09-29-25 - BR - MON - It's Natl Coffee Day - Teacher Allowed Student To Feed Ailing Kitten To Snake - Company To Have Drones Follow Shoplifters

Summary

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Holmberg's Morning Sickness

Episode: 09-29-25 - BR - MON - It's Natl Coffee Day - Teacher Allowed Student To Feed Ailing Kitten To Snake - Company To Have Drones Follow Shoplifters
Date: September 29, 2025
Host: John Holmberg, with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness covers a diverse set of topical and provocative stories: from National Coffee Day and Holmberg's annual coffee experiment to controversial education and crime-prevention news (including a teacher feeding a kitten to a snake and the use of drones to track shoplifters). The team delivers their trademark blend of banter, irreverent humor, and candid social commentary, riffing on sports, oddball news, and some wild viral videos.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

Sports Recap and Banter (00:00 - 04:45)

• Holmberg starts by celebrating his favorite NFL team's win, mocking rival teams and their misfortunes, and ribbing co-hosts about their sports allegiances.
• Brief discussion of college football, with joking references to family connections (Rick Neuheisel) and a convoluted cousin relationship.
• The segment is heavy on inside jokes and NFL ribbing.

National Coffee Day: The Annual Coffee Experiment (05:24 - 07:26)

• It's National Coffee Day, and Holmberg recounts his tradition of trying coffee once a year, never enjoying it.
• “It gets worse every time I sip it. I had some yesterday. It's, as my friend John Sharpnick calls it, dude, it's bean juice.” (Holmberg, 05:29)
• Panel discusses how coffee culture is changing—more kids drink it now. Holmberg remains staunchly anti-bean juice, even repulsed by iced coffee.

Brady’s Fun Facts Segment (07:26 - 10:39)

• Richard III’s bones were found after 500+ years thanks to a woman researching a screenplay; the team jokes about “stumbling upon” royal remains.
• Fictional Characters on the Walk of Fame: 20 characters, most recently Batman (2024). Holmberg jokes about “who accepts the star?” and parodies Hollywood sexism.
  • “Should have never let her [Minnie Mouse] in there, huh? Women don't deserve stars. Haha.” (Holmberg, 09:38)
• Sloths vs. Dolphins: Sloths can hold their breath longer due to slow metabolism (up to 40 mins), surprising everyone.
• Record human breath holding: nearly 30 minutes (Tom Cruise cited facetiously).

Quirky News Stories (10:59 - 13:43)

• Rare Orange Lobster Found: Jean Claude the lobster gets rescued, though Holmberg is skeptical about its uniqueness.
• The Deadly Yawn: British woman's forceful yawn dislodged vertebrae, nearly killing her, leading to long-term paralysis but eventual recovery. Mock speculation on whether her husband stayed with her, with Holmberg making bawdy jokes about jaw strength.

Family & Phone Habits (13:43 - 14:40)

• Survey reveals kids (and adults) are glued to their phones during conversations; Holmberg rants about people Googling information mid-talk instead of just admitting ignorance.

True Crime: The Backyard Burial Confession (14:40 - 16:28)

• News story about a man who sent a confession to a news station after his parents' bodies were found buried in the backyard—he admitted euthanizing them and had been collecting their Social Security checks for years. Discussion about his skullet haircut and whether he’ll be safe in jail.

Controversial Classroom Incident: Kitten Fed to Snake (16:32 - 20:26)

• Discussion of a teacher (Randy Brown) reportedly feeding an ailing kitten to a classroom snake. Unclear facts and confusion about the story's actual details spark jokes about journalism standards.
• Ultimately revealed: the teacher gave sick kittens to a student, who then fed one to a snake at home—not actually in front of the class.
• Panel questions why the school has so many sick kittens and why proper procedures weren’t followed.
  • “If you love animals, you don't force feed one to another and get pleasure out of it.” (Holmberg, 18:36)

Drones to Follow Shoplifters: Social and Racial Satire (21:23 - 28:58)

• Company “Flock Safety” is developing drone surveillance for retailers to follow shoplifters—even (allegedly) all the way home.
• Panel skewers the idea as ripe for racial bias and rampant lawsuits.
  • “You can't follow people of color around the Walmart because it's going to cause problems. And imagine when Karen gets followed around the Target. I don't see an upside to the drones in a shopping center at all.” (Holmberg, 27:48)
  • Ongoing, cutting parodies about possible features (“Negro tracker,” “blackest lawyer in Phoenix,” “auto negro”), emphasizing how such technology will spur discrimination and legal battles.
  • References to personal experiences: Holmberg shopping with his Black friend Reggie and being treated with suspicion.

Viral/Bizarre Video Segment (29:29 - 38:55)

• Commentary on a selection of wild, often grotesque or violent clips:
  • Stadium fight gone wrong—guy gets kicked down the seats. (29:41)
  • On-air fitness mishap; fitness instructor drops a news lady. (30:29)
  • Motorcycle crash, ghost-riding bike causes mayhem. (31:30)
  • Rubber bullet incident during a protest. (32:36)
  • Matador runs directly into a bull, is critically injured. (33:16)
  • “Bowling in the hood”: car plows through a group. (34:24)
  • Woman involved in a sexual stunt with a tow hitch. (34:59)
  • Brutal bareknuckle boxing face collapse. (35:54)
  • Car grenade prank, handlebar embedded in cyclist’s body. (36:21 – 37:49)
  • Explicit poolside group sex “video,” described in explicit, comic detail. (38:04)

