09-08-25 - BR - MON - World Record For Most People On A Flight Is Over A Thousand - What Your Drink Order Says About You - Uber Is Testing Cash Payments

Summary

Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – September 8, 2025 Episode Summary

Overview

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness on 98KUPD finds John Holmberg and co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo in classic irreverent form, riffing on everything from personal stories (Brady’s cancer and kidney transplant), weird news (world record flights, a botched Target sweatpants design), pop culture, drinking habits, and bizarre viral videos. The banter is quick, snarky, and relentless, mixing dark humor with genuine moments of camaraderie.

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Main Discussion Points and Insights

1. Buying Meat in Bulk and Mattress Connections (01:34–06:04)

• John shares a personal story about a mattress store owner who also offers him half a cow’s worth of beef, prompting a discussion about buying meat in bulk.
  • John: “Buy a mattress, I’ll give you some of my freezer.” (02:08)
  • Brady says he's only bought half a pig, not a cow, and knows friends who do the cow purchase yearly.
• The crew debates the logistics and appeal of storing so much meat, and John admits to eating raw ground beef straight from the wrapper: “I just started to funnel it out of that tube into my mouth like it was cake icing.” (04:06)

2. Brady’s Kidney Cancer & Workplace Sympathy (07:04–11:25)

• John highlights that Brady recently had kidney cancer removed and muses on the lack of support from their workplace compared to what might occur at more sentimental stations.
  • John: “You needed a little bit more sympathy, like hugs and sit downs and we love yous.” (09:48)
  • Brady admits he doesn’t quite feel like a “cancer survivor,” as he didn’t have to undergo chemo or a long fight.
• The gang jokes about how men handle health crises differently than other radio shows: “We grabbed Brady by the legs and we smashed him into a wall and joked about it and had fun.” (08:33)

3. Notable “Brady Report” Trivia and News (12:53–27:16)

World Records & Consumer Trends

• The ampersand is celebrated for National Ampersand Day (13:04–13:41).
• Male gamers preferring to play as female characters, with some Black Mirror references about in-game identity (13:55–14:41).
• The world record for most people on a commercial flight: 1,088, during an Ethiopian Jewish evacuation by El Al Airlines (16:00–16:24).
  • “Calcutta? To where?” “Yeah. El Al Airlines…They fit that many people in there?” “Removed all the seats, just standing.” (16:12–16:24)

What Your Drink Order Says About You (17:31–19:31)

• The crew discusses, with sarcastic input, a list about drink orders defining personality:
  • Water: “Waiters will assume you’re either focused on hydration or wanting to save money. You’re cheap.” (17:45)
  • Cosmopolitan: “You’re extra fancy, possibly a huge Sex in the City fan.” (18:05)
  • Tito’s and vodka: “If anybody orders Tito’s and vodka, the bartender goes, what do you mean soda?” (19:12)
  • Yoohoo at a restaurant: “Probably at a fourth grade level, you’re 12.” (19:31)

Odd Trends and News

• Uber is testing cash payments in certain cities to expand access, which the hosts mock as a step backwards due to concerns over driver safety and the audience targeted:
  • John: “What kind of company is catering to the people with no bank accounts crowd? Like why in the world…” (22:03)

Viral News and Fashion Fails

• Target’s women’s Champion sweatpants face backlash for an unfortunate center pleat, which the gang describes in graphic, comedic detail:
  • John: “There's a pleat right in the front. It’s a... Gynecologists don’t open you up that much. What is this…” (24:58)

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Memorable Quotes & Moments

• “I just started to funnel it out of that tube into my mouth like it was cake icing.” – John Holmberg (04:06)
• “We grabbed Brady by the legs and we smashed him into a wall and joked about it and had fun with it instead of making it some sad…” – John Holmberg (08:33)
• “What kind of company is catering to the people with no bank accounts crowd?” – John Holmberg, on Uber’s cash policy (22:03)
• On the Target sweatpants flaw: “It looks like a change pouch in the middle. It’s disgusting. You don’t put a cut there—especially one that thick.” – John Holmberg (25:31)

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Viral Videos & Sports Fights (25:52–28:34)

• Highlights include:
  • Stadium brawl among San Francisco 49ers fans that escalates when a woman starts swinging (26:11–26:47).
  • A bull attack in a front yard caught on video, which the crew reacts to with gruesome fascination (27:16–27:40).
• John, a sports fan, gleefully details his schadenfreude at rivals’ losses that weekend, referencing the Steelers and Dodgers with metaphorical flair:
  • “It was Bellagio. It was gorgeous. People came over like Peter North out there… One of those wedding fondue things, just dipping marshmallows in it.” (27:49)

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Bizarre Viral Video Reactions (30:07–33:17)

• This segment includes:
  • A convenience store incident: A man drops his pants, is swiftly knocked out by another customer, who then shops casually. (30:13–30:35)
  • Public transit lunacy: An attractive couple goes at it on a bus, which the hosts joke must have been staged for video (31:22–31:59).
  • An “OnlyFans-worthy” scene of a large woman in hospice care providing entertainment in a truly odd and grotesque way; the hosts react in horror and disbelief (32:07–32:38).

