10-20-25 - FULL SHOW - MONDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness – 10-20-25 Full Show, 98KUPD Arizona

Episode Overview

A very "Monday" episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness, with John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, and Dick Toledo, tackling everything from the sad state of Arizona Cardinals football, crazy sports fan decisions, true crime obsessions, the great Louvre jewel heist, workplace romance, gross handyman stories, to even the new phenomenon of Ozempic-related body issues. They banter with their trademark mix of cynical wit, awkward honesty, and raucous "guy talk."

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Main Discussion Themes

1. Arizona Cardinals, NFL Ineptitude & Fan Pain

[02:19–08:09]

• John opens with yet another glum Monday for Cardinals fans, mocking the team's persistently disappointing performance and the emotional toll on loyal supporters.
• He riffs on how every team has unique misery—Cardinals, Jets, Titans, Raiders, Packers, even his own Bears—but the Cardinals' knack for blowing leads is "impressive."
• The guys joke about Cardinals fans giving up by mid-October, selling tickets, turning Sundays over to their wives, and Arizona antique stores and wineries benefiting from early-season football widowers.
• “Congratulations. Antique shops and farmers markets. The women win!” – John [05:05]
• “Find something else…some sort of return on investment at least emotionally, that isn’t constantly bad.” – John [03:55]
• The crew muses on job security for head coach Jonathan Gannon and the cursed state of both the Cardinals and Jets coaching gigs: “Why would anyone want that job? It’s not an honor. I’ll be an assistant first.” – John [08:11]
• Jokes about desperate coaching solutions: even high school coaches or their own show’s characters being more qualified.

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2. NFL Weekend Recap, Sports Schadenfreude, and Buying World Series Tickets Too Soon

[10:39–18:22]

• NFL discussion shifts to general fan pain—Holmberg's joy at other teams' humiliation (especially Giants, Raiders, Jets).
• The group pokes fun at brutal coaching records and fashion choices (“two teams with coaches in capri pants, a combined 1-11. Maybe it’s the pants.” – John [12:32]).
• Hilarity about Dick Toledo buying World Series tickets for his Mariners before they clinched a berth, with everyone predicting a jinx.
  • “We should punish him for being so stupid and jinxing his team. He should have to give those [tickets] away on the air.” – John [17:21]
• “It’s like a sacrifice… appease the sports gods.” – Brady [18:01]
• The sense that intense sports fandom is more masochism than hope: “It’s like being released from prison when your team finally wins.” – John [153:15]

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3. The Louvre Jewel Heist & Pink Panther/Ocean’s 11 Theories

[18:22–24:02]

• Ridiculous museum heist takes over: jewel thieves in Paris simply using a crane and a truck in broad daylight, and within 7 minutes, stealing items ‘without earthly value.’
• The team debates whether this could be insider help (“The security guards did it. They did it.” – John [20:21]).
• All compare it to heist movies, especially “Entrapment” (with a full group reminiscence of Catherine Zeta-Jones' famous laser-dodging scene: “I am hard as a rock right now, you can call me the Rock, which is another movie I was in.” – John [27:37]).
• Wry take on movie security vs. reality: “Ocean’s movies are more believable—no inside guy? Please.” – John [21:45]

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4. "Handyman Horror": Home Repairs & Gross Real-Life Crime

[28:18–39:35]

• They riff on a handyman caught on surveillance at Luke Air Force Base stealing a woman's bra and leaving it with suspicious white stains.
• Gross-out jokes about the idea that any time you leave service workers in your home alone, you risk having your intimate apparel “violated”:
  • “If you ever had a handyman in your house... there's a good chance that dude used your underwear as a tugging device.” – John [32:22]
• Advice to women: Just bleach everything after contractors leave.
• “If you’ve ever had a handyman in your house, do your laundry today. All of it, every single one of them.” – John [39:06]
• Musings on how “no man would notice if his underwear had trace evidence of random strangers.”

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5. No-Kings Marches, Frogs, and Protest Fatigue

[41:21–43:47]

• Sarcastic congratulations to Arizona’s “No Kings” protesters for keeping the state king-free and for not blocking traffic too badly.
• Mockery of people in frog/furry costumes protesting (“That’s the Portland symbol for ‘you’re not in Portland, bitch’”).
• “Stop screwing up streets for causes that aren’t real, or for causes that are real, stop walking on the road.” – John [43:02]

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6. True Crime Obsession – Netflix’s "Ed Gein" & What We’re Really Watching

[57:44–76:31]

• The group dives deep into the Netflix Ed Gein miniseries, dissecting its intentionally fictional moments, how it critiques “murder porn” fandom, and how the audience is secretly the subject.
• “They’re pointing the camera at us, saying, ‘you’re the monsters. This is you.’” – John [58:05]
• Discussion of real Ed Gein details vs. myth, his inspiration for “Psycho” and “Texas Chainsaw Massacre.”
• Layered take: the show purposely mixes fact and fiction to reflect our appetite for sensationalism, regardless of truth.
• “You can make it up, so long as it’s entertaining and salacious. People will mop it up like bread and gravy.” – John [59:07]
• Contemplation of whether the now-accepted practice of boys trying on their moms' underwear will make future serial killers less repressed, and how repression shaped Ed Gein, Bundy, etc.
  • “If you got a kid this morning, lay out some laces for him… If the kid looks at you like, ‘is it OK?’ – yeah, give it a try.” – John [74:30]

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7. Medical Angst: The Rise of ‘Ozempic Vagina’

[76:31–83:32]

• Recent news (and listener texts) covering side effects of Ozempic: rapid weight loss and, for women, dramatic drooping of their vulva/labia.
• “Would you rather be fat and have a nice vagina, or look good on a scale, but the whole thing’s hanging down like an Arby’s sandwich?” – John [77:40]
• Hilarious—and gross—debate about what’s worse: saggy genitals or lifelong body insecurity, referencing Hope Solo’s infamous leaked nudes as “internet cautionary tale.”
• “If women’s vulvas are falling apart, your foreskin’s gonna look like a turtleneck.” – John [87:54]

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8. Listener Letters: Love at Work, Post-poop Romance, and Bedroom Standoffs

[128:53–146:33]

• Workplace Flirtation: Listener ‘Francesca’ wants to hook up with a coworker but fears job consequences.
  • Brady urges caution, John says: “Blow that man. As a woman, you have nothing to lose. If he makes a move and you say yes, no guy is reporting you.” ([131:00])
• Dirty Bed Mystery: Woman’s husband poops at night, returns to bed, ruins romance; she washes sheets daily; other guys appalled.
  • “If your wife is telling you, here’s what would solve the problem...and you don’t do it -- you have no one to blame but yourself.” – John [139:49]
• No More Oral, No More Joy: Listener’s wife refuses to perform oral sex after years, citing hate for it. Crew jokes about taking away everything she likes in response.

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Notable Quotes

• "It's like being tied up and force-fed something you like but people think might be wrong." – John (on the Ed Gein Netflix series) [59:27]
• “The best way to keep protestors from blocking the road is to let people drive through.” – John [43:02]
• “Ladies, if there's a scratch in your bra, it’s got a name: Julian Ramirez Mayo.” – John [34:24]
• “If you had a handyman in your house, do your laundry today. All of it. Start over, start all.” – John [39:06]
• “Would you rather be fat and have a nice vagina, or look good on a scale, but the whole thing’s hanging down like an Arby’s sandwich?” – John [77:40]
• “You can make it up, so long as it’s entertaining and salacious. People will mop it up, like bread and gravy.” – John [59:07]

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Segment Timestamps

| Timestamp | Segment Description | |------------|-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------| | 02:19 | Cardinals Monday misery, NFL fan pain, sports jinxes | | 10:39 | NFL recap/rant, sports schadenfreude, Toledo’s World Series jinx | | 18:22 | Louvre heist breakdown, "Entrapment" scene nostalgia | | 28:18 | Handyman horror stories and fear for unattended laundry | | 41:21 | ‘No King’ protest satire | | 57:44 | Deep dive on Ed Gein series, murder porn fandom | | 76:31 | Ozempic vagina chat | | 128:53 | Listener mailbag: love at work/marriage, bedroom body horror | | 146:33 | Baseball fandom pain, sports curses, and the relief (not joy) of winning at last |

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Tone & Style

Holmberg and the crew riff with irreverent, unfiltered, and sometimes gross-out humor. They don’t shy away from edgy or awkward subjects — regular references to body fluids, true crime, and sexual mishaps abound. Pop culture and sports are recurring themes, but the “riffs” veer far afield, often circling back to mock the original topic or one-up each other's most shocking comment.

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For Listeners Seeking Specific Segments

• Cardinals/Painful Fandom: 02:19–13:50
• NFL/World Series/Ticket Jinx: 13:50–18:22
• Louvre Heist & Movie Comparisons: 18:22–26:20
• Handyman Crime/Gross Home Anecdotes: 28:18–41:15
• Ed Gein/True Crime Deep Dive: 57:44–76:31
• Ozempic/Body Topic: 76:31–83:32
• Listener Letters: Sex, Poop, & Coworkers: 128:53–146:33

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Final Thoughts

This episode epitomizes unscripted, local morning radio: topics jump wildly, but the laughter, irreverence, and Arizona references make it a must-listen for fans looking for both a sports catharsis and a dose of relatable (if sometimes shocking) banter.

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For the true spirit, listen to the whole show. But if your home just had repair work or you're considering Ozempic, you may want to refrain from examining your underwear drawer or... certain body parts... while you do.

Transcript

[Brett Vessel]

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[John Holmberg]

It's John Holberg here from the morning sickness and I'm chilling away from my friend Shane Orlando from Orlando Auto Body. Shane, people wreck their cars. They got to deal with the insurance companies. Insurance rates have gotten weird. You deal with insurance all the time. What are we doing wrong? Well, I would take the car to a shop, you know, we've got to take the car apart, evaluate all the damage, and that's a process, right? So Shane will handle that for you. The insurance companies are not going to be your best friends, but Shane will be. Shane Orlando. Orlando Auto Body. All the locations you could ever imagine surrounding the Valley men. You take care of everyone else. Now let Limitless TRT and Aesthetics take care of you. Limitless TRT and Aestics is redefining sexual wellness by helping men reclaim their confidence with non surgical permanent male enhancement. The platinum procedure delivers instant permanent girth with minimal downtime. The P long protocol naturally adds length and girth. No gimmicks, no guesswork, no surgery. Just proven solutions that transform how you feel and look. But book your free consultation online@Limitless TRT and Aesthetics.com. let's make you the legend you were always meant to be. It's John Holmer here from the morning sickness. And it's time to talk again about my friends at Trajan Wealth. I always talk to you about the will and trust. The estate plan that I put together with Kent at Trajan Wealth. Kent was unbelievable. And, man, you want to make sure medical power of attorney and power of attorney are established. Because if something bad happens and you don't have anybody speaking for you, somebody you don't know will keep control of your life even when you're not in control. All you have to do is get it done. Today at Trajan Wealth, 480-990-3300. Trajan wealth legal services are offered through trades in the State Law Firm LLC.

[Brett Vessel]

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[Brett Vessel]

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[Brett Vessel]

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[John Holmberg]

Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Monday. It is 5:45am that's the morning sickness. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett. There's Big Dick Toledo. Off and running for another Monday here in Arizona. Very rarely gets a victory Monday for you Cardinal fans. And I've almost root for you guys in a weird way. Again, you know me, and this is the way I think all fans should be. I have an incredible amount of hate for all the other teams except one. I don't root for things unless it benefits my team. And then in the end, I root for like. Like, for instance, the Giants and Broncos game would've been better had the Broncos just lost the game. But the hysterical nature in which the Giants took one in the ass yesterday made me quite happy. I was like, I like when other teams, like, slunk off the field. Sad.

[Brady]

Welcome to the. Welcome to the league, rookies.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that. That part, I actually enjoyed that in the beginning. I'm like, hey, there's Cam and Jackson Darton. They're kind of fun. And then I liked it all swinging against him, I liked. What I liked was they were emotionally high and then they got. They got stabbed in the eyes. And I. I love that about the game of football then. And then also I realized that that game had it all because for an entire half, the Broncos were taken in the ass. It was reciprocal. It was a fantastic moment for a fan who doesn't care about any other team but one. Then you watch the Cardinals and I'm like, come on, guys, just. You know what? These poor people that spent. I'm starting to get, like, financially concerned for Cardinal fans. I mean, this is a. If you have an advisor, he would tell you your emotions and your money cannot mix with that. Find something else. Some sort of return on investment, at least emotionally that isn't constantly bad. Every team has an. Okay, jets fans. I'll give you the jets fans. I don't know what you're doing either, but my God, it's just gotta be all five in a row. And here we go down that same road. And again, I told you last week, the worst phrase in sports. Following the best phrase in sports. Time for game seven. Worst raise in sports. I think Jacoby Brissette is our starter.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, no kidding.

[John Holmberg]

And he is like, he's just better for this offense. And they show up. So here starts the annual migration of Cardinal fans back to doing stuff on Sundays that isn't Cardinal related and selling their season tickets to whomever is in town's fans. That's going to be the. That just. The stadium's going to fill up with the opposition's color starting now. Fans should.

[Brady]

Congratulations. Antique shops and farmers.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God, the women. The women win. You know who wins in Arizona? The women. The women win because their husbands only spend six weeks in, you know, making them football widows. That's it. Then they come back, they crawl out of the grave like, Jesus. They're like, hey, I'm back. And what. What do you want to go down to. To Kartner Caverns for? But your football team's on weekend. I don't care. We're going. Let's go on a little weekender.

[Brett Vessel]

Postino. Sales are going to be down now because all broads are going to be out with their husband.

[John Holmberg]

Husbands are going to be doing. He's just so attentive. And it's only October and when your season ends.

[Brady]

I don't like it. He's listening.

[John Holmberg]

In the second week of October, it's like, oh, the guys know. It's like, I just gotta find something else to do. Maybe I'll get. Maybe I'll get blown if I take my wife to Wilcox or something. I don't know where you go, but it's terrible. It's just terrible. And I don't know what's worse. I don't know if having a fraudulent team like mine that wins games but is no threat to a Super bowl, unless you know something drastic changes. You just kind of meander through the whole thing and you're happy, your team's competitive. I think I'd take that over, you know, what's going on in New York and here and Tennessee. Tennessee's a catastrophe. And anyway, almost had the packers. Almost had a. Cardinals have the distinction of being a team that's. That's lost more games in the first seven weeks of the. Of the season, having led by seven or more going into the fourth quarter. So.

[Brett Vessel]

God damn Cardinals. I was pulling for you.

[John Holmberg]

I know. I kind of felt for you guys. I was like, just get them Cardinals. You'll be all right. And I know you are because it benefits the Bears.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah. And it pisses my wife off.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. And that's a good win. Like, she takes that. Rub it in your face, Packer fandom, and you get to go, man, I Guess you take it in the ass this week.

[Brett Vessel]

Although they lost it to Brown, so I'm good with that.

[John Holmberg]

We all. Yeah, that was. That's. That's a season's worth of awesome. When something that crappy. Oh, it happens. But anyway, there you go. Enjoy your day, Cardinal fans, as best you can. I would love to help you out with some sort of news that would be beneficial to the future, but it doesn't look good. It's. I think we can call it. It's like those elections, you know, in the election day. We're gonna go ahead and call it. Cardinals are out. Cardinals are on the clock. This is it. There's gonna be a battle. Yeah.

[Brady]

And who goes first between the draft.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, the Cardinals aren't a first pick. They're. Sadly. They're going to suck just enough to be like a 9th or 10th, which is still going to be good. And you can get a quarterback there, but, I mean, there's some bad football teams out there, but. Yeah, I'm going to go ahead and say it. Yeah. They're on the clock. You're on the clock, Cardinals, your season is here. It is October 20th. You can start watching college football and see who there is to draft, because that's what you're gonna have to do now. Can they turn it around? Sure, I guess, if you want to keep that crappy hope alive. But they won't. There's just nothing about them that's going to be good. Trust me.

[Brett Vessel]

How long does Gannon hang on?

[John Holmberg]

I mean, that's the sad thing, you know, you're gonna lose a good coach just because it just. It's jinxed. Something's wrong with that place. Gannon probably sticks around for. I don't know. If you want to get him a rookie quarterback and start this whole thing over, who knows? Who knows? He'll quit. I don't know why anybody would want that job. This should be the first job in sports. That and the jets job where you're offered it. And it's not an honor. You know, it's not one of those. I'm gonna. I'm not an NFL coach. It's like. No, I don't. I'm not taking that. I'll be an assistant first.

[Brady]

Not get a high school coach to bite on that.

[John Holmberg]

They could. Yeah. That would be like me. That's what. That's what. Your job interview process. Hey, you want to be the coach of the jets or the Cardinals? You talking to me like that guy has to be the one that you hire next he's surprised then anybody even offered it to him. Yeah, it looks like you got this high school team churning. I guess just the kind of go getter we're looking for in New York. All right, you take some rube up there. It can't be worse. They're 0 and 6.

[Brett Vessel]

Maybe DZ should take over the Cardinals.

[John Holmberg]

Zellner can coach.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

The coach over there in Gilbert. I think that's a she.

[Brett Vessel]

Next step up.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, Coach Clark here. Dobson High School hall of Fame. Arizona High School Sports hall of Fame. Coach Mike Clark. How you doing? Sucks. How you? Sucks Doing notice. Hey, Brady. I thought you were on a diet. Still look terrible. How you doing?

[Brady]

Thank you.

[John Holmberg]

Keep it together, man. Shoot. Derek Zone. The cat just popped in here. Derek Zone. I can't be head coach in the NFL.

[Brett Vessel]

Why not?

[John Holmberg]

Well, I want it to remain fair. And you put DZ schemes up in that thing and next thing you know you've got, you know, an undefeated team for over a decade. People stops watching.

[Brady]

You need to coach.

[John Holmberg]

I can coach, but I already done. I'm. Like I said, hall of Fame. Shoot. Hall of Fame. Arizona high school sports. I mean, what suck are you talking about, Brady? I'm already your halftime interviews. Shoot. I'm already established in the world of coaching. What the suck she tell you what DZ gets in there, man. That ball. I'm gonna have to make that thing twice as big for DZ's offense just to make it fair. I'd say make it fair. Opposition use a regular size NFL football. DZ's team uses an anvil. That would be the only thing that makes it fair. He has to chug. And DZ could do it. That's how we used to practice adoption Ice God like. All right, DZ put that baby football down. You're too much of a man for that. And I'd give him a second anvil and he'd throw it around. I mean, knocking receivers down till they got used to it.

[Brady]

Tight spiral.

[John Holmberg]

Tightest spiral you ever seen. Shoot. What the suck. Yeah. DZ could coach over there. DZ could get the job in New York. And he'd be honored because it wasn't like the trajectory you normally expect. But I wouldn't take that job. New York and Arizona. Good news is, guys, you got a lot of decent shows on television. You can start binging if you're interested. You don't have to watch football on the weekends anymore. It's over. It's all over. Unless you wanna. And I would do it too. Put yourself through it. Guy says, don't forget to include the Raiders in that. Oh, my, how the mighty have fallen. That Raiders team is bad, bad. 30 to nothing. When I. Or was it 31? I don't remember either way. First snap, Kenny Pickett. The new. The hope, the dream just drops it. He picked up the ball like it was like the Raiders treated it like it was poison or it was nuclear. Oh, hilarious. Yeah. Yesterday was a lot of clunkers. A lot of good clunkers. And then the end of the Giants and Broncos. I periodically checked in. I didn't sit through a lot.

