09-26-25 - Weather Alerts Going Off And Local News Will Love Flood Alerts - Killer Squirrel Attacking People In San Fran Park - Alyssa Milano Hailed As Hero For Removing Her Breast Implants

Summary

Podcast Summary – Holmberg's Morning Sickness

Episode: 09-26-25
Date: September 26, 2025
Main Theme:
A humorous and lively exploration of current news stories and pop culture, with the hosts using their trademark snark and irreverence to weigh in on weather hype, infamous sports figures, a rampaging squirrel in San Francisco, and Alyssa Milano’s headline-grabbing decision to remove her breast implants.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Media Sensationalism and Arizona Weather Hysteria

• Timestamps: 00:40–10:44
• The hosts poke fun at how local news and phone alerts create hysteria around weather events, especially flash flooding and hurricanes.
• They mock the introduction of new meteorological terms (“hashi”, “horacho”, “verga”, “grapple”) and the idea that weather reporting is always seeking high drama.
• Repeatedly, the hosts lampoon the eagerness of media outlets to “innovate” weather phenomena with weird new names and to root for disasters to boost ratings.
• Quote:
  • "Just because you're racing to be the first one to tell me it's raining, my phone explodes constantly..." (Brett, 01:59)
  • "[The news is] just making up words every hurricane season to try to make them worse, so we’re more afraid and...watch TV longer." (Brett, 03:13)
• They joke about the Spanish terms local meteorologists use (“verga”), playing with linguistic misunderstandings for comedic effect.
• There’s a running gag about how much the public lets weather forecasters off the hook for wrong predictions compared to other professions.

2. Tom Brady, Raiders Ownership & The Nature of Suspicion

• Timestamps: 10:52–22:26
• The team dissects Tom Brady’s response to accusations of potential conflict of interest, calling his statements classic “bad guy spin.”
• They analyze how Brady frames himself as above suspicion, referencing his Deflategate scandal days and general air of untouchability in Boston.
• The hosts argue about the NFL’s ethical standards, especially relating to gambling and the Patriots’ historic cheating scandals.
• Quotes:
  • “Tom Brady is a textbook high functioning sociopath...Patrick Bateman.” (Brett, 19:21)
  • "If you've had a dude steal your wallet...five times, you're like, he's stolen wallets...But, somehow or another, got my wallet back...And then there's Tom hanging around..." (Brett, 19:30)
  • “Tommy would never” is used repeatedly to satirize diehard fans’ blind loyalty.
• They make broader points about how sports fandom and media let serial behavior slide due to charisma or past successes.

3. Killer Squirrel Attacks in San Francisco

• Timestamps: 22:26–31:38
• The hosts riff on news of an aggressive squirrel attacking people, exaggerating the terror and poking fun at tough guys’ supposed reactions.
• Discussion touches on how feeding wildlife leads to dangerous animal behavior, and makes comic hay out of big, burly men’s reactions to small animals.
• They create a Rocky & Bullwinkle-inspired skit, making the squirrel hilariously homophobic and out of place in San Francisco’s culture.
• Quotes:
  • “A squirrel leaping out of a tree might be the scariest thing in the world...Two people have gone to the emergency room.” (Brett, 24:10)
  • “That squirrel jumps on him, you’re going to hear [a shriek], and pee’s going to dribble out of him.” (Brett, 26:01)
  • “Cute.” – “Here come the furries.” (29:39)
• There’s a tone of farcical absurdity throughout, using the “killer squirrel” as a foil for human cowardice and city stereotypes.

4. Alyssa Milano & Breast Implant Removal: Debating Body Image and Accountability

• Timestamps: 32:18–49:44
• Alyssa Milano’s decision to remove her breast implants is met with sarcastic skepticism. The hosts reminisce about her teen-idol status, using her story as a launchpad for a discussion on beauty standards and personal responsibility.
• The conversation veers into issues around celebrity, self-presentation, and self-victimization, humorously pondering why some celebrities blame society for choices that benefitted them.
• Sharp, occasionally provocative humor is used to question Milano’s reasoning, including gender-flipped analogies (men getting implants for sex appeal) and jabs at shifting trends (“now you’re 52 and you’re mad at the world...”).
• Quotes:
  • "If you think people liked you just because of your breasts, it’s because you didn’t develop a personality." (Brett, 34:17)
  • "Why in the world would you take out the thing people liked and then blame them for liking it?" (Brett, 42:08)
  • "If women said all across the board, all heterosexual women said, what I love is a man with a third nipple on his forehead, there would be a billion dollar industry that started the next day..." (Brett, 37:31)
• They compare Milano to actresses who embraced their sexuality (Jamie Pressly, Jane Mansfield), and joke about the “heroism” ascribed to such personal choices.

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Memorable Moments & Notable Quotes

• Comedic banter on weather lingo:
  “[They] learned what grapple was, and the news was really excited that they named something new. It was nothing...” (05:28)
• On Tom Brady's 'bad guy' spin:
  “A good guy would say, ‘Oh, people think I'm being crooked. I better step away.’ A bad guy tells you you're wrong.” (Brett, 12:20)
• On the San Francisco squirrel:
  “I swear, there isn't a person on the planet alive, if a squirrel jumped out of a tree, you wouldn't squeal and piss all over yourself.” (Brett, 23:45)
• On body image politics:
  “You took those [implants] out. Now you can go yourself.” (Brett, 40:48)
• On gendered double standards:
  “If women said all...what I love is a man with a third nipple on his forehead, there would be a billion dollar industry that started the next day...” (Brett, 37:31)

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Segment Timestamps

• 00:40 – Weather alerts & local news dramatization
• 04:08 – Meteorology terminology rant (“verga”, "grapple", etc.)
• 10:52 – Tom Brady, the NFL, ethics and conflicts of interest
• 19:21 – “Tom Brady is a textbook high-functioning sociopath”
• 22:26 – Killer squirrel in San Francisco segment
• 26:01 – Tough guy reactions to squirrel attacks
• 32:18 – Alyssa Milano, body image, implants & personal responsibility
• 37:31 – Gender-flipped analogies about implants
• 42:08 – When celebrities blame fans for their choices
• 49:44 – On beauty standards, trademarks, and personality

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Tone & Style

The episode leans heavily into fast-paced, irreverent banter packed with sarcasm, playful exaggeration, and candid opinion. Topics are spun for comic effect, often with sudden switches from absurdist humor to pointed cultural critique.

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Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness dives into meteorological melodrama, sports villainy, human-animal conflict, and celebrity self-justification. The hosts use current events as a jumping-off point for laughs, roasting media hysteria, scrutinizing public figures’ motives, and lampooning society’s shifting standards around image and authenticity. Fans of quick-witted, sometimes edgy humor and pop culture skewering will find plenty to enjoy.