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Final Thoughts & Tone

The episode is a quintessential slice of irreverent, Arizona morning radio: wild news tidbits, mockery of modern trends, shock-value viral video commentary, and the hosts’ relentless teasing of each other. The mood is quick-witted, sarcastic, sometimes dark, but underpinned by genuine camaraderie.

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Notable Timestamps

• 01:34 – Mattress/meat discussion and eating raw ground beef
• 07:04 – Brady’s kidney cancer and workplace banter
• 13:04 – Ampersand discussion for “National Ampersand Day”
• 16:00 – World record for people on a flight (Evacuation flight story)
• 17:31 – What your drink order says about you (comedic breakdown)
• 22:23 – Uber testing cash payments (intense mockery)
• 24:53 – Target’s sweatpants design fail
• 25:52 – Viral NFL stadium fight video commentary
• 27:16 – Bull attack video
• 30:13 – Convenience store KO video
• 31:22 – Bus sex video and related commentary

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Takeaway for New Listeners

If you haven't listened to Holmberg’s Morning Sickness, this episode typifies their blend of topical irreverence, personal story-sharing, and crude (but funny) reactions to the world’s oddest news and viral sensations—all delivered in rapid-fire, bantering Arizona radio style.

Transcript

[Host]

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[Mo]

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[Brady]

Inspiration to us all. But who was your muse? My dear old nan, she would tell me, always remember to be true to yourself and to use that fast and.

[John Holmberg]

Friendly claim support on the Geico app. I follow her advice to this day. Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico Morning sickness I'm getting you guys asking me about the mattresses? Because I went over to that Verlo place, talked to Jonathan over there and then other people emailing me about what? About that side of beef you were talking about. He's. Jonathan gave me. He delivered a. He should include that. He delivered the mattresses to the rental and he goes, hey, I just wanted to give you the he gave me some. He buys a half a cow, like from some farm. I don't know. He's related to the guy. He's been in the city forever. He's native, so he's not native American, but native to the city, which I guess makes him native in his own way. He brought me this ground beef and I'm thinking about getting half a cow with him because that was the best. He should just give you beef every time you get a mattress. Jonathan, you should think about that. Buy a mattress, I'll give you some of my freezer.

[Host]

Sounds like a car dealership.

[John Holmberg]

You'll be blown away. You'll sleep like a baby with a belly full of Alice Cooper guitar. Don't do that. People. You want people to actually show up. It was delicious. So, yeah, anybody who's got. Have you ever done that ever? Brady, you're the one I should ask. Have you ever bought a half a cow before? You would do that back before?

[Brady]

Not a cow, a pig.

[John Holmberg]

You bought a whole pig or half a pig half and just kept it in the freezer?

[Brady]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Not allowed to do that anymore. You're done with that?

[Brady]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

But it was worth it. Just half a cow thing seems reasonable. I have to buy a freezer for it, but I can't put it in the house.

[Brady]

And I. And I know I have a couple of friends that do that every year on the cow thing.

[John Holmberg]

Man, this stuff, I swear by. Oh, I.

[Host]

What's it go for? I don't know. Oh, okay.

[John Holmberg]

Jonathan's.

[Brady]

I will tell you this, you know, if you hear from the person, the person that buys it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Make sure it's good. The processing of it, the butchering and the.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no, no, trust me. He gave me some cuz.

[Brady]

Cuz a couple people have gotten it before and it was. Oh, I got a great deal on it. But the.

[John Holmberg]

There's like a snout in it. Hair. Yeah, this is perfect. He brought me some ground beef and it comes in one of those.

[Brady]

Like, don't skimp on that.

[John Holmberg]

It's like that tube and I opened up the top and I start to squeeze it out and it's. It's good for like three or four patties. I just started to make one and I can't handle raw ground beef. I eat it, I don't cook it. It feels good in my hands and I love the smell of raw meat. So I just started to funnel it out of that tube into my mouth like it was cake icing. Yeah, cake icing. Or those frost. Yeah, like I just put that meat in my mouth and I squeezed. No, but it was those little freezy pops. I was squeezing and I realized what I was doing was like disgusting. I ate a pound of ground beef right out of the package and it was amazing. So then I flash fried the other two just because I don't like. I like raw meat. And I hit it on the grill. It's the. It is literally the best meat I've ever had. And it's from the mattress guy.

