mike. Mike's blown a lot of money. He's real big into the weed thing now. Yeah, he got into some good investing. Yeah. Yeah. And he's an old man pothead. This is like Cheech and Chong having a boxing match. Come on. I don't want to watch it. Hey, man, I'll fight you, man. Come on. And we're supposed to be excited for this. No, no, it's not a thing. Another thing I wanted to talk about that I actually love. Pete Buttigieg might have been faking it. Do you see that?

[B]

No.

[A]

Tucker Carlson has gone out of his way to claim that noted homosexual politician Pete Buttigieg is actually straight. And another guy has backed him up, saying, oh, yeah, straight as an arrow. He's faking it for political gain. And I am appalled. Who would do such a thing, faking being a homosexual just to get away with stuff? That's insanity. There's a guy named Michael Knowles that's saying Tucker Carlson isn't crazy because Tucker said that Pete Buttigieg is fake gay. He's doing the thing. He's heard it from a gay friend that Pete told him, I'm not really gay. I'm faking it. And he's, like, been with women and stuff. Tucker's podcast, he said that Pete's faking it for political gain. And Michael, this other guy, says that he takes Pete at his word that he's gay, but he's got no problem amplifying the idea that Pete's full of it because he kind of avoids the whole topic. Like, I don't want to talk about it too much. There may be. And I'm not saying I know one way or the other who's right or wrong. I know what I'm rooting for is that Pete Buttigieg faked it the whole time. I think that would be hilarious. Pete wants to run for president, right. And there's pictures of him with his friend Chaz. Pete and Chaz, they're like a couple, but it's a Chuck and Larry situation, possibly, that they could be, like, faking it for the gains. And I don't know, Brad, I don't know if you've ever met anybody who's fake being gay so he can get away with stuff, but that person is a Polly man. I don't know. Gotta think about that one. That is gay hand Jewish. How does that. Oh, my God. Could you imagine who would have the gall running around saying, they're a gay Jew. That's a slap to the star and the rainbow Howard Stern wannabe. Exactly. That's all that person would be, is just some shock jock. But if he's faking it, that's a whole lot worse than when I did it, because he's actually been in really important positions. I'm a jackass for a living. It's okay for me to do it. Dudes in Biden's cabinet, and he's, like, running the Department of Transportation. And, I mean, he could make tons of mistakes. And you can't really get too mad at him, especially when he was doing it, when everybody was on eggshells about political correctness. You're like, the gay guy just screwed up the entire freeway system with something he did. And it's like, what a dumb. Can't say that. Oh, yeah, yeah. Don't yell at him or anything. He'll, you know, get in trouble with the LGBTQ people. You don't want to just ignore it. Ignore it. Pete's sitting back, laughing, smoking cigarettes. It's the biggest thing I've sucked on in a while. So Pete's straight then? Apparently. Possibly. I'm not making that claim. Tucker Carlson made it. Now people are backing it up and saying maybe Pete's faking it. I know what I'm rooting for. It's all I'm saying. Next thing you know, they're going to say Big Mike's real name is Michelle. I mean, come on, what's going on here? Yeah, let's get to the real brass tax. Who's faking what around there.

[B]

Have to have a press conference.

[A]

Prove it. Yeah, I'm gonna have to ask you to suck on this, Mr. Buttigieg. I would, but I just. My boyfriend would. No, no, no, no, no. You got to prove it to us, Mr. Buttigieg. Please, for the sake of the American people and the office that we hold so dear, suck that right here on TV and prove it to us. And then he would do it. People like, he's terrible at it. He's never done this in his life. He reminds me of my wife.

[B]

We have gay experts on right now.

[A]

He uncomfortable around the ball sack. I say not gay. I am praying this gets legs and Pete has to go on TV and prove he's gay. I am dying for this to be real. Thank you, Tucker Carlson, and your weirdness for making this even a thought in my head. Cuz if it, we win no matter what. But as an audience, and I'm telling you I'm here for the laughs. I don't care about politics anymore at all. I'm here for the laughs. There's nothing we can do. We can't be all in an uproar constantly over what Trump said, what the Dems did. I know. I hate half of them here and I hate half of them here. Some ideas are okay. They'll screw it up somehow. But if one of them faked gay and we caught him and we have to have him prove it and he either does or doesn't, who's the winner in that?

[B]

Every time we see him out, he's dressed like Captain Fantastic.

[A]

Yeah, he's got his. He's got a bow on. He's got a ramp up the twink to proceed. If I was straight, would I wear this feather boa? No, probably not. We still need you to see. We still gotta see you give a hand job or something. And not to yourself. One of those over the top jobs to the dude next to you at a movie theater. Well, that's just uncouth. Come on, come on. Come on. Come on. We need to see it. It. I've said it for years. One thing the American people hate in unison besides the WNBA is being fooled. We do not like being fooled. It's universal. And if you pulled the wool over our eyes and we were nice to you about something and you'd find out that it was fake, we're gonna make you prove it. And this is one I want to see proven on stage. Where are the big winners here? Oh, I want to see it. I don't know. You look a little uncomfortable around the ball sack. I'm afraid I'm gonna have to ask you to take in Sir Gulp. I just. I. And just have a doctor come out later. The way they do Trump all the time. It's like we don't think he's healthy. And then that weird doctor comes out. This guy is like a.

[B]

Like a center further examination.

[A]

He's like a half man, half mule. He's amazing. And the doctor comes out like, we need somebody to go investigate Pete Buttigieg's back door. And Tucker Carlson was right.

[B]

The doctor comes out and just said, you just hear him as platinum.

[A]

Yeah. Not using it. Or his boyfriend's got a micro. That's what we've just. We the viewing audience win this argument and this battle all day long. It. Should it matter? No. But he made it matter. We're the ones who get involved in whether or not people are gay or not. I don't care. But if you say you're gay and you lie about it, I need to know. You're the Rachel Dolezal of BJ's.

[B]

Usually. Usually they do a little expose on their life. And here's what it is. Outside of politics.

[A]

Took my first crank. I can make it box. I can make that look super easy. The only way to prove it is one way, Brady. There's only one way a straight man with everything on the line who's been fake and gay can make the American public rest easy. You got to take one of the trunks on TV for us. Paper. I don't want to see Floyd and Mike fight, but I'd pay 60 bucks on a Saturday night to watch Pete Buttigieg prove it to us. It's like a Black Mirror episode. And I absolutely love that this is in the ether. I don't. Look, don't email me your side and all the other stuff. People hate being fooled. And if Pete pulled this off, and frankly, I'm rooting for him to having had faked it because I'd like to See him break down and apologize for it. That would be amazing. Jussie Smollet still hasn't said he's sorry for and he's. He's digging his heels in. I got video footage of him with the dudes that he hired to do the thing to him, and he still says it was an attack. You know, he's O.J. simpson without the murders. It's Rafael Palmero about exactly screaming at Congress. I look at you pointing his finger. I never did this. You sons of. And they're like, oh, here's a video. You're doing it. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. Nevermind. Besides that, I never did it. Besides that one video you got of me. Oh, yeah, yeah, exactly. People hate being fooled. But if Pete Buttigieg is straight and he's gonna still, like, I'm hoping this goes crazy. This erases the Epstein's to me. I don't care what happens after that. That's still entertaining. There's too much going on there. This is a one on one moment. He's got to take Chaz deep. Sorry, it's just the tip. We're not impressed. Can you take the whole thing or not? Pete, look, if you want to be president, you got to do this. I try to go down to the balls, I guess. All right, Would we be satisfied if he went balls down things if we go balls deep? Well, we'll leave you alone about this, Mr. Booty Judge. They made such a big deal out of it. He's the first gay. This in the cabinet. He's the first gay. They're the ones who made a big deal. I've never known who's blowing who when it came to the Department of Transportation, ever. I remember Trump put an Asian lady in charge of it, and I got nervous for a little while. Well, yeah. I mean, come on. That was the only time I actually knew who the Department of Transportation person was. When I saw a lady go, oh, Ross, be safe now. Like, oh, no, he poon is there. I take care of buses. Oh, yeah, you will. Just get behind the wheel. You'll take care of all of them.

[B]

But couldn't he, I mean, really, in a way combat it by saying, you know, I was gay, now I'm no longer gay.

[A]

I don't know, you got a lot of political gay.

[B]

And I didn't want to change it because what does it matter?

[A]

I'll tell you this right now, that gets him blown up by everybody, including the lgbtq. Because that's a poor choice of words. Later, maybe it was Freudian because the LGBTQ people would come after him going, it's not a choice. You can't just choose not to be anymore. So the best case scenario is he comes out and says, I'm bisexual, which I don't believe. Second, you're eating another dude's mayo. The word buy is dropped from your resume. That I stand by. That should be on a coin that should be on the bottom of our money. D OT do us or whatever we got for Arizona State. Now that what I just said should be a state motto. The second you take another dude's mayo, the buy gets dropped from your resume. That's the great State of Arizona, 1912. But if he's faking it, I know I'll be thrilled. Hilarious. And I like that this is a thing, because he did benefit off of that. Joe Biden hired him, screaming out, I'm going to have a diverse cabinet, and he's a white man. He wouldn't have gotten the job from Joe if he wasn't gay. Fact. Joe wasn't just hiring random whites for his cabinet. He made a point to say, there's gonna be a gay guy. There's. Remember that dude that was in the lipstick and the red dress that started stealing stuff from the airport? He was like a nuclear physicist. Joe appointed him to stuff. Until he started swiping bags out of the Dulles and still have that admiral. Right? Or Justin says, this is not the classiest way to ask me this, John. What do you think gets bigger ratings? Tyson versus Floyd or Pete getting bf'd for proof? Oh, I know the answer to that. Pete. Pete. It's gross. Yeah, I think we got to do, like, DNA swabs inside and out on the guy. And if it's real, then it's still hilarious that he had to prove it. If it's not real, it's hilarious that now he's got to explain himself. It's the best. Remember that congressman that said he was walking the Appalachian Trail for, like, a week and really just took that plane down to Brazil to nail that check?

[B]

Yeah. Yeah.

[A]

Honey, I'm gonna be gone. How long? Six or seven days. And I'll be in the woods, so there's no chance you could call me? Or I can call you. So bye. Okay, I guess that makes sense. Bye. He gets on a jet and flies down to South America and hammers the life out of a chick and comes back dirty. He rolled. The best part of that story was he rolled around in the. In the woods after he got back from the Airport before he went home. He had to. He probably ran and got some sweat. I bet you in the car he had the heat all the way up, so it looked sweaty. And then he rolled around in the dirt.

[B]

I forgot how he got caught.

[A]

It was because the girl told on him.

[B]

Didn't she call?

[A]

Yeah, the chick down there said something like, he's not in the woods. He's banging me the whole time. And then he had to go up behind that podium and his wife standing behind him for a little bit. It wasn't really in the woods. Everybody. It's like everybody went ooh. As being a hot side piece down there. I met her in Central America. I don't even know how this happened, but. And the first question, couldn't you come up with a better lie than, I'm gonna just walk in the woods for six days? Doesn't that seem suspicious? Wife seemed to eat that up though, so got to give me credit for it.

[B]

It's been two years.

[A]

Yeah, I've been doing that a lot, actually. Been. If you make a habit of the walking in the woods for six days, your wife seems to be like, he goes to the woods a lot, always comes back dirty. So it must be real to one.

[B]

Of her friends are like, really?

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

For two years.

[A]

Again. Was he Kane from Kung Fu? Just walks the earth.

[B]

Needs time. Time alone.

[A]

I guarantee it happened too. He'd go like, I'm gonna go walk in the woods. And he'd leave for six days and come back all dirty. She's like, how was your walk? It was great. And like a couple days later, he's in bed with that wife of his and he tries to make a move on her and she goes, stop it. I'm bloated. And he lays there kind of pissed off. And then tomorrow I'm gonna go back to the woods.

[B]

I need time.

[A]

I'm gonna go back to the woods. Probably five day trip this time into the woods. Okay, you just got back from a little. I think I dropped my watch or something. I gotta go look for my watch. Can I come with? Hell no. I'll be in the woods. It's my time to think by myself for a week. All men do it. You should see it. The woods are loaded with us. It's men wandering all over the place. Appalachian Trail is not little. I want to see it all. And he got caught. And he never once stood behind the podium and said what he should have, which was, you guys don't think it's kind of impressive that I did this? For two years, boys. It's a hell of a lie. And you know how much work had to go into it. I was sneaking onto the airport, I was like Al Qaeda. And another question should have been, could you find some local ass, at least in the Appalachians? Like, you couldn't have kept it where you didn't have to fly to it. Probably, but ever seen a Brazilian's ass? He makes a good point. That's a good point. Hey, I just want to thank my love, the love of my life, my wife. She'll be getting a nice ring. Big four carat deal. I gotta pay for this.

[B]

He.

[A]

Kobe's it. Yeah, he has to. He's gotta save it. But we love that one too, even though we forgot about him. Anthony Weiner. We love these dudes that go out and go, I'm a family man. I do this, this and this. And then the next thing you know, there's dick is on a little phone screen. Some 20 year old girl's like, he's been doing this for a while. Oh, my God.

[B]

Wide stance at the airport bathroom.

[A]

Oh, that guy is my favorite one. He's trying to tap toes with the dude in the stall next to him, see if he could get a random BJ at Minnesota's airport. Then he went on TV with his wife crying, how do I do it? I know why you do it. You love the D. You can get jobs for it with the Biden administration. Anyway, I got my fingers crossed. I'm praying to Brady's God. Everything all right? Goddamn approval stuff. He's trying to get his email, ask for an approval. Right in the middle of it. Anyway, trying to get the. I understand. You get all the people contacting and the thing shuts you down in the middle. It's a terrible system. Thanks for being so diligent. Brett does not like technology. No, this is ridiculous. All right, here's my dilemma. And I need this to be something you guys solve. So Halloween's coming up. The Halloween show. October 31st, doing it at Desert Ridge, Night of the Singing Dead. It's on a Friday or Saturday, I don't remember which, but it's on a weekend. So Halloween's gonna be awesome.

