09-08-25 - Comments On John's DIY Poles - John Rants Against YoutubeTV Offering WNBA Games For His Quadbox - Lamar Jackson Says Mick Vick Is His QB Inspiration - HR Ball Karen At Marlins/Phillies Game Steals Ball From Dad And Son

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 09-08-25 (September 8, 2025): Comments On John's DIY Poles, YouTube TV's WNBA Quadbox, Lamar Jackson’s Michael Vick Admiration, and HR Ball 'Karen' at Marlins/Phillies Game
Podcast Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Station: 98KUPD | Hubbard Radio

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Episode Overview

This episode delivers Holmberg-style takes on a wide range of topics: John’s DIY backyard project and the avalanche of listener commentary it provoked; John’s signature rant regarding YouTube TV’s unwanted WNBA inclusion in his NFL quadbox setup; discussion of Lamar Jackson’s controversial claim that Michael Vick is his QB idol; and an in-depth, comedic breakdown of the viral “HR Ball Karen” controversy at the Marlins/Phillies game, featuring the infamous baseball-snatching incident. The hosts—irreverent, unfiltered, and quick-witted—focus their lens on absurdities in sports, media, and everyday life, all with trademark Arizona flavor.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. John's DIY Home Project & Listener Feedback

[02:15–07:20]

• John brings up his weekend DIY project, referencing photos he plans to post online showing off his work and emphasizing the presence (or absence) of safety equipment.
• Listener emails flood in, congratulating and ribbing him. Alexander Herrera (via email) credits John but immediately admonishes him:

  “But for God’s sakes, where’s your goggles? Safety first, jackass. Can’t have America’s sweetheart going blind.” — Alexander Herrera, as read by John [03:18]

• The conversation details generational differences on safety:
  • John jokes that older generations "just get it done," and safety gear is more for those not in the know.
  • Anecdotes from listeners suggest gloves are more common (“We call those pussy mittens where I work”), and John riffs on the subject and listener ethnicities.
• Brett suggests John do a reality show:

  “John, it’s time you quit this radio garbage and start your own construction on the spectrum channel.” [05:28]

• John spins ideas for shows where amateurs attempt complicated builds with no instructions, in a “Internet Builder”-style concept.

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2. Banter On Workplace Insubordination (Inspired by British Court Ruling)

[07:20–12:00]

• John brings up a European court case where calling your boss a “dickhead” was ruled not to be grounds for firing, predicting, “That’s gonna leak over the pond and come over here soon.” [07:34]
• He encourages (tongue-in-cheek) listeners to test the limits at their own workplaces—except not with his own boss, Tripp:

  “I’m not gonna call Tripp a dickhead. That’s crazy talk. He calls me that all the time!” [09:20]

• The segment’s tone is sarcastic but pointed, dissecting double-standards and the performative nature of modern HR.

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3. The Ethics and Absurdity of the NFL Sunday TV Setup

John’s YouTube TV MultiView Rant
[12:04–18:49]

• John rails against YouTube TV’s multiview feature populating his coveted “quadbox” with WNBA games amid football overload, given the price he pays for NFL access.

  "If algorithms are really a thing and you know what I like based on what I watch, then don't put the motherf***ing WNBA in my multi views." [14:32]

• Mocks how little the WNBA means to fans during NFL time:

  "Anybody interested in the WNBA is not keeping their eye on it with football. They're watching that and maybe like Melissa Etheridge on a loop." [14:49]

• Laments the exorbitant cost of modern a la carte streaming (“My bill came to YouTube TV was like $400…” [13:18]) and how TV packages have ballooned compared to promises of cheaper, customizable experiences.

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4. Technology, Advertising, and the Dangers of AI “Learning” the Wrong Things

[16:36–17:31]

• John details creepy targeting—how Apple TV & YouTube ads are hyper-specific, cross-device, and not always wanted.
• Anecdotes about mattress ads, lubricants, and “goggles” illustrate the uncanny accuracy … except when it comes to sports viewing preferences (i.e., still can’t shake the WNBA from his football screen).

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5. Lamar Jackson, Michael Vick, and Ethical Role Models in Sports

[18:58–26:45]

• Hosts dissect a pregame interview where Lamar Jackson called Michael Vick his NFL idol.

  "Isn't it sort of the same as a running back saying, 'I just love O.J. Simpson?' ... Shouldn't that be frowned upon? The dude did horrible stuff." — John [19:00]

• John condemns sports’ tendency to “turn a blind eye” to athletes’ heinous pasts, giving a detailed, graphic recounting of Vick's dogfighting abuses:

  "Michael Vick used to take dogs that were suffering and pick them up by the legs and smash them into the ground until they were dead..." [24:36]

• He challenges the logic of still holding up Vick (and similar figures) as role models, questioning the NFL’s priorities and the memory of fans.

  "Nobody should ever aspire to like that. He ruined the privilege of being mentioned as a great." [26:22]

• The group briefly discusses race, redemption, and who gets to be “forgiven”—alongside gallows humor and raw assessment.

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6. Viral Baseball ‘Karen’ at Marlins/Phillies Game

[28:26–39:40]

• The crew dives into the instantly viral moment where a woman (dubbed “Home Run Ball Karen,” a.k.a. "the Lesbian," with extended riffs about her hair) aggressively snatches a home run ball from a young boy at a Marlins game.
• Colorful hair and personality analysis:

  “She is a human Subaru Outback. Look at her. … She just jumped out of a 1988 yearbook.” — John [29:46]

• Brett summarizes the dad’s dignified reaction:

  “I hope that ball means a lot to her.” [31:33]

• The hosts deconstruct ballpark etiquette, escalate the joke, and debate whether the father’s example was better serving as conflict de-escalation or needlessly passive.

  “Well, in my opinion, he taught a lesson to his son to not stand up for himself. … At that moment, you bark at that lesbian.” — John [35:49]

• The woman’s look (“Cruella De Vil hair”) spawns a running riff about “fun hair” signifying latent insanity; multiple jabs at middle-aged women with two-tone or shaved undercuts ensue.
• They acknowledge the consequences:
  • Rumors the woman lost her job; the recipient family is showered with gifts, including an RV, for their ordeal.
• On viral justice:

  “That’s the one good and bad thing about all this. Cameras everywhere, you out the horrible people and then sometimes you feel really bad for some folks who did something dumb.” — John [40:15]

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7. Other Notable Sports & Stadium Etiquette Moments

[40:28–44:50]

• The show details other incidents of adults snatching memorabilia from kids at events—referencing the U.S. Open hat theft by a CEO and the violence of old-school crowd giveaways (including a “mountain of a woman” at a Coyotes game who barreled through rows for a coupon).
• They muse on how public shaming is a double-edged sword and mock CEO-types as always being the bad guy in these viral tales.

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8. Final Riffs: Haircuts, Gender Stereotypes, and DIY Anthems

[45:12–52:59]

• The “fun hair” concept is dissected further—now comparing it to men’s “flat tops” as an instant insanity signal.