[Co-host]

Not cheap, but it'll last you.

[Brady]

It's a couple grand.

[John Holmberg]

Is it two grand for half a cow? We were going to go 5050 on half a cow. And then I told Stebbings about it. My buddy Mark's like, I'm in on that. And he just turned to his wife and he goes, you want to buy half a cow? Why do you gotta ask her? Just bring home a half a cow. She should be thrilled. It's. But again, two people, Brady and Brett were asking about the mattresses. Yeah. I'm telling you, also ask Jonathan over there about the meat. They don't sell that at Furlough Mattresses. But he's a. He's good at it, and he knows where to get it.

[Co-host]

Is there a special on one or the other?

[Brady]

If you.

[John Holmberg]

The meat? Yeah.

[Co-host]

Well, if you buy a mattress, do you get a special on the meat? And if you buy the meat, do you get a special on the mattress?

[John Holmberg]

Because laying on all the mattresses were just sl. He's over in Glendale. I'm telling you, man. My tuft and needle deal dried up because they got bought out by Sealy. So then they just became. Which is fine, but I Getting close to needing a new one because it's been a long time. And then I started to get these for the rental property, and they are awesome. Look into it. And if you're in the area, go to the store because they've got all the beds laid out. And get one of those side sleeper pillows. You can't. Anyway, I'm done with that.

[Host]

I need to get one of those.

[John Holmberg]

Grab some meat. Oh, it's the best. Got that cut out in the center. You just jam your shoulder onto it, and it's good. Oh, my. Oh, yeah. Because you don't. Yeah. You don't have to, like jam. It's.

[Brady]

I don't need it. I want it.

[John Holmberg]

You don't need it. You can't sleep on your side. You sleep on your back.

[Co-host]

Kink that hose.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You'll suffocate. You sleep on your side.

[Brady]

Yeah, I started this. Not the last two weeks. Didn't have that.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. You're on your back right now. Yeah, I know. You're a side sleeper. You look like a guy.

[Brady]

Did a little. Try a little side Thing not ready. Almost there.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. A little more stomach muscle inside sleeping than you think. You got to tighten up.

[Brady]

You feel like tincture. You feel like you just got a open bag of innards just rolling around.

[John Holmberg]

That's disgusting. Don't say that. No, you don't.

[Brady]

I've never felt that way, but okay.

[John Holmberg]

You know how did he say n words?

[Host]

No, I would have been laughing.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You know how. You know you're a little out of shape, as if you disguise your. Your stomach is described as it goes through your mind.

[Brady]

You're wondering how loose is stuff.

[John Holmberg]

It's not strapped down anymore. You lost a couple anchors in there. Well, you look good. Feeling good?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

All right. We're two weeks away. Tomorrow's two weeks from when you got your kidney ripped. Feeling good. Brady brought this up. I'll talk about it. Brady's a cancer survivor. Like, that's cancer.

[Co-host]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

You had cancer in that kidney. Right. And you struggle with that phrase.

[Brady]

It doesn't feel that way because you.

[John Holmberg]

Didn'T go through anything.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You had it like you feel.

[Brady]

Yeah. I don't put myself in the category of people that went through hell recovery.

[Co-host]

But you're right, though.

[John Holmberg]

You're.

[Co-host]

They excised it before it got to you.

[John Holmberg]

And you know, this. This. This building here. Not one email. Not one like, hey, Brady's in there. Let's all root for Brady or if you want to contact him or whatever. I know if chat GPT or is Walt did something like that, they'd have like parties and like.

[Co-host]

I don't want to rub salt, but I got a nice card from them for my mom.

[John Holmberg]

Did you really?

[Brady]

I got a card last.

[Co-host]

Oh, you did?

[John Holmberg]

From who?

[Brady]

Monday from Emily and the sales staff. And I heard. So It's Emily from the station.

[Co-host]

From Emily. Emily threw it at people.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. The higher up should have known about this. Should have gotten a call from the owner. Should have gotten a call from the owner. I'll say it. You can be nice about it. I don't have to be. Cuz I know if the. The. The Ks Electro had something going on. First off, they had like candleite vigils for each other the whole morning.

[Co-host]

Be selling hot dogs out there.

[John Holmberg]

I've been doing some sort of fundraising.

[Host]

Old hot dogs.

[Brady]

We.

[John Holmberg]

You know why? Yeah, they were do.