[B]

I think it's a Friday.

[A]

It is okay. Doing it on Halloween, which will be great. The big party and the Fun will be October 31st. So usually about this time of the year, I start going through ideas for what I'm gonna do for a costume and I have to order from a company. No, from a company that does prosthetic. Stuff Now. Last year, it was awesome. It's like these rubber masks that are. They feel like skin. That. My makeup lady, and she's available to all of you, by the way, Amy Domey. Look her up. She's outstanding. And if you've seen our Halloween shows, you know that the. It's movie magic what she does. She is ex. Excellent. And I sit in that makeup chair for a few hours at a time, and I really enjoy, like, the. Like, it's fun. So she sends me some stuff, and I start looking at the things that are possible. And it's a website of a company, and I'm not going to give the name of the company yet because I got to hear from what you guys think. And I go on their Instagram page and I'm like, oh, that's awesome. So I fire, like, a picture of that back to Annie. Could we do something like this? And there's chest pieces that kind of glue on, and it looks like human skin or bones. Makes you look like half your head's missing. Like, there's all sorts of really cool prosthetics. So I'm going through their Instagram page, and in the middle of their Instagram page, they say, sorry, we can't do a certain thing. We're a very small company, so we can't afford that. I'm like, oh, that's. I forget. It was just something minor where someone was asking for extras, and they're like, can't give those away. We're kind of a small company. We can't do. Oh, oh. It was. Some influencer was asking them, can you give us free samples if I give you a push on my thing? Is it. We're not. We're too small to give things away. We need the money. We're just a little company. I'm like, oh, that's a classy way to handle it. Two posts later on their Instagram page, it says, keep in mind, this is a small company. They don't have a ton, evidently, of money. They throw out a post that says, if you support Trump and his cruel cabinet, delete us as a follower. We won't change your mind, and you're not going to like it here anyway. I'm a big believer and giving people money who deserve it and stuff. I'm not a Trump supporter, but I'm also not a person that believes you're a smart business for telling half of an audience to go away. Take it from Howard Stern. He did it, and his audience dwindled to 125,000 people. People don't like being told. And here's the problem. Okay, so it's Trump. Big deal, right? You vote for Trump. You don't vote for Trump. What about you? Find out. I have a belief that you don't agree with. Can we not do business again? Yeah. Do I give this company my money? Now, keep in mind, some of these prosthetics are like a thousand bucks. This is a good chunk of change. If it said Biden or anything else, I'd feel the exact same way. I don't like anybody who says, my business is small, we can't do anything for you, and then says, unless you believe exactly the same way I do. I don't want you to follow us or be part of my business. I kind of want those businesses to go out of business. Because isn't that in a weird way, saying no blacks allowed? More or less, In a weird way, isn't that the exact same thing?

[B]

Go away.

[A]

They do incredible work. Look. But if they've got this opinion where they're going to cast off people for having a different thought process, do I still give them my money? Would you.

[B]

I'm looking for another company.

[A]

Would you?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Would you? I'm with Brady. All right. That's kind of my dilemma. That's where I was sitting on that. I just. There's other people that do the same thing, though, so it's not like they're the only company in town.

[B]

A little bit of a pain trying.

[A]

To find, oh, these guys are especially good, I'm sure. But I can't believe that there's not another company making prosthetics like that. Why is it bad to take somebody's money that disagrees with you? Why?

[B]

I don't understand. Well, it's just confusing. I mean, I know that the passions are obviously there on the belief system, but you're just turning down someone because you're a small company.

[A]

Yeah. You shouldn't turn anybody down.

[B]

Then why you. Are you looking to get out of the business? Because that's a pretty good plan right there.

[A]

You vote red, he votes blue. Everybody's money votes green. Everybody's business votes green. Like I always say, vote with your dollar. Yeah. I mean, you know, come on. Their post, underneath that, their comments said, if you don't treat folks how you like to be treated, you are not welcome here because of your lack of humanity. And, you know, I'm not a staunch Trump supporter by any means. I don't care for a lot of the things he does. There are Some things I really like that he does. Same thing can be said about Biden. Although I will say that side of the aisle has gone insane. And their ideas that used to be good are now just seemingly lash outs. So I think they're a little lost, and I think their own. If you can't admit that. I definitely think the Republicans are a little bit lost, but at least they've got a direction. They may not like it, but at least they're focused on something.

[B]

They're not as gay as they say they were.

[A]

Right. And then you get into that. Is Pete running this company? Is this his new buttigieg.com? i'm struggling with this, though, because I don't know where my money goes most of the time. But if you announce it, then I have an opportunity to make a decision. So if you announced, like, you know, if you voted for this person, you can't eat our food. All right, well, I don't like that. And I didn't vote for the person you're talking about, but I don't like that. I don't like setting that standard because that's just not what we're supposed to be doing. And I thought maybe that would fall under like. Like a silver go.

[B]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, well, this is what I need, right?

[A]

I know there's stuff that good. It's like when Chick Fil A hated gays. Even gays were like, we gotta eat those waffle fries. Even Pete Buddha judge was there. I think that's what they like. During that whole crisis, Pete was eating there every day. I'm like, is he really gay? Isn't it like the. The gays that were suing that bakery? Yeah, because they wouldn't make him a wedding cake. Right. They said it up front. You know, okay, fine. Why would you give them your money? Right. Yeah. I don't care how great that cake is. Exactly. If they don't like you, why would.

[B]

You want that cake being made?

[A]

Right. Yeah. Announced. Because I've had taken the stand on people who scream out, if you did this, I don't want to be your friend anymore. And I'm like, I'm. I don't want to be anybody's friend who says that. If you can't see past anybody's differences.

[B]

That happen a lot.

[A]

That's. To me, that's the exact same thing as saying, I don't interact with blacks. And if you do, I'm not interested in you either. It's the same mentality. It may not be the same target.

[B]

I hear That a lot with families. Like, I don't talk to that cousin anymore.

[A]

Yeah. Because politics ruined it. Yeah. Ridiculous. And I understand if it causes conflict in person, you know, I get that. But if you just basically say, oh, Brady's a good friend of mine. I like him a lot. And somebody goes, who did he vote for? Nevermind. We're not. I don't want to know you. Yeah. Like, if you're not even going to give this, it doesn't matter. He's still a good person. He's still fun. He's nice. I like him. Him. I know. Honestly, I think I know who you voted for, but I. We don't talk about it. It's not something. Brady, who did you vote for? Run it down the line. Because if it's. If anything's different on that page, you're out. You'd be like, I don't want to work for you. I don't want to work here. It doesn't make sense.

[B]

So some of it, you go down the list and like, well, I like this name better than the other. I really didn't know this judge. And the voting.

[A]

I don't know any of the judges.

[B]

Like, and then, oh, I'll just pass.

[A]

I didn't know you could skip it. So I used to always just sit there and labor over each judge. My name. Yeah. Oh, I did. Dean Martin got my vote every time. Or even the only one. I don't even know what he was running for, but Dean Martin, I'm in. I voted for D. Martin.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Brand. It's Brand. Loyal. Yes, absolutely. I know this guy. Everybody. How you doing? Hey. Guilty as charged for being hot as sin. I love this one. I plead insanity. Up there. I'm drunk. Your honor, please. Look, I'm Dean Martin. I get away with anything and the moon hits your eye. Court adjourned. I'm bored. Uh, this one says, yeah, John, the plight of the MAGA crowd is the exact same as the civil rights movement. Incredibly succinct point you made there. I didn't say it was the exact same. I don't know if you're yelling at me or if you're giving me credit. I didn't say it's the exact same. It's not the plight of the MAGA movement either, either. It's the tribalization of thought that you can't even. You're so weak, you can't do business with somebody because what if they're just wonderful people who happen to have different political views? Is that possible in that. In the Mind of this company. It's like, they're amazing human beings. I hate their politics and they don't lead with it.

[B]

Bottom line. It's disappointing.

[A]

Yeah. Because I really like their stuff and I've bought it in the past, but I don't. I don't really want to. I would do it the other way. So if you're yelling at me about the plight of the mogger, I do it the same way. If you're like, if voted for Biden, I just think that's dumb. And I don't want to give money to people who are thought policing customers. Especially when you say you're a small company just trying to make it. You can't afford to give away to influencers. You should be taking every dollar that comes in. It doesn't matter who it's from. It's weird. And it's the. Yeah. And it's odd because it comes from the group who are screaming about tolerance and acceptance. Acceptance.

[B]

Does the owner know that? The person.

[A]

I don't know. I don't know if it's the owner who does it.

[B]

I know if it's. It sounds like it's small, that the person's doing everything.

[A]

Yeah. I don't know. I'm struggling with it because I'll tell you this, the struggle is really because as a guy who's in the middle and gets crap for that, like, people want me to be one way or the other. And I'm like, well, some good ideas on both sides. I think they're both nuts. I think you got inmates running their asylums over there. Like, if you thought Biden was good, you're wrong. If you think Trump is good, most of the time, you're wrong. He does good stuff sometimes, though. And so did Joe or whoever was signing things. That pen of his. I don't. Who knows? Hunter did. Yeah. Maybe some stuff happened that was good, but.

[B]

But then I can. You know, I can also understand, like.

[A]

Well.

[B]

I'm still gonna buy the stuff.

[A]

Yeah. It's kind of where I'm at because it's so good. And then I gotta search and what if I find a company that's not as good, but they're like, they'll take your money. I don't know. They're so good. Their stuff is so good and it's comfortable. That's the worst part is, like, their stuff is light. You glue that crap all over your face. The last thing you want is it slipping or being heavy, and you don't even know it's on on it's so good that the next day sucks because taking it off is hard because that it just melds onto your face. And some of the stuff we've done for those Halloween shows have been high end, like super costumes. There's been a few that I'm like, in that chair for a long time. Anyway, we'll do it again. So you're saying, stop, don't do it. You wouldn't do it.

[B]

That's enough to. Yes, weigh me. It's like, why would you do that?

[A]

Best barbecue ever puts up a sign that says, you can't have our food. If you voted for yeah, Biden, you'd stop. Go to number two. I don't know. Food's different. Yeah, if Brady's saying it with food. Come on. I don't believe him. He's in a life crisis with food right now. We can't really talk to him about. He's wearing a shaky pizza. Yeah. Yeah, he's got a shaky pizza. He's gonna eat that shirt before he's not allowed to pizza it. Morning sickness medicate K H's morning sickness. So it's tough for him. He's in a transcendental. Like, this is a. This is a moment. This is like his menopause.

[B]

I'd like to say. I'd like to think. I would. I know I would. If the best. I mean, if you're saying the best barbecue, like, if we turn around and all sudden someone like, stake 44 ocean 44 comes out and says this.

[A]

Yeah, you can't do this unless you voted the same way we did. I am out. Yeah, I think. I think I am. All right. I think you made up my mind. I agree with Tyler. All politicians are awful. Left, right, up, down. It doesn't matter. They don't care about you. That's why they're politicians. Exactly why they got into it. How those inner cities looking, those politicians that always promise they're going to clean them up. Ever? No, never once. Okay. Yeah. That's all you need to know. Joseph says that company is practicing bigotry. That's what I think, and I don't want to look. And that guy that emailed might be mad at me. I couldn't really gauge it off the email. I'm not comparing MAGA to the civil rights movement, but I was against the idea of the civil rights movement. I wasn't alive then, but when I see it, I'm like, why not let people announce they don't like blacks? If I was black, I'd Want to know if the people inside hated me before I ordered a burger from them? If they had a sign that said no blacks allowed, I'd take my family. Like, we're not going in there. I'll spit all over our food there. And now. Thank you for letting us know. So. But this is a different one because it's kind of still discriminatory, but in a weird, like, acceptable way. I don't know. Let's just get back to whether or not. See, and this is the thing. You're not. You're not helping. But it is funnier. That says, all right, Holmberg, Those libtards, don't give them your green money. They can go to Russia and get some money if they want to be communist Nazis. All right, that's not helping. That's not an adult way to be funny. That is funny, though. Let's get Pete on the pole. For God's sake, can we just have some fun again? Nicki says it's a new Christmas gimmick. They have elf on a shelf now. Pete on a pole. There you go. That's the way we work things around here anyway. All right, so I've made my choice. I will not be ordering from that company. Damn it. I got good stuff. Michael Jordan caught crap for the that in the 90s. He was right. Republicans spend money, too is what he said about. They tried that with him back in the 90s. Like, you're give a political statement. He's like, no, it'll screw things up for my business. That's terrible. Republicans spend money, too, And I'm selling shoes. That's all I'm doing. Like, you don't need to know about me that way. I sell shoes for a living. That's pretty much what I do. You never do that when you. Like they made Michael Jordan doing. He's a shoe salesman. You never go over to the Tom McCann and one of the guys like, what are you? 12. But before we move on, who the hell did you vote for? Shoe salesman. Huh? And he's not asking me either. We're just selling shoes. Anyway, didn't he say it was. It's not about black or white. It's about green. Yeah, he said that several times. But his big quote in that thing was, republicans spend money, too. I don't want to piss him off. They're like, coward. Look, I kind of just told you I'm a Democrat. And can you read between the lines on that statement? I think he won. I think Michael and look, that's how you win. He kept his political beliefs to himself for the most part. Not really. We knew. But he didn't go screaming don't buy my shoes if you didn't think like, I think it's dumb more than anything else. All right, Brady, I'll follow your advice and I'll get it. I'll get some cruddy stuff from some crap company that voted for Halloween's open right now. You're fine. Yeah. Spirit Halloween never has the sign. It's a spirit Halloween. Unless you voted for Trump, then get out. They wouldn't make any money. There you go again. Tribal. This is what it says. I bet if you order a mask that makes you look like you have down syndrome and ask for a MAGA hat on it, they'll do it. That's actually pretty funny idea. Maybe if you order that their mentally mask it comes with a MAGA hat from them, which I would find hysterical if they're going to go to that great length. But anyway, I saw that last night and I was like ready to click on buy and I'm like, no. I don't know.

