Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – November 10, 2025

Episode Theme:
Celebrating Marine Corps Birthday & National Cupcake Day, hilarious Thanksgiving traditions, house guest etiquette, a bizarre wellness trend, and the gang’s signature banter on odd news and internet culture.

Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness blends irreverent humor with topical discussions, centering on National Vanilla Cupcake Day and the U.S. Marines’ birthday. The show features hosts John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo, and guest voices, riffing on everything from the dumbest Thanksgiving help line questions, awkward house guests, a new “dark showering” trend, and a slew of weird news stories. Listeners are treated to a fast-paced collection of conversational bits, memorable rants, and comic exchanges rooted in Arizona flavor and national culture.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Marine Corps Birthday & National Cupcake Day

[03:03–04:02]

• The show kicks off by honoring the Marines:
  • “Happy birthday, Marines.” (Brady Bogen, 03:05)
  • “Hoorah.” (John Holmberg, 03:07)
• National Vanilla Cupcake Day is playfully mashed up with Marine culture:
  • “Why do you not have frosted on your lips, Marine? Don’t you know it’s our birthday? Put a candle in that vanilla cupcake.” (Holmberg, 03:12)
  • “This is my rifle. This is my cupcake.” (Brady, 03:53)

2. Bizarre Thanksgiving Hotline Questions & Turkey Disasters

[05:50–08:07]

• Recalling Butterball’s dumbest hotline questions from ten years ago, including:
  • “How to cook a turkey so it has bikini tan lines.” (Brady, 06:07)
    • The crew agree: not a dumb question, “that’s hilarious.”
    • Solution: “You make a tinfoil bikini.” (E, 06:21)
• Deep dive into cooking turkey in the ground (“dirt turkey”) and its dangers:
  • “You’re raw dirt. … Eventually, a dirt turkey is gonna come out red.” (Holmberg, 06:41–07:03)
  • “Why am I right about food and you two still dig your heels in?” (Holmberg, 07:13)

Memorable Quote

• “Imagine poor Sean Rockefeller, our blind listener, doing dirt turkeys with the teenagers in Brady’s neighborhood. He couldn’t have cut into that … he just had to hope and trust he’d be dead.” (Holmberg, 07:46)

3. Ten Years Ago: Weird News & Poll Results

[08:10–10:15]

• Perfume as bug repellent — “Bombshell kept mosquitoes away better than some commercial bug spray.” (Brady, 09:21)
• Ellen DeGeneres was voted kindest celebrity; Taylor Swift, Will Smith behind her.
• Jason Aldean’s blackface costume controversy was survivable (“The news about that is you can survive it. So go get them, kids.” (Holmberg, 10:09))
• Women preferred stubble over clean-shaven faces (poll for No-Shave November).

4. House Guest Limits & Etiquette

[11:25–13:53]

• Survey reveals: Most people are happy hosting others for up to six days. Three days is the ideal, beyond which “you’re staying too long.”
  • “If you’re not packed up on day three, you’re staying too long.” (Holmberg, 11:44)
• Hilarious tales of Ralphie May (comedian friend) raiding Holmberg’s kitchen at night:
  • “I had a sick dog I had to sleep on the couch with and I just see that lumbering giant, his underpants walk through my kitchen.” (Holmberg, 13:10)
  • “I got no snacks in this house ... Like a bunch of people from Auschwitz live here.” (Ralphie, 13:20)

Noteworthy Moment

• “We don’t have, like, middle of the night beef jerky. I don’t know what you’re looking for.” (Holmberg, 13:25)

5. Wellness Trend: Dark Showering

[15:07–17:14]

• Discussion of the new trend: Showering in the dark to relax and improve sleep.
  • “Showering in the dark is supposed to make you calm and improve your sleep.” (Brady, 15:17)
  • Sarcastic takes on “doctor types” endorsing this:
    • “I’m a doctor type. I’ll be your doctor type for the day.” (Holmberg, 16:05)
    • “So Jordan says … Dr. Jordan.” (Brady, 16:16)
• Real sleep benefit is from dimming the lights to reduce cortisol and increase melatonin, but total darkness is discouraged for safety.