  "Fun is a swing or a slide. It’s never your hair. Ever. Don’t ever cut it. You look like a Fraggle or a Beatle…" — John [47:02]

• John relishes posting photos of his DIY yard project, daring listeners to criticize.
• Quick exploration of “Handyman” (the Del Shannon and James Taylor versions) as a possible new Holmberg theme song.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On DIY Safety:

  “Goggles are for people who don’t know what they’re doing or don’t have swimming pools at the ready to counteract whatever…” — John [04:22]

• On Streaming Overload:

  “My bill came to YouTube TV, was like $400… John McCain was wrong. A la carte TV is costing us thousands more.” — John [13:18]

• On Algorithm Failures:

  “Nobody wants the WNBA in the multi view… as much as I’m paying for TV, and you know what it does learn? Goddamn commercials.” — John [15:36]

• On Michael Vick’s NFL Legacy:

  “He ruined the privilege of being mentioned as a great. … O.J.—we don’t talk about O.J. … Let’s do the same for Michael.” — John [26:46]

• On Viral Ballpark Incidents:

  “She is a human Subaru Outback. Look at her … It’s more a bob, but it’s also a—It’s like a bi level. It looks like she just jumped out of a 1988 yearbook.” — John [29:46] “I hope the dad turned to his son and say, and that is why we hate lesbians. … Yeah, she’s out of her mind.” — John [32:47]

• On ‘Fun Hair’ as a Personality Warning:

  “Certain haircuts immediately make you crazy. So even if you do something a little bit off, it amplifies it by like a thousand.” — John [46:13]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

| Timestamp | Topic | |---------------|-------------------------------------------| | 02:15 | John’s DIY project & listener emails | | 07:21 | UK “dickhead at work” legal ruling | | 12:04 | John’s rant against YouTube TV (WNBA) | | 18:58 | Lamar Jackson/Michael Vick role model | | 28:26 | HR Ball Karen at Marlins/Phillies game | | 40:30 | Stadium etiquette and viral shaming | | 45:12 | Fun hair and gendered haircuts | | 52:22 | “Handyman” song talk, wrap-up riffs |

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Summary Tone & Language

The episode is quintessentially raw, sarcastic, and observational—delivering rants, punchlines, and insightful side-jabs that blend pop culture, sports, and blue-collar wisdom in equal measure. The hosts’ chemistry fuels the show’s rapid pace and irreverent edge, always keeping listener engagement in their crosshairs, and never shying from controversy or candid personal perspective.

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For new listeners:
This summary gives you a full rundown of the episode’s comedic highlights, controversial takes, and conversational ebb and flow—no ad breaks, no fluff, just the opinions, stories, and gut laughs you come for.

Transcript

[Podcast Host]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition, and accessories.

[Mo]

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[John]

Yes, Mr. Gekko, you're a huge inspiration to us all.

[Mo]

But who was your muse?

[John]

Oh, my dear old nan. She imparted many wise words to me. She would say, never let the fame get to your head. Always remember who you are and let people get more than just savings. With Geico's fast and friendly claim support, I lived up to her advice, and now anyone can file a claim anywhere and anytime. I miss her so much. Did she go somewhere?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John]

Extended quilting trip. Get more than just savings. Get more with Geico. All next morning sickness. Morning sickness radiate. K u p D. That's how I roll. There you go. Thank you, Miles. Oh, Jesus Christ.

[Podcast Host]

What are you doing over here?

[John]

It's like I should. I should punch this thing. Somebody will fix it. Good God, he's had a rave. Yeah. Suddenly we're at Abercrombie and Fitch trying to buy jeans. Music so loud you can't Hear each other. Anyway, it is 652. A lot of people following up on what I did. A guy named Alexander Herrera. These are the people the most serious about my kids. My self DIY construction project. That went perfectly. I will put the picture of what I did up on Facebook. And you will notice my tools are in the picture. And they are. I don't know if the wrench is in that picture. It's in the grass. Lowe's bucket. Geez. I don't think anything else is in that photo. That's all you need. My hands. They're not in the photo. Great.

[Brett]

You got to get some goggles.

[John]

Well, I don't listen to you for future projects. Look, cracker. I'll take it from the experts here in the emails with the vowels in their last name. This is from Alexander Herrera. I say just tip my hat to you, John, for doing the work in your backyard yourself. But for God's sakes, where's your goggles? Safety first, jackass. Can't have America's sweetheart going blind. We almost lost Brady McGinna. Have you going blind? Where's the just fix it mentality you used to live by? I used to scream that at just fix it. Sometimes I get a little bit of a wild hair. I try to do things myself and it usually ends badly this time. Just one trip to the er. This.

[Brett]

Would you do it again?

[John]

Yes. And I guarantee you it would be an absolute show of hilarity. Like I so expected to step away from what I thought I'd done and laugh like, this is terrible. Perfect. This one says, did you use your nose to mix the concrete? Gabriel Roa again. There he's back again. Just better. He didn't get the job. This guy says, my dad retired from doing concrete. Ramon Lopez Ramos Lopez. My dad retired from doing concrete. Retired. Deported. Yeah. 40 years. Never once did he think about using eye protection. Gloves. Yes. Yes. Safety glasses. No. Reylo. Yeah, that last guy told me goggles. Goggles are for people who don't know what they're doing or don't have swimming pools at the ready to counteract whatever a case. He says construction is a. This is the phrase we used to say. My grandpa taught me. It's good enough for who it's for. Cause it's not for us. So you just get it done to where the people who you're building it for think it's good. Another one. Gloves. We call those pussy mittens where I work. Yeah, Pussy mittens, a good band name. This guy says Jooberg man. Of many talents. Shock jock, Mason, Doctor, scientist, Jew. You guys are just jerks. It's not a job to be Jewish. It's hard work.

[Podcast Host]

Gene Simmons would disagree.

[John]

No, it's not a job. It's an obligation. This one's from Ryan Weber. John, it's time you quit this radio garbage and start your own construction on the spectrum channel. I think that's not a bad idea. You know, they have those shows like Cake Boss, and people like structure on the spectrum. Just dudes who don't know what they're doing show you don't masterpiece. And then to use the. You know what would be a great show? Internet builder. You know, AI Builder. And it's like a dude like me and Brett, and we breach into a bucket, and there's a project, and we got to figure it out, and they send us all the supplies and no instructions, and we have to Internet build it. Oh, hilarious, though at the end, the fire. Homer Simpson tried to build a fireplace once, and they show him, and he's looking at the picture at the end, and then he moves the picture out of the way and this Tim Burton machine is in his backyard, and then it just crumbles and lights on fire for no reason. It's hilarious. That's what I expected. Perfect. Anyway, let me just fire that over to you there, Brett. This photo of my glorious yard, My lights all straightened out for you. What a beautiful sunset that was. I caught this. Perfect. You can put this up on the. On the page. I'll send it to. I'll send it to the HMS thread. Y' all get a good shot of that. Send me my Christmas card this year. I did that anyway. It's what you do. England. And this is good for everybody. England is usually kind of a bellwether thing for how we move next. Europe. Europe is something we usually follow after a judge in Europe just ruled that it's. Calling your boss isn't a firing offense. Isn't that Fantastic?

[Brett]

Get you 40 grand.

[John]

Yeah. $40,000 maybe. Just called a boss a. You're a. And they're like, well, you're fired. You can't do that. That's insubordinates. And judge was like, nope. So that's going to leak over the pond and come over here soon.