Transcript

[Host]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Comedy Announcer]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Head downtown to Stand Up Live Thursday to see Ashley Gavin and Stephen Ho on Friday and Saturday. The Desert Ridge Improv up North features Aaron Weber all week long and East Siders. The Tempe Improv has Mikey Winfield on Thursday and Ashley Gavin finishes her week in Tempe on Friday and Saturday. For the complete lineups and for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com.

[Brett]

The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail. There you go. Miles to Nowhere, Palladio was 59 days away. 59 days to Palladio. For those of you who know what that is, the cringe was real. Those of you who don't, we'll see in 59 days. And maybe I'm rooting for Miles to Nowhere to repeat. I really liked the theme song and I don't really want to abandon that for next year. I do. I like what they did, so hopefully they'll come back, repeat, be a two time winner because that's all I'll allow is two in a row. Then you have to go off and make it. You can't keep winning this crappy local contest and feel good about yourself. Two times and you're out. They've entered it two years, they've won once. Third year, do it again. And plus, they're incredibly pleasurable people that like super nice. I really liked them, so they've been a good champion. 59 days to Plateo, by the way, for those of you who are driving in from the East Valley and you need a traffic report, don't worry about it because according to my phone, you're gonna need a canoe. You don't even need the freeway.

[Co-host]

Stay home.

[Brett]

They're scared to death of the like the flash flooding in Mesa. They say that it must be pouring out there right now. Is it? Let's take a look at the KUPD weather window.

[Host]

I'll text my wife.

[Brett]

Yeah, I don't know where the radar is right now, but hopefully it's everybody's all right. But alerts won't stop. I got to get over this whole first alert thing. Just because you're racing to be the first one to tell me it's raining, my phone explodes constantly now, currently, right now, it doesn't look like there's much little in Gilbert. It's way out there. Globes getting just. It's gone. There's no more glove is not going to make it.

[Host]

Here's the moving radar on screen here.

[Brett]

Yeah, well, it's all going into Mexico.

[Host]

Anyway, but it's coming up.

[Brett]

Oh, yeah. See what mine does. See if we have the same. Oh, it just explodes over the city later in the day. See, my radar is different than your radar. My moving radar kind of hangs around the town. Yours is leaving for a little bit and then.

[Host]

Yeah, it comes in about 9am it looks like it's going to either way, hammered.

[Brett]

Practice your rowing skills because the phone is acting like we've never seen rain like this in our lives. It'll be like a half inch. I was looking at the news last night and they did a thing about. I think they're rooting for hurricanes at this point. Like, when they're wrong and it's not a horrible hurricane. We're on H. Umberto. And they're like, it's almost October. And it's like, umberto. I'm like, that's H. That's a pretty good hurricane season. And they're like, but wait, there's more. We should be celebrating the fact we didn't have a ton of hurricanes because they're like, oh, global warming. We're now 15, 16. Every year we're going to have to come up with a new way to name them. And I'm like, oh, my gosh. And then this one pops up and Umberto is going to merge with some other thing. And they're like, it's called a hashi. Hashi. It's like some Japanese word. And like, you've never seen anything like it. I'm like, you guys are just making up words every hurricane season to try to make them worse for the news. So we. So we're more afraid and. And we watch TV longer because this, like, you haven't seen the. Has hoofy effect. And I'm like, that's not a thing. It was never a thing before. Oh, it's new. No, it's not. You're not even come up with new weather idea. Weather's not innovating new things. Yes, it is. No, it's two storms that come. I saw this in the George Clooney movie once two storms bump into each other and it gets bigger. Oh, it's called the hashidi effect.

[Co-host]

Team up.

[Brett]

And Florida will. Florida will not only get flooded, it'll just. It'll. It'll erode. Okay. And they're, like, rooting for it instead of going, hey, we've had a pretty mild hurricane season. We're only on H. And nothing's hit land yet. We should celebrate that. Come on. Idiots. So if your family's in Florida, you're going to start hearing about this new Japanese thing that hurricanes are doing, and they're doing it over there in the Caribbean. And, oh, the guy last night seemed like, you know what you're talking about Hurricane Smurricane. This thing's like, it's going to be like a category nine. Like, that's not a thing. Yeah, we'll make it one.

[Co-host]

New. New and improved.

[Brett]

New. They've. The weather goblins have gotten together. They've come up with some new scary stuff, and we figured it out. It's like they act like they're private investigators. Weather's the same.

[Co-host]

I learned another new one on one of the shows here talking about the. We call them haboobs here. Dust storms.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Co-host]

Followed by there's one behind thunderstorms in tornadoes. It's horacho.

[Brett]

A horacho. Isn't that just cinnamon milk? Oh, I'm sorry. I thought that was what that was. No, I. I find it very strange that they. They try to act like our weather is, like, plotting against us.

[Co-host]

Grapple was. Is that what it was like?

[Brett]

Yeah, grapple was a big deal. About 20 years ago here in town, we learned what grapple was, and the news was really excited that they named something new. And it was. We finally got some grapple, and it was nothing. Isn't what's. And the other one that I love is. I think it's Spanish Dick, otherwise known as verga. And that's rain that doesn't happen. The new weather would report we've got some verga that's falling from the sky. And then I'm like, verga falling from the sky. What an image. And then I'm like, green. Wait, they're serious. They're reporting on something that isn't happening. It's close to being a thing. We'll be right back. I'm like, it's rain that doesn't get to us. Which is that rain that doesn't count. It's called verga. It don't. No, you need the Internet. Look up what verga is, as in. I think there's. I don't know what I'm saying, but there's, like, a way that my landscapers have said verga. And something along the lines of chulo or chupy. Chupy. Me verga. I don't know.

[Co-host]

I'm not getting.

[Brett]

I don't know what I'm saying. I don't know what I'm saying. It's gibberish to me. But I know the weather says it a lot. And if I ever. I think they're just trying to get white people stabbed. If you're at a bus stop or something and you're sitting there, you're standing out in the front, you're like, man, verga. What'd you say? I'm like, oh, did I say something terrible?

[Host]

Did they follow a pinch a john.

[Brett]

Right after Pinch a john was. Was my name. And I paid those guys handsomely. Hey, guys.

[Guest]

Pincha John.

[Brett]

Like, that's right. That must mean, like cowboy or something. I had to look it up. I'm like, hey, wait a minute. I don't even think they like me. Pinch a john. What's up? Hey, guys, how's it going? It's good. It's 11 o'. Clock. You're already at lunch. Ah, pinch it John. Like, yeah.

[Guest]

Yahoo.

[Brett]

And I do like a cowboy nose. And I go inside, like, they call me Cowboy John. And I looked it up like, that is not cowboy. Hey, Senor Mariposa. I'm like, that must mean like emperor. Emperor of the planet. What's up, Senor Mariposa? Yeah, how's that? How's everything looking inside there, boys? You get the ceiling scraped? See? See? See? Yeah, yeah. Kulo melaya. Okay, I will. You guys enjoy your luncheon. Look it all up. That guy just told me to kiss his butthole. And what is this pinch they keep? And they all laughed because I'd wave.