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Memorable Quotes

• On Coffee:
  • “It gets worse every time I sip it. … it's bean juice. And when you put it that way, it suddenly becomes disgusting.”
    (Holmberg, 05:29)
• On Kitten-Snake Story:
  • “If you love animals, you don't force feed one to another and get pleasure out of it. … there's clearly a winner in that. In my love rankings.”
    (Holmberg, 18:36)
• On Drone Shoplifter Surveillance:
  • “If I'm the black person being followed all the way home, the lawsuit is extraordinary. … that's a major violation of your privacy.”
    (Holmberg, 23:09)
  • “You can't follow people of color around the Walmart because it's going to cause problems. ... I don't see an upside to the drones in a shopping center at all.”
    (Holmberg, 27:48)
  • “I want to apologize to everybody not white because that is the worst thing I've heard in forever. That's. That's wildly racist.”
    (Holmberg, 28:30)
• On Tech Overreach:
  • "Everyone gets followed by a drone at least once. Or every aisle has just a drone going back and forth. ... That's the worst thing I've heard."
    (Holmberg, 22:12, 28:30)

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Timestamps: Important Segments

• 00:00 – 04:45: Sports banter & victory gloating
• 05:24 – 07:26: Coffee Day discussion & annual taste test
• 07:26 – 10:39: Fun facts (Richard III, Walk of Fame, animals holding breath)
• 10:59 – 11:47: Rare orange lobster story
• 12:11 – 13:43: Deadly yawn & personal speculation
• 13:43 – 14:40: Phones and distracted conversations
• 14:40 – 16:28: Backyard burial confession story
• 16:32 – 20:26: Teacher, kitten, and classroom snake controversy
• 21:23 – 28:58: Drones proposed for shoplifter surveillance & racial/social critique
• 29:29 – 38:55: Viral video segment—commentary on fights, accidents, explicit stunts
• 39:49 – 40:48: Further reflection on racism in security and personal anecdotes

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Tone and Style

• Raucous, irreverent, satirical.
• The crew makes pointed social observations wrapped in comedic banter.
• Touchy stories are dissected openly, with both humor and genuine critique, particularly regarding systemic racism and absurd tech solutions.

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Key Takeaways

• Holmberg’s crew uses humor to tackle current, sometimes uncomfortable stories (animal welfare, crime, race, tech), exposing the absurdities and pitfalls of modern society.
• Personal anecdotes bring real-life context to the headlines (especially on the topic of racial profiling and store security).
• The group does not shy away from edgy jokes or commentary, though beneath the surface there's a clear sense of social awareness and critique.

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For listeners who missed the episode:
You’ll get candid sports banter, wild odd news, bold social critique (especially on drones & discrimination), and a signature dose of outrageous humor with a healthy side of self-awareness.

Transcript

[Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP guns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition, and accessories. Still streaming. Homberg's morning sickness [e-mail] Monday's cruising. And you know why that is, Brady? You know why Monday's cruising? It might seem crazy because the Ravens lost and the Steelers won and Lamar Jackson's hamstring hurts. All right, you want to put a little sprinkle of salt on that delicious steak I'm eating. All right. The packers didn't win. And the packers even worse. The packers tied a team coming off losing to the Browns. Oh, my God. It's a good money in the Buckeyes one. Yeah, nobody cares. No one cares about that. Who did they be? Was it a wnb?

[Brady]

Washington.

[Holmberg]

Oh. They had a team that actually was on the road, but it's. Come on, is Washington any good? They're not. They're familiar.

[Brady]

People are picking that the upset of the weekend. Rick, new heist.

[Holmberg]

He used to coach him.

[Brady]

I know.

[Holmberg]

Of course. I let him know. All right, that's great. I'm sure he took that without a.

[Brady]

No, no, no response.

[Holmberg]

It is new number. You randomly text who you believe to be Rick Newhouse. Yeah, they don't.

[Brady]

Ronnie, what number do you have?

[Holmberg]

Give me that. Is there some sort of distant relation there? Right.

[Brady]

They're cousins.

[Holmberg]

Oh, okay. Who's his. So her mom and her mom's brother is Rick's kid.

[Brady]

It's her or.

[Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Grandma and Rick's mom are first cousins.

[Holmberg]

I think her grandma and Rick Neuheisel's mother. Yeah, our first kids. So Ronnie and. Yeah, that's. They're like third or fourth at that point. Then you're not immediate.

[Brady]

But they're. I mean, close enough. I mean.

[Holmberg]

Oh, no. You know, I mean, friendly.

[Brady]

Like there's people that have second cousins that you really don't have much contact.

[Holmberg]

I don't know any of them. I. I don't know that I've ever met a second cousin. I don't even know what it is, but I just know that when grandmas are involved, you're down at least three.

[Brady]

I think it was her grandmother's. Ronnie's grandmother's husband was related to the new Heiselle.

[Holmberg]

What I'm saying is Ronnie and Rick Neuhausel could probably make babies and they'd be fine. We're getting into threes and fours.

[Brady]

That I don't know.

[Holmberg]

Yeah. But when you got grandma and Grandma's cousin is the mother Of New Heisel, you're looking at least two right there. Yeah, they're at third cousins by the time you even get to Ronnie, because there had to be a third party involved after that because grandma had a kid and that kid had Ronnie. So now you're like, yeah, that's third or fourth. So they could have babies. I'm just text him real quick and go, do you realize you could have babies with my wife and see what he said? Yeah, yeah. Stop. First things first. Let's get to the important stuff. Ohio State's going to beat Washington. Second, you could have babies with my wife. So I need you to pull back a little bit there, buddy. Nobody was calling Washington to beat Ohio State for real.

[Brady]

Well, other than Rick, which it wasn't a bad point.

[Holmberg]

Real football got played yesterday. Lamar was crying and sad. Derek Henry has like seven carries.

[Brady]

Don't mess with a hammy. Oh, that could be trouble.

