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Sleeper is morning sickness. Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome. It's a Tuesday. Nine. Nine it is the morning sick. 545. My name is John Holmberg. There's Brady, there's Brett. There's big Dick Toledo. Let's get this thing off. And running. First by looking at Brett and saying, being a Bears fan has got to be difficult. I don't understand. It's got to be tough. Old Jer who used to work here is a big Bears fan. He text me last night and he just said, I just hate sports. I'm like, don't be a Bills fan. It's the third quarter. You're fine. He was right. It's time. As a Bears fan, it's just time to quit. That's just. It's. That had to be awful. Never quit. But, yeah, never get your hopes. No. Let's just go there. You got to have some sort of payoff. My first half feel great. I'm like, all right, here we go. They came out, second half, and I don't know what happened. The wheels just fell off. Caleb became the guy he was last year. It was like this inaccurate. They couldn't protect him. Fun game. Defense gas. The entire. Yeah. Then the defense. Yeah. Like they'd never played a snap. They were dead the first half. They're like, this is the freshest group ever. They're so fast, slowed down. Anyway, football's back. Week one is in the books. It was awesome. Except for. For Brett. People like you.
C
Toledo, too.
A
And Toledo did his seahaw. It was a pretty good game. They actually, you know, but actually it's Steelers, Seahawks this weekend. But do you hold it against a friend? Because Mangop was at the game yesterday. Chicago, him and his wife. So is he technically the mush? My friend Jim Wilson goes back every year for the home. So is he There he is, the mush. Okay.
C
All right.
A
Well, then between the two of them, you put Mangop and Wilson, our friends, back in that stadium. There's no chance any joy is going to happen. They're banned from soldiers. Yeah, they should go.
C
They should get them both together.
A
Go to Lambo next time.
C
Double whammy.
A
Yeah. Should have hooked those two up while they were there. Yeah. And then the Dodgers threw another no hitter for nine innings and then blew it, but ended up winning the game this time. I. I'm. I'm. It's a great. It's been. Sports. Been fun right now. It's just fun right now. It is. Well, I mean, for everybody. But make you miserable about it and you should be. But I mean, it's just flat fun. I. I enjoy it. Except for. I do, too. But I mean, being a Bears fan, you don't have much hope outside of training camp. You know, it's like, all right, co. Whatever. That's. That's the part like you guys get all mad and I'm just like, yeah, Bears, you know, whatever. Yeah. My fan base is mad that we haven't won one of our seven playoff games in the last nine years. Like, that's upsetting. Like, we want people fired. You guys just want to win a game or two. Yeah. If you could get to seven or eight wins. Wild happiness. Anyway. And that's just the way 49ers fans are going through it because their whole team got injured. Evidently, son, it's. It's just fun. Football's just fun. It's a better time. I'm lost in it all. You know what? I was I again, running errands, doing di. DIY projects, finishing up some stuff yesterday. So I was in the car and I turned on the game on XM had on the NFL Network on channel 88. They had the game, and it's Kevin Harland, the great Kevin Harland and Kurt Warner. So I go over to the hardware store at halftime. It was just about to close. Run in there, grab what I needed, pop back in the car, and I'm headed back. And Kevin Harlan comes back from commercial and says, kurt, has Brenda downloaded the new Westwood One app? And by the way, there's nothing better on watch. Look, take. I don't care what you listen to. Do whatever you want to do. When you Listen to Westwood One's broadcast of Monday Night Football, our own 98 KUPD. David Lee is the voice of Westwood One, the guy that goes 98 KUPD. Now, normally, as a voice person, I was always told to adjust your sound for the audience. David Lee would do, like, welcome to the Great Bake Off. Like, he doesn't like it could be Targeted to women. He does. He does the same thing. And I had never heard it. Like, you're listening to Westwood One's broadcast of Monday Night Football. And I'm like, wow, this is intense. With hall of Famer Kurt Warner and the voice of Monday Night Football, Westwood won the legendary Kevin Harland. And I'm like, are they gonna wrestle? Like, this is awesome football. I used to, like, years ago, used to always scream at us in the middle of it. Westwood One's production of My Monday Night Football, brought to you by Wrangler Jeans. Like, everything does is the same. So I'm listening to that. And then Kevin Harland says, has Brenda, Kurt's wife, has she downloaded the new Westwood One app? And. And Kurt said something like, you know what? I don't know. You know, I know she likes to listen to the broadcast, but she only likes to listen to you. She never likes to listen to me. She tells me so all the time at home. And then Kevin Harland says, my wife says, I talk too much at home, too. And they went on for like a minute about how much their wives hate them. Laughing. This is hilarious. Isn't it fun? And I just to myself with women broadcasters, if that was a two woman crew, how much uproar there would have been if one was like, well, my husband tells me to shut up every time I come home.
C
The coffee talk must stop.
A
Mine says the same thing. Says I talk too much and he just wishes I'd be quiet and go away.
C
You're right.