[Brady]

It was amazing.

[John Holmberg]

No, well, there wasn't anything to watch. Like the games that I watched. I'm like, these matchups are no good today. The jets, they were actually like playing. They like still allowed them on the field and they're like, nah, you guys should. They like 40 yards of offense. They're horrible. They're just awful. The Raiders, Raiders at 95. All the Dolphins and Browns. When the whole day starts with the Rams And Jags going 31 7, you wake up and you see the first game as a blowout. And then you look and you're like, my options are Dolphins, browns. Not only is it ugly to look at just the color scheme, the. The football was horrible.

[Brady]

There's two or three times you thought, I don't think they're gonna let the coach on the plane on the way home.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, two. Two teams have coaches with Capri pants and combined they're one and 11. So I don't know. Maybe it's the pants. It could be. It used to be the shoes. Maybe it's just the pants.

[Brett Vessel]

Robert brings up a good point. It's like the Cardinals call up to be, you know, you want to be the head coach just like in major league. Hey, you want to coach the Indians? Let me call you back. Got a guy from gun line for some white walls.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's, it's. It's almost exactly that. You want to coach the Indians?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You got stuff you can do? You got things you can take care of? We still. We can win. We have winners and stuff, huh? In a couple minutes, I'll give you.

[Brett Vessel]

Another word for our we almost won money.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, don't get started on that. I'm just saying in a couple minutes, we're going to give you a vi. Or I'll give you the word. I already. The word is VIP, but at 6 o', clock, it's not really a word either. VIP.

[Brady]

That is interesting.

[John Holmberg]

On a word, VIP is VIP is what we're doing today for 6 o'. Clock. You can go on the the app and put that in the promo code for 6am get yourself registered for yet another chance at a thousand American dollars. We hand out money trying to buy your love and get the Bobs off our back about the apps and boost those app numbers. All right, we can do that. Here's an idea we had on all of our stations. You guys can do it too. It's called creativity. Thanks, Bob. You are great. And in sports news this weekend, our own boss, Tripp Reeb, came in here bragging, I'm going to tonight's game. That was on Friday. I was in his LA sweater. His Dodger sweater looked very nice. Look, Dapper had his LA tennis shoes on as it's the cleanest I've seen him. Is it? You don't think Tripp's clean, man?

[Brady]

Oh, no, he is. But. But on his golf pullovers, there's usually, you know, it's like everything they get.

[John Holmberg]

You think he's got stains all over his clothes.

[Brady]

Yeah. Tobacco.

[John Holmberg]

You should have kept that to yourself. That's your boss, for God's sakes.

[Brady]

Mustard, ketchup.

[John Holmberg]

I've never noticed. Well, Brady does notice when there's food on you point that out. I don't think I've ever noticed that Trip's a filthy man, like you're claiming. I've always thought he was fairly clean. He smells nice. Anyway, he'll have a word with you later. The Dodgers stuff he had on, I thought it looked nice, but I think he always tends to look okay. Not as disheveled great to me. Yeah, I thought so too, Brad. Anyway, the man flew out on Friday afternoon to go watch what is not being paid attention to enough, if you ask me, what is without question the greatest performance in sports history. Maybe as an individual, I mean, you can start looking at, you know, Michael Jordan's putting up 58 and finals games and dudes who have had, you know, quadruple doubles in a game. I don't think there's been anything like what just happened in baseball where he struck out 10 and six innings and hit three home runs in a game clinching National League Championship Series. That it's just unheard of. He is without a doubt now the greatest that's ever played the game. And I watched that game again because I was up really early on. I fell asleep for a couple hours in the middle of night. Woke up at like 4. Like, I'm going to watch this again because it was on and I'M like, it was. It's when you know what's going to happen, it still doesn't seem like it can. That's unbelievable. Shohei Otani. And I text Tripp Saturday. I said, you do realize you were an eyewitness in person. Eyewitness to what people will be talking about for years. And so many times those games, you know, like, oh, I was there. You'll hear that years later. It's like, you know, 300,000 people had tickets to that game because suddenly he was actually there. That was the Otani game. That is. It's already got a name. It's four days old. The Otani game. This dude is unbelievable. Has been for years. But then to step it up and do that. Oh, my God. And on top of all that, the fun of the weekend, watching the Mariners and Toledo's hopes and dreams go crashing into the earth, and now it's a game seven. Oh, my goodness. The man was buying World Series tickets after they were up 20 and then got to go home for three games. Got this, they thought, now they're in Toronto for Game 7. Good news for the Mariners. And Toledo's incredibly tight, but which has. That thing has to be just. Absolutely. It's got to be ballooned up in a huge way. Oh, don't have it. Anyway, home teams in game sevens in baseball are 30 and 29. There's very little advantage. It's a weird stat. So he's got just as much of a chance to win it as he does to lose it. It's 50.

[Brett Vessel]

50.

[John Holmberg]

Like everything else. Nothing lean in one way. Thumb isn't on the scales at all. So good luck to Toledo. Cause all the pain. Dodgers held up their end of his World Series ticket bargain as he went and bought him for 2,400 bucks. He should have to. You know what we should do? We should punish him for being so stupid and jinxing his team. He should have to give those away on the air. Yeah. You're looking at me like the guy's got to get his money. And I know Brady on that one. But I think as a punishment, and he should, he should be willing to do it to appease the sports gods. To say, I screwed this up by getting way ahead of myself and buying tickets to a World Series my team wasn't in.

[Brady]

It's like a sacrifice.

[John Holmberg]

You sacrifice the money for and you go home and lie to Lisa, the whole family and say, oh, no, I sold them. It's good. And then pretend you need car repairs and the money had to go right to that. Just. You got to come up with some elaborate scheme. But I think he should have to instead of, you know, trying to make a buck off of. Because if he makes money and it.

[Brett Vessel]

Was a good deal.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Then suddenly he's running around going, I got a good day. You can't do that. You can't do that to your team, because then that just jinxes them forever. You become the goat in. In the Cubs lore and the black cat and all that stuff. You become the bad luck charm, the guy who bought tickets before, the dude who's got the tattoos on his arm of all the failed years. They thought they were going to do it, and he got it before they won it. Terrible idea. So good luck. All right, it's 601. VIP is the code word today for 6am and then we'll get another one at 7. So get on that 6am get you back in the habit of this and ready to go for another thousand bucks. Big doings over the weekend, though. It's kind of cool to lose. Got broken into in the coolest fashion I've ever seen. How much of this sounds legitimate to you? I'm gonna go ahead and say it. Let's say it's just, I don't know, the Phoenix Art Museum, and you're the one security guard at the Phoenix Art Museum. This isn't the Louvre in Paris. This isn't. Doesn't have the Mona Lisa in it. But let's say just for a weekend, the Phoenix Art Museum has the Mona Lisa, and you're kind of keeping an eye on it, right? You've got one job, and you see a truck with a crane in it. Pull up next to the building. You're gonna get suspicious for a second. Oh, and then the windows break, and you're like, huh? Guy's got seven minutes. A truck with a crane attached to it pulled up next to a building that has. It literally has no value on some, like, Napoleon stuff that's in there. They're like, we. It's immeasurable. We cannot tell you how much this thing would be worth. And they've got seven or eight items in there that they're like, it doesn't have earthly value to it. Like, you can't put a number. The crown jewels, the French crown jewels are in there. I mean, they've got all sorts of crazy stuff in there. And. And a guy pulled up, you know, in an F250 with a crane pole, you know, pulling a crane.

[Brady]

Like, 9:30.

[John Holmberg]

Break it. Yeah. Break a sec. In the daytime, break a second story window, get in there, use circular saws to cut through any of the things they need, grab a bunch of jewels and get out that the security guards did it. They. They did it. Like, you don't. Have you seen. You've been there. Have you seen the size of that building? Everybody thinks it's just that pyramid, that double glass. It's the giant thing around. Yeah, that's just. That's another art piece. The thing around it is the museum. And so in six or seven minutes to pick the right window to get in there and grab the things you wanted with circular saws and like that, it's the look no further than the dudes that came to work the next day going, ah, big, big doings last night, huh? Sacre bleu. Yeah, you did it.

[Brady]

They did it by there and looking maybe. Oh, I guess you got construction going on.

[John Holmberg]

No, people would know. Brady, do you know when we have construction going on? Like, if dudes pulled up with a crane and got to the windows and the next thing you know, one of the windows broke. I'm like, I don't think they're here to clean our windows. And then one sneaks in at 9 and chops up the office and takes my cam. Scatter. Boo. Jersey and leaves and be like. And I'm like, oh, no. Heavens to Betsy. Like, John's in on this. There's no question John's in on this.

[Brett Vessel]

What a Brad Pitt and George Clooney show up.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly.

[Brett Vessel]

Ocean's 14 now or what?

[John Holmberg]

Ocean's. Ocean's movies are more believable that they were actually, you know, no inside guy. This is the most unbelievably clumsy handoff of jewels I've ever seen in my life. And everybody's like, who did it? We have to bring them. It's like, just line up the people inside the deliver and have the. And just go. All right. When the view is a fifth. This is Pink Panther stuff here.

[Brady]

Check out offer up in the next week for a pair of air wings for sale Earwings.

[John Holmberg]

Are you all right? Oh, boy. Here we go. Here we go. But he's nervous because he's called Trip of filthy homeless, which I disagreed with. It's John Holberg here from the morning sickness, and I'm sitting with ShaneOrlando from OrlandoAutoBody.com. you see somebody with a dinged up car and you kind of feel like, why don't you get that fixed? What do you find is the reason most people don't come to you and get their car fixed when it needs to be fixed. When finances tighten up like they are lately for a lot of people. So what we offer now is 100 day same as cash on your deductible. We can finance that for you to help you out. So we're happy to help those people. Yeah. You got systems in place? Absolutely. We've been through this a few times in the last 38 years. You want to go to a place where everybody knows what they're up to. That's OrlandoAutobody.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness Podcast is.

[Dick Toledo]

Sponsored by Better Help. Back to school, Workplace upheaval, relationship stress, deadline anxiety. We all go through these moments in our daily lives that leave our mental health and wellness on shaky ground. It's Dick Toluto from Holmberg's morning sickness for BetterHelp. I personally have felt the benefits of therapy to get through a rough patch and to give me a way to navigate that tough time and a strategy to recognize when I'm not handling situations my best. And with over 30,000 therapists, BetterHelp is the world's largest online therapy platform. With BetterHelp, you can join a session with a therapist at the click of a button and switch therapists anytime to help you fit therapy into your life where it's best. As the largest online therapy provider in the world, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a broad array of expertise. So give yourself a helping hand and talk it out with better help. Morning sickness listeners get 10% off their first month at betterhelp.com that's BetterHelp. H-E-L-P.com Holmberg Holmberg's morning sickness yeah, to.

[John Holmberg]

Me, if you're, if you're a person who's got half a brain, you know that this thing is completely done by people inside. There's nobody from the outside. You can't have a truck pull up to any building ever. The Phoenix Art Museum security team would have stopped it in the second. They don't have security at the Louvre. They don't have, you know, any sort of Jesus the movie in the early 90s with Sean Connery and Michael Douglas's wife, Catherine Zeta Jones. They had to at least crawl through that sea of lasers great ass scene we got from Catherine Zeta John despite knowing that her vagina causes mouth and throat cancer. But it would for me too. A side note, if in fact that was a risky move, I'd still be down there on Catherine Zeta Jones in the 90s as much as Michael Douglas was. That gave him throat cancer. And Michael Douglas bragged about it. He said, you got the throat cancer? And he goes, yeah. The doctors tell me it's because I. I was eating too much, you know? And they're like, what? I was like, yeah, Evidently, if you do it too much, you get throat cancer. And everybody's like, I'd have done that, too. That's worth the throat cancer risk right there to get. You know, if you got it through smoking, shame on you. You through giving Catherine Zeta Jones a cat bath? Anyway, that movie taught us that security is, you know, you got to put a yarn room together and crawl around and learn how to. These guys just busted in with some dewalt tools and knocked it stiff. Oh, you found it. Brett found the scene. Look at this. In her. And he made her dress in the suit she was gonna wear. And then she's got a lifter. Oh, this is the actual break in. This isn't the yarn scene. This is post practice. Oh, each tile.

[Brady]

Yeah. But still.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my goodness. She just. One point. Yeah. Now lift. Yeah. You know what you're looking at, Sean? You don't care if those alarms go off. Pretty impressive. Yeah. See, and this is. I would. If there's videotape of this, send it to the masses. Yeah. Too good.

[Brett Vessel]

I'll find the urns.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's all right. Great stuff. When he's practicing, her ass goes down, down into one of those squares. Every dude in America in the 90s knows what I'm talking about. And I'm like, catherine Zeta Jones yarn.

[Byron (MMP Guns)]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Like all of us know all of us. And then Michael Douglas wrapped it up, swiped it, and wouldn't stop licking it, and then got sick from it and stuck around. She's still doing it. Here we go. Just laying there, squeezing it forward. He's just an incredible shape. It's the breathing. I didn't realize that. Yeah, the breathing's what get you.

[Brady]

It's very important.

[John Holmberg]

Well, yeah, you gotta stay hyperventilate. The director's definitely an ass man. Oh, yeah, director. Yeah. He likes. He likes fit women.

[Brett Vessel]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

So am I. Sean Connery is very excited about this young lady. I'm gonna lick that and get through a concha myself. It's the breathing. I didn't realize the breathing was so sexy. Oh, my goodness. This scene. What's the name of the movie? The movie's terrible, by the way. Entrapment. I've never seen it. Oh, it's awful.

[Brett Vessel]

You've only seen this part I've only seen this part. Yeah, I haven't seen the whole movie.

[John Holmberg]

You, my friend, have done it. Right. Because I sat through the whole thing thinking there'd be more than this. That's the height of it. And it's almost better than porn.

[Brett Vessel]

The breathing is breathing.

[John Holmberg]

Outstanding. There's some old man watching a girl crawl around. That's 10 minutes of cinema history. I am hard as a rock right now. You can call me the Rock, which is another movie I was in.

[Brett Vessel]

It's even got bad Cinemax porn music, too.

[John Holmberg]

I should probably do something about this boner. Oh, my God. I think I could watch this. Cardinal fans immediately. You'll be fine in a few minutes. Just entrapment. Catherine Zeta Jones yarn scene. How long is the scene? I don't know. Just jerking.

[Brett Vessel]

Another minute.

[John Holmberg]

It's three minutes long.

[Brady]

It is.

[John Holmberg]

I'm just watching this lady crawl around.

[Brett Vessel]

Listen to her breathe.

[John Holmberg]

Excellent work. Now let's drop those pants and see what you're made of, doll. We're ready. I'll tell you when we're ready. And give me a minute. I can't stand up right now. I'll tell you. And I'm ready. Man, oh, man. Yeah, that's good stuff. But museum break ins, that's what you get. You know, just bust in a window and a truck with a crane on it. Start swiping. Can't do it. Want to hear about another great heist that happened over the weekend? They caught a guy in the Luke Air Force Base stealing a woman's bra. After she was. She called him over to. She hired him to do some handiwork at the house. He might be a nominee for heel of the year. It's pretty close. So she had him over, and she's like, hey, I need you to fix some stuff. So then Julian Ramirez Mayo went out to the military housing area on the base. And she said she needed water repairs done while she was out of town. So they said, fine, I can do that. And if you're not in town, I'll just need a way to get in. So he got in there and he fixed the water problem. No problem. Then he left. But police said he was caught on surveillance video going back to the house, knowing that they weren't there, grabbing the woman's bra from the laundry and then taking it into their bathroom 10 minutes later. Probably thinking about that Catherine Zeta Jones scene. He returned the bra to the laundry room and left. And the news had to write the next line, which. I love that somebody debated this in a Newsroom reportedly the bra had white stains on it. Run it. He was arrested at his house Thursday. The paperwork said he admitted to stealing it and using the bra to pleasure himself. He also wrote an apology letter to the woman, so I'm sure she's thrilled with that correspondence. Little pen pal for the release. Yeah, Just in a bra. Anyway, he got second degree burglary, one count of voyeurism and his bond was set at $10,000. So he went in there and he tugged one off into somebody's cups. And then he put it. They'll never know he put it back. All you have to do is take the bra with you. I don't want to give coaching advice to a guy who's doing this. But what did you it in the laundry for? Why? She might have noticed her bra was missing. She's on vacation. She might have thought.

[Brady]

No, she might want more.

[John Holmberg]

Right. It's a calling card, bro. And why did you come back? They already weren't home the first time. You're a repairman, you're not on a tight schedule. I know repair men. I had one come to my place on Friday to fix the cable that blew off the house in the storm. The quantum link. It was one till five. I had to wait for him. He showed up at 3:40.

[Brett Vessel]

They wanted the matching panties. That's why he went back.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but he didn't do it. If you were there the first time, all alone, you tugging the bra that day.

[Brett Vessel]

I agree, but I'm.

[John Holmberg]

Then you break in and do the laundry.

[Brady]

You're on the clock.

[John Holmberg]

You're not on a clock. Repairmen are never on clocks. That can't take 10 minutes out to beat one.

[Brady]

I mean, you know, the first time you're there, you're. You're at the house. You got it.

[John Holmberg]

You're not on a clock. Repairmen are never on clocks.

[Brady]

No, but never. They're supposed to be there.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady]

The second time, he's not.

[John Holmberg]

That's the point. Oh, I see what you're saying. You're on the clock. I thought you said on a clock. No, you're on the clock. You're on the call Beat off when you're in the room and you're supposed to be. Nobody even known. She'd have probably put that thing on dirty and gone. Something's rubbing my nipple.

[Brady]

Scratchy.

[John Holmberg]

All scratchy. And my. I gotta launder this. No one would have known, you dummy. It's a three bird.

[Brett Vessel]

Somebody's been in.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, this one's just right. So you know when he was there the first time, he's thumbing around looking for stuff. And then he looked down, he goes, Jesus, it's 4:30. I've been here for three hours looking at bras. I gotta go. And then he comes back later, tugs it in your bras. Ladies, if you've ever had a handyman in the house and you let him have at it, there's a good chance that dude used your underwear as a tugging device. It's never a bad idea when all blue collar workers enter your home that are left alone to wash all of your clothes the next day. All of them. Every. Every one of them. Every single one of them.

[Brady]

He left that house and just started thinking about it after.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, I gotta get that bra. I gotta whack off in that bra. I'm gonna do it. They're not gonna be home till Tuesday. I mean, I'm gonna do it. Walked right back in there as, you know, as brazen as the Louvre guys. But they caught him like a day later because this. Ring cameras. Doesn't the Louvre have ring cameras? We can't see the truck itself. Come on.