[B]

Weird that they just. That now that it's out there.

[A]

Yeah. Well, frankly, that's the first time I paid attention.

[B]

The epiphany for them. They're like, you know what? That's it. This is how I feel now.

[A]

Yeah, just delete us and as a don't follow us and don't buy our stuff. Like that's just dumb. And are they.

[B]

Whatever article they saw or news thing or whatever or person they talk to.

[A]

But do they feel like I'd rather go out of business than take the money of somebody who thinks different than me? I think that might be apparently the dumbest. I don't think they teach that in business school. I don't think that's over there at W.P. carey here in town. They're like, look, only deal with. That's why I got. Remember we did that one thing. We did that golf tournament and I was in that men's group and the guy that gave the speech ran insurance companies and said he only deals with Christians.

[B]

His insurance company.

[A]

Yeah, he owned it. It was his deal. But he's like, and the good Lord has only brought me Christians. That's not true. There's no way you can. But he asked and only good Christians. So he was only giving insurance to people at his church and he was proud of it. And there I was an atheist.

[B]

He was blessed to be able to do that.

[A]

I was an atheist that needed his overpriced insurance. And I had to sit back and listen to that. And I'm like, well, you're off the. That's dumb business. The good Lord has only brought me Christians for my business. I'm like, that's not what he does.

[B]

You could have asked to got business from him. John, if you'd bend the knee.

[A]

Exactly. I need insurance. And I would have. He gave me a good rate at the time. I'd be like, does it come with a cross or should I buy my own? You're a good little soldier. Yes, I am. Lamb of God, 30% off.

[B]

Sorry we can't assure you, but I remember we work with. Yeah, don't work with pagans.

[A]

And I remember people were like clapping and I turned to you and I'm like, that guy's a dick. Why? He just said he won't deal with you if you don't think exactly like him. And it's insurance. That's against what he's. That's against his God. The last person that would say that.

[B]

What he was saying was like, you don't realize what you're saying is you. You're only working with people of faith.

[A]

Yeah, yeah. And. And you could.

[B]

So you're turning everyone else away. I don't think that's what he.

[A]

In the middle of the speech that he gave, I heard this thing in the sky just go. And it was Jesus hitting his. Of course it went. Because the hole in his hand. But then he hit himself right in the forehead. Yeah. I just don't get that. So. All right. I won't give the name of the company out of fairness because I think that's doing the same thing they're doing. And that's dumb. Nobody needs to bomb. But I think it's dumb. If you're running a business and you're playing that game. I don't know. You're gonna stick around. And if you do, good for you.

[B]

But better think about giving out samples to that influencer now.

[A]

Yeah, maybe. Well, you gotta ask. The way to get depends on what they believe in. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. What if it was a Trump mask? What if I wanted a Trump mask? Would they build it or would it just be too abhorrent to try that? It'd be like that guy said. It'd be downsy. It would be guaranteed it mental down. Hilarious. Anyway, it's just dumb. Stop being so dumb, everybody.

[B]

Cur. That makes me curious to throw that out there.

[A]

What?

[B]

Bad idea.

[A]

Oh, yeah.

[B]

See what they respond.

[A]

Can I have a. But I want it to be really good. Got Melania one. Would they make Melania as pretty she actually is, or would they have some sort of a goof in it? Melania is hot. She sat in there yesterday. Those billionaires see that? That said, the billionaires met Trump and they're bending the knee. Zucker. Zucker schmuck. Remember him?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

He's sitting right next to Trump at this table. Tim Apple. I always call him out. I don't know his last name. Tim Jones. Tim something. Cook. Cook. There it is. And Bill Gates. And they're all like, you're doing a great job, Mr. President. I'm like, these dudes. What? Wow. This is a thing. Thank you very much. And Tim Apple's like, I'm gonna give $600 billion to America. That's really nice of you, Tim Apple. Thank you so very much. Excellent work. You guys are very smart. Smart even you. Zucker Schmuck. It was right next to him. They're, like, praising him. I'm like, but in the whole thing, all I saw was Melania. Melania should teach posture to everyone, right, Left and otherwise. That woman that is royalty, sits up nice and straight. She's hot. But if I went to this company and said, I want to look like Melania, would they do like a one of those Genesis videos versions? They make me look like Sid. Marty Croft. Anyway, I just don't get it. I don't like the world that way. I'm just one of those innocent little lambs trying to walk through Make a Day Brady. And nobody's pushing you. Look at her yesterday. Look at how straight up and down she sits. Especially because Trump's such a slob. His posture's horrible. But Bill Gates is a good foot and a half shorter than her. And she is just towering. She's the only lady at the table that I can see. And she is a stunner. Tim Apple. Turns out Tim Apple's been faking it. Him and Pete. Tim Apple's faking it. Look at that. Zucker Schmuck's laughing. I call him Zucker Schmuck. I have no problem with him. I just think that's one of the funnier nicknames any president's ever given anyone. Then I gotta deal with Zucker Schmuck. And the next thing you know, they're sitting next to each other at some dinner, praising each other. That's how you know right there is how you know your politics don't matter. They hated each other a half hour ago. But when they're greasing each other's palms. It's. Everything's fine. They don't care about you. Why you guys all get wrapped up.

[B]

In his resting face, Trump's.

[A]

Look at him staring at my gorgeous wife. Jealous. Melania whispering, look at how hot she is now. I don't care if you're left or right. You can hate her all you want. She's hot. I want to ask everybody out there who's super far gone left, if Melania offered you a bj, would you take it? Well, yeah. I mean, I'm not, but yeah. Joe Biden. No, no, Jill. Nancy Pelosi in her prime. Well, maybe back in the 50s or something when she was some sweet meat. Hooks up top. She's in that picture with Kennedy. She was trying to get Kennedy to bang her. He was banging everybody else. Figured, why not? I. I'll be back for you in a couple of years. You're young. I'm 15 years old. All right, one year. You have to be able to drive yourself away from the White House before I stick it in. She was trying to ban Kennedy and he would have done it. She looked good in that picture. I mean, it's 1960, so it's. That's the, you know, the weird hair and the too much clothes, but still. I don't like Pelosi's politics. I think she's insane. Put out a rifle to her panty drawer. She gave me the chance in the 60s well, 70s maybe. Probably too. She's probably. Yeah. But not in 2025. You know what? Just for fun. Yeah. That weird lip licking thing and those gigantic earlobes. I don't know. Stop it, Brady. Nobody can see what you're doing and it's disgusting. He's trying to do his impression. No, they can't. I just see it. Stop doing that. Yeah. At 7:34. What do you got in the big board of musical treats? Now that we've solved my dilemma, Wake Up Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop. And they don't care how you voted. They're going to sell you a new pivot. They're going to sell you a new bike. And don't forget they got the big Labor Day special going on. It's. Well, it's going on through the seventh there. Snow gear on sale, all the bikes used new and of course all the gear to go along with it. Both locations right there at Gilbert Road and Southern, the og and of course the brand new one at power Road and McDowell. Check out the. All the socials to find out the specials they got. They got some great deals going on right now. Actionright.shop.com Guy says, I don't care if Putin wants to buy children's caskets for me. Whatever puts fuel in my boat. I'll deliver them myself. That's right. Bass Boat those kid caskets over to Russia.

[B]

Get the Pivot Donkey bike or the Pivot Elephant bike.

[A]

Huh? Oh, I see. Yeah, political bike. You get a red one or a blue one and scream out who you voted for in the mountain trails and nobody cares. You're making a fool of yourself. On the list, Black Sabbath. Slipknot. Spit it out for Dak. Saliva your disease. For Dak, new disease from spine. Shank for Deck Lightning Crashes for the game last night. Ride the Lightning. And of course, you know this one was going to come up. Judas Priest Turbo for Pete. Snot. My balls for Pete. And Spinal Tap. Big bottom for what Pete likes. We're not playing Big Bond, Static X Love. Big balls is not for Pete. We're hoping that he's not gay because then they'd have to prove big bottom is what Pete likes. I know he likes the big bottom. My balls. I know they're going on the ass thing. I want him to. I want him to be straight. I want him to be straight and then have to awkwardly fumble around with some nuts on Pay per View to prove that he deserved this. That's just my dream. I know it's not going to happen, but make them prove it has to come up here.

[B]

The fact that it's thrown out there, Please.

[A]

Make this a big deal. Everyone. Write your congressman today, immediately. Let's get this on tv, please. This guy said, I didn't know. I just looked up Nancy Pelosi when she was in college. Yep, I on that one. All right. Thank you for that, Kyle. Classy. Let's do a little Slipknot. Spit it out for a Dak and Jalen's thing last night. Spitting on each other like crazy. That's a good one. Slipknot's always a good way to start a Friday. I don't think so. I know I don't. Actually. There's no way that's in our systems. Bet could be from Toledo. No, I just have all the. Nope. I don't have it. You have to better pull up the lyrics. Oh, I will. We'll get that together. You have it right?

[B]

Ready?

[A]

I'm worried now. You got me scared. I'll have it here in a second. Now we're all. This is how we're. We're making sure that we don't cuss at you. Even though it's fun. All right, I got it. I'm ready. Ready? You ready? I'm ready. Okay, I think we're good. All right, here we go. Knock it out. I'll get it. No cussing. So far it's slipknot, everybody. It's 98. It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this. You P.D. holmberg's morning sickness. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. 98. Friday football season. It's good to see neither of you participating in football season or caring at all about your teams. I, however, look like a 13 year old boy got my hat on. Oh, you are in a bear's hat. Yep. You did nothing, Brady. You forget, my game's not till Monday, so I'll be dressed on Monday. Oh, yeah, you get yours on Monday. All right. That's true. You didn't. You're gonna. Monday night game. You'll have to do the weekend. It's football Friday. Oh, it's so good. So good.

[B]

I thought I had my black osu.

[A]

You don't pull over.

[B]

I gotta check. It might be in there.

[A]

Bangles. Well, he just reminded him. By the way, we don't care about your boyfriend's letter sweater. Some football. Some real football I got pinned. But I'd rather watch your OSU stuff on than that ugly ass.

[B]

I got a good Bangles jersey this year.

[A]

Ghetto skin that you've gotten is a horrible Bengals.

[B]

Big food will be on Sunday.

[A]

Oddly enough, the two coolest cats in the entirety outside the Lions and the entirety of the NFL's nickname gaming thing have the two worst uniforms by monumentally bad the Jags and the Bengals. Two predatory cats, badass cool colors. And they managed to screw it up and make it look like Panthers is. Panthers is pretty good. I don't. I don't.

[B]

I like the. I actually like the Jags better than the Panthers.

[A]

The multi colored helmet thing and the. And that light blue and gold. It's garbage. And they're kind of that sissy little picture of that little puma. God hates jags, Brady. We both know that at 7:58. Let's get right to it. It's time for the Brady Report, brought to you by our [e-mail]. our wicked weather people have Told us today is going to be a nightmare of hurricane residue. It's going to rain all day and all night. Night. Yep. So you never know. You can't trust the weather apps of the weather people in this town. They just don't know that giant storm that rolled through last week. If you'd have believed what they said prior to that 0% chance of rain, you left your awnings out, you'd have left your umbrellas up. If you were to listen to the weather people, well, you'd have been wrong. And you'd have had stuff all over the backyard. Unless you had all pro shades because they're self retracting. I love that feature. I think that's awesome. They put some shade in your backyard, you drop the temperatures out up to 20 degrees. And as beautiful as it is now, this week in the 90s, oh my goodness. Dropping it down to like 75 because that shade will bust out all those UV rays. You got yourself a little pleasure palace there. And if the wind starts whipping up, Even though Sean McLaughlin said it wouldn't, they take care of themselves. You don't even have to be home. They'll suck themselves right back in Buddha judge style. That's how it works. Allproche.com that's where you go. Brady reporter.

[B]

Good Friday morning to you. Phoenix. Hello world. We've made it.

[A]

Hi.

[B]

Happy National Cheese Pizza Day and National Lazy Mom's Day.

[A]

Good for you moms. Take a day off. Let that kid run all over.

[B]

A couple of baseless fun facts. California has the most billionaires of any US state with 124.

[A]

Wow.

[B]

New York is second with 93, followed by Texas 48, Florida 44. Who's got the least? Florida will probably go up too.

[A]

People are moving from California.

[B]

The tax.

[A]

Texas and California. Yeah.

[B]

There are eight states with zero billionaires.

[A]

Mississippi. I was just gonna say that they might have a couple because they've got that college.

[B]

Incorrect.

[A]

No, they don't have zero. Idaho. They're loaded with Idaho. Idaho's loaded with them. I would for Alabama maybe, but they got the Alabama. Really? Because they've got that college. You know, they got the, the space thing too. That like Huntsville is a monster of really wealthy people. And I learned that because there's a standup live there that our guys own again.

[B]

So you have a half a half a billion.

[A]

I don't know. 500 million is a lot of money.

[B]

But still, still 100 million.

[A]

Probably west, by God. Virginia.

[B]

Yes.

[A]

On the list. Maine. No billionaire wants to live in Maine. What They. What are they doing up there? You had a billion dollars, why would Maine be where you land? It's all the lobsters and stuff up there. There's some lobsters, yeah.

[B]

Fishery.

[A]

Really? You can't get lobsters anywhere.

[B]

Lumber. I don't know.

[A]

You wouldn't just scoot down to New Hampshire at least?

[B]

Oh, no.

[A]

There's cars now. They can move the lobsters to you. You're questioning they can, but yes, I am. He's in a food crisis. Brady is as good as Ethiopia right now as far as food's concerned. Yeah. The other ones would probably like Wyoming.

[B]

New Hampshire.

[A]

New Hampshire doesn't have a billionaire. That places. Delaware. Wow. Yeah. Again, why would you settle in an ice cold place?

[B]

New Mexico.

