09-30-25 - Merc Mania Is Happening As We Got The Phones To Work So We Can Make One Random Call

Summary

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Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – “Merc Mania Is Happening As We Got The Phones To Work So We Can Make One Random Call”

Date: September 30, 2025
Host(s): John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Show: 98KUPD, Arizona

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Episode Overview

This episode is all about excitement, chaos, and unexpected hilarity as John Holmberg and his crew finally manage to get their studio phones working live on air—just in time for their “Merc Mania” contest. The stakes are sky-high: a $500,000 prize for correctly answering a Phoenix Mercury trivia question. What ensues is vintage Morning Sickness: technical mayhem, brutally honest on-air banter, and a truly random contestant call that delivers more laughs (and nerves) than anyone expected.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Technical Struggles and Anticipation

• John announces that, thanks to Toledo’s efforts, the studio phones might finally be operational.
• The team jokes about their unfamiliarity with the setup, anxiously trying a live, on-air random call as part of “Merc Mania.”
• There is frantic button-pushing, confusion over equipment, and lots of playful ribbing:
  • "Pull up a Westsider." – (A, 01:54)
  • "Just start pushing buttons." – (C, 02:23)

2. The Merc Mania $500,000 Giveaway Call

• After much fumbling, the team successfully dials a random number belonging to Michelle.

• John introduces himself, and after some skeptical back-and-forth, Michelle hesitantly agrees to participate—despite barely believing it’s real.

  Memorable Exchange:

  • John: "If we give you $500,000, would you listen?"
    Michelle: "Maybe." – [04:49]

• Michelle reveals she’s currently unemployed (formerly a house cleaner).

• The big question: Who is the current head coach of the Phoenix Mercury?

  • Michelle doesn’t know, and admits, “I have never watched the game.” – [07:13]

• The 500k remains unwon. John confesses he was barely sure of the answer himself (Nate Tibbets).

3. Candid Banter and Social Commentary

• The crew poke fun at themselves, at Michelle, and at each other throughout, drawing on inside jokes about the “West Side,” unemployment, women’s basketball, and radio listenership.

  Notable Quotes:

  • "So you’re heterosexual?" – John, after Michelle admits never watching a Mercury game [07:14]
  • Michelle: "I do like men." [07:18]
  • "She sounded feminine. I don’t think she played for the team." – John, on whether their caller could have been a Mercury player [16:41]
  • "Unemployed, 623 number, used to be a maid. I mean, come on." – John [15:50]

• The group recognizes the cultural absurdity and deep skepticism people have toward unknown calls and big radio contests.

  • "Nobody answers unknown calls anymore, so you must…" – John, on their luck in getting an answer [07:51]

4. Post-Call Reflection: Nerves, Rules, and ‘Reality Radio’

• John describes his nerves and relief after Michelle fails to answer correctly.

  • "I almost threw up... My tummy still hurts. Damn it." – John [09:02] / [10:03]
  • "I was horrified. Merc Madness. I told you, it’s the most exciting thing that’s gonna happen with the WNBA Finals." – John [13:11]

• The hosts debate the legality, logistics, and cultural shift away from landlines, snarking about technical suggestions from listeners (“Plug a phone into a wall and make it work. Why do I have to do that?” – John, [14:37]).

• Listeners email in with their own jokes and commentary, including calls for John to get a tattoo, and playfully ribbing Michelle.

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Segment Breakdowns & Timestamps

[00:00-02:44] Technical Mayhem & Phone Setup

• The team scrambles to get the phones working live.
• Banter over buttons, plugs, and system confusion.
• "Are we in the middle of Merc Madness, Brady?" – John [02:43]

[02:45-04:49] The Random Call to Michelle

• Michelle, the chosen random caller, answers.
• Suspicion and disbelief from Michelle.
• "If we give you $500,000, would you listen?" – John [04:49]

[04:50-07:55] The Quiz and Michelle’s Responses

• Michelle’s lack of Mercury knowledge is exposed.
• Revealed: She’s never watched a game, didn’t know the coach.
• John and the crew riff on stereotypical “West Side” and unemployment themes.

[07:56-09:38] Relief, Reflection, and More Jokes

• John admits not knowing the answer himself.
• Laughs about the legitimate chance someone could have won.

[09:39-13:54] Behind the Scenes & Listener Feedback

• The crew reads emails: intense listener engagement, nerves, and laughter.
• Commentary on broadcasting rules, live giveaways, and station policies.