[Brady]

Yeah, there's cameras all over that.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I'm saying. And these guys knew. And everybody's like, oh, what they could. They shouldn't have been able to drive away. All sorts of alarms should go off when a window breaks at the Louvre. I love saying it, though. Needs to be in the news more so we can talk about the Louvre more. It's like when white news people try to do Spanish accents. Now let's turn it to our meteorologist Jorge Torres and see what's going on this weekend. They have to do that with a break in. In Paris today. Oh, thanks, Mark Curtis. You nailed. Cracks me up. But anyway, VIP is the word. Keep on it. People just texting, saying, what's that word? Vip. Get you back in the swing of things for. For your big week. Trying to win money from us. And ladies, if you're putting your bra and Rochelle just says, ah, this is freaking me out. Yeah, if you're putting your bra on and there's a little scratch in it, that scratch has got a name. It's called Julian Ramirez Mayo and his last name is Mayo. And that's what he left in your bra. A little male from milk. I fixed her water. She can wash your bra. It's fine. And I'm wondering if she noticed it or if survival because they said surveillance cameras watched and put it back in the laundry room. And then they said it had White stains on it.

[Brett Vessel]

So this broad's house had better security than the Louvre.

[John Holmberg]

Than the Louvre, Yeah. This security system in her home could see a dude in a bra cup. We can't figure out the truck with a crane on it and what it was up to when it blasted through the windows of Livrach in Paris. Yeah, and he did it on the air force base, which is heavily armed. And, I mean, they got some cameras around. They caught him like, you know, not too far after that. But yeah, if your bra's a little itchy this morning, ladies, just think about it. And, fellas, sometimes when your underpants are a little bit stiff, maybe it's not just your batch. Think about that. We wouldn't even think about it. Handyman used our drawers to give himself a tug and then put it back in the laundry. Dudes would never know. Just assume. Did I do that? I must have done. I don't remember doing that in there, but all right. I must have left a little behind. Hot water. Yeah, wash it in. Hot water burns, baby. I've seen rain, man. I'm hot water and never gonna wash off the pain of another man's in my pants. It's not about the actual physical touch of another man. It's all about me knowing if I was a handyman and I wanted, I would leave notes in the house. I would break back in. I wouldn't actually do it. I think the here handyman who like this, the more sadistic and fun thing to do is to not actually tug one out, but to break back into the house and leave a note that said I somewhere all on your house, and you'd have to move if a handyman left a note and said somewhere in your house is my find the white Yummy.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

It could be in your clothes. Like a little clue. And then for weeks, just another note. Did you find it warm? Did you find it? Yeah. Yeah, like where I left it. You're very warm. I got to move out of this house. Found it. Here it is. No, that's mine. Damn it. Yeah, I did that a couple weeks ago. You have black lights out. You're looking for it everywhere, and you never did it. You just send these people on a wild goose chase for your and just know they're doing it. I'd sit outside with coronas and just laugh in the front yard. I don't like to give tips to guys like that, but still, good luck, everybody. By the way, who lets a handyman in their house all by themselves?

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, I don't that Ever happened.

[John Holmberg]

You might. I'll let you stick around here for a few days.

[Brady]

In the backyard. I've had people.

[John Holmberg]

Well, yeah, well, that's. They're not in the house, though. You're not going to let some dude in your house trying to stick the Rolodex. You don't leave handymen alone in the house. Somebody's always home or should be. Should be the wife, too. I always leave if there's a handyman at the house because it makes me realize I am not a handyman.

[Brady]

Cleaning service.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I wonder if. I wonder if Gloria rubs one out to my drawers every once in a while. I'm fine with that. Does take her a long time to get done. Yeah. Cleaning. Cleaning crews. I'll leave them. Not a handyman, though. Not a worker. I think I. I did leave air conditioning people there once to replace entire.

[Brady]

I've had them where I'm there on the call and I go, you left him alone? Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You left him alone, man. Probably. They'll be wrong stuff. Yeah. I wonder how many times any of our wives. Mothers. Have put on handyman stained bras. Oh, yeah, think about it. This is the dude who got caught. This isn't the only one who's ever.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, exactly. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, think about that. How many times Ronnie's like, oh, this bra, it's driving me crazy. That's because it's just filled with handyman ladies. Do your laundry today. All of it. Just start over, start all.

[Brett Vessel]

Bleach, everything. Yeah, bleach, colors, it doesn't matter. Just bleach it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you can get new stuff. Just go buy new stuff. Just throw it all out. If you've had a handy. Here's a guy with a ladder on his truck pulling into the parking lot. Now you know what he's up to later? He's tugging it right into those cups.

[Brady]

Oh, he's taking some jewelry somewhere.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, he's got a ladder. And the ladder just pops up and he busts a window. Like, that's when I'd be like, at 9 o', clock, I'd be sitting outside the Louvre and I watched. Oh, look, they're getting some construction and then they just shatter a window and climb in. And I'd be like, sacre bleu. Like the holes, the whole. Of course they are French. They surrender every time they hear glass breaking. They probably started speaking German again anyway. Yeah, think about it. Ladies and women always do that, too. When a handyman's there and they call their husbands. He's here and he's creepy. Yeah, he's a handyman. What are you gonna do? What did you expect, a tuxedo? The guy's been working, he's really dirty. Yeah, he's a good handyman. Good handyman, come in clean. I'd be concerned. They've been working their asses off. You let him give him a bra, let him get it out of the way early. Leave out one of your crappiest bras and tell him this is my favorite bra. I hope nothing happens to it. Let him hear that and then leave. And then just throw out your bra that you left out when you come home. It's a tip. Disgusting. So why do you think they call them handymen, John? Yeah, it's true. Because they're doing handies into your wives panties and bras like Julian Mayo. I don't like that. There's a guy parked out there with a ladder right now. See, I'm already better. I'm already better than Louvre security.

[Brett Vessel]

Because.

[John Holmberg]

I got my eyes on that. That doesn't, that's suspicious. That's never here. There's never a guy in our parking lot with a ladder on his truck ever. So I'm going to keep my eyes on that. Where's Louvre security?

[Brett Vessel]

What are they going to steal here, Trans Siberian Orchestra tickets or something? I mean, come on. Nothing to steal here.

[John Holmberg]

Oh my God, there's gay thieves. How will they work the ladder? And I also wanted to say congratulations. I gave them all sorts of heat on Friday. The no kings people and all those marches. And here we are Monday, we don't have a king. It worked. Nice job guys. Excellent work. I mean I, I poo pooed the whole thing but you couldn't have been more right. Kept the kings out they for a whole weekend. They're like we said, no kings. And I, as far as I know, people running for king have backed down. No king. Still, it was great. And also you, you didn't really muck up the roads too badly. You screwed up Scottsdale something fierce. Cause you were on the road yelling outside of the. And again it was 80 degrees outside. It was absolutely stunning weekend. And if you wanted to have lunch on the patio in any of the restaurants on Scottsdale Road, you had to deal with these hippies marching up and down, having no clue, dressed up like frogs. What are you doing? That's the Portland symbol for you're not in Portland, bitch. Take that off and be a grown up. And I'm telling you, you don't know.

[Brady]

Anything about the frogs.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they dressed up as frogs and furries and they had, like, uniforms.

[Brett Vessel]

Wait a minute. Wasn't that the KDK parade this week?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there was. They kind of mixed in there and.

[Brett Vessel]

They have the pride thing going.

[John Holmberg]

It was a whole lot of marching going on. I don't like marches. I don't care what the cause is. None of it. This one made me laugh because it was silly. And I saw him at the end when. At the end they just started hugging like they'd accomplished something. Nice job. Excellent work.

[Brady]

We'll see.

[John Holmberg]

Check the Internet and see if we have a king. We don't. Oh, my God. We did it.

[Brett Vessel]

You walked a mile.

[John Holmberg]

And it's the first time that's ever happened to most of them. Looking at the video, I didn't see a whole lot of shapely no kings marchers. You know why? Because they were enjoying the day. Stop screwing up streets for causes that aren't real or for causes that are real. Stop walking on the road. I've had this idea before. I've said it a million times. Do you want to do it? Fine. But we don't have to close the streets. People can drive through, so get over on the sidewalk. And they do that in Scottsdale. To their credit, in Scottsdale they hung around on the side of the street, which is pretty good. They stayed out of the way, which is all I'm asking.

[Brady]

They don't want to block the traffic going into PF Changs.

[John Holmberg]

Now that's a march. Yeah, the P F. Chang's to the White Castle. That's. That's a march right there. If you just stay out of the way and remain hardly noticeable, that's the kind of march I can get by. Here comes another truck with ladders on it. We got a collab going. We got something going on out there. I think we're under attack. Anyway, we'll find out. Let's get a wake up song in our king free society. I love it. It's beautiful. You give it to us good and strong. Five eight, five, nine, eight hundred. We'll scream it together. It's 98K. You'll be wake up.

[Dick Toledo]

It's out of control now.

[John Holmberg]

98. It's John Holberg here from the morning sickness to talk to you about my friends at Trajan wealth. A man who had quite a bit of money and a whole bunch of stuff decided to write up on his computer his will and trust. The day before he passed, he rewrote the entire thing. The old document was deleted and the new one was timestamped. By the computer one day before he died. The court told the man's son that the document wasn't legal. Call the team at Trajan Wealth. Sit down and take care of this so your family doesn't go through anything awful. Getting a plan together is so much easier than procrastinating. Call 480-990-3300. Trajan wealth legal services are offered through TR and the State Law Firm LLC.

[Brett Vessel]

We're here with Byron from M and P Guns. Byron, why should someone choose to go to M and P Guns?

[Byron (MMP Guns)]

The choice is simple, Brett. M and P Guns is your one stop shop for all your shooting needs. We offer Arizona's largest selection handguns, rifles, shotguns, new and pre owned. We also have a large selection of ammunition, accessories and even training. In fact, right now all pre owned firearms are 20% off. All new firearms are 10% off. We have Ammo Inc. 9 millimeter hollow points for only $12.99 a box and much more.

[Brett Vessel]

Well, it sounds like M and P Guns is committed to providing the customers with the best possible service and selection.

[Byron (MMP Guns)]

That's a fact. You can visit us at the store at the northeast corner of 12th Street Indian School at M&P guns dot com.

[John Holmberg]

You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you? PD Con creativity. Thank you. And that is our friends Kristen, Katie and Rich from Miles to Nowhere giving us our wake up song for a little while longer. As we are 11 days away from letting all these local bands know that they can start submitting for Platio and get ready for next year, they actually Kristen from Miles to nowhere emailed us and said hey Toledo. Emailed Toledo. Hey Toledo, it's Kristen from Miles to Nowhere. We have a little Monday surprise for you. With the next Palladio just around the corner and only a couple months left of our song starting off your show, we thought it would be a good time to release the video we made for. They have a video for that watch. Yeah. The song I didn't know this is called make your cock rice with the sun. I didn't know that either. We've had a great year and connected with a lot of people because of the opportunity you gave us. Sending out a huge thank you to you Holmberg, you, Brady and you Brett. Stoked for the final couple months of the track. Hope you guys enjoy the video we made for you. That's pretty nice.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Middle video. We'll take a look at that later. Are we in It. How come you didn't ask us to be in it? We'd have done it. It.

[Brett Vessel]

I'll pull it up, see if we're in there.

[John Holmberg]

Selfish. They just pulled pictures of us doing dumb stuff. Probably a few more minutes. I'm going to give you the word for seven o' clock on the app contest and get that together and roll out there and oh, I've given the word away. It's roll R, O, L L. Use it in a sentence. Roll your ass over here. Here. Roll. Not like roll model, like roll a ball. But that'll happen in about six or seven minutes. You can start loading it up at the 7oer. Get that thing going. I want to say happy anniversary, too, to people that I don't know really care about that much, but Dax Shepard and Kristen Bell. It was an anniversary, and Kristen Bell put out a. An awesome. And I don't know why anybody shares these things with the general public, but she said, she wrote on her social media. She said, I want to. I want to say Happy anniversary to a man who once said this to me. And then she quoted him, I would never kill you. A lot of men have killed their wives at a certain point. And even though I'm heavily incentivized to kill you, I never would. That's fun. That's funny. It's, you know, it's a husband and wife playing with each other, having a nice moment together. For some reason, everybody feels the need to share everything with the world. So she put it out there. And of course she's in trouble because October is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. And they're like, please don't joke about it. And it's like, you know what? I know domestic violence isn't funny, but when the guy shoved that stick in your ass, I think you can pull it out now that's enough. Because domestic violence isn't funny. And he was making light of the fact that despite feeling sometimes like it's all collapsing around you and it would be easier if she just wasn't there. And if you've ever been married, you know that's true, that your brain sometimes goes, you remember that Dateline episode? Like, stop it, brain. No, seriously, she likes to play around with flammable stuff. She doesn't even know it's flammable. We can make this go, stop it, brain. We're only mad for that now. Lunatics stay mad. Has nothing to do with Domestic Violence Awareness Month. They had a funny moment. The thing I most. And actually, Dateline did a great thing. And Screenshotted their thing and put it on Dateline's Instagram, which is even funnier. You have to have a sense of humor sometimes about stuff that hurts your feelings. These trigger warnings and all these things like, I can't watch someone else have a good time with something that bothers me. Calm down. Domestic violence awareness. He's never hit her. We need to celebrate her. What he said was, I sometimes want to hit her, and I never will. That's a win for Domestic violence Month, Brett. You joke about it all the time. You've never hit her. That we know about, and that's awesome. Every guy out there would love the opportunity at one point or another to slug her. It's in our nature as men. Ooh, this all ends if I just slug her. We don't do it because it's wrong. Women want and sometimes do hit their husbands and get away with it. And I don't blame them. Most of the time, they're swinging for all the right reasons.

[Brett Vessel]

Where's OJ when we leave him?

[John Holmberg]

You know what? That's the guy we should talk to about this. Oh, get summoned him, Brett. Here I come. Hey, hey. What's going on, guys? That was a rough entry right there. I tell you what. Happy Domestic violence awareness about the man. Oh, man, am I aware of it. I tell you what, who was more aware of it for a little while and then stopped suddenly with my ex wife, Nicole. She knew all about domestic violence awareness, you know where and then she wasn't. Anyway, happy anniversary to Dax Shepar and Kristen Bell, because I think that's beautiful when you can joke around about killing your wife. You have a perfect relationship. It's when. It's when they can't take the joke, you know, it goes too far. I just want to let you know that today's a good day to text wife and say, you're still alive. You're welcome. All right. That's all I'm saying. I should write greeting cards for this month. I think that's great. Anyway. How you doing, Brady?

[Brady]

Good. Good.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Good. You know, Brady, people would want to kill you sometimes.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And you're still here. You're welcome. I mean, that's that.

[Brady]

Thank you, juice.

[John Holmberg]

There's no person on the planet that doesn't have somebody thinking about killing them right now.

[Brady]

It's pretty true.

[John Holmberg]

You get up and you go to.

[Brett Vessel]

Work, and that's it.

[John Holmberg]

You're probably laying next to the person.

[Brett Vessel]

That wants to get.

[John Holmberg]

What do they say there, Brett? Familiarity breeds contempt. That's how it is. You lay next to somebody every night and eventually they want to contempt you. I guess that's what that means. Anyway, happy domestic violence. And happy anniversary to Kristen and D. Still standing after all these. No scars that we've seen. All right, I gotta go. I'm just saying. Yikes. He sort. All right. He sort of comes out of nowhere, that guy. Come on. You can't possibly be mad at that. Very funny. And people were like, I can't believe you would joke about this.

[Brett Vessel]

Shut up.

[John Holmberg]

I can't believe this is something you people to think is funny. Meanwhile, they're the same people that can't stop clicking on Bianca Sensory naked every time Kanye allows her out of the house. And like, ooh, she's crazy. Like, no, she's one you should be focused on. I don't think she's concerned for her. Yeah, yeah, yeah. If you're going to have concern for Dax and Kristen, who are fine, by the way, ask Carvana. They're good. Although in that Carvana, Adam confused because she keeps telling him to wait to sell the car. You know, know hold.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And if you watch. It's just the prices.

[Brady]

Sells it at a lower level.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it starts at 19,000 and sells at 17, which, by the way, I'm not sure they've got a $17,000 car. His podcast is very good. I don't think they're driving around in a Pacific.

[Brady]

Are the kids old enough to drive now?

[John Holmberg]

Maybe. I mean, they're picking up a first ride for one of their babies real early, but she screams at a hold. And then she goes, bam. Sold it. And if you look, look, even the grid is just pointing straight down. I'm like, she sold it for less than the initial offer. Like, what is she doing? No, it's trying to break a record or something. I don't have time for those people anymore.

[Brett Vessel]

For Deck and Kristen.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no. First off, I have to give them a little heat, too. Keep that to yourself. Your anniversary wishes that are funny. Tell that story to friends. If you're on a talk show or the podcast. Or the podcast. But there's no reason to publish it. You're only asking for that. You're trumping it. You're basically trying to troll people. It worked. But the people you don't want to troll in this world are the leaders of the Domestic Violence Awareness crew. They are humorless and rightfully so about domestic violence. And if you give them an opportunity to respond, it's not going to be. That was hilarious. It's just not going to happen. And then you got them up your ass, and everybody's like, all right, we can't yell at the domestic violence people. They've been through a lot. It's hard to tell people who have been beaten. Lighten up. Or us. You don't want the business end of this. Shut your mouth. You can't really tell a woman who's been domestically violated to be quiet. They used to have the domestic violence exhibit in guadalupe, Arizona, which I. We made jokes about constantly. It was a very strange single wide trailer with domestic violence awareness museum. So it had the best of the best in there. And it was just. You go in there, it was just a series of. Of t shirts and wife beaters and things like that. It's like, oh, it's just the outfits that these guys wore. I guess that's kind of like the hall of fame for football, except for instead of uniforms, it's their. It's their tank.

[Brett Vessel]

Did you guys ever go in?

[John Holmberg]

I. I tried to go in once, but it said by appointment only. And Jay Moore tried to go in once, and we just made jokes that it was a guy sitting in the thing going, where's my dinner? It was just reenacting every time he wanted it. You always open that mouth of yours. The only thing I want to hear coming out of your mouth is, get my corn. And then, you know, he rattled around. But if you walked up to the. Did you never went in?

[Brett Vessel]

I never went in.

[John Holmberg]

Used to walk up. He had little fake tombstones. Oh, all in the front yard. It was a downer of a place.

[Brady]

I heard they had one of those boxing gloves things when you open the door.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. You get clunked in the head. That's what you get. Where'd my supper? And like, just pictures of Dwight yocum and other country legends. George Jones known for activities around the house. Anyway, it seems as if you can have a sense of humor without getting harassed. Asked if you stay off social media with your funny thing when it comes to your own personal life.

[Brady]

I thought it was a stat from the domestic abuse awareness.

[John Holmberg]

Well, they don't need to be starting to throw those out. Just say happy anniversary to Dax and Kristen and then start your own campaign. What's the stat?

[Brady]

A girl or a woman is killed by a man known to them every 10 minutes.

[John Holmberg]

Same girl.

[Brady]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, that's just poorly worded there. That's not fun. So stop it and let people who are having fun remain having. I didn't even know, to be honest with you. I am now, as of right now, aware that it is Domestic Violence Awareness Month. I didn't know that. That's because I don't pay attention. He's right. I should listen. Roll is the word. The seven o' clock word. So get on that on your app and put it in that promo code there, too. All right. It's time to talk about what everybody's talking about. I've given you enough time. Let's get on this. Let's talk about the Ed Gein thing that's going on on Netflix. Been number one for now. First of all, every guy's doing the impression, we'll do it for the squares. I'm not gonna waste time fooling around with it right now. And it's very good. But Ed Gein, if you watched it, you watch it all the way through, you finish it. It.