[A]

Oh, that. They don't have millionaires.

[B]

North Dakota, Vermont and West Virginia. Where do you name that one?

[A]

West. By God, yeah. New Mexico is always on those lists.

[B]

Ireland won its first Olympic medals in 1924. They got a silver in the painting competition and bronze and literature.

[A]

And we'll do it again if you ever bring those events back. You stymied us on those when you took them away and made everything about running with blacks. I didn't know they could read. Well, we can't read, but we can. We can rhyme real good limericks. We invented them, you bastard. But then everything became like, race a black guy and suddenly we couldn't win anything. That's the worst phrase in the world. In Ireland. Who wants to race a black guy? Oh, get, you bastard. You know we've got tiny little legs. I'll fight one. Yeah, you're gonna lose that too. Yeah, but I'll still do it.

[B]

The sounds from crunchy foods are comparable to tiny sonic sonic boom because the food is breaking up at the sound of the speed of sound.

[A]

That's the same with knuckle cracking. Something about that. About. I remember reading it.

[B]

The USPS made stamps with the Statue of Liberty this in 2011. We. We kind of talked about it when it came out. The picture they used was a Statue of Liberty outside New York. New York Casino in Las Vegas.

[A]

Really?

[B]

Whether it was the best picture or. Either way, they had to pay 3.5 million for copyright.

[A]

Oh, my God. Don't screw around with that. Can you imagine how bad that meeting had to be at the Irish Olympic Center? Right. They just canceled poetry. And they're looking to get rid of painting as well. What are we gonna do about our sports? What is it we can do, Seamus? Looking down the list here, not much. Most of it's racing the blacks. Tug of war and a tug of war. But we're gonna lose that one to those gargantuan Bulgarians.

[B]

Days are numbered.

[A]

Don't look like we're gonna be winning many golds anymore. We've got to get them to bring back painting. That doesn't look good. I think we're just gonna have to race. We're gonna have to race blacks now.

[B]

Look up the 1924 silver metal painting.

[A]

It's probably a black guy. Guy like, why are we painting? Erasing.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

We're not racing. We're not insane. Paint something. Painting. The Irish are dominant in the painting category of sports.

[B]

Were they on the clock?

[A]

Did you have to do it nude like the original Olympics? I just, I can't imagine that. It's a dark day here for Ireland sports. And I mean, it's the darkest of all. We have to race blacks now. Well, I'll do it. Ah, don't even bother with it. You'll get killed out there.

[B]

Katy Perry's mother once dated Jimi Hendrix.

[A]

Patrick had a heart attack trying to run the 100 yard dash. Cuz for the black guy it was like seven strides. For the Irishman, it was over 3,000. So much work to run a hundred yards. That's where tiny little eggs get going.

[B]

The big drawing for The Powerball tomorrow, 1.7. Bill.

[A]

I'm in. What's your number to get in? I know you don't play every. I know you don't play every time the powerball goes up, but yeah, what's your number? Is it a billion or is it a billion? I'm that stupid. I'm that stupid. I'm not even gonna bother for the $900 million billion dollars, though. That's. I'll go after that. Yeah, I start paying attention around a billion. Okay.

[B]

A website analyzed all the powerball drawings from the past 10 years. That's 1246 drawings since October 7, 2015. Over the past decade, Powerball drawings. The number that's most likely to come up of all numbers.

[A]

7.

[B]

61.

[A]

Oh. All right.

[B]

First five numbers of the Powerball drawing can be 1 through 69. 61 has drawn 115 times.

[A]

61 is what Travis, Kelsey and Taylor Swift do in the bedroom because she's a stick.

[B]

The least likely to be drawn. 13. It's only been drawn 66 times in the past decade. But the one that is most overdue. 26.

[A]

It's my birthday number.

[B]

Last time it was drawn April.

[A]

I'll tell you, you guys are lucky because I almost. I. I won Wednesday. 200 in tickets. And I pulled back a cool 19 bucks on that. I got half that. I got eight Chavez. 200 in tickets. And I looked, I'm like, you got to get at least the money back, right? No, $19. I won. I'm doing it again, man, because I'm stupid.

[B]

Same amount.

[A]

I'm like it. Yeah. I'm like an Irishman.

[B]

I cut mine down to whatever. I rolled it over.

[A]

Yeah, well, I'll take, though. I'm not taking 19 bucks and betting that there's no chance. I'm like an Irishman in the 1930 Olympics. I'm still trying. What are you doing here, man? Ain't no more painting. Ah, I'll show you. Kimba.

[B]

There's a new kid friendly WI Fi phone called Tin Can. It's all over social media. Me, Social media. The target market is nostalgic parents who don't want their kids to have a real phone yet. No texting or apps. It's like an old school landline with a cord. It works over WI Fi. Only approved people can call it. And you can control outgoing calls, too. It's a nod to those old Tin can phones. Yeah, you see with the string on it, the handset even is curved with like a can and has little ridges. It's basically for 10 year olds who want a phone.

[A]

No, it's not.

[B]

Not old enough yet.

[A]

Nope. It's for wives buying their husbands they don't trust in the 80s and 90s. This is not gonna be for your kids.

[B]

Pre sales right now. Yeah, the first shipments go out next month.

[A]

Yeah, originally five bucks. It's gonna be for kids. And then when wives figure it out, like, hey, wait a second. Second. The dude who's got an I love my wife bumper sticker is going to have one of these weird can phones in a few days. You're like, hey, got a new phone there, Pete? Yeah, my wife got a new phone for me. It's just, it's only allowed to call like eight people. And she loaded it. Was that broad worth it? That's going to be the next question. I'll go read my back of my car. It says I left my wife.

[B]

The lame part is it's not one and done deal. 75 bucks.

[A]

Gotta walk around. There's a free plan phone to prove that it's the Scarlet Letter. You've been identified. Allowed to have a big boy phone anymore. I screwed up. Morning sickness. Medicate K.D. holberg's morning sickness.

[B]

There is a free plan that lets you call other tin cans. Jesus Christ. But if your kid wants to call grandma's cell or dial 911.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

You need the party line plan, which is 10 bucks.

[A]

None of this is about kids. It's. That's the. It's going to be sad. You're going to see sad dudes with cans on their desks. You're not allowed to text or call. I can't. Hey, give me a call. I'm not allowed. My wife's got to put you in my phone and, like, clear it. I got like eight people. I'm allowed to call. You go downstairs and Moynihan's got a can. Got a burner can. I just pictured this. Now this is a fun thing, too. This guy wanders up. All right, I'm here to. I'm here to sign up for the hundred yard dash for the Olympics. 1930. What's the approving time here? What do I have to do? Like, most people have been doing about nine and a half seconds. Nine and a half seconds? I thought you'd say about a half hour. How are they doing it? What? I got jet packs. No, it's just Jamaicans. I've never seen one move like that. I. I'd see it to believe it. I'll get out there. I'm the fastest Irishman. I finished 100 yard dash in about 38 minutes. I'm a lightning quick Irishman.

[B]

Now it's time for science news.

[A]

Does the earth move that fast? Does he reverse time with that speed? I love that they painted. I can't get enough of that. On the gold medalist from the last Olympics. I'm here for the new ones where we get trounced by the blacks. Oh, good. Sign up here. Seamus McShamus. Wonder who got the gold in painting. Yeah, the Irish.

[B]

No, they got silver.

[A]

Oh, we only got. I thought you said the only time they wanted gold was the first metal. Italians. I can't get enough of that one. You think the Italian? Yeah, probably da Vinci. You know, they had some good ones. Picasso.

[B]

The Greeks were strong.

[A]

Nah, they were sculptors. Yeah, I guess if there was an Olympic sculpting or Maryville would have too. Their graffiti's great. Yeah, okay. The Mexicans could have come in on this painting. Depends on the medium. If you had to use brushes. The Italians. Yeah, if it's Krylon, that's almost as unfair as the Irish race. And the Jamaicans. Hey, player, I'm an Olympic champion. Let me guess.

[B]

And now it's time.

[A]

I can spray paint Art on chain link, my friend. You got it. You're impressive. That should be an Olympic sport, graffiti art. Oh, yeah. That's the break dancing is. I know. Might as well. I mean, that was kind of racist that you compared the two, but sure, you're right, Right? It's tag competition. Did you ever see beat, street or breaking? It's all graffiti. I've only seen breaking. Too electric. That's right. The search for Curly's boogaloo.

[B]

Science things.

[A]

Go ahead. All right, calm down. We'll get to you when I feel like it. God damn it. You don't push me around. I'm having fun with this Irish Olympian. My brain is running wild with him. What about the longer events? How long does it take them to, like, run a marathon now? The Kenyans are doing that in two hours. Two Earth hours. Don't you get a break in a hotel card in the middle of that thing? How are they doing it in two hours?

[B]

Maybe they can paint while they run.

[A]

Slow us down. Even Brady. The Kenyans just be blowing by us. We should make them paint while we run. Even it out a little bit.

[B]

A team in China figured out how to make Glow in the Dark plants. They injected the succulents with the same compound used in Glow in the Dark toys, and it said it could be used on larger plants, too. Imagine glowing trees replacing street lights.

[A]

Sweet.

[B]

It's like Avatar, except for.

[A]

Yeah, I guess it is. Do they have glowing trees in Avatar? Yeah, that's true. Start to, kind of.

[B]

Because you're like, turn off the. Turn off your head. A flashlight or something.

[A]

I'll tell you, the only time I've ever felt like I was on another planet. I was in the Virgin Islands, and the lady that was running the show there at the resort at Canal Bay, which is gone hurricane away. It was a beautiful place. Said, oh, you're lucky you're here at a perfect time. You can go into the shallow water at night, and the phosphorescent jellyfish are out. And I'm like, I'm not getting around them. She goes, they don't hurt. And she goes in there everywhere. I'm like, what are you doing? She goes, stand in the water. Water. I'm like, okay. So I walked out in the water at night and I put my hand in, and the motion of the water made them glow, just glow. And the whole thing around me was yellow, like, bright. And it was already crystal clear water blue as you've ever seen. And you don't see them look fake. You don't see him. So your hand brushes across, and it's making yellow lines. Like, you put your fingers in, like a rake, and it would make it. It was unreal. And I never once, like, occasionally see. Oh, there's. It's like sea monkeys. Like, they see them. It was the coolest thing I've ever seen.

[B]

Researchers taught a robot dog how to play badminton. One science writer described it as being really good at it, but it maxed out at just 10 shots in a row before it missed. Still pretty good.

[A]

Mm.

[B]

A study found that kids with helicopter parents have a harder time when they leave home and face life on their own.

[A]

That seems kind of. Yeah. Common sense. What's scientific about that? I was gonna say that's not science. That's like. Yeah, I kind of knew that. But what's the dilemma there? What was the. Like, the study revealed that they just.

[B]

Want to know if helicopter parents would have an effect on kids.

[A]

That they're. They're gonna. Yeah. That they're gonna have a harder time not being guided.

[B]

Yeah. Mildly stressful things are more likely to seriously stress them out.

[A]

Yeah. Because mommy was always right there.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

Yeah. They're. Helicopter kids are 100 across. This is science. They're right. That's all. Yeah. All of them. That's not science either. No, that's. Yeah, that's just. What would I. That's just observation, I guess. It's science.

[B]

The Harvard researcher Avi Loeb, he's the guy that still thinks the interstellar comet zipping through the solar system could be an alien ship. Experts think it could be 20 miles across, and he thinks that's even more evidence it's aliens. He wrote in a blog that bigger is better for interstellar stellar spacecraft.

[A]

Could be like a city coming up.

[B]

Basically. You'd want it to be big enough so it could fit lots of people, create artificial gravity, and not get torn apart by radiation along the way.

[A]

All right, let's cut to the chase. How far away is it?

[B]

They didn't say how far away it was.

[A]

Can Elon get to it yet?

[B]

Well, the only thing they said was the biggest spacecraft we've ever built is the space station, which is about the size of a football field.

[A]

Yeah, but if they're interstellar traveling, we can expect them to have better space stuff. Can we crash something into it and see if it pisses him off? Just send Goldblum up there as MacBook. Exactly. Let's get something up there and smash into it. And if it doesn't fight back, it's A rock. If it does well, we were going to die anyway. 20 miles.

[B]

I need to wear my aluminum foil hat.

[A]

Yeah. I'm not fighting back. I'm not in that army. If the twenty Mile City lands on earth, I'm pretty much like, they win. I'm pretty sure their technology gonna kick the. We're gonna throw rocks at him.

[B]

That's your science news. Got a 21 year old chick in Florida named Alexandra Dominguez. She's con been convicted of two counts of domestic battery, one by strangulation after a violent dispute began over a missing PlayStation game.

[A]

That'll happen.

[B]

The case must have been convincing. The jury only needed 20 minutes to.

[A]

Well, she strangled somebody over.

[B]

You know, the charges came from the incident back in April. Alexandra freaked out over missing PlayStation game and the victims were her own family. She shoved her mother to the ground and started choking her.

[A]

How old was she? 21.

[B]

21. Her younger brother. Mother tried to break up the fight and that's when she turned on him and grabbed his groin, squeezed it.

[A]

Oh.

[B]

Striking him multiple times. Both victims suffered visible injuries, but they're both okay.

[A]

You don't man, they'll stab you in the neck.

[B]

Alexandra is facing up to five years in prison.

[A]

She was playing Grand Theft Auto. There's no way she wasn't. She was kind of cute. I wonder. Nash. She wasn't up close. Never mind.

[B]

Not bad.

