← Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
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Dig into crispy fried pickles, juicy wings or a cheeseburger and wash it all down with an ice cold fountain drink or upgrade to a cocktail or Buzzballs for just a few bucks more. Don't forget to pick your player with Big Daddy drafts of Michelob Ultra or light for only $4, or do Equis for just $5. Hooters has the food, drinks and game day vibes. Hooters, where the party always kicks off. Morning sickness. You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself. He's evil sitting right here. Come on. No, no, he's not. He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. There we go. It's corn right there. It's coming undone. It's the description of our studio. It's haunted, Corey. It definitely is trying to kill itself. Thriller's here. He's ready to go. And it is definitely trying to eliminate itself from our lives. That was creepy. My ears are still buzzing here. A little bit of the tinnitus for you there. I can. I can turn it right back on anytime anybody wants. I found it. Oh, gosh, no. Found the little forest fire that lives inside our studio, apparently here. Whenever I get tired of you. That's why I'm buzzing you off now. Toledo can just do that, too. It's time now for your Guadalupe Squares. And my goodness, aside from being the NFL Squares, for crying out loud, Nine Inch Nails on the board. They were all part of the game last night through the advertisements for the new Tron movie that's coming out with Brady's, right, Jared Leto, who looks the same as he's always looked. The dude's like 60, and he still looks like he's 23. But that. I'm not interested in the Tron movie, but I want to hear the soundtrack. And you can go hear most of it live. I got an email from a guy that said, I saw them in Oakland when they started this tour back in August. He's flying here to Phoenix to watch Nine Inch Nails again. It was so good. So those tickets are on the docket for you today if. And you're interested. That's how it works. Well, in the meantime, if you're not, you're still, you know, part of the game, so you might as well try. Here's your host of The Guadalupe squares, Mr. Corey, with Thriller Walsh. Thriller. Thank you, Chancellor. Let's begin. Top left square. Jerry Jones joining us. I have. Thank you very much. First of all, I just want to say thanks, you guys, for watching my Dallas Cowboys. Great documentary. Great game. Last. Great documentary. Don't you think I should probably win stuff for that? I do. What happened last night, I was watching. We were toe to toe with Philadelphia Eagles last night. That's exactly what happened on anybody. No, I didn't, but Dak did exactly as I said. I said pick the biggest person on their team and spit at them and see if you can get them kicked out. And he did it. And then CD Lamb grew alligator arms at the end of game. We lost the game. Corey, can you play linebacker? Because I make solid trades. The absol position. You don't want me I think you should rush the quarterback. It would be scary as hell to have Corey coming after you, I think, limping and dragging that leg, running at you and doing that kind of thing. So, Dallas Cowboys lost their first game. We got that out the way. Yeah. But you have a whole season for a reason, right? 16 and. Oh, from here on out, it's a real season. Yeah. What is it, Stephen? My son Steven wants a much. But not right now, Stephen. Daddy's busy. But there's no way you come from my loins. You don't got time for that crap. When I got home, I'm gonna punch your mama right in the mouth there, Stephen. All right, that's it. Just hillbilly humor right there. Okay, thank you, Thriller. No worries. On now to the top middle square. We go over to oj. Hey, how you doing there, Thriller? Hey, what's going on down there? Well, yeah, it's real warm down. It's nice, but it's warm. I said hey to your dad the other day, Brady. Oh, is that right? Couldn't believe it. He came up top's. A big fan of OJ's. Doesn't believe I did it because I just said so. Very trusting. So invite you to the club? Yeah. Well, no, he would not invite me to club. He said people like me aren't allowed in this club. That's what he