[Brady]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Finished last night. Have you seen it yet?

[Brett Vessel]

I started it last night.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Here's the thing that. Because I talked to Larry about it on Thursday, I think people are missing what's going on here. This is not the Ed Gein story. There's no. There's a lot of fake stuff in it. Yeah. On purpose. Like, they're doing kind of bothered me.

[Brady]

At first, and then I was.

[John Holmberg]

What they're really doing is pointing the camera at us, saying, you're the monsters. This is you. And they've been doing it the whole time. And it kind of clumsy. In a weird way, I'd get it. I'd knock points off for not really expressing that well, to where all the articles you read about are like, half the stuff in this didn't happen. It's because they're making Ed Gein story entertainment. Like Ed Gein spawned all the entertainment. Essentially, they're saying, thank you, Ed Gein. Cause if it wasn't for you, we wouldn't have Psycho or Texas Chainsaw Massacre or Silence of the Lambs or Mindhunters or all. If it wasn't for Ed Gein. None of these guys that followed up doing this. This were. Would have, you know, given us this kind of awesome entertainment because we are addicted to murder porn. And it was at the end they start to kind of clumsily explain their whole thing of like, no, we love this stuff. Half the stuff that is talked about with Ed Gein didn't even happen. They even admit it's like, I have things you think happened, didn't. If you go back and look at the factual evidence of it and you can make it up, so long as it's entertaining and salacious. People will mop it up, up like, you know, bread and gravy and eat it and then start talking to their friends about it. This documentary, this, this not documentary, but this whole series on Netflix is essentially telling all the viewers to go themselves. It's a little bit insulting in a weird way to go, you like this, huh? It's like being tied up and force fed something that you like that people think might be wrong.

[Brady]

At the end of it, you're gonna like it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You're gonna. Yeah. And they. And that was the weird thing. Thing is, it's like we even took it to the level to say, do you know how sad and depraved this story actually is? This is a real human being who slaughtered people, wore their skin, did terrible things. You've turned him into an entertainment thing. And he struggled mightily with it. Like, you want to get into the real part of it? Here he was crying to his therapist. They have that on tape about, I just don't know. I don't know what I am him. Like, why is this a thing? And I don't know. I don't remember. And he was studied and studied and studied. So then they put that awkward moment in to say, you like him? Do you like him now? Because we can manipulate every feeling you've got. And it was uncomfortable, disturbing. It was uncomfortable because you don't want to watch that, to be told you're gross. But that's what it did. And I love that stuff. I am a murder porn guy. I like serial killer stories series. I'm fascinated. Not so much with the actions, but why, like, why does. Why does another human being's brain not function at all the same way? Almost 99 of our brains function to where you could actually start to boil women's body parts and learn how to skin them properly? And. And that is what we've turned into entertainment. And that's what that's about. Ed Gein started it all as far as the. The media. Jack the Ripper was one that everybody was fat, you know, fascinated with. But Ed Gein was the first one. We had pictures and we had a morbid fascination that was, you know, satiated. We got to. We got to see it. And it was, you know, on the heels of World War II and all those pictures that nobody saw till later. Ed Gein was the first one. Like, in the paper they were showing the. They never showed that in the, in the Netflix stock. But he, he made a. Like a lounge chair, sewing together a bunch of Women's stuff, like a full on couch and you can go online and look at. And it's the morbid fascination. Megan had a good point at the end of that. She turned to me and she said, I wonder if we'll have serial killers as much in the future as we do now. And I said, why do you think that? And she goes, because moms let their kids wear their underwear now. Like, oh my God, there's something to that. Because all these serial killers had a fascination with their mother's panties.

[Brady]

Made me look into Richard.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Richard Speck is a crazy. They made up a lot of that. They never communicated once.

[Brady]

But on this, I, I went and looked, you know, the Wikipedia, because he was talking about his boobies.

[John Holmberg]

Richard Speck took hormones in jail. It's a well known mask. Yeah, yeah. He wanted boobs in jail.

[Brett Vessel]

There's videos of him with his cans, beautiful cans.

[John Holmberg]

But he never, he. He never even was really inspired by Ed Gein. But what they were making, the point is, was this monster series. You're interested, so let's just make them all one. Because if it wasn't for this guy, you wouldn't be interested in this guy. The dominoes fell, starting with Ed Gein. And now, you know, and I'm doing it around the house. And I think everybody is the. If it wasn't for all the harlots that are out there, we wouldn't have this problem. Mother, can I have something to eat? They're like, oh, everybody's doing it.

[Brady]

What disturbed me at the end was, you know, all of a sudden he's finally dying. He's like, finally. You can have peace now.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

And it was like a celebration.

[John Holmberg]

It was the parade that was for us though, that was for the, for the people watching, going, here's all the things that would. Here's all the guys that would. The. The murderers row, literally, of superstars of murder. And we all were like, e. We just did an O.J. thing. Like, we are fast hall of fame, man. It was. He's going down a hallway and you just see Charles Manson, Richard Speck, Bundy. Bundy's waving in there. His, even his character from Psycho. A couple of the victims. Yeah. And he's like, hey, great job, man. Thanks for everything. You started. He's the Babe Ruth of this genre. And it was less about his story and more about like, you guys like this. We'll make some stuff up too. You won't care. And it's true and it's weird.

[Brady]

Does it want to make you spin on to the next one. Lizzie Borden.

[John Holmberg]

Hells, yeah. I can't wait. But Lizzie Borden's just. Who knows?

[Brett Vessel]

I don't know much about that one.

[John Holmberg]

Well, Lizzie Borden just chopped her parents up with an ax, right?

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

She wasn't a serial killer. She was a lunatic who lost it. She's abroad who lost it.

[Brett Vessel]

Typical broad.

[John Holmberg]

Typical. She was a typical 1800s broadcast. One of them. Typical 1800s nut job with an axe. Yeah. They let her have an ax. And, like, there's mistake one. She was like. She was like the poster child for pms. I think she was the first one that had that. Yeah. But I. I kind of looked at it and I'm like, this was a thank you. Remember when we made the joke about how Cuba Gooding Jr. Should have thanked O.J. for killing all those people because he won, like, six awards playing O.J. in the. That series on TV. Like, if it wasn't for O.J. cuba wouldn't have had a career resurrection if it wasn't for O.J. doing what he did. And David Schwimmer wouldn't have gotten to play Robert Kardashian. All those guys got jobs and huge paychecks thanks to OJ and this was the first, like, series that ever said, thanks, Ed. Thanks, buddy. Quite literally, billions of dollars have been made from his legacy because of Ed Gein and what he started and created. And the Psycho movie was, like, the first one to go. Let's just kind of borrow some of what he did and scare the hell out of people. And we eat it up. Alfred Hitchcock couldn't have been more right. Everybody told him, no one is going to want to see this. And his. His quote back. And they kind of used it in the movie. But back in the day was, you kidding me? Dracula, Frankenstein, and now a monster is us.

[Dick Toledo]

Us.

[John Holmberg]

They're gonna eat this alive. They're gonna. They're gonna love this because this is. This. This is actually scary. And we can show them real played Alfred. Oh, he was perfect. He was fantastic. But, yeah, he. They kind of danced around what Alfred actually said about Psycho back when he was making it. And even, I mean, his wife and all his agent. The movies, they're like, we can't make this. This is horrible. This is a human being killing another human being on screen. And it's like. Like, for no reason, like, nobody's going to want to watch this. Like, everyone's going to watch this. And it's. The dominoes fell for me. But if you watch it. Yeah, I Think you have to, because Larry was telling me his sister hated it. And she, like. She said it was slow and, like, it wasn't accurate. And I'm like, they're not going for accuracy here. They're going entertainment. It is. But they're also going to make you feel like a knob. And at the end, you're like, yeah, little self inventory on this one. I'm guilty as hell of this, of what they're accusing me of here, which is taking a very real thing. And it's not made up like Dracula and Frankenstein.

[Brady]

It's kind of. Yeah, kind of, you know, slow at times. And then I didn't. I took in the last couple of episodes to wrap it up.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you don't watch.

[Brady]

But I can't.

[John Holmberg]

You didn't watch all of them?

[Brady]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you skipped ahead.

[Brady]

I think I opened up with the first three.

[John Holmberg]

And then you just jumped to the last. How many are there? Eight.

[Brett Vessel]

Okay.

[Brady]

Yeah, I think I missed two.

[John Holmberg]

Why'd you do that?

[Brady]

Because Ronnie kept watching and we were watching together, and she continued on like, all right, I'll pick it up.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah. Well, yeah, you're probably not going to pick up the subtext and that. If you're just watching, you're going to be bored because it's jumping around. But it was pretty awesome because they get to the points in certain areas where they're, like, slashing somebody, and then it cuts to, like, if it were real. Like, what inspired the psycho shower scene? What inspired the scene where the grandpa with the skin mask is hitting the girl in the head in Texas Chainsaw to kind of remind you, oh, this really happened. But here's what it would look like if it was the people who really did it instead of the movie. You remember? It's pretty awesome. And I've forgotten until the thing that. The moth thing in his house, when they went in and there were moths. They use that for science. It's crazy, but it is a very interesting kind of societal. Yeah, it's flipping it on us, looking at us, going, we'll keep doing it. But you guys realize what you're up to, right? Like, this is real. Like, we're not. We're not. This isn't pulled out of thin air. This is a real guy. And this actually happened where he had dead skin masks, like, loads of them, and he put them on to feel what it was like to be inside a woman. And his therapist that said it was the ultimate way of penetrating woman since sex was taboo. Like, to be inside of a woman. That way is much better.

[Brett Vessel]

Hey Byron. I heard you have something new to announce from MMP Guns, Brett.

[Byron (MMP Guns)]

I sure do. It's MMP Guns. Customs M and P Guns is creating some amazing firearms. We offer polishing, plating, bluing, custom laser engraving, laser stippling, cerakoting and performance upgrades. We do everything in house with our master trained craftsman. Craftsman. You can select our designs or make up your own.

[Brett Vessel]

Well, can you do this to my gun?

[Byron (MMP Guns)]

We can do it to nearly any firearm. Doesn't matter where you live, you can ship it to us or. We already have completed firearms in inventory daily with no wait.

[Brett Vessel]

Well, there you have it. MMP Guns on the northeast corner of 12th street and Indian School or online at mmpgunscustoms.com It's John Holmberg here for.

[John Holmberg]

My friends at turfmonstersaz.com oh my goodness. My backyard is perfect now that I've turfed it. No mud, no maintenance, no sprinkler repair. No sprinklers. I have a lower water bill and I have a yard that looks perfect all year long. But that's not all. I've got a putting green, I've got a basketball play court. I've got an unbelievable situation. And I owe it all to turf monsters. If you can dream up a backyard that you've always wanted, Turf monsters is the place to call Turf Monsters AZ.comberg's Morning sickness. But I'm wondering if there is some truth to the idea that making all these kids out there that would have been serial killers comfortable in their mom's underpants and shoes. Because I forget the guy's name, that he was the lust something killer. He does a brief. I can't remember his name ever. But he used to cut off women's feet and steal their shoes. And he only did like five people.

[Brady]

And he'd fill the shoes.

[John Holmberg]

I think that was an exaggeration of him. Yeah, he used to talk about he'd use them like that handyman used that lady's bra. Yeah. But he would, you know. And that's a very serial killer thing with that mayo guy did. Which is, you know, beaten off in a bra. Usually it's Clark. Who?

[Brett Vessel]

Doug Clark.

[John Holmberg]

No, I forgot his name. Big dopey weirdo too. But yeah, he chopped the women's feet. It was kind of cool.

[Brady]

Just over to the. The. Was it Mind Hunter? Whatever. The other series.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Which was another.

[Brady]

That behavioral study of serial killers where they started interviewing them.

[John Holmberg]

Those were real people as well. Yeah. And so it was. I mean, none of it is. Jerry Brudos is the dude's name.

[Brett Vessel]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Jerry Brudos was the last killer. Yeah. They did the mind hunter thing because that was the way that the FBI and all these other people were trying to figure this out. Like, we can't have this. Like, what are we missing with this? Like, there has to be signs and signals all the way up to a certain time. And they found them them based on the interviews they made with Edmund Kemper and they didn't put Kemper in this one, which I thought they would have. But yeah, tons of like, you know, tons of bashes on the head of the viewer, which made me feel uncomfortable because I am the guy they're talking to if they're serial killer stuff, fascinated by it and it's not and I'm not to the level of listening to. You know, if there was a time when podcasts had Joe Rogan kill Tony and the next eight were murder podcasts and the, the top 10 in the country and then you look at the top 80 and it's just non stop murder talk. It's changed a little. But people love that stuff.

[Brett Vessel]

On Samsung TV they got just three or four channels and that's all episodes.

[John Holmberg]

Of Murder everything thing.

[Brett Vessel]

I watches it every night.

[John Holmberg]

So does she. She's fascinated about and real life murder. We don't want made up imaginary stuff.

[Brett Vessel]

Not into like slasher movies and stuff, but real. Yeah, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

The stuff that actually happened for some reason we love it. Yeah. It's a very strange thing when you watch because it's, it's designed, it's very rare for entertainment to turn to the audience and go, you are all sick. And that's what this did. But then it, it's flipped on, on its head. And I'm kind of wondering 30 years from now if we allow kids to wear their mom's bra and panties the way we do now and make it okay. If that does kind of make it so they're not so repressed and they don't start slaughtering people. Maybe one of these mothers that's just their kid's best friend that hears the three year old go, I think I like your panties and goes to have ass. It just saved lives. Dress your son and his mom's panties today and see what he does. If he likes it. You, you're saving lives.

[Brady]

But statistically not that many.

[John Holmberg]

What do you mean?

[Brady]

So many that wear them.

[John Holmberg]

Serial killers that aren't serial killers. Oh, sure, sure. Well, that's. Yeah, they're a very passive group, but still look, you get one Brady, and that's all you're looking to do.

[Brady]

You're dabbling in a kind of a weird behavior.

[John Holmberg]

If you got 10 or 11 kids are like, you know what? Mom's panties feel pret good. Thank you.

[Brady]

Sure.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe you just opened up a Pandora's box for this kid to start questioning himself. But if you're. If. Especially if you're religious, if you're super religious, that also ties in. Put your son in a pair of your wife's panties. And if he starts looking at you like, this is okay now, you just saved lives. You just saved.

[Brady]

Maybe you need that officer like that spoke to your school. That goes around that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brady]

You're wearing your mommy panties right now.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that was the best thing that ever happened. You're going to be a. He would point out to the front row. One in 10 of you is going to die before you're 17. One, two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, dead. Like, oh, no, it's number 10. It's not always just in that. One, two, three, dead. Five, six, seven, eight, Nine. Oh, my God, I got it. And then we'd count it out. Burkhart's gonna die next. Yeah, you never know. But statistically. Statistically, dudes who are, you know, repressed by their mothers and religion and then. And get caught in their panties nowadays, they're like, yay. Back then, it created Ed Gein and Ted Bundy and almost all of them. Ed Kemper. All of them dancing around with repressed mother issues. Mom's doing number on you mean ones. So you got a kid this morning. Lay out some laces for him. Just go, what do you think of these? And if the kid looks at you like, is it okay? Like, yeah, give it a try.

[Brett Vessel]

I turn on all these easy.

[John Holmberg]

And he puts. Yeah, he puts it on. And then you're like, I kind of like this, mom. It makes you feel better. It does. Good. I'm saving lives. It's a good thing. Just know that your mom doesn't care if you're wearing her underwear. I don't know. There could be some correlation. We can't figure it out. Because you're right. Most people who are trans, man, I ain't going around killing people. Most time they're self. Harm, harm. But yeah, it's a weird doc. It's a. I want to call it a documentary, but it's not because it's like the Dahmer one was pretty damn accurate. Like, they went down the list when they did the Dahmer monster on Netflix. And it was like, this is what happened.

[Brady]

That was more of a reenactment.

[John Holmberg]

Well, yeah, it was just like. It was a telling of the story. Ed Gein was a telling. Plus his delusions as reality, plus his girlfriend that never happened, plus all that. You know, it was just kind of a. But it's number one on Netflix and it's making its point by being number one. And Brett just started it last night, so it'll stay number one for a little while longer. And the point of it is, is that we could put out anything about Ed Geen. You guys are going to watch it. And they did. And it is fascinating. And you go on the Internet and all it is is memes of him. I'm going out drinking. I go, jeez, now it's funny again. I like that kind of stuff, though. I like when they're extra smart about stuff. Although that one to me was.

[Brady]

I think that kind of. That's why it kind of bothered me at first, like, because I wanted to learn more about it. Then you find out this isn't. This didn't happen this way.

[John Holmberg]

You know everything you need to know. And that was another point it makes, is you don't need to know anything else. Psycho told you what you need to know. Silence of Lambs told you what you need to know. You're not interested in the real reasons he became this or anything else. He had a crazy mind. He kept her. Her dead body. It wasn't even hers. He kept her dead body in the house. He dug upgrades. He, you know, and they made him a necrophiliac in this. There's no proof that ever happened. And like, they just, they added stuff because it's like you'll buy it and you'll be sickened by it and you'll watch more.

[Brett Vessel]

It's all about entertainment.

[John Holmberg]

It is all about entertainment. It's great. It's crazy. This guy said, I gotta log back into my account. Give me the word again. It's roll. You have a few more minutes for roll. Yeah, it is. It is. It's us. And sometimes we kind of stink. Speaking of stinking, I was also on a thing this weekend where I saw Ozempic. Vagina is a problem that women are having. I'm loving this Ozempic. They don't want to. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That's exactly it. The fat brew. So it makes sense that when you drop all that weight, what women are complaining about after their Ozempic speed loss is saggy cans, extra skin.

[Brett Vessel]

We Complain about it, too.

[John Holmberg]

Sure. Yeah, we're complaining, you know. So now you go from being at least to yourself, unattractive and overweight to at a good weight. But your vulva have taken a beating somehow. Ozempic is deflating vulvas and making them droopy. Droopy?

[Brett Vessel]

Well, won't be taking a beating much longer.

[John Holmberg]

Good news is they're going to tighten back up from a lack of use. So what? Would you rather be fat and have a nice vagina or look good on a scale, but the whole thing's hanging down there like, you know, some sort of an Arby sandwich?

[Brady]

I'll take the droopy.

[John Holmberg]

Ted, would you take the droopy if you were a woman? That's a bigger deal than you think. I know.

[Brett Vessel]

What are my choices again?

[John Holmberg]

Here you can be fat and have a nice one. Right. High and tight. You can be thinner. But your vulva, you got the Ozempic vulva. And they're. They're Arby's out. They're Big Montana. I know.

[Brady]

What are you gonna get more action with?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I think confidence in a fat body.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett Vessel]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I think that's better than the.

[Brett Vessel]

I might be Rocky practicing for Apollo.

[John Holmberg]

And speed bag that thing. Oh, yeah, papa. You think you go there and this.

[Brett Vessel]

What's going to attract you? I mean, you don't know it's there until you get there.

[Brady]

Yeah. You're not.

[Brett Vessel]

You're not even going to take a look.

[John Holmberg]

Right. Points for bread on that one. You don't know until the pants come down.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett Vessel]

And then you're like, all right, well, I'm here.

[John Holmberg]

She's melting.

[Brett Vessel]

I'm already here.