[A]

It's okay. It's a mug shot. I'll give her break. She got good hair. I almost strangled my ex wife playing Grand Theft Auto one time. That motorcycle race. I remember that. It's only a game. You don't know. You don't know. Oh, man. I. Controllers flying against the wall. I stuck a PlayStation controller in my wall because of that. That particular motorcycle race. That was the most frustrating thing I've ever done with her. I took it. Megan was. It was in the bedroom and I'm playing along and she's doing whatever she does when I'm playing games next to me. In fact, that was when it came with a big giant like book that could guide you through. So Megan was trying to navigate and all I had to do was win this race. There were like no tips or hints or anything. And I would get to where almost the end. You remember how horrible that was? Oh, yeah. When you'd have a good race and then somebody go, think you had to win. Yeah. No second place. No second place. And it starts all over. And it was the hardest race ever. Ever. I remember taking the controller and throwing it so hard it Buried in the drywall. And the last thing I needed to hear was said, real nice, super mature. Oh, somebody's gonna get killed. Are you familiar with domestic violence? Because it's coming your way. It's just a game. Life is a game.

[B]

Did Dima from Rockstar Games, did he ever pull that up when we were watching?

[A]

No, this. This thing came out of nowhere. It just. Suddenly we're in this motorcycle race, and you hadn't ridden farther. Could not do anything except that race. Oh, it was so frustrating. I'm frustrated thinking about it. That was 18 years ago.

[B]

Got some LEGO news. You see this lady? That Gabriel Wall from New Zealand broke a world record by running across 100 meters barefoot of Legos.

[A]

Thank you, Heather. Oh, she did it.

[B]

100Ft, 100 meters and 24.75 seconds.

[A]

That should be an Olympic event. That'll slow down. Blacks down. They have to run on Legos. Oh, man.

[B]

They had some company donate 661 pounds of Legos. Those.

[A]

Some company she trained. Every mother in America would donate those. Oh, my God.

[B]

And she trained a couple of months to build up calluses on her feet. They're still kind of cut up afterwards.

[A]

But walking on Legos, the worst were the.

[B]

What was it like? The windows, the certain pieces.

[A]

Legos, corner windows. The. The worst part about it is if you know you're walking on Legos, it's probably easier than when you accidentally step on Lego. Intentionally walking on Legos, like, if you stepped on a hot coal in your house, it would hurt, but if you want to walk across hot coals, you're mentally prepared for it. So I think walking across legos, even though 100 meters is an impressive feat. Pardon the pun, Stepping on one Lego unexpected is harder than walking across 100 meters of Legos when you are doing it on purpose.

[B]

I mean, when we saw that radio video a couple weeks ago where they. They did the treadmill where they put down.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Finally, the guy bailed out on the tax.

[A]

Brutal. Oh, on tax. Yeah, yeah. Step on attack, and it's horrible. Step on a thousand of them intentionally, and you can prep yourself for. It's still gonna hurt, but you at least expect the pain. So this is less impressive than anyone who's ever stepped on a rogue Lego.

[B]

The other LEGO story. Star wars fans, get ready to drain your savings account account nerds. They just announced the most expensive set ever for a thousand bucks. It's the Death Star, and it's part of the Ultimate Collector series. It has 9023 pieces, comes with 38 characters, including three versions of Luke Skywalker, two versions of Han Solo.

[A]

But like, nerds don't put those together. They keep them in the box.

[B]

It's a cross section of the Death Star. So it's like you sliced it in half and you can hang it on a shelf. It has like 38. 38 different compartments. Like the trash compactor room.

[A]

Yeah. Nothing hot chicks love more than walking into a dude's place and he's got half a Death Star hanging from the ceiling. That's. That is. You're getting laid for sure.

[B]

The Death Star comes out October 4th. You can sign up for early [e-mail].

[A]

Yeah, look, enjoy your celibacy, but. And it's neat, but you're not getting laid a lot. At least at all. You gotta find a special lady. John Gordon found a special. Maybe Dominguez here or something. Oh, yeah, Maybe that lunatic who fights you over. She'll grab your nuts. I mean, she won't be. You won't like it, but she'll definitely touch you there. Yeah, the girl that fights over video games, She's. Wow.

[B]

I just have two brain videos. Actually, the first one's not even a Brady video. It's just a still shot of guy with a ass problem.

[A]

I don't know what that means. It's Pete Buttigieg. Yeah, I don't know if it's a hammer. Oh, my God. What year is this from?

[B]

Don't know. It's black and white.

[A]

Yeah, it looks like he sat on the world's biggest cross crawler and it just stuck to his ass. It is a massive. What is that thing? Okay, well, thanks for that. It's Brady's videos are a still photo from the 1800s. It's a sepia.

[B]

Then the last one is for you, John. It's a foot taco from India.

[A]

Oh, the guys. Oh, Jesus. He's just sitting in this tree. He's got his bare feet out. He's making tacos on the ground. What does he take out? He scratches his foot. He scratches his dirty bare foot, reaches into some sort of muck water, and then finishes the taco with those same bare hands. And his feet are coated and whatever the hell that is. Oh, leaves. How do they have a billion plus people in that nation who's having sex with these filthy ants? Animals. All the. All the smart ones moved here and became doctors. Like, if you still live there.

[B]

Do you think his setup is. Hey, when we're out, we're out. Like a good barbecue place.

[A]

Yeah, like, little mess we're out of foot talking. Sorry. He got till 11. Sanjay's feet. Next time we see him, is he. Is he using that as ingredients or is that just happenstance? I think he just had an itch.

[B]

I'm wondering because I. When I get on that one, there are a couple more and I'm like, this one can't be real. The guy's got his foot in the juice.

[A]

Well, is he. Is the juice? Yeah, the juice is a splash, like.

[B]

But the other one is a bigger that I saw. He has a foot just soaking in there.

[A]

Oh, man. That's enough. I'm banning all its videos. Curry food videos from India. I'd much rather watch those videos where people's heads get cut off by trains. I got some for you. Oh, all right, Brad, it's time for your Friday. It's Friday Friday videos. Yeah, you could. It could be kidney friendly. Eat off that Indian's toes. Here's some tactical black for you. All right. Lady is putting her hair in a ponytail. Standing on a sidewalk barking at some guy. Oh, Blair's back. Wait. Beautiful right cross. Picks him up by his shirt after she knocks him out. I think it might be a man. That was manly move. Knocked this dude cold and then picked him up off the ground by his T shirt. She's got feminine. That punch is all man. And then to lift him off the. Deadlift his corpse. Don't take her PlayStation game. That's what happens to you. What happens when you.

[B]

That was a fight in the line of the foot taco.

[A]

Yeah. Oh, man. Brady's stuck on that foot taco. He's. Ah, here we go. Talk about some here we go. Indian food. Oh, my God. It's a woman pooping in a man's mouth. Oh, it's a big one. Oh, God. Oh, my God. It's an Italian sausage sized boo. Oh, he's got. Oh on replay now. The slow motion replay. It's clay colored. Oh, my God. And it is all the way down. And There's a good 6 inches left to go in. She pinches it off and she's peeing too. Flops down into his eyes. She pinched it and it flopped into his eyes and he's just laying there with a. A big one laying across his face and deep in his sword. And by the way, he's covered in someone else else's feces. Oh, she's taking the remaining log. He's dead.

[B]

He's dead. He's dead.

[A]

There we go. He's. He's throating steep throat in the pool. Want me to replay it?

[B]

No, no need.

[A]

Oh, man. She started to use it like a. Like a churro. There's a new meaning for snail trail. Oh, my God. What is that?

[B]

Snail and a snail.

[A]

There's a snail inside a woman's body. Body in her most important part.

[B]

Yeah, that's the shell, too.

[A]

She got the shell. Is she birthing it? She's put it in and now she's birthing a snail. Here comes the push. Just push a little more to, like, you're dilated just a little. That noise was the snail coming out. Why are there more in there, Brett? I didn't get that far. She put it right back in. Oh, no. She put it on top like some sort of a barnacle. Unless he doesn't have a lot of salt in her body. No, because we know that because the snail isn't popping and sizzling. All right, what's this one? Oh, here you go. There's some homeless action. Homeless? Oh, there's homeless oral sex. One's got a McCafe and the other one is going down on this homeless lady. Oh, yeah, you going viral. Oh, my God. Guy filming him. They just noticed there's a dude filming him a foot and a half away. Nasty ass.

[B]

You wanted that to play.

[A]

No, I didn't. I didn't realize it said that. He's not wrong, but there was a terrible word in there. I'm gonna save that one. All right, homeless people doing oral sex on the sideways walk. What would you rather do? The Indian taco, the foot taco, or her? Which one do you take a bite of first? Give me the foot taco. No kidding. Yeah, I am, too. I think I go for the homeless lady.

[B]

You go viral, bro.

[A]

Yeah, I will. This nasty. It's a campaign to stop smoking. Oh, no. But she put a cigarette out inside her vagina. Oh, my God. Oh, they're snuffing out a cigarette. Yeah, me too. Oh, Lord. Oh, that's enough. It's out. It's out.

[B]

Look at those fingers.

[A]

Oh, she's a fat lady. She's got fat fingers. That's the noise I'm making. Why are you making the same one? You volunteered for this. Holy smokes, man. So, pardon the pun. Oh, that's a tough one there. Don't do that little toilet action for you. Oh, we got somebody Calipers Speculum again. And it's that pee. Yeah, it's opening up a butt with this speculum thing. And then somebody's peeing inside the open hole.

[B]

They're missing.

[A]

They're not. Well, it's a girl. She got no aim. No, they can't pee outside for this reason. It goes everywhere. Look at her. She's got a gaping hole to hit. She's terrible at it. If this was miniature golf, she'd be on her fifth shot. Oh. Oh, she just tore her stuff up. There we go. Now it's full of the other lady. All right, that's. And then that's happening right now somewhere outside, Brady. Somewhere in this town. Yes, sir. All right. Oh, there's an old naked lady, contacted me for a gum job. A gum job. Oh, she's gonna take her teeth out, isn't she? Oh, here comes the cup to take. Take her teeth now. Oh, she's got a speech. Should I listen to the speech? I think this one's clean. Yeah. Okay, now you can proceed. Oh, this lady's hangers are down to her hips. Oh, those are her teeth going in the glass. Oh, God. Oh, she's putting the teeth on the penis. She's rubbing the teeth up and down the penis with her hands. They're out of her mouth. Oh, God. Now she's taking her walk walker into another room. And she's nude with a walker. Is this filthy animal gonna bang this old lady's walker? Come on. Oh, God.

[B]

There's nothing funny about this.

[A]

Yes, there is. Oh, my God. Okay, they. They have her. Her name is Rena Mae. And they put her quote up there like she's, you know, Benjamin Franklin one. I just love the teeth dropping in the glass.

[B]

Yeah. Kind of a tease.

[A]

Oh, man. Look for the silver lining. Now you can proceed. The teeth going in the glass. That's pretty good. And that noise where kind of that death exhale. And the bad thing is she's probably in, like, 20. She's in her walker, too. She's in her walker while she rubs.

[B]

The teeth on there.

[A]

Old people shouldn't do that. Hey, Brady, this is going on too, right now a lot. Yeah, yeah. There's an old lady with a walker coming out of the shower because the old. This is going on too. Oh, God.

[B]

All right, give me a number.

[A]

Oh, my God. That's your future, brother. If you have one. That's it. If they get you a kidney, that's what you've got to look forward to. That's my future.

[B]

That's looking bright.

[A]

Oh, my God. See, that's why I'm kind of against modern medicine. I like Brady's God's original plan where we all kind of died around 30 there's no reason for us to drag on into that. Drop our teeth in a cup. Putting teeth in a cup and eating weens that's not supposed to go to down. Neither was he. No, no, no, no, no, no. You're absolutely right. Old lady or homeless lady? Which one are you doing?

[B]

Oh, old lady.

[A]

You do? Yeah, I think so too. At least it'd be an experience. These sons of. You're going homeless. That's somebody's grandma. I don't care.

[B]

It's my future.

[A]

No, you're going to do it eventually. You're going to be doing that soon. We all are. Everybody. If we're lucky. That's what we have to look forward to in the future is some old lady coming out of the shower. She go, go wash that thing up and come back to bed. Glad I this. And she comes naked, rolling back with that walker. And you're. Yeah. Get those teeth out and give me a goodie. And she's got to slowly walk that weird droopy double butt back to bed. And you see it the whole. Turn the lights out. What's wrong with you? I'll trip and fall if the lights are out. Edward, just shut your eyes. I can't look away, Marion. She already looks like the melted Nazi at the end. Oh my God. Was she burned badly or is that just what our skin turns into?

[B]

That's her skin.

[A]

I don't want to get old. We're not supposed to. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady Report. It's 98. You're all getting older. It's not weird. It's pretty cool actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough.

[B]

This.

[A]

Morning sickness. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil. Sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. 98. I wanted to do a fireside chat tomorrow. We're going to be too late to do that. Can't do it. I know. Brett's all broken up about it. Nothing you can do. Sorry. Sorry, sorry.

[B]

Bumped me out.

[A]

But with football upon us, we do have to talk about something. And I'd like you guys to do that. This again? We did it last year. You must put your hundred dollar bet on your FanDuel account today for your super bowl prediction. And that's it. And we made them yesterday. But you got to do your bets today. FanDuel is back. And now FanDuel is better than ever with the. Make it up yourself. Have you played with that yet? No. Oh, man, it's trouble. So you can go on, like, let's say my jets and Steelers game this weekend, right? So the Steelers, you can pick like they're, they're running back Jalen Warren. It says, here's what we think he's going to do. What do you think he's going to do? And it has gives you a little slide on how many yards you think you'll get, and it increases or decreases the odds as you pick. So if you're like, oh, how about we get Dak Prescott to have two rushing touch and you can, you can make your own without looking at theirs. They just give you a name game. And then like, like you type in what you want. So you can bet against fanduel, basically, if you just make your own thing. You are Fanduel. You're the guy. You're. You know who you are. Ace Rothstein. You're making the phone. Give me the phone. For Christ's. You're making the lines. You're making your own lines. You're like, I don't like this line. I want another line. And you can make them easier. You can make safer bets or you can make bets a little bit more difficult. It is insane. So I started to play with that the other day. I was like, brady, I started off.

[B]

Strong with my first nine leg parlay.

[A]

How's that?

[B]

Went one for nine.