[Host]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You know why we don't get that kind of love is because we treat things like men. Brady went at this like, I got cancer and my kidney's gotta come out and I might not make it. And I got A whole bunch of stuff. I need a transplant, blah, blah, blah. And we took it and we grabbed Brady by the legs and we smashed him into a wall and joked about it and had fun with it instead of making it some sad. You know what? To remember Smiley and Sims at the Zone, the new guys. Imagine how they had a whole week's shows of crying. Cause Smiley broke up with his girlfriend. Anything happened to them, A little bit adversarial. And it was a whole week's worth of sobbing and bosses calling.

[Brady]

They were ahead of the curve.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they were ahead of the curve when it came to being women on the air. I just lost my. This was an exact phrase a grown man used on the radio in 2000. I'm having a rough go.

[Brady]

What is it, Dave?

[John Holmberg]

That's my Greg Sims impression. I lost my. My sweetie baby pumpkin pie last night, and he started to cry because his girlfriend left him the night before. Brady comes in with a ball of death inside his kidney. Gonna get my kidney removed. Need a transplant. Not changing my diet. Not doing anything about it. And this company's like, just let him go. He'll be all right. I'm not telling the bosses about this. Brady needs a trip. Was good. Tripp checked in. He was nice. The owners of this place needed it. You needed a. You need a little bit more sympathy, like hugs and sit downs and we love yous and stuff. Like, I was handing out. I was handing him out like crazy. Also trying to keep an eye on his diet.

[Brady]

Listeners were amazing.

[John Holmberg]

Listeners were awesome. Yeah.

[Co-host]

I don't know what that feels like.

[John Holmberg]

Should have been an email welcoming you back. And you, too. Like, yeah, Toledo had that. Yeah. Listeners don't like, you care that you. That's just my personal opinion. If I get cancer and then I come out of it smelling like a rose, like, Brady is over there and he's still got work to do. I'm calling the owner. I'm like to hear about my cancer.

[Co-host]

Shaking his head when you said he's.

[John Holmberg]

Got work to do. He does.

[Brady]

He knows not only work, but, you know, you say the cancer. Who knows what happens?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You don't know if there's more.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

That and the fact you're facing this whole transplant situation, the fact that it is cancerous. Someone has to die for you to live. And here we do. Selling that show every day. Yeah. That's a fact. Brady's watching the news for rollover car wrecks.

[Co-host]

Are we gonna have the family in when? Oh, yeah, when he gets that.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's gonna Be a SOB festival. No, that's what other shows would do. We're gonna dodge those people like the plague. They can't come in here. That's just creepy. Taking advantage of. Yeah, you should go. Hey. Hey, owners. You hear about my cancer? Yes, we did, Brady. Thanks for the card.

[Co-host]

What about als, Matt?

[John Holmberg]

Als, Matt got more support. Sorry, I'm on a tirade for break. I think that the crew up north should send down some flowers at the very least. Or some of those Christmas turtles they got laying around. Those are cute. You can't have any anymore, but I'll eat them in your stead. Oh, my God. It's 8 11. Hurry up, Brady. It's time for the Brady Report. All Brady's dying talk has got us.

[Host]

Way to go, Brady.

[John Holmberg]

Wait. Brady's late.

[Brady]

Sorry.

[John Holmberg]

It's time for the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our friends at AllProchade. AllProchade.com that is where you get your shade taken care of. Oh, boy. Last night I had that big umbrella in the backyard. I was so happy with it. Created all that shade. And at the end of the night, what did I have to do? Go outside and hump that thing back to normal? Place it in its spot manually? Brady's got it figured out there, too. Less work. You put the umbrella up, it puts itself back. That's awesome. You have timers on yours? No. You can get them. You can? Yeah, sure. You can say, I want these out there till like six at night. Then we're going to be inside. Oh, it's perfect. All pro shades got you covered in a world of comfort and shade. Now that it's like 99 degrees outside, you can dump it down 15 degrees and have perfect weather in your yard. Thanks to your [e-mail]. get it done. Today, you p. D. Holmberg's Morning sickness. Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix.

[John Holmberg]

Hello, world. Howdy.

[Brady]

Happy National Ampersand Day.

[John Holmberg]

The ampersand made a strong comeback in the last few years. The AT symbol and the ampersand have been.

[Brady]

Has been used since the 1st century AD flat.

[John Holmberg]

What's the first thing you think of with an ampersand in it? Usually it's a company.

[Co-host]

Like right now. I think of Penn and Teller.

[John Holmberg]

Penn and Teller, they use it? Yeah, Mine is Laverne and Shirley. I always think of their little the ampersand. Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

When you said it right away, it's not even in there. But I don't think so. Buck and Rider.

[John Holmberg]

But nope, you're just hungry.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You just want some?