A
We'd be like, oh, my God, that's domestic violence. It's horrible. We as men have got to stop this. Well, she tells me. What? She tells me to be quiet. She didn't want anything to do with me. Women hate us. And we laugh about it. Like our wives, like, it's designed to be a joke for them to absolutely hate us. We gotta stop making that joke or women have to start doing it during WNBA games. And I know there's no husbands involved in WNBA games, but if there were.
C
That'S our way of dealing with it, though.
A
Humor. Yeah. And that's what Kurt said. I come home and she says, didn't you get all your words out at work? My wife just asked me to be quiet. She doesn't want. She's amazed that I still have words left coming home from work. And then I say something. She's like, I don't want to talk to you. She hates me, Kurt. Oh, my wife hates me too, Kevin. All right, back to the game. It is way too Common for dudes to talk about how miserable their home lives are with great big guffaws and laughs in the middle of it. Cause if you tried that WNBA broad Doris Burke. You know, when I went home last night, my wife, I mean husband took a swing at me. Anyway, it was fun because I had too much to say and he just doesn't like it. And the other one, whoever that would be mine too. I'm the same way. My husband wants to hit me every time I come home to it. He hates me. It's funny.
C
Eventually go to the sideline reporter and throw it out there a question ask people how they feel about this or how I should react.
A
Yeah, the sideline reporters are just ridiculously boring and stupid. I don't know when or why that started, but. Does your wife hate you? My wife can't stand me. It's amazing. I come home and she just puts her hand in my face and says, not now. And I haven't even started anything.
C
Maybe that's how the post game interviews will be on the player on the field. Great game.
A
How's your marriage? Not good. Wife won't want to hear about it when I get home. It's awesome. Wives hate us. And you know what? It starts with a weak dudes who. Who like, who won't stand up to them. It's that old man who. The happy wife, happy life thing, it's that gotta check in with the boss. Those guys that say stupid things like that, that allow this kind of thing, they allow this diminishing of self to be like, you know, I shouldn't. It shouldn't be funny to them that we go like guys go on the air and start saying she, you know, she doesn't want to hear anything I have to say. Because if you reverse it, it would be. It would be fairly sad. If a woman said that about my husband doesn't like when I talk at home. None of us like when you talk at home. By the way, you'd say a lot of nonsense.
C
Then on the other side of it though, the woman. I gotta check in with my. I gotta check right.
A
It's the sad. Are you okay? Blink twice like it's a hostage. If a woman says like, yeah, I don't know if I can go have drinks with you guys. I gotta ask my husband if everything's okay. Let me see if he's got anything scheduled for me. Like, oh, she's kept. We do it all the time. Let me check with the warden. Instead of just being humans, they make us this the Old ball and chain. Like, we've gotta stop this stuff again.
C
A ton of his humor.
A
Hey, we have to be humorous, funny.
C
When a woman says, I check with.
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My husband, Let me check with the guy who's got me strapped to the radiator. Because that's essentially with the ball and chains, heat straps into the radiator. And I'm not allowed to leave the house alone. Her friends wouldn't be laughing at Postino. They'd cry. They'd order more drinks. We had a good cry tonight at Postino. Lisa's husband straps her to the radiator and won't let her leave without permission. That's called domineering and awful. Like, you need to leave, girl. That conversation would start. And if you're a guy, you know, you say that like if Brett said, ah, I gotta check with Mathias. She doesn't let me out of the house much, and she hates when I talk be. You need to leave that. The guy would be like, hey, that's my wife. Like, we. We gotta stop. But especially Hall Em. And you listen to how they were introduced. Hall of fame football legend Kurt Warner and voice of Monday Night Football on Westwood One, the legendary Kevin Harlan. And the two of them just sat there and said, I'm not allowed to do anything. When I go home, I'm a piece of. These two guys have achieved so much that those women who are living off of them, there's no way. Brenda. Brenda, she's a nice lady, but Kir shouldn't be comfortable with that. And that shouldn't be so relatable that we auto automatically go to that Chris just like, well, it's cheaper to keep her at this point. You know, all them kids and everything, and 30 kids. Yeah. I mean, foundations. She runs those. She does a great job.
C
Keep the ship steady.
A
Why not say something like that? No. Brenda loves talking to me. It's awesome. We have a great relationship at home. And then Kevin Harlan could be like, not me. My wife hates me anyway. But we can say that. And it's funny. Women say it. And it would be tragic. There'd be stories on TMZ about. It would be hilarious, but so sad. But the differences. You get the guys. I'll go check with the warden. And then if the woman comes to do. I'm gonna go to Pastinos. Go, yeah, that's true. There's. That is true. They don't ever have to check with us Sunday afternoon. All right, we'll see you later. You want to do what for a card? No, Saturday Afternoon. Go ahead again. That's fun. Morning sickness medicate.
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Holg's morning sickness. So in a way, they just make it so we have to sit with them quietly. But if we decide to do something fun, they try to put a stop to it. We're all for them going out, having a good time. Yeah. You guys, you want to do what? First of all, yeah, go nuts. Have fun. Take a weekend. Go with your friends for a weekend. Are you going to miss me? Oh, of course, yes. Be terrified.
