Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – October 13, 2025

Episode Title: Trying To Explain Our New Take It In The App Contest - Dementia May Have Had John Finding An Old Alarm Clock - Is Trend Of 90s Giant Babies Coming Back - Local Weatherpeople Claiming To Not Know When Rain Ends
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Podcast: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness, 98KUPD

Episode Overview

This episode dives into several of the morning show’s favorite territories: irreverent, self-deprecating takes on technology and radio contests, John’s paranoia about aging and memory loss, pop culture nostalgia about giant babies from 90s talk shows, and potshots at local weatherpeople. The crew’s banter is as chaotic and entertaining as ever as they try, and largely fail, to explain a new “Take It In The App” contest. Interspersed with complaints about their station’s execs and some hilarious asides, it’s classic HMS—equal parts cranky, absurd, and self-aware.

Key Segments & Discussion Points

1. Explaining (and Fumbling) the New 'Take It In The App' Contest

Timestamps: 00:15 – 15:47

• Technical Difficulties & Confusion:
  The team opens the show in a scramble as they attempt (with much sarcasm) to kick off a new on-air contest that requires listeners to enter keywords via the station’s app.

  • “We took it in the app. All right, so we're, like, looking around. Everybody's like, they're in there. So this became this mad scramble in the room.” —John, [00:48]

• Making Fun of Radio’s Old-School Mindset:
  John and Bret rip into management’s outdated expectations, like how only Bluetooth speaker listening “counts” for ratings—not earbuds.

  • “That's how stupid radio executives have gotten is that they embrace technology by saying, yeah, make everybody listen to the app. But if they listen on Bluetooth speakers, it counts, but otherwise it doesn't.” —John, [01:21]

• Rules and Overcomplication:
  The team mocks the nine-step process and endless rules, with references to trying (and failing) to start the contest on time and the barrage of listener confusion via texts and emails.

  • “Don’t text, don’t email it.” —John, [12:58]
  • "You're giving me how much and a chance?" —Rich, mocking the pitch to listeners, [13:34]

• Memorable Moment:
  “Brady's trying to do it right now. And if you're struggling, I got mine in. It's pretty easy.”
  "How do you enter it?" —Brady, [14:25-14:29]

2. On Ratings, Radio Tech, & Management’s Disconnect

Timestamps: 01:42 – 15:47

• Bureaucratic Nonsense:
  The hosts roast “the Bobs,” their code for out-of-touch execs, for convoluted rules and not understanding real-world listening habits.

  • “Whoever says people usually listen at the computer on a speaker has gray hair. No one, not even driving most of the time, blasts anything on speakers.” —John, [05:59]

• Listener Reactions:
  They read and respond to emails about how most can’t or won’t listen on external speakers at work, often due to job restrictions or simple inconvenience.

  • “Chris Clark says a lot of job sites now have banned speakers.” —Brett, [07:57]

• Classic John Rant:
  John summarizes the technical absurdity:
  “You know, we've made it so easy for you to listen to 45 different things and hopefully the one piece of spaghetti that sticks to the wall, the Bobs, William. They're done.” —John, [09:31]

3. Current Events Tangent: Middle East Controversy

Timestamps: 15:47 – 17:33

• Unplanned Email Flame:
  John responds to a listener angry over his relief about hostages being released in the Middle East, getting trolled for being a supposed “Zionazi.”
  • “I don't know what a Zionazi is, but that's confusing. But thanks for the update. I'll look it up later.” —John, [16:49]
  • "Who else would you listen to besides Joe Mama?" —Brett, [16:59]

4. Alarm Clocks, Memory Lapses, and Fears of Dementia

Timestamps: 20:01 – 29:43

• John’s Midnight Panic Attack:
  John tells a hilarious, vaguely concerning story about searching his house for an old alarm clock he hasn’t used since the Obama era, convinced he needs to set it despite modern phone alarms.

  • “And then I realized I have not used that clock for 14 years. Whoa.” —John, [23:27]
  • “And then I went to bed worrying that, oh, the neurons aren't firing anymore. Something's wrong… I counted to 15. Pretty smooth. Got a little screwed up around 12.” —John, [23:52]

• Hosts’ Alarm Habits:
  The team shares what songs wake them up, with John using Nicki Minaj’s "Roman Holiday” and Brett going with a heavy drum song.

  • “That's my alarm. That's one of them.” —John, [27:07]
  • “It literally… Those drums just kick in every morning.” —Brett, [27:14]

5. 90s-Style Giant Babies are Back

Timestamps: 30:24 – 36:50

• Nostalgia for 90s TV Oddity:
  John is gleeful over a news story about 33-pound toddlers and the resurgence of “giant babies” coverage reminiscent of old talk shows like Maury and Sally Jesse Raphael.