[Brady]

I miss food.

[John Holmberg]

You could actually eat that.

[Brady]

Some of it, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Fish. Yeah. You're good at that.

[Brady]

I'm proud of Baseless fun.

[John Holmberg]

I'm proud of you. You've been doing good. As far as I know. You're putting on a good show. At least.

[Brady]

29% of male gamers prefer playing as female characters, particularly older male players. Overall, 48% of the guys prefer playing as males. 2022% have no preference.

[John Holmberg]

Nobody in this room watch Black Mirror? No. There's an episode where two friends are it's future. So they're playing games online, but you have this chip and it sends you into the game and one of the dudes is playing as a girl and it's the other dude's best friend and they start making out in the game and you get all the feelings and sensations of what's happening in the game and then they realize, is this because we like each other so much or because our characters are hot? So they give gay a chance and realize it's wrong for them, but it ruins their lives.

[Brady]

On the other side of it, it says 9% of female players prefer playing as male characters. Overall, 76% of women prefer playing as females. 11% have no preference.

[John Holmberg]

I just got a text from your Dr. Brady. It says, good news, we have a donor, a kidney donor. And we can put it in right away. Hey, wait. Oh, a lady from Philadelphia just took it. Oh, that's terrible. Silly lady just stole Brady's kidney.

[Brady]

It takes 27,000 trees to make all the toilet paper the world goes through in one day. If you expand that out, it's 9.8 million trees per year for toilet paper. That's mind boggling.

[John Holmberg]

It's big paper. I've been talking about it for years. South park did their episode about it. We need to get rid of it. Everything needs to be bidets, showers, and soap. By the way, Scott Blamer just fired off of Mice and Men for his ampersand, which drastically makes me look stupid compared to him because he went Steinbeck literature and I went Lowell Gans and Babalu Mandel's classic Laverne and Shirley.

[Brady]

The world record for the most people on a commercial flight is 1088. The number also included two babies that were born on the flight. What?

[John Holmberg]

Calcutta? To where?

[Brady]

Yeah. El Al Airlines helped evacuate Ethiopian Jews in 1991 and flew them to Israel. They fit that many people in there?

[John Holmberg]

Sro. They removed all the seats, just standing.

[Brady]

Packed them in, and I have to.

[Co-host]

Buckle up Over Las Vegas.

[Brady]

Are you still taking that flight, right, to get out of there?

[John Holmberg]

Me?

[Brady]

Yeah. I mean, like, if you're in that thousand people on that flight, I think we can make it in spirit.

[Host]

No, I'm good.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I'm. I'm basically. Look, I'm an Ethiopian Jew in the 90s. I'm pretty sure I've hung myself already. That doesn't seem. I'm already Ethiopian, which means I'm starving. And I've also chosen being Jewish as my faith, and that's frowned upon over there. Last thing I'm gonna do is cram onto a plane. And they took him to Israel. Yeah, just dropped them off.

[Brady]

They had to jump.

[John Holmberg]

They all had to jump, even the babies. The newborn strap, little. All you need is like a bash's bag for that. Put it on his shoulders and throw them out his little parachute.

[Brady]

According to food and wine.

[John Holmberg]

I want to test that.

[Brady]

Here's what your go to drink order says about you.

[John Holmberg]

Basically, water, your go to drink, your go to group. Yeah, I got you.

[Brady]

If you order water, waiters will assume you're either focused on hydration or wanting to save money. You're cheap, but there's a range. If you order tap water, you're down to earth. Sparkling water says you're up for an adventure. Cosmopolitan.

[John Holmberg]

I'm with Brett.

[Brady]

If you order a Cosmo, this you're extra fancy. Possibly a huge Sex in the City fan, like Brett said.

[John Holmberg]

Brett was right. Right.

[Co-host]

Say about Midori sours.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no, don't do that to Larry. He doesn't need that right now.

[Brady]

Hot tea.

[John Holmberg]

What does it say about. Can we get all the drinks?

[Brady]

No, it just. It gave four or five. Hot tea says if you order hot tea, it says you're introspective, sincere, and you know how to take care of yourself.

[John Holmberg]

You're British.

[Brady]

Tito's and vodka.

[John Holmberg]

That's me. Tito's is vodka.

[Brady]

If you order Tito's and vodka.

[John Holmberg]

You bought Tito's is vodka.

[Brady]

I know. This is the point. They're saying people order Tito's and vodka.

[John Holmberg]

No, they don't.

[Co-host]

It's not Tito's and Vodka.

[Brady]

If you order Tito's and vodka, according.

[John Holmberg]

To this wine, it's a misprint.