C
And that's always the answers.
A
Yeah, well, of course. Yes, of course I'm going to miss you. Meanwhile, you're texting the boys. All right, man. What are you. Oh, even Dale will text. Just dropped the wife off at the airport, and that's like code for all of us to go, all right. We can do stuff with. We're allowed to do things with Dale without him getting nervous. Dale told me that if he ever said the C word in front of his wife, even if it was driving and mad at another driver in some sort of road rage, he said. I said, how? What would happen? He goes, probably wouldn't talk for two weeks. Two weeks. Jesus. You can't say the C word, man.
C
Say it more often.
A
Yeah, exactly. That's what I said. I would constantly be spewing that. The. The fun part about it is, is the, like, he's in some sort of North Korea type language situation with his wife. She doesn't like cussing, and Dale loves to cuss, and I think he's abused that in an earlier time.
C
But she has to know that they know she's.
A
It's not allowed. Like, she won. She won that fight. Talk to Dale about, like, around her.
C
I want no cuss.
A
Oh, yeah. But he lets it out. He spews it, and then he thinks that all women are that way. So like the cart girl at Mesa Country Club. And just by saying Mesa Country Club, you're kind of saying, The C word. And I said the C word out loud in front of the cart girl. And I thought Dale was gonna lose his mind. And he kept going. It's a country club. I'm like, you keep saying it too. No, I'm not. I'm like, yeah. And that word there, I'm like. It's not that offensive because it's part of real good words. They don't add the F word and then an ROI and act like that's normal. So it can't be that offensive if other words have country music. I mean, that's. You know, you're basically kind of having at the fun of it all. It's great. Like Jack Cittarel. They're running for governor. I mean, that's. How offensive could it be?
C
Wonder how the campaign's going.
A
I hope it's going really well. I'll check in on the Shitarelli campaign later. The. The better part of. Of yesterday was again, husband to the rescue. Ex husband. The lady that was in the Coldplay camera thing. Yeah, her hus. Her ex. Her estranged. They call him her estranged husband. Said, she wasn't cheating on me. We're separated. She's allowed to do whatever she wants. He stepped up to her because I bet you she's been going through hell, like, with people because they kept king. The che. The cheating couple, the CEO and his. You know, and all that. Now she's still not great if he's married and stuff, but maybe that's what I kept saying about that.
C
If one's involved. If one's involved, like the CEOs married.
A
Oh, she's still.
C
The other one is not married. That's still cheating on both people.
A
Huh?
C
The lady is cheating with a married man.
A
Oh, yeah. No, she's. Yeah, she's not doing. She's not cheating. She's just stepping in where she's. She doesn't belong. Shouldn't be around. My. My theory with that is when people got all over that dude lost his job and everything else, and that was because he was trying to bang the HR lady. That's a different story altogether.
C
And he was taking advantage of.
A
We did not know their situation. We did not know their situation. We don't know if both of them are going through horrible separations at home. We don't. I just had a friend of mine tell me a little while ago, and I've been out with these people a couple of times. Times that he's been living separately from his wife for the last year. And they're. And they're like, they're gonna call it quits. And I'm like, we've been like, you've. We've been with you. And he said, yeah, I know. Putting on a face, you know, keeping up appearances and like, how about that? Well, good job. You don't know. People's home situations to get stuck on the Coldplay cam and have the whole world hate you. And the lady's like, I don't know. Know. I mean, we're both separated. We're both going through some times. I had a friend who lived with his. You did, too. That lady. That lady lived with her ex husband for three years after they kind of said, we're done. Which made it really awkward for dates. Why? The money. Just. It was tougher to split up everything. And you know that all this bought.
C
A house that you're in, basically.
A
Yeah.
C
So deep that you can't sell it.
A
They were both stuck. And it's like, look, we. You know, can we make this work, work without one of us having to spend more money to live somewhere else? And they're like, sure. So I lived on opposite ends of the houses. Put a tape line in the middle of the house, kinda. Yeah.
C
Yeah.
A
Three years. Oh, man. Yeah. I can't imagine. I. It would be pretty brutal to go back to that guest room every night. Go. All right. See you later, pal. And I got a date tomorrow. Is it right if I make that thing moan and groan in the guest room, or is that going to be a problem? Get a room. All right. Right. Leave the sock on the doorknob if you're here with somebody. I gotta put up a sock on the doorknob. My wife might come in. What the. She lives here. It's okay. I don't understand why you took me here. Oh, we're separated. We just are. We just can't move out.
C
I know a situation where they're both seeing other people or actually been together for years with the other people, but they're not divorced. Too much stuff to try to just. We're not going to address that.