[John Holmberg]

And what you're saying is with the big girl, you already know when it's naked, it's not going to be good. Right. But what if a big.

[Brett Vessel]

No disappointment, because you're already disappointed going in, which is Broadzilla.

[Brady]

And if you're a big girl and you already have that, then.

[John Holmberg]

Well, if you've already. Fine. Look, if you've already got it as a big girl, imagine what's going to happen when your body deflates those. Those are going to be like jump ropes, Elephant Man. Two little Twizzlers that have been melted by the sun hanging off of the. Come on, man. So it's a tough one, but there's a way around it trying. Oh, right. Oh, we don't do that anymore, actually. Not taking a drug to throw your body into a massive decrease called EOS Fitness Diet. Exactly. And it's not for medical reasons. It's because you're just vain. It's faster and it's easier. I get it. But there are side effects to the thing that you're taking that is a side effect for what it's really made.

[Brett Vessel]

For John, I'll take option C. I'm leaving the car on.

[John Holmberg]

When I close the garage, he's just gonna kill himself. But it would be tough for a woman if the doctors are like, you're gonna lose a lot of weight really fast. Hell yeah. Your vagina is going to look like. Like a. Ever seen a Stake them out of a pan, man? Oh, my God. Yeah, you're gonna have that going on. Ever seen one of those Fruit Roll ups if you leave one in the sun? Oh, no.

[Brett Vessel]

Hungry Man Salisbury.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's a good one. In A Hungry Man. And the apple pie runs into the Salisbury and makes that weird kind of hole in the middle. That's what you're gonna have down south. But you're gonna. You're gonna weigh a good amount. Your weight is gonna be great. But my vulva's gonna blow up. Blowout would be more accurate, but yes, I'll take it. I don't think that's on the.

[Brett Vessel]

You'll be surprised on a lot of men when they pull them pants down.

[John Holmberg]

I know. I used to. I used to weigh 300 pounds. You look so hot, baby. I like you the way you are. I'd rather not just take my panties off, though, because it's. Have you ever seen, like when a fridge loses power and all the butter melts into the meat and then you open the fridge and it's all glopped together. I'm not turned on at all anymore. You're making me sick.

[Brett Vessel]

You got to listen to Harbor Freight toe straps.

[John Holmberg]

Have you ever seen a basset hound hang its head out of a moving car? Yeah. What does that have to do with. Well, I don't want to show you, but yeah, that noise is real. You say you want to hang it out of the car? We could air it out before if you're interested. Are you familiar with pigs in a blanket? Because that's what this is gonna look like.

[Brett Vessel]

Hanging out the car, feeling like one of those used car sales.

[John Holmberg]

Did you dried up yet?

[Brady]

It's almost mountain fresh tucked into those yoga pants.

[John Holmberg]

Hold it over neatly like she worked at the Gap for a few years. Ozempic Vagina China. It's real.

[Brett Vessel]

Matthew wants to know, are we talking meat curtains or just slightly slight droopiness?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no, according to the article, it is pretty hard to see. Yeah. You know, you've seen a few of them are like, well, that's. That's a little off. Evidently. This is like Jim Rose, circus bat, you know, where things are being tugged down to the earth. Like she's on a planet with more gravity than you and I. But it's. They're very excited about it. And if, you know, the. The alternative to that is. Is losing it a little slower, but eating right and jogging and stuff.

[Brett Vessel]

How dare you.

[John Holmberg]

Tends to be. I know, I'm insensitive. I get it. I get the quick fix. I'm all for it. But there is an alternative. You know, it's a big time alternative. It's not a great alternative. It kind of sucks. It's like when people say, how do we stop teen pregnancy? It's like abstinence. And I'm like, yeah, okay. How do we actually stop it, though? Because abstinence is. It's out there, you know, human nature. They're not going down that road, man.

[Brady]

That's. That's not the only one on the epic.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, we went through the other one the other day with the issues. The sulfur burps and the dryness. Oh, yeah. No, it's a mess.

[Brady]

Infections.

[John Holmberg]

Yep.

[Brady]

Pelvic floor weakness.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, the whole thing can come tumbling out.

[Brady]

Atrophy.

[Brett Vessel]

It's like the Tropicana imploding or what.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, it would. It would be. And then it would say, welcome Las Vegas athletics. The A's are there. They'll tear it down to build a stadium. Yeah, the atrophy is true in all your muscles with that. If you read about Ozempic, it takes your bone density and your muscles out. Just. Just working out, eating nothing, Right? Well, they trying to work out. Yeah, but if it's crushing your muscles when you get fat again, and you probably will, it's going to be all fat because you won't have anything to counter that. And then your heart's in trouble. Sudden weight loss is scary. It's working. And I'm not talking about people who need it for, like, medical things. I'm talking about the people who are doing it. Because, you know, especially, like, the weight loss, there's that. There's some reality show with some sisters, and I don't know their names, and they're all thin models and they take it and they're treating it like the sisters are treating it. Like they found one, one of them's on heroin. She's like, are you still on the GLPs and like, yeah, it's like you're dying like. And she is. She can't. She can't remain upright. She has nothing left in her system but she's got to do it. So she's not an ounce overweight weight. And because she does, she doesn't like eating anything now. She just doesn't eat. It's terrifying. And I bet you her vagina is like hanging down to the ground. It would look like Ed Gein's barn is basically just a bunch of parts just flopping around, just dried out. And it's gross. That ozempic vagina. We have a name for it now, guys. And you can start making fun of it there. This guy says, I've lost 65 pounds with some discipline and intermittent fasting. So yes, there is an alternative. Yeah, but I mean could have done that in a couple weeks. I mean, sure, you're be tripping over your own nut sack after that, but still you walk through the south side of Chicago and people want to use your labia as a double Dutch. It's like you've got too much. We bought your jump ropes. Oh, these are my labia. I'm sorry. Sorry. I just drag them behind you, try to cover them up and they'd be like a fire hazard. Like when chains drag on the back of a truck on the way to Payson. Oic vagina. I can't wait to hear a guy. Good band name, kind of. Yeah. Sponsored I think he gets trouble. But I like. Yeah. Oic vagina is pretty. The, the album cover would be phenomenal cuz it would just be like melted things.

[Brett Vessel]

Do a cover. I melt with you.

[John Holmberg]

Ah. Oh.

[Brady]

Oh.

[John Holmberg]

That's the COVID of that. I can't wait to talk to one guy. I know. It's like, yeah, I dated this girl. What happened? She seemed nice. Yeah, she was great. And then she's got ozempic vagina. Like, oh, it didn't work out. Nah, she couldn't climb through all that. It was like a gauntlet of vulva. I can't go in there. It was fighting back. It's like an octopus. Just stuff all over the place. So good luck to you ladies with your ozempic vagina. I find it hysterical. And then somebody always brings up Hope Solo. Remember Hope Solo's thing? That was Internet craze for about two years back in the aughts and everybody had picked. We all know what it looks like because it scared us all men. And if we were innocent, all of us thought Hope Solo Was attractive. She was the goalie for the U.S. women's soccer team. We're like, hope Solo's hot. She looked like she was half cat, half woman. She had these crazy eyes. They were like piercing a little bit like cat shaped body was insane. And then naked photos of her got released and she looked like somebody spilled spaghetti on the floor. It was everywhere.

[Brady]

Top five red gel.

[John Holmberg]

Looked like somebody opened up a revie. Oh, it was all. Imagine if she had had those things fall apart. That was naturally that way. Just beat up to the guy she.

[Brady]

Was sending that to.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that poor bastard. He had to say, hey, you know, keep it from the waist up. I'm trying to finish here. Not. God, you're disgusting. So just letting you know, like ladies and men. I don't know what happens to men too. I don't. Can't be good. If women's vulvas are falling apart, your foreskin's gonna.

[Brady]

That guy laid low.

[John Holmberg]

It's gonna look like a turtleneck.

[Brady]

He's like, I like that.

[John Holmberg]

And maybe a guy would like it. Maybe some dudes do like what Brady or Brett said and just speed bag away, but not me. Are you looking at pictures of it of Hope Solo? It's. You hadn't seen it?

[Brett Vessel]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Brett, welcome to 2008. Oh, that thing is tattered.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

There's a couple of them that are super close.

[Brett Vessel]

Bagging is going on.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, there's some. That one. That's the one that always got me. Oh, no, no, not that. Dead center bottom. Worse. Dead center bottom. That. Oh, that one. Yeah. Oh, my Lord. Oh, what? What happened? It looked like it's Hubba Bubba stuck to a wall.

[Brady]

There's no protecting that goal.

[John Holmberg]

No, no. Everything's getting. Man, you can put those big hamburger helper gloves on all you want. Oh, I gotta. There's plenty of space.

[Brett Vessel]

I gotta clear this off.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, get that off your history. And you know what? I don't say this a lot. Go to church. It's 7:33. What do you got on the big board of musical treats there, Brett?

[Brady]

Wake up.

[Brett Vessel]

Song brought to you by Action Ride Shop, of course. And man, it was a great weekend to go riding. I didn't get a chance. Perfect outside, but the weather's amazing, so now's the time to hit the trails. And no better place to start than would be at Action Ride Shop. With two locations right there on Gilbert Road and Southern. Or of course, the brand new one right there at power Road and McDowell right off the Haas trailhead. Haas Trailhead's a great place to ride too. So make sure you hit up Action Ride Shop for all your needs. Actionrideshop.com or just go visit Josh and the boys. They're take care of you.

[John Holmberg]

Glorious on the list.

[Brett Vessel]

White Snake. Here I go again for the cards. AC dc Shoot the thrill for the handyman. Avenge Sevenfold Hail to the King. For all them morons that were protesting.

[John Holmberg]

Screwing up our streets.

[Brett Vessel]

Smack my up for Prodigy. Self explanatory.

[John Holmberg]

Yep.

[Brett Vessel]

Dead skin mask from Slayer.

[John Holmberg]

That's pretty solid.

[Brett Vessel]

Kiss coming back and then tons of.

[John Holmberg]

Limp Bizkit and the Limp Bizkit thing. Their. Their basis passed away on Friday evening. Saturday. Yeah, he died. So let's do some Limp Bizkit. Cuz that's a little tribute tip of the cap to a band that gets a lot of heat.

[Brett Vessel]

Do Faith or.

[John Holmberg]

No, let's do. Yeah, whatever. If you pick it. I'm fine with Faith. That's fine too. Their new one's not bad. We could throw that too. Yeah, I'm not. I like. Let's do Making Love to Morgan. Okay. Their new song. Is he on this? Yeah, he's on the. So he was up till.

[Brett Vessel]

He's up till the end.

[John Holmberg]

I mean.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Had a liver transplant from what I read. Yeah.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And then that was like 2015. It was a while.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, that was 10 over 10 years ago.

[John Holmberg]

So he's, you know, didn't. And it wasn't drinking or anything. I didn't.

[Brett Vessel]

No, it was apparently originally it was from drinking and destroyed his liver. And then he cleaned up, got his transplant and he's supposedly clean since, but.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know, you know, maybe it just started to get. And just go sideways for him. Either way.

[Brett Vessel]

48.

[John Holmberg]

48 years old.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Well, you drank yourself. You treated yourself pretty poorly. If you need a new liver in your 40s, early 40s, late 30s. 30s, you've been doing some work to make your liver hate you that much.

[Brady]

38.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it was 2015, 10 years ago. So yeah, he had a liver. Which means he was sick at like 36, 35. Probably got finally that. Yeah, that's. That's getting it done. So he abused himself. So 48.

[Brett Vessel]

And the guys from Metallica are still holding on, man.

[John Holmberg]

Rolling Stones, Metallica. You just gotta figure. It's crazy. Here it is though. It's making love to Morgan Wallins, the new one from Limp Bizarre. And yes, they will be included in the night of the Singing Dead on Halloween. Count that. It's 98k upd Arizona's most powerful powerful rock radio station. This is Michael with Restore My Civil Rights. I made a lot of poor decisions in my past that had lifelong consequences. After I was released from prison for the last time in 2014, I discovered the process to have my convictions dismissed and all of my rights restored, including my Second Amendment rights. Since achieving this for myself in 2018, our attorney has assisted over 3,000 others in doing the same. If you are still living under the consequences of past mistakes and would like to restore your rights as I have, visit restoremycivilrights.com and book a free consultation today. It's John Holmberg here, seeing clear as a bell. Thanks to my friends at the Schwartz Laser Eye Center. If you're squinting or cleaning glasses with that little microfiber rag all the time, well, just knock it off. I was in the same boat as you then. I went to the Schwartz Laser Eye center, sat down with Dr. Jay Schwartz, and in one visit, Dr. Jay Schwartz had a plan for me that allowed me to ditch needing glasses to see. It's as easy as opening your eyes. Give them a call 480-483-EARS and then head to the Schwartz Laser Eye center, the official eye center for your diamondbacks and sons. You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. That's the pumpkins right there. Brad was just talking about that. Billy Corgan's podcast is interesting. It is, and I have never listened to a full one. But the clips and stuff of his interviews, Pretty damn good. He does a good job with that stuff. Surprising, because you'd have thought he'd be almost angry. I don't know why I picture Billy Corgan as being less of a.

[Brett Vessel]

He's still smug, but he's.

[John Holmberg]

He's good, but like a above it all kind of mad. Yeah, and he's not. He's kind of down to earth. I remember he did an interview with Stern years ago and somebody sent it to me saying, if you heard the new album, it was the Ele's album, which is actually really good. Tommy Lee's on it. It's really weird, but he was just fascinating. And he's Bill Burr's brother. People forget that. They won't admit it, but it's a very true, weird story. The guy had kids and named them both Bill. Like George Foreman. At 7:55 and five more minutes, we're going to give you another word to qualify for the Take it in the app full on promotion that you guys are head over heels in Love with. By the way, paying you is a good idea. We should do this more often. A thousand bucks we'll give to the winner if they take it in the app properly. And all you got to do is put the word I give you in the proper box. The promo code on the app. If you click on take it in the app. Eight o' clock's word. Come on. Coming up in a couple minutes. I'll tell you now. It's show S H O W, not sh. But welcome to the big show sh. And that'll be ready to go in a couple of minutes. I'm still like, just, I, I. I'm not a Dodger fan. I'm not a. I, I hate the brewers more. But watching this thing this weekend and then just see that you're like, you know what? I want that guy to have all of it. I want to see what else he can do, if he's capable of pulling off what he just did. That is the most remarkable thing I've ever watched. So much so, who watches the baseball game two times in a row? I watched the night before and then again that next morning because I just had to see, like, what. Like, I got a. I didn't know what was going on while it was going on. So going back and revisiting it is. It's. It's unreal. The Ohtani game probate, you're dealing with the. The best people who have played against the best team in the National League. The brewers were the best team. Made them look foolish. It was incredible. You didn't even have to like sports. You just go, that might be the greatest thing ever. On the flip side, also, we talked about Ozempic vagina. He said, john, are you telling me that after Ozempic, women's vulva turn into Holmberg scrotum? And I didn't even think of that. There's some of them that get Ozempic vagina, and they touch the water when they sit to pee. Because I sit to pee, and I'm down in the drink, too. It's crazy. You don't want vulva in the drink because I know how it feels when the water touches your balls. It's awkward. And then you do that little pinky hook and get them out of there. I don't know how you double down pinky hook those things.

[Brady]

It's bacon in the Bloody Mary.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yes. Drop down all the way. It's. You're garnishing the toilet is what Brady's saying. And then a couple of them just Grab hold and it looks like a chocolate hot dog. I'm sorry. Ozempic. Ozempic. Vulva is not worth it. I think I'd rather be fat. Anyway. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady reported, brought to you by our [e-mail] All Pro Shade is the place to go to get your back patio. Like another room on your house. Adding all sorts of value to your home and getting that area that you think is too sunny. Maybe too much glare. Maybe the neighbors can see it. Maybe it's just east west sun and keeps the inside of your house a little bit better off. That's what I got going right now. I got to get some in mind. And I got a plan of mine as well. All pro shade will take care of that area in your house and beautify your home home and make it ever so beautiful for you and maybe even the next person who owns it. Property value increase right there. All pro shade.com that's where you need to go. Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Monday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world. Hi, Happy information overload day.

[John Holmberg]

Got a lot of that.

[Brett Vessel]

It's like every day.

[John Holmberg]

Yep.

[Brady]

And back to the future day.

[John Holmberg]

Just. Oh, it was today. The day that they went. October 20th. 20th.

[Brady]

October 21st.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's tomorrow. Tomorrow. Well, we'll have fun with it for a day. All right.

[Brett Vessel]

We're gonna pregame.

[Brady]

I see where I made the mistake because it's 10 things that happened on this day during this week 10 years ago.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you did a this week?

[Brady]

Yeah. Got ahead of myself.

[John Holmberg]

Is it still. Well, the first one. Well, the first one, yeah. All right. Yeah.

[Brady]

The other ones are the week or that you are not specifically day. Like on the 20th. Oh, it would be this Week in October. Okay, 10 years ago. Let's get to some basic fun facts.

[John Holmberg]

Facts? You have the nerve.

[Brady]

A caterpillar called the tobacco hornworm uses bad breath to scare off predators. It eats tobacco leaves so it just breathes smoker's breath on the predators.

[John Holmberg]

That was rude to smokers, Brady. I'm sure it's worse than that.

[Brady]

There's no copyright or patent protection on magic tricks. If a magician invents a trick trick, anyone's free to use it. You just have to figure out how it's done.

[John Holmberg]

That's why they never give their secrets away.

[Dick Toledo]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

They figure something out. It's up to you to figure it out because otherwise everybody would be doing it and their act gets screwed.

[Brady]

A study in 2012, found there had been more than 200 academic papers published on Buffy the Vampire Slayer, which easily made it the most studied TV show or movie. Movie. The alien movies were second with around 90 papers.

[John Holmberg]

90 a second. Of all the things that get around the universities, man.

[Brady]

Here's 10 things that happened 10 years ago in this week.

[John Holmberg]

You sure?

[Brett Vessel]

There we go again.

[John Holmberg]

10 things that happened 10 years ago on this week.

[Brady]

Or this week?

[John Holmberg]

Week.

[Brady]

Just this week.

[John Holmberg]

You've already been confusing enough.

[Brady]

All right, we'll skip.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no. Don't be a baby uppity Brady. Do you know how hard it is to listen to what you're trying to do when you're. Do you understand that I have to kind of guide that? Because what you just said was very confusing on top of that.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, you better.

[John Holmberg]

You should. You absolutely should. I'm the uppity one. All right, keep going. Wow. Yeah. If you're gonna get uppity with me, I can get uppity back. Baby be. I'm just saying it was very confusing, and you just confused us before.

[Brady]

You're confusing me now.

[John Holmberg]

I'm not. I'm actually really clear correcting you.

[Brady]

I understand what you're saying.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Good.

[John Holmberg]

And I appreciate.

[Brady]

Couples there.

[John Holmberg]

Move on.

[Brady]

Teal Pumpkins took off.

[John Holmberg]

Teal.

[Brady]

Teal.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I thought you said. I'm just. I'm just clearing up.

[Brady]

The Teal Pumpkin project launched in 2014, but 2015 was the year it took off.

[John Holmberg]

Are they real? Yeah, it's kind of like died them after they came out.

[Brady]

YouTube Red debuted 10 years ago on this week.

[Dick Toledo]

Is that the porn channel? What is YouTube?