[Holmberg]

I might not play next week. And they'll be one and four. You're gonna. You're literally gonna hear me, and that's gonna come right out of my urethra. Why long if you feel like a room without a roof, It's a good Monday. Victory Monday. What's my shirt say? Brady. Victory Monday. That's right. Because we're in the midst of one. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report is brought to you by our [e-mail] the weather was glorious after the biblical storms we had up till Saturday. I had thought it was all over there. Saturday afternoon I went out and squeegeed off the patio and got everything ready to go for Sunday morning super game because it's starting early. So start the day before. Get that cleared out. I was going to have people slumber over at the house. Steeler fans, we get up early and watch the game. And then a massive storm rolled through out of nowhere and flooded the whole thing again. Called everybody and said, stay home. I'll see you in the morning. But the weather yesterday was unreasonable.

[Guest/Producer]

Real.

[Holmberg]

And there was a couple of times I was in direct sunlight. I'm like, nah, I need that. All pro shade. This is a good thing. I don't have a plan for where I want it, but I know where I want it. So I'm going to give them a ring. All Prochet.com is where you go to take that area you love in your backyard, but sometimes gets a little direct sunny. If you're moving umbrellas you don't have to do that anymore. And I was doing that yesterday, scooching umbrellas around to get sunlight out of my eyes as a perfect thing. But God, what a day. All pro shade can take that space in your house and make an outdoor space, just like an indoor space. While we creep into the most beautiful time of year here in the valley, which is fall. Here we go. Allproche.com. they'll get you there. Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix.

[Holmberg]

Hello, world. Hi.

[Brady]

Happy National Coffee Day.

[Holmberg]

Okay, I gave a coffee another try yesterday, as has been my tradition once a year since I was told years ago by a group of people at a table at dinner that once you turn 45, you're going to just start liking coffee. Well, so far, no good. It gets worse every time I sip it. I had some yesterday. It's, as my friend John Sharpnick calls it, dude, it's bean juice. And when you put it that way, it suddenly becomes disgusting, Elliot, to say that. Bean juice, delicious bean juice.

[Brady]

Do coffee commercials.

[Holmberg]

Juan Valdez is on the mountain now getting those beans, squeezing out bean juice. It's gross. It's bitter. It's hot. First of all, it's hot. I don't know if anybody told you that coffee is. It's hot. That took me by surprise. I'm like, oh, we live in the desert. Why am I pouring scalding hot?

[Brady]

You can ice it up.

[Holmberg]

Is it coffee still or is it iced tea with the worst flavor ever? So it's hot and then you drink that and you realize, I just poured scalding hot lava into my body while it's already hot out. Like, that's no good. So I'm not understanding. I. You know, everybody can go get your own, do your thing. But I was told after 40, Brett, you started drinking it. Were you one of the guys that started later in life that started with the coffee, or did you always drink it? Probably my late 20s, I think. Okay, but there's. There's kids out there that sit there and drink with their parents. It's totally different now. Yeah, but you.

[Guest/Producer]

I was late 20s.

[Holmberg]

Your late 20s?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Holmberg]

Most people who didn't like it. You don't like it either. You don't?

[Brady]

Yeah, no, no. But I probably. I have to disguise it.

[Holmberg]

You have to make a milkshake out of it. Yeah. Yeah. And that's just a milkshake. That's not coffee. I like the smell of the beans, but bean juice. Bean juice. The banquet bean.

[Brady]

Got a couple of basis fun facts suck.

[Holmberg]

The Bean juice, mijo. Thanks, Sam.

[Brady]

King Richard III's bones weren't found in England. They were found in England more than five centuries after he died.

[Holmberg]

Wait a minute. This story has two. Is this a dragon's lair? Do I get to choose?

[Brady]

Richard III's bones were found in England more than five centuries after he died by a woman named Philippa Langley, who was researching the king for a screenplay she wanted to write. The movie never happened, but there is one about Philippa's discovery. It's called the Lost King. It came out in 2022.

[Holmberg]

How'd she know where to look?

[Brady]

Stumbled upon it. She just started digging randomly.

[Holmberg]

She had those bones the whole time. He just guide that. You look to Jesus for your answer sometimes and they're help me, God. Jesus is not helping.

[Brady]

He helps me all the time.

[Holmberg]

Helps you look pretty stupid. Stumbled upon it. Just say stumbled upon it. Brady. Stumbled upon it. No one else in the history of time had stumbled upon it until then though. Nope.

[Guest/Producer]

The Lord said so.

[Holmberg]

Tell them that that was what I planned. That God's plan to stumble on them bones. And Alison Chains wrote a song about it called Dem Bone.

[Brady]

Oh, God.

[Holmberg]

Good, good, good, good. Ad lib.

[Brady]

There are 20 fictional characters with stars on the Hollywood Walk of Fame. The most recent is Batman.

[Holmberg]

Who took. Who?

[Brady]

He got a star in 2024. Who.

[Holmberg]

Was the celebrating that?

[Brady]

Just the Batman character. The Marvel. You got a star.

[Holmberg]

That's what I'm saying. Who was there to go?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Holmberg]

The reveal, you know, his friends was who was taking the photo? Super friends by the star creators. Was it Christian Bale? Adam west had died at that point. Michael Keaton, George Clooney, Michael Ward. Maybe he's not Batman.

[Guest/Producer]

No.

[Brady]

Yeah, but he's a friend. He could be there.

[Holmberg]

The Joker. No. You've got plenty of good. Yeah. Is the Joker there? If he's there, then the Joker's gotta be.

[Brady]

Mickey mouse was the first in 1978.

[Holmberg]

Huh.

[Brady]

Minnie has one too, but it came 40 years later. 2018.

[Holmberg]

Should have never let her in there, huh? Women don't deserve stars. Haha. Sorry. I got myself. Hey, don't let ladies have stars. Next thing you know, they'll want to vote. Ha ha. What they did. What plan? 19th amendment Mick. Oh my God. Hell in a hand basket. Ha.

