Holmberg's Morning Sickness - 09-11-25

Episode Theme:
This episode takes a humorous and personal turn as John Holmberg and the crew discuss the overlap of national tragedy and personal milestones—specifically, the anniversaries of Bret and Toledo’s divorces, which both fell on September 11. The conversation weaves together tongue-in-cheek divorce banter, drinking rituals, and John’s experience with new health treatments that appear to be causing his feet to grow. The hosts riff off each other in classic HMS irreverent style, blending personal stories with pop culture and plenty of laughs.

1. Anniversaries of Divorce – Finding Levity on 9/11

Key Discussion Points

• John brings up that September 11 is not only a day of remembrance but also a personal milestone for both Bret and Toledo, marking the anniversaries of their divorces.
• The conversation highlights how personal happiness can sometimes coincide with nationally somber days, and the unique way people carry on with their lives.

Memorable Moments & Quotes

• [02:13] John:
  “Both of their divorces finalized on September 11th.”
• [03:03] Brett:
  “Oh man. Absolutely. Huge fan of divorce.”

Additional Details

• The guys delve into how each actually celebrates their “divorce-versary.”
  • [03:08] Host:
    “I’ll be doing a few shots this evening.”
  • Discussions on whether certain liqueurs (Sambuca, Malört) are appropriate for toasting divorce.
• The segment is good-natured, juxtaposing personal freedom with the heaviness of the 9/11 date:
  • [05:43] John quoting Louis CK:
    “No good marriage ends in divorce.”
  • [05:56] John:
    “It’s never, a year later, a dude’s just, ‘Man, I can’t do this divorce anymore.’ It’s a great thing.”

Timestamps

• Personal divorce anniversaries & celebrations – [01:43] to [06:47]
• The Louis CK quote and philosophy of divorce – [05:43]

2. Rituals, Drinking, and Cultural Banter

Key Discussion Points

• Banter about celebratory drinks leads to a debate on the worst liqueurs from different cultures.
  • Malört (Chicago’s infamous bitter liqueur) and Sambuca (Italian anise liqueur), along with Greek ouzo and Jewish versions, get roasted.
• Playful shots at Italy’s wartime record and cultural “missteps.”

Notable Quotes

• [07:34] Host (on Italy):
  “They jumped the other side, too.”
• [07:52] Brett:
  “Wait a minute.”
• [07:53] John:
  “Sambuca is their worst, but every culture has that version.”

Timestamps

• Cultural liqueur discussion – [06:47] to [08:32]

3. John’s Health Treatment – “My Feet Are Growing!”

Key Discussion Points

• John discusses a new health regimen from Gameday Men’s Health, involving a synthetic peptide called sermorelin designed to boost human growth hormone naturally.
  • He praises their honest assessment (“You don’t need testosterone. Your levels are good.”) and their fit staff.
• Notable effects:
  • Tighter skin, better feeling, more workout results, but also unexpected: his left foot is growing, no longer fitting his collection of 230 Nike shoes.
  • [09:53] John:
    “I’m taking this thing called sermorelin… My feet are bigger and I don’t fit in my shoes anymore.”

Discussion Points

• The guys riff on whether John’s foot growth is due to the supplement, stopping soda, or playing more basketball.
  • Memories of past growing feet during athletic seasons.
• Brett shares his experience of having one significantly larger foot and the lack of half sizes after US 12.
• Light jokes about what else could be growing, with references to Barry Bonds’ notorious size increases during his baseball career.

Memorable Quotes

• [11:20] Brett:
  “You want to get rid of any [Nikes]?”
• [13:12] John:
  “I was sideshow Bob’s feet… I couldn’t play shortstop in the men’s league because my feet were too big.”
• [16:21] Brett (on Barry Bonds’ transformation):
  “Nobody’s head grows when they’re 28. Barry, what are you doing?”

Timestamps

• Health treatment intro and effects – [08:36] to [16:51]

4. Light-hearted Banter & Wrapping Up

Key Discussion Points

• The team continues to joke about John’s shoes not fitting, with Toledo suggesting his daughter Kirby might inherit the lot.
• Shout outs to listeners texting in, and a return to the Barry Bonds theme.
• Brief mention of the next guest, comedian Keegan Tindall, arriving to lighten the show.

Notable Quotes

• [15:13] John:
  “Does she wear 12 in men’s? Because I got 230 pairs to hand out…”
• [17:27] John:
  “Keegan Tindall’s gonna be here in just a second. He’s got a job that no one wants — stand up comedian on September 11.”

Timestamps

• Shoe banter & closing humor – [15:06] to [17:53]

Standout Clip Recommendations

• Divorce anniversary stories & philosophy: [02:00] – [06:47]
• John’s health/foot growth journey: [08:32] – [14:39]
• Banter on cultural liqueurs: [06:47] – [08:32]

Overall Tone & Takeaways

True to “HMS” form, the episode is a blend of irreverence, crude laughs, and personal candor. The hosts smoothly alternate between self-deprecating divorce stories, locker-room style humor, and curiosity-driven talk about health and change as they age – always with a wink to the audience. For new listeners, it’s a classic slice of the show’s mix: at once inappropriate, relatable, and weirdly affirming.