Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – 09-24-25 FULL SHOW – WEDNESDAY – 98KUPD

Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness centers around pop culture beefs (including the latest Jimmy Kimmel controversy), local sports—especially the Arizona Diamondbacks' improbable playoff push—and a spirited, often unfiltered roundtable about everything from Jewish dietary laws to Arizona’s new restrictions on adult websites. The show’s hosts—John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo—bring their signature irreverence, roasting public figures, riffing on local news, and sharing personal anecdotes in an energetic, unapologetic style.

Major Discussion Segments

1. Jimmy Kimmel’s Controversy on ABC

[03:00–10:30]

• Holmberg rails on Jimmy Kimmel’s tearful monologue regarding his recent controversy and ABC’s handling.
• John contrasts Kimmel’s show with classic Late Night icons (Letterman, etc.), arguing Kimmel has no culturally memorable moments.
• Critiques Kimmel’s insincerity and lack of comedic backbone:

  “Man, oh man, the crying and how now suddenly he's like, oh my God, I can't believe I hurt someone's feelings. Like, no, you're a comedian. Sometimes you do step on toes. Own it.” — John Holmberg [06:28]

• The cast jokes about the only memorable parts of Kimmel involving him crying over political losses.
• Discussion shifts into how media scandals grant undeserved relevance to aging talk show hosts and how the political left/right both exploit these moments.
• Memorable Quote:

  “As a nation, let's get back to ignoring Jimmy Kimmel.” — John Holmberg [09:35]

2. Kamala Harris and Political Gaffes

[12:00–13:00]

• Brief aside about Kamala Harris’s book tour fumble, her comments on running mates, and further political grilling.
• Hosts lampoon Harris’s attempt to clarify statements about not picking Pete Buttigieg as VP.

• “She's burning every bridge.” — Brett Vesely [12:45]

3. Arizona Diamondbacks and Tori Lavello’s Management

[13:00–18:30]

• Extended praise for D-backs’ manager Tori Lavello for keeping the team in playoff contention despite mid-season trades and a depleted roster.
• John likens Lavello to a miracle-working mom making a meal out of nothing:

  "Tory Lavello might be the greatest manager of no talent ever. You give him some talent. He's not very good. You give him nothing—this dude can make magic.” — John Holmberg [13:20]

• Discussion on sports “miracle” seasons, comparisons to 2003 Marlins, and fandom moments (Randy Johnson, Shohei Ohtani).

• “If you’ve always stunk at baseball, come to Arizona. Tory will make it so you can actually win.” — John Holmberg [15:44]

4. Life Goals and Kitchens: Post-Birthday Party Reflections

[19:00–24:00]

• John recounts attending a friend’s birthday in a house with “four kitchens,” musing on wealth and Jewish kosher kitchen rules.
• Spirited riffing on two-kitchen households:

  “Say it’s in the kitchen. And someone says ‘which kitchen?’ You have made it.” — John Holmberg [21:56]

• Dive into Jewish observance and kosher rules—double kitchens, separation of meat and dairy, manual appliances for Sabbath observance, and even interpretations on “Sabbath goys.”
• Plenty of playful stereotyping within a comic context.

5. Religious Observance, Food Rules & Saturday Softball

[24:30–37:50]

• The crew expands on Jewish Sabbath traditions, poking fun at restrictive dietary laws and how Orthodox Jews keep Sabbath—including a story about Orthodox softball games in full religious garb.
• Extended riffing on the differences between various religions’ ease vs. strictness of the rules, especially comparing Protestant confessional “Etch-a-Sketch” resets with Jewish dietary fastidiousness.

• “Give me a God that wants me in nice, comfortable clothes. None of these robes and heavy items.” — John Holmberg [31:30]

6. Arizona’s New Pornhub Restrictions

[49:30–65:00]

• Big segment on Arizona’s new law requiring age-verification (via official ID) to access adult sites like Pornhub.
• John frames it as a government overreach, an unnecessary obstacle for responsible adults, and a classic case of legislative micromanagement for “think of the children” politics.
• Extended banter about digital workarounds, parental responsibility, and a live Katie Hobbs impression roasting Brett for not needing porn anyway.

• “Pornhub provides a service that is absolutely legal. And if your kids are getting on there without you knowing it, that's not the government's job. That's the parents job.” — John Holmberg [51:54]

• “You want to talk about First Amendment violations, the government getting involved in what I click on — that’s what this is about.” — John Holmberg [51:53]

7. Jonas Brothers Concert Bumped for Mercury WNBA Playoffs

[77:14–87:50]

• The hosts mock the decision to move a sold-out Jonas Brothers concert to accommodate a Mercury WNBA playoff game at the Phoenix Arena.
• Sympathetic to the vendors losing money, John lampoons the WNBA’s lower attendance and “fragile egos.”