[Brady]

There was a. Oh. A sloth can hold its breath longer than a dolphin. Because of their slow metabolism, they can hold their breath up to 40 minutes. A dolphin can hold her breath around 10 minutes. Human.

[Holmberg]

The human record for breath holding.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Holmberg]

Three and a half four minutes. Net scuba thing?

[Brady]

No, it's.

[Holmberg]

Oh, actually they go like 33. I thought it was.

[Brady]

Is it really 29 minutes, 3 seconds.

[Holmberg]

Those deep divers. Yeah, I just thought that was like a six minute haul. That's insane.

[Brady]

Set by Tom Cruise and Mission Impossible.

[Holmberg]

Wow. I didn't see that coming. Sickness. Holmberg's morning sickness. 30 minutes.

[Brady]

There was a rare orange lobster. Guy in upstate New York saw it in a tank, knew it was special. So there's one in around 30 million. Lobsters are orange.

[Holmberg]

They're all orange after you boil them.

[Brady]

He bought it, named it Jean Claude because of the two huge claws.

[Holmberg]

Yeah. Brady's. Brady immediately flew to his house and.

[Brady]

Best friend got in touch with an animal group and they released it back into the ocean. It'll be in another net.

[Holmberg]

Yeah. Somebody will eat it. How many orange. I don't think they're that rare because it's like the fifth one in three. Okay. That's like the fifth one I've heard of in the last three or four years. Yeah. And I'm guessing a lot of the lobstermen just cook them.

[Brady]

Do they taste.

[Holmberg]

The blue one that showed up a couple years ago was rare. That was like turquoise. So they kept that.

[Guest/Producer]

Wasn't that one like old too? So it was giant.

[Holmberg]

Probably had a disease. Like if. If lobsters came up here and said, oh my God, I found a gray one. Human. Right. They'd be like, oh, they wouldn't realize that it's dying of something. They'd think it was just some weird find.

[Brady]

Got a 36 year old woman in England named Haley Black. She recently shared a story on Tick tock on how a big yawn almost ended her law life. She was about to feed her baby when the kid yawned. And yawns are contagious. Contagious. So she yawned too. And while stretching as she's yawning, she immediately felt a shock in her neck. Turned out the yawn was so forceful two vertebrae in her neck had shot forward into her spine.

[Holmberg]

Oh my God.

[Brady]

Her spinal cord got so compressed she was paralyzed for a while. The doctor said there was a 50, 50 chance she'd even survive. But she's still with us.

[Holmberg]

I bet she doesn't have a husband. Did it say?

[Brady]

Well, didn't say.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, I think it's just assumed, I mean assume that she doesn't have a husband. And here's why.

[Brady]

She was in a wheelchair for months. Had to learn how to walk again. She still has issues almost 10 years later. This happened in 2016.

[Holmberg]

She she didn't have a husband because just opening her mouth to yawn nearly broke her in half. So she wasn't doing her job. That guy had long left. If your spine shoots out of your mouth just when you yawn, you gotta work the jaw a little bit better. Or she has a husband and his penis is so small that she can't open her mouth. She's so used to not opening her mouth. That's actually a good woman. She kept her mouth closed for so many years, that yawn almost killed her.

[Brady]

In a new survey showed that the average kid is holding a phone 52% of the time when their parents are trying to have a conversation with them. It's not just kids, but parents say, their partners holding their phone 58% of the time they're talking with them.

[Holmberg]

I'd rather have you hold the phone while we're talking than reach for it.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, that's.

[Holmberg]

There's nothing worse than people reaching for their phone because a, they don't, they don't have any knowledge of what you're talking about most of the time. So they're going to go try to research your conversation real fast and participate rather than just be a human being going, this is all new to me because we can't not know something. You can't hear something. But Brett's telling me a story about cars and I'm like embarrassed at my lack of knowledge. I'll sneak in a phrase that I just learned on the Internet now instead of just going, brett, you know more about this than I do. That's great.

[Brady]

This was in Albany, New York, but a news station was doing a story because they authorities just found two bodies that were buried in a backyard. And just after they finish up the story the first time, they get a two page letter from a guy by the name of Lorenz Krause, said, I did the killing. I killed, I killed my parents, man. The parents were German, so they weren't real close to the neighbors. The neighbors just figured they moved back to Germany. But Social Security payments kept coming years after they were. All right. Well, it ends up the sun collecting the dough, collecting the dough. And he, they said, would you like to come down for the interview? Yeah. Showed up at the news station and they. On the spot, the guy takes the interview live.

[Holmberg]

Wow.

[Brady]

And they got that. Yeah. And he said, you know, his parents were, you know, I think the father was 93 and he's like, they were ready to go. So he kind of euthanized him, basically.

[Holmberg]

And how long was he collecting checks on a 93 year old before. Didn't Elon and Donald find this one?

[Brady]

53 years old. There's the dude.

[Holmberg]

We have the video of him admitting it.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Holmberg]

When did he kill him?

[Brady]

Doesn't have the year on this.

[Holmberg]

Got a skullet going on.

[Brady]

Yeah, he's 53 years old.

[Holmberg]

Never, never trust a skull. At least he'll be safe in jail because nobody's gonna want the skullet guy.

[Brady]

Yeah, it doesn't say, but it just says they've been collecting the checks. They've been sending them out for years.

[Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

We got a, a teacher that's apologizing to the Paris the school because she fed a kitten to this snake.

[Holmberg]

Come on lady, you gotta know better.

[Brady]

So the kitten was sick to begin with and it wasn't gonna survive. And so she's like, well, there's vets.

[Holmberg]

You know, you take it to a doctor, it's not going to survive the way you're doing it.

[Brady]

Definitely. According to her, there was no chance for the cat. But I might as well use it as an example.

[Holmberg]

Sure.

[Brady]

So she apologized. They're looking into it, whether or not they're going to say, all right, you're done here. How old are the kids?

