09-17-25 - Emailers First Concert Was Britney Spears w/His Mom In Her Whore Phase Reminding Us Our Parents Were Young And Virile Once Too

Summary

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Episode Overview

Title: Emailers First Concert Was Britney Spears w/His Mom In Her Whore Phase Reminding Us Our Parents Were Young And Virile Once Too
Podcast: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – 98 KUPD
Date: September 17, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

In this characteristically irreverent and boundary-pushing segment, Holmberg's Morning Sickness crew dives headlong into awkward and hilarious territory: the all-too-human reality that our parents were once young, sexually active, and just as susceptible to embarrassing moments as we are. The conversation is catalyzed by an emailer’s cringe-worthy first concert experience and quickly spirals into collective reminiscence (and oversharing) about parents, sex, and that horrifying realization that they, too, have “needs.”

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Email that Started it All: Britney Spears and "The Mom Whore Phase"

• [00:08] John Holmberg reads a listener email from "Burner Boy," who shares that his first concert was Britney Spears at 15, attended with his mom during what he jokingly called her “whore phase.”
  • Holmberg clarifies, “That’s no way to talk about your mother. Oh, Britney Spears. I see—she was grinding on a boa constrictor and rubbing her snooch on the backup dancers' faces. I was rocking an awkward teenage boner all night.”
  • The hosts riff on the inherent weirdness of realizing parents might have been just as "into it" as awkward teens.

2. Confronting Parental Sexuality: Over-Sharing Gone Wild

• [01:04] Holmberg reflects: “You have to remember that your mom probably was a little extra moist too because no one likes to think of their mothers as sexually alive.”
• The guys proceed to exchange stories about moments that shattered any illusions of parental innocence, highlighting just how universal these cringe-inducing experiences can be:
  • Holmberg’s infamous “Monsters Ball” story (with both he and his dad watching an unexpectedly graphic sex scene together):

    “My dad and I are in his place, sitting on the couch… Then it happened. I had sweatpants on, and my dad was on the couch, and I was on the floor, you know, watching the TV… After that scene was over, he goes, ‘I don’t want to watch this anymore.’”
    —John Holmberg, [03:13]

  • The group discusses other movies and moments where accidental “boner overlap” with a parent was unavoidable.

3. Family Vacation Overshares: Hotel Rooms & Unwelcome Realizations

• [05:01] Holmberg tells a vivid story about a Huntington Beach vacation, where his parents’ “togetherness” becomes unavoidably obvious thanks to tiny shorts and an incautious exit:
  • “My dad goes into the bathroom with my mom and then comes out in these shorts that I think would have fit me at age 13… And my sister goes, ‘Ah, gross.’ And it made me look. ... You still have half a boner.”
    —John Holmberg, [05:52]
• The hosts get animated talking about the perils of sharing hotel rooms with parents and siblings, from surprise erections to swimsuit malfunctions and a sister’s poolside mishap.

4. Universal Discomfort: Why We Can't Handle Parental Sexuality

• The discussion expands into why it is so difficult to tolerate the idea of parental sex:
  • “You don’t like to think of your parents as sexually active… But that was the only time I actually saw my dad—you knew it. Well, when I looked, he, she was right. He still had half a—at least half a one.”
    —John Holmberg, [08:31]
• Jokes about “mom’s sop socks,” “torpedo hoses,” and how everyone’s parents “did it,” no matter how much we want to avoid the truth.
• The group begins to rattle off possible band names spawned from the conversation, e.g., “Mama Sop Socks” and “Marcy’s Little Debbies.”

5. Intergenerational Trauma and Humor

• [11:24] The hosts riff on the idea of post-coital parents giving kids a goodnight kiss:
  • “Think about all the times your mom came in and kissed you good night after doing things to your dad with that mouth of hers.”
    —John Holmberg, [11:21]
  • “Ooh, what’s that musky smell? —That’s Hellman’s.”
    —(Exchange, [11:37])
• Crowning the realization: everyone’s parents are human, with all the attending messiness.