• “I actually kind of hope the Mercury win the championship. So the parade is embarrassing again.” — John Holmberg [83:36]

• Imagines adding the Jonas Brothers as players to the Mercury and jokes they’d easily outscore the pros.

8. Rock Wars, Offbeat Math, and Listener Interactions

[119:07–157:28]

• Weekly “Rock Wars” music selection contest, with topical themes around the Mercury and John’s “forced” tattoo bet [152:26+].
• Hilarious confusion over a math segment involving “how many weekends left in your life,” with Brady hopelessly tangled in numbers while John and Brett tease mercilessly.
• Calls back an old “Mercury tattoo bet,” with John resigned to the possibility no one can even name three Mercury players.
• Memorable Moment: “I'm not going to live through this show if you keep this up.” — John Holmberg [103:44]

9. Random Observations & Closing Bits

[142:01–168:48]

• John recounts an interaction with a slow pedestrian who recognized him while crossing the street.
• Chat about robot umps in baseball, the role of technology, and the sport’s generational struggles.
• Brief news/entertainment roundtable: A tease of a Baywatch reboot, “just for the rescues!” and reactions to local celebrity news.
• Classic show close:

  “Wednesday’s in the books. You guys have yourselves a spectacular day and we’ll see you tomorrow right here in the morning sickness.” — John Holmberg [168:44]

Notable Quotes & Memorable Exchanges

• On the Kimmel/ABC Debacle:
  “This show’s not important. And he tried to make it seem like, this isn't any. But why is this show being paid attention to? … He thought his show was so important … which he should have just left alone.” — John Holmberg [04:50]

• On religious food laws:
  “You can't go to heaven because that time you drank milk and had meat? I wore wool on Saturdays in Phoenix, you bastard. And you tell me I can't get in because of meat milk thing?” — John Holmberg [23:35]

• On Diamondbacks’ miracle run:
  “He's kind of a God around here with nobody knowing that. We're too busy paying attention to Jimmy Kimmel than to look down the street and go, that manager we got there is pretty damn impressive.” — John Holmberg [15:09]

• On Arizona’s new porn restrictions:
  “Why do your guidelines that you’ve lost control of your kids have to stop me from doing stuff? I should have safe and free pornography on my phone.” — John Holmberg [63:20]

• On the WNBA/arena scheduling:
  “Women want equality—then be better … they realize Jonas Brothers is a bigger draw. … Mercury would be an opening act.” — John Holmberg [86:04]

• On listener memory of his Mercury tattoo bet:
  “I do like to be the person that, you know, if I said I’d go do this silly thing, I’ll do it.” — John Holmberg [138:23]

Important Timestamps

• [03:00–10:30] — Jimmy Kimmel/ABC controversy
• [13:00–18:30] — Diamondbacks’ playoff magical run
• [21:30–24:30] — Two-kitchen households & kosher laws riff
• [49:30–65:00] — Arizona Pornhub restrictions & Katie Hobbs skit
• [77:14–87:50] — Jonas Brothers concert moved for WNBA playoff; hilarious takedown of WNBA business model
• [119:07–157:28] — Rock Wars, Mercury tattoo bet, math confusion segment

Show Tone, Style & Flow

Holmberg & crew perform unfiltered social commentary: sarcasm and mockery are frequent, self-deprecating and over-the-top humor is common, and the banter moves quickly—often looping back to prior gags (Mercury tattoo, Kimmel crying) with repeat call-backs. Local flavor is strong, with solid knowledge of Arizona sports and culture. The roundtable setup encourages everyone to riff, jump in, and escalate the original bit into fresh, absurd territory.

For Listeners Who Missed It

This episode is quintessential Morning Sickness: irreverent, whip-smart, local, and unafraid to push boundaries or poke fun at sacred cows. If you want a recap of Arizona’s pop culture news, locker-room-level jokes about government overreach, or simply want to hear the best awkward math segment you’ll find on local radio, this episode’s a must.

Bottom line:

• Jimmy Kimmel’s weak apology and ABC “caving” dominated the pop culture chat.
• Arizona Diamondbacks defying expectations brought genuine local sports pride.
• Arizona’s new porn ID laws were roasted as government overreach.
• WNBA playoff scheduling was mocked, especially as it bumped a Jonas Brothers show.
• Rapid-fire tangents covered everything from double kitchens to AI-written music.
• The episode’s defining flavor: roast anyone, including themselves, without restraint.