told me. I don't know what that means. Murderers or. I think that's better. You better hope murderers, because the other thing I'm gonna tell you. Chop, chop. So I'm winning the fantasy football league down here in hell. Okay. And I could. I think Jerry Jones should trade for me. I think I'm. I'm as good as the guy they got. I mean, I still can't stop the run. I mean. I mean, put me in the backfield. I mean, what can it hurt, right? Who gets hurt when OJ's around? Nobody. It's like it's okay to have me. Love of the game. Yeah. Just for the love of the game, you know? Only thing you break is records. That's exactly, Cory. I could have said it better myself. Where were you back in 94? I needed you. Not even close to boring, sir. My long team. Well, that's all right, because a spirit was here and that went away and maybe it's. It caused you. That's what happened. And I can help bring babies to the planet. That's exactly how I see that. Anyway. All right, don't get them there, Court. I'm just saying. Happy fantasy football Season over. Now, top right square, President Trump. How are you, sir? I am great, thank you, Corey. I blew up some druggies. That was a fun, fun week this week. I really, I. You know, Jerry Jones team might not be able to stop the run, but I can stop the drug run, that's for sure. And I do it with military power. Some people, Brady, some people out there calling it murder that I used our military against some civilians in the middle of the ocean. And I don't know even where they get that. Bretz, people have been doing this for years. Nobody ever calls it murder. They call it. They call it good business. They call it good business. And that's what I'm doing for the state. If you're in a boat and I don't like the boat, I blow the boat up. And then we put drugs all around you. It's been going on for ages. I think that's great. Take your cash. That's exactly right. We'll take the cash. We'll take that. They are green. Green floats. That's what I say. Also, I'm a big football guy. You may or may not know that, Corey. I was. I was a owner of a football team called the New Jersey Generals. That sounds fake. New Jersey Generals, very real. Was it real? It was real. Of course. Brad Batch. Great. People say it was the best team ever assembled. Herschel Walker. It's a beautiful team. Doug Flutie was the quarterback. Spent a lot of money. A lot of money. New Jersey Generals, that's what I was. And we beat the Chicago Blitz. Remember that team? That terrible team? Wnba. No, no, no. This is the usfl. United States. I've always been in charge of it. Always been in charge of the usfl. We went to Chicago, the league. We played the blitz, the blitz. And the whole team was shot to death by liberal Chicago politicians. Bad plans. So Chicago killed the New Jersey Generals. Luckily, Herschel and Doug got up. But I know football, Corey. I know it well. And I know not to travel to Chicago, cuz. Big fat pricks. Is that his name? Governor Pricks? I believe that's it. I think you got it. And that terrible mayor whose name I can't pronounce. It's like an eye check. They just want crime in their streets. And all I want to do is militarize the entire town. I don't know what everybody's complaining about. Okay, Cory, I'm done. Yeah, no worries. We go no. 1 football. How about over a middle of square? Bill Belichick. I had a rough week. Yeah? What happened? Well, I had a football game on my. Bill, let me have the phone. I think you guys have talked to Bill long enough, don't you? Get out of here, Jordan. My girlfriend. Jordan, don't tell her to get out of here. Bill. Does that man over there gonna talk to me like that? Say another word like that to my girlfriend, I'll pull your other kidney out, you son of a bitch. Don't. Sorry, coach. That's better. Bill, do you have any more questions for Bill? What's your plan for week two? We agreed we wouldn't talk about that this week. Yeah, Jordan's right. We talked about that before the show. We're not gonna talk about that. Are you done here? Cause Bill is. You son of a bitch. Yeah, I lost the game on Monday, but I guarantee I got blown more than lost. Five times more than you guys did this week. Yeah, worth it. It's totally worth it to have a 20 year