[Holmberg]

Yes.

[Brady]

To elementary school.

[Holmberg]

Are there any details in your stories at all today? You're very confused. I didn't include the years or the people's names or events. Nothing. No, she's an elementary. Maybe she did it for the whole elementary school.

[Brady]

To a snake in front of her students?

[Holmberg]

It doesn't say she taught a grade. It doesn't start with second grade. Teacher is. That'd be writing. No, just says a teacher. Huh. What's her name?

[Brady]

Randy Brown.

[Holmberg]

There it is. Google teacher Randy Brown. And let's see how old the kids were by the way. You can't do that to anybody. You can't do that at work. You can't do that in high school. College, maybe college in a certain science class. But you can't take a cat and just say this one's not gonna make it. You take it to the vet, you don't feed it to a snake.

[Guest/Producer]

It says, sorry, Randy Brown High School.

[Holmberg]

She was a superintendent.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, but they won't release teacher at Alvord High School. Oh, experienced educator and animal lover.

[Holmberg]

Well, not all animals. Kittens that she like with the sniffles are going in a snake. If you love animals, you don't force feed one to another and get pleasure out of it because that way that's proof to me you love one more than Another. If I'm willing to feed one animal to another animal, there's clearly a winner in that. In my love rankings. You're still staring at that page. He's going to find it. He's going to find something. He's going to find some sort of info.

[Guest/Producer]

This story says the teacher, described as an experienced educator, acknowledged her decision to the class and allowed a student with parental consent to take the remaining ailing kittens home. And then one of the. That students fed. Fed one of the kids.

[Holmberg]

Time out. Oh, so it wasn't in front of the school. She gave a bunch of dying kittens to a student to feed snake at home. That's a totally different story. However, also, what's she doing with so many sick kittens?

[Guest/Producer]

The ailing kittens taken home by the student later died.

[Holmberg]

The student died.

[Guest/Producer]

No, no, the ailing kittens.

[Holmberg]

Student to the snake. If he can't make it.

[Brady]

The headline says teacher apologizes after feeding ailing kitten to a classroom snake. So maybe the kid was watching the snake at home. But that sounds like.

[Holmberg]

I don't know why that would be a thing in the first place. A classroom snake. That seems to be stupid in high school.

[Guest/Producer]

In high school.

[Brady]

Oh, there's.

[Holmberg]

I know there are not in high school.

[Guest/Producer]

Not much in high school.

[Holmberg]

You can't even have like Santa Claus anym in rooms, but you can have classroom snake. What is Britney Spears going to break in and do this the video again right there in front of you? What's with a classroom snake? And you got to feed it every once in a while while the kids are still there and you happen to have a box of starving, dying kittens.

[Brady]

I think Kirby's, you know, teacher. This was in elementary school. There was the, you know, the class guinea pig, a couple of hamsters.

[Holmberg]

Okay, that's just a weird thing. It's. And if it's not like a animal class, if you're going to mass and the dude's got to feed his animals every once in a while, he's a bit distracted. Classroom snakes probably not a good idea. Especially where did she get all the. I've got too many questions. Yeah, is there any journalism? Where are the kittens coming from? Why is there no vet in this town? Why don't you take the kittens to a vet and go, hey, are they gonna make it? And then, no, they've got dying kittens disease. And we're gonna put them all down humanely. Can I take a couple of them and feed them to my snake? No, you creep. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brady]

This company called Flock Safety provides drones.

[Holmberg]

To police departments for the Ravens. Flock nation.

[Brady]

Ooh, they're gonna need them.

[Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

So they're saying they're going to now provide. They're trying to get clearance to provide drones for stores like Target and other department stores. And they'll. In the shoplifters.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, they'll follow everybody.

[Brady]

Well, no, like, they. They walk out of the store, say.

[Holmberg]

Say what they're really going to do, Brett. Going to follow black people around the store so the black people can't punch the guy following them.

[Brady]

They call the drones flying Hellcats.

[Holmberg]

No, because they'd steal the drones.

[Guest/Producer]

Can I venture a guess?

[Holmberg]

Oh, this is gonna be lost.

[Guest/Producer]

The brand new Queen Creek and Gilbert. Targets aren't having drones.

[Holmberg]

Well, I bet you they do. Here's what they'd have to do to make this work. Everyone gets followed by a drone at least once. Or every aisle has just a drone going back and forth. You cannot just go. You can't hear the words. All right, I'll be right back. Wait in the car. And then you hear like, God damn it. Yeah, never mind. I can't go in there. The planes are out. Don't do that.

[Brady]

Well, the other thing is, they got to figure out, you know, with the faa, because they're drafting new rules because you've got more businesses that are using drones to delivery.

[Holmberg]

Sure.

[Brady]

Now you're going to have a little air traffic.

[Holmberg]

Well, in the target, it shouldn't affect air travel outside. It's not gonna get in the ways of helicopters and stuff. If you're inside target.

[Brady]

Well, no. It follows you. The house. You step out and it follows them. Takes them all the way home.

[Guest/Producer]

There's a little armada at the door outside.

[Holmberg]

You steal something and they don't call the police. It follows you all the way home.

[Brady]

The drone. They'll call the police afterwards.

[Holmberg]

If I'm the black person being followed all the way home. The lawsuit is extraordinary. If I didn't steal anything. Because that's a major violation of your privacy. Second, throw a rock at it.

[Brady]

Yeah. Or see those videos.

[Holmberg]

Yeah. Just shoot it. That's what you're creating here. I can't imagine that they would have. The target would lock on a dude and you gotta fly it. They're not gonna. They're not autopilot. So there's a new feature on drones that, like, Negro tracker that has like, a thing that just like. It just knows to follow one all the way home. This is terrible. I want to become a lawyer. To just reap the benefits of this. I'll be on TV in a heartbeat. Me, Kevin Rowe, Holmberg and Lowe. They handle the accident injury. I'm like black people. This is ridiculous. They won't be in Maryville. They'll be shot out of the sky because that's the one. Patriot missiles. There's no way Brady's right about that. There's no way. They're just like that'll follow you all the way home. Tyrone, make sure that you didn't take anything that they can't do that that's so illegal in every direction.

