Podcast Summary: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – Rock Wars

Episode: Song Playing in a Man's Head As He's Going to a WNBA Game
Date: October 1, 2025
Host(s): John Holmberg (A), Brady Bogen (C), Dick Toledo (B), Bret Vesely (absent; proxy Larry)
Theme: What song is playing in a man's head as he’s reluctantly going to a WNBA game?

Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness centers around their recurring “Rock Wars” segment: a comedic, open-ended battle where each host picks a song that best answers a scenario. Today’s debate: What song would be playing in the mind of a man being “dragged” to a WNBA (Women’s National Basketball Association) game by a wife/girlfriend/daughter?
The hosts exchange banter about men’s reluctance toward WNBA games, what would motivate them to attend, and general commentary on women’s basketball, all delivered with the show’s signature irreverent, sarcastic humor.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. WNBA Attendance: Reluctant Motivations (03:50–09:30)

• Premise:
  • Bret (represented by Larry) introduces the scenario: “If you’re a dude and you got drugged to this game for some reason… what is the song while you’re walking into the arena? What’s just going through your head, man?” (04:00)
• Commentary on WNBA:
  • Holmberg jokes about the quality of the WNBA:
    • “I said that’s a sport. This WNBA thing is a mess. Terribly awful, boring, and no one ever calls it that.” (06:24)
    • He suggests “Shrink the court, drop the net down… cut out two of the girls… It’s a better game.” (06:05)
  • The group discusses changes already made to women’s basketball (smaller ball, shorter three-point line), and advocates for more to “make it a sport.”
• On Male Attendance:
  • The hosts emphasize there’s only three likely reasons a man would go:
    1. “Trying to appease a girl…” (04:35)
    2. “The girlfriend, the wife, the daughter, something is making you go to this game.” (04:36)
    3. Or, as Holmberg cracks, “Unless it ends like a pornhub video… your step lesbian— I don’t know what kind of attraction I would have to have to somebody to make them say, 'It means a lot to me to go to this WNBA game with me,' and still not want to break up with them…” (08:19)

2. Comedy & Sarcasm: WNBA’s Style of Play (05:40–08:20)

• Holmberg lampoons WNBA commentary:
  • “If you ever watch one of the games this week...when somebody throws an airball or just falls down for no reason, listen to what the announcers say… An airball is like, ‘oh, good defense.’ What, did she make a face at her?” (06:39)
• Commentary on women getting competitive:
  • “That many women doing the same thing at the same time is inevitably going to cause a couple of them to hate each other. They get physical and mean…” (06:49)
• Reference to league drama:
  • “The one from the losing Lynx team just put out a whole video basically saying that the commissioner sucks —and the commissioner’s a lady!” (07:00)

3. Personal Examples: Would You Go for Your Kid? (08:55–10:26)

• Brady admits he would go if his daughter, Kirby, was into the WNBA—“If Kirby loved the WNBA, you’d be going.” (09:24)
• Holmberg claims Brady would pretend to enjoy it “You would stamp down your true feelings because you don’t want to hurt her.” (09:35)
• They joke about previous events Brady attended for his daughter:
  • “We took her to Dan TDM.” (09:54)
  • “You said… not bad… not that it sucked, because she liked it.” (09:56)

Rock Wars Segment

Topic: If you’re a man walking into a WNBA game reluctantly, what’s the song playing in your head?

Contestant Song Choices & Rationale

• Brett’s Proxy (Larry):

  • Song: "Suicide Solution" – Ozzy Osbourne
  • Reason: “...the only way out of this night —I can’t do it— is suicide.” (14:19)
  • Darkly comic, playing on the trope of male despair at being 'forced' to go.

• Brady:

  • Song: "Nookie" – Limp Bizkit
  • Reason: “...if you’re going on a date or you’re going with your wife, there’s only one reason you’re going: the nookie.” (15:35)
  • Joking that the only reason a guy would endure WNBA is hope for sex.

• Holmberg:

  • Song: "Brick" – Ben Folds Five
  • Reason: “When you go to a basketball game filled with the WNBA players, you realize there’s one word that keeps popping up in your head… That was an abortion. Every single time… So abortion, women’s rights and bricks.” (17:27)
  • Ties together political/athletic wordplay: “brick” as a missed shot, the abortion theme from the song, and women’s autonomy.

Results: Voting & Winner (20:34–21:45)

• Listeners weighed in via text and email.
• Final Tally: Brett’s pick (“Suicide Solution”) won by a clear margin.
• Notable Quote:
  • “I have 8, Brady has 3, and Brett has 10.” (21:19)
• Holmberg jokes: “Brett stole those… He goes to win Rock Wars.” (21:23)
• John Gordon, the designated tie-breaker, confirms: Brett wins. (21:33)
• The episode closes with a play of “Suicide Solution,” in salute to Brett, who was absent due to family matters.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On the segment’s comedic spirit:

• Holmberg: “Shrink the court, you got a sport. Drop the nets down to nine feet. And then I think you could do it with four. There’s always two on the floor that aren’t very good at the game.” (06:05)

On male motivation:

• Brady: “If you’re going on a date…there’s only one reason you’re going—the nookie.” (15:35)

On honesty for your kid’s sake:

• Holmberg: “You would stamp down your true feelings because you don’t want to hurt her. Yes. You Brady.” (09:35)

On the winner:

• Toledo: “Text right now. Brett’s got the lead…” (21:33)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• [04:00] — Introduction of the Rock Wars topic: Guy dragged to WNBA game; what's his song?
• [05:40–08:20] — Sarcastic critique of the WNBA's style of play.
• [09:00–10:26] — Members discuss whether they’d go for their kids/girlfriends.
• [13:06–17:27] — Song choice explanations and playful banter.
• [20:34–21:45] — Listener voting, results, and winner announcement.

Takeaway

This episode is a typical, rowdy installment of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness: quick-witted, often irreverent, loaded with cultural commentary and musical puns. The “Rock Wars” format provides structure for their comedic riffs, while the hosts’ friendship and willingness to push buttons set the tone.

Most memorable is their synthesis of current events, pop culture, and edgy humor—this time, all about men, reluctance, and what it would take to enjoy a WNBA game.