[13:55-End (~16:46)] Wrapping Up the Bit

• More quips about the contest, technical advice, and aftermath.
• Acknowledge Michelle’s willingness and humor, tease the next round for $250,000.
• Set up for the next show.

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Classic John Holmberg:
  "I'm going to try to bang Michelle over 500,000." – John, joking about how high the stakes are [05:12]

• Brady’s Sarcasm:
  "Typical west side." – Brady, when Michelle is noncommital about listening for $500,000 [04:52]

• Crew Self-Deprecation:
  "Closed the checkbook out. He was ready to write that check." – [09:58]
  "I've never even heard of Nate Tibbets. I would have guessed." [09:38]

• Listener Feedback:
  "'I'm gay, but I'm not that gay.'" – Sharing a listener's response to the Mercury question [11:11]

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Tone & Takeaways

The episode is fast-paced, irreverent, and loaded with the camaraderie and spontaneous nonsense that defines Holmberg’s Morning Sickness. What begins as a stressful technical ordeal becomes a comedic high-wire act—with hosts and listeners hanging on every word of the $500,000 random call, all while lampooning themselves, their caller, and the absurdity of it all.

Listeners who missed this episode will wish they hadn’t: it’s a prime example of “live” radio’s chaos creating authentic, unforgettable entertainment.

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Upcoming:

• Merc Mania returns next episode, with $250,000 on the line—if they can get the phones working again.

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Transcript

[A]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP guns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[B]

It's John Holmer here from the morning sickness and it's time to talk again about my friends at Trajan Wealth. I always talk to you about the will and trust, the estate plan that I put together with Kent at Trajan Wealth. Kent was unbelievable. And, man, you want to make sure medical power of attorney and power of attorney are established because if something bad happens and you don't have anybody speaking for you, somebody you don't know will keep control of your life even when you're not in control. All you have to do is get it done. Today at Trajan Wealth. 480-990-3300. TRA and Wealth Legal Services are offered through trades and estate law firm LLCs still streaming Hberg's Morning Sickness online at 98kupd.com I'm not. I'm not 100% sure, but I'm kind of thinking Toledo might have just fixed this. We might be in a situation where we've got phones. Toledo fixed it. Well, I don't know. One of my punches or to. Merc mania's back. We've got hope this works. We've been dialing, and it's been working off the air. Merc Mania. Brady, we're still at the $500,000 mark for.

[C]

All right, all right.

[B]

I'm nervous. You should be. I should be. This is insanity. Oh, I don't know if I want to do it now. I think I might not do it.

[C]

The boy delay.

[B]

Well, we could lose. Toledo's got it. He's in the other room fixing something. So we' to we. I haven't dialed anything yet because I want to do this on the air to make it legitimate. You got her? He thinks he's got her. All right, I'm going to let you handle all this. I'll let you do the dialing. 623 starts with a 2, ends with a 9. Right? That's all we need you to do, Rich. So if you can pull this off.

[A]

Pull up a Westsider.

[B]

Where do I find what you're doing on that computer? Here.

[A]

Got the magic jack hooked up or what? I think it's.

[B]

Okay.

[A]

I think it's phones.

[B]

Oh, wait. Come over here.

[C]

Just start pushing buttons.

[B]

I don't know how that button works. Oh, we're using stuff we've never worked. Okay, I think I can fix that. All right, now this is locking me out oh, wait, I can fix that. Hold on. I think I can fix that. Oh, we are in the middle of Merc Madness. Brady.

[C]

So close.

[B]

Brady. Thanks for filling. Stretch. Brady, Stretch. You've been fantastic through this entire endeavor.

[C]

Well, you said stretch, and I've been.

[A]

Give us the original recipe for it.

[C]

I've been doing leg stretches.

[B]

Okay. All right, start to dial in Toledo. Oh, no. Do we have a dial tone at all? You've hit the button. What's going on?

[C]

Oh, come on.

[B]

Oh, no, no, no. I'm going to turn this down. Are these all buttons here? Numbers.

[C]

Give me a ring.

[B]

Are you almost done? Oh, no, Please. But. Busy signal.

[A]

You better call Hopkins.

[C]

How? He's doing it slow. Making sure it goes.

[B]

That was the nine we're on.

[A]

Oh, no.

[C]

I just kind of myself.

[B]

What? Hello? Hello? What the hell?