[Brady]

Follow him for eight hours.

[Holmberg]

What if he lives in Tennessee? Who's flying it behind him? It's not on. It's. Unless it's on Auto Negro. There's a band name. Yeah. I hate this. And I'm white. I can't imagine what it feels like in the African American population to go. Wait a minute. What? Yeah. Drones. Just suspects for. For shoplifting. We're just gonna follow you all the way home now. Really? You think that's happening? I need the blackest lawyer in Phoenix to come with me to that and just pick something up and put it near your pocket. And if that drone even goes we're suing everybody. Yeah. And all you have to do to get away from it this doors open up.

[Brady]

We got one.

[Holmberg]

Ryan's right out. Ryan's right. If you notice that you were at the target and there's a little plane following you afterwards go to the airport and get target in trouble.

[Guest/Producer]

Do we have a Jackie Childs in?

[Holmberg]

Oh, we got Jackie Childs. I would drive directly from the Target on 44th street in Thomas right into air travel. Right into it. I don't know what's going on. This isn't mine. It's just following me around. I got a tan this weekend and now this target drone won't leave me.

[Guest/Producer]

Alone like a lost puppy.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, it follows them around the store. It can't leave. Somebody has to fly it. Unless it's got GPS on blacks only.

[Brady]

The picture they're showing is maybe.

[Holmberg]

No. If it's in the parking lot and it's just floating around out there to follow you to your car so it can identify to tell the police had.

[Guest/Producer]

A blurred out head.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, but it's not following you back to 59th Avenue in Indian school. No way. And I love.

[Guest/Producer]

And that's a Gilbert mom.

[Holmberg]

It's a Gilbert mom.

[Guest/Producer]

There's no way.

[Holmberg]

Come on. The artist rendering. In the artist rendering they used the peach crayon that's that's just to put you off. We all know I was with my friend Reggie at Walmart. I saw it in action. We were in the TV department. We couldn't leave it. Guys, can I help you? Yeah, we're just gonna go pay for this. No, you gotta pay right here. And I looked over, I'm like, it's because of him, isn't it? And the guy's like, what? And I'm like, just let us. We're not done shopping. You can't leave here until you pay for those TVs. Like, we're gonna. Have you seen how big Walmart is? I'm gonna wander for a minute. No, I'm like, it's. It's him, isn't it? And that dude went like pale ghost white. Like, I've been here before with a cart full of TVs and I got to keep shopping. It's because of my opaque friend, isn't it? And Reggie was just like, just pay for the TVs. I'm like, you're right. And I said ironic coming from you. That's irony.

[Brady]

Reggie, is that a drone above us?

[Holmberg]

Yeah. Reggie, why are we being followed by planes? You don't normally get followed by planes. Oh, of course. Yes.

[Guest/Producer]

I mean, yes.

[Holmberg]

I almost let the cat out of the bag. That is the most racist thing I've ever seen or heard of in my life that we're passing office security. But you know how that's going to get abused. You absolutely know how that's going to. The lawsuits ain't that. They should just write that on the.

[Guest/Producer]

That's the name of the.

[Holmberg]

And then the greeter would be like, oh, welcome to Walmart. Thanks for coming in. We got one.

[Brady]

Help yourself to whatever.

[Holmberg]

Wheels up, wheels up.

[Guest/Producer]

You know like a sniper marks the target.

[Holmberg]

Exactly. He does mark the target and the greeters start hugging you and dropping air tags in your pocket. Got it.

[Brady]

Target has a hundred drones in it.

[Holmberg]

If you were. I mean, it's not like. At least sometimes security mall guys are subtle isn't. They'll know. And the worst part is you can't follow people of color around the Walmart because it's going to cause problems. And imagine when Karen gets followed around the target. I don't see an upside to the drones in a shopping center at all. You don't think you're following Talon with an eye and Y around Target or what? No, because he's gonna wreck the drone. He's not dumb.

[Brady]

Especially when you paid for it. I paid for this. It's been following me.

[Holmberg]

Well, before you even check out, if you've got something following you up and down the aisles and you see that pimple faced kid two aisles over with a remote control just eyeballing you with the camera, that's the worst thing I've heard. I want to apologize to everybody not white because that is the worst thing I've heard in forever. That's. That's wildly racist.

[Brady]

Shoplifters could soon be chased by down by drones.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, it's not gonna happen. They can be.

[Brady]

Now they're gonna arm them too.

[Holmberg]

They're just gonna start shooting at anybody. Like, I forgot to pay for this Heath bar.

[Brady]

It'll be like those ones we've seen and that the Ukraine war fusion where they fly over and they just drop the little hand grenade.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, that's. That's going to get abused in a bad way.

[Brady]

I got a couple of Brady videos.

[Holmberg]

This guy says, please create a drone company and name the premium model D Roan. Hey, man, I'm D. Roan. I'm just following my players around.

[Brady]

First one is from the scuffle zone. It's a stadium fight.

[Holmberg]

Oh, this guy. Not a very crowded climb over two rows.

[Guest/Producer]

This is during COVID Oh, it is. Because it's Miami Stadium.

[Holmberg]

It's the Dolphins. Oh, yeah. Everybody's gonna be like three rows apart. Except for that gaggle of whites in that corner. Oh, he's. Oh, that's a bad idea. Good move. He tries to climb up three rows by climbing over the seats. And by the time he gets within kicking distance of the guy he's mad at, he takes one in the chest and goes back downhill. Dude. Yeah. And you're not in exactly the most balanced space. The guy front kicks him right down there. Three rows. Right where he started too. That's the best part. Did he go back? No, that's just repeating. Repeating. I was gonna say. Wouldn't it be great if he didn't? It's just over and over.