[A]

Hey, that's good. You bet in college football the first week?

[B]

No, I bet last night on, on the game on Thursday night.

[A]

Oh, you built one for last night?

[B]

I built one last night, yeah. And that rain delay.

[A]

Yeah, I'm not. First week bets are tough, but yeah, FanDuel's got that whole thing going. And it is, it's remarkable. And actually I think of it because I'm an idiot of how hard it's going to be for me to hit the. You can make them less and be smarter so you can take something and go, well, that's not going to happen. And scooch it back. So if, like, Saquon Barkley, you had him for over 60 yards last night, you could have had him like 55. And he, he got 60. But I think they had him at like 80. But if it's 80, you can just scroll it back to 60. And they'd be like, well, you're not going to win much money. But put it in a parlay can make it really safe. So it actually, actually, if you're a smart person and I am not, you can make all the bets like easy winners and build parlays and we're like $80. Or you can be like me and build giant lotto tickets that pay off like 3 million bucks because you're too stupid to realize that Aaron Rodgers won't throw for five touchdowns on Sunday. But, man, if he did, I get a million dollars. Yeah, it's, you know, I mean, there is Sauce Gardner, although he's injured. So who's your football? Who's your Super Bowl? You said said Bills and Lions yesterday. That's mine, too. What about you? I was with Dale. I went Eagles. Buffalo. That's right. All right, put your money on that right now. Put your money where your mouth is on FanDuel right now. And while you're at it, I'm going to show you a picture of the assumed posture of a human being in the year 2050. Scientists have gotten back to this. This is what the. In, like, AIs, they asked AI what the beauty standard for a woman is today.

[B]

Yep.

[A]

And AI gave us this picture. That'll work. There's a beautiful blonde lady with huge cans. Her lips are a little inflated, but she's still pretty natural looking. Although her waist is like a 22 inch waist. And her cans are like 36Ds. They're gorgeous. The problem, A lot of surgery, but it's natural surgery now. The way things are going with the way people are looking at beauty standards with lips getting bigger and things like that, AI was asked to create what it thinks the future woman will look like. With all of our hunched over the phone stuff. Like, you know how we're all like, you're doing it right now. Yeah. Hunched up over the phone. You're gonna get something. It's got a. It's got a name. It's. It's horrifying. But that's got a name about what happens to your neck when you look down all the time.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Like it becomes permanent and then it becomes like, what people? And you can't move it up.

[B]

Build that hunt shop.

[A]

Yeah, you build calcium and you do that. So, AI, what do you think women will look like in 2050? And it did this.

[B]

Oh, my.

[A]

Perfect bodies, giant lips. And our heads are pointed almost straight down from all the screen use because we don't put it up in front of our faces like we should.

[B]

Like the, the BC cartoon.

[A]

It does. It is. But her body is amazing. If I showed you this, I'm like, look at. This is the chick I'm dating. You'd be like, nah. But her head yeah. But is just awful. So AI assumes that our eyes are going to start to bulge because we're looking at tiny stuff all the time. Lips are going to be. Yeah, lips. It's Gollum. You're absolutely right. Our lips are going to be massive. At least ladies will, because the beauty standard seems to be trending in the ways of the bigger the better for lips. Although that's gotta eventually stop. So if we stay on this same course, we're going to be hunchbacks with great boots, boobs, and massive lips. And to be honest with you, so long as she has a nice personality, will we care? I'm kidding. I'm kidding. Of course we'll care. Let's see what's wrong. Tighten it up, ladies. Get that? Start looking. And if this is anything, AI is pretty good at stuff. How about we start practicing the phone in front of our faces, held high rather than down by our guts where we looked straight down at our chest. Chests. It's weird. The posture problem is terrible.

[B]

Yeah. You're at your desk a lot of times too.

[A]

Sure. But you can still hold it up. Nobody puts their computer screen on the desk flat. But that's what we're doing with our phones. You know computer screens. You'd complain if you're like, I'm going to here to buy a computer screen and the guy just laid it down. You'd be able to put it on a stand or something. It's got to be up. Why would I stare down? You do it with your phone all the time. What's the deal difference? We have to start straightening that up. Because science isn't wrong when it comes to, like, what happens to your body when you look down 18 of the 24 hours a day your neck will freeze. Like.

[B]

And when do they figure that's going to happen?

[A]

2050 is all. They think 20, 25 years. And 25 years. They're like, if we keep this up, there's a good chance we we'll be unable to reverse the neck damage. It's like somebody with a bad back. They stay hunt hunched because straightening up is hard or impossible. So. And then the other thing that'll start happening is more surgeries for your neck bones to straighten you out. But yeah, you want to be a hunchback, Keep it up. You'll see me from now on my phone above my head. I'm terrible about it. I actually lean it into my stomach and look straight down. I watch you do it. You do it on the table a lot. I don't ever See you on your phone. I'm usually like this. Hey, you're pretty straight ahead. You use the armrest. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah, it works. Yours isn't bad, Brett. You actually won't be a hunchback of the future. I'm terrible. I'm gonna be a mess.

[B]

I do it down lower. Down there, but this is how I usually do it.

[A]

Not when I'm watching you.

[B]

Yeah, well, because I'm not.

[A]

I don't want you to see. No, you don't want to handbrake. When you're. When you literally. You're like me. I don't think you realize it.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

When you're on your phone.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

You have it down on the counter.

[B]

Well, I can't droop the.

[A]

No, you don't. You don't ever have to worry about having a droopy neck, because you need a neck for that. But, yeah, your back turns into a c. You. I do the exact same thing. And then I, I. I slouch into my.

[B]

I might turtle up, and I might end up the posture. Like, you're. You're in law with the.

[A]

No, with no neck. First off, let's not go crazy that we're related to that guy, because I'm not. It's from another place. It's cousins. Married my cousin related. I don't have cousin in law. It's not a thing. No, it's a cousin, and she married a guy whose neck was surgically removed. I wish that. I wish that wasn't true, but that's very true. I give his name out so you guys could see it, but you guys would be jerks and, like, make comments. If I could trust the entire audience to go, you got to take a look at this. But don't say it anything. One of you would be like, holberg told us about this. All right. They know me. Of course, when you say Holmberg told us about this, that's. Everyone in the city he lives in is named Holmberg. So anyway, I trust him. I swear to God. His neck was removed surgically, and his little head rests on.

[B]

It's unique.

[A]

It's hilarious. He makes Brian Erlacher look like a giraffe. He's Scottish, he's got no neck, and he wears a lot of collared shirts, and it's hilarious. Like, he said somebody should tell him, v necks only, but he won't. I can't wear V necks. Don't have a neck. Oh, God, he's right. Well, then V chest it, because what you're doing ain't working with the. Yeah, he looks like Dracula. Yeah. Just in a Dracula in a polo. Because his polo collar goes up past his ears. Is everybody laughing at me? Well, it's because you got no neck. I know. I'm surgically removed. Don't you have any empathy for a man with no neck? Not when you wear giant collars. You look hilarious. You look like you got hammered into your shirt. Or maybe it felt like I got hammered into my shirt and that's why I had to have my neck removed. I. I know two people in my life that have had their necks surgically removed. Two. One was my friend, Colin's friend and he didn't warn me. I want you to meet a friend of mine from Oklahoma. He's a good guy.

[B]

Don't look at him.

[A]

He didn't say anything. And we go to. We went to dinner to meet him and the dude shows up and you know what? He. And this was with my ex wife and she's sitting there. She was a tall thin woman and necklace guy sits there and I think Geneva had asked him like, so are you married? Do you have a girlfriend? No. He was kind of a jerk about it. And she goes, well, what kind of lady. Are you interested? I'm like, are you going to set him up? Do you know somebody with no neck? What do you doing? And he goes, somebody the opposite of you. I prefer my woman. A little meat on my bones. You're a little auschwitzy. I'm like, what the. And she started getting really upset and I'm like, that was a. You're a jerk. He's picky. Yeah. How are you picky? And I know why he would say that a guy with no neck needs a fat lady to know where she is all the time. Because I mean if he can't turn fast. So if she's like thin and moves, he's like, ah. Where'd she go? Go. Big lady's always like a remnant of her is in his eyeline. Two people surgically removed. Next. I didn't even know that's a thing. John. Isn't that what a woman's face is supposed to be doing? Pointing down with huge lips being put to use? Yeah. Yeah. In a weird way.

[B]

Well, you take a look at that. You don't. You don't like it that way. The way that I guess if all you're really.

[A]

If all you care about is the back of their head. Heads. The future will be fine because that's what you're. That's all you're going to see there's a front. I'm just rude. But yeah, if that's the future and you know, it's just about the backs of their heads, then yeah, Brett's. Brett's future is bright. I'm warning you though, AI is calling it. You're all going to be hunched up messes. And I see it. I get so paranoid about that though, like wanting to sit up straight because I had the back surgery 15 years ago. And they're like, it's all posture. It's all posture. Keep your posture. And then you finally, you see yourself sinking slower and slower into the mast. Everybody sit up straight. That's what I'm telling you right now. That's it. Class has begun. Sit up straight. Put your feet on the floor. So look out for that. That's all I'm saying. We got ourselves an entertainment drill coming up in just moments. It's 98. Hey, it's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee. I have heard enough of this for you. PD Hs. Morning sickness. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. 98 still solid top to bottom. 21 year old song. That song can drink now. And it is just fantastic to this day. Slip knot, everybody. It's 9:16. Want to say yesterday was pretty awesome. Before we get to the entertainment drill, went over to lost our home pet rescue and hold on. And the dog we did was a pressa canario. Haven't ever done one of those over.

[B]

Really?

[A]

That was awesome. It wasn't a huge one. It was a good one. And it was kind of a golden yellow lab colored. His name was Fisher. And you're like, oh, John, I watched the video. Fisher's not the video. It's because as we were leaving, a dude that came in said, I'm just here to visit Fisher. And I'm like, you're gonna love this dog. It's the best dog in the world. Well, it turns out that dude did fall in love with that dog. And the dog we were supposed to do for the pick of the litter this week got adopted like an hour and a half after we left, which is awesome. So we've got to get the other two out of there. And I think it was the ones from last week. They're a combo, but they don't have to be together. But they would. They love each other. They're Best friends, buddies. So let's get them out of there. But it was awesome. And congratulations to Fisher's new owner. That dog was so cool. Big, bright blue eyes and like yellow lab coloring, but big. Probably about 80 or 90 pounds. It was a good sized dog. It was so cool. But I think Manu's still there. And was it Charlie and Daisy? They got a whole bunch. I think those are right names. I don't know if I'm getting that right. Go get a dog. That's all I'm saying. And then don't forget that tomorrow the nicest man in the world, Jim Manley, his band is going to play up there, Cactus Jacks. And he decided just because he's the nicest man in the world that he's going to do it for the lost our home pet rescue foundation. So he's going to give money up there. I think it's like 10 bucks at the door. If you want to walk in there and do it, I think that's great. It starts early too, like 6 o'. Clock. So get in, you get out, you go have dinner, have a nice time with and get to meet the nicest man in the world and his band. Don't tell Mandy. That's pretty awesome. So lost her home wins all the way around. And so good to see Fiser go out the door yesterday. It's the first time I've ever had that happen. We talked to the dude. I think we talked him into it right there at the door. And he. And he. And it worked out great. So head on over to lost our home pet rescue and. And help out one of those beautiful animals for the pick of litter. The video's up right now. 98kupd.com it's time now for Brady to entertain us all. It's brought to you by our [e-mail] the home of tactical black self defense training. Training. Got an email from a lady who said sometimes de escalation doesn't work. You just can't. No, that's true. De escalation is the smartest way to defend yourself. It's just the. It just hurts your ego and your pride so much. You got to get over that. I think Marcellus Wallace said it best. Pride. But sometimes you have somebody doing that. She said that her husband was up there. I think I remember she said slide rock and some hillbilly came up, up and took a swing at her husband out of nowhere. Well, then that's fighting right there. There's no. Yeah, you got to Defend that. You're under attack. And the good news was the guy kind of knew what he was doing, and he went and slugged the hillbilly in the face. And the guy's tooth came off in his fist. Stuck in his fist. That's a win. You keep that hillbilly tooth as a trophy for being well trained and well prepared. And that's all that is. Imagine that. Hillbillies will start throwing stuff at. At you. You never know who's going to make a turn on you and be nuts. That guy that is in my neighborhood. That everybody. The killer that's walking loose in my rental neighborhood.

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

No, they got a picture of him, though, and he's out. And you know what he does?

[B]

Is it a sketch or is it.

[A]

No, it's. I think it's an AI drawing. But they know his name, so it might be his driver's license photo. But you know what he does? He befriends people. He's kind of a charming drifter, homeless guy guy, but he looks clean, he looks good. And he comes up, he's like, hey, I just run into a little trouble. Can I get some help? Blah, blah. Will you give me a ride to this? Will you give me a ride to that? And he's charmed people, evidently, into like, well, I just need a place to stay, if you got any. If you got room for me, I'll pay you. If it's just one night. And he slaughtered some old man who took him in. That's what they're assuming this was, that he's a. They called him a charming drifter. Now, you could be at Circle King and some guy comes up to you and he's a super nice guy and he seems legit, and the next thing you know, you know, he's in your house. You've made eight errors at that point, and they teach you that kind of stuff right away. Nobody you meet in the parking lot of anything is enough to like, make them your house guests. Just know the world is crazy and it's looking at you. And you can make yourself a victim like that guy did. Unfortunately, he lost his life because he's like, let's get you to my house. Oh, boy. Always be aware. Head on a swivel and start being a sheepdog. You look like a victim, you're gonna get treated like a victim. Don't do it. And you can learn how well. Jesus. What the hell is that? Are we under attack? What is that? I have no idea. Oh, boy. The radio station's broken his Mic's dead. We'll go to the commercial here and get this off we're going to blow up. We'll see in a little while's morning sickness. I think we fixed it. Yeah right. Thanks. We don't know our engineer won't come up here when I'm here.