[John Holmberg]

Red Tube is porn lets you watch.

[Brady]

Videos without pop up ads for 10 bucks a month.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Eventually they called it to YouTube Premium.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Baby Hitler was trending worldwide.

[John Holmberg]

10 years ago.

[Brady]

Yeah. The question was, could you kill a baby Hitler? 42% said yes, 30% said no. 28% weren't sure. It just got Baby Hitler trending on social media for a few days.

[John Holmberg]

That's easy, right? You weren't sure. You didn't know if you would kill Baby Hitler? Yeah, I'd slaughter him every. Every, like. Like lunch meat, really thin slices. Like they put them through one of those machines, those push machines, the slicers. If you knew it was Hitler and you're from the future, this is easy. You'd let Hitler go on knowing that?

[Brady]

No, as far as the act of killing would be tough, that's why I'm saying I'd be un. Like, don't ask Me to do that.

[John Holmberg]

But in the case. But you're the only one who can fit in the machine. It's a very specific.

[Brady]

I'm the only one that I have to.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And you have to go back and they're like. If you see Hitler as a baby.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And they give you a picture, they all look like this. You'll know he's got a mustache. You don't. You don't think you could do it.

[Brady]

When you put it like that, it makes it like, that's my job.

[John Holmberg]

It's like a mission. But let's say you got in the time machine. Nobody knows you invented it. And you came across and you popped over.

[Brady]

There you are.

[John Holmberg]

Whoa. I'm an Austrian. It's like 1902 or whatever. 1880. Whenever he was born. And then.

[Brady]

Yeah. I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

And then you find out his name. You see it in the maternity ward. For whatever reason, you took your time machine and then started to visit maternity wards for the breastfeeding, I'm guessing.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, absolutely.

[John Holmberg]

And then you see one and it says a Hitler.

[Brady]

But then you get into the debate of. Now you're changing.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

History.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

The ripple effect.

[John Holmberg]

For better.

[Brady]

You don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you do. How could it get worse? And if it did, because you killed Hitler. What stopped that other thing from happening? Hitler didn't make things better for being there. You think that you'd come back and go, oh, I should have never killed Hitler. Things are a lot worse. That it would be. It would be. Yeah. Different.

[Brady]

Or does someone pick up that torch? There's another Hitler out there. Or I don't.

[John Holmberg]

You know, Pretty solely focused on getting his message out there. Sure, he had some followers, but it would be easy to kill that baby.

[Dick Toledo]

World War I still happens. I don't think the follow up happens.

[John Holmberg]

World War I would probably still be a thing.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

He didn't have anything to do with it. World War II was basically him saying. All right. Right. You ready, Germany? We're doing it again.

[Brett Vessel]

Game on.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Game on. Hold my beer, world. We're coming at you again. Here's the sequel that was almost all, like, his influence and his ability. Yeah, I could. I could slice and dice that baby like nobody's business. No. Other babies. I don't think I could kill. Maybe Pol Pot.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Couple of those dudes. You know, you give me some. Some reference points now, Ed Gain only, you know, that's just a singular murderer that could screw something up that could mess up time.

[Brady]

King Ludwig, that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That just slaughtered Everything?

[Brady]

Yeah. For the diamonds.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I can't imagine that the focus of eradicating an entire group of people that if I went back and killed baby Hitler that it would be like, oh, I shouldn't have done that. It's worse. Like he was. And then you find out he was like a necessary evil. I don't think that's possible.

[Dick Toledo]

According to Brady Scott, it is God's plan.

[John Holmberg]

Well, it is part of his plan, that is true. But also we've been through quite a lot of things that did and did not happen and we're still here pretty much doing the same crap. So.

[Dick Toledo]

What do you mean didn't deny?

[John Holmberg]

Well, I mean, if Hitler didn't happen, how different would the world have been?

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, people are asking for the eight o' clock word.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I gave it a show. S H O W you.

[Brett Vessel]

Showtime. Shame.

[John Holmberg]

Showtime. Shame.

[Brady]

There's a new record.

[John Holmberg]

Surprised it died after 10 years.

[Dick Toledo]

Texter says. Don't you think Stalin would have taken up that void?

[John Holmberg]

No, because he. Yeah, he was doing it to Russians. He didn't really have the whole world domination thing. He just wanted to be Russia, the altar. He wanted to be a God to his people. And maybe you would have, but he was. Wouldn't have gotten as far as they did.

[Brady]

A United flight from Denver to LA had to make a 90 degree turn and land in Salt Lake City Thursday morning after something happened to the windshield. One of the three layers on the right side shattered. Bits of broken glass got all over the cockpit. Someone got their hands on photos. One of the pilots had cuts on his arms. They were cruising around 36,000ft. It's not much that it could do when it hit, but they think it was space junk.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, got hit by space junk? Fallen from the sky and hit a plane. Wow.

[Brady]

You see the point of impact in the photos? Maybe some scorch marks, but that's what there's either saying that or maybe it's a meteorite.

[John Holmberg]

It's like a couple of pilots are going to be over at Rhodesio Grill.

[Dick Toledo]

What if. What if that's like aliens just taking pot shots. Like that's their version of BB guns.

[John Holmberg]

That's got one. It's a good shot.

[Brady]

The FAA says the odds of space debris hitting your plane and killing you are one in one trillion.

[John Holmberg]

That's low. I'd have figured it was higher than that bazillion because it's a. I mean the plane.

[Brady]

134 passengers on board and they are all. Okay, okay. Plan. Landed in LA later that day.

[Dick Toledo]

Texter says, I may have missed the beginning to this, but did Brady just ask a Jew if he would kill Hitler?

[John Holmberg]

It's a good point. Not a real Jew, but I'm still Jew. Like Jewish, as they say. And I certainly would have killed Hitler. It just seems like the Right. And it's only. You say that I was like, well, Hitler was. It's only because it affected the United States. States. There's been dudes in Asia and Europe before we were a country and Africa who have slaughtered loads of folks and genocides and things like that. And it doesn't register the same as Hitler. Pol Pot is equal as he's horrible. The killing fields are like the most unbelievably disgusting attempt to eradicate a people. But it doesn't affect us because we weren't involved in it. So we think Hitler's the word.

[Brady]

We.

[John Holmberg]

We. We got along just fine. Fine.

[Brady]

With all the rain we've got last week, neighborhoods have noticed there's a lot of toads going around.

[Dick Toledo]

Is it toad time?

[Brady]

We have when I walk the dogs at night, toad across eight or ten a walk.

[Dick Toledo]

And these are the bad toads, Right.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know.

[Brady]

Well, sky toad problem. Because poison control officials had to warn people, quit licking the toad. Toads. People, evidently. Yeah. Because they're trying to get the little buzz off licking them.

[John Holmberg]

That's been going on for years.

[Brett Vessel]

Go hang yourself.

[John Holmberg]

I'd be curious.

[Brady]

Also, we've had an increase of mushrooms.

[John Holmberg]

I'd lick a toad. Come on. Well, the problem is too much.

[Brady]

Yeah. The director of Banner poison Control looks like Hope Solo. I'm not looking. If you find the Sonoran toad. Basic desert toad toad, or also known as the Colorado river toads, to try to get a high. You could die from it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. My. My deal is I'm. I'm not going to lick.

[Brady]

Also, don't let your pets lick.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I don't allow wildlife and I to meet up and start fiddling around with each other. Yeah. I don't. If it showed up, I'd be like, look at that. And I'd probably move it with my foot or something.

[Brady]

And don't eat the shrooms that have grown.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That come out of your carpet and stuff.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

I've seen these.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I don't. If somebody had a toad and everybody was licking it and I saw it, I would fall for the peer pressure. Be like, all right, I'll do it.

[Brett Vessel]

You. Only you won't eat public food, but you're gonna lick it.

[John Holmberg]

No, no. It would Be shared toad.

[Brett Vessel]

Like we get your own toad.

[John Holmberg]

They're licking toads. And there's a fresh one over here. All right, I got an unlicked toad.

[Brett Vessel]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

Not following up. Licking it.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, I was gonna say community food and all right.

[John Holmberg]

Holmberg's morning sickness. Holmberg's morning Sickness. It's John Holmberg here seeing clear as a bell, thanks to my friends at the Schwartz Laser Eye Center. Let the experts at the Schwartz Laser Eye center do that. Book your complimentary consultation with the gang at the Schwartz Laser Eye center and have Dr. Jay Schwartz talk to you about the best plan to make it so you don't need contrast contacts or glasses ever again. Great eyesight is something you should not procrastinate getting. And all you have to do is go see the team at the Schwartz Laser Eye center today. Schwartz Laser Eye Center. The official eye center of your Diamondbacks and sons. Hey, gang.

[Brett Vessel]

It's Brett Vessel from the wildly successful Morning Sickness to tell you about quality car stereo. If you have a motorcycle, UTV or a boat, any fun or even not so fun mode of transportation, Quality car stereo can make that sound system fantastic.

[John Holmberg]

You took me down there, Brett, and I was blown away at what's available. And most folks think their cars can't have new sound systems because of fancy displays.

[Brett Vessel]

Actually, it's easier than ever to upgrade your system. But don't just go anywhere. Go to quality Car Stereo on Sauceman and Baseline in Mesa or check out.

[John Holmberg]

The Website Quality Car stereoaz.com Holmberg's Morning Sickness.

[Dick Toledo]

Unlict Toad. Is that a band name?

[John Holmberg]

That's just too confusing.

[Brady]

Charman is bringing back their forever roles. Huh? Roll a toilet paper. Paper. The typical roll has 77 sheets on it. This one has 1700.

[John Holmberg]

It's awesome. I got.

[Brady]

They fit on the roller. You can buy a roller. They got a thing that you can buy for 38 bucks.

[John Holmberg]

Here's the thing. I'm buying this Japanese toilet right now, and I got to get the electric in the bathroom straight. And I mean, this thing is insane. And the guy I was talking with goes, goes up at Hughes, he goes, just get a forever roll. I said, what the hell is that? And he showed me. And he goes, you might need toilet paper again. I'm like, what? And he goes, stick with this thing. You might need toilet paper again. This is a one stop shop. And he knows me. So he's like. And especially because you go in and shower up afterwards, you're going to be spotless back there. Like, I already am. But the feeling ruling of that 21 roles. Yeah, it's. He goes. He told me you might someday.

[Brady]

You should see it on the roller.

[John Holmberg]

It's amazing.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, my God.

[John Holmberg]

As Kiefer says. Of course, Schuberg says it's easy to kill baby Hitler because then the Jews would own everything. Oh, wait, they still do. It didn't matter. It's true. Then Jonathan says, good to see you guys celebrating Domestic Violence Awareness Month by beating up Brady for stepping out of line and talking wrong. Yeah, that's true. That's the Forever Roll. Huge.

[Brady]

Oh, my God.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Worth it. You got a pack of six. You can. You got to put it. Yeah, you got to put it in your will because you're not getting through those. They call Kent over Trajan. Hey, man, I got too many Forever Rolls. This is a problem we're facing a lot, John.

[Dick Toledo]

Many for Revel Roll roles.

[Brady]

Got a couple of radio videos. First one's a dude that's being hired for a kid's birthday party dressed up as. Not sure the costume. Okay, but he's taking a couple surveys down before he does it.

[John Holmberg]

Ooh. This is not a. That's a kid.

[Brady]

That's a adult, man.

[John Holmberg]

I was gonna say he's got a full beard now.

[Brady]

The mascotry contends. Kicks a kid down.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's bombed. Oh, he's in the full mascot suit, just guzzling, bruised. He goes by and just takes a child, tries to kick him again, and then stomps him. And what character. I don't know.

[Brett Vessel]

I don't know. He's American History X in that kid.

[John Holmberg]

He curb stomps and tries twice. Is it the beer or is it the outfit? Because he tries to look around to see what he just stepped on like in mind.

[Brady]

But the beer doesn't help.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's not. Actually, it does. It makes him forget his. His miserable life. You're an adult who dresses up for kids parties.

[Brady]

Next one is a little roof jumping into a pool.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that roof's giving way. That's a nice pool, though, so. But it's in the Middle east somewhere. It's not Dubai. And he jumps and he. It's a shallow pool, isn't it?

[Brady]

Plants of pretty good.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, his friend's gonna try one. Yeah, the first guy, great dive. Second guy, slip. Oh, right onto the side. And he scissors one foot in the pool and one foot on the deck, and he lands directly on his taint. He's out of the water, seemingly unfazed.

[Dick Toledo]

He's got internal injuries.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no, there's definitely a hospital visit. Coming to check to where his balls are in his chest. But still, man. How about the third person waiting their turn up on the roof?

[Brett Vessel]

No, I'm good.

[John Holmberg]

First dude does a front flip, lands it. It's beautiful. Look at the land. Look at where his balls hit. Slice. Oh. One leg in, one leg out, and he hit the edge of that pool. Oh, my God.

[Brady]

Last one is the beer can race. That's happening on hockey rinks. And think it's only college hockey, but this looks.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, the beer cants are dressed up mascots as Coors Light, Truly Bush. I don't know what the other two are. One's a white claw.

[Brady]

Now you gotta make the turn running.

[John Holmberg]

All the way down to the cone at the blue line. Oh, down goes the. Truly's down. Bud Light's down. Coors Lights down. Bud Light actually stayed up. Oh, boy. Bud Light takes the lead. And here comes Coors. Takes drops. The Bud Light drops it itself. They're sliding towards the finish. If they could just get up all blazing by Bush Light for the win. Oh, Bush Light is your. That's the best thing ever. I love it. Next son's game. They need to put ice on the guy's feet and let them run across the floor and do that. Oh, that's phenomenal. Pretty fun. I like that one.

[Dick Toledo]

That's not mullet, is it?

[John Holmberg]

No, that's. No. God, no. They don't do that. They don't have hockey anymore. I know ASU does, but nobody goes to it. That's a crowd and stuff. Is that college? Yeah, that. We said the.

[Dick Toledo]

I think it's. I think it's minor league hockey.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's awesome is what it is. That's the best intermission thing I've seen in a while. The cans are racing. All right. Is that it?

[Brady]

That's it.

[John Holmberg]

All right, Brett, what do you care about?

[Brett Vessel]

All right, let's start off with.

[John Holmberg]

By the way, Genghis Khan's kill is 40 million. Mao Zedong is estimated between 60 and 80 million. So Hitler's a just baby compared to what the old dudes was doing. So it just. If it affected the United States, we're all up in arms about what we would do about it and act like it wouldn't change. It would drastically fix the problem. So you'd still want to kill baby Hitler. He gets an awful lot of attention for a dude who, you know, was horrible. But the guys who were worse than him, you know, kind of just forgotten pieces of time. Because the United States didn't ever fight him. We're sort of self centered that way. All right, all right.

[Brett Vessel]

This guy just dicking around, looking at.

[John Holmberg]

Instagram or something, standing next to some pallets of stuff. Oh, here comes something. Oh, it's a big chunk giant crane from forever ago. That's like a dinosaur crane. It's the biggest thing I've ever seen. What is that? It's a pipe from the sky.

[Brett Vessel]

I don't know if they. Is that like, rebar from a building or something?

[John Holmberg]

He hears something falling, he ducks, and it hits him.

[Brady]

Yep. Then he's standing by the.

[Brett Vessel]

I don't think so, because I think this stuff.

[Brady]

Watch this there.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, is that him?

[Brady]

Pops up on the head.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, maybe.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah, Yeah, I think that is him.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. That is. I don't know what that thing is, but if it starts raining those, we're all done.

[Brett Vessel]

Wow. Oh, yeah, he did get away, man.

[John Holmberg]

He snuck out to the bushes.

[Brett Vessel]

That go to Vegas tonight, pal. You are the luckiest man in the world.

[John Holmberg]

He might have used it all up right there. Wow.

[Brett Vessel]

All right. Morons taking pictures in front of you already know how this is gonna happen.

[John Holmberg]

Bicyclists are by a train, and a train's going by, and they've got their cameras out and they're doing selfies piece, and one of them's too close, leaning into the tracks. Don't go. It got her. You could see it.

[Brady]

Just dumb, dumb.

[John Holmberg]

Don't her friends tell her. You would think that they were like dopey European travelers, too. All right.

[Brett Vessel]

There's some kids around messing with fire.

[John Holmberg]

Quit being a. All right. Terrible. Oh, my God. One of them just put something in the box. Oh, his face is on fire. His face is on fire.

[Brett Vessel]

Braden's hair's on fire.

[Brady]

Look at the hair face.

[John Holmberg]

His whole face, everything. His face burst into flames. What are they putting in that fire? They're like Harry Potter.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They put a wand in the fire and Harry Pottered the whole. The forest. Oh, my.

[Brett Vessel]

Apparently, this is what good housewives do while you're at work.

[John Holmberg]

Okay. Oh, she's in a nice yellow dress. Very pretty girl. She's vacuuming the. I thought all. Cleaning carpet. She's in her underwear, and she's crawling around around like Amy Poehler. Oh, geez. She's taking the vacuum to her. Her love bits. She just took her underwear off.

[Dick Toledo]

She says ozempic. Watch this.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, she goes ozempic lips on this thing. Oh, my God, lady. She took her vacuum and is just pointing it onto her Body parts. And I don't even think that would feel good. Try it at home today, ladies. And text dtoledo98kupd.com there's some scuba diving for you. All right. We're by a pool going to pre dive safety check for scuba div. Oh no. Wow. Now we have not expected jump cut to someone in some sort of very old scuba gear and almost torture device. And a. A guy's wiener is out of his scuba suit and it's going into the breathing apparatus of the person inside in there and their glasses are fogging up. That was a. It's safe to die. We got to do one of what happens next. Yeah, that was a what happens next. All right, here's just.

[Brett Vessel]

This guy's just.

[John Holmberg]

Here's a penis lazy on a remot control car and he's got one of those. You can buy the fake lips and stuff. He's put a camera on top and he's just driving. Guy's got a hog and he's driving the. He's driving the car with the sex toy on top of it. Back set up.

[Brett Vessel]

He's got the tripod up here and.

[John Holmberg]

You know, I mean two camera angles. Yeah.

[Brady]

Spent more on that equipment than the kitchen.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. The. Wow. Yeah. Brady's not impressed with his kids. That's all we got. But Brady, when you've got a hog like he's got Scott, you don't need a kitchen. The lady will make do.

[Brett Vessel]

Absolutely.

[John Holmberg]

He's going to figure it out. And also door dash. Cuz most of the time everybody in that house is pretty worn out. He's so bored with women. He's inventing stuff. He strapped a sex toy to the top of a remote control stomper and it worked. I'm impressed. Excellent job. The word for the 8 o' clock hour is show. S H O W. It's that easy. You put it in the little promo box and you're off and running. Maybe gonna get yourself a thousand bucks. We're buying your love. And we're doing it an awful lot every hour. In fact. We've got another one coming up at nine. Get ready. Show is the word for eight o'. Clock. It's 98. There goes your Brady report. Holmberg's morning sick sickness. Ah yes. It's the Biscuit is going through a thing there with the Biscuit. Having their morning period right now because they lost their base player over the weekend. Running a little hot for a long time. Oh, the Hitler debates. By the way, the word still is show for another five minutes, you can pop that in the 8 o' clock promo code register to win that money. Tons of people going back. Trust me, I know. Killing baby Hitler. Here's the thing. If you had a time machine, you went back, killed baby Hitler Hitler, you'd be nothing but a baby killer. Hadn't done anything yet. No one would know why you did it. But if you had a time machine, you could leave. I wouldn't kill baby Hitler if in fact I had a time machine and it stayed there and it stuck. I'd keep my eyes on Hitler until he started doing Hitlery things. And then like, all right, here we go.