6. Emailers and Listener Questions

• Listeners write in asking about awkward childhood and family situations—like Brady's daughter Kirby wanting to sleep in the same room, and whether anyone snuck in parental “action” under such conditions (prompting plenty of mock indignation and escalating jokes).

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• "Now you tell that story that way. But you have to remember that your mom probably was a little extra moist too… No one likes to think of their mothers as sexually alive."
  —John Holmberg [01:04]

• “It was the first time that as adults, we had boners at the same time in the same space... That was not a comfortable moment.”
  —John Holmberg, recalling the "Monsters Ball" VHS [03:14]

• “You just boned my mother, you pig, in the bathroom of a room we’re sharing!”
  —John Holmberg, to his dad (recounting past vacation trauma) [05:57]

• “My dad’s running around with the Aleutian Islands on his pants. My sister’s pissing herself. I’m the only normal one. Family vacation.”
  —John Holmberg [07:50]

• “Don’t you want to know what your mom was thinking?... She’s gonna tell you ‘I thought it was just inappropriate and disgusting’—because she’s thinking about your boner. But what you’re not thinking about was mom’s sop sock down there, that was just going nuts.”
  —John Holmberg [09:32]

• “There’s plenty of moms driving to work right now, Little Debbie style. They’re human beings. Your moms are human. Even your mom, Brady!”
  —John Holmberg [10:12]

• “Think about all the times your mom came in and kissed you good night after doing things to your dad with that mouth of hers. … Ooh, what’s that musky smell? —That’s Hellman’s.”
  —John Holmberg and show team [11:21-11:40]

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• [00:08] Listener email about the Britney Spears concert with Mom
• [01:04] Discussion: Uncomfortable realization of parents as sexual beings
• [03:13] “Monsters Ball” VHS story—double awkwardness with dad
• [05:01] Family vacation hotel room & dad’s post-coital mishap
• [08:31] Revisiting the trauma of “seeing” dad’s afterglow
• [09:32] Why parents-as-humans is so tough to swallow
• [11:21] Goodnight kisses after parental “fun,” and the horror
• [12:45] Jokes about sister Caitlyn discovering an awkward “tent pole”
• [14:02] Response to listener queries about sneaking “action” with kids nearby

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Tone & Style

The segment is raw, unfiltered, and full of uncomfortably funny anecdotes that straddle the line between taboo and universal truth. Holmberg and his co-hosts lean into the awkwardness with signature gallows humor, inviting listeners to cringe along and recognize their own family “traumas.”

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Summary

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness delivers a raucous, no-holds-barred take on the mortifying realization that our parents were (and likely still are) virile, sexual beings. Sparked by a listener’s email about experiencing a Britney Spears concert with his mom, the discussion quickly unspools into a series of personal stories and collective jokes that lay bare the universal discomfort of growing up—and of accepting that our parents had (and have) sex lives.

Loaded with laugh-out-loud moments and just the right amount of "too much information," this episode leaves listeners both grateful for their own family boundaries, and sharing in the darkly comedic realization that we are all, at some level, products of parental passion—no matter how hard we might try to forget.

Transcript

[A]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[B]