A
People do that. Our buddy from another planet had a wife. Wife back home for, like, 14 years. He never talked to her. Yeah. Pain in the ass. She's got money coming and going. I got money coming and going. It's a pain in the ass to get that whole thing done. I gotta fly back. I don't. I'm not doing it. So he finally had to, because he met someone that he wanted to be with, and she was like, kind of saying, could you Please get divorced. Finally, he's like, what's the difference? It is weird. But, yeah, people do that. So that, that those people. Those. And I felt bad for them. After a little while, I'm like, all right. Even if this was just a couple people stepping out, they certainly didn't deserve the ire of all of the public. And it was our job to, you know, scream and yell at them what we think. Of course it's not good. But the lady's ex husband came out and said, look, he had to love every second of this. Oh, this bitch been banging her boss for a while and everybody's gonna get fired. I'm gonna sit quietly for. She had to beg him, please say that we separate. Go public, please. No one believes me. I don't know. I'll think about it. And like a month and a half later, he's like, man, we've been separated. She's fine. Took him a few minutes to do. I mean, Jesus. Oh, yeah. He waited and, you know, I'm sure he said, she's still a. I mean, she's banging her boss. And that's disgusting. You don't bang your boss. That's weird. But yeah, she's a whore. And that's why we're getting a divorce. But she was. She wasn't. As far as I know, she wasn't horn around that night. I mean, unless he's married, then she's just a, you know, a number two whore. That's it.
C
He stand up. So it can be a very amicable split. Split without.
A
And maybe he turned to a girl. Well, maybe this means that the house is mine. Fine. Since you decided to go off and be a public whore. Come on. It's not fair. I should get half. I don't know. Maybe we should renegotiate this whole thing and let's arbitrary come out and say something because this is fairly embarrassing. Yeah, I could make this worse. Oh, my God. I would use that leverage like nobody's, but I could probably. I mean, you're banging the CEO of a company. It's like you got, you know, you're tracking your job tracks nicely. It doesn't look like you're going to need a new gig anytime you can bang CEOs, so I think I'm gonna take some off the table here. I think we're gonna go back to the drawing board on this divorce. I should get half. No, I think maybe I'm gonna keep the house. I'll give you four or five hundred dollars a month. How's that Sound or I'm gonna go out publicly and go, I can't believe she did this to me. It's up to you. Pretty great. Well, other news that I was seeing and everybody's emailing me about this, you see that they have mastered the pig kidney transplant, Brady. Oh, yeah, They've mastered the pig. Which begs one question. What flavor sauce would you pour on yours?
C
Well, they've had it down. There was a. There's a documentary that came out about earlier this year. Sanjay Gupta.
A
Yeah.
C
It's on.
A
Don't say a racist like that. Yeah. Jeez.
C
There's two facilities that basically breed these pigs.
A
Sure. Harvest organization pigs.
C
Yeah. And they are genetically tied in with the human genes. Put them in there. It's pretty amazing. But the. There's one person that is still one that I know of that still has it. The other one, it went in for about a year and a half and then it. They just like, let's pull it out. It started rejecting.
A
Sure. That can happen with real.
C
Now. They. It's pretty much. Yeah. And the doctor also says, I believe within five years we'll be able to 3D print.
A
Yeah.
C
Me heart.
A
This dude got his new pig kidney yesterday, and he's up and it went well and he's feeling good and that's great. And you didn't answer the question. What flavor sauce would you pour on yourself? Cuz you're going to go digging around for that thing. There's no question about it. You can't have pork inside Brady like that. It goes in his belly. It doesn't go in his back. So do you get a heart and.
C
A side of bacon, too?
A
I mean. I mean, Brady's heart would be like, what, we putting pig parts in here now? All right, this is too much. The man loves pork too much. Listen, I thought we were. You would literally become a walk. Porkopolis vessel. Your nickname would have to be Porkopolis if you had pig parts. I think you having pig parts is the best. Look, start looking into this. I'm sure it's kind of free. If you're willing to be a guy who says, I'll take pig parts.
C
Well, there is still a waiting list on it, but you can.
A
You're a celebrity. Make a call and say, how about the pig parts for me? Get in on this. Don't sit around and what? Don't be passive about this. This. Make a few phone calls all day long about pig parts. Brady agent.
C
So yesterday I had a meeting with the oncologist and everything. And basically the Testing the pathology on the cancer. I'm more or less cancer.
A
You're cancer free. Ring the bell, Brady. Ring the bell. I'm happy for you. The cancer free think's a big deal.
C
I go, so the. The kidney was large. He's like huge. Tell me how large it was. I'm thinking because I jokingly said he pulled a brisket out. He goes, yeah, your kidney. And I'll show you the hand size. That's probably about a seven to ten pound brisket.
A
Seven. Oh, if it was a brisket, it's not. Yeah, yeah. Morning sickness. Holmberg's morning sickness.
C
But he says the size of it.
A
Huge.
C
Yeah.
A
You're holding your hands about a foot apart. Part.
C
Yeah.
A
Your kidney.
C
How did I go? How about my other one? Is that. He goes, it's enlarged too. I mean it's got disease on it.
A
Yeah.
C
But the good. You know, he goes, the last labs that I had, the left is working.