[Brett]

And, well, there's. You know, the other good side of it is how he. He fired her. He and his wife. The response. At least it was only 40 grand. Yeah, well, look, don't call me an the head.

[John]

That's right.

[Brett]

Or my wife.

[John]

Your wife's A dickhead, though.

[Brett]

That's it. Pack your kit and F off.

[John]

Yeah, well, you know, you're using salty language back and forth, but that's allowed. But it isn't in this situation. And I'm not sure what brought it on, but this lady named Carrie Herbert worked at a scaffolding and brickwork company. I'll be starting one of those soon, so she can come work for me.

[Brett]

You know, that's gonna be. That language is flying around there on that company.

[John]

It might be a guy, Carrie. Oh, yeah, it's construction. You can this and you and dickhead this. And it's not enough to get fired. It was an emotional response. You can't be emotional at work. The boss can't be emotional. The employees can't be emotional, running around calling each other names and emotions, stirring it up. But give it a try today. And if you get fired, I know it's an English court case at this point, but you can use it as the precedent to say. Now hold on a second. You know, if you work at national bank of Arizona, please try it with the CEO. He's a good friend of mine. We'll test his. Test him out. I've been calling him a dickhead since the fifth grade. You're not wrong. Yeah, that's a pretty good run right there. I think that's a pretty. Pretty nice thing. Now, in this place, we've had employees that have actually taken swings at bosses before and showed up to work the next day. We had one guy come up and grabbed the vagina of a co worker's wife. And he still stayed here for a little bit.

[Podcast Host]

Flying that one.

[John]

He decided to get really drunk. And when he's drunk, he says the N word a lot. And he did that about nine times at the Christmas party, and he was still here the next day giving away dusty bottles of alcohol he wasn't allowed to have in the house anymore. Gives his wife put a stop to that. Greatest moment ever. She made him take all the d dusty bottles of Jack Daniels and give them away as Christmas presents. The day after the N word tirade at the Christmas party. That's my. That's probably my favorite moment working here was that. That was pretty outstanding. So, yeah, give it a try today. It's not enough. Your boss gets emotional. An emotional reaction. I just go in there and just go, hey, morning, dickhead. What? What? What? Larry, step into my office. Did you just call me a dickhead? Yes, sir, I did. I can't fire you for that. But I got my eyes on you check, McFeelings. Anyway, try it today. I'm not gonna call Tripp a dickhead. That's crazy talk. He calls me that all the time. So fair about, you know, turnabout's fair play. You're nothing but a dick. You're an idiot. He says it to me all the time. Yesterday at the Steelers game, my friend John Sharpnak has grown a blond Hitler mustache, and he doesn't realize he's done it. He thinks it's a cool mustache, but it isn't because it only shows right where Hitler's does. And then the outsides of it are blonde. Tripp's sitting, and he's got a recliner there, and John's standing next to me, and we're kind of behind Tripp. And for some reason, the conversation started. It's like, hey, Shardnick, Halloween's right around the corner. You should actually go as Hitler. And then everybody started to talk about what he needed for a Hitler costume. And I'm like, I don't want to say, guys, but usually I'm not the voice of reason in any situation whatsoever. Pretty much this conversation might be the worst ideas I've ever heard in my life that are being considered. And I said, you can ask this. This guy here. I'm never the dude who puts this in the right perspective. And Trip goes, yeah, I can back that up. He wouldn't. If he's the voice of reason, it's bad. But they had this. And then. So we. So then, because I've had a great weekend of decision making and skills, I compromised and said, you need to go out as Charlie Chaplin. There you go. That is. That makes the other people racist.

[Podcast Host]

It's a trick with the top hat and the cane.

[John]

You take the top hat off for a little while, you walk around with Chaplin and the derby's in his hand, though. Yeah. And then you just kind of smash your cane into the ground. Do the waddle black suit. Yeah, you could do the waddle if you want. Or you just walk into the party dressed as Charlie Chaplin. Lots of folks are going to think you're the other. Lots of folks. And then they'll be like, how dare you? And I'm like, it's America's little clown. Like, what are you talking about? We loved Charlie Chaplin. He was cinema's first comedian. Who's Charlie Chaplin? You have a real hang up on things. Jew hater. And then walk away, waddle away after that. If you get to say Jew hater and then do the Charlie Chaplin Walk and spin after. It's the greatest day of your life. You came to my party is Hitler. I did no such thing. Jew hater. Did they just walk away? Practice the walk though, because if you screw that up, it does kind of look like you might be goose stepping. But yeah, so a lot of that stuff went down also on the weekend, I have to say I'll be the one who pushes back out loud on this. Hey, YouTube TV, you this weekend. You got a great operation here. You're overcharging everybody for not only your service, but this football package, right? My bill came and I'm like, It's astronomical. My TV used to be. It was better. John McCain was wrong. A la carte TV is costing us thousands more. It's crazy how much TV costs now with all your apps and when you add it all up when it's a bunch of $10 bills, you don't think it's much. But my Bill came to YouTube TV was like $400 because it came half of the NFL package show up. So I'm like, all right, I'm pretty happy with that. That's fine. Then I started to do the math and I'm paying a lot for TV and like I've got Hulu. I watch one show on that I Apple tv. I've watched one show on that peacock only for op Live. I have something called Philo to watch old TV shows. I've pretty much seen them all now. Like it's a ton of tv. So I expect the one that cost me the most, which is my YouTube TV, to be catering to me. If algorithms are really a thing and you know what I like based on what I watch, then don't put the mother WNBA in my multi views. Because after the Steelers game was over, I took a little break and I'm like, I'll put four on the screen. You can put four games at once, right?

[Brett]

Yeah, the quad.

[John]

Yeah. Holmberg's morning sickness. Medicate. KU pd Holmberg's morning sickness. I had to. I had to build my own to get it right. Because the Indiana Fever game or the Mystics or Valkyrie or whatever the they call themselves somehow got mixed up into all the multiviews. It's sports. It's Sunday sports. The WNBA is not included. Anybody interested in the WNBA is not keeping their eye on it with football. They're watching that and maybe like Melissa Etheridge on a loop. Nobody wants that in their multi view. How dare you? It's the worst because it was multiple times and different ones. I Could mix in like, what was it? The Broncos and Titans. And that was in there. And then that went away and they moved in a different WNBA game. Instead of giving me four football games, I always had this WNBA thing to wrestle.

[Brett]

Classic in there.

[John]

Yeah, yeah. Show me like the bears of the 50s. If I'm a Bears fan, that would have meant something to me. Get a 30 for 30 up there. NFL Network, where they're just doing game day highlights all day. Show me some. Nobody wants the WNBA in the multi view. This thing's supposed to be learning me as much as I'm paying for tv. And you know what it does? Learn me? Goddamn commercials. My Apple TV through that YouTube connection knows when I look something up on my phone because I get commercials for it on TV just for me. I have four TVs in my bar and each one is connected to the apple. If they're all on the same channel, the commercials are different because each one has its own apple. So each one's feeding me something. Every lubrication company out there, tons of that. Cherry lube. Goggles. Don't you need goggles? It's like the closest, you know, honor health gloves. Like, it's tons of stuff.