[Co-host]

That's me.

[Brett]

That's me. I'm pinch a John. I still don't know what it means to be honest with. I just know it's not cowboy. Like, I thought that would have been caballero, because I looked up. How do you say cowboy in Spanish? Caballero. Well, that's not even. There's not even a. There's no two letters the same in the one they're calling me. Mine must be like king of the cowboys. Like, yeah, he's like royalty. Cowboy. Royalty. That must be what pinch a john means, doesn't. It doesn't verga weather, guys. There, we got a little verga in the air. That's just moisture in the air. That's not getting to us. That's not a news report. That's nothing.

[Co-host]

And what has happened to. That we haven't had.

[Brett]

Well, because eventually we all went back and said, you realize that's nothing, right? Why report that there's verga. Does it even come close to us? And at what border do we start reporting? Like, there's. There's. Yeah. The cloud has water in it. That. Okay. Yeah. When do. When do we not. Is it not disrupting traffic? The verga. And I still think that. Pull over. Your Verda's out. Weather goblins. Tired of them. I love Ian Schwartz. He's a good. He's a good buddy. I like him, but he's got. He knows it. He's got the world's scammiest job of all time. They can be. That's the. I mean, Jimmy Kimmel almost lost his job for incorrect information. We talked about it the day after. Like, when do the weathermen get held responsible for any of this stuff? Curb youb Enthusiasm still has the best episode I've ever seen of what weathermen do, which is report bad weather the day before. They've got a golf game. So. No. Everybody cancels their tee times. They have the golf course to themselves. And it doesn't actually rain. Yeah. I don't know what it means. Nah, it's too. I just got told what that is. I didn't know what Spanish is. I got a D. Actually got a C in college because I talked the teacher into.

[Co-host]

You got some extra credit?

[Brett]

Well, no. I had text as test anxiety. I would tell her and I'd be like, I know all of it. I just don't have. I'm so scared of tests. Oh, that's so sad. Because I recognized her as a bleeding heart who felt bad for people with mental disorders. So I pulled to Marvin Harrison and I'm like, I'm gonna half ass this and see if I can get away with it. And I went up and I said, I have test disorder. I've got a verga. Problems and anxiety when it comes to tests. I know. Yeah. And I know that it varied on the way in and I got nervous. So I pulled over because if it hit the ground, I wouldn't know what to do. But about 80 or 90ft above me, it was raining and I didn't know and I got scared. So I got a D on the test because of that, not because I wasn't prepared. She was an old bleeding horn.

[Guest]

She's like, I know.

[Brett]

I had a son with once. She said that to the class.

[Guest]

My son had test anxiety and struggled all through school.

[Brett]

So I can. I'm like, there it is.

[Host]

Game on.

[Brett]

There's my n. That's what I'm gonna use. Cause she's got a. Got a soft spot for that. And I'm gonna tap it like a baby's brain. I'm going for the soft spot for sure. Uh, there was a crime committed yesterday, and people. Oh, by the way, before I get into that, Tom Brady, the crooked pile of garbage that is Tom Brady, is now doing what the evil Disney bad guy would do when being accused. I feel very responsible for pushing this agenda as hard as I have that Tom Brady is up to it again. He's cheating as the owner of the Raiders and also as a broadcaster for Fox. And then he's sitting, and there's something going on. I can't pinpoint it yet. I just know when I see something that isn't right. Other executives have finally said, what the hell is Tom Brady doing in the coaching? They're starting to step up on the NFL thing, and they're so. Yeah, don't worry about it. Tom Brady addressed it, and he addressed it the exact way a bad guy would address something, basically saying things like, this is how he started. We're living through a great period of paranoia and distrust in the world. What does that have to do with you being a broadcaster and a 5% minority owner? You're blaming politics and, like, social disorders.

[Co-host]

I'm in the booth just serving the boys drinks and keeping them.

[Brett]

And by the way, Tom, during the game, there's a reason we're paranoid and distrustful of you. Then he said, I love football. At its core. It's a game of principles, and with all the success it has given me, I feel I have a moral and ethical duty to the sport, which is why the point where my roles in it intersect is not actually a point of conflict. A bad guy would say to the accusation of, I think you may have a little conflict of interest here. He would turn and say, no, I don't. And that would be his defense. It wouldn't be backed up with anything. And a bad guy. A good guy would say, oh, people think I'm being crooked. I better step away. A bad guy tells you you're wrong. So despite what the paranoid and distrustful might believe, uh, I do not have a conflict. It's the place from which my ethical duty emerges to grow, evolve, and improve the game that's given me everything. When you live through uncertain and untrusting times like we are today, again, he's reminding you there's a lot of things you don't trust. There's no reason to lump me into this bad guy talk. It's very easy to watch a person's passions and professions intersect and to believe you're looking at some sort of dilemma. Because when you're blinded by distrust. Great spin, Tom. It's hard to see anything other than self. Interesting. Here we have the Limu Emu in its natural habitat helping people customize their car insurance and save hundreds with Liberty Mutual. Fascinating. It's accompanied by his natural ally, Doug Limu. Is that guy with the binoculars watching us? Cut the camera. They see us. Only pay for what you [e-mail] Liberty, Liberty. Liberty. Liberty Savings. Very underwritten by Liberty Mutual Insurance Company affiliates.

[Co-host]

Excludes Massachusetts.

[Brett]

Holmberg's morning sickness. People who are like that, particularly to a chronic pathological degree. Now he's passive aggressively saying, you might be a bipolar person are telling themselves and they're showing you their worldview and how they operate. They're admiring that they can only conceive of interests that are selfish and they cannot imagine a person doing a job for reasons that are greater than themselves. Tom's quote was, wow, I'm bigger than you. You've got trust issues. The world is something you can't trust. I'm above that. And that's what he's trying to sell us when somebody just said, is this a conflict of interest here? What you got going on? Simple question. And he broke down that Ukraine and Russia and you can't trust any politicians. But I'm above all this. That's bad guy talk.

[Co-host]

Dear unhoused people.

[Host]

Who is his speechwriter?

[Brett]

I think it's him. He is smooth. Is it smooth? I see right through it. Brett.

[Host]

No, it's smooth for the dummies out there.

[Brett]

No, the dummies will eat that up. You're 100% right. The dummies have smart big words. 100% correct about that.

[Host]

Everybody in Boston's by Tommy.

[Brett]

Come on. He's ethical. Tommy would never. Tommy would never. Got passion. You can't see it because you've got no passion. The Raiders are lucky. We wish I was a raider. A raider. I need to be a raider. Tommy would never. You're right. They're eating it a lot because he's always waved his hand Obi Wan style and told them, nothing to see here. Bostonians. Tommy would never. He said so you what? Do you think Tommy would lie? I repeat, Tommy would never. But he does.