old girlfriend. You know, I used to have Ed. Oh, really? Back when I was with my old wife. You know what cures Ed? What's that? 20 year olds. Yeah, Jordan, what is it? Honey, I think we both know what are you talking about? Do I have to say it? I love when you say it. Do your job. Oh, yeah. We're on to Indianapolis. All righty. Indianapolis is the nickname of my dick. Over now to the middle square. Oxy Brady. How are you feeling, bud? What's going on? Dragonface? How was recovery? Oh, man, Dragonface. Hi, recovering brother. I can fly. Really? Yeah. I'm flying right now, Cory. Oh. Ooh. Hey, Cory, when you walk. Yeah? It's art. Oh, it's the most beautiful thing I've ever seen. That's very kind. It's like a ballerina. Unbalanced stage. And you're just waiting for something to crack. Cory, did you know you're covered in tarantulas? No. The most beautiful thing I've ever seen. Okay, now I understand why all those poor people do this stuff. This is the happiest I've ever been. You should get what I've got. Yeah, add that to the mix. Holy smokes. Oh, man. Okay, Corey, put this wig on and call yourself Jordan. We're going to town, brother. I might be too old for that. Cory, I'm out of oxy. Oh, I can't get you more. You can. No, no, I can't. Oh, just gone to the sales department. They'll hook you up. Do you have any money in your pocket? No, I have. I will you for 20 bucks. Sorry, Bud. I can't hook you up like that. Hey. Yeah, Belichick. What is it, Brady? Does Jordan shave? No, we keep it old school. Hair Jordan. Oh, man, these drugs are awesome. I'm kicking ass, taking names. All right, lizard man. I'll let you kind of enjoy the rest of your trip. The floor is yours, Pogo stick. Over now with the middle right square. Shannon Sharpe up next. Yep, yep, yep, yep. I got some questions for you. I'm not scared, but go ahead. Yep, yep. Yes. Club Shay Shay. Big fan club. Chase ain't gonna be on podcast today. Brady gonna be on the podcast. We're gonna get Brady a kidney on club chasing. Oh, Brett. Yeah, Brett, Brett. The B to the R to the E to the T. Brett, what's your favorite football team? The Bears. Enjoy baseball. That's a good one. That's hilarious. Skip, Skip, skip, Skip. You can't skip. You can't skip. There's no way you can skip. There's no skipping on Cory World. Cory Watt can't skip. Half this room can't. Yep, we can skip. Brady can't skip. Tummy will fall off. How many minutes left in the show? Let's see. 1, 2, 3, 4. Skip. Skip. I need a sugar cube. Somebody give me a sugar cube. All right, hopping over to. That's what I said. You heard me. Fair enough. Don't get on me right now. You heard me. Skip. On with the show, Skip. All righty, then. Brady's secret spirit. Give us a hint. How you fellers doing? I'm 67 years old. My birthday today. I'm a comedian. I was on the Blue Collar Comedy tour. You might be a redneck. Oh, all right. If you cut your grass and you find a car like that one. Thanks, Jeff. That's a good one. I like it over now. It's the abode of the square. Hello there, Mahomes. You know, I like to sing on this show. That's why I like to sing. Sing is my favorite thing to do. We're down here in Brazil, and I'm gonna do a show. Patrick Mahomes taking on San Diego Chargers. And even though they're not in San Diego anymore. Let's do it. I'm traveling down the road and flirting with disaster Got the pedal to the floor My life is running. Hey, you're a great halftime. You look just like Andy Reid. Are you Andy Reid? I think that's my coach over there, Andy Reid. You gonna finish those fries? You can have my nuggets. Better not eat those. Chiefs win tonight. Probably gonna win the game. Probably about 38 to 7. That's my guess right there. That's what I think. So I should gamble? I think that's it. Proper gambling. Perfectly Bad idea. But you gamble on the chiefs, they're gonna win it all. We're gonna be in super bowl again. How's Brittany? Brittany's good. She's a little jealous of Travis's girlfriend. She'. Beyonce. How dare you. PD Men. You take care of everyone else. Now let Limitless TRT and Aesthetics take care of you. Limitless TRT and Aestics is redefining sexual wellness by helping men reclaim their confidence with non surgical permanent male enhancement. The platinum