  • “A lady—new record—eight. Well, there was two of them. They did a story about how big babies are being born again and the average weight is like 12 and a half pounds in this one area. That's a huge baby.” —John, [30:54]
  • “Hosted up her huge baby and people like, she's like, it is not AI. This is my baby.” —John, [31:46]

• Talk Show Recollections:
  They reminisce about Maury’s many “is this a man or a woman?” and “giant babies” episodes, and the absurdity of TV audiences weighing in.

  • "I always wondered...how about the girl who's in the contest?...and you were an actual woman. I am a little... I'm a little boxy." —John, [35:13]

6. Ugly Babies & Parental Blindness

Timestamps: 39:12 – 43:37

• Brutal Honesty About Babies:
  John admits most babies are ugly and only a handful in his life have been genuinely cute. The others, he claims, get polite but meaningless compliments.
  • “If I don’t say anything about your baby, good or bad, it’s ugly. If I tell you it's good-looking, it’s good-looking. I'm like, that's a good-looking baby. I've said that maybe three times in my entire life.” —John, [41:09]
  • “You see pictures of me as a baby...my head, I mean, that thing was a tube.” —John, [42:01]

7. Local Weatherpersons & Predictive Comedy

Timestamps: 45:00 – 50:46

• Mocking Local Newscasters:
  They poke fun at TV weatherpeople for vague forecasts and exaggerated rain coverage, with an extended bit about Paul Horton’s signature catchphrase.

  • “Paul Horton starts every sentence, no matter what. If he eulogized, you’d start with, ‘hey, whoa, buddy.’” —John, [46:00]
  • “You're a weatherman, why are you surprised?” —John, [47:41]

• John’s Wish for Weathermen:
  John wants forecasters to take pride in correct predictions, demanding instant replays of their “I called it!” moments.

  • “I want a weatherman who goes, nailed that.” —John, [48:47]

Notable Quotes & Banter

• On Contest Complexity:
  “You just go to four different sites. That's what I'm saying. You make an application for a loan. You wait for Doug Hopkins to call you with an offer.” —John, [12:30]

• On Ratings Metrics:
  “We've made ourselves the tree in the forest.” —John, [02:09]

• On Management Paranoia:
  “If you have to have that disclaimer at the end of your own meeting, then you know what you've done is probably retarded.” —John, [08:11]

• On Baby Trends:
  “I'm in heaven. I might start crying. I might finally get it, why you want one. Oh, I would love to have one of these Sharpay babies.” —John, [41:27]

• On Local News:
  “Not so much the rain you need to worry about. We sent our Asian reporter out there driving.” —John, [47:06]

Episode Highlights By Timestamp

• 00:15–04:47: Contest launch confusion and radio management jokes.
• 05:08–08:38: Ripping into the logic of radio ratings.
• 13:02–15:26: Listener confusion and “Brett with the Bobs” as a stand-in for regular folks.
• 23:27–24:12: John’s surreal alarm clock search, brain fog, and self-administered dementia check.
• 30:24–35:13: Giant baby stories, nostalgia for ‘90s talk show weirdness.
• 41:09–42:01: John’s brutal honesty about ugly babies and self-mockery as a baby.
• 45:00–47:41: Local weather reporting lampooned—“whoa, buddy!”
• 48:47–50:46: The hypothetical “prideful weatherman” rant and rain wrap-up.

Recap & Tone

• Language & Tone:
  Blunt, sarcastic, occasionally coarse, always bantering and self-deprecating. Inside jokes, Arizona local flavor, and pop culture references abound.

• Summary in a Sentence:
  The HMS crew tries (and fails) to make sense of their app contest, gripes about radio bureaucracy, delights in weird pop culture trends like fat babies, and skewers both themselves and the entire city’s news media along the way.

For Listeners:

If you missed the show, know that:

• All contest entries must be through the app—don’t call, text, or email!
• The show's strength is in its ability to poke fun at itself, the radio industry, and Arizona life with a mix of biting wit and earnest confusion.
• There’s no such thing as a simple HMS segment—all things go off the rails, but that’s part of the charm.

Main Hosts:

• John Holmberg: Ringleader, legendary ranter, champion of the ‘we took it in the app’ confusion.
• Brady Bogen: Resident straight man who can’t work the app either.
• Bret Vesely: Deadpan with a quick wit, speaks for the exasperated listener.
• Rich “Dick” Toledo: The (occasionally) competent producer.

Bottom Line:
Come for the contest, stay for the chaos. If you have a giant baby, John desperately wants to see it. If you’re a local weatherperson, remember: always start with “whoa, buddy.”