[Co-host]

They don't seem to have that passion on the Belichick.

[Host]

Remember.

[Brett]

Remember Tom Brady in his ski cap. He dressed like one of the kids from south park when he was in big trouble with the Deflategate. At first, before he. Before he ended up being right. But he came out with a. He was dressed like a 12 year old. He had the ski cap on and did the press conference like, come on guys, why would you think this about me? And he did this innocent fella act.

[Guest]

I'll answer all your questions.

[Brett]

I don't understand what's going on around here. And he was just, wow, you guys are just really. Geez, golly gosh. I don't understand what the. You're pointing fingers at me. And then you'd hear in the back.

[Guest]

Tommy would never see people believe in me.

[Brett]

Here's the guy in the ski cap. Looks kind of adorable. Maybe we should lay off. For the love of the game. Yeah. Tommy. He is kind of a bad guy. A Disney villain. The accusation doesn't even exist. I'm the only one making a full on accusation. Other people are saying this might be a conflict. That looks a little strange. No other owners in football sit in the coach's booth. Jerry Jones dabbles in things he shouldn't, but he doesn't sit down with the coach's booth. Remember when it used to be a problem when your own owner would go down on your sideline. Get away from the coat. Get out of this. Everybody thought it was crazy. Jerry Jones changed that. You don't want your owners hobnobbing around with the dude. Now they're all down pushing the buttons. A lot of them are.

[Co-host]

They wait. But most of them, if they're winning the game. You know what?

[Brett]

You never see Jerry in the other team's booth. Wouldn't happen. But there's Tommy. Tommy would never.

[Co-host]

But you.

[Brett]

You don't trust the world. And that's what he's saying. The world is kind of a dangerous place. There's no reason to trust the world. But me. I'm. I'm my own world.

[Co-host]

He can't do anything. He's just got 5%.

[Brett]

Yeah. I can't possibly. This is not. This is not the behavior of a man like me. Ethical and moral. You've been surrounded by the least ethical and least moral stuff in football history. You were at the pit. You were at the crux of the most crooked thing I've ever seen in pro sports in my life with those tapes. And the NFL just said, burn the tapes. We never want to revisit this again. And they did. Because they didn't want the Italians to kill everyone for robbing them with fake gambling. That's exactly what would happen. You know, you want to know the reason why we gamble now? And it's okay. Other than the finances, because it was an appeasement to the NFL, was like, we'll never have a team in Las Vegas. There's too many opportunities to sully the great nature of this game. And then like, whoops. Well, we robbed the Italians for about six years with that Patriots scandal. And we weren't on the. And we lied about it. And then we burned the tapes. Maybe we should just let them have gambling. And they gave it to us. Put a team right there in Vegas.

[Co-host]

They get a vig from all the gambling sites.

[Brett]

Oh, yeah, they got in on it.

[Host]

No, I don't know.

[Brett]

Come on, Patrick. I agree with what Patrick just emailed. Tom Brady is a textbook high functioning sociopath. I agree. He's. He's Patrick Bateman. I don't trust him because there's, you know, once. I'll forgive you seven, eight, nine times of being involved in something crooked. And see, I'm just asking questions like, this dude's done this before. If you've had a dude steal your wallet and like five times, you're like, he's stolen wallets. And they. But, you know, somehow or another got my wallet back. It wasn't the same wallet, but he got my wallet back. And then there's Tom hanging around behind you. Hey, guys, like, don't stand behind me anymore, Brady, like, why? You steal wallets. That's why. Oh, I've never been actually prosecuted for that. Yeah, but you've always been around wallet theft.

[Host]

On the flip side, though, they keep allowing it to happen.

[Brett]

Exactly.

[Host]

So who's the smart one again?

[Brett]

Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy's Teflon Tommy is Teflon.

[Host]

Teflon Tommy.

[Brett]

But if you're like, I know you haven't been caught doing it, but you've been around it too much. Don't stand behind me. That's all I'm saying. Don't stand behind me. You steal wallets. I don't. All right, well, you've been around wallet theft a lot. If Brett, suddenly the truth emerged.

[Host]

What?

[Brett]

And you're like, hey, Brett, you know what you shouldn't do? Hang around the carpet store and pick up rolls of carpet because, like, you've got a rep. And Brett would say, hey, never been caught. Yeah. Tune around it a lot. Probably the.

[Co-host]

Probably at the Home Depot on the west side. Isn't there one closer to where you live?

[Brett]

He's an interior decorator. I've been to his house. It wasn't that nice.

[Host]

Fine Barons.

[Brett]

Yeah, the people who know. Loved that. Also off on time. I'm just going to keep your. Keep your antenna up, that's all. I might be wrong, but I'm. He's around it again. Something. He's always flirting with stuff that's like, well, this isn't kosher, is it?

[Host]

Sean Rockefeller makes a good point. Goes, only my Raiders would clearly cheat and still manage to lose again.

[Brett]

How about the Raiders falling for the wizardry of Tom Brady, the dude who cheated them wasn't his fault, but cheated him out of going to the AFC championship game in 2001 with a tuck rule. And now he's your. That's a double agent. That's like. That's like trading Brittney Griner for the Merchant of Death and then saying, and you can also have a house in Tennessee. Merchant of Death. He's like, oh, thank you. America is letting me live there. Now. This is pretty cool, but if we bring him on the Enemy championship look, I would. I would possibly go ballistic if Tom Brady was 5% minority owner in the Steelers. I would not be comfortable with that at all. I'd be like, why is he here? Why is he here? It's not right. The dude who banged your wife for years before you, that she's still like, I always loved him. We just didn't work out. He's just. And suddenly he's, like, sleeping over on weekends as a guest. I have to stay in Phoenix every weekend. Do you mind if I live at your house? I'm like, a little bit. I do. Come on. That's all behind us. I don't think you should be here. I'm not saying you're doing anything, but I don't think you should be here.

[Host]

Tommy's got plenty of places to stay.

[Brett]

Tommy can bang any girl he wants. Not your wife. Tommy would never. Tom had a baby with a famous woman and just gonna say left, it's like, I'm done with you. I like this hotter one here. He upgraded in the middle of a pregnancy. Nobody cares. And the one he left was hot. And he left for a woman that looks a little like me in a wig. Scares me. Giselle's nose and my nose aren't different. And she's got better cans. Granted, he's moved on. Bridget was a bitch. Tommy moved on anyway. And I do like Brady brought up that squirrel a couple days ago in San Francisco that's trying to kill People, Yeah, two ladies. So it's all over the news. And I watched a thing last night, and they interviewed Brett's friend. I don't know, but it was on the thing. And the guy's like, that's. I don't know where they found him in San Francisco. This dude does that guy. That squirrel jumps out and gets me. He's got another thing coming. I'll kill that thing with my bare hands. This guy was going to be. I swear, there isn't a person on the planet alive. If a squirrel jumped out of a tree, you wouldn't squeal and piss all over yourself. That's got to be the scariest thing that you know. A bee gets in big guys like, ah.