procedure delivers instant permanent girth with minimal downtime. The p long protocol naturally adds length and girth. No gimmick, no guesswork, no surgery. Just proven solutions that transform how you feel and look. Book your free consultation online at limitlesstrtanesthetics.com let's make you the legend you were always meant to be. It's John Holmerg here from the morning sickness. And it's time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and Doug Hopkins dot com. Sometimes Doug Hopkins can be a savior for people in bad situations. Doug's there to help, and the process will go fast. Cash offer for your home as is, no matter the circumstances and a straight offer, the deal's done. Doug doesn't change that offer or cancel because of contingencies or any other reason and will back it up with a $5,000 guarantee. You can start the process online at Doug Hopkins.com or grab that phone and sing along. Call Doug Hopkins. 1-800-sale- now. Hey, everybody, it's John Holmberg from the morning sickness talking to Shane Orlando from Orlando Auto Body. Now, Shane, I take great pride in saying I stand with someone when I tell a listener to go to their shop. I know why. You tell me what's different for a KUPD listener to go to Orlando Auto Body than anywhere else? Well, first of all, we've been in the valley here for over 34 years. We do a quality job. We work for you, not the insurance. So that we can work together to make sure your listeners are getting the customer service they deserve. If your car's been wrecked and you need that thing fixed the right way, get on over there now. Orlandoautobody.com Holmberg's morning sickness al always happen to have. Yeah. Over now. The bottom right square. Our lord and savior, Triply. Doop doobie, doop, doop, doobie. You're fired. Just kidding, Brady. I just Wanted to play the game. Oh, man. Put the fear of death into the druggie goodness. Grace. Brady. Yes. Should you be driving? Yes. No. Brady, you are like a woman to me. Oh, there we go. No, you just shouldn't be driving. No, I didn't want. It was like a big statement. I think you guys were waiting for a punchline. It's true. On with the show. Okay, let's hop on over to our phones now. Let's see who we got today. I don't know. Oh, shoot. I told you. Jim and Melissa. Oh, Jim is there. Jim, are you there? Jim is there. Are you there, Jim? Yes. All right. Melissa, are you there? I'm here. I am. You can't hear me. How come all I get is static? That can't be true. It's blowing up. Oh, boy. We were worried about that. Is it really that kind of. Kind of better? Is it. What if I do this? Oh, God, no. Is that better? Not really. How about now? Yes. Yes, yes. There you go. All right, I fixed it. I'm like an engineer that likes me. All right, go right ahead, Melissa. You pick a square. Go up. Can I do Jeff Foxworthy? Oh, well, that's where. There you are. X gets the square. Or he could start there. For you are redneck. You found a way over to Jim here. Make your choice. Uh, let's do Oxy Brady. All right, Oxy Brady there in the center. You like football, carrot head? Sure. Yeah, I like football, too. My balls are one foot. I'm looking at them right now. They're spreading across the floor like pancakes. Uh oh. The floor's hot lava. The floor's hot lava. All right, focus. Got a question for you, man. Got a question for you. I have hamster nipples. Milk. My hamster nipples. That's a new shirt we gotta sell. Darn it. Oh, no. Now my ham has nipples, too. And it makes ham milk. Oh, God. Have you ever had ham milk on a hot summer day? That's delightful. I like those. All right, jackalope with headphones, tell me, all right. What is your queen? Being lonely? Signs point to yes, being lonely has a more damaging effect on your health rather than obesity. Why are you asking me that, jerk? I'm working on it. Welcome to planet Brady, where all the chocolate is free and it's served in the back. So open your mouth and prepare yourself. Although I'm on oxy, so I'm a little bit constipated. Like giving birth to a bowling ball. It's tough stuff. All right, I'll say. Being lonely has more. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Being fat is not as detrimental as being Larry. I mean, lonely. Okay, so you are saying true. Now, Jim, do you agree or disagree with true? I agree. Correct. So we'll get that square. Never question me again. Over. Now back to Melissa. Make your choice. I'm gonna go with Mahomes. All right, Patrick. Mahomes. All right, we get the. You want to sing? You gonna vote for the Chiefs tonight in any sort of fanduel bets or anything like that? What are you gonna do, Moose? Gotta keep the music. Get me there. I am Feel the same most every day Da da da da da da Back my home down here in Brazil Just entertaining the hell out of everybody. Trying to get on Taylor Swift's next record. If you want me on there. You think I'm a good singer? Wait till you hear this. Here we go. Speeding down the fast lane Honey, we're from town to town Brazil right now, boys. And I burn it up and seem to slow it down Take it, Travis. Oh, wait, he's busy. All right, I got a question for you, man. All right, go ahead. I'm waiting on you. French school children were once allowed four glasses of wine per day. French kids drinking wine. That's fine by me. All right, I'll say yes. I'm turning to Ralphie by the second. Let's go. No match. Except for what you plan to. Yeah. Patrick Mahomes and Travis Kelsey going to win a ring. We're traveling down that lonesome road all the way to Brazil. I'm going to have sex with a hot girl with a wiener. Oh, that's implied, right? It's Brazil. All right, so you're saying true. Now back to crazy Patrick Mahomes. Melissa, do you agree or disagree? Yeah, I'm gonna agree. Correct. X gets the spam. All right, Jimmy, go trip for the block. You got a ring on your finger, Melissa? Cause I got three. No, I don't. Uh. Oh, somebody's nuts. That ain't me. All right, so Jim going for trip. Let's see what we got for him. Yeah, I like when Mahomes sings. I don't know the words to that one. I'm not a hillbilly. All right, go ahead. Question for you here. Alcohol Corey in your trailer park. Do they play that song a lot? I don't live in a trailer park. Oh, you're homeless now? No, no, no, no. You might be a red. You might be. You might be redneck adjacent. Well, look at the tax bracket. You'll find out. All right, Right. All right. Redneck. Alcohol sales in the US account for almost 8% of our GDP. True or false. And I account for almost 8% of the alcohol sales in America. I'll say true. 8% of the gross domestic product. Did you know that? Yes. Yeah. Do you know what your dad called your mom? A gross domestic product. Thank you for following along. You're welcome. Slowly. Yes, but that's what I do. Oh, a greyhound. Hi, Greyhound. Not a real one. Calm down, booze druggie. Yeah, I like a gray. All right, so you are saying true. Now for the block here. Jim, do you agree or disagree? I am going to agree. Incorrect. X gets the square and the win. Do you know what your dad called your mom's vagina after she turned 50? What's that? A greyhound. I gave you the answer. Yeah, because it had fleas. Ooh. That's most trailer parks. Trailer park Vagina is a good band name. I'm the lead singer. All right. Bye, Corey. Yeah. Good to see you, sir. Have a great day to talk in my office. Oh, all right. They're off. She won. Yeah. Killed. Well, that was just easy. Yep. Thank goodness. What did you just say? Thank goodness. Get out. Get out. It's evidently a mic processor exploded. I thought he was gonna turn it off. When I leave, when I'm out of the room, he'll be in here. Watch. Just stay till Fitz show the guy. Just linger around. I'll become a malingerer. By the way, the simulation. I told you earlier this week that it was completely broken. When I found out the guy running for governor in New Jersey's name was Jack Schitterelli. I know. It moved. And then Bo ye poons doing weather. And we had all sorts of weird simulation problems. Now for sure. I know it's broken. Conor McGregor's running for president of Ireland. Oh. And I'm. He's. He's got good support. I was like, oh, this is silly. I just looked at a poll. He's. He's doing okay. Really. I figured maybe 2%. And then you realize, oh, God, they're Irish, they're stupid, and they love fighting. This is not gonna be good. Yeah. Because he said he'll stand face to face with any world leader. You know that's going to end in a punch, right? Or a