A
A little bit better.
C
It's going. It's going in the right direction.
A
It's never going to go all the way up.
C
No, it won't. It will go down eventually.
A
Which is where we get into pig parts.
C
But having. Getting the cancer removed. This is the thing that I didn't know. He goes, you won't be able. They won't put a kidney in until.
A
You'Re probably two years. Yeah. Because I gotta make sure. But a pig kidney, who cares?
C
I wonder if that's. I wonder if that speeds up.
A
They're not taking dead teenager kidney and putting it in you. They're put that in a viable living vessel. That's not going to ruin it. Pig kidney. We'll just make more. Yeah.
C
Okay.
A
We chop those up and eat them like crazy. Let's start using. I mean, how many pig kidneys are there if we can both eat and use their organs for you. Pig kidneys, man, that's your future. You've been. Think about it. It's your. It's. It's your story arc. I'm in. You've been trying to put pork inside you for your whole life as some sort of strange quest.
C
It's in. It's been in the family for years.
A
You're basically Richard Dreyfus from Close Encounters. You keep making. Taking pig parts to put in your body over. You're addicted to it. It's like when he carved out the devil's mountain with the mashed potatoes. It's an obsession now.
C
My goal is to be unbotched. I've got over too many.
A
Pig part. Yeah. I think that's a good idea. And I think if anybody needs a pig part inside of them, helping them live, it's you. That's your final step. Like it's a video game. It's the last level. Like he's get. Once he gets pig parts, his quest will be complete. To be half man, half pig. I am thrilled. The idea that Brady started a restaurant called Porkopolis. If bacon was in the room, he's touching it. You were addicted to pork. Let's put some in you and help it. Now it can actually. Pork can be your literal blood filter. Think of this. Why are you. Why do you even want a person's kidney? And then because a lot of the times those organ donors say that they pick up on some of the stuff that their. The dead donor gave him. Like, you know that Phillies fan story I always tell and I've been to those donor charity events. Now you can start having what the pig thinks about slop rolling around in the mud and stuff. You can start living the life you've always wanted to live. Those people that walk around pretending to be Pekines or they think they're ponies for a little while you can actually say, I'm not only thinking it, I am part of pig. It is time, Brady free. Brett, will you be his agent? Make a few phone calls. You know a guy, don't you? Let's get Brady a pig part.
C
Can I request a truffle pig? At least I could make some big money finding.
A
Yeah, if you want. I don't know if truffle pigs and our organs match the same way just regular pigs do. But you know what? Now you're getting picky with your pigs. Now you're getting a little bougie. Those are high end pigs.
C
They're bougie pigs to begin with, right?
A
We're not going to waste their organs on you. We're just going to get one of those. You're getting farm pig organs. Knocking it off. Start slow, Brady. If they show up with truffle pigs or magical, you know, royal kingdom pigs. But yeah, this guy's 54, he's New Hampshire, he's doing well. His surgery in June, he's like, look, I wanted to. This is what he said. I was asked about it and wanted to contribute to the science of it. He's an athletic trainer from Dover, New Hampshire. He said not only milestone of a pig kidney being inside of me, it keeps you off dialysis. Another guy did it. 130 days, no dialysis. Pig kidneys Working. And all they did was volunteer. Get on that list today, immediately. Are you texting someone about pig kidneys?
C
There was a lady in New York that. In that documentary because they had that guy not from New Hampshire, but the.
A
The other dude. Yeah, Tim.
C
And he's been, I think the longest still.
A
Oh, he's a New Hampshire guy too. And he was. Yeah, he's the. He got off dialysis. Pig kidneys, Brady, that's your future. Do you want pig inside you? When have you ever said no to that?
C
I haven't.
A
You haven't. And you wouldn't. And now you're not allowed to eat it.
C
I'm saying no right now.
A
Huh?
C
I can't have pork. Really?
A
Well, this way you can. This way you can. This is like a guy with Ed figuring out how to make himself, you know, through his prostate. You found a new way to put it in you. They're not allowed to eat pork anymore. They took it away way. But you can become one. Join the pig force, Brady. Why, Brett? Why? Get it. What animal would you want inside you? Rico Blaze, answer again. No. Which animal would you want inside you? I know Brady's is definitely pig.
C
A bull.
A
You want a bull in? Yeah, why not like a lesbian or like a. No, no, like a real bull.
C
Bowl. Of what? Pasta?
A
No, no, not bowl. And see here we still think. There we go. I wouldn't go that big. Let's see. And dumb. Like that's a dumb animal. I'd want a smart one. I think like a dolphin. Piss off all the right people at PETA. And then I think they've got to have organs. We can. Why?
C
Very smart.
A
They are smart. That's true. But do they even have organs? I don't think they're organized based. I think they're octopus. Do they have kidneys? I don't think they've got kidneys.
C
I don't. I don't think they have.