[Co-host]

So fast.

[Brett]

A squirrel shoots out of a tree and hits you, you're not duking it out. You're screaming, dribbling pee, and everyone's going to laugh at you. And before you even know what happened, the squirrel's gone. Did that squirrel just punch me in the nose? He got another incoming. I'm gonna kick that squirrel's ass. A squirrel leaping out of a tree might be the scariest thing in the world. Two people have gone to the emergency room.

[Co-host]

I flip out when one lady start on its legs. Well, she started on her legs and then.

[Brett]

Then it went. It went crazy. Now it's jumping out of trees at people.

[Co-host]

And I could see your hand, your head just shaking because, like, this behavior probably happened because people are feeding.

[Brett]

The Bradys of the world decided woodland.

[Guest]

Creatures want to be our friends.

[Co-host]

No, I'm like, they're not feeding them right.

[Brett]

They're feeding them, which isn't right. They.

[Guest]

They're dying to be our friends.

[Brett]

No, they're, They're. They have rabies. They're rats with tails. And you want to give them peanuts because you think it's cute how they use their little hands. But inside there, they're looking at you like, if they had the chance, they. They'd eat your jugular. And this one's starting it. I watched this dude. Big dude, too. White T shirt and squirrel jumps out at me. It's the way I treat the queers over there here in San Francisco. I'm fighting them up.

[Guest]

Yeah, I chuck them.

[Brett]

I chuck them down a hill. It's a very hilly town. What am I doing here? I'm a huge fan of the Pelosi's. Like, he just didn't fit. And they found him somewhere down there in Haight Ashbury. I got these queers and these hippies all over this town, they're taking dumps and stuff. I'll take them down, too. That squirrel comes at me, forget about it. You better get your cameras rolling. Get your popcorn ready, cuz I'm gonna kick that squirrel's ass.

[Co-host]

There he is in the park. There's a shredded envelope.

[Brett]

Oh, my God. Come out, come out, wherever you are, squirrel. The squirrels even like, what's he doing here? Then you just hear from the treetops, are you gay? Oh, Dems fight. Where are you, squirrel?

[Guest]

Why are you here?

[Brett]

I got transferred. I live in San Francisco now. It's my own hell.

[Co-host]

Describe this squirrel.

[Host]

Safe place. Nobody's looking for him there.

[Brett]

No one is going to look for me here.

[Co-host]

What the squirrel look like? Yeah, well, it had yellow sunglasses.

[Brett]

I didn't see nothing. All I know is if it comes after me, it better pack a lunch. And he's badass. On the squirrel, I'm like, nobody. No one. Toughest guy in the world. Deontay Wilder. Tyson Fury, Canelo Alvarez. Anybody. Conor McGregor. Jon Bones Jones. That squirrel jumps on him, you're going to hear, and pee's going to dribble out of him. What was that? What was that? You ever have a. You ever see somebody when one of those carpenter bees bumps into them?

[Co-host]

They freak out.

[Brett]

It's like ricin touched someone. Those things, they get me because they don't. They don't move normal. But those carpenter bees, and they're huge and. Pterodactyls. Yeah, but they're stealth. You don't see them till they're, like, right next to you and you hear and they hit you like a rubber ball.

[Co-host]

Football helmets out of whatever they're designed because they can take some hits.

[Brett]

On my bike. I swear to you. I rode my bike once and I saw it and it did that weird helicopter hover those things do. And then it was gone. And then it came back and I just felt this spongy off my face. That's all. You heard through the thing. I was losing my mind. I didn't know what it was. I thought I got beanbags. Not like that. You know what I mean? Although I don't know which I'd rather had Holmberg's morning sickness. If you get spontaneously beanbagged and you don't see it coming, you are asking for it. And it's probably Tom Brady. Yeah. So this squirrel that jumps out, I want to hear tough guys talking about the squirrel and what they do to it. You do what every other human being would do. You'd piss yourself Just a little dribble. It would be a good dribble. Be enough to make a mark and. And you'd. And you'd probably hit the ground crying like the time I thought I'd badass. I thought that was a dog toy. I picked up what I thought was a dog toy in my backyard. It was pink and pink and the white rope braided with the pink. But the white had turned kind of brown because it was dirty and it was sitting in a thing. And I went and reached down to pick it up and it slithered out of my hand. And my reaction wasn't like, oh, snake. I better. I just went, oh. And I laid down on the ground. I didn't have any body juice left at all. I just laid on the ground where the snake was. I didn't know what kind of snake it was. Is it poisonous? Whatever. When it left, when the rope that I thought I was picking. It's like when you drink tea and you think it's Coke and you take that sip and you're like. And you'd spot. Try picking up what you think is a dog rope and it leaves your hand and you get that weak kid cry. You get mall legs. I hit. I laid down.

[Co-host]

You woke up zip tied.

[Brett]

I wasn't asleep. I was just too weak to stand. What was that? And then I kind of scrambled to my feet and said, that's a snake. And I left and I went to the Internet and I started looking and evidently that's okay. We name it was like some sort of. It's a friendly, nice snake. You still don't want to pick up a snake when you don't know you're picking up a snake. If you reach for your toothbrush and a snake is in your hands, you're going to. And you're just going to lay on the ground for a minute. It doesn't matter if it's a worm. If you reached for something and a worm was in your hand.

[Co-host]

Nightcrawler.

[Brett]

Your body reacts so much less tough than you think it will when it comes to that stuff. Woodland creatures leaping out of trees in San Francisco.

[Co-host]

Cute.

[Host]

Here come the furries.

[Brett]

Yeah, they don't think you should be leaping from the trees anymore. Bullwinkle.

[Guest]

Ah, screw you. I'm pounding the face of these gays.

[Brett]

He's anti homosexual. The Rocky is. He's from a different time.

[Guest]

Take that, homos.

[Brett]

And he's just leaping out of trees, bashing into people in San Francisco. Look, it's the flying squirrel. Do you think he's gonna. He hit me in the face.

[Guest]

Take that queer bait.

[Brett]

He doesn't like these homos hitting the homosexuals. Rocky, you're giving us the reputation.

[Guest]

I never cared for it. The world's going to hell in a hand basketball winkle.

[Brett]

You should be more accepting, Rocky.

[Guest]

I'm hitting every last one of them.

[Brett]

Rocky, the Flying Squirrel has definitely got some problems, but. Yeah, you would not. You'd not be taught.

[Co-host]

Mere woods has a rash of homophobic squirrels.

[Brett]

They've had it with these liberal policies.

[Guest]

I hate this city. Used to be something. Now everybody's taking on the road.

[Brett]

I sometimes in the road.

[Guest]

Yeah, but you're a moose.

[Brett]

That's true.