[Brett Vessel]

Better have enough plutonium to get there.

[John Holmberg]

Plus I'd. That's right. Plus I'd also have landed in Germany. Germany. And would have had to have adapted and might have if I was with baby Hitler, grown into a person who believed the same things that all those Germans did. So if I wait too long, I'll start seeing things different. John Eaton, who likes to correct everything, he's one of those guys, says another subject with no research. Hitler was prepped for his position as a speaker. That's all. He was a good speaker, similar to Obama.

[Brett Vessel]

Yeah, go.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I'm talking about, Eaton. He's just a good speaker to get a support for a cause. Most of what the Socialist Workers Party did wasn't his doing. It goes deeper than just the head. He would have been replaced. In fact, he lost World War II because of his arrogance. They may have won, they came close to winning. But John, he was pretty strong in his beliefs. If you ever looked into Mein Kampf, the dude wrote that kind of on his own in a. In a jail cell, screaming and yelling that if I can get the right group of people together, I can lead them to these crazy ideas that the Socialist party had. Yes, he was a speaker, but he was also unhinged as a human being. These were his ideas as much as anybody. And because of his ability to lead, the things that those people were trying to get done got done. He was.

[Brady]

The other fascinations were just kind of different and weird.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he was not. You ought to look. Johnny makes carry on race. That's the, that's why 10 years ago and maybe now again the Hitler baby debate comes up is because it's like if you go back, all you do is kill a baby. No one knows what you've done. You're a baby killer. Or you go back and kill it, learn somebody else takes over. You find out it wasn't all him. But I happen to think that. That he was the leader for a reason. Reason. And the fact that his arrogance caused him to lose the war means that no one could usurp his power.

[Brady]

Would that change that movement?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's crazy. Yes. Drastically. That's my opinion. It's. But it's an unknown and I'm not sure. Yeah, I'm for sure it would because he was strong enough as like this dude brings up Obama. Obama got things done that other people tried to get done done that couldn't because he was an articulate, well spoken man who got his message across and was very persuasive. There were people trying to do what Hitler wanted to do. He got it done. So you cut the head of the snake off. Maybe they still.

[Brady]

Which I'm saying that, that you know, he was the one that stepped up. If you take him out of the equation not knowing there's other people that agreed with what.

[John Holmberg]

But none of them were as effective. Effective. I hate to say it this way. Charlie Kirk's group is not going to be as effective. Tons of people the exact same ideas but not going to be nearly as effective of what he was doing because they don't have that strong leader voice that can articulate that message as easily. I don't. I would assume that now that I. That I'm pretty sure we know. What I don't know is the, you know, the Hitler thing. It's unquantifiable. It's an assumption. But it's pretty, pretty good. It's a pretty good assumption. Wouldn't be amazing. Of all murders committed against political figures were future people stopping something and changing the course of history. And we would never know that. Maybe there is like a time machine killer out there who goes back and says, ah, boy, we got to put a stop to this guy. Pretty neat. Never ending though. As we learned in Back to the Future too. Eventually it just starts rotting itself into the idea that you can't have time travel because it starts becoming how many DeLoreans there. If, if Back to the Future 3 was accurate, there would have been like 25 DeLoreans by the time they made that fifth trip back. Because they're like, well, wait a minute. The DeLorean is in the future and the past now there's two DeLoreans now you're bringing more DeLoreans to the party Party. Now they're just everywhere. How are they still effective?

[Brady]

He would have made a lot of money.

[John Holmberg]

No, that third Back to the Future is a disaster. It's so incorrect all the time. All the way through. Actually, the first one is too.

[Brett Vessel]

When ZZ Top shows up for no reason.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God. They were just out of ideas. They just wanted to drive the car for a little bit longer. We got our Guadalupe replay sitting right in front of us. And it had, of course, sad Gene Simmons, who lost Ace Freely. That was. That was one one of them. Gay Pride. Brady was in the middle there. Who else was in there? Bill Cower. Sad Bill Cow. A lot of sad people. Yeah, I enjoy. I enjoyed the sad Gene Simmons. Yeah, I don't remember who else was in it. I'm gonna listen along with you guys. We're gonna find out who was in the Guadalupe replay.

[Brady]

Secret square.

[John Holmberg]

It's like the squares are brand new to all of us. Once again, it's 8:41. It's time for your squares. And here they are. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station. That's not particle board. That's the sound of real wood. The kind of wood that makes your neighbors jealous and your projects legendary. Call Oliver Star with 84 Lumber at 480-236-5578 or oliverstarlumber.com locally grown, seriously sturdy. Hey, everybody, It's John Holmberg here from the morning sickness. And you hear me all the time talking about my friends at Lost Our Home Pet rescue. We do the pick of the litter and it's brought to you by our friends [e-mail] Every week I head over to Lost Our Home Pet Rescue and I meet a brand new beautiful animal that needs a home. The work they do at Loster Home is unbelievable. Not just your average pet shelter, that is for sure. They help people in a lot of situations. Look them up online. Lost our home.org and check out everything we do at 98kupd.com in the pick of the litter section. You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you? It is time now for the most moral man in all of Phoenix to give you his opinion on your problems and then judge you off the air like we do every week. Oh, we have a field day with you people. It's what would Brady do? The word for nine o' clock once again is pay P A Y. Put it in the promo code and get it done. Qualify yourself for thousands of dollars, perhaps in your pocket. That's how works. What would Brady do? Is brought to you by our friends at Mo Money Pond. MMP Guns right there at the same Exact location they'll take care of in any direction you need them to take care of you. 12th street in Indian School. Mo. Money, pawn and MMP guns. One in the same. Taking care of the valley for. I'm going to make something up 300 years now. So great job. Happy anniversary, guys. Excellent work. Family business. And before the root, even families. All right, Brady, are you ready? Ready. I'm gonna save Francesca's till last. I'll start with it. I like the name Francesca because she wrote Francesca and then fake name in parentheses so she's not really named French.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, okay.

[John Holmberg]

She's guarding it just in case people at work here that she's trying to slot up. Here we go. Brady. There's a guy at my work that is awesome. Every girl at the office thinks he's great. I just started about a year ago and immediately I was drawn to to him. All the girls say that. That happens to them too. Recently he came to my desk and said, hey, can we discuss a work thing over lunch? His exact words were, let's have fun while we do it too. We can get a couple drinks and fix this thing. I think he's choosing me. I need this job. But if he makes a move, I'm giving in. What would Brady do? Sign Francesca. The fake name. Don't give in. What? Brady? Brett. What's he doing? I don't know. You blow this guy like you don't have a tomorrow and you never stop. He's awesome. You're killing the guy, Brady. What are you talking about? Don't give in.

[Brady]

This guy's the champ already.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

I mean, but you know, her job, she's like, you are putting that on the line.

[John Holmberg]

Are you? Yeah. And what way is it a boss?

[Brady]

Well, benefits right off the bat.

[John Holmberg]

Didn't say it was a boss boss. Just said he was awesome. They're working on a project together. Let's be honest, in a gaggle full of broads, the awesome dude wandering around, we automatically made him boss. Cuz sounds like boss. But she didn't say anything about boss. It's the dude at work she likes. It's Jim and Pam from the office.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And all the girls are like, he is awesome. We all think he's awesome. He wants to take you.

[Brady]

So none of that any of the other girls bit on the opportunity?

[John Holmberg]

Don't know.

[Brady]

Just tell you what you getting into. Okay. If you go for it, just know what potentially could happen.

[John Holmberg]

Joy. Happiness and joy. That's it. No, Brady, stop it. It's joy all the time. If you're just allowed to be Joy, you're the one we got to tell women that it's always a good idea.

[Brady]

What's the job?

[John Holmberg]

Doesn't matter.

[Brady]

I need to know.

[John Holmberg]

It's the blow. That's the job. We gotta start telling women all the time to stop worrying about it.

[Brady]

To go for it at work.

[John Holmberg]

Go for it everywhere, Brady, all the time. They're always second guessing themselves. What happens if I do this? Then this will happen. If so, what are the dominoes? Blow, man, blow. We have to stop wanting it from them all the time. And then warning them constantly, if you do this, there's trouble. Blow and don't think about it. Brady might have some points. I'm giving a counterpoint to Brady's moral view. But I'm trying to change the world. Brady's trying to just get this girl to be quiet. Blow that man.

[Brett Vessel]

There's one way to keep her quiet.

[John Holmberg]

Girl. It's a fact. Now you'll look at. Yeah, ask. Maybe that's a good idea Brady had that them. Ask a couple of the other girls if they've ever gone out with them. But she's already.

[Brady]

She's pretty to begin with.

[John Holmberg]

There you go.

[Brady]

There's no problems. You don't. I mean, there's guys lined up. I'm sure she's not.

[John Holmberg]

But she wants to pick her own guys lined up. That's a guy talking guys like I'm.

[Brady]

Pick her own.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but she wants to pick this one. Girls don't care about that kind of stuff. They like the challenge.

[Brady]

There was some proof behind the company Inc. Thing.

[John Holmberg]

Sure, sure. For men. Because men ascend to management positions. What is she? Secretary maybe?

[Brett Vessel]

Oh yeah. I mean, what else?

[John Holmberg]

She's a year into the gig. So think about it. A year ago you got this job. Sounds like you're pretty hireable. I mean, unhinged that job. And get to work. Francesca, she already said she's gonna do it. If he even gives us. You make the first move, Franchesca. You do it. If he makes a move, I'm in. Well then be in. Take a couple drinks. You know what the dangerous thing is? And here's where you can get them. Here's the good thing. You go out, you have a couple drinks and then you make some aggressive move and then go, oh my God, you were feeding me those drinks. Then accuse them of like dropping something in your drink. Balance the scales a little bit. Now you're getting paid if he turns you down. And now. And yeah, so I mean, women have all the power. She's not getting fired for the this. If he makes a move and she goes, what are you doing? Now there's trouble. If she makes a move, he's just going to be like, what guy has ever turned in a girl at work for making a move? Come on. Haven't heard of one. Doesn't happen, man.

[Brett Vessel]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

It's the safest thing you can do as a female at the office. Try to bone a guy there. Safest. You know, if he's available and you're available, he's not turning you in. In. Unless you're a pig.

[Brett Vessel]

Maybe down the hall.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's different. Is he gay? That's a good point. Yeah, but even then, they're just going to be flattered. I mean, if I went down the hall and I just grabbed one of them by the head, I'm like, I'm not even gay and I tried to kiss him, they'd be like, oh, my God, thank you. It's a. It's a guy thing. But you say, don't do it.

[Brady]

Just take a look at what you're getting in into.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. His bed sheets while you're going over those spreadsheets. Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

Bed sheets and spreadsheets don't mix.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, they do. Absolutely. They should make bed sheets look like spreadsheets.

[Brett Vessel]

Sounds like a Megan Thee Stallion song.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Bed sheets and spreadsheets. All right. Brady says, don't make out with this guy. He's too awesome, and your life will be worse. Or make out with them and find out.

[Brady]

Promotion.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You were meant to be forever. As a woman, you have nothing. If this was a guy, I'd agree with Brady completely. Don't do this. Nothing but trouble. Because if you make a move and she doesn't want it, it's sexual harassment. No guys ever. That's why that movie with Michael Douglas was so silly. When Demi Moore was trying to blow him and stuff, he's like, ah. And he did it. And then he sued her. All he'd have done is keep that quiet for as long as he could till Aunt Archer found out. Twink, that's a problem at home. That's not anything. No dude is turning you in at work. Unless you're a pig. Ever. Women have all the juice. Flip these roles, though, you're 100, right? Dude, don't dip your. Don't do it if you're talking to him, don't do it talking to her. Climb aboard. It's the safest place. Dear Brady, my husband Takes poops in the middle of the night and then comes right back to bed and it's ruined our love. Love life. He blames me for not wanting to do anything with him, but the truth is it's a cycle repulsive to think of that filthy ass laying in bed. And our sheets. I leave the bed a lot and I wash the sheets every day and tell them why it's causing problems with us. How do I get him to stop? Angie sleep in a different bed. Yeah. You say allow the man to constantly come back to bed covered in poo. He takes dumps in the middle of the night. He probably wipes in the dark and he rolls into bed and then wonders why she sees him as gross.

[Brady]

Yeah, I got no answers on that. Get over it.

[John Holmberg]

Get over it.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

If Ronnie took a dump every night and rolled back into bed, sure there wasn't.

[Brett Vessel]

Ronnie isn't right in this one and bother me.

[John Holmberg]

It would cleanse properly. Oh, yeah.

[Brett Vessel]

There you go, Brady. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

She better clean properly with it. So you would learn. You would clean your. Let me ask you this. This. You'll bang Ronnie after a poo.

[Brady]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

That's disgusting all day long. That is gross. You would. She won't. She's classy. She's not going to think I just had a dump, but I really want some. A woman would go clean herself real properly.

[Brett Vessel]

Rust button isn't turning around.

[John Holmberg]

A woman with r. No way. Ma goes. Comes climbing back into bed and you're like, I'm going in. Oh, and even if you were showers right over there. Even if you were a disgusting pig and went after it, she would stop you and go, you're not going in.

[Brady]

There right now diving in.

[John Holmberg]

She's not letting you. There's no woman, no decent woman will allow you down there if she's taken a dump and hasn't showered in between.

[Brady]

So what I want to know on this lady, how long they've been together. It sounds like for a while.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know.

[Brady]

It's always been this way, hasn't it? Or did he just now start doing this?

[John Holmberg]

It hasn't always been that way. There's no possible way when you first start living with someone, somebody that the first couple dumps drop has to take.

[Brady]

And has to go to the bathroom and then. And showers up and gets back in, you know? No, she's like, why? Why'd you stop showering?

[John Holmberg]

No, he didn't get up. He probably held it because you know those things.

[Brady]

Like if someone had. They didn't eat something Right.

[John Holmberg]

Good.

[Brady]

Upset stomach.

[John Holmberg]

Then you have to shower. If you're taking. Are you talking about food poisoning? Diarrhea. And you come back to bed, bed, clean up. Oh, that's disgusting.

[Brady]

But I wouldn't, I mean, a lot of times I would know it too. At 2am, if they're up, I don't know if they got up. I'm asleep.

[John Holmberg]

A dump. Yeah, but if, if, if sleep through it. If she did it every night and then did it every night, came back and you're like, hey, would you mind mopping up and not driving, dragging that dirt ass in here every day.

[Brady]

So the next thing I would ask her is, have you talked to him about this?

[John Holmberg]

She did say that. She said, I've talked to him.

[Brady]

You got to, you got to revisit it again.

[John Holmberg]

That's gross.

[Brady]

Just saying. Well, you change the sheets, this one's on the.

[John Holmberg]

Dude, if you're going to take dumps in the middle of the night, don't drag that back into bed with me.

[Brady]

Yeah, if it's a regular thing.

[John Holmberg]

The reason you're not getting blown is cuz I see you as filthy.

[Brady]

See if you can speed that up.

[Brett Vessel]

Everybody does it, but it's. I want to flaunt it. It's.

[John Holmberg]

I've ever taken a dump in the middle of the night, it's awoke. Like unless I was sick. I'm sick though. But if I'm sick, I'm not coming back into bed with you. If I can't control my ass, I'm staying somewhere else because it's gross. Probably close to the bathroom or laying in the bathroom or I'm going into the guest room or something. I'm gonna lay down in there and just be like, I gotta be on my own because this is repulsive compulsive poop bed.

[Brady]

You won't have to worry about that with a new toilet you're installing.

[John Holmberg]

No, I won't at all. But I'll still shower up because soap is important. Soap is very important. And dude, if you're, if your wife's not blowing you and you're complaining about it and she says to you it's because you come to bed filthy every night, why is it her fault?

[Brady]

Well, and if he's doing every night, it sounds like he's regular, then.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady]

Then try to speed it up. Like right before you go to bed, take, do your due, okay?

[John Holmberg]

And then take a shower.

[Brady]

Shower and then go to bed.

[John Holmberg]

But if your wife is telling you, here's what solved the problem that you complain about and you're like, then you're not getting blown and you have no one to blame but yourself. If Matthiah told Brett every night, hey, wash your ass before bed. Otherwise I see you as a pit pig. And that translates for women 24 hours a day. It's not just the bedtime thing. It's like, ugh. I think of him coming to bed with that dirty ass. Then her brain goes, is it. They think that way is they have dirty ass now. When's the last time he showered? I know he's taking, like, five dumps. I'm not going down there. They immediately talk themselves out of it. If she wasn't talking to him and not saying, hey, I'm not blowing you because I don't like you. That's different. Which leads us to this. Listen to this one. Dear Brady, my wife hasn't given me oral in 13 months because she said out loud. Now she hates it. The woman doesn't work, the kids are out of our house, and we can be free and fun again if you want to. But now she's taken away one of my favorite things in the world. I tried to tell her, and she said, why do you want me to do something I hate? Which is where she's got me. What do I do now? Garrett Cordell and Cordell, you've done no blow jobs.

[Brett Vessel]

Goodbye.

[Brady]

There's other things that you could figure out if she's not shutting it completely down. Yeah, I mean, there's other adventuresome things you can do you can figure out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but she's cutting off that one. She's not being that adventurous. When there's boundaries up, the adventure is over. You know, when you've taken things.

[Brady]

I guess if you can't, you know, if you can't get over the fact that she doesn't like to do that anymore and that's a deal breaker for you, then so be it.

[John Holmberg]

But if I have an idea. Quit paying for food.

[Brett Vessel]

What are you saying?

[John Holmberg]

She's a pig? No, she doesn't. Work. Take away something she loves eating. Say, oh, I don't like doing that anymore. What? Yeah, it's something I just don't like doing. Take away your credit card.

[Brady]

Why?

[John Holmberg]

Are you gonna make me do something I don't want to do? I'll pick up food on the way home for myself. You're on your own.

[Brett Vessel]

Take away your credit card.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Take something that she loves from her and just say, I don't like doing. What don't you like doing that you do and that you could go. You know what I could do without doing this. It doesn't help me anymore. And if we're taking away things we don't like doing, the other one's feelings don't matter. Take it away. Stop buying food. Sorry. I got my food allowance. It's just for me now. I'm not gonna buy you food anymore. Watch how fast I was gonna say.

[Brady]

The most important thing to do is research beforehand. That's something they don't like to go. You know that going into it.

[John Holmberg]

Sure. If she used to do it all the time, now she's grown tired of it.

[Brady]

Yeah, it's called marriage.

[John Holmberg]

Well, see, and that's Too many guys say that. Too many guys do that. Checking with the boss. Yeah.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Too many guys allow it to say, oh, okay. Well, here's what I don't like. Not having sex with girls at work. What?

[Brady]

A guy never says that?

[John Holmberg]

No, guys never said, I don't like it going down on you anymore. You're gross. Yeah. So you just, you know, take away something she loves, get rid of it. Why did you stop doing that? I don't know. Well, you know what guys hate most of all? Talking. Talking about your day. And the next time she comes, you're not gonna believe my day. Just give her the hand. What are you talking. Why are you doing that? I've decided I don't like this anymore. This is something I don't want to do anymore.