A
I don't think they have organs. They might have a heart. Something to filter hearts of muscle. I don't think they've got. I don't think they've got what we need. You see all them jerks getting run over and the running of the bulls and everything else. Getting stabbed and everything. They're tough. There's no doubt. A new version that support dumb. Another bull killing a Mexican guy in his front yard. Yeah, I'm sure we'll see that. Yeah, I'd want something smart. I think like a dolphin. I don't know why we're not harvesting dolphins more. It's because of that documentary the COVID They scream when you kill them and.
C
Then when they were training them just go after land or the. In the water for the mines.
A
Oh yeah. They were good at that. Blew a few up.
C
There's a one way trip.
A
Yeah.
C
Couldn't even get a good boy.
A
Yeah. They didn't even know that.
C
Thank you.
A
They trained really well. They got a lot of good boys. When the. But when the live. Live arms were on they blew up dolphins. But dolphins are mammals so they've got to have something inside of them that we can use. I don't know if they've got kidneys either. I would imagine they do. They're mammals.
C
People could use their brain.
A
90 of society could use a dolphin brain. 90% of them, that's for sure. Well, I'm excited for you Brady. The science is going to look into it more. I think it's fantastic. He's just absolutely great that pig. Kidneys are like. Then they have the thing where if you're. I didn't know this but if you're murdered your organs like sometimes you're. If you're an organ donor, you're murder. You can't do it. Why? I don't know. That's. I was reading the other day. Organ donor was murdered and they had to use his. His organs had like they. He might have been. I don't know. Poisoned them or something. I don't know but it was like they said something about murder victim. I don't know how. How far it goes down. Like if you're just struck in the head, your heart and lungs are still good. But they said something about not being able to use your organs or they don't want to to if you're murdered. Which means it transfers all that fear into you I guess too. And speaking of murder. They caught the guy over by this the killer by my rental house.
C
Where was he?
A
I didn't see where he was. But they busted him. And they busted him because evidently the story comes. It gets better. These are nice condos.
C
And he was the guy was he living with.
A
Yeah.
C
Yeah.
A
He ended up staying with the dude for two months. You know how. Then again. Don't do this. I don't care how much you think Jesus loves you for this. Your church homeless outreach program. Never let them in. Never ever let them in. Take them to lunch, give them a few bucks. That's what the shelter in the church is supposed to be for. If the church won't let them sleep at the church. You don't let Them sleep in your house. End of story. Dude stayed there for two months. In the last few weeks, he was asking everybody over at the church, how do I get them out? And the church people were like, why, my son? You should help. No, no, no. He's crazy. I think he's going to kill me.
C
Be patient.
A
Be patient. You're helping another of Jesus's flock. And like, no, Your reward awaits. And then he probably said, did you ever watch man in a Van? The whole thing was based on a dude who worked at a church. The church is the bad thing here. We're trying to help them. This one's trying to kill me. You have to help. Talk to him. If that's part of the plan. Like, no, I don't want it to be part of the plan. I want the plan to change. Change? God's plan is for you to be murdered by the homeless man you put in your house? Nope, nope, don't let them in. Like Brett says, couple granola bars. Keep an eye on them. That's nice. Don't show them. Homeless people are a lot like, here's the bedroom.
C
Here's the gun cabinet.
A
Yeah, yeah. Here. I keep all those knives. Remember, I told you collected knives? No lock on those. Anyway, down here's where my big stick collection is. There's the medicine cabinet right there for all the drugs you need. Here's where I keep my strychnine and my bleach. If you want any of that, it's right here. Not lockdown.
C
Couple of empty barrels.
A
These are nice condos. That's like, a nice spot. 68th Street, McDowell. These big new condos that they built a couple years ago. They're super sweet. You don't take in. Homeless people are a lot like that. Like a. Like a friend with benefits. You don't show them where you live. You don't feed the cat. They don't go away. Like, the guys who say that about girls are like, I'm not serious about her. I'm not gonna feed. Feed her. Like, the second she starts asking for dinners and stuff, this is over. Because once you feed them, they don't go away. Same with the homeless. Once you start.
C
Once they start off your toothbrush.
A
Yeah, once. Once you hear the beeps of your microwave and it's a homeless guy. He ain't going anywhere. He's figured out the microwave. Made himself right at home. Yeah, he's got. He's got Hot Pockets and Stouffer's lasagna now. And you think it's going to be easy to get him out. You're crazy. I don't care what your pastor says. Says get him out and do it in a mean way.
C
Yeah, it sounds like the program. The guy was like, one of us.
A
Has to leave, right? Morning sickness. 98. Can you PD Holmberg's morning sickness? Well, the other thing was he spent 18 months in jail for dismembering his roommate's dog a few years ago. This is not a dude that the church did.
C
You know, the, that the guy.