[Guest]

They're people. They're supposed to be above it. I'm gonna smash him in the nose.

[Brett]

You've got a dead drinking rock.

[Guest]

Ah, you Bullwinkle. I'm crushing some gays today. I don't care what happens to me.

[Brett]

You know, I'm directly associated with you. It's the Rocky and Bullwinkle show.

[Guest]

Ah, you, you oversized horse.

[Host]

It's like Brady the Tap dragon.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[Guest]

I'm going to the tap dragon.

[Brett]

Oh, not again. He's gonna come home and hit me.

[Guest]

You know it. You keep your mouth shut, you stupid zebra.

[Brett]

Oh, now he's misgendering me.

[Guest]

San Francisco sucks.

[Brett]

But yeah, they've got a picture of the squirrel too. Flying at people. Not like he's doing it like that. That's the. Have you seen that? The attack squirrel posters, they've got. They got a picture of him like in full flight with his eyes like right at you. He's gonna kill you. It's great.

[Guest]

Remember when you used to walk the streets? You didn't see two dudes holding hands. It was a better time.

[Brett]

Love is pretty. Isn't it wonderful that they all.

[Guest]

Why don't you take your big moose, shove it in another moose then, you queer moose.

[Brett]

Oh, he treacherously drunk again. I also wanted to talk about something that I don't think we should celebrate. And they're making it a big celebration. Alyssa Milano holds a special place in my heart because as a 12 year old boy I realized she was my age on who's the Boss? And a massive crush developed. Like I had a chance. Because when you're 12, you think the people on TV may somehow or another see you too. So I liked her a lot. Then she grew into an absolute stunner. When she put the. Remember?

[Host]

Oh, yeah.

[Brett]

Oh, when she did the additions.

[Host]

Was that poison Ivy?

[Brett]

Poison ivy floor, Whatever. And then she did that one with that the Golden Child girl. And she had a lesbian scene with her classic gem there. And she started to show us those cans, and now she's. She's 52 and she's decided that she's taken those out and she's saying that she's liberating herself from the thing that made her let go of the body.

[Co-host]

That was sexualized, abused.

[Brett]

Yeah, I'm letting go the body that was sexualized and abused by.

[Co-host]

But let me show you my authentic self.

[Brett]

When in the world were you going to take responsibility for allowing it to be sexualized and abused?

[Co-host]

Yeah, I mean, the pictures that they're showing in the article that I show, you know, were. She's definitely displaying them.

[Brett]

Oh, Mr. Skin has her as like a five star. She was solid there. She did a few of them. Like, I. I understand that you're. And then she says, and I'm also liberating my daughter from ever feeling like she has to be. This is the standard of beauty. And I'm like, you're 52. You've never needed these more in your life. This, like, go to. Go get new ones. That's the thing you should be talking about.

[Co-host]

Don't tell Bella. She doesn't need Jug.

[Brett]

Bella, look, let her make her own decisions. You did. If Bella decides that she wants to go out and put some cans in so people like her more, that's a good thing. It's up to your brain to wrap around the idea that people liked you more when you had cans. Maybe that's your personality's problem because you turned into kind of a raging C word for a little while and even your boobs couldn't overcome it. But if you think people liked you just because of your breasts, it's because you didn't develop a personality. And now you're 52 and you're mad at the world for you only. Like me for my.

[Guest]

My final.

[Brett]

Take him out. Like, now you're left with nothing. Nothing but your personality. You're gonna get ignored forever here. Nobody's gonna talk to you. You were tolerated for a while. She's still pretty, but she went nuts. And yeah, she had them pulled. And she's like, making it a celebration. And I'm like, huh? There's a certain aspect of being sexualized that's pre too. Yeah. I think women that get mad when women don't have personalities then and. But they're pretty. Get upset when people stop sexualizing them. I. I firmly believe that, like, she liked it through her 20s and 30s. She got paid for it and everything else. She. She led with it. She knew she was pretty. She was on that show, the. The Three Witches Show. I can't remember. Shannon Doherty and Rose McGowan. And she was charmed. That's right. And she was go like, she's gorgeous, but everybody's kind of like, alyssa Milano's a little bit off.

[Host]

Well, give all that money back then.

[Brett]

Well, fine. No, keep the money. But don't say that we sexualized you when you presented it that way. And we're like, she's pretty. All we were saying was you were pretty. And yes. Did we tug it every once in a while to your naked scenes by design? Yes, we did, and so did you. But when you turn 50 and you're like, now no one likes me for my boobs, they get mad and they start blaming the boobs when they should be. Blaming their lack of personality skills, their lack of social skills, that you're realizing that people only like me for my. I'll show them. It's like, this is why we only liked you for your. Because you have that whole I'll show them mentality. We like boobs. That's. It's a good thing. Don't get mad at us for knowing.

[Guest]

That men like only breasts.

[Brett]

Yeah, that's awesome. Do you know what men would do if we found out one thing women loved a lot? We'd go have it surgically implanted, and we'd never complain about it.

[Co-host]

You're gonna need those when you move into the villages.

[Brett]

Yeah, exactly. You got three years till you're an adult living. Nobody's gonna pay attention to you there either, until you put those back. Because right now, they're just scarred, empty water bags. I think it's great if you had a great person. Girls with little boobs and great personalities are sexy. Kate Hudson has no breasts. Sexy when you go and put boo because you didn't develop a personality and you've been hot since you were 12. Like, everybody. You're. I thought, like, she had posters and she was a teen sensation. And then when she turned 20, she's like, I never developed breasts. So she jammed those in there. And people are like, alyssa's back. We didn't know you as a person. But what we got to know wasn't that great. And then. And then you take them out when you need them more than ever. It's an unfair beauty standard. Yeah, but you took full advantage of that, and now you're yelling at us for liking it.

[Host]

That's what I'M saying give the money back. Then if you're so far against it.

[Brett]

Then I'm with Brett. If women said the only time, like in unison, like all men, Democrat, Republican, as long as they're straight. And even some of the gay ones think breasts are great. And if women said all across the board, all heterosexual women said, what I love is a man with a third nipple on his forehead, there would be a billion dollar industry that started the next day of dudes putting nipples on their heads and never once complaining about, like, I can't believe this is, this is an unfair standard. Oh, it's what they like. We're gonna do that.

[Co-host]

Interesting to see if they, you know, her daughter all of a sudden are natural and they're.

[Brett]

If she gets super chance on her own, she shrink them. Good question. It's a great question. If you're naturally huge, you go get a reduction just to shove it in the face of men. Women find out what men like and they remove it. Men find out what women like and we add it and we never complain. Women find out we like cans, they go out, put cans in. You know, for the last 12 years, women found out dudes kind of like thick asses. Billion dollar industry. And now what are they saying? Sick of you looking at my ass. Like what?

[Co-host]

To the extent they're going to get, they're buying silicone at Home Depot and doing it themselves.