[Brady]

Your bartender will make fun of you. Yeah, because it's already vodka.

[John Holmberg]

It's not an order. Yeah. If you say Tito's and vodka, you're near 19 and you're trying to get.

[Brady]

Your first ordering a double vodka, you're.

[Host]

Getting Tito's and then Kamchatka.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know what that is? Well, stuff is if anybody orders Tito's and vodka, the bartender goes, what do you mean soda?

[Brady]

What does Yoohoo say?

[John Holmberg]

I'm curious if you drink a lot of Yoohoo at a restaurant.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Spectrum One. Yeah.

[Brady]

Probably not at a restaurant.

[John Holmberg]

Read it. Well, fourth grade level, you're 12.

[Brady]

The term clock botching is trending. People who don't seem to agree with what it means though you got a writer in the UK coined it last month and said it was when you work more hours than you should because you can't get through all of your work. But a writer for Forbes defined it as when you're stretching small tasks into entire afternoons just to fill your day avoiding work. Here's something off your Averlo mattress deal.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

According to this report, 47% of Americans would pay more for a vacation that helps them sleep.

[John Holmberg]

They'd fly somewhere else to sleep, huh?

[Brady]

Yeah. They basically would look for places to go that would are you can have more sleep. Even if it's a camping trip where it's based upon getting rest and relaxation.

[John Holmberg]

The whole point of a vacation.

[Brady]

That'S. That's the point of it. Yeah, but you ask people most of the time on their vacation.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's why I don't like vacations. They're more stressful than just staying home.

[Brady]

If you're looking for a sleepy getaway, the report named Portland, Oregon the most.

[John Holmberg]

Well rested city because they're high all the time. The whole city smokes pot.

[Brady]

Madison, Wisconsin, St. Paul, Min. Minnesota scored well. Philadelphia ranked as the sleepiest city and not in a good way.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, because they never get any rest cuz they're always busy being jerks.

[Host]

Throwing batteries.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Thinking of horrible things to do to somebody.

[Brady]

Uber has started testing a new form of payment cash.

[John Holmberg]

What?

[Co-host]

That's bad.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Brady]

Uber says the idea is to expand access to people without bank accounts. No, but drivers are concerned because they.

[John Holmberg]

Get a lot of cash now they're robbed. That's stupid.

[Co-host]

There's gonna be those. So they're cash acceptors.

[John Holmberg]

There still doesn't get a machine full account still bad.

[Brady]

La, San Diego, Dallas and Orlando.

[Host]

All the places you shouldn't do that.

[Brady]

Well and so if it passes there.

[John Holmberg]

Here's the thing.

[Co-host]

Back to being a cab.

[John Holmberg]

What kind of company is catering to the people with no bank accounts crowd? Like why in the world is your company like you know who we need to really go after people with absolutely no money. Let's. Let's start spending marketing cash on that people with no bank accounts aren't taking Uber people.

[Host]

Uber is not driving to Compton anymore.

[John Holmberg]

So anytime soon, it's like, who doesn't have any? Like, if you don't have a bank account, where are you going?

[Host]

Which is. It's crazy because it's the opposite. Like, a lot of the venues now don't accept cash at all concerts and everything else. So, like, Uber's going the opposite.

[John Holmberg]

That's. Yeah. I don't understand catering to people who aren't using your company and because they don't have any money. It's not because you've made it hard. I would use Uber with all of this cash I have. You're just going to get robbed.

[Brady]

Got a Florida man that's in trouble. Roman Rawicki is his name. He's 50 years old. He was arrested this week on several charges. Attempted murder, false imprisonment, criminal mischief, battery, and discharging a firearm at a residential property. This woman walked up to his house, started walking up the driveway. Roman thought, I got an intruder. After firing 17 shots, none of them hit.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Brady]

He then grabbed the woman by the arm, pulled her in, held her down, called the police.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. 17 misses.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Morning sickness.

[Brady]

Medicate.

[John Holmberg]

K U. PD Holmberg's morning sickness. Wow. That is.

[Brady]

He thought it was a hooker.

[John Holmberg]

I've seen this. The spirit Halloween. Phillies Ma or Phillies Karen?

[Brady]

That'll be big.

[John Holmberg]

No, it won't, by the. But we'll have forgotten about her by October 31st. She has to do something else.

[Brady]

Not a bad callback, though.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's a funny. Somebody will do it, but it's. It'll be forgotten. You have to explain yourself. Not like that Charlie Chaplin costume. That guy.

[Host]

Is that what you're doing this year?