[D]

Hello?

[B]

Hello. Hi. Thank you for answering. What is your name?

[D]

Michelle.

[B]

Michelle, I'm John Holmberg from 98 Kupds Radio. Are you allowing us to put you on the air? You're on the air live right now, and let me tell you, it's a joke. It's for $500,000, and I wish it was a joke at this point. I was hoping you wouldn't answer. We're randomly calling. Can we put you on live?

[D]

Jeff, stop messing around.

[B]

No, I wish it was whoever she just said. Are you okay with us putting you on the air? Otherwise, we can't do it. And I'm not kidding. It's for 500,000. It's called Merc Mania Mercury or in the finals, Merc Mania.

[E]

It's true.

[B]

You can listen to my friend. Are you familiar with the. You said yes, sure. Okay. All right. Are you familiar with the show? Holmberg's morning sickness, wildly successful 25 years?

[D]

No.

[C]

Okay, well, welcome.

[B]

Welcome to the show. If we give you $500,000, would you listen?

[D]

Maybe.

[B]

Oh, yeah. Thank you.

[A]

Typical west side.

[B]

Yeah, no kidding. You said. Are you all right? We're not even gonna get into how we got us your number. But I just dialed you randomly. Michelle, you said yes, okay? I just dialed you randomly. I'm gonna One question, and I swear to God, $500,000 if you know the answer, because the city is on fire with this. With this particular situation. Oh, my God. My stomach is spinning. Michelle, it's like a lot of. Okay, you don't seem like you believe this. You seem. This is real.

[D]

I don't.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

I don't believe this.

[B]

All right, here we go. It's real. I'm not kidding. Listen. Who Wants to Be a Millionaire music. I wouldn't be playing that if it wasn't real. Okay, we've got $500,000 for you.

[D]

Okay.

[B]

What do you do. What do you do for a living, Michelle?

[D]

I'm currently unemployed.

[B]

Oh, my God. Really? Did you.

[C]

Are you single?

[B]

Yeah. Are you a single lady? You trying to hook up? Well, yeah. She wins 500 grand. I'm going to turn it down real quick. I'm going to try to bang Michelle over 500,000. Okay, Michelle, you didn't hear that. $500,000. What did you do before? Were you fired or did you quit?

[D]

I just decided to take a break.

[B]

Oh.

[D]

I used to clean. I used to clean some houses.

[B]

Oh, you're a maid. That's very Western. Well, okay. Well, how's that? Okay. I'm sorry. I didn't want to offend you. All right. You don't know who we are, so. All right. Are you ready?

[D]

Yes.

[B]

You still don't necessarily believe this is happening, but it is, truly, for $500,000. And I'm stalling because it's coming out of my pocket. Here we go for $500,000. Merc Mania. Who is the current head coach of The Phoenix Mercury?

[C]

5 seconds.

[B]

The current head coach of the Phoenix Mercury?

[D]

I have no idea.

[B]

You have no idea who that is? Do you know anybody who plays for the Mercury at all? That's not part of the giveaway.

[D]

Doesn't that Griner?

[B]

No. She got traded. She plays for it. She's Atlanta now. Oh. Oh, Michelle. New Griner. Christ on a crutch. Do you watch a lot of Mercury basketball?

[D]

I have never watched the game.

[B]

So you're heterosexual?

[D]

I do like men.

[B]

Okay. This is great. Michelle, what's your favorite radio station, if it isn't us?

[C]

Let's see if she remembers.

[B]

Oh, do you listen to radio?

[D]

I listen to Sirius.

[B]

That doesn't get.

[C]

Oh, well, what kind of music are you into?

[B]

Yeah, what do you like to listen to?

[D]

A little bit of everything. Some rock, some pop.

[B]

Okay.

[D]

Even some, you know, other stuff. You know.

[B]

All right. Well, you. You've made my day, Michelle. First off, thanks for answering. Second, thanks for playing along. Nobody answers unknown calls anymore, so you must.

[A]

Missing.

[B]

Yeah. And thank you most of all for not knowing the answer to I'm unemployed.

[D]

I have to answer the phone.

[B]

By the way, I should probably tell you the answer. I don't know either. If you. If had you answered anything, I'd have had to look it up. I don't know. I didn't think about That I didn't hear about that part.

[C]

I tried to. My phone blocks. Any Mercury questions the AI.