[Brady]

I used to love providing for you.

[John Holmberg]

I used to like that.

[Brady]

I just don't like it anymore.

[John Holmberg]

I just hate it now. Why are you doing this? I don't know. I thought we were doing takeaways of things we hate. I don't want to hear you talk anymore. Yuck. Your words just shrill. Why are you doing this? I don't know. Same reason you don't blow me. I just don't like it anymore.

[Brady]

I used to like listening to you.

[John Holmberg]

Because it led to something when you. Yeah, when you were blowing me, it was tolerable. Now that you're not. Yeah, because I knew at the end of listening to you it meant something. Now I gotta just listen n call a friend. You're horrible. Yeah, well, I'm all pent up. And whose fault is that? Go wash your ass. That is bad. If a woman.

[Brady]

What's interesting is that the fact that she's now not only said, you know, she's hardcore saying, I hate it now.

[John Holmberg]

Hate it.

[Brady]

Then what made that change?

[John Holmberg]

Time your enjoyment. Yeah, a guy liking it too much. Much chicks hate that.

[Brady]

Why Such, you know, if you're like, I'd like to take a break from.

[John Holmberg]

I can relate to her. I think I hate it, too, from her perspective. I don't think I'd want to do it.

[Dick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

But I'm not going to sit here and, you know, give Brett one every day for years and then gets used to it and then, like, threaten his job if he gets it somewhere else and then take it away from him. By the way, Brett, I'm not going to blow anymore. But even if you try to get it somewhere else, you're fired. You lose everything. It's like, now I have to stay.

[Brady]

That seems reasonable.

[John Holmberg]

This isn't a deal for anybody.

[Brett Vessel]

I mean, put it that way.

[John Holmberg]

Tell her you don't want to hear any more of her stories or just go home and go, hey, you know your friend. What's her name? Francesca. Yeah, I'm never going out with her and her husband and you again. Like, the play dates are over. Why don't we have fun with him? No, I've been faking it.

[Brady]

And I'm canceling your Hallmark app.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you got no more Hallmark app. You're paying for your own phone now. By the way, I don't have a job. Oh, you have one job you could do. Remember the job you used to do? Paid all your bills. Is that all I am to you? Yeah, well, not all, but, you know, that's a lot of it. That's a good portion.

[Brady]

It's an important part.

[John Holmberg]

It's one of the reasons I listened to. To you. Now I don't care. Oh, you know, Francesca, call a friend. Good luck to all these people. You got rust butt. He got all sorts of problems out there today. Blowjob issues here and there, lady trying to bone some guy at work. Brady putting a stop to that. I would totally agree if it's a guy. Guy says one thing Brady's right about is the other girls are going to get jealous if they find out and make your life. Life miserable. Cat, that could be trouble. Especially if another one's boned him already and that's been on the download.

[Brady]

It's weird that all of them have been holding off or they're just waiting. So he must be in a.

[John Holmberg]

He's awesome. This dude's awesome. I want to shake hands with this guy.

[Brady]

He's working at a pig farm.

[John Holmberg]

You think? I don't know. No, I don't think all the ladies liked him. I like to picture all hot ones, women sitting in a bunch of cubicles and this dude walks by. Hey, everybody. Oh, the swooning.

[Brady]

He's so hot. But Dustin won't go for any of us.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, why is Dustin not interested in anybody? Hi, ladies. Big weekend. I bet everything about him's big anyway. Well, there you go. You're all screwed up. Good luck. But I say to that lady hammer, that coworker, that's the big one today. Do what women should have been doing a long time ago. Dipping it in the company, inc. Get.

[Brady]

It out of the way.

[John Holmberg]

Do it. You can't get in trouble. You're a woman. Only men get in trouble for that.

[Brett Vessel]

There's more secretary jobs out there.

[John Holmberg]

Don't worry about it. Exactly. Perfect. All right, there you go. Word you're looking for for another couple minutes is pay. And that's on the app right now if you want to hop on that. In the meantime, think about what Brady just did, because he did it. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rocke radio station. All right, HMS Podcast. Time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the valley this week. Head downtown to stand up live to.

[Brett Vessel]

Catch fibs and friends featuring Connor Wood Thursday and Friday. Gerard Carmichael's there as well on Saturday.

[John Holmberg]

East side Tempe.

[Brett Vessel]

Ian Bagg Friday and Saturday with some.

[John Holmberg]

Comedy madness Sunday and then at Desert Ridge. Ian Baggs there on Thursday. And then the very funny and adorable Christina Mariani is there Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups.

[Brett Vessel]

And for dinner, tickets go to standuplive.com.

[John Holmberg]

Desertridgeimprov.Com and tempe improv.com hey, what's up? It's Mo and my friends at the university of advancing technology has been ranked the number one best college for computer science for not one, but two years in a row. Which makes total sense because UAT are always on the lookout for those who don't just embrace technology, they live it. From advancing computer science and robotics to cyber security, gaming and artificial intelligence, UAT is where innovation thrives, lives. So if you're ready to lead the next tech revolution, visit uat.edu mo. And don't just study tech. Live it. You thought that was funny? You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. What the hell is wrong with you? All right, we have to discuss it. I don't want to jinx it, but we have to. The emails have been bugging me all morning. Anyway, Richard's Seattle Mariners, who He just mushed. Mushed. Bought tickets. Richard did to the world series after they were up two. Here comes trip. We need you Here. I need you. And Trip is laughing already. He walks in laughing. Come on in. So, Trip, you are. Your Dodgers are in the World Series. Yes. All right. And his Mariners also had a 2.0lead in their series, but couldn't pull it off the way the Dodgers did. Right. Right. The Dodgers closed the deal. Deal tonight. And I'd like to broker this. If the Mariners lose, would you give Trip your tickets? No. Trip, you're welcome. Because you don't want these garbage tickets anyway.

[Byron (MMP Guns)]

Trip would rather.

[Brady]

Exactly.

[Dick Toledo]

Why? There's no way Trip is sitting in the outfield.

[John Holmberg]

He would fly. He told me already. There's no way I would fly to Toronto before I would.

[Brady]

Are there. Are there seats all the way out there?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there are. Those are actual concern about them people. That's not like a prison transfer or anything. Those are actual human beings that are there.

[Brett Vessel]

Those were. That's the way the world workers go.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that. Yeah. And then they. Yeah, well, I guess they are mostly.

[Dick Toledo]

Trip sits in seats where you can read the names and numbers of the players.

[John Holmberg]

Well, you can see the game. It's an important aspect of being at the gift. So you don't want his tickets?

[Brady]

Thank you.

[John Holmberg]

Even. Okay. Just checking in. Even free. They're that bad. Are you gonna. Do you want to make a friendly wager if the Mariners are in? No.

[Dick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

You don't want to make. You don't want to do it again.

[Dick Toledo]

He's gonna wax the Mariners.

[John Holmberg]

You think?

[Dick Toledo]

Have you seen the past four games of the Mariners?

[John Holmberg]

Did you hear what he just said, though? No contest. Yeah, exactly. He just jinxed the Dodgers. Oh, please.

[Dick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Now it's just going to be a bunch of people banging heads and nothing's going to happen everywhere. All right? I just want to pick. I want to make the offer to Trip that you had a couple of tickets just laying around you're probably not going to be able to use. And I know a guy who. Oh, do you regret my buddy Dave and the Series Dave? I mean, be more specific. Dave. Ross Roberts. Anyway. Yeah. Are you feeling the oops?

[Dick Toledo]

I'm not feeling the oops.

[John Holmberg]

How did you feel last night?

[Brady]

Like crap.

[Dick Toledo]

Like I didn't.

[John Holmberg]

Butterflies.

[Brady]

There's got to be butterflies.

[Dick Toledo]

Dan Wilson is just mismanaging the. The whole thing.

[John Holmberg]

I read Dan Wilson's lips last night. God damn it. Toledo is all I kept saying.

[Brady]

That's fair.

[John Holmberg]

You're tasteless. It's a good series. You didn't expect that after 2. 0. No. You're not having any fun with this. Sports sucks really, when you think about it, it's just flat out it was a great Friday.

[Dick Toledo]

But then it's also. To what end? Like, it's always heartbreak.

[Brady]

Always.

[John Holmberg]

I'm telling you right now, if the Mariners do go to the World Series and win it, quit being a fan.

[Dick Toledo]

I have to.

[John Holmberg]

It hurts too much after. Especially when you've waited as long. If they. If they were consistently there, it's different. Never like trips. Being a Dodger fan is like, man, we'll be there next year.

[Dick Toledo]

Exactly.

[John Holmberg]

Like it's a constant for them.

[Dick Toledo]

Exactly. If you've got a team, all those other teams have multiple World Series fu.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. If you got a team that's consistently competitive in there, it's what, 100 years? 108. It's brutal.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

I. I understand more now why you gave up. I don't know if you gave up on the Cubs, but why you stopped.

[John Holmberg]

I don't have it like I used to.

[Dick Toledo]

I understand it.

[John Holmberg]

The diseases.

[Dick Toledo]

I understand it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

If you get there, it's like there is so much effort and time and. Oh, your whole lotion put into every eight months a year.

[John Holmberg]

Your whole life has been the Mariners failing.

[Dick Toledo]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

Especially the last 25.

[John Holmberg]

It stinks. All right. Trip doesn't want your credit tickets.

[Brady]

Reflecting when the Cubs finally did it.

[John Holmberg]

Couldn'T wait for that. It was worth it. No.

[Brady]

Right?

[John Holmberg]

No, no, it was. It was a odd relief and almost anti. Climbing climactic. It was this. It felt great that your team wins it all, but it just took all this weight off of you. Like, I don't have to do this anymore. Like, it was almost a freeing. I felt like I had been released from prison. Yes, it was euphoric. But then I'm like, now I just don't. I don't want anything if that. I can't get involved in that again.

[Dick Toledo]

From Thursday night, I realized I'm like, God damn it. I have to wait until next October to even know if they're going to be close again.

[John Holmberg]

I have a feeling the Suns fans are going to be the same. Same that the. The.

[Dick Toledo]

Did you see their payroll?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, well, last year was the second highest in all of sports, but if you get it now, their payroll's not terrible this year. They still owe money for old guys, though. But if they win it all, it's going to be more of a relief than it is a celebration. It's. It's the weirdest thing, and I've talked to other Cub fans about it. It's like felt the same way. It's like it was over. It wasn't like it's finally, the nightmare is over. It wasn't. Oh, my God, we won. It. It was. That whole message has ended. It's just all of it.

[Brady]

It's different.

[Dick Toledo]

I was telling somebody else. It's different in football. It's just different.

[John Holmberg]

Yep.

[Dick Toledo]

A season seems to be. Feels like it's shorter than.

[John Holmberg]

Well, not for the. I mean. Well, you got your championships. Yeah. You got.

[Dick Toledo]

We've been there three times in 20 years. I know. Two losses.

[John Holmberg]

But then you get to be like Browns and Jets and there are teams.

[Dick Toledo]

Oh, yeah. Detroit. Detroit, Minnesota.

[John Holmberg]

It's going to hurt more Detroit fans when. When they get out of this open window and it. And there's no title and it closes.

[Brady]

Rebuild.

[John Holmberg]

Then you turn back into the Lions again.

[Dick Toledo]

How do you like just relating to Mariners? How do you do it in Cleveland? How do you do it as a Browns fan? They took your team away.

[John Holmberg]

Well, you're in Ohio, gave it back. You're in northern Ohio. Your life's miserable all the time. You're used to it.

[Dick Toledo]

When they gave it back. You've gone through, what, 29 starting quarterbacks.

[John Holmberg]

It doesn't matter. You're a Browns fan. Life. Life was not good in the first place. And then you strapped yourself up.

[Brady]

It creates a stronger bond.

[Dick Toledo]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

And they built it.

[John Holmberg]

Seems like, I don't know, you can huddle up.

[Brady]

Look at those fans.

[John Holmberg]

You can huddle up with a bunch of other losers and feel some sort of community. I guess. I don't know what they do. Anyway, it's time for the entertainment, Joe. Good luck with your ticket sales, Toledo, because you're not going anywhere. See, I'm trying to reverse it. Trying to help him back.

[Brady]

What a dick.

[John Holmberg]

I know. I'm trying to help back. He's the dick. You're right. If you were calling him the dick, you're right. He's the one who did this to him himself. By buying tickets to a World Series his team wasn't even in yet. Oh, boy, they do win.

[Dick Toledo]

The game is Saturday game. It's Sunday game two, I think.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Well, damn it, we're all counting on you. See? See you Monday morning right here in the morning sickness with Toledo present. And by then It'll be Toronto, L.A. 1 and 20 hundred 1 when you're back on Monday from your World Series game.

[Brett Vessel]

Boy, what a kick in the dick.

[John Holmberg]

Did it to himself. Did it to himself. Just don't buy World Series. It's time for the entertainment drill. Brady it is brought to you by our [e-mail] the home of tactical Black. I don't know if they can help you from kicking yourself in the dick, but they can if somebody else is trying. Yeah, just. Yeah, I guess that's the best defense is why are you doing it? Why are you doing that? Don't do that to yourself anymore. There's a lot of that. Why are you doing that? Is the big question at React Defense. What are you doing that for? That's a huge. What are you doing?

[Brady]

Stop it.

[John Holmberg]

They teach you how to stop saying that and start asking yourself, why am I doing this? I'm putting myself in harm's way. They teach you how to get out of situations before they even start. Sort of like the way Toledo bought tickets to a World Series with a team that's not even in it yet. You could have defended your bank account from that move. And also get you in great shape while you're at it. You're going to have some fun. You're going to meet great people who are like. And you guys are going to become better versions of yourselves. Reactdefense.com it's the home of Tactical Black Brady Quickly. Entertainment.

[Brady]

Jennifer Lopez did an interview on Howard Stern and talked about how she couldn't find a man to love her.

[John Holmberg]

She's had like eight.

[Brady]

They're not capable, she pointed out, but her ex. Oh, Johnny Noah, they were married from 1997-98.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

He said, no, you've been married four times. You're. We all loved you. We are capable. The problem was you didn't reciprocate.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

You didn't keep it in your pants. Oh. She's like, I wanna.

[John Holmberg]

I'm coming out on this.

[Brady]

Yeah. He basically did. He said, you. She was a unfaithful.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding. So she started to splash it around and tell everybody else. The whole time she's been talking their fault.

[Brady]

It's like, no, it's not. According to.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. Johnny Otani.

[Brady]

Oh, Johnny.

[John Holmberg]

Or whatever his name is.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, Johnny.

[Brady]

Jennifer Lawrence. She's recently done a movie with Robert Pattinson that's coming out. Die My Love comes out November 7th. So she's doing the interview and she was on the Graham Norton show show. And she talked about when Robert Pattinson came over when they were doing another movie before this. And he said, you got any food? She's like, yeah, I do. And he goes to the bathroom and she pulls the food out of the garbage because she's thrown everything away.

[John Holmberg]

He ate her Garbage.

[Brady]

Ate the garbage food. He's like, got any more? And she goes, yeah, I do, but it's. It's all in the garbage can.

[John Holmberg]

Oh.

[Brady]

He's like, I'm fine with that.

[John Holmberg]

He just ate right out of the trash.

[Brady]

Yeah. Why would you answer question half a second.

[John Holmberg]

Do you have any food with. Yes, if you've thrown it away. If you ask me right now, John, do you have any food? I'm like, no, because I just tossed it.

[Brady]

She folded under pressure.

[John Holmberg]

By the way, everybody wants to tell Toledo Happy domestic violence month tonight. Tonight might be. You might want to watch that one alone.

[Brady]

Lisa find something to do today?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah.

[Brett Vessel]

She'll be a postito.

[Dick Toledo]

She found out Friday. Had been able to keep it from her until Friday when she was listening to the show, getting ready.

[John Holmberg]

Me physically. Oh, you found her with the tickets.

[Dick Toledo]

Texting me. She goes, you bought tickets? And I said, maybe. And she goes, you're dumb.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you didn't tell her?

[Dick Toledo]

No.

[John Holmberg]

That'S dumb.

[Dick Toledo]

It's my account.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but still.

[Brady]

It'S my account or.

[John Holmberg]

Get away with that. Good job.

[Brett Vessel]

Job.

[Brady]

I would never do something like that.

[John Holmberg]

But then Brady bought an RV for somebody's birthday and it turned out to be his.

[Brady]

That's true.

[John Holmberg]

It's my account. Wow. All right.

[Dick Toledo]

But then Friday, when they won, she's like, who you going to take? And I'm like, I don't know yet. I'm not sure. They said Alex wants to go. And she goes, oh, does he?

[Brady]

Yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Dick Toledo]

And then she's like, well, I'm like, oh, you want to go now?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, she wants to tackle like I was, though.

[Dick Toledo]

She says, well, yeah, it's a once in a life. I'm like, you can't tell me I'm dumb.

[John Holmberg]

That's what you want? Are. Well, no, I'm telling you, you're done, too.

[Dick Toledo]

I agreed with her, but I'm like, wait a minute.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. She has every right to say you are dumb and go, yeah, but she's not going to enjoy it if they lose the game.

[Dick Toledo]

She better not.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, she's gonna be miserable. Anyway, good luck, Dodgers. By the way, Jersey. A couple months ago, I started to throw my support behind Jack Schitterelli out there in New Jersey. He's getting close. It's working. He's all. I know he's getting close. Got an email that says, are you still in the Shitarelli camp? And I'm like, I know Jack Scheduli. I'm in. He's going to win. Or maybe it's awfully tight. It was like 48 to 16 when I started talking about him. It's not my. It's not my way back when I found out I act like I had. I had nothing to do with it. And now it's like 48, 44. Wow. Yeah. Yeah. He's right on top. And if you're looking at the way that's going, she's stagnant and he's flying forward. Governor Citarelli is a very real possibility in our world. And before you email me, I don't even know what side he's on. I just like his name. Anybody named Jack Schitterelli gets stuff done, good, bad or otherwise. He's had a lot of obstacles just from the second grade on.

[Brett Vessel]

Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

Once the teacher said, Jack Seattle Seattarali Ciattarelli. Your name is Jack Schitterelli. Yeah. Okay.

[Dick Toledo]

Jack's not short for anything.

[John Holmberg]

Jack Saya Torali. Nope, you missed it again. My name. And get to know me. I'm Jack Schitterelli.

[Dick Toledo]

You'll know about me soon.

[John Holmberg]

You are going to know Jack Schitterelli. That's his name. Nothing I can do about it. Anyway. We're done. 1008 Larry's next. Fitz has your words for later in the day and we'll talk to you tomorrow right here in the morning sickness. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station.

[Brett Vessel]

All right, HMS Podcast. Time again to let you know where.

[John Holmberg]

To go for some great comedy in the valley this week. For the complete line and for tickets.

[Brett Vessel]

Go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com come.

[John Holmberg]

On down to the Ranch House Grill. Comfort food is your next meal. Pork chili verde, chicken fried steak, Ranch house nose. You'll think it's great. Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House Grill has been voted best.

[Brett Vessel]

Breakfast four years in a row.

[John Holmberg]

We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions. Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven days a week, 6am to 2pm We're a family restaurant with a small town atmosphere serving southwestern comfort food for 18 years. Come on down to the Ranch House Grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix at 56th street and Thomas Road.