[Brett]

They get liquid nails, liquid nail in their ass. And now they're at a doctor going, I want to remove this. Too many dudes stare at it. I'm like, you think, well, we can't because you're full of Home Depot gear. You got a bucket, a trowel, liquid nail, one of the umbrellas.

[Co-host]

There's a story yesterday, saw a guy in Mexico. The woman lets her boyfriend give daughter 11 year old daughter breast augmentation.

[Brett]

At home. Yeah, in the house. This the stepdad, Sort of just a boyfriend. And he's like, I'll just chop it open and stuff that. How hard can this be? I filled a trash bag before some.

[Host]

3M and just fill it up with the silicone there or what?

[Brett]

Read the side and it says, oh, you can eat this. It doesn't even warn you this will fit in your body. You're good.

[Co-host]

Crushed up some Chiclets. Got them.

[Brett]

Yeah. Got a Ziploc, yellow and blue, made green. You made the bag, you shoved it in. We're good here. Feels pretty good. So long as you don't squeeze too hard and open up that latch. But yeah, I Don't understand that she's taking them out and she's yelling at us like we made her do it. Never made Alyssa Milano put cans in. I was happy she did. Holmberg's morning sickness. But we like boobs and we shouldn't have to apologize for that. And when you take them out and you throw a finger at society saying, you made me put boobs in, what's wrong with you?

[Co-host]

We didn't abuse you.

[Brett]

No, I abused the idea of you regularly.

[Host]

Just needs to chop her hair off and go to title nine.

[Brett]

They'll take her.

[Host]

She's getting to that point.

[Brett]

She is. How are they so mad at us for liking breasts though? This unfair beauty standard? My. It's not that unfair. Don't do it. Yeah, nobody's forcing you. Told you to do it. You wanted to be beautiful. And you know what you did along the way? You let beauty lead and you never developed a fun personality. You're hard to be with. We tolerated you because you had nice cans. You took those out. Now you can go yourself.

[Host]

Samantha.

[Brett]

Samantha, go put your boobs back in. Even Jonathan has nice boobs. They're on my back. We know. Jonathan. Yeah, Mona. Talk her into it. Remember Mona had huge cans on. Who's the boss? The grandma. She was kind of Katherine Hellman. She was kind of slutty about it. It's weird. That's a weird story that she. And she's like, if you read what she's saying that it's all our fault. It's our fault.

[Host]

That's what I'm saying. Chop the hair off.

[Brett]

Yeah, you're not wrong.

[Host]

Outback.

[Brett]

And you're not wrong. You know what she should win. You know what you should get when you get your breasts removed? A free Outback. And she's probably got a guy in her life that's been trying to, you know, be with her for like the ducky in her life. That's for years. He's got a ponytail and he's bald now he's looking at her. He's going, oh, I really like it that you don't have breasts. Now. He's just, he's, he's just got to get in there at all cost. He's got. And he's going to be the one that nails her. Next time we see her, she's going to be with a 62 year old ponytailed guy. And yeah, he's hitting that so hard. Now you gotta call PETA. Finally. Ugh. Now that she made herself wildly unattractive to everybody, I Got in there. But now I gotta deal with her miserable personality. If you're mad at society for having breasts that we liked, something wrong with you. If women across the board said, we love men with size 17ft, it would immediately begin the research on how to enhance your foot size. We would come up with surgeries to appease that immediately.

[Co-host]

And never once I'd just be wearing size 17 shoes.

[Brett]

Yeah, well, yeah, without the surgery, you'd be a stuffer is what you'd be. Yeah, that's right. You'd wear padded bra. That's essentially what that is.

[Co-host]

Come on.

[Brett]

That's how it all look. That's how they start. But I want the authentic foot, man. I'm going out. I want to be able to go on the beach and have people go, those are real. Two fake feet, man. Yeah, I had them enhanced. I don't get it, man. Girls who are fun, great personalities and stuff like that, they can overcome not being up to the beauty standard. But girls that are fun have great personalities and then go get size double Ds put in. They're like, they should be president of stuff because they get it. Why in the world would you take out the thing people liked and then blame them for liking it? You know what men like if a man. Dudes go out and buy cars and houses and stuff to try to impress women. If you pulled up in your, you know, your F1, you got a McLaren, and a girl comes up, goes, nice car. Yeah, it is. Can I have a ride? Sure. Wait a minute. Do you only like me because of my car? I don't know you that well. You know what? I'm gonna crash it into a wall and buy a Hyundai. You either love me or you don't. The girl be like, he's insane. Peace out. What's wrong with him? If he had a personality, I'd like him because of his car and his personality. We got mad. Yeah. Why did I buy this car? Unfair car. Beauty standards. I'm pushing it into a wall. You, society. And I'm gonna drive this Yugo around until somebody loves me. Well, good luck with that. Idiots took her boobs out and yelled at me. I've been on your team.

[Co-host]

Just a McLaren.

[Brett]

Yeah. Get over it. It's a McLaren. You know, I got a lot more to offer than just the car. All right, well, then start showing that and quit yelling at me. You just, like, because of the car. Get out. Like, no, I'm. You were gonna get laid. The car was just the. The key to the door that you had to open. Now you got to do some work.

[Co-host]

That's not the recognition I'm looking for.

[Brett]

I want that recognition. I just want the car to be the car. If I didn't have this car, would you? No man has ever asked a woman that. If I didn't have all this money, would you still love me? We don't care. We gotcha. You never. You never get mad at the fish who bit the wrong bait. Wait, I was using worms. I'm not supposed to catch you. I was going for trout and a bass gun. You're not supposed to be. You only like me for the bait. Yes, the bait is on purpose.

[Co-host]

For years, I was abused in my Bentley.

[Brett]

People looking at me going, he's a Bentley driver. And I'm like, I'm more than that. Why don't you see it? Dudes would be like, whatever got me in the door. I love it. Chicks crash the car and come back with a bicycle and say, now, do you like me? I'm like, no, you're crazy. You've lost your mind. Unfair beauty standards.

[Guest]

You made me put breasts in, and you made me beautiful, and now I'm taking it away.

[Brett]

All right, you better start being able to tell some jokes and stories and stuff, because people aren't gonna like you. David said, even Big Mike put cans in to appeal to Barack. I don't know if that's true. Did she have augmentation? Stop it. Yes, he did.

[Host]

I mean, yeah, she did.

[Brett]

I'm not guilty for liking your huge cans, Alyssa. Sorry. You made some money off of it. Maybe you weren't that great an actress. Now, in hindsight, you weren't getting a lot of roles, and you were still willing to show your cans. Maybe your skill level was low. Should have worked harder. I say if you're the. She's a Marvin Harrison Jr. Of entertainment.

[Host]

If you made it into the Poison Ivy series, your career wasn't that great without your cans. Call it what it is.

[Brett]

You were in the first two, right?

[Host]

Well, she was in number two.