[B]

Well, if you want to know, Michelle, the current coach for the Sons is named. Or I mean, the. The girl Sons is named Nate Tibbets. So that would have gotten you 500 grand. And I'm not kidding. We would have given you that money.

[D]

It's not a woman.

[B]

All right, That's. You're a bigot. Don't do that. That's fine. All right, Michelle, thank you very much.

[C]

Good question.

[B]

That was well done. And now it's back to being unemployed. And good luck. I hope everything works out for you. I'll be hearing from Larry McFeely. That's right. Larry's gonna call you later. And please, I hope you had fun.

[D]

And I don't win anything. Like you're not even gonna give me.

[B]

Do you have anything? Oh, we can give you tickets to something if you want that. You know what? We'll give you tickets. Something. Hang on. Hold on, hold on. All right. There you go. I don't know how to put people on hold. There it is. Oh, Brady, my tummy.

[A]

I thought you're gonna be on phone. Hopkins settling that house.

[B]

My achy tummy.

[C]

Way too long to answer that question, Brady.

[B]

Tomorrow goes back to 250,000. I'm so confident. This game reducing. I am. I almost threw up. I wanted to watch that Asian lady eating flies. You have no idea how nervous I just was.

[A]

But how much of a rosebud did you have?

[B]

I was. Yeah. Look, after she didn't get it, I was like. I relaxed and everything. Fel. I don't think people believe what just happened. Happened that I had a lot of confidence going into my question. I didn't even know it. Did you? I've never even heard of Nate Tibbets. I would have guessed.

[C]

I can't be right.

[B]

I would have said. I would have started with somebody called Becky because I think that was a head coach. I would have gone with a girl I didn't know.

[A]

I would have guessed abroad.

[B]

I. Oof.

[A]

Okay, so we're gonna try again tomorrow.

[B]

Maybe 250 grand. The money starts over when somebody answers. So hopefully we get the phones to work again tomorrow. Toledo Yeoman's work by Toledo on. Oh, my God. That was.

[C]

Closed the checkbook out. He was ready to write that check.

[B]

No, that's a pink slip. That's different than a checkbook. Those are very similar. There's carbons on it, though. All right. I'm shaking. We're all done there. Thank you to that lady that answered the phone if you need your house cleaned. Evidently, Rhett's about to get her information. So this worked out okay. Great. We'll do the hot releases in a second. Thanks for indulging. 250 tomorrow. We'll go until the Mercury start playing on TV, and then people might start learning stuff. It's 98. Holmberg's Morning Sickness. Holmberg's morning sickness. My tummy still hurts. Damn it. You made mine turn. I thought we were gonna be fine trusting you. Just. Jesus H. Christ, John. I was nervous for you. I was listening to the show at work and I had co workers stop by and see what they were. They were listening. Nothing here got done. That was like the OJ Trial. Everyone needed to know what the results were. We collectively were laughing and sweating bullets for you. None of us knew the answer to the question, by the way. Even our lesbian co worker didn't know. Her response was, I'm gay, but I'm not that gay.

[E]

God damn it, Juneberg, I was ready to rail on you all day long, but I have to give you credit. That was a legit question. I was expecting like something like, who is their fifth all time leading rebounder in home games played on Wednesdays?

[B]

I'm telling you. And here's the two things I was most confident with. With. Nobody answers their phone, right.

[A]

Yeah, she answered it while she's unemployed.

[B]

Well, looking for a job. But people who are unemployed especially don't answer because collectors call them all day.

[C]

That's true too.

[B]

I didn't think about it. But you're right. She could be. Have her resume out there. And unknown calls are coming in.

[E]

How do you assholes throw a dart and find an unemployed listener who can't be sitting at her computer?

[A]

It was a 6, 3 number of cars.

[B]

It's west side now. Stop it. They have the Internet. I've already been yelled at, by the way. I'm unhinged. What did you do? I've already been told if I try that again, I'm out. What? The bots have called. All of Chicago got nervous. They called immediately and they're like, ah, can't run random cops. You can't just do what you did. I'm like, it was. Don't worry about it.

[E]

Like, ah, John, did you fire up your day? Your delay, like triple time? Because I expected her to answer correctly. And you dropped the mic and drop a few F bombs.

[B]

You just heard. You just heard two panes of very thick glass breaking as I Leapt out of the studio. Yeah.

[C]

Evidently, Mr. Tibbets was talked about a lot yesterday on the sports.