[Brett]

J date.

[John]

Totally. Yeah, totally. Tons of stuff. I bought one of those una beds, whatever those interlocking frames are. And by the way, I put a Verlo mattress on them. Go to Verlo.

[Brett]

Good combo.

[John]

Oh, my God. The mattress is a Verlo. I used to do tuft and needle stuff. Then they got bought by Serta. These Verlo mattresses are ridiculous. Jonathan, who runs Verlo?

[Brett]

Jonathan.

[John]

Jonathan. We're also going to buy half a cow together. So I've gotten close with Jonathan. This is the beef guy. But the mattress, the pillow with the cutout for your. If you're a side sleeper, you can't. This is an unsolicited moment right now, but these matches are ridiculously good. And you can redo them. He builds them right there in the shop and they're layered. So if you're like, this is a little too firm. He opens it up, pulls out the thing, puts it in another thing, and then when it wears out, open it up, pull it all out, put in new stuff. It's the last match.

[Brett]

Come on.

[John]

Come. Yeah. It's incredible. It's awesome. And Jonathan's, you know, local Arizona guy bought into this thing. He just wants it to work. I'm telling you right now, it's outrageous. But. And now I've talked about that. I'll probably get commercials for Verlo anyway, so I gotta get one. Oh, run. It's over there in Glendale. I got two of them. That's outstanding. Like they're really good. Any in dog beds bought little dog bed, dog matches. And you open it up and you can just see what's in there. You're like, oh, this all changes. And there's springs and all that and you can just change them out. It's a great technology. But my TV will now advertise to me those beds because they know I was interested. And I've looked since at like maybe I'll get another bed frame and put it in there and have the rental house has. I need frames for that. So loading up on that stuff in the tl. But it hasn't learned yet, even though it's catering to my needs for advertising. That WNBA action does not need to be in a multi view. Go yourself, YouTube. Wasn't Trump just sitting there with all those tech giants a few days ago where they were kissing his ass? Yeah, that dinner, couldn't it. Could you just get it to where the WNBA isn't on multi view? I think that's a make America great again. And start by getting rid of the WNBA and my multi view.

[Podcast Host]

Maybe your phone picked up how much we were talking about green dildos a couple weeks ago and that could be one hit.

[John]

The hit the turf in Indianapolis yesterday.

[Brett]

I don't know if you saw that in Cleveland.

[John]

Oh, did they throw in at Cleveland?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John]

Well, that was the most entertaining part of that. In fact, that's the longest play of the game. If somebody threw from the crowd to the field a green dildo and it went longer than 7 yards, that's longer than the Bengals had all through the second half. That had to be horrible to watch. Just horrible. Anyway, here's another thing. In the pregame interview with the. With Lamar Intelligence Jackson. That's what they call him. That's his new nickname. IA Eternal Affairs. This guy gets it done. He's the smartest guy in the room. They asked him who his favorite player was growing up. I'm out of my game. After Michael Vick. He was. He loves Michael Vick. Isn't that sort of the same as a running back saying, I just love O.J. simpson? Isn't it off limits to say Michael Vic's your favorite? Shouldn't that be frowned upon? Like the dude did horrible stuff. Isn't it also kind of like saying Ray Carruth was a great route runner? Like you just can't say it anymore.

[Brett]

Yeah, but I guess if you. He'd match up his game.

[John]

Okay, fine, it's similar, but there were a lot of running backs who were similar to O.J. and after 19, 95, 96, you stopped saying O.J. was your favorite.

[Brett]

But Vic's back in the.

[John]

No, I know, but you still don't say he's your favorite. You know, what's that guy's name? The murderer? Hernandez. Aaron Hernandez. You don't hear a lot of tight ends going, I model it all after Hernandez. Like, you just know better. After a massive felony and horrible killings of anything, George Kittle's time to step up. Yeah, if Kittle said it's like, look, I know it's gonn fallen some deaf ears here, but nobody ran routes like Aaron Hernandez like does. You just don't bring him up anymore. You ignore it. Justin Tucker came and then he also.

[Brett]

The, I mean, one of the interviews was talking about there's going to be a documentary coming out about the black quarterback.

[John]

Oh, that's great. That's fine. But. And Michael Vick will be in there. But isn't it time like even the bills, when OJ. OJ's innocent, by the way. Away or not guilty. OJ wasn't convicted. He ended up going to jail for something else. So he's, he's a pariah. The Bills took him off their ring of honor. You know, the hall of Fame had some. What do we do? Like, there was a whole lot of stuff that they just stopped. I still love when the Bills give out number 32 though. Cuz I can't not see it. Like when he's out and some dude jogs on the field, there's number 32 for the bills. You're like, that's awesome. That is the last number I would take if I was a Bill. I mean, you could have a hundred players on the, on the team. You'd be like, what number's available? Only 32. I'll be double zero.

[Brett]

What are the chance of you making it?

[John]

You're not making that team. No. If they give you 32 for three weeks, you're a preseason cut. Give him number 32. He won't be here long. We can't put that on the field. That's insanity. But Michael Vick should, like, somebody should get in his ear and whisper, hey, dummy. Because that's how you have to start all conversations with him. Know you're talking about him and say, you can't say Michael Vick's your favorite. They just. But again, they turned a Blind eye to that whole thing. And before anybody emails and said he did his time for racketeering, he dodged it. He, he did a terrible deal to get his time done for racketeering and maybe I think obstruction. That's what Ray Lewis did. Obstruction of justice. Ray Lewis got away with it.

[Brett]

He crashed the party.

[John]

He got away with it last night. Yeah. And people still are like, but he didn't like, look as much as I think Ray Lewis did terrible stuff. He never got caught. Like, he got in there. He got. He went to jail for obstruction of justice because he lied to the cops about who was there. Essentially. Ray wasn't a murderer. He is. But Michael Vick did read the book. Michael Vick should not be in the public eye.

[Brett]

Justin Tucker's not guilty yet.

[John]

Not yet. And he's completely banned Deshaun Watson. Nobody's going to say, oh, Deshaun Watson was my favorite quarterback. People don't associate him with being a great quarterback anymore. All I'm saying, Lamar, but you're dumb as a stump. So it's hard to stop saying Michael Vick's your favorite quarterback. There's been a lot of quarterbacks in the past that have been. Go with Doug Williams, Dante Culpepper. If you want to go down the Orin Moon or Moon the black quarterback route, just say so. Many have. Have come before me to set the way. I mean, DONOVAN Look, Donovan McNabb. There's. But he's not like Michael Vick. Like Lamar Jackson and Michael Vick do have that commonality. That stuff he did last night late in the game when he did that scramble and he was, it was a 70 yard run to get 19 yards on third and 11. And it was just, it was a minute amongst boys. He was toying with the defense. I text LSR at the time, I'm like, how is he that much more athletic than the NFL's defenses? Like any of the worst team in football, he shouldn't be able to just kind of, you know, like whenever you played street football with the one kid that was better, remember when you played flag football and there was always that guy that just had that one little side and we're like, we can't catch him. We just can't catch him. He does that in the NFL. He's remarkable. He's dumb and I hate him with a passion. But there's no denying that some of, some of the stuff he does is beyond fast. His instincts are unmatched, maybe the best of all time. Like, it's unmatched to watch that guy do stuff to where he just subtly moves and guys fall down. It's incredible what he's doing, but he is dumb as a stump. And saying, Michael Vic's your favorite player. Should be the same. Here's a fun fact.