You thought that was funny. You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you? Going back and forth. I have to apologize to a man named Burner Boy. Burner has emailed me and told me his first concert. We were talking about that earlier in the show. Says my first concert was Britney Spears at 15 with my mom. It was her whore face. That's no way to talk about your mother. Oh, Britney Spears. I see she was grinding on a boa constrictor and rubbing her snooch on the backup dancers faces. I was rocking an awkward teenage boner all night. I then responded to Burner Boy by saying, now you tell that story that way. But you have to remember that your mom probably was a little extra moist too because no one likes to think of their mothers as sexually alive. You were 15, she's probably 20 or 38. Probably. She's still sexually active woman and people. Yeah, she could have been 30. You don't know. There's a very strong possibility of that. So she's in her 30s. She's still a active lady who gets turned on. She was at the sex show just like you. And he said, well, there it is, John, I'm going to drive off the side of South Mountain now. And I'm like, we don't like to think of our mothers as human beings who had sex needs. And she was at the Britney Spears show. Show just like you. And I said while you were sitting there with that little boner, you should have given over. I, I actually used the phrase giving that little monkey a tap. So I. And then I laughed hysterically while I emailed back and I'm like, that was too far. I have to apologize. So I apologize, fella. I know that was true of me and my dad the first time we watched Monsters Ball not knowing what that movie was. And I'm pretty sure that was the first time both of us acknowledged that we were in a room together. And both of us were hard. And I blame my friend Colin for that movie review being hard. Yes. All right. He gave us the copy of the tape of a movie.

[C]

You knew what you were in for.

[B]

I had no idea.

[C]

Oh, I thought you did.

[B]

Monsters Ball was not even like an. It was submitted to the academy way before it was in the public knowledge. And he was a movie reviewer and he's like, you've got to See this? And he didn't tell me. He goes, this is a spectacular movie. It's going to win a ton of awards, and no one's heard of it yet, but it's coming out in a few weeks. And I'm like, oh. No one knew the sex scene or anything else. And my dad and I were. My mom was gone out of town or something. I don't remember. My dad and I are in the. In his. In his place and sitting on the couch, cowboy hat. There's nothing on tv. And I'm like, colin gave me a movie. You want to watch it? It's Billy Bob Thornton, a guy from Sling Blade. Halle Berry's in it. And he goes, yeah, sure. I said, it's supposed to be great. He goes, sure, pop it in. Put it in there. And then it happened. And I had sweatpants on, and my dad was on the couch, and I was on the floor, you know, watching the tv. And I didn't turn around, and he didn't say anything. And then after that scene was over, he goes, I don't want to watch this anymore.

[C]

I'm going to bed.

[B]

We kind of stopped watching Monster's Ball together because it was the first time that as adults, we'd. We had boners at the same time in the same space Rat. With your dad.

[C]

That was.

[A]

No, I don't think so.

[C]

Mine was in the theater. It was, I think, Caddyshack.

[A]

Yeah, that might have been it on HBO or something.

[B]

Yeah, but when you're a little kid, like, your dad's not that. His little boy boners. Hilarious. When you're like, I was a functioning adult when Monsters Ball came out. My dad, clearly a functioning adult. And we both watched that, thinking, I wish he wasn't here right now. And then we realized it was. It was just we shouldn't be watching this together.

[A]

Well, what about when your sister was having the 80s video shoots out back when all her hot friends.

[B]

I don't know that we were bonered up. We definitely stared out the window together. He asked me to leave, though. My dad would actually. Because it was his room that had a view of the pool.

[A]

Okay, okay.

[B]

So he would stand in the. In the doors to the pool or the window to the pool. It was like a bush underneath. It was a big window. And he would always stand with his hands on his hips, and I think it was just to get space so I didn't get too close. And then I would stand on the other side of the window and my dad be like, yeah, you got to get out of here. You don't need to see this. These hot girls in the backyard. My sister had all these smoking hot friends. Tell me again about this experience. Boners with your dad. Yeah, you could. Yeah, you could. You get a boner and your dad gets one at the same time. Yeah, I'm unfamiliar. You're unfamiliar with the concept of fathers, but trust me, that's the day I kind of wished I was you. I don't say that too often, but I wish I was. Toledo popped into my mind when I realized my dad was hard and about nine feet away. Not a comfortable moment. Did you ever see your dad?

[C]

Pretty good movie, right? Yeah.

[B]

Yeah. You never saw your dad with a half a wood?

[C]

No.