[B]

We fix it we figured out where.

[A]

It was coming from the engineer hates me so he won't come up here while I'm in the room yeah we just turned off the thing that was doing it it and he said I'll try to fix it from my he's like 18ft away but he won't busy I I'll try it through the computer otherwise tell John to off so I had to move Brett. Brett's in a different spot now. I just don't like. I just don't like the balance anyway. I don't either reactdefense.com cuz you never know what's going to come after yeah when your radio station attacks you. Sorry about that. To all you with tender ears that hurt. Imagine having headphones on when that went off. Anyway, Brady, please entertain me.

[B]

Here are some of the biggest rockers that have what there's what it says on their grave markers. Some.

[A]

Okay. They're tombstones.

[B]

Chris Cornell. It says voice of our generation and an artist of all time and beloved husband. Husband and father. Ronnie James Dio.

[A]

Little fella.

[B]

The man on the Silver Mountain.

[A]

Oh geez. I think Chris Catero made that gravestone. Yeah, no kidding. He's been he chisels those in his spare time which is all the time.

[B]

Dimebag.

[A]

Ouch.

[B]

He came. He came to rock and roll like no other.

[A]

Duck. Yeah.

[B]

With the heart twice the size of Texas. Our beloved brother, companion, mentor, idol and friend.

[A]

Biggest. This tombstone.

[B]

We love you dime until we meet again.

[A]

And then on the bottom it says P S you Ohio.

[B]

His brother Vinnie Paul.

[A]

Ditto.

[B]

Don't ever think it's not a good time. But if you don't think it's not a good time, the time is a good time.

[A]

I now want to be buried and I want a tombstone that just has a thumb that says what he said to the one neck whoever it is next to me. I don't even care if I knew him or not.

[B]

A bad time is a bad time and a wonderful time is irreplaceable.

[A]

Is this video Jesus. You have to turn a page on the tombstone.

[B]

Let me. For Motorhead.

[A]

That's indecipherable. It's not gay. If you don't push Back. You nailed it. That's it. I told you.

[B]

Born to lose, live to win.

[A]

So they take friends of his, took lyrics and they just plaster all over that stuff. That's silly. You know what Brady's is going to say? Thanks for the kidneys. Because if he doesn't get one, it's going to be soon. Thanks for the. It'll say. You know what it should say? You should blame someone. Thanks for the kidney, Corey. And people be like, what happened to this guy? I like going through cemeteries and wondering what that means. My friend Kevin got hit by a cab and it said, God called him home early, early. And I'm like, in a cab that he didn't see coming. He called the cab. God called the cab. I think.

[B]

Pete Davidson will appear on the season premiere Shark Tank to offer a stake in a company called Double Soul. They make socks interesting. He said he tried a pair while back and like, they're so good. I gotta meet the guys that made him. So he's like, I want to be involved in your company. Company. They're selling 4% of the company for 500 grand.

[A]

Wow. So they need Shark Tank for. They got Pete Davidson. Exactly. We like, somebody came out. I think it was somebody. Brian Hansen said, I like the idea of Kidney Tank where people pitch Brady on the offer of like, what he would have to. Like to sell the kidney to Brady and like, what he'd have to do in return. By the way, the tombstone thing at Lost Our Home Pet Rescue, you can buy little tiles and have a message sent to your dog after it passes or anything you want, want. And so many of them are like, to our beloved Sheila. She was amazing. We love you. We'll miss you. I'm going to miss you, Riley. Those kind of things. And then one stands out. It's the biggest one. And it says to King, I'm so sorry I failed you. And all I have. All I have is questions. That's all I have. Amy and I walk through there every Thursday and just go, what happened to King?

[B]

We got a celebrity death. Giorgio Armani, 91 years old.

[A]

I found out yesterday that Giorgio Armani was only around for the last 40 something years. That if like, I'm older than Armani suit.

[B]

It looks good.

[A]

Well, he's dead. That's a picture before. That's the before is much better than today. Much rather be his older. Yeah, yeah, maybe be. But I did you didn't you think Armani was like a brand for hundreds of years to be as unbelievably important and influential.

[B]

I thought it been around a long time. 1975, it's his.

[A]

And it started in 75. That's getting it done. Because by the third year, it was a thing. It was what Richard Gere was wearing, an American gigolo. And everybody's like, get me those suits. And American gigolo in Hollywood got hold of Armani 20s and it became the suit. He did all the suits for Dinero and Casino. Yeah, yeah. Like 60 of them. It's incredible how fast that company went from like not existing to the standard.

[B]

Tennis legend Bjorn Borg has prostate cancer.

[A]

That's uplifting.

[B]

The last little thing is Foreigner posted an open letter letter asking to play Travis or Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey's wedding.

[A]

Foreigner wants to do it Cold as ice Foreigner. Yet they want that gig with Lou or not.

[B]

They posted an open letter on Instagram saying that in Taylor's life of Showgirl, the color scheme saying, dear Taylor Swift and Travis Kelsey, we know what love is. We've spent 40 years figuring it out.

[A]

Out. Now you guys have to asking the question. I want to know what love is. They can sing that to you. If Micker Lou isn't there, you might as well hire Sandler's cover band. That's what it all is. Yeah. Sodomizing Li will sing a Foreigner song to you for a hundred grand. That's pretty good idea though. Hey, you don't hit any pitches you don't swing at, so you might as well take a poke at that if you're Foreigner. And like, maybe they'll let us know do it. My guess is Taylor Swift knows better bands. Yeah, you'd think she might have Beyonce singing for all. Look pretty stupid. You can open up for men at work or so like if. If, if Christopher Cross is like love to sing at your wedding anyway. All right, there you go. So far so good. Nothing blew up. The engineer still hasn't wait for that random buzz. The other day the air conditioner was broken. And then something was busted in this room. And I walked by him and I said, hey, can I add one more thing to your list today? And he goes, nope. And he left like, okay, well, he hates you. Hates me. Palpable loves those KSLX guys. He hates these cans. He hates me. He loves the cans, but he hates me. It's 9:36. We got a Guadalupe squares coming up. An NFL version of the Guadalupe Squares is right around the corner. Thrillers here. He's going to host it and we'll get that together. All we need is a girl and A boy. Boy to play said squares. What's on the list? You know what's on the docket? No idea. I had to move. I saw. Oh, yeah, you're away from your computer. All right, I'll get it. Do we have Lincoln park in there at all? No, no, I think it's. I think it's Nine Inch Nails. Oh, Nine Inch Nails. One second. I will. Oh, Brett might have Nine Inch Nails tickets in his. Then again, I may not. It may be a C teaser. Come on, come on, come on, come on. That would be a good one. Nine Inch Nails. A good price. Anyway, we need a boy and we need a girl. 5 8, 5, 9, 800 is the number. Nine Inch Nails tickets on the line. Oh, my God. They did the soundtrack for Tron, the new movie that's coming out. Oh, I want to see this. I haven't seen Nine Inch Nails ever. That would be a great one. That'd be fun to watch. All right, well, there you go. Maybe the person who wins will take me. Girl Guy Square's coming up next. Hey, it's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this for you. PD Convers. Morning sickness. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's. No, he's not. Ev. Just a bit rude. There we go. It's corn right there. It's coming undone. It's the description of our studio. It's haunted, Corey. It definitely is trying to kill itself. Thriller's here. He's ready to go. And it is definitely trying to eliminate itself from our lives. That was creepy. My ears are still buzzing. Here, a little bit of the tinnitus for you there. I can. I can turn it right back on any. Anytime anybody wants. I found it. Oh, gosh, no. Found the little forest fire that lives inside our studio, apparently here. Whenever I get tired of you, that's. I'm buzzing you off now. Toledo can just do that, too. It's time now for your Guadalupe Squares. And my goodness, aside from being the NFL squares, for crying out loud, Nine Inch Nails on the board. They were all part of the game last night through the advertisements for the new Tron movie that's coming out with Brady's, right? Jared Leto, who looks the same as he's always looked. The dude's, like, 60, and he still looks like he's 23. But that. And. I'm not interested in the Tron movie, but I want to hear the Soundtrack, and you can go hear most of it live. I got an email from a guy that said, I saw them in Oakland when they started this tour back in August. He's flying here to Phoenix to watch Nine Inch Nails again. It was so good. So those tickets are on the docket for you today if. And you're interested. That's how it works. Well, in the meantime, if you're not, you're still, you know, part of the game, so you might as well try. Here's your host of the guy squares, Mr. Corey, with Thriller Walsh. Thriller. Thank you, Chancellor. Let's begin Top Life Square. Jerry Jones joining us. Trailer I have. Thank you very much. First of all, I just want to say thanks, you guys, for watching my Dallas Cowboys. Great documentary. Great game. Last. Great documentary. Don't you think I should probably win stuff for that? I do. What happened last night, I was watching. We. We. We were toe to toe with the Philadelphia Eagles last night. That's exactly what happened.

[B]

Spit on anybody?

[A]

No, I didn't, but Dak did exactly as I said. I said, pick the biggest person on their team and spit at them and see if he can get him kicked out. And he did it. And then CD Lamb grew alligator arms at the end of game. We lost the game. Corey, can you play linebacker? Because I make solid trades. The absolute position. You don't want me. I think you should rush the quarterback. It would be scary as hell to have Corey coming after you. I think limping and dragging that leg, running at you and doing that kind of thing. So Dallas Cowboys lost their first game. We got that out the way. Yeah, but you have a whole season for a reason, right? 16 and. Oh, from here on out, it's a real season. Hey, Daddy. Yeah, what is it, Steven? My son Steven wants a mushboard. Not right now, Steven. Daddy's busy. But there's no way you come from my loins. You don't got time for that crap. When I got home, I'm gonna punch your mama right in the mouth there, Stephen. All right, that's it. Just hillbilly humor right there. Okay, thank you, Thriller. No worries. On now to the top middle square. We go over to oj. Hey, how you doing there, Thriller? Hey, what's going on, buddy? Is it warm down there? Well, yeah, it's real warm down. It's nice, but it's warm. I said hey to your dad the other day, Brady.

[B]

Oh, is that right?

[A]

Couldn't believe it. He came Tor's. A big fan of OJ's. Doesn't believe I did it cuz. I just said so. Very trusting.

[B]

So invite you to the club?

[A]

Yeah. Well, no, he would not invite me to the club. He said people like me aren't allowed in this club. That's what he told me. I don't know what that means. Murderers or. I think that's who he has. You better say. You better hope murderers. Cuz the other thing I'm going to tell you. Chop chop. So I'm winning the fantasy football league down here in hell. Okay. And I could. I think Jerry Jones should trade for me. I think. Think I'm. I'm as good as the guy they got. I mean, I still can't stop the run. Yeah. I mean. I mean, put me in the backfield. I mean, what can it hurt, right? Who gets hurt when OJ's around? Nobody. It's like it's okay to have me. Yeah. Just for the love of the game, you know? Only thing you break is records. That's exactly. Cory. I could have said it better myself. Where were you back in 94? I needed you not even close to born, sir. My long team. Well, that's all right because a spirit was here and that went away. And maybe it caused you. That's what happened. And I can help bring babies to the planet. That's exactly how I see that. Anyway. All right, don't get him there, Corey. I'm just saying. Happy fantasy football season over. Now. Top right square President Trump. How are you, sir? I am great, thank you, Corey. I blew up some druggies. That was a fun, fun week this week. I really, I. You know, Jerry Jones team might not be able to stop the run, but I can stop the drug run, that's for sure. And I do it with military power. Some people, Brady, some people out there calling it murder that I used our military against some civilians in the middle of the ocean. And I don't know. Even the way they get that Brett's people have been doing this for years. Nobody ever calls it murder. They call it. They call it good business. They call it good business. And that's what I'm doing for the state. If you're in a boat and I don't like the boat, I blow the boat up. And then we put drugs all around you. It's been going on for ages. I think that's great.

[B]

Take your cash.

[A]

That's exactly right. We'll take the cash. We'll take. Take that, you know, green. Green floats. That's what I say. Also, I'm a big football guy. You may or May not know that, Corey. I was. I was a owner of a football team called the New Jersey Generals. That sounds fake. New Jersey Generals. Very real. Was it real? It was real. Of course it was great. People say it was the best team ever assembled. Herschel Walker. It's a beautiful team. Doug Flutie was the quarterback. Spent a lot of money. A lot of money. New Jersey Generals, that's what I was. And we beat the Chicago Blitz. Remember that team? That terrible team. Team. Wnba. My bad. No, no, no. This is the usfl. United States. I've always been in charge of it. Always been in charge of the usfl. We went to Chicago, the league. The. We played the blitz. The blitz. And the whole team was shot to death by liberal Chicago politicians. Bad plan. So Chicago killed the New Jersey Generals. Luckily Hersel and Doug got out. But I know football, Cory. I know it's well. And I know not to travel to Chicago because big fat pricks are. Is that his name? Governor Pricksker? I believe that's it. I think you got it. And that terrible mayor whose name I can't pronounce. It's like an eye chart. They just want crime in their streets. And all I want to do is militarize the entire town. I don't know what everybody's complaining about. Okay, Cory, I'm done. And don't worry. Speaking of no.1 footballers, how about over a middle of square? Bill Belichick. I had a rough week. Yeah, what happened man? Had a football game on my. Bill. Let me have the phone. I think you guys have talked to Bill long enough, don't you? Get out of here. Jordan. My girlfriend Jordan. And don't tell her to get out of here. Bill. Is that man over there going to talk to me like that? Say another word like that to my girlfriend and pull your other kidney out. You son of a. Don't.

[B]

Sorry, coach.