A
The church should know it. They should do background checks before they go to their outreach program and start stuffing them into their parishioners homes. I, look, I, I, I respect not, not really, but I do sort of understand your whole Jesus is watching me thing, and you feel like you got to live a good life and all that. You don't need to do this. Megan's dad did this with homeless people for the longest time. He brought him in. No, but he would sit and hang out with him at places and give him money and get to know him. I think he would bring him in if it wasn't for Megan's mom. And he said, it's like, what if he. And this was an argument I got into with a lady who used to work here, and she started to hand this guy money. At the end, he was a just. And then he started to hang around her like he found her at the Circle K. And like, he'd follow around like, yeah, you fed the cat. And she goes, but what if it's Jesus? I'm like, what if. Who's Jesus? She goes, what if that's Jesus testing me? I'm like, what kind of test is that? Are you, you're a good person. You don't need this test. Like, was he testing you until you got your limits? And then you finally tell this guy to off? That's what you do.
C
And Jesus, for the most part, wandered around with a posse. He's got his troop with him.
A
He's sort of homeless. And the other thing, I went on that ride along years ago, and I discovered, I knew I found something out. And I don't think you want this reputation. There are shelters all over the place that will help, help these people. And I went out with the cop that I was with, and we were handing out the shelter numbers and cards, and the cop would say, I'll be your advocate. Or you can get somebody, you know, to be your advocate. Do you want help? And they'd be like, nope, they're perfectly fine doing whatever it is they're doing. And I also found out that when the normal people were chatting them up on the reg, the cops think it's gay sex. And I'm like, why? And he goes, because a lot of times these dudes living these lives, these country club lives go and let homeless people blow them for 20 bucks. Yeah. And because they're not getting anything at home and whatever, and they have this little pension for boys, and so they'll go out and find a guy. And now it's not the case all the time, but that's what they think is going on. And we saw a homeless guy talking to this dude and who had this big King's Ranch Ford. It was a beautiful truck. It's like $100,000 truck. He had his work clothes. He was Button up. He was. He owned a company. And he's talking to this homeless guy. And we pulled over, and he's like, all right, I need to break this up. He goes, what are you doing here? He goes, oh, I just. I come by and help this guy out. Well, I noticed in the homeless guy's hand there were 40 bucks. And he just was trying to put it in his pocket, but he couldn't find his dirty, dirty pocket. And the guy talking to him was like, I'm just here to help him. I run into him all the time. Time. And the cop I was with going, you need to get out of here. Do you want to be his advocate and take him down to the shelter? That's fine, but you need to get out. Here's a card. You can help this guy better by not giving him money and getting him into a safe place. And he goes, oh, I don't want anybody to know. I don't want this to be a thing. And he's like, all right, well, then get out of here. And we got back in the car, and he goes, watch this. My cop buddy goes, watch this. And we drove around the block, pretty big block, and went back, and he goes, he's going to be there again. He. He gave him his 40 bucks. And the cops saw it, too. He goes, I know. We gave him the 40 bucks. The deal's been made. And he said, so he's coming back for that bj. And I'm like, you're out of your mind. Yeah, I said, you're out of your mind. That's not going on. And sure enough, we came around the corner and that truck was there, and that guy was standing there with him again. He goes, I think I told you to get out of Here. Well, we hadn't finished our. Yeah, you need to go. So I'm gonna. You're going to jail. Do you want that? Because deep. Because he's seen it so much. He's like. And you could see that dude's hamster in his head spin. Oh, my God. If I go to jail, my wife's gonna know. She knows. No, he just jetted out of there. He wasn't helping a homeless guy. He was up to no good. He was either buying drugs or getting a bead. And it was clear he was getting a beach west side Coldplay concert right there. So don't let homeless people, 40, free.
C
And clear that night.
A
Don't let them in your lives. Help them find help, but don't let them into your house. House. It results in. It's. I've never, ever once heard somebody say, let this homeless guy stay at my place for a couple months. Man, that worked out great. He's doing some yard work. He cleaned himself up. He's got a gig. He's paying half the bills. I've never heard that story ever, once. Now I have heard homeless people.
C
That's the first time I've heard of that pro. That program that you're talking about.
A
It wasn't a program. They met through the homeless outreach, and the dude talked him into living with him. The church. Like, you should do this. This like the guy who dismembered his roommate's dogs? Yeah. You should let him. Give him a second chance. That whole second chance thing, the church that leads to your bloody murder. Yeah. You don't let people in your house ever. Ever. It's like those dudes that go door to door constantly knocking on your door about your roof. That seems to be a trend that's getting a little out of hand. Or solar. Oh, the solar guys aren't as much. The roof guys are. I get solar, but my roof guys are starting to get a little bit too much. There's an awful lot of them out there. There's like 6 million roofing companies. They knock on your door every single day, leaving cards, leaving litter.
C
Brutal storms.
A
Yeah.
C
Past couple of weeks.
A
Seems to me like letting one of those guys live with you for a few days would be a bad idea. I don't even open my door to talk to them at the door, let alone have them over for two months.
C
It's fine, John. I've been meeting with a roofer once a week.
A
You love it. And you would let him in? You. You would. This is something like you would have done. I Don't know that even Brady would let a homeless guy live with him for two months because he's still deep down. Country club Brady. He's bougie. They're gross. Like facilities. There's. Somebody else will take care of this. I'll help you.