[Guest/Producer]

Kept going.

[Brady]

Next one's from Good Day New York. Oh, got the fitness instructor in there.

[Guest/Producer]

Looks a little bit like Adam Ray, by the way.

[Holmberg]

So the guy.

[Brady]

That's who I was.

[Holmberg]

Oh, and then he just throws a lady.

[Brady]

What kind of insurance do you have?

[Holmberg]

I have to tell you, I'm really sorry, lady. I'm not really a fitness guy. Madame Ray, comedian. This is my new character. Sorry about that, bro.

[Brady]

But hey, listen, don't exercise in heels.

[Holmberg]

That's a lesson. Let's. Let's go. Yeah, she's not Doing pull ups, y'. All.

[Brady]

Hold the crossover.

[Holmberg]

Yes. She's just holding the bar while the guy lifts her, crosses her legs. The only workout happening there is the fitness instructor is lifting that news lady up on the bar, and then she can't even stand on the earth without falling down. Holmberg's Morning Sickness, Hol. Morning Sickness 28 KUPD. Holmes, Bloomberg's Morning sickness.

[Brady]

Next one's a motorcycle accident. He gets rammed by the motorcycle in back of him. It's off the bike, and the bike is ghost riding now.

[Holmberg]

Got a motor. The motorcycle has a camera on it. On a gimbal, too. And it's just.

[Brady]

And then this guy.

[Holmberg]

And then it rams into another bike by itself. This bike hates. This bike hates other bikes. That's what it's saying. Oh, man, that guy's leg's broken. Oh, my goodness. That's no good. Yeah, the dude hit him in the back tire. Yeah. And he popped him right off the bike. This thing goes for another five or six hundred yards. Yeah, the camera's on that gimbal. Or is it?

[Brady]

That's where I was trying to figure out the end. I'm like, the cam.

[Guest/Producer]

Those cameras get rid of the gimbal, the pole that it's on.

[Holmberg]

Oh, they do.

[Guest/Producer]

Yeah, they. The software automatically gets.

[Holmberg]

That's neat. That's real. Yeah.

[Guest/Producer]

You can eliminate guys that have it on a long pole. It looks like they're just skateboarding, but they're holding their own camera.

[Holmberg]

No kidding. Why don't they just get one of those D rounds? They will now busy at the target.

[Guest/Producer]

They will now.

[Brady]

Next one's a little quality protesting here. This guy's getting a little cocky.

[Holmberg]

All right. He's talking to a bunch of dudes to the side. Yeah.

[Brady]

Oh, I better.

[Holmberg]

They're chucking some. Better call it. Boom. They're chucking cement blocks. Oh, yeah, the rubber bullet. Yeah. They're chucking cement blocks at the cops who have their big shields up. And this dude's just standing there, a pair of sweats, and then somebody hits him in the balls with a rock. Well, he's being. He's like, waving his wang in their face.

[Guest/Producer]

I think he's Irish.

[Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, that's. That's a rough punch to the nuts with a block. And I like that. The people were on his team that were throwing rocks at the cops, decided to still hit that dude in the nuts.

[Brady]

We got another bullfight video, and this one's charging up like a hellcat.

[Guest/Producer]

This arena has sold out advertising.

[Holmberg]

Look at all those Billboards. A lot of billboards.

[Brady]

So just starts revving up.

[Holmberg]

All right. He's got. He's always kicking. He's doing that bull kick with his legs, and he's about to start running. Oh, man. The matador ran towards him first. And the matador gets within, like, a foot of the bull's face, and he goes right into the matador. Oh, they just drag him out because he's. He's already dead. Oh, my God. That was an absolute disaster.

[Guest/Producer]

By the way, was that D. Roan on the commentary there?

[Holmberg]

I don't know. Charging up. Yeah. Wow. Why? And that's actually. The bull stood still. The dude ran into him. Yeah, the bull took, like, a step.

[Brady]

Yeah. And he took a. Oh, he just got head on.

[Holmberg]

Faced that a bitch.

[Guest/Producer]

Delmar Hamlin.

[Holmberg]

Heart stopped.

[Brady]

What do you think happened to that dude?

[Holmberg]

No kidding, man. Yeah, he just went like. The dude is full blast running towards.

[Guest/Producer]

The bull, dead center punch.

[Holmberg]

That's dumb. All right, Brett, what do you got? All right, it's Monday, so we're a little light, man. Man, how about some bowling in the hood? Okay. We're in Maryvale. We're in the middle of a road. There's. Oh, there's gonna be a lot of cussing in this. There's a lot of people. Oh, and then there's just. People stand and a car just comes and knocks them all down. What all the yelling's about. Oh, here comes. Oh, it's like an ultima just smashes into everyone. And they all popped up.

[Guest/Producer]

Gordon's old Cavalier.

[Holmberg]

They all got right up. That is a resilient group. They took that punch pretty well. All right, here's a lady getting hitched. Oh. Oh, it's a fat lady sitting on the Honda Pilot. And it's a tow hitch. She's putting it in her. She's very naked and her breasts are very long. And the tow hitch is very unlucky. Oh, God, look at it. Just hanging around.

[Guest/Producer]

Hanging around.

[Holmberg]

Just start the car and drive away, please. She's got her boobs all tatted. I know. They got heart tats over her nipples, and they're just gross. Thanks, Brett. That one was tough. Can I watch people getting hit by a bull again? That was gross. Oh, all right. There's a boxing match. This looks like kickboxing. It looks like.

[Guest/Producer]

Oh, I saw that. This one is this bare knuckle boxing.

[Holmberg]

Oh, he just got punched in the face.