[John Holmberg]

No. Sharp neck is. Evidently. I got an email from my friend John Sharpneck's former co worker. John's a very funny guy, but in a real subtle way. And he liked Eminem so much. When Eminem was big, he made his co workers call him Shady for a while. And then, like, just out of the blue started to think so please stop calling me Shady. Don't do it like something happened or one of the employees, like not calling you that, man.

[Brady]

Target is facing some backlash. They're selling some women's champion sweatpants. And the design, There's a design flaw.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Brady]

According to some camel toe.

[John Holmberg]

What is it?

[Brady]

It's beyond that.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, sweet Jesus. There's a pleat right in the front. It's a. Gynecologists don't open you up that much. What is this.

[Brady]

Whoa.

[Host]

Oh, my God.

[John Holmberg]

That is a mistake in the sewing thing. It's meant to be a little vent, evidently, but it's right where the vagina.

[Co-host]

Mannequin or is that actually on a person right there?

[John Holmberg]

It looks a little hippie. It's on a human being, man.

[Brady]

Yeah, I just took those two photos. It is a person. It's not a mannequin. Now, I think if you're a little bit thinner, it might not expand as much. Pleat. That center pleat.

[John Holmberg]

I want to risk it.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Because if you sit down, it might open up. It looks like a change pouch in the middle. It's disgusting. You don't put a cut there, especially one that thick. I want to wear those, too, though. That would actually be hilarious as a guy. My vagina pants.

[Brady]

I've got two radio videos.

[John Holmberg]

All right.

[Brady]

First one's always good. Opening weekend of football.

[Co-host]

Yeah, this is an opening weekend. Two teams didn't play.

[Brady]

Oh, they didn't play.

[Co-host]

Okay. My team.

[Brady]

I haven't seen this posted Fight. I've seen a lot of them.

[John Holmberg]

Seahawks and Rams.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Or the Niners and Rams. Where are we? We're at Sofi Niners. The Niners are playing the Rams. We're dancing around the concourse. A couple dudes bow up. A girl comes up, takes a swing at a puka Nakua fan. And now the 49ers fans who love fighting just go after Now. Oh, now the guy's fighting the girl who won't stop swinging at him.

[Brady]

Drop the guy back there. They'll go back to him.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, there's a huge. The Rams are winning this.

[Brady]

That's the second time that guy.

[John Holmberg]

Now the girl goes to fight the dude that just knocked a guy out. He can't punch her. He'll go to jail. The other guy. Oh, that first punch is solid. That sounds good. A straight right.

[Brady]

This had to have been maybe preseason. Or it could have been.

[Co-host]

No, it's last year in.

[John Holmberg]

Last year last. It's just leaking out now. Girl hits the dirt.

[Co-host]

Hawks and Niners played.

[John Holmberg]

Man, those Niner fans have a good reputation of being classy fans. Every stadium in the country has fought the Niners off the Cardinals fans. That's their most contentious game. Those Niner fans are for as much success as they've had. They're mean.

[Brady]

It's another death by bowl.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, boy. Bull in a. Just in somebody's yard. It's just outside a house. Oh, it's just. Oh, it's got him by the heart. Oh, it's spinning him around by the heart.

[Brady]

Watch this.

[John Holmberg]

Finishing gourd is heart. And now he's got him on. Oh, the pick up and throw. Yeah, that guy's all done. Well, that's what you get for living in a country where bulls are in.

[Co-host]

Your front yard and your water is delivered by cube.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you got cubes of water in a truck.

[Brady]

It's the first time event. I don't think they'll be doing it.

[John Holmberg]

Is this an event or. No, I don't. Just an accident that happened with the neighborhood bull. By the way, in another perfect moment in sports this weekend, I mean, you had Lamar losing, which means I spent an hour ejaculating the way they lost dealers. It was. It was Bellagio. It was gorgeous. People came over like Peter north out there. People were in there like it was a. One of those wedding fondue things, just dipping marshmallows in it. And then, you know, steelers win. I had fun with that. And I don't know if you saw what happened to the Dodgers on Saturday. Eight and two thirds, no hit. Right. They're down to the last out in the ninth inning. This guy for the Orioles hits a home run.

[Co-host]

Jackson Holiday.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And then they put a couple boys on base and they win the game. Oh, yeah.

[Co-host]

They walked in two, eight and they.

[John Holmberg]

Walked the runs in. It was like, was there. If Brady's God was like, had a speech on Friday, it would be like. And I'm going to give John Holmberg the greatest sports weekend he's ever. You don't mind the Dodgers to eight and two thirds having to eat that?

[Host]

Tripp must have been losing his mind.

[John Holmberg]

I didn't bring it up to him yesterday at the Steelers thing because I didn't want to, but I was.

[Brady]

You knew better.

[John Holmberg]

No, I didn't. I just was thinking of other stuff.