[Brett]

It's a tough favorite.

[John]

Michael Vick used to take dogs that were suffering and pick them up by the legs and smash them into the ground until they were dead. Oh, Michael Vick used to like to take dogs and put them in puddles when they were incapacitated from the fights he made them do and attach electrodes to them and electrocute them in puddles of water to kill them. That's the Michael Vick that nobody talks about. That's the dude who did that regularly. He used to like to pick up the back legs of a dog while another guy picked up the front legs of a dog and smashed their spines over posts. That's the Michael Vick that people don't talk about. That's the dude everybody's like, he did his time. No, he didn't. I know I'm a dog freak, but he shouldn't be mentioned in that kind of stuff at all. He shouldn't ever be brought up as a decent person again. He has to go live his life with that, Rebuild it some other way. But the fact they turn a blind eye to all the things that guy did because they never really made it public. You read that book, there's about seven pages that'll make you want to throw a punch through a concrete wall. So for him to sit there, and nobody said, like, if I was the interviewer, like, who. Who do you model your game at? Who's your favorite? Oh, growing up, Michael Vick was the best. He's my favorite. I'm like, you know, he smashed dog spines in half for fun. You remember that. Now, let's not bring up Michael Vick anymore because I don't associate him with football anymore. He. He kind of lost that right. And then he went out there, got on his knees with about four minutes left, opened his mouth, and let the Bills have at that little face of his for 4 minutes and 23 seconds because he blew it. Last two games he's played, the Bills have absolutely made him kneel. Oh, it's so good. I've got pictures of it from last night as he was walking off the field. My favorite one was Derrick Henry after the kick went through because he. He blew it. He's the one who fumbled the game away last night, which was great. And there's sad Lamar and his stupid skull cap that he wears. I hate that. There he is. I take pictures of him every time he's sad. I love sad Lamar Jackson. Anyway, yeah, go ahead and say Michael Vick's your favorite player.

[Brett]

He wears that. It reminds me of the Willy Wonka.

[John]

He'S got in the safe room. In the clean room. Yeah, that's what. When he wears the white uniform and Lamar puts the safety hat on and his dumb little face pokes out of the hole. I can't stand him. But I will say this. He's no Michael Vick. And that's a good thing. Nobody should ever aspire to like that. He ruined the privilege of being mentioned as a great. Just he could run. That's great O.J. you can't really bring it up, dude. At 2,000 yards in 14 games, one year we don't talk about O.J. nobody ever goes back. And he's one of the greatest of all time. Yeah, he is. Let's ignore it. I think they kind of snuck him into that hundredth anniversary season of the best players that ever played. He was like 16th or something. Like, I was like, I know Jay Simpson's in there too. Next. They don't. They're not showing a lot of highlights. They're not getting in on that thing. Let's do the same for Michael. Even though he does a pregame show and he's, you know, he's not even very good at that. 98k u p d Holmberg's morning sickness to get that, two things. Michael Vick needs to never be mentioned as like, oh, my favorite. And the WNBA can't be in multi views anymore, ever. So, yeah, spread the word about Michael Vick. Whenever somebody tries to say, oh, he didn't do anything, talk about it, read about, get to know what he did. Get to. Because he did it a lot. He oversaw an awful lot of horrible stuff and had no problem with it till he got caught at all. The other thing in sports that happened.

[Brett]

I was going to say in the wnba, Caitlin Clark is out.

[John]

Yeah, she has been since July. Nobody knew.

[Brett]

And she'll still have the second most assists this year in the.

[John]

She played two weeks and she's like the assist leader for the whole season. Nobody caught her. Oh, I don't know. She stopped playing like July 15th and then just announced, I'm not coming back. And by the way, I'm probably going to win the triple crown or whatever crap league this is. The other thing in sports that I want to talk about is the viral Phillies home run. Did you see that? Yeah. Horrible. Harrison Bader hits a home run out into the outfield. Aaron Phillies. Yeah. There's some ups. There's some seats not sold.

[Podcast Host]

There's some people not there in Miami. I mean.

[John]

Yeah, it's not fair. And the ball bounces around a little bit and there. And a guy runs over from his section and sees the ball bouncing, gets in front of this slow woman with a car. I mean, the ultimate Karen haircut with that lesbian gray. I think that's the name of it on the Clarol box Lesbian gray. And it kind of. It's more a bob, but it's also a. It's like a bi level. It looks like she's. She just jumped out of a 1988 yearbook. If, if, if. If you were to find a, like, Brady. If you had a fairy godmother back when you had your Subaru Outback.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John]

And she came by and she said, I'll make you a mate. And then she tapped her magic wand onto your Outback. This is the woman that would have appeared. She's a human Subaru Outback. Look at her. She is a human Subaru Outback. So this guy goes over, he gets the ball that's rolling around in an aisle, picks it up, goes over and puts it in his kid's guap.

[Brett]

Drew felt.

[John]

Well, it was a kid's birthday. Here you go. Belated birthday present for you, son. Happy birthday. Gives it to us. So. What a great moment. Dad and son have this Subaru Outback. Human being comes over and goes, that's mine. Freaks out. And the dude literally jumps when she yells. Because I would yell if he had his fist. Yeah, well, because there was going on. Crazy, angry little man. Absolutely. She thinks she's got a manageable haircut, but she looks like a little dude. That's my ball. You can't just go running over to another section. It's like. You can't. Since when? So he just goes, you know what?

[Brett]

Eff.

[John]

It pulls the ball out of the kid's glove, hands it to the lesbian. He just goes, look, son, that's the way we handle altercations. This meant a lot more to her than it does to me. Well, I don't know if you saw was in Philadelphia, but they were playing the Marlins, right?

[Podcast Host]

Yeah, I thought it was in.

[John]

It was in Philadelphia. Yeah, because then the Phillies went up.

[Brett]

I think it says in Marlins game. It was in Florida.

[John]

No, it was in Florida. Okay.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah, yeah.

[John]

So anyway, they start giving them all sorts of stuff like this viral immediately. Like, everybody. It was like that CEO on the kiss got to meet Harrison Bader. The kid did.

[Brett]

Got a gift bag.

[John]

They gave the family an rv.

[Podcast Host]

Wait, what?

[John]

That was on the Internet? Yeah, they had some sort of fundraiser thing, and some RV went their way. They, like, got a car. I don't know if they're keeping it, but it was donated. Like, here. You need to travel the country in style now. Like, what in the world?

[Brett]

And his final quote was amazing. Amazing.

[John]

What was that?

[Brett]

I hope that ball means a lot to her.

[John]

Well, we can ask him.

[Brett]

What do you feel? You know?

[John]

Here's the play. So the guy walks over and gets the ball. I mean, nobody else even tried. Puts it in his son's glove. They hug the guy, and then she runs over and grabs him, and he. He's like, what the hell? And she is shouting him down. He's like, oh, it went right over there. I'm allowed in that one, bro. And then the lesbian is furious. Oh, the. The Cruella De Vil hairstyle is a terrible idea. I want the top to be gray, and I want underneath to be. Yeah. Right out of the kid's glove. And she seems okay with it.

[Brett]

Show the beginning again. I don't even see, like, where her justification for the scramble is.

[John]

There isn't any. It's just. She's the closest one that couldn't get to it. She dropped it. He came over and took it.

[Podcast Host]

It's a scramble, which is every home run or foul ball or whatever, and.

[John]

She flipped out because it fell out of her. I've watched a ball bounce off of a guy and get caught by someone else, and that's who keeps the ball.

[Brett]

The guy who catches it doesn't know how it works.

[John]

No. Because she's crazy.

[Brett]

How many times has it gone out of three or four hands?

[John]

You know what I hope? I hope the dad turned to his son and say, and that is why we hate lesbians. I mean, what the angry lesb. Yeah, she's. She's out of her mind, and we need to find. So there they are giving them cameras, guys. Was a kid being his home run ball. So the Marlins went and gave him a bunch of prizes. Sure. That he had a little price pack and some baseballs to make, and they put that up on the big screen, too. And the crowd was all happy with it on our game. So, yeah, show the mean lesbian, though, excited.

[Mo]

He's got a baseball there for both.

[John]

Himself and his sister, as well as a. A goodie bag full of never forget, don't trust a lesbian. And then they walked away. It was an amazing moment in Miami. All around here, they put him up on the big screen. Meanwhile, Cruella deville is one section over, going by the Marlins. Very, very nice job. This is good stuff. Good things happen to good people. I mean, both kids brought their clubs.

[Brett]

Look at that.

[John]

They both have their gloves. They're Phillies fans. It's one of their favorite players. Doing a real good job to hold it in. Cuz wouldn't it have been better had it turned other way and he just done that? Oh, no.

[Brett]

If it was a Marlins family.

[John]

Look, if that happened in Philadelphia, it would have been handled in the stands.

[Podcast Host]

Oh, yeah.

[John]

Down in Miami in that resort town, that would have happened. Yeah. I was reading last night online that there was like some sort of weird gofundme that started. I don't even know if the family's involved in it. And they got an RV and some money and what the hell. But there he is at the end meeting Harrison Bader. Like they took him down into the. Yeah, this kid. Best thing that ever happened to him is that that lesbian went insane. And right now, ladies, if you're headed towards the hairdressers and you're like, oh, I'm getting the underneath part of my hair shaved and it's gonna be black and then I'm gonna have this weird gray mop on top of it. You're going to look insane. No one looks good with that hair cut. No one looks good with Cruella De Vil's hair. Do something smart about. Have you never seen the Disney movie? She's the villain. Don't go half black, half white. Sia got away with it because she's talented. You're not gonna. You're an accountant or a lady who works at a title agency. You're not doing it. It's not working.

[Brett]

This ball thing catching at games or events is getting out of hand. And what CEO is she?

[John]

Yeah, all CEOs. They're all. We'll find out who she is. But did they get a name for the CR. Crazy?

[Podcast Host]

Oh, yeah, yeah.

[John]

What's her name?

[Podcast Host]

I gotta find it. But.

[John]

But then the dad went on some show.

[Brett]

No, they. They don't say it in this article.

[Podcast Host]

It's out there, though, because I've.

[John]

But, you know, they just call her the Phillies.

[Podcast Host]

From what I heard, she. She actually lost her job and everything.

[John]

Like, because of this.

[Podcast Host]

That's what I heard. I'm looking into it right now.

[John]

I'm not all for people losing their jobs, for their reactions at a ballpark. You don't know. She might have been drunk. I don't think she's a fun.

[Brett]

That guy said everything right about, like, look, controversy, Son. Let me teach a lesson here.

[John]

Well, in my opinion, he taught a lesson to his son to not stand up for himself. They should have kept that ball. In the end, it worked out better for him. But at that moment, you barked that lesbian.

[Brett]

His lesson, you know, to him, saying, I wanted to set an example. How to de escalate a situation in front of my son.

[John]

It's a woman escalation. You had to go through the metal detectors, too. Pretty sure you're gonna be right. And if she throws the first punch now you've got a lawsuit and a ball. It's a smart move.

[Podcast Host]

Just got one of those hyphenated names, too. Cheryl Richardson Wagner. According to the Sporting.

[John]

Oh, yeah, yeah. Cause her and her partner had to marry, and they got hyphens. The hyphens come with a wedding ring. The. Yeah, My dad, Dan, Kurt, probably, too. The de escalation would have been, go yourself, lady. The ball's the kids. Now. You want to take it out of his glove. You do do it. And then you get her pulling that out of the glove. I'd be like, look at this woman stealing my son's baseball there. That would not have been a de escalation. The way he did it. That would have been. I would have definitely tried to escalate with that little lady. I wouldn't have punched her or anything, but she brought it over to me.

[Podcast Host]

Well, they were booing her, and she was throwing the fingers up and everything.

[John]

She's a horrible human being. Just Cruella De Ville. She's got the haircut, but, yeah. I mean, in. In the weather, in the Phillies. She was a Phillies fan, too. I went to Kansas City last year to watch the Phillies and Royals play. The Phillies fans are loud and awful. Philadelphia people are 100% across the board that. But they were fun. Like, if a ball came their way. Like, what they are is that terrible, like, loud person. But they protect children, like, in the weirdest way ever. Like, if anybody tried to take a ball from a kid, the whole place would erupt. Not in Miami, evidently. They're a little calmer. But, man, she's a horrible woman.

[Brett]

Not enough people there.

[John]

Yeah, that must have been it. But there's no way. I know. Kurt would have probably fought. Oh, yeah, the lesbian. My dad. I don't. Your dad probably would have Been like, you know what? You go yourself. It would have been awesome to hear Torp do that. Go ahead. Try to take the ball out. It's like stealing a grilled cheese from my son. Good luck. This ball's mine. Man, that would have been a fun fight to watch. Brady's built a little like a lesbian. This lesbian is a lesbian.

[Brett]

She would have taken away.

[John]

No, she wouldn't have gotten. At 10 years old, your eyes just looking up at her like, go ahead, make my day. Hey, look at that lady wrestling. He's strong as an ox.

[Podcast Host]

Here's another angle that somebody just posted. Cause apparently she started saying the ball was to me or something like that.

[John]

It wasn't to you. It didn't have, like, a ribbon on it.

[Brett]

She missed her opportunity.

[John]

She dropped it. Yeah. And then ran over to him. That's her, man. She's screaming. You took it from. Yeah, maybe he did. You weren't in the same.

[Podcast Host]

Go faster.

[John]

Yeah, be better.

[Brett]

Oh, that's not her husband. That was next to her.

[John]

Don't worry about that.

[Brett]

Oh, geez.

[Podcast Host]

Not anymore.

[John]

Ready? Oh, I'm not. That wasn't her husband.

[Podcast Host]

It's her brother.

[John]

Maybe as a coworker. That woman doesn't have a husband. No chain. There's no way. There's no Maybe it used to be.

[Brett]

She bought a single ticket.

[John]

Yeah, she. She was there by herself. Her. Her mate was probably outside protesting something. They're those active, horrible people speaking. It's the haircut. I just. That haircut has to go. You immediately announce yourself as the world's worst person. I. I love, love the act of lesbianism. I think it's a fantastic and beautiful thing given to us by Brady's God. But when the haircut happens and then that starts to go, you just. You just went to, like, sports clips for lesbians. And then you walk out of there, and you look like Cruella de Vil. Don't do that.

[Brett]

Skunk.

[John]

Yeah, you say skunk. I'm with the skunk look. And so many women in their 50s and 60s do that. They're mad at men. They're. They're going through their second divorce. They don't. The future looks dim. And they get that weird gray and black hair on purpose. And you know what happens? They sit at Postinos with their friends. I don't know.

[Mo]

I just needed a change since Greg.

[John]

I think I'm just gonna go to women. Well, you got the right haircut for it. Then all their friends go, oh, it's great. She goes, yeah, I Just think it's fun. It's fun and it's easy. Yeah, well you're neither of those two things now.

[Brett]

Give me my ball.

[John]

Give me my ball back. I like it though, because that's the one good and bad thing about all this. Cameras everywhere, you out the horrible people and then sometimes you feel really bad for some folks who did something dumb.

[Brett]

And cuz the other one was at the US Open the.

[John]

Oh, that year stole that hat first.

[Brett]

Came out and said, oh yeah, I'm doing it for my kid. But then he goes. He had two excuses right off.

[John]

Look, he. All that guy needed to do, he stole the hat from that little boy. Cuz they're from the same country. The tennis player and the, the guy, right? Yeah. And he just swiped it. He got fanboy. He got too excited and he just. Everything was. He just yanked it away and he yanked it away. And that little boy's like, I think he was giving that to me and he just. And he stuffed it in a bag like he acted like it wasn't there. And then instead of just saying, dude, I lost my mind. I got so enamored and I screwed up. So whatever that kid needs, I'll. I'll get him one. I'll give him the hat. I feel horrible. Morning sickness. 98k u p d Holmberg's morning sickness. But he came out with excuses. And people like, you're just a jerk. He was a CEO. CEOs are horrible.

[Brett]

Well, that's the thing that they're coming out with now. CEOs.

[John]

Yeah. That's just not nice. Every time they're on TV outside of their jobs, they're doing terrible stuff to children. Or you can't have affairs anymore. Yeah, you can't even have a good CEO affair anymore because Coldplay will show you. And of all of them, that's the only one I kind of feel sorry for. Because we don't know their story at home. We don't know their true lies.

[Brett]

Well, you have, you know, two. It's like three in a row. I think someone left. It was McDonald's last year. The CEO for an affair.

[John]

Oh yeah, like you just can't have. Well, no, no, you can't have Monty. That guy got caught on screen. It's one thing to get caught in an affair. It's another to have the world get you and then you lose your job. That's not fair. Taking baseballs and hats and stuff from kids at sporting events, that's just never. It doesn't matter what you're going through at home. You can't do that if you're at the front row of the USC Open. You're not as downtrodden and you can't use Excel. Life's got me down. It's like, no, you were having a nice day.

[Brett]

And you see it. I mean, when, you know, even shooting those T shirts back in the day.

[John]

Oh, my God, it's like you're shooting them. I watched a gold bar, a mountain of a woman at a Coyotes game back when they were at the arena downtown and they had a blimp that used to float tickets from movies.

[Podcast Host]

I remember that.

[John]

And a big fat lady. And I mean, before everybody was fat. This is the late 90s when people were still sort of okay, in shape. Not like today, before bbls. And she had one naturally, it was massive. And she did a tumble two, like, bounced off of a row and fell a row ahead of that and picked up the ticket. And a little kid was standing next to her like, you can have it. Like she was the rock from. But because of Raiders of the Lost Ark, she just kept rolling down the hills. But she took it and picked it up. You know what it was for? For one, admittance to a movie that wasn't Special Engagement at AMC theaters. So it had to be a movie that was out for a little while. It was like $4 at the time. It was like a 4.

[Brett]

Get into it.

[John]

Well, no, you could get in. You're getting in. There's no sellouts on these. It was every movie that's like, we're just about to leave the theaters, but you can go to it.

[Podcast Host]

It's about to hit the dollar theaters.

[John]

Remember when it was like the first couple weeks, movies that came out were Special Engagement. You couldn't use coupons or anything like that. They were given. And they're floating down like. Like they. They like little kites and they're flying all over like butterflies. And this fat lady fell two rows and there's a little kid there. I thought she was going to kill him. She didn't care.

[Brett]

And because of that, a blimp. Canceled the blimp.

[John]

They stopped doing the blimp. That's it. They're like, we're gonna have some fat American's getting too fat to have them chase flying paper through the air like butterflies. She got lost. That was hers. Like, in her mind, she's like, I'm catching that and I'm moving heaven and earth to do it. And kids had to move and people got like, she fell down Ahead of them. Thank God it was a Coyotes game. No one was there. She fell two solid empty aisles ahead. And then of course, me and I think I was with my friend Marcus, but we were laughing the whole time because watching a fat lady fall two aisles, that's hard to do. There's only space for one fall. She bounced off the one set of seats and went another aisle ahead and then still managed to. She got her ticket. And then everybody's like, what is it? What is it? One admittance to an AFC theater. Non special engagement film. Not on a weekend. This sucks. And she had bruises all over. And that wasn't from the fall. It was from the 10 pound, 10 foot sticks people used to poke her with, keep her away.

[Podcast Host]

Anyway, apparently there's somebody on Facebook with that name. And she just posted.

[John]

Lesbian's name.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah. Saying that.

[John]

Okay, everyone, I'm not the crazy Philly mom, but I sure would love to be as thin as she is. What? And move as fast. I'm a Red Sox fan, so. Cheryl Richardson Wagner, the Red Sox fan, admittedly.

[Podcast Host]

And then she posted. So that. I guess that's her.

[John]

That's what she looks. Oh, that looks just like her. She's got that same hair.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah.

[John]

They all look like Beth McDonald's. Everybody looks like Beth with her husband. Everyone is Beth. Oh my God, the whole world, all women in their 50s and 60s are turning into Beth McDonald from Kids AZ. Yeah. And if I'm talking to you right now and you're a lady with the gray hair with the shaved underneath that's black, we'll get that fixed every day. Every day.

[Podcast Host]

Right now.

[John]

Right now. Nobody thinks that looks good. It isn't fun. You're gonna. It's fun. No, it isn't. I think it's just fun. It's easy and it's fun. I just get up and I go, it's not fun. You look crazy. And you're gonna. You're gonna go crazy. That hair makes you crazy. Certain haircuts immediately make you crazy. So even if you do something a little bit bit off, it amplifies it by like a thousand. So keep saying that. Oh, it's fun. People think it's fun. It's not. Nobody thinks it's fun. Nobody just has the courage to be like me and say, you look like a crazy lesbian.

[Brett]

It's fun.

[John]

Now give me my ball. Yeah, it's fun. Cuz that hair will make you crazy. It's like. It's like that monkey paw, you know? You think it's fun. That you're going to go nuts by the third wish. I don't know. I just went in there and I told him. I said, well, we'll just do something. Greg and I aren't together anymore, so I just want to be fun. Make it easy. Make it simple. Make it black and white. Make me Cruella Devil. I'm gonna steal from children. Fun. If you say that about your hair, deep down you know it's not fun. Cause that just basically means you cut off all your femininity. It's fun. It's the minute you gotta divorce your wife. If Mathias ever came home with a fun hair haircut, it's over. Yeah.

[Podcast Host]

Cordone. Cordone.

[John]

Yep. Where'd your hair go? I cut it off. It's fun.

[Brett]

Don't leave your house, Brett.

[John]

Fun for who? It's not fun for me. I'm dating a boy. It's fun. You look like the Beatles. What happened to your hair? Never cut. If you. If you have short hair, you can have short hair. If it started short. If you've ever had long hair, don't cut your hair. It's not fun. You look like a fraggle or a beetle. When it's over. And you're the one who has to convince everybody you're having a good time. That's why your hair became fun. Hair's not fun. That's you feeling fun. It's so much fun. It's fun. Yeah, that's what you keep saying that out loud. It's never going to be true. Then you look at women with beautiful hair and you get mad at them. And then your stupid fun haircut turns you into a nut bag who starts stealing baseballs from kids. It's the haircut. What did this. Not to mention probably Greg, her ex husband that pushed her towards lesbianism. Whatever that guy did. I don't need a man. Oh, boy. Here we go and get a fun haircut. And I don't need a man. Oh, God, she's intolerable. None of. None of you have fun hair. Nothing's fun unless it's like. It's like hairsprayed. So heavy. It's like motorcycle handlebars. That's the only hair I can think of that would be fun. No guy's ever said that. My wife, she's got four. Fun hair. It's never been a thing. It's not. There's no such thing. It's fun. Fun is a swing or a slide. It's never your hair. Ever. Don't ever cut it. You look like a Knife. Brett, what do you got on the big board of Musical Truth?

[Podcast Host]

All right, Action Dried shop. Bringing you guys the wake up song. It looks like we're out of the 100 teens for now.

[John]

Does it?

[Podcast Host]

Yeah, that's. That's what I'm hearing.

[John]

So weather line all week. Last week, Brett was supposed to be under a hundred for the next two weeks. And it's 101 today, 104 yesterday, 101.

[Podcast Host]

Not in the teens.

[John]

Miserable.

[Podcast Host]

Get those early morning bike rides in, get those evening bike rides in and go to Action Ride Shop and get everything you're going to need for those rides. New bike, you need the gear, whatever. They got all the things that you're going to need at two locations over there at Gilbert Road and Southern, the OG and of course the one right off the HW trailhead at Power Road and McDowell.

[John]

It is Action Ride Shop.

[Podcast Host]

ActionRide shop.com.

[John]

Sean Phils asks, what's the guy equivalent to that haircut? And? And he suggests it's the flat top. I think he might be on to something there. If a dude just goes from like having nice hair to a flat top, 50s buzz cut, looks like a shooter from the 50s, like a clock tower guy or.

[Podcast Host]

Yeah, or he's got a haircut like Thriller.

[John]

Thriller like went Lee Harvey Oswald with his hair. Yeah. It's just drastic. Yeah. Look, if you ever meet a guy and he's like, well, I really like her. She's got fun hair. It's like we're basically calling you crazy. Never describe it. Brett, I want you to date this girl I know. Oh, yeah, Describe her. Oh, she's got a great body face. Got you fun hair. No dude ever. What's wrong with her fun hair? What do you mean? Oh, my gosh, she just got it cut. Cause her last boyfriend was drove her through. She's mentally insane. So she cut her hair real short and then she dyed it gray and then underneath bleached, like all the shaved parts black or dyed that black. Great.

[Podcast Host]

I got to go meet her at title nine for our first date.

[John]

Or wants to meet you at the arena and wait for autographs from the WNBA players as they leave on their tricycle or whatever they go their transport. I know it's not nice cars they all leave in like opals. All right, on the list, Salt and Pepo.

[Podcast Host]

What a man for John Juno's Villa.

[John]

I like that Juno's Villa is a good name for me.

[Podcast Host]

Rollins band liar for your story. Worry because nobody believes you put those.

[John]

Light bulbs it should be up on Facebook right now. I did it myself. And you can see my equipment.

[Podcast Host]

Sleep Token, the warning. Pantera. Five minutes alone for the Phillies. Karen, AC DC Metallica, Del Shannon, Handyman. I don't know that song. Judas Priest, Electric Eye for your lights. Lightning Crashes.

[John]

Handyman is James Taylor, isn't it? I don't know. That's what that guy wrote. I didn't look at it.

[Brett]

Yeah, yes, that one.

[Podcast Host]

But I didn't look into it. But I think Primal Concrete Wedge is pretty appropriate for your concrete worth this weekend.

[John]

Yeah, Handyman is. I'm pretty sure that. I mean, I can look at Taylor. Handyman. I don't know if that's a. I'm pretty sure that's James. Yeah, that's James Taylor. That's the. Hey, guys.

[Podcast Host]

Well, there is a.

[Brett]

There's a Delta version, too, for Del Shannon.

[John]

Del Shannon's got a handyman as well. I don't need a handyman anymore. Him Self sufficient. DIY guy. Jesus. I've never heard Dell Shannon's Handy Man. Same song. The same one as James. I didn't know this was a remake. How old is Our audience is wild. Play a little Del Shannon this morning. Like, okay. How are you still alive? How old are you? I'm 108. I just wanted to hear a little Del Shannon this morning. Great conversation about the fun hair. I thought that was funny. All right, See you. My wife did that back in the 30s. All right, whatever. Whatever. You want to pick?

[Podcast Host]

Well, a couple came in for your primal concrete sludge, so.

[John]

All right, let's do it. Primal concrete sledge. It's a little loaded up or you loaded? I don't know who's got it.

[Podcast Host]

That's probably not in the system.

[John]

Is that a cussy mess, too? I don't think so. I don't remember. Boy, oh, boy. Yeah. And I'll put. We'll post the pictures of my work this weekend. You will be blown away. And I know what's going to happen in the comments. Well, you didn't do blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. All right, look, you're just jealous you didn't get hired and that I did such a great job. So pipe it. Is what I say to you. Zip it. It was amazing.

[Brett]

So the song Handyman was written by Jimmy Jones and Otis Blackwell, and then Del Shannon recorded it.

[John]

Jerry Jones. Who?

[Brett]

Jimmy Jones and Otis Black.

[John]

Oh, okay.

[Brett]

In 1959.

[John]

I like the James Taylor version. Listen to what I'm putting down. Hey, baby, I'm your handyman. I should sing that as I'm finishing up the lights later today. Yeah. I'm not the kind to use a pencil rule I'm handy with love and I'm no fool. Yeah. This is all. I think they wrote this for me. Perfect. You got it loaded? Yep. Let's do it. In the meantime, we'll jump into a modern era rather than the Del Shannon days. While you drive around your woody looking for the closest surf contest. I don't know who that guy was. Is Brian Wilson alive again and just calling in requests. It's time for a little Pantera here. Primal Concrete Sledge. Knock it out. It's out of control. Now.

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