[A]

That's better. Bill. Do you have any more questions for Bill? What's your plan for week two? We agreed we wouldn't talk about that this week. Yeah, Jordan's right. We talked about that before the show. We're not going to talk about about that. Are you done here? Cuz Bill is. You son of a. Yeah, I lost the game on Monday, but I guarantee I got blown more than lost. Five times more than you guys did this week. Yeah. Worth it. It's totally worth it to have a. A 20 year old girlfriend. You know I used to have Ed. Oh really? Back when I was with my old wife. You know what cures Ed? What's that 20 year olds. Yeah. Jordan, what is it, honey? I think you. I think we both know. What are you talking about? Do I have to say it? I love when you say it. Do your job. Oh, yeah. We're onto Indianapolis. All righty. Indianapolis. The nickname of my dick. Over now to the middle square. Oxy. Brady. How are you feeling? Bob? What's going on? Dragonface, how was recovery? Oh, man. Dragonface recovering, brother. I can fly. Really? Yeah. I'm flying right now, Cory. Oh. Oh, hey, Corey. When you walk. Yeah? It's art.

[B]

Oh.

[A]

It's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. That's very kind. It's like a ballerina unbalanced stage and you're just waiting for something to crack. Corey, did you know you're covered in tarantulas? No. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Okay, now I understand why all those poor people do this stuff. This is the happiest I've ever been. You should get what I've got. Yeah, add that to the mix. Holy smokes. Oh, man. Okay, Cory, put this wig on and call yourself Jordan. We're going to town, brother. I might be too old for that, Cory. I'm out of office, Moxy. Oh, I can't get you more. You can. No, No, I can't. Oh, just gone to the sales department. They'll hook you up. Do you have any money in your pocket? No, I have. I will you for 20 bucks. Sorry, Bud, I can't hook you up like that. Hey. Yeah, Belichick. What is it, Brady? Does Jordan shave? No, we keep it old school. Hair Jordan. Oh, man, these drugs are awkward. Awesome. I'm kicking ass taking names. All right, lizard man.

[B]

I'll let you kind of enjoy the.

[A]

Rest of your trip. The floor is yours. Pogo stick over now with a middle right square. Shannon Sharp up next. Yep, yep, yep, yep, yep. I got some questions for you. I'm not skipping it. Go ahead. Yep, yep. Yes.

[B]

Club Shay Shay.

[A]

Big fan Club Shay Shay gonna be on podcast today. Brady gonna be on the podcast. We're gonna get Brady a kidney on Club Shay Shay. Oh, Brett. Yeah, Brett. Brett. The B to the R to the E to the T. Brett, what's your favorite football team? The Bears. Enjoy baseball. That's a good one, Chase. Say, make a joke. That's hilarious. Skip, Skip, Skip, Skip. You can't skip. You can't skip. There's no way you can skip. There's no skipping on Cory World. Cory Watt can't skip half this room. Cancer. Skip, we could skip. Brady can't skip. Tummy will fall off. How many minutes left in the show? Let's see. 1, 2, 3, 4. Yep, yep. I need a sugar cube. Somebody give me a sugar cube. All right, how about over? That's what I said. You heard me. Fair enough. Don't get on me right now. Me? Yep. On with the show, Skip. Alrighty, then. Brady.

[B]

Secret square.

[A]

Give us a hint.

[B]

How you fellers doing? I'm 67 years old. My birthday today. I'm a comedian. I was on the Blue Collar Comedy Tour. You might be a redneck.

[A]

Oh, all right.

[B]

If you cut your grass and you find a car.

[A]

Like that one. Thanks, Jeff. That's a good one. I like that. Over knowledge we have Bottom of the square. Hello there, Mahomes. You know, I like to sing on this show. That's what I like to sing. Singing's my favorite thing too. We're down here in Brazil and I'm gonna do a show. Coach Mahomes taking on San Diego Chargers. And even though they're not San Diego anymore. Let's do it. I'm traveling down the road and flirting with disaster Got the pedal to the floor My life is running faster and. Hey, you.

[B]

Great halftime.

[A]

You look just like Andy Reid. Are you Andy Reid? I think that's my coach over there, Andy Reed.

[B]

You gonna finish those fries?

[A]

You can have my nuggets. Better not eat those. Chiefs win tonight. Probably gonna win the game. Probably about 38 to 7. That's my guess right there. That's what I think. So I should gamble? I think that's it. Probably gambling. Probably a bad idea. But you gamble on teeth, they're gonna win it all. We're gonna be in super bowl again.

[B]

How's Britney?

[A]

Brittany's good. She's lucky. Jealous of Travis's girlfriend. She's around a lot. Oh, Beyonce. How dare you? Yeah, well, always happen to have. Yeah. Over. Now the bottom. Right square. Our Lord and savior. Trippy. Doop, doop, doobie. You're fired. Just kidding, Brady. I just wanted to play the game. Oh, man. He put the fear of death into the druggie. Goodness gracious. Brady. Brady. Yes? Should you be driving?

[B]

Yes.

[A]

No. Brady, you are like a woman to me. Oh, there we go. No, you just shouldn't be driving. No, I didn't want. It was like a big statement. I think you guys were waiting for a punchline. It's true. On with the show. Okay, let's hop on over to our phones now. Let's see who we got today. I don't know.

[B]

Oh, shoot.

[A]

I told you. Jim and Melissa. Oh, Jim is there. Jim, are you there? Jim is there. Are you there, Jim? Yes. All right. Melissa, are you there? I'm here. I am. You can't hear me. How come all I get is static? That can't be true. It's blowing up. Oh, boy. We were worried about that. Is it really? That's kind of. Kind of better. Is it? What if I do this? Oh, God. There. No. Is that better? Not really. How about now? Yes, yes, yes. There you go. All right, I fixed it. I'm like an engineer that likes me. All right, go right ahead, Melissa. You pick a square. Go up. Can I do Jeff Foxworthy? Oh, well, that's a square. There you are. X gets the square. Or do you start. There you are, redneck. On the way over to Jim here, make your choice. Do Oxy Brady. All right, Oxy Brady there in the center. You like football, carrot head? Sure. Yeah, I like football too. My balls are one foot. I'm looking at them right now. They're spreading across the floor like pancakes. Uh oh. The floor's hot lava. The floor's hot lava. All right, focus. I got a question for you, man. Got a question for you. I have hamster. Hamster nipples. Milk my hamster nipples. And that's a new shirt we gotta sell, Darn it. Oh, no. Now my ham has nipples too. And it makes ham milk. Oh, God. Have you ever had ham milk on a hot summer day? It's delightful. I like those. All right, jackalope with headphones, tell me, all right, what is your query? Being lonely. Signs point to yes. Being lonely has a more damaging effect on your health rather than obesity. Why are you asking me that, jerk? I'm working on it. Welcome to planet Brady, where all the chocolate is free and it's served in the back. So open your mouth and prepare yourself. Although I'm on oxy, so I'm a little bit constipated. It's like giving birth to a bowling ball. It's tough stuff. All right, I'll say being lonely has more. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Being fat is not as detrimental as being Larry. I mean, lonely. Okay, so you are saying.

[B]

True.

[A]

Now, Jim, do you agree or disagree with true? I agree. Correct. So we'll get that square. Never question me again. Over. Now back to Melissa. Make your choice. I'm gonna go with Mahomes. All right, Patrick. Mahomes. All right, we get the. You want to say you gonna vote for the Chiefs tonight in any sort of fanduel bets? Or anything like that. What are you gonna do? Gotta keep the music. Get me there. I am Feel the same almost every day Da da da da da da yeah, back. My home down here in Brazil. Just entertaining the hell out of everybody. Trying to get on Taylor Swift's next record. If you want me on there. You think I'm a good singer? Wait till you hear this. Here we go. Speeding down the fast lane. Honey, we're playing from town to town. Brazil right now, boys. And I burned it up since the. To slow it down. Take it, Travis. Oh, wait, he's busy. All right, I got a question for you, man. All right, go ahead. I'm waiting on you. French school children were once allowed four glasses of wine per day. French kids drinking wine? That's fine by me. All right, I'll say yes. I'm turning to Ralphie by the second. Let's go. No match. Except for what you plan to be here? Yeah. Patrick. My home's in Travis. Kelsey going to win a ring. We're traveling down that lonesome road all the way to Brazil. I'm going to have sex with a hot girl with a wiener. Oh, that's implied, right? It's Brazil. All right, so you're saying. True. Now back to Crazy Patrick Mahomes. Melissa, do you agree or disagree? I'm gonna agree. Correct. X gets the spam. All right, Jimmy can go to Trip for the block. You got a ring on your finger, Melissa? Because I got three. No, I don't. Uh. Oh, somebody's nuts. That ain't me. All right, so Jim going for Trip. Let's see what we got for him. Yeah, I like when Mahomes sings.

[B]

Loop.

[A]

I don't know the words to that one. I'm not a hillbilly. All right, go ahead. My question for you here, Alcohol Corey in your trailer park, do they play that song a lot? I don't live in a trailer park. Oh, you're homeless now? No, no, no, no. You might be a Red. You might be. You might be redneck adjacent. Well, look at the tax bracket. You'll find out. Oh, all right. All right. Redneck alcohol sales in the US account for almost 8% of our GDP. True or false. And I account for almost 8% of the alcohol sales in America. I'll say true. 8% of the gross domestic product. Did you know that? Yes. Yeah. Do you know what your dad called your mom? A gross domestic product. Thank you for following along.

[B]

You're welcome.

[A]

Come out slowly. Yes, but that's what I do. Oh, a greyhound. Hi, Greyhound. Not a real one. Calm down. Booze druggie. Yeah, I like a gray. All right, so you are saying. True. Now for the block here. Jim, do you agree or disagree? I am going to agree. Incorrect. X gets the square and the win. Do you know what your dad called your mom's vagina after she turned 50? 50. What's that? A greyhound. Yeah, because it had fleas. O. That's most trailer park. Trailer park Vagina is a good band name. I'm the lead singer. All right. Bye, Corey. Yeah. Good to see you, sir. Have a great day. We need to talk. In my office. Oh. Oh. All right. They're off. She won. Yeah. Easy killed. Well, that was just easy. Yep. Thank goodness. What did you just say? Thank goodness. Get out. Get out. It's evidently a mic processor exploded. I thought he was going to turn it off. When I leave, when I'm out of the room, he'll be in here. Watch. Just stay till fit the show the guy just linger around. I'll become a malingerer. By the way, the simulation, I told you earlier this week that it was completely broken. Broken? When I found out the guy running for governor in New Jersey's name was Jack Schiarelli. I know. It moved. And then bo yi poons doing weather and we had all sorts of weird simulation problems. Now for sure, I know it's broken. Conor McGregor's running for president of Ireland. Oh. And I'm. He's. He's got good support. I was like, oh, this is silly. I just looked at a poll. He's. He's doing okay. Really. I figured maybe 2%. And then you realize, oh, God, they're out Irish. They're stupid and they love fighting. This is not going to be good. Yeah, because he said he'll stand face to face with any world leader. You know that's going to end in a punch, Right? Or a headbutt. EB lines for North Korea. Oh, yeah. Got to take care of narc Korea real quick. That mother owes us money. All right, let's get out of here. Corey, you got anything going this weekend? Yes. Rising tonight. And then we have NAU football tomorrow, Phoenix Rising soccer tonight on the radio.

[B]

Great night.

[A]

Oh, man. And people say radio is not doing well. Forget it. What kind of numbers you pulling over there? Two, three people? A decent amount. Yeah, that would be surprising if you got to three. I might listen to that if you want them. Who calls the game?

[B]

Is there a theme night?

[A]

Let's two of air on? I think. No, next time is Latino Heritage Night. Is next time. I forget what tonight is. It's every night. It's soccer. It's soccer. I mean, why bother? They should have Anglo Heritage Night. That would be a special evening. But if you go, you get $1 beers. Does everybody get a pair of Umbros and, like, a boyfriend when they leave? Thank you. No, no, not this game. They get a KDKB sticker and a number. Do you simulcast on kdkb? No. You shouldn't have four listeners. Well, yeah, we'd still, you know, but they'd all be targeting the audience. Gotta hit soccer, football tonight. We. You're. Do you think anybody's gonna listen to a Rising game? Sure. Yeah. You're insane. If you like sports. Yeah. Well, maybe the Raiders aren't playing tonight, so, you know, I mean, Chargers and, you know. Yeah. I don't know. Soccer on the Radio. Soccer on the Radio is a good band name. And we're all good. Just want to give this guy a shout out. Jim Manley, once again, the nicest man in the world. Doing this just because of us. And I think that's nice. Nice. He's. He's climbed on to what. What I love as a charity. Lost Her Home Pet Rescue. And he's doing a charity show at Cactus Jacks. Tonight or tomorrow. I'm sorry. Tomorrow at 6. Go over there and just hang out and have fun, have beers and help out the nicest man in the world who's doing this just because he is and lost Her Home Pet Rescue wins in the end, which is never a bad thing. I'm probably gonna pop over there, check it out. Six o'. Clock. Be down there. Thriller. Come on. Oh, he's got a Rising game. Oh, that's tomorrow. Tomorrow. No, no, tomorrow's Nau Foot Football. Lumberjacks. Tomorrow. Choices. Okay, well, I'm definitely. I'll put it on in the car on my way home. You should. It's fun. There's a cliff close to Cactus Jacks. Is there anywhere I could drive off? Like, South Mountain's close. Yeah, I'll just hop up there. That's it. We're done. Larry's next. You guys have a great day. We'll see you Monday. So long. It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee. I have heard enough of this. And Doug Limu and I always tell you to customize your car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. But now we want you to feel it. Cue the emu music. Limu. Save yourself money today. Increase your wealth. Customize and save. We save. That may have been too much feeling. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty Liberty Liberty Liberty Savings Fairy Unwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company excludes Massachusetts Yes, Mr. Gecko, you're a huge inspiration to us all.

[B]

But who was your muse?

[A]

Oh, my dear old Nat. She imparted many wise words to me. She would say, never let the fame get to your head. Always remember who you are and let people get more than just savings. With Geico's fast and friendly claim support, I lived up to her advice and now anyone can file a claim anywhere and anytime. I miss her so much. Did she go somewhere? Extended quilting trip. Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico.