09-09-25 - BR - TUE - Imagining Brady Changing Once He Receives His New Pig Kidney - Kid Gets Bit By Copperhead On Playground But School Muddies Up The Story

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 09-09-25 – BR – TUE – Imagining Brady Changing Once He Receives His New Pig Kidney / Kid Gets Bit By Copperhead On Playground But School Muddies Up The Story
Date: September 9, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, Dick Toledo

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Overview

In this lively episode of "Holmberg's Morning Sickness," the crew dives into bizarre current events, playful hypotheticals, and their trademark irreverent banter. The highlight is a comedic, imaginative exploration of what happens when Brady gets a pig kidney transplant—a springboard for jokes about identity, religion, and bodily transformation. Later, they analyze a sketchy school incident involving a snakebite cover-up, offering pointed skepticism and humor at the expense of educators. Mixed throughout are quirky news stories, fun facts, and the show’s penchant for pushing the envelope.

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Key Segments and Discussion Points

1. Brady the “Pigman”—Wild Hypotheticals and Irreverent Jokes

[00:46 - 06:20]

• Pig Kidney Transplant Banter: The hosts riff on the strange notion of Brady getting a pig kidney, pondering how it might change his life, relationships, and even his faith status.

  • John imagines the irony of Brady being “saved by a pig” rather than “killed by one,” subverting a running joke about his dietary preferences.
  • Jokes spiral about how a pig kidney could impact his interactions with Muslims (for whom pork is forbidden).
  • Holmberg: "I have the blood of a pig because it's technically filtered through a pig kidney... means you have the blood of the pig powered by swine." (03:39)
  • Brett chimes in with jokes about “Pigman” being untouchable in certain communities.

• New Identity and Superpowers:

  • Running joke about the “Pigman” persona—Brady potentially sporting a shirt with “Pig Inside” (a riff on Intel branding), and the idea that his blood now filters through pork.
  • Brett: "Jihad this." (05:56)
  • The group stretches the scenario, poking fun at possible hilarious consequences (altered breathing due to a new “snout,” or being targeted for having pig parts).

Notable Moment (Recurring Theme):

• Repeated mock-serious concerns about Muslims avoiding him, and the concept of the “trade center of pig man,” demonstrating the show’s off-kilter, provocative comedic style.

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2. Fun Facts, Trivia, and Product Recalls

[07:38 - 13:28]

• Holiday Shoutouts: The guys note it’s "Teddy Bear Day" and "International Box Wine Day," sparking quick jokes about the wording.

  • Brady: "Is it International Box Wine Day or box wine international––so it’s all boxes from other countries?" (08:06)
  • Brett: "I think you’re wrong. I just think it’s bad English." (08:29)

• Random Fun Facts:

  • Johnny Knoxville was once a stand-in for Keanu Reeves in Bram Stoker's Dracula (08:47).
  • The Monopoly board misspelled "Marvin Gardens" (real neighborhood is "Marven Gardens") and trivia about Monopoly properties’ real-world locations (09:21).
  • Smoking stats in China, with only 1.8% of women partaking versus 44% of men (10:01).
  • Brady: "How many Chinese women chew?" (10:14) –– turning the stat into a classic dad-joke.

• Product Recalls in 2025:

  • Alarming 40% rise over five years, with issues ranging from fires to amputations.
  • Major recalls: Bowflex dumbbells, expandable hoses, Shark Ninja pressure cookers (13:58).
  • Losses for companies can range “between 10 million and 50 million” (13:51).

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3. Family Games and Cheating at Monopoly

[14:16 - 16:16]

• Stories about family Monopoly sessions, with confessions of petty cheating.
  • John: “If you ever watch Monopoly with families, there’s always a guy—my dad used to do it. He’d take from the bank and put some... We’d catch him.” (14:33)
  • Trading stories about family game nights, Risk, Euchre, and cards.

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4. “Wild America” — Animal Antics and School Safety Scandal

[16:16 - 21:22]

• Rescue Story: Nurse saves a drunken raccoon from a moonshine dumpster (16:16).

  • Brady: “She didn’t go dumpster find a raccoon?” Brett: “Yep.” (16:43)

• Copperhead Snakebite at Daycare:

  • A four-year-old, Flagon, is bitten by a copperhead in a sandbox (17:18).
  • The school claims it's a splinter or broken finger; parents later take the child to the hospital, where the truth comes out.
  • The hosts express incredulity, suspecting a cover-up by the school.
    • Brady: “The people at the school were lying when they said it was a splinter or a broken finger. They knew it.” (18:47)
    • Brett: “They were trying to make an excuse why they didn't call 911.” (18:52)
    • Brady: “That story is so terribly fake, fabricated by those school people to save their own asses." (20:18)

Notable Quote:

• “If I was babysitting Kirby... I’d be giving her a hundred bucks a week for the next ten years to just say, ‘shut up about that whole thing.’ But getting bit by a snake at my house...” (21:01, Brady)

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5. Light-Hearted News: Music for Motion Sickness & KFC Jellybeans

[21:25 - 23:47]

• Study about Motion Sickness: Certain upbeat pop songs (Pharrell’s “Happy”, Timberlake’s “Can’t Stop the Feeling”, “Hakuna Matata”) help relieve car sickness.

  • Brett: "Hakuna Matata was effective also... it means no worries!" (21:53)
  • Brady relates with his friend Anthony who gets car sick.

• Valet Joyride and Novelty Snacks:

  • Miami valet is caught taking a customer’s Audi for a joyride. (22:16)
  • KFC announces jellybeans flavored like fried chicken, sweet corn, and gravy, releasing for Easter. (22:50)
    • Brady: “Those days are over for you, buddy.” (23:11), referencing Brady’s pig kidney limiting his diet.

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6. More Brady Report, Video Recaps & Bizarre Humor

[24:05 - 32:41]

• Video News & News Blunders:

  • The hosts poke fun at a news anchor’s repeated mistakes reading numbers (“a quarter of a million... I’m sorry... 250, hundred thousand...").
  • Brady: “This goes back to what Brady... All right, listen, this is Brady doing the exact same story in 2019.” (25:55)
  • Brett: “I don’t want to wear a butt plug.” (26:17)—an out-of-context drop played for laughs.

• Shock Videos Described:

  • Worker flattened by hot steel—“It just attacks him... it just melts that man.” (26:27)
  • Flaming bull runs through cage-enclosed audience (27:07). The guys debate the event’s likely location, guessing “Mexico.”
    • “It feels very much like la piñata on a Thursday.” (27:44, Brady)
  • Further irreverent and risqué videos described, including adult content—consistently met with disbelief or laughter.

• Pie Eating Contest and Pigman Persona:

  • Listeners joke about “Pigman” not being allowed to participate in the storm drain pie eating contest.
    • Brady: “Doctor is going to go: Sure. Eat as much pie as you’d like, pig man.” (28:24)
  • Teasing about passing the torch to other neighborhood kids; running gag with the name “Laser.”

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Brady on the Pig Kidney Transformation:

  • “You should get a shirt that just says ‘Careful, pig inside.’” (03:34)
  • “Before it was your caloric energy was powered by swine. Now your blood is literally to be filtered by pig parts.” (03:39)

• On School Snakebite Cover-up:

  • “That story is so terribly fake, fabricated by those school people to save their own asses.” (20:18, Brady)

• On Family Monopoly:

  • “You just took two 1-0s out of there—‘No, no, I passed go. No, you didn’t. Not even close.’ My dad would just steal.” (14:33, John)

• On Product Recalls:

  • “You’re talking about losses for the companies between 10 million and 50 million.” (13:51, Brett)

• Irreverent Observations:

  • “I love that daycares lie to the parents about a copperhead.” (23:49, Brady)
  • “It has a Mexico type vibe, doesn’t it?” (27:44, Brady, discussing bull video)

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Important Timestamps

• 00:46: Imagining Brady post–pig kidney; pigman persona jokes begin
• 03:39: “Powered by swine” and blood filtered through pig parts
• 05:56: “Jihad this.”—Pigman as a symbol
• 07:38: Brady Report—fun facts, Box Wine Day, Monopoly trivia
• 13:28: Alarming stats on product recalls
• 16:16: Wild America; drunk raccoon rescue
• 17:18: Copperhead snakebite and school cover-up
• 20:18: Hosts call out school's fabricated story
• 21:25: Study: Upbeat music helps motion sickness
• 22:50: KFC jellybeans announced
• 23:11: Pie eating contest and “Pigman” can’t participate
• 25:05: News anchor flubs and show’s old news bloopers
• 26:27: Shock videos—worker with hot steel
• 27:07: Bull set on fire; debate about bizarre international events

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Tone and Language

• Edgy, confrontational, and relentlessly irreverent.
• The hosts blend observational wit with dark and sometimes politically incorrect humor.
• Self-deprecating and often poking fun at each other, their families, and public figures.
• Conversation is fast-paced, tangential, and infused with pop culture references.

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Summary

This episode showcases Holmberg and crew’s ability to turn weird news into comic gold. From fantasizing about Brady’s pig-infused medical future and (deliberately offensive) musings on identity, to skewering a school’s apparent snakebite cover-up, the show mixes outlandish hypotheticals with sharp commentary and rapid-fire jokes. Even everyday topics—like product recalls, board games, or KFC snacks—are catalysts for their unfiltered takes. Fans of dark, freewheeling AM radio comedy will find plenty to laugh (and cringe) at.

Transcript

[Brady]

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[Brady]

All we gotta do now, we're back in the groove. Get through Tuesday and Wednesday, and then Thursday happens and football's back again. We go this Tuesday, Wednesday break is. It's accelerating my weeks. Get through the two. This is like the weekend almost. And then you get to the good stuff. Football being back is just. I'm like a dog with a tennis ball right now, just getting stuff done. Loving every second of it. Brady, about your pig kidney possibilities. Now that. That's a big news thing, says Trevor emails, and he says, the Lord is the alpha and omega. The Lord is the beginning and end. The Lord will create death to give Brady life. Pig kidneys for all. I agree with that. And then he said, now think of the best parts of having a pig kidney. We think about the benefits of Brady wanting pig inside of him his entire life and this cruel fate that we thought pig would be what kills him. But in a. In a weird plot twist, a pig will be what saves you. And the best part is your dreams will finally come true, that Muslims won't touch you ever again. It's over. The Muslim population that you've. That you've avoided your entire life because of the wrong gods.

[Brett]

Or would I be more of a threat?

[Brady]

Maybe you're a threat right now with your beliefs. Now, that's true. Now you're super pig.

[Brett]

Now they can't touch.

[Brady]

Now they can't even. Now they can't touch you. What? You've often said a world where a Muslim doesn't bump into me is a better world. And I'm like, yeah, I agree, Brady. That's nice. You shouldn't say that out loud.

[Brett]

Can't help it.

[Brady]

Every day I wish I was made of bacon to keep those muzzies away. I'm like, I don't think you can say that. But that's Brady talking, not me. I'm not. I don't mind. I just don't go near mosques and stuff just in case. So Ray fires over you Know how much crank that Flagon kid's gonna take in his life? I feel sorry for Flagin's anus. Yeah, I did too. I didn't say it to his dad, but I felt that way as well. Let me just say that is the mild ones that are coming. Oh, I'm sure Flaggin's not a name you want to give a kid. Flagan. I don't even know what that is, but it's too close to being just dreadful. Like the pretty good luck.

[Brett]

Flagan will only be in the circle said he can be comfortable with.

[Brady]

Oh, Flagan's going to be in circles, all right. Jerks. Lots of them.

[Brett]

Elite.

[Brady]

Yep. But back to you and the Muslims. I think them touching you has been a like you. It's been an avoid blessing. But now. No, no, no, no, I'm. You should get a shirt that just says Careful pig inside.

[Brett]

I'll get it. Like the intel inside logo.

[Brady]

I have the blood of a pig because it's technically filtered through a pig kidney when you get your pig kidney transplant. And that means you have the blood of the pig powered by swine. Oh, the Muslims will hate you. Powered by swine is solid. I like that. And you were. Before it was your caloric energy was powered by swine. Now your blood is literally to be filtered by pig parts. Brett, you're just gonna glow anti Muslim. This is great for you. Oh, my God. They're gonna aim planes directly at you. You're going to be the trade center of pig man says drone these pig organs. I'm making calls for you today. You can bring back Porkopolis instead of having a barbecue restaurant, though. It'll just be an urgent care. This is going to be. I can't wait. Anyway, it's time now for Pigman to give us. I'm rooting for this so bad. And they would waste a pig kidney on you, right? I mean, I know they're wasting. Well, I know they got to clear the cancer stuff, like you're free of it now, but they got to keep an eye on that for a while, make sure. Because I mean, this. This two pound ball of cancer that was living in you happened in under a year, essentially.

[Brett]

Well, we don't know that.

[Brady]

Well, yeah, you do, because you get checked. Your kidneys get checked every year.

[Brett]

But that was the first time. It's kind of inside.

[Brady]

That's what I'm saying. Yeah, that's what you're supposed to check with the kidneys is the inside. So it's been harvesting itself for A while. And it showed up fast. Yeah, when you think about it, if you're doing regular kidney checks, so they gotta keep an eye on the rest of you to make sure none of that blossoms before they start stuffing a kidney in you. But a pig kidney, it's like Doritos. There's tons of them. Jam one in there, you'll make more. Yeah, crunch all you want. We'll make more. I'm so excited for you and this new pig kidney idea. And isn't it great that it happens? And then the week after Brady gets his surgery, all the news is focused in on pig kidney transplants working. You don't even have to watch the news and root for kids to die anymore like you were doing. This is great. The anti Muslim white man kidney. It is awesome.

[Brett]

Jihad this.

[Brady]

Yeah, jihad my ass. And instead of intel inside, it just says pig inside. I want you to walk around. I bet you would, too. Mosques ask me about my pig kidney. They all run inside and start on their rugs.

[Brett]

You think he would have his Kovacs moment at a mosque.

[Brady]

Assalamu alaikum. This guy. Dude. Pigman. Everyone inside, it's Pigman. They start playing that dreadful music that they listen to Brady just outside. Half man, half pig. Please do this. It's time for the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our [e-mail] you can keep your pig organs in the shade nice and cool as the summer heat starts to wane a little bit. Even though we've got another month of the hot stuff, you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. And no, it's not a train. It's a glorious fall which awaits us. But it's still going to be 90 degrees for a while. And we jump into this a little early. But you put that shade in the backyard, you can drop your temperatures up to 15 to 20 degrees with all Pro Shade. Also, I learned this. You can control them from your phone. They have those options, too. Unreal. How much technology goes into putting shades up at your house? And you don't have to worry about them ripping off like in the olden days. And you don't have to worry about them looking like you've just built an ice cream shop in your backyard like old awnings used to look. These are fashionable. They look great. And the folks at All Pro Shade know what they're doing. Hop [e-mail] Brady reported.

[Brett]

Good Tuesday morning to you, Phoenix.

[Brady]

Hello, world.

[Brett]

Happy Teddy Bear day.

[Brady]

Ah, give my teddy A hug later today. Sorry, guys. I got a little gas.

[Brett]

For my mom. International Box Wine Day.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah, she's. She's celebrating.

[Brett]

I don't know.

[Brady]

Every day is international.

[Brett]

Yes, you're right. Yeah.

[Brady]

But again, poor wording. Is it International Box Wine Day or box wine? International.

[Brett]

International box.

[Brady]

So it's all boxes from. From other countries?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Or it's box wine across.

[Brett]

I don't think you can if you're. You're not celebrating. If you're getting something from Napa Valley.

[Brady]

Yeah, you don't. It's not regional, national or domestic Box Wine Day.

[Brett]

You want a good French box wine.

[Brady]

I think you're wrong. I just think it's bad English. But we'll go with what you say International Box Wine Day means it's all over the world, but because it's poorly written, you're supposed to get your imported box wines. That's your. The gallows are out right now.

[Brett]

Couple of basis fun facts. Johnny Knoxville was a stand in for Keanu Reeves during the filming of Bram Stoker's Dracula. And Johnny's real name is Philip John Clapp. He's born in Knoxville. Marvin Gardens on Monopoly. On the Monopoly board has always been misspelled. The actual neighborhood in New Jersey is spelled Marvel, but Monopoly did it M A R V I N. Parker Brothers apologized for the mistake in 1995.

[Brady]

They could change it. No one would notice.

[Brett]

Yep. It's also the only property on the board that's not located within Atlantic City.

[Brady]

Oh, it's just a suburb today.

[Brett]

Years old. When I learned that all of the locations are in Atlantic City.

[Brady]

You didn't know that?

[Brett]

Did not know that.

[Brady]

No kidding.

[Brett]

I thought it was like New York. Partly. In other places.

[Brady]

Boardwalk.

[Brett]

I understand.

[Brady]

I understand what it is. It's. I just always thought it was those Boardwalk, it's monopolies. Like just one part of it is played the game. You're just walking around Atlantic City is all you're doing. You didn't know that?

[Brett]

Nope.

[Brady]

Interesting.

[Brett]

Just 1.8% of Chinese women smoke tobacco. 44% of Chinese men, they don't call them cigarettes.

[Brady]

They smoke like piles of tobacco.

[Brett]

I think. Yeah. They have all sorts of different methods.

[Brady]

How many Chinese women chew?

[Brett]

1.8.

[Brady]

No, no. How many are named Chew? I'm sorry, I said that wrong again.

[Brett]

Bad English.

[Brady]

Sorry. Bad English. 1.8% bad English. Brady thought that was hysterical. Please be a pig man for the show. Stop laughing so hard. You're killing me over. For Christ's sake. If you were Pigman I would never leave your side. Listen to him laughing as this big tummy his pigtum. He's gonna pop.

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[Brady]

Doug Limu and I always tell you to customize your car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. But now we want you to feel it. Cue the emu music. Limu.

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[Brady]

Increase your wealth. Customize and save. We say that may have been too much feeling. Only pay for what you need@liberty mutual.com Liberty Liberty Liberty Liberty Savings. Very underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company affiliates. Excludes Massachusetts Holg's morning sickness. What if you got pig parts and you're like, this is great. I can't help it. It's happening. And your CPAP doesn't fit anymore because your snout points up. Now.

[Brett]

He has to turn it right now.

[Brady]

Ever since I put in those damn pig parts. Why? I'm furious.

[Brett]

Ears start pointing.

[Brady]

Kirby, did you do your homework? Hey man, back off.

[Brett]

I'm trying to get some.

[Brady]

Dad's mad again.

[Brett]

Man, you're not gonna believe this. My D is a curly, curly C.

[Brady]

Starts to spiral look. That's weird, man. You shouldn't be showing me that. I know, but it's funny like a duck. Why don't you show mom? She doesn't want to see it.

[Brett]

Never has.

[Brady]

Yeah, she doesn't know what the old one look like.

[Brett]

2025 is on track for the worst year ever in product recalls. Product recalls in the US have risen nearly 40% over the past five years. With 312 recalls already issued for the first seven months of 2025. Top hazards, fire, burns and heat related explosions. Mostly the battery stuff.

[Brady]

Oh geez, that's still going on.

[Brett]

Toys, accessories.

[Brady]

Horrifying. Yeah.

[Brett]

Choking or 6% dangers due to detachable faulty parts. 6% saying it. You're talking about losses for the companies between 10 million and 50 million.

[Brady]

Geez. Well, they should have a better gauge on how much they're losing. 10 to 50 millions are pretty. It's a pretty wide gauge.

[Brett]

Major recalls so far in 2025, millions of Bowflex dumbbells, expandable hoses, Shark Ninja pressure cookers, defective appliances that have been pulled after hundreds of injuries, including burns, broken bones, fingertip amputations.

[Brady]

Yikes. And fairness to Toledo's lack of Monopoly knowledge, Scott Haynes points out. Come on, give the guy a break. It's a family board game. Very true. That's true. You never really grew up with that. You and your mom playing Monopoly together probably didn't last long.

[Brett]

This is a two. Two person Monopoly.

[Brady]

Two person Monopoly is terribly boring. You've already got a Monopoly, right? You got a duopoly to start.

[Brett]

I got a couple of wild America stories.

[Brady]

I was just like. I would say, how about I just buy you out? Yeah. And Monopoly is also another thing where the most realistic thing about Monopoly is somebody's stealing. If you ever watch Monopoly with families, there's always a guy. My dad used to do it. He'd take from the bank and put some. We'd catch him like you're. You just took two 1 0s out of there. No, no, no, I passed go. No, you didn't. Not even close. No, that's mine. He would just steal. You're still on Indiana Avenue, pal. Yeah. What are you doing? You're by just parking. You haven't passed anything. Jerk. And he would always win. And I'm like, you steal? I accused me of stealing. God damn it. Like, I watched you do it. How dare you. Three hours we'd play. You ever play Monopoly with a family? Oh, you guys had to, like, make family game nights regular. Did you play Monopoly?

[Brett]

Yeah, Monopoly, Risk.

[Brady]

The family played Risk.

[Brett]

Wow. No, that was mostly with my friend.

[Brady]

I was gonna say the family gathered around with the Allies. And the Axis of Evil was probably not.

[Brett]

Cards were a big.

[Brady]

I want to be the axes of evil. All right, Brady's, Germany. Let's get on it.

[Brett]

Uno, euchre. Hearts. Car.

[Brady]

A lot of cars.

[Brett]

And spades.

[Brady]

Doing a lot of that. My grandpa used to do that. Like euchre in. That was like a big deal. Hello. My friends talked about it. I'm not sure I ever saw him playing. It was brought up a lot.

[Brett]

Misty Combs is a registered nurse, lives in Whitesburg, Kentucky. She saved the life of a baby raccoon. Oh, there's a couple raccoons in a dumpster gorging on fermented peaches. Got a little drunk. And there's enough liquid on the bottom of the dumpster that raccoon drowned.

[Brady]

Oh, My goodness.

[Brett]

She pulled it out.

[Brady]

What was she doing?

[Brett]

Cpr. Someone found the raccoon, brought it into.

[Brady]

She didn't go dumpster find a raccoon?

[Brett]

Yep.

[Brady]

All right.

[Brett]

The dumpster happened to be in the back of the Kentucky Mist Moonshine wow. Distillery.

[Brady]

It was gonna run into some alcohol.

[Brett]

And it did. And she applied the CPR and revived the raccoon.

[Brady]

No kidding. To terrorize more trash later. Good for her. Maybe parts will come out of that too. And Brady can be also like woodland creature man and Pigman all together. I think this is all good.

[Brett]

Got a four year old kid in Alexander County, North Carolina, was playing in the sandbox at recess at the daycare center he was at and got bit by a copperhead.

[Brady]

In the sandbox?

[Brett]

In the sandbox. Copperhead got under the fence.

[Brady]

Wow.

[Brett]

But the daycare worker at the time checked the hand and the fingers started to swell up. He thought it might be a splinter. They contacted the family.

[Brady]

Wait.

[Brett]

It's either a splinter or did he break his finger?

[Brady]

Time out. The kid was bitten by a snake and no one knew.

[Brett]

That's according to the school. Let's say the school should have lied. A guy at the school. There's a. Either the worker at the school killed the copperhead.

[Brady]

They're acting like less in that area. Gotcha.

[Brett]

And it was. And they said, oh, it's a broken finger or a splinter. Let's treat this. The kid's okay?

[Brady]

Sure.

[Brett]

But the parents came to pick up the kid and took him to the hospital. Like, why didn't you call 91 1?

[Brady]

Right. Just busted first. Right.

[Brett]

Even if it was a broken finger.

[Brady]

Did they suck out the poison?

[Brett]

No, he's.

[Brady]

They just. They just let him have it. How did they find out it was a copperhead?

[Brett]

They put the two and two together while the one guy you know killed the snake in the playground area.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

And then secondly, looking at going to the hospital and they figure it out. That's not a splinter. It's not broken.

[Brady]

I'm confused and I think you might be as well.

[Brett]

Okay.

[Brady]

The people at the school were lying when they said it was a splinter or a broken finger. They knew it.

[Brett]

They were trying to. They were trying to make an excuse why they didn't call nine.

[Brady]

Time out. Listen to what I'm saying.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

The people at the school are lying. They knew it was a snake the whole time. They didn't want the parents to think the kid got bit by a snake, so they made up a story that said he busted his finger. That's why they didn't call 91 1.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Or.

[Brett]

Or they just were the reason why.

[Brady]

They didn't call because why would you go looking for a snake afterwards?

[Brett]

Yeah. Unless you had some.

[Brady]

Yeah. That story is incomplete because the truth of the matter is that school's like, don't tell the parents and don't call 91 1. Just say you fell down.

[Brett]

Well, they're looking into the school now. They're going to invest.

[Brady]

So the kids said, later, I didn't fall. What happened? Flagging. I got bit by a snake in the sandbox and no one was paying attention to me. And when I told everybody, they flipped out. Flagging. Is that real? Huh? Then later they killed the snake with the shovel outside and put it in the trash and hit it. You can still find the snake in the trash. I'm dizzy. Oh, Flagon. And then they took Flag into the hospital. Like, oh, yeah, there's two little pokes here. He got bit by something. I told you guys. Can I have my lemonade now and maybe take a long nap? I feel weird. Yeah, you don't get dizzy and start hallucinating when you get a splinter. Flagon went home feeling a little bit off. The school is lying. Why am I the only one that sees things?

[Brett]

Oh, no, they saw it. They're just basically trying to lie.

[Brady]

Like, I'm talking. I'm not talking about them seeing it. I'm talking about us seeing the story. Like, that story is so terribly fake, fabricated by those school people to save their own asses.

[Brett]

And. And that is the maybe I didn't relay the point of the story. The parents were concerned. Like, why wouldn't you call 911 knowing.

[Brady]

That they were lying? They were covering their tracks. They don't like to think that they weren't seeing these bitten by rattlesnakes in the sandbox. What kind of operation are you running? You got rattlesnakes in your sandbox, Copperhead. All right, whatever. I don't care what it is. You got a snake in the sandbox and the kid gets bit by it. I'm not telling the parents. If I can get. If I can get away with that, I'm lying, too.

[Brett]

We don't have another school.

[Brady]

If I was babysitting Kirby and she's 17, I'd be giving her 100 bucks a week for the next 10 years to just say, shut up about that whole thing. But getting bit by a snake at my house.

[Brett]

His drive by, and he's, okay, I'll.

[Brady]

Pay for your rabies treatments. I'm sorry about that whole squirrel bite. Let's not tell your mom and dad though, right?

[Brett]

That's your wild America.

[Brady]

Well, that's crazy.

[Brett]

A new study found that music can help alleviate motion sickness. What kind the best music to relieve your car sickness. Great question, John.

[Brady]

Gonna.

[Brett]

Joyful pop music.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Happy Pharrell. Can't stop the feeling. Justin Timberlake. Shake it off.

[Brady]

She's gonna be in there.

[Brett]

It's a kuna matata. Was effective also from.

[Brady]

Well, it means no worries. That makes it so your tummy doesn't hurt when you're in the car.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

My friend Anthony. It helps that he is car sickness. And we'll just play hakuna matata. Morning sickness Medicate KUPD Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

We had a Ferris Bueller moment that happened in Miami. It's back in June. But they finally got the video and the kids in trouble. Here's a valet, Augusto Cesar Sadino Troz was parking a black Audi sedan and decided to take it for a little joyride. They captured it on video a couple months later. Hey, that didn't get parked immediately.

[Brady]

No, it did not go to a slot.

[Brett]

And KFC is releasing an official line of jelly beans which you won't be able to get until March of next year. Get their roll them out just before Easter. Each bag has three flavors. Fried chicken, sweet corn and gravy.

[Brady]

Those days are over for you, buddy.

[Brett]

And they must be rolling it out the news today because it's the colonel birthday.

[Brady]

Oh, it is. Oh, man. This was a big day for you back in the time.

[Brett]

You're asking one of us to get costume.

[Brady]

Get Brady's an inflatable kidney for the night of the singing Dead. Meathead just sent over an inflatable porky pig and said this has to. I think this is what you need to wear.

[Brett]

Attach a kidney to pork kidney?

[Brady]

Yeah, put a kidney on the back. Just hang kidney beans on his hand. Brady, your new laugh is killing me.

[Brett]

I can't help it.

[Brady]

Something's different. I love that daycares. Lie to the parents about a copperhead.

[Brett]

We're gonna be shut down if this comes out.

[Brady]

We're lose our jobs. Kill the snake. Bury it. Tell the kid he's got a splinter.

[Brett]

What are you doing?

[Brady]

Hi, guys. Yeah, what is it? Flagin. I got bit by a snake in the sandbox. No way. Yeah, he did. It's over here. Okay, don't tell him they've had to put him in it. They had to put him in a little room. I Want follow ups on this story? Because I had to put him in a little room and go. What are we gonna tell your parents? That I fell down and the teeter totter has splinters. And I got two of them right here and here. Okay, say it one more time, tell me again. I'm gonna play the part of your dad. Flagon. Hey, Flagon, how was your day at daycare? It's fine. What happened to your finger, buddy? I got bit by it. Nope, nope, nope. Start again. Flagan, we talked about this. Do you want my money? Yeah. All right, then you got to tell the story, right? How do you break your finger from a splinter? Flagon, just follow along. Don't outsmart the smart people, okay?

[Brett]

You're gonna be a problem. I got a couple of pretty videos.

[Brady]

Knock it stiff.

[Brett]

First one, I've got a replacement potential for the Brady Report. Do you have that one?

[Brady]

Huh? What replacement?

[Brett]

Yeah, the. The news one that I sent you.

[Brady]

That's the second one you sent me a potential.

[Brett]

First one is okay.

[Brady]

Oh, this is a girl who is going to replace you.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Is this the if. Oh, she's doing lotto numbers.

[Advertisement Voice]

The 54 year old suspect is still in the Dallas county jail this Evening with a 250,000. 250,000. I'm sorry. 250,000,000. A quarter of a million. I'm sorry, A quarter of a million.

[Brett]

It is.

[Advertisement Voice]

You the Peyton Jaeger.

[Brett]

She's a winner.

[Brady]

She's hot though. The difference between she get away with it. Yeah, she can do it.

[Advertisement Voice]

County jail this Evening with a 250,000. 250,000. I'm sorry. 250, hundred thousand a quarter.

[Brady]

This goes back to what Brady. All right, listen, this is Brady doing the exact Same story in 2019.

[Brett]

Total of $139,000. 283.16.

[Brady]

That's not a thing at all.

[Brett]

Total of $139,000. 283.16.

[Brady]

That's just numbers.

[Brett]

I don't want to wear a butt plug.

[Brady]

I'm sorry. I just had to play that one. Go ahead. What's next? A bull?

[Brett]

The bull. We could shoot the first one. I forgot about that one.

[Brady]

Okay, this guy working at a. Oh, no, it's one of those weird like conveyor belt roller belts. He's on the rollers. Hot steel. It's hot steel. Like Laffy Taffy. It just attacks him. Oh, it's shaped just like Laffy Taffy and it just melts that man. Oh my God, he's done. What's he doing? Where the hot steel goes. You're not supposed to get up there. Hank, it's coming down the track. I see it. Oh, geez. Anyway, again, Pigman survives.

[Brett]

And the last one is.

[Brady]

Toro.

[Brett]

And fuego.

[Brady]

He's on fire. The horns, all his horns are in flame. He's running around. A bad circus in the worst country ever. Is that a jail? Why is everyone behind bars? Yeah, they've lit the bull on fire and set him free in the crowd. Because this is evidently entertainment for horrible countries. Is this Mexico? Gotta be. This is only fun.

[Brett]

It looks like Mexico.

[Brady]

It has to be. Well, the way that everybody's in cages, it looks like Mexico. I agree with Brady.

[Brett]

Yeah, it feels like Mexico.

[Brady]

It has a Mexico type vibe, doesn't it? Yeah. No, he's right. It feels very much like la pinata on a Thursday. Just trying to get patrons in the door. Sorry, Brad. I don't mean to make you giggle. All right, Brett, what do you got? All right, we'll start off with this one here. Oh, my God. Somebody just said this. Somebody said. I just realized Pigman can't do the pie eating contest coming up here in a couple weeks. You're not allowed to do that this year.

[Brett]

What is the pie eating?

[Brady]

Storm draped pies every year coming up. You're like the judging. Yes. No, I'll get the clearance for that. You're not getting.

[Brett]

No, I won't. I won't do it.

[Brady]

Doctor is going to go. Sure. Eat as much pie as you'd like, pig man. Thanks, doc. You're not allowed to do it. He's right. Well, that's.

[Brett]

Shut your mouth.

[Brady]

No, you can't do storm drain pie eating anymore. Somebody else has to take it over.

[Brett]

Yep.

[Brady]

Pass it. Pass the torch. Don't say that to Kirby. Don't pass. Don't say that to Kirby. So yeah, man. Pass the torch. Give it to Kirby.

[Brett]

She'll do it.

[Brady]

She will eat the pie. Don't say that either. Let's just stay away from Kirby on this one.

[Brett]

I don't think they'll allow her to do it. Adult only.

[Brady]

Really gonna let Laser take this away from you, Laser? Can happen. Yet another cool thing in the neighborhood goes Laser's direction.

[Brett]

Son of a bitch.

[Brady]

We think Laser would do it.

[Brett]

Oh, yeah?

[Brady]

Does he go to the storm drain pie eating contest?

[Brett]

Yeah, he's been there.

[Brady]

Everybody has.

[Brett]

Not every time.

[Brady]

Everybody has to go.

[Brett]

He's got a pretty good attendance.

[Brady]

Oh, you keep track of that? Yeah, he didn't show up last year.

[Brett]

We do roll call.

[Brady]

Snot you got a little something hanging out of your nose there. Yeah, I'm sorry.

[Brett]

It's a new thing.

[Brady]

Can't contain it. All right, go ahead, Brett. I will start with this one. Asian girl putting on gray makeup on her cheek. Oh, she put balls on her cheek. Oh, that's hilarious. And another girl painted a penis on her cheek. And they put their heads together, and then one started sp. Spitting milk out. That's great. Good work.

[Brett]

We think it's milk.

[Brady]

That is such an inventive culture. Excellent work, ladies. That's fun. Here's E.T. hand. Yikes. Oh, God. It's a girl with a crab hand masturbating. Oh, God.

[Brett]

That's that news girl. That San Diego news woman.

[Brady]

Oh, she's all goofy. Oh, she's got huge. She's got two huge fingers. And like, E.T. she's masturbating with three T. I'll be right here. Idiot. Turn on your hard light her sand wherever you go.

[Brett]

Oh.

[Brady]

Oh, God. This is a. What the hell is that? It's Jeopardy. Something's gonna come out of that hole on the bottom. So this is an upside down vagina. Testicles. Oh, gross. Wait, Sarah, It's a urethra. There's a vibrator on what looks to be a scrotum, but under the scrotum is an escape hatch of some sort. And that thing's making milk.

[Brett]

I don't think he's got the. He lost his manhood twig anymore.

[Brady]

He's only got the berries. Right. I think this is in that medical hermaphrodite category where it's kind of all mixed up down there. The urethra's coming out of the taint. Am I right about that? I think so. I'm trying to figure it out, and then it just pukes. Brady, calm down. I like that Jeopardy's playing because nobody knows the answer to this Daily Double. And now it's time for the video Daily Double. And we'll end with this one. All right. It's a lady with a gigantic. Time to initiate this. Whoa, whoa. Sorry. Don't give the volume because I don't know. The lady sitting on a gigantic sex toy. And I mean, it's three and a half feet. This can't be happening. It's up to her heart. Yeah. Elephant foot. I don't know, Brady. They have babies. Those things are pretty resilient. Something came out. Big finish. How did that toy make. How did that toy. Little Debbie. That girl? I don't know.

[Brett]

That's. I love the grand finale. Yeah, well, I'm not getting a pig kidney.

[Brady]

Yeah, just don't go. Why do you want to live with these people? They're all around us. Oh, sweet Jesus. Oh, he's got that going on. There's kids named Flagon that are going to grow into adults. This is not a place for you anymore, Pigman. Oh, that was hilarious. And I don't know why I didn't expect all that mayo to come out. Why? I don't know where it came from.

[Brett]

She's holding it in.

[Brady]

Well, holding, I guess. She wasn't holding anything in.

[Brett]

No, she couldn't.

[Brady]

No, that garage. That door was open.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Brady]

She wasn't clinching a thing. It's a hangar at Sky Harbor. Yeah, you could put a Piper 181 in there. One of them garage doors that Tasha and the genie make. There you go. Everybody, I need a bag. I'm gonna go barf, but I'm gonna giggle while I do it. That is your Brady report. It's 98. It's out of control now.