[Brady]

You had to get past your session first.

[John Holmberg]

It was so perfect. Yeah. I couldn't start doing that, like, because he leaves at halftime. If the Steelers got trounced or something, then he would have had it. But I'm not going to lay into him. But now that the perfect weekend is over, and I'm sorry for ASU fans, but Dale Hellistrate couldn't be more right. When he's like, can't we have. We can't have nice things. ASU is not going to be good two years in a row. It just doesn't happen. All right, Bert, what do you got?

[Host]

All right, we got. We're a little light today.

[John Holmberg]

It's Monday, so. Yeah, Monday. It's an easy we're easing into the week, by the way. Alvina has chimed in with her ampersand memories of Mike and Molly and Will and Grace so far. Scott Blamer, who I'm not supposed to talk about, he just told me, don't bring my name up. My boss here is. Is the smartest one in the room. I wouldn't get rid of him if I was his boss. That kid's. He's a reader.

[Host]

We may have seen this one before. I can't remember, but.

[John Holmberg]

Check this shit out right here. No, sorry. There's a guy saying to check stuff out.

[Host]

I wouldn't use the video.

[John Holmberg]

He walks into a convenience store. Guy drops all of his clothes, spreads his butt.

[Host]

Don't use the volume.

[John Holmberg]

I'm not. And then.

[Brady]

Did he poop?

[Co-host]

I think he gets taken out.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, there's a guy coming in. This door behind him has got his pants off in the. Oh, a black guy just comes in and sucker punches him and knocks him out. And then goes. And then Lavelle Crawford just goes shopping. He just walked in.

[Brady]

Casual walk.

[John Holmberg]

You're my way. Bad move. Yeah. Lavelle just pops this dude with pants down in the. You know, the doorway of the. The place.

[Host]

I don't know what he's doing, if he's dropping a deuce or what.

[John Holmberg]

He's mad at somebody. And then he just. And then Lavelle comes.

[Co-host]

Guy in the green just didn't even care.

[John Holmberg]

Why you doing this? Move out of my way right now. Both ends it. I gotta get some Funyuns. He just strolls right through, not to do nothing. And then went right back to get his natty light and Funyuns Friday move. Nice job, Lavelle.

[Host]

Here's a little show on the bus for you.

[John Holmberg]

There's. Oh, geez, that's just a deformity. Oral sex on the people one row behind you on the bus. And her pants are all the way off. And the dude is just taking one. She's. She's mouth hugging him right there and up. Now they're doing it. Nobody is stopping this. The. The guy just filming away. This has to be. They're in good shape too. These are. This is an attractive couple. This must have been. Now they're just standing up, having sex.

[Brady]

Holding on to the bar.

[Co-host]

Nice.

[John Holmberg]

That was great.

[Host]

Nice moves, kid.

[John Holmberg]

Makes me want to take the bus once. But I know people on the bus don't look like that normally. That was a setup.

[Host]

And then we'll just end with this one.

[John Holmberg]

We're running a little bit more Big fat lady. Granny's dying.

[Host]

But you got to make that only fans money.

[John Holmberg]

This is too soon. Toledo shouldn't be watching this. There's a woman in a hospice bed and a 400 pound woman in a doggy position. Oh, good lord. Oh, she picked up one of her hangers and put it on her face. That thing's hanging down 2fe. Oh, quit it. Oh, it's like a sack of flour.

[Brady]

She loses balance. There's a dance.

[John Holmberg]

Oh my God.

[Host]

I wish that concrete would have already be.

[John Holmberg]

I wish the concrete would have blinded me this weekend. Good lord.

[Brady]

So I was thinking the video before that. John, your stat of just think. There's so many people doing that. That's not happening on the bus.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, no, because that was pre arranged. That's different. That's for porn. I mean, there's been attempts, sure, but.

[Brady]

There might be some attempts this morning.

[John Holmberg]

But I don't think on public transit. No.

[Co-host]

Well, there'd be some arrests.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there's. You don't want. There's no good looking people on the bus. More. More than just the sex. There's sex on buses, sure. What are there maybe 1100 buses in the whole city? So it's not even a.

[Brady]

There's only so many good trains.

[John Holmberg]

Joel, you say that like it's 4.5 million people taking the bus. We're down to like the last 50,000. And now Uber wants those people to pay them in cash so they can have sex in the Uber for $43.

[Brady]

It's not happening right now. On their way to sky harbor now.

[John Holmberg]

The Sky Train is sex free since. Since 2009 remains. Got a little sign in there like tornadoes. Zero acts of sex on our train since 2009. That was a good one, though. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady Report. It's 98K UPD.

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