headbutt. EB lines for North Korea. Oh, yeah. Gotta take care of NART Korea real quick. That mother owes us money. All right, let's get out of here. Corey, you got anything going this weekend? Yes. Rising tonight. And then we have NAU football Tomorrow, Phoenix Rising. Soccer tonight on the radio. Great night. Oh, man. And people say radio is not doing well. Well, forget it. What kind of numbers you pulling over there? Two, three people? A decent amount. Yeah, that would be surprising if you got to three. I might listen to that if you want them. Who calls the game? Is there a theme night that's two of there on? I think. No. Next time is Latino Heritage Night is next time. I forget what tonight is. It's every night. It's soccer. It's soccer. I believe them. I mean, why bother? They should have Anglo Heritage Night. That would be a special evening. But if you go, you get $1 beers. Does everybody get a pair of umbros and, like, a boyfriend when they leave? Thank you. No, no, not this game. They get a KDKB sticker and an umbrel. Do you simulcast on kdkb? No. You should have four listeners. Well, yeah, we'd still, you know, but they'd all be targeting the audience. Gotta hit soccer, football. Tonight. We. You're. Do you think anybody's gonna listen to a rising game? Sure. Yeah. You're insane. I mean, if you like sports. Yeah. Well, maybe the Raiders aren't playing tonight. So, I mean. That's right. Chargers and, you know. Yeah. I don't know. Soccer on the Radio. Soccer on the radio is a good band name. And we're all good. Just want to give this guy a shout out. Jim Manley, once again, the nicest man in the world. Doing this just because of us. And I think that's nice. He's. He's climbed on to what. What I love as a charity. Lost Her Home Pet Rescue. And he's doing a charity show at Cactus Jacks. Tonight or tomorrow. I'm sorry. Tomorrow at 6. Go over there and just hang out and have fun. Have beers and help out the nicest man in the world who's doing this just because he is. And lost her home. Pet Rescue wins in the end, which is never a bad thing. I'm probably gonna pop over there, check it out. Six o'. Clock. Be down there. Thriller. Come on. Oh, I've got a rising game oh, that's tomorrow. Tomorrow? No, no, tomorrow's NAU Football. Lumberjacks. Tomorrow. Choices. Okay. Well, I'm definitely. I'll put it on in the car on my way home. You should. It's fun. There's a cliff close to Cactus Jacks. Is there anywhere I could drive off? Like, South Mountain's close enough. I'll just hop up there. That's it. We're done. Larry's next. You guys have a great day. We'll see you Monday. So long. It's not weird. It's pretty cool actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this. All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. The Desert Ridge Improv features Gianmarco Cerese Thursday through Saturday, east side of the Tempe Improv. Catch the multi talented Rosebud Baker on Friday and Saturday at Downtown at Standup Live. Check out three great comedians with Nick Guerra Thursday, Dan Soder Friday and Saturday at Elizabeth Bruno on Sunday. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com this is Larry McFeely and it's Prime Toyota time with cooler mornings, those desert sunsets and weekends floating down the Salt river with your friends when you need a truck that can haul tubes, coolers and still look sharp after the all new 2025 Toyota Tacoma is built for Arizona Life that I force. Max hybrid engine is perfect for pulling gear up canyon roads with 465 foot pounds of torque. When September calls for the Salt River, a mountain getaway or just cruising around the Valley, the Tacoma's ready to roll. Visit your Valley Toyota Dealer or valleytoyotadealers.com Toyota Let's Go Places. Yes, Mr. Gecko, you're a huge inspiration to us all. But who was your muse? Oh my dear old Nan. She imparted many wise words to me. She would say, never let the fame get to your head. Always remember who you are and let people get more than just savings. With Geico's fast and friendly claim support, I lived up to her advice and now anyone can file a claim anywhere and anytime. I miss her so much. Did she go somewhere? Extended quilting trip. Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico.