Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona
Episode Summary: 11-07-25 – Playdio 2025 Is Now Full, Miss Universe Death Metal, and Bronco Engine Fakes
Date: November 7, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Episode Overview
This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness begins with the crew celebrating Playdio 2025 being officially full and discussing this year’s lineup of local bands. However, the conversation spills into humorously passionate territory about a Chilean Miss Universe contestant who sings death metal, then takes an unexpectedly deep dive into the male fixation on the “ideal ass.” The show rounds out with John’s story on buying a new Ford Bronco—complete with baffling, piped-in fake engine noise—and a ribbing of car culture’s embrace of artificial performance. As always, the crew’s banter mixes friendly mocking, local flavor, and the kind of comedy that’s both self-aware and unapologetically “guy talk.”
Key Discussion Points & Insights
Playdio 2025 – Local Music Scene & The Elusive Superstar
[01:11–03:35]
- Playdio, KUPD’s local band contest, is set with 31 bands for the 2025 competition.
- John revisits former Playdio winners, discussing their post-competition trajectories:
- Miles to Nowhere: Took their win and didn’t try for a repeat. “Typical broads. They took their win and they left. Didn’t even try for the back to back and shove it down the throat of all other local bands and musicians.” (John Holmberg, 02:39)
- Bear Ghost: Showed promise, but internal relationship drama caused a breakup.
- John and Bret joke about the uninspiring list of new band names.
The Chilean Death Metal Beauty Queen
[04:15–13:55]
- John stuns the room by playing audio of a death metal vocalist—then reveals she’s a Chilean Miss World contestant.
- “No, no, no, it’s not a dude. That is the most beautiful woman I’ve seen ever doing this… She’s a supermodel hot. Her name is Ignacio Fernandez.” (John Holmberg, 04:16)
- The group obsesses over beauty queen Ignacia Fernández, who fronts a prog-death metal band named Deceasus.
- Extensive, comedic debate on whether Ignacia is “the total package,” focusing on the photos where she covers her backside with her purse.
- “She might be a fastback… You think she might be a fastback? I don’t know. It doesn’t look great in that picture…” (John Holmberg & Bret Vesely, 07:22)
- The crew’s tongue-in-cheek analysis argues that women without “an ass” know it and never show that angle—“A girl with a nice ass always shows you that ass.” (John Holmberg, 10:17)
- Bret punctures the fantasy: “No ass is a dealbreaker. Might as well be a boy.” (09:00)
- John muses on the existential significance: “You should be able to get a handicap tag if you’ve got no ass. That’s like missing an arm. How come assless people don’t get special treatment?” (John Holmberg, 12:50)
- Reflection on how social standards and Instagram culture perpetuate showing off one’s “best assets.”
Death Metal, Gender, and Judging Female Performers
[13:26–18:04]
- The hosts remark on the incongruity of a beautiful woman with a guttural metal voice, and joke about “maybe she’s a man” if her butt isn’t up to standard.
- John shares anecdotes about women dressing to display their assets and the double standard where men are called “perverts” for looking, but women deliberately wear revealing outfits.
Buying the New Ford Bronco and the Fake Engine
[20:10–38:32]
- John shares he finally bought a new Ford Bronco, creating comedic tension in his “interracial 70s relationship” garage (he now parks a Jeep and a Bronco together).
- “It’s a DEI garage right now… Jeeps in the Bronco, they’re getting along, but there’s definitely a little tension…” (John Holmberg, 21:17)
- The discovery: The Bronco comes with piped-in, artificially loud engine noise through the subwoofer to simulate a power engine—but only inside the car.
- “When you hit the gas, it’s making so much noise. Outside: totally quiet. Inside: deafeningly dumb.” (John Holmberg, 22:30)
- “Why would you want your engine to blow you out of your interior?” (John Holmberg, 23:18)
- John finds this “douchebag feature” absurd, comparing it to wearing “a penis extender and actually believing you have a huge one,” or “a woman faking an orgasm” for herself. (Kyle, read by John, 39:35)
- Humorous musing:
- “If you bought a house and it had no back door, it wouldn’t be up to code. You have to have an ingress and egress in the back too.” (John Holmberg, 16:16)
- “Just have it do the daily affirmations. You’re good enough, you’re smart enough, and people like you. I got the coolest car in the world and no one knows it but me. Isn’t that like having an invisible friend?” (John Holmberg, 32:11)
- John learns the feature can be turned off with a program called “Forscan” (Kyle, 39:35).
Additional Notable Segments
- The crew quickly detours into why some female comedians and Instagram stars exaggerate their posing to show off their butts.
- Light riffing on car engines, muscle cars, why V8s are dying out (thanks, Greta Thunberg and emissions regulations), and men’s persistent desire for status-signaling engine growls.
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Playdio ambition:
- “Typical broads. They took their win and they left. Didn’t even try for the back to back and shove it down the throat of all other local bands and musicians.” — John Holmberg (02:39)
-
On Miss Chile death metal singer:
- “She is a supermodel hot… If she came in second, I wanna see what won.” — John Holmberg (04:16–05:18)
- “If that glorious girl says I want to sing in your death metal band, you’re like: yup, you’re in. You’re gonna make us famous. For just a minute, anyway.” — John Holmberg (07:21)
- “You ruined her. Even girls with nice asses can’t stop turning around in pictures...” — John Holmberg (10:17)
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On artificial car features:
- “It’s play pretend time inside the car… We’re not doing anything special, we’re going 14 miles per hour, and it’s going to sound like we’re in an F19.” — John Holmberg (26:48)
- “If your brain is so easily fooled that you need that noise in your car to think you bought a big engine, you’re an insane person.” — John Holmberg (25:49)
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On male/female double standards:
- “Any girl that takes a straight-on picture knows something’s wrong back there.” — John Holmberg (17:45)
- “Your boobs are out and you’re wearing a Baymax dress. You look like a singular human being with… That is your skin. And we’re not allowed… But you’re the one trying to get your areola to peek out the top.” — John Holmberg (19:04)
Timestamps for Key Segments
- Playdio 2025 lineup and reflections: [01:11–04:00]
- Miss Chile death metal segment: [04:15–13:55]
- The “No Ass” debate and Instagram culture: [08:16–12:50]
- Car Buying Story – Ford Bronco and engine noise: [20:10–38:32]
- On the psychology of fake engine sounds: [23:58–32:32]
- Turning off the fake engine, tech details: [39:32–40:15]
The Original Tone
As always, the gang delivers their takes with an irreverent, sometimes self-deprecating humor. Their commentary is part affectionate ribbing, part genuine observation on cultural trends, and always hyper-aware of their own “guy-ness.” From the highly specific conversation about “what makes a woman hot” to their puzzlement at the absurdities of modern car manufacturing, Holmberg and company keep the banter rolling, rarely missing a beat (or a punchline).
For New Listeners
This episode is a great showcase of HMS’s blend of local Arizona flavor, sharp observational humor, and intentionally unfiltered male perspectives—packing real-life anecdotes, pop culture riffs, and outlandish metaphors, all with a self-aware wink.
If you want to hear:
- What a morning show thinks about music competitions actually “making” a band,
- Why a Miss Chile semi-finalist who sings death metal set off a debate on Instagram beauty strategies and “ass science,”
- And how fake car engine noises break the masculine psyche,
…this is the episode to tune into!