[B]

We were in Huntington beach once. This is why I think this is probably why I don't like sharing hotel rooms. Like, get your own room. This is weird. So my dad, we were going to the beach and we stayed at the hotel that was right across the street from Huntington Beach. We're all excited about everything. My sister was like 16 or 17, so she knew her way around a male penis by that point. I'm positive of it. I barely knew my own, but I was like 13, just thrilled to be at the beach. My dad goes into the bathroom with my mom and then comes out in these shorts that I think would have fit me at age 13. My dad used to work out pretty heavy. He was pretty big guy. So he. The beach was going to be a show. He was like, Larry Lobster from.

[C]

They're like. They're like coaches shorts, but swimsuit.

[B]

Yeah, they were swimsuit coaches shorts. They're way too short. They were low riding. And he came out of the bathroom with my mom and my sister goes, ah, gross. And it made me look. So I turned and she goes, oh, I know what you guys were doing in there. My dad's like, what are you talking about? You still have half a boner. And I'm like. And of course my dad turned right into like angry dad at that point. The hell's wrong with you? The hell is wrong with you? Why even the hell is wrong with you? That's all he kept saying to her. And he's like, you're the one with the boner coming out. You just boned my mother, you pig. In the bathroom of a room monkey of a room we're sharing. And he patted mom's monkey. So then I had to think about that, but my mom just got railed and now we're on the beach together. It wasn't normal 24 years.

[C]

Thanks for sharing that.

[B]

That one just popped in my head. That's a. That's one that just. And then that was the time my sister peed in her pink bikini and then tried to get in the ocean was crying. I'm like, just get in the water. No one's gonna know. Dad's being a dick. And I'm like, he's being a dick. Why did you even bring that up on this? Morning sickness upd Limu Emu. And Doug. Here we have the Limu emu in its natural habitat helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug. Limu is that guy with the binoculars watching us. Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you need@liberty mutual.com.

[C]

Liberty.

[B]

Liberty.

[C]

Liberty.

[B]

Liberty Savings. Very underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company affiliates.

[C]

Excludes Massachusetts.

[B]

Holmberg's morning sickness. But he just railed my mother in the bathroom of a room we're all sharing. Anybody else does that, it might be a fist fight. Dad does it and it's a right to it. Then I gotta think of my mom. Now I'm thinking of it. There I am with little Debbie sitting next to me and my mom. My dad's running around with the Aleutian Islands on his pants. My sister's pissing herself. I'm the only normal one. Family vacation. But you don't. Again, going back to what I'm saying. You don't like to think of your parents as sexually active. My mom. But that was the only time I actually saw my dad. You knew it. Well, when I looked, he. She was right. He still had half a. At least half a one.

[C]

She had a glow.

[B]

She was still in the bathroom, probably mopping up. Well, it's what you do, Brady. You've been there. You know, that's something you don't like to think of your mom doing. You know, cleaning it up down there.

[C]

And for the most part, yeah.

[B]

I never really from a good tom torpedo hose had that.

[C]

Other than knowing, you know. Now putting the two and two together. They had at it Saturday afternoon naps.

[B]

Your dad would tug his pants back up and go watch Mutual of Omaha with you. Fresh off of releasing all over your mother.

[C]

Dad, Kim's wrestling an anaconda.

[B]

Nobody likes to think of their parents.

[A]

Your mom already did that.

[B]

What's that, boy? I was sleeping really drowsy. Nobody likes to think of their parents as human beings. But you have to. You take your mom to the phase Britney Times she was looking at those male dancers are for moms, Brittany. Rubbing up against that anaconda. Don't you want to know what your mom was thinking? She's gonna tell you. I thought it was just inappropriate and disgusting. Because she's thinking about your boner. He probably had a boner. That's gross. But what you're not thinking about was mom's sop sock down there. That was just going nuts.

[C]

You were. You were close enough on that. The stories where the people the kid walked in on, the parents going at it.

[B]

There's several of those. Oh, yeah, yeah. Look, there's sop socks. Are mom sop socks or not? They're common. It's a common problem. There's a mom right now has got.