[Brett]

Was it two? Yeah. Jamie Pressley was three.

[Host]

Yeah, she was three.

[Brett]

Jamie Presley was just like, I have got to show people my. Right. Yeah, she loved showing them.

[Host]

She's like the Jane Mansfield. Like, I'm leading with these.

[Brett]

This is what I got, what I'm doing. You're gonna like me for this. And then. And then she was charming and funny and fun, and she had a sense of humor. And Jamie Presley was more than just the body. And she didn't have fake ones.

[Host]

No.

[Brett]

She just Went out there and said, here it is, and it's pretty great. You're like, we do like that. What else you got? She goes, I'm also funny and I'm fun and I got a sense of humor and a wink and a nod. And I know why you like me. I'm like your Marion material. Alyssa Milan is like, what are you looking at? My eyes are up here. Like, I don't know. You spent like 20 grand on those. You think somebody could peek at them? I'll show them in movies, but I'm not going to show them to you, you weirdo. All right, check. You tell me right now, ladies, what you like in a man. And you say, all us girls have talked. You could get us to do it. I like a dong hanging off of a chest. If you talk to a guy enough about that and get your friends to lie to him, you could run the best jackass movie of all time. If you could talk to a lonely dude and say, a lonely dude would come back with a dong on his chest within a year, I got it off a cadaver. He'd go to Mexico and sell one of them cartel dongs right onto his chest and go back and go, is this what you mean? Oh, my God, he did it. Yeah, he did. Cause we're here to please. We're loyal dogs. Chicks are cats. They look at the food you provide and go, why did you give me this? Like, Jesus? Because you got great cans.

[Co-host]

It's their agenda.

[Brett]

Yeah, I don't know what they're doing, but Alyssa Milano is being hailed as a hero for taking her cans out.

[Host]

By who?

[Brett]

By women.

[Host]

Title 9 post.

[Co-host]

The. The post op picture.

[Brett]

Yeah, show us kind of showing them. There.

[Co-host]

Right there.

[Brett]

Well, they're in there.

[Host]

I want it before and after. I want it before.

[Brett]

Well, she. They're not showing them. She's in a hospital. Guy. I know you're a pervert and you're looking at her cans for the last time. So you see the help. But notice, of course, because you're a.

[Co-host]

This was.

[Brett]

Don't cuz it. You did it. Cuz you're a man. You know, you looked at a woman in a hospital gown and said, nice cans.

[Co-host]

Yeah, but I'm. I'm not saying those are way overblown or those are clown or.

[Brett]

She's in a hospital gown.

[Co-host]

Yeah, she looks good.

[Brett]

You looked point made. Brady got half hard looking at a broad in a hospital gown because her boobs kind of poke out of them.

[Co-host]

I feel bad for him. Don't do this?

[Brett]

Yeah, those. Those didn't do anything wrong. They were your meal tickets, sister. You're gonna be playing pickleball with a bunch of old men soon. You want some attention? Be the one with great cans. Why is there never a woman who, like, turns 53 and goes, I'm going bigger. I'm coming up on a time when I'm gonna start losing my looks. I'm gonna get huge ones and then be like, yay. Like, if you applauded everybody, like, yeah, look, she's smart. That's horrible. Why would we make her do that? We're not making her do anything. She's making a life decision that's is really smart.

[Host]

Is she gonna stop at the Botox and stuff, too, or.

[Brett]

Well, you know, sometimes they go too far.

[Co-host]

Well, looking at the. On Monday, seeing that I watched 10 minutes of the Golden Bachelor.

[Brett]

Oh, man.

[Co-host]

Every one of them, 66 years old.

[Brett]

They're bolting. It's bad.

[Host]

Oh, she's getting rough.

[Brett]

She kept it pretty natural, unfortunately.

[Host]

She kept it natural. She says, ran a comb through your hair, sister.

[Brett]

What's the headline? She says, today, I'm free. Like, she had a gun to her head for the last 30 years to keep her cans in. You're right. They look pretty.

[Co-host]

I mean, at the same time, like, if you're having to do it, you have to, you know, re up them maybe.

[Guest]

Like, I just.

[Co-host]

I just don't want to re up them. I'm just gonna.

[Brett]

Yeah, well, don't make a news story out of it. Don't make it some woman's rights. Just take your cans out. We'll notice. We won't notice. Get a personality injected in there. Quit yelling at us at 7:29. What do you got on the big board of musical treats over there, Bert?

[Host]

All right. Wake up Song brought to by Action Ride Shop. And it's supposed to pour the next couple. So now's the time to bring that bike in and get it serviced. Best wrenches in town are, of course, at Action Ride shop in two locations. They got them over there at Gilbert Road and Southern, the OG Store. And while you're in there, you can check out all the new gear that they got. New bike models are out. And of course, you got the. The brand new one right there on power Road and McDowell. It is Action Rideshop. Actionrideshop.com on the list. Parkway Drive glitch for Cardinals fans. I saw red from a warrant Architects seeing red. Kill switch engage. My curse for Cardinals fans and Marvin Harrison.

[Brett]

I feel for you, Cardinal Fans, you know you got 31 other options. Yeah.

[Host]

Demon Hunter, Metallica Prodigy. Smack My up for Marvin Harrison Jr. Wage war fury.

[Brett]

Cardinal fans, you literally have a Baskin Robbins amount of teams to choose from. You can leave this nightmare that you're in. There's 31 other teams. Take a shot somewhere else. This isn't worth it.

[Host]

Hey, Breed I will be heard. Motorhead Heartbreaker for Cardinals fans and White Zombie. Welcome to Planet Mother Effer.

[Brett]

I do like I Saw Red by warrant, but it's not much of a wake up song. Seeing Red, you know, I like the Seeing Red song. Is the Chevelle. What's that one? Yeah, it's the Red. Wanna go with that one?

[Co-host]

Dove Red.

[Brett]

Little Chevelle. The Red. Poor Cardinals. Poor Cardinal.

[Co-host]

They rallied back.

[Brett]

Come on. They dug the hole. They did this with Jake Plummer. Jake Plummer would be terrible for two quarters and then rally back and he's like, they're great. Why can't you do that for four quarters? You dig your own hole and then come back from it and still lose. It doesn't matter. Nuts. Poor bastards. So, Cardinal fans, I feel for you, but I'm fine when the Cardinals lose.

[Co-host]

Especially new when that the last kick didn't get into the zone.

[Brett]

Oh, Starting in the 40, what do you do the last Cardinals. They Cardinals. Cardinals gonna Cardinal. The one thing you can't do is miss that landing zone. Yeah, they start on the four. You got 12 yards here in field goal range. And they won anyway. Poor bastards. And it also has a lot to do with wearing splattered uniforms. I don't know why I have dirty uniforms to start the game. It's the red. It's Chevelle. It's for you Cardinal fans. It's 98 KUPD. It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this.