6. Weird News Oddities

• Man finds gold bars while digging a pool in France—gets to keep them:
  • “It’s yours.” (Brady, 19:53)
  • Legal/language tangent: what counts as “treasure.”
• LASIK patient hallucinates big breasts after eye surgery:
  • “All I could see was large breasts for several days.” (Brady, 22:11)
  • “If Dr. Jay Schwartz said you can pay an extra thousand to see gigantic breasts… that’s a side effect? Okay. On everyone? … Even the guys?” (Holmberg, 22:55)

7. Radio Videos & Viral Clips (Graphic Descriptions)

[23:17–25:40]

• Lumpy headed man seeing a “doctor type”
  • Visual jokes: “He looks like one of those alien creatures in the Fifth Element.” (E, 23:39)
  • “His head looks like a piece of chewed gum ... like when the desert doesn’t get enough water.” (Holmberg, 24:29)
• Beachgas explosion clip:
  • “Now he’s full … Oh, you gotta roll in the sand … Get your head involved, he’s dying anyway.” (Holmberg/Brady, 25:10–25:16)
  • “What is this, an Oppenheimer party?” (Holmberg, 25:29)

8. Internet Fame & OnlyFans Profits

• Woman makes $43 million on OnlyFans, but remains religious:
  • “God’s very forgiving. Like, you better lean on that one because what stuff you’re doing on there …” (Holmberg, 26:20)
• “Her body’s hot enough that … I don’t care if it was Toledo’s head on that body. I would do everything I could to get hard ... It was incredible.” (Holmberg, 26:32)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

“This is my rifle. This is my cupcake.”

— Brady Bogen, 03:53

“All it takes is one [bad dirt turkey] for another hour. All it takes is one. Imagine poor Sean Rockefeller, our blind listener, doing dirt turkeys … he just had to hope and trust he’d be dead.”

— John Holmberg, 07:44

“If you’re not packed up on day three, you’re staying too long.”

— John Holmberg, 11:44

“Showering in the dark is supposed to make you calm and improve your sleep.”

— Brady, 15:17

“I’m a doctor type. I’ll be your doctor type for the day.”

— John Holmberg, 16:05

“If Dr. Jay Schwartz said you can pay an extra thousand to see gigantic breasts for a few days … On everyone? … Even the guys? I'm like, this is the best thing ever.”

— John Holmberg, 22:55

Detailed Timestamps for Key Segments

• [03:03] – Marines’ Birthday and Cupcake Day mashup
• [06:03] – Butterball’s dumbest hotline question: “bikini tan lines” on turkey
• [07:46] – Dirt turkey cooking dangers and Sean Rockefeller gag
• [09:21] – Perfume as bug repellent and poll memories
• [11:25] – How long is too long for house guests?
• [13:20] – Ralphie May’s midnight kitchen raids (“Auschwitz people”)
• [15:17] – Dark showering wellness trend
• [16:05] – “Doctor type” parody begins
• [19:21] – Frenchman finds $800,000 in gold bars
• [22:11] – LASIK patient hallucinates big breasts
• [23:27] – Lumpy head “doctor type” video segment
• [25:07] – Beach gas explosion viral video
• [26:20] – $43M OnlyFans Catholic model

Recap & Tone

The episode is classic HMS: wild, irreverent, and fast-paced, with Arizona-centric humor, pop culture riffs, and running in-jokes galore. Holmberg’s sardonic style, Brady’s easygoing commentary, and the group’s chemistry make for a dense, joke-packed show that pokes fun at everything from wellness fads to family etiquette, all wrapped in their signature, unfiltered delivery.

Listeners get:

• Witty anecdotes
• Absurd real-life news
• Razor-sharp banter on traditions, pop culture, and weird science

You’ll walk away laughing—and probably thinking twice before hosting guests for more than three days, trying dark showering, or trusting a teenager with your Thanksgiving turkey.