[A]

One that's a ba. That's a Palladio band name.

[B]

It is Mama sop socks. There's plenty of moms driving to work right now, Little Debbie style. They're human beings. Your moms are human. Even your mom, Brady. Yeah, she used to. Her knees used to hit her shoulders sometimes. No, we don't like to think about that.

[C]

I like to think about. She's heading into Dr. McLaughlin's office to clean some teeth.

[B]

Yeah, with a sop sock. A torpedo sop sock. Asking people how they're doing with their hands in their mouths. Well, she's just holding on for dear life down south to make sure she doesn't make a mess.

[A]

Somebody want to know if. Somebody wants to know if Marcy's Little Debbie's is a good band name.

[B]

Do it.

[A]

You may just win. Play the other.

[B]

Anyway, that was not what I wanted to talk about. But it is because this guy did that. It's gross to think your parents doing that stuff. But then you think about all the Kellen's, right? Think about all the times your mom came in and kissed you good night after doing things to your dad with that mouth of hers.

[C]

Didn't happen.

[B]

Happened, happened. I forgot to tuck Brady. And when you started to ravage me. Hey, better go kiss him good night with mouth. Night, mom. Night, Petey.

[A]

Ooh, what's that musky smell?

[B]

That's Hellman's.

[C]

Oh, man.

[B]

It's a thing, man. My parents did it right there in our two bed, one bath hotel room. Gotta hand it to him. Didn't hear a thing while it was going on. My sister had to point out the.

[C]

Extras and came out in his cutoff Steelers football pants.

[B]

They were red. They were bright red with white. I'll never forget it. It's Burned into my brain. Red. Red pants. White stripes down the side. Like Adidas. Three white stripes down the side. Covered up about.

[C]

That's right. When they came out with those like.

[B]

Football pants shorts, they weren't that long. These were borderline.

[C]

Well, I'm saying they're tight. They used to cut them off. It looked like football pants were cut off.

[B]

These were. They went barely past the balls. In fact, balls went lower than the legs. They were up there real high. Dad wore those. And evidently after activity. You never saw your dad's no wood.

[A]

I. At this point, I'd own it, but.

[B]

That'S what I'm doing. At that time, I don't know that I knew, but I mean, I could.

[A]

Have blocked it, but I don't remember and should have.

[B]

I wish I could. It isn't good.

[A]

Your sister rectator.

[B]

That's so bad. You know who I feel sorry for right now? She'll tell her story someday. Sweet Caitlyn. That girl that Brady drove over to San Diego didn't realize that he's. You know. Because if you have knocked, if you're a man and you're a healthy man, and maybe that's the best thing that could have happened at the time you were not a healthy man. You're supposed to get really good rigid wood in the middle of the night while you're sleeping. Poor Caitlyn probably went to pee and did that tiptoe to the bathroom. That strange man that took her to San Diego in July and looked over, just peered over to see if you were asleep, and there you are with a tent pole. A sheets volcano with your CPAP on it. Had to look like a monster. Hi, Caitlin. Oh my God, he's awake. Hi, Mr. Boogen. Ignore the thing that's hard to ignore. I'll take care of that. While you're peeing.

[A]

Somebody asked. Is asking, Brady. Didn't Kirby always like to sleep in the same room as you guys?

[B]

Yeah.

[A]

Any Ronnie action with that?

[B]

Did you sneak it in while the nesting was going on?

[C]

No.

[B]

Never once.

[C]

I mean, I. I would have.

[B]

Gross. Don't say that. You're disgusting. You tell terrible stories.

[A]

That's cool by now to tell the truth.

[B]

Payback for what just got you grossed out. It's not me that should. I'm fine. I have nothing. It was just disgusting. His family would do that in front of each other. What's the matter with you? We're family. That's right. Stop it. There you go. We got it. Rock Wars. It's Wednesday, huh? Rock wars. Right around the corner. It's 98 KUPD, Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.