[Guest/Producer]

It caved in his entire face.

[Holmberg]

Oh, it just collapsed his nose and his orbital bone. Oh, we Got slow motion. Oh, slow motion. Nose exploding. It mashed his nose into his face. It's. It just disappeared his nose. It turned him into a bad 50s cartoon character.

[Brady]

Did he live?

[Holmberg]

He's not gonna be happy.

[Brady]

I want to follow up.

[Holmberg]

Yeah. All right. There's some guys jacking around. Okay. He's got his wiener out in the car or something? No, no, he's got a grenade in the car. He's in the passenger seat of a car, and he just. No, he's rushing. These people are. Oh. Oh, God. Come on. You gotta be kidding me. I can't. Oh. Okay. Get out. We just pulled it. Sure enough, there's the car after they made it out, right? Yeah, yeah, they made it out.

[Brady]

I thought it was gonna go off.

[Holmberg]

I didn't know that was. That was suspenseful, Brett. I literally started shaking a little bit, like I was. But I'm like, the camera can't make it. All right. Oh, boy.

[Brady]

Foreign object.

[Holmberg]

See an X ray. There's an X ray. Oh, my God. The guy wrote a handle. He put. He went over the handlebars. He went over the handlebars on his bicycle. And the handlebar and the brakes went in his ass. And the X ray shows that the handlebar and the brakes are in his ass. And the brake line. Look, the brake line is all the way out his leg.

[Guest/Producer]

Okay, so did that go in his hip and come out his ass? Because that's what it looks like.

[Holmberg]

There's a lot going on in that X ray because the brake line is out of his thigh. The handlebar's in his ass.

[Brady]

Yeah, that jab through the hip.

[Holmberg]

The break is actually in his thigh.

[Guest/Producer]

Is there a second?

[Holmberg]

Oh, I don't even want to know how that entered him anyway. That went in was bad, actually. Probably would want it in my ass because at least there's a hole there already, right? I think he had several holes invented that day.

[Brady]

Oh, they just kept it in there.

[Holmberg]

All right. I don't know. Yeah. I don't know what this is. We're in a pool. There's a. There's two Gilbert Goons and a girl, I think. And the girl is having normal sex with one of them. And then another guy has his butt in the guy's face and his wiener in the girl's face. And. Oh, now the other guy starts to lick some butt, and there's another dude filming this. They're on vacation, too. That's the crazy part. They're in some sort of villa. Oh, my God. I don't even Know what this is? There's a lot of close friendships that I've never experienced in this video. I've never wanted to get that close to another person. Oh, here's the third guy, comes in, puts a cowboy at. Oh, one of the. Give him his hat. Yeah. One of the other talents needed, his participatory cowboy hat.

[Guest/Producer]

Somebody else is enjoying the pool.

[Holmberg]

All right. Mouth guy's good. Oh, now he's just. Now he's riding the shoulders. I don't know how that's even pleasurable doing this. Oh, because he had a cowboy hat on. That's why he. So he got up on his shoulders, and he's starting to ride. The girl is just taking it all. And now here's an overhead shot. They're still going. Now we're in a more traditional devil's threesome, where the man is working the mouth and the other man is from behind. And that's just how it ends. Well, that was. It turned into love at the end, which is good. We're all here for that nice love weekend. Thanks, Brett. Yeah. You know, you started with scary stuff with that, and then you ended it with a load of love in a pool. And I mean, loads of love drone following people around stores. I. I gotta call Kevin Rowe immediately. Just go cancel all your appointments.

[Guest/Producer]

Start another wing of your office.

[Holmberg]

You're gonna make so much money. There is no arguing that this is all bad. And I can see all of Gilbert going, why is that bad? Well, I'm not going to take anything. I should. Okay. You don't get followed around stores already. I've never seen anything as bad as what I saw that time. Two times. Once with Reggie in a parking lot after. We were at a bar and we didn't want to drive. It was late. And a cop drove by on the street and saw us standing in the parking lot and slammed on his brakes and came back. Everything okay here? I'm fine. And Reggie's like, really? He goes, just making sure you guys are okay. And he's looking right at me. Are you okay? Blank twice. Everything I wanted to do, put my hands up and go, no, I am not.

[Brady]

I believe the Gilbert mom said they can track the loons walking out of the store.

[Holmberg]

Yeah, that's exactly it. And then you get the thing that happened at that Walmart. I'm telling you, when you confront the guy asking you to never leave the section he's patrolling, can Reggie come back to town?

[Guest/Producer]

We can reenact that.

[Holmberg]

So. And Reggie Graham. Reggie was so cool about it. But I'm like, is this thing. Come on, that dude's dead. His eyes on me the whole time. And we started laughing. I'm like, just pick stuff up and then hand it to me and see what he does. We weren't allowed out of the section. I've had people now, if you buy electronics, you can't leave the area. And I'm like, why? It's just a policy we have so there's no theft. And I'm like, hmm. And yet I was here, like 3 days ago buying stuff, and I walked right out. And when I just said, it's him, isn't it? And pointed to red. Oh, no. I hadn't even noticed him. I don't notice color. In fact, I thought that was your shadow. I'm sorry. I didn't even see a man there. I just saw an individual white man with his imaginary friend. I don't even know what's going on. I gotta go home. Drone followed us around. That cart was pretty crazy, though. It had, like, shower curtains, televisions. It was a Walmart shopping experience. It's great, though. There you go. That's your Brady Report, everybody. Watch out for those drones. It's 98K, UPD, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect, 98 Kubt. Wherever you go, whatever they get into, from chill time to everyday adventures, protect your dog from parasites with Cridellio Quattro. For full safety information, side effects and warnings, visit cordelioquattrolabel.com consult your vet or call 1-888-545-5973. Ask your vet for Cordelio Quattro and visit quattrodog.com.