C
I'll steer you in that right direction.
A
Then we're done here. Yeah, but you don't let him live there for two months. This poor guy got bludgeoned all over the. And then the details came out. Evidently his whole condo is just a bloody mess. Broke his neck, broke his ribs, stabbed him a bunch, budded him up, and he was living there again. He tried to take microwave privileges away from a dude who didn't have anything. You just don't. That's the. That's the sign that you're about to die. Once you hear that in your house and you're like, hey, what you making in there? Lean pockets? That. That he's not going anywhere. You give a homeless lean pocket pockets and teach him to use the microwave if in fact you have a guy there long enough where he just knows which popcorn reheat the singular buttons. Oh, it's his house. It's his house. Never in my life as life got better when I let that homeless guy start living with us. It's never been said. No one ever, ever, ever, ever. There's programs for isn't. And by the way, also, it isn't Jesus. If Jesus is testing you that way, he's being a jury jerk. Stop it. Get them help. Give them some food. But not in your own home. Never show a homeless person where you live because. What? Like, they'll see your stuff. This is nice. I've never been on a couch like this in a while. You give them a shower, you start. That's not right. They're human beings. They can figure it out. Just give them a leg up. Not a house to stay in. Or what happens? He get iced by him and that's it. Then he goes on the lamb. He doesn't care. And now he's got a permanent home right there in that jail he doesn't have to worry about. He's got three hots in a cod forever now. His life got better. He got arrested. That might have been the whole plan to tell you. The whole plan all along is to. Well, if I get a life sentence and I never have to worry about being on the streets anymore, terrible idea. What if we left learned Brady needs to be half man, half pig. And the homeless need to stay away from your front Doors.
C
Oh, two good lessons.
A
Yeah. What would you do if a homeless was, like, banging on your front door? Would you say, what if that's Jesus? Or would you call the cops? You say that. I call the cops. You don't invite a man and give him a place to. I'll answer the door anyway. I know it sounds cold. And somebody will email me and say, oh, I was homeless. And if it wasn't for somebody giving me a chance. But usually that's someone you know, new. If it's a brand new person from church. Oh, bad news. Bad news. They're gonna take. Take advantage of your kindness. You know, you never do that. You'd never have them come in here. Hey, guys. What's up? Hey, Tripp. How are you? You know, good. I let a homeless guy live with me for a little. We'd say you're crazy. Like, immediate. Yeah, things are getting real nice around there. He cleans the kitchen. And he's. He's great with, you know that. He sleeps in the same bed, though. I mean, that gets a little awkward. For once you believe what he does. My life is exponentially. But, oh, the blow job. Yeah, he lost his teeth a long time ago from excessive drug use. And I'm telling you what, I've had a couple wives in my life. Never like this anyway. Yeah, life got a lot better since I let a homeless live with me. Nope, not a thing. I hate to be a jerk about it, but I'm also a realist, and sometimes realists sound like jerks. Can't do it and email me. We let a homeless guy live with us for three months. It was the best time our kids have ever had. Nope, nope, nope. Never happened. Always ends with he killed someone. Someone. He stole something. He ruined our house. That. You can give me one story. I can give you a million. Bad for your one good one.
C
It's a dark what about Bob?
A
And that was a stalker story of a deranged mental patient chasing a doctor. And what did the doctor do? Keep him out of our house. Yeah, don't do it. I was close. There was that sexy, hot homeless that lived up there at Circle Cave for a little while, and it was like Larry and I were doing drive. We do drive bys for, like, I can't believe this. She's pulling the wool over all our eyes. And we were trying to talk Larry into dating her. That would have ended with his murder. Oh, he'd have moved her in. Oh, in a heartbeat. And then he would have been slaughtered by her street pimp. And all of his cool stuff in his house, computers and things would have been stolen. And it never ends good. Anyway, that's the life lesson for the morning. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? 585-9800. A good one for Brady's new pig kidney. It's 98KV. Wake up. It's out of control now. 98KUPD.
In this September 9, 2025 episode of Arizona’s #1 Morning Radio Show, John Holmberg and co-hosts Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo serve up their trademark blend of sharp humor, commentary on relationships, sports, science news, and human nature. Major topics include the societal double standard in how wives are allowed to rib husbands (but not vice versa), advances in pig-to-human organ transplants, dramatic personal medical updates, and the dangers of inviting the homeless into your home. As usual, the hosts riff on relatable stories, dig for comic gold, and extract uncomfortable truths about modern life.
[00:41 – 03:30]
[03:30 – 11:49]
[13:59 – 18:35]
[19:46 – 26:44]
[29:57 – 42:00]
On Marital Double Standards
On Brady’s Health & Pig Kidney Science
On Helping the Homeless
On Social Judgment & Privacy
The show’s tone is irreverent, candid, and playfully combative—with an undercurrent of genuine concern for human behavior and social issues. The crew employs sarcasm and gallows humor to broach tough topics, revealing uncomfortable truths about relationships, health, and society’s blind spots.