[B]

Yeah. And I got an email from somebody that said, yeah, the sports stations brought up Mr. Tibbets a ton. If she'd have listened to that. Thank God.

[E]

Go back and listen to that call, guys. That lady cleaned up dead bodies.

[B]

I don't know about that body.

[C]

She was very relaxed.

[B]

This one says, hey, Brett, hook me up. Michelle sounds stupid enough to let me go Raw. You can tell on the phone who's gonna allow raw. Wow. Anyway, it was fantastic radio. I'm pleased with the result. I'm gonna get yelled at all day for this, but it was worth it. And I do it for you. I am still a little nervous.

[E]

I marked the day in time so that when the ratings come out, they.

[B]

Can watch that pinnacle. I was horrified. Merc Madness. I told you, it's the most exciting thing that's gonna happen with the WNBA Finals. And the entire time was what we just did. Also, Legal is thinking, I can't get a tattoo based on something I say on the air because if I catch hepatitis, I can soothe them. Isn't that crazy? So it has to be like a henna. I'll do it for real in my own time. Just because I said I would do the bet. But I was told that that's something I'm not allowed to talk about. Not allowed to.

[E]

Not even in henna.

[B]

I'm not even allowed to place my own body in jeopardy for the show.

[E]

Man, that's 10 years of the show.

[B]

Can't give away my own money. Anyway. Everybody just got scared, and I'm with them. I'm kind of enjoying the idea of them saying, please don't ever do that again. Please. You scared us. Because I guess they can. I don't know. I don't know what the rules are. But that was the one and only time we're doing Murder Madness. Because, first off, I didn't think she'd answer. My big thing was no one answers. I was going to get off the hook on that because no one answers their phone.

[A]

I just had a call a minute ago. I didn't answer.

[B]

I mean, you know, screw that. All day long.

[E]

I can't believe I'm telling a company which I assume has multiple locations around the country and probably a lot of revenue to do this. But make a Google phone number. It's free online. And call through your computer. Then you can use that computer audio on the radio. That's just like you do the video.

[B]

It's an IT knob telling us how to do it. And I know there are other ways. Also. Plug a phone into a wall and make it work. Right. Why do I have to do that?

[E]

But we've established that we don't have landlines in this building.

[C]

It's a lot of hoops.

[B]

John, I have to tell you, that was better than the entire Bengals game last night.

[C]

That's true.

[B]

Three and a half hours of entertainment. We did it in a minute.

[E]

John, I'd like to remind you. And you just read this. But you just talked about this. But this guy says. I'd like to remind you that just because you're trying to give away all this cash. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Way to go, Jewish. Doesn't mean you're off the hook from getting that God awful tattoo on your body somewhere. Maybe win this whole effing thing.

[B]

I might go leaning into the legal department there. So you're not catch the hep C. I can't do that. This guy says a West side maid that's unemployed. She must have given birth a couple hours ago. Then she could have her other baby. Watch her new baby. Who's watching the current baby? That's what people think of that anyway. Nerves. Everything else.

[C]

Did she confirm she was west side? Because you could have the.

[B]

Well, we didn't.

[A]

Unemployed 6, 2, 3.

[E]

Yeah, his butt was too puckered to go into detail.

[B]

All the. All the boxes got checked. Unemployed 623 number used to be a maid. I mean, come on.

[E]

And everybody who's telling us to use a speakerphone. We don't have that option.

[B]

Not in the. She's not in the Biltmore area. I'm guessing she might have cleaned a house or two over there. But anyway, the entire thing brought to you by new ac unit.com want to make sure we get our. We want to get our proper hot releases brought to you by and I just had one. I just had a hot release in the bathroom. Save thousand, save time. Buy online new AC unit.com the hot releases, we'll just delay those this morning because of the magic that we just created. The radio's dying and that's the reason why magic just happened on the air.

[E]

John, I'm with Brady. Are you sure you didn't call a Mercury player who just got cut before.

[C]

From the playoff roster still doesn't know the coach.

[B]

Damn. I don't know my coach. That's what we would have heard. She sounded feminine. I don't think she played for the team.

[A]

That one dude in the building.

[B]

Yeah. I worked there. I don't know. Nathaniel something. Or the Sutherland. Oh, no. All right, we got the entertainment drill coming off in just moments. It's 98, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. 98. Can you take.

[F]

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[E]

Experian.