11-12-25 - BR - WED - List Of Whitest States In The Country - List Of Hobbies Where People Are Most Pretentious

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 11-12-25 - BR - WED – List Of Whitest States In The Country / List Of Hobbies Where People Are Most Pretentious
Date: November 12, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo, Trip
Theme: Fun with U.S. demographics, pretentious hobbies, quirky news, banter, and wild internet finds

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Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness blends sharp-witted banter and observational humor as the crew dives into U.S. demographic oddities—most notably, which are the "whitest" states in the country—and pokes fun at the hobbies they believe attract the most pretentious folks. With signature irreverence, the team delivers bizarre news stories, listener interactions, and plenty of riffs on everything from Maine’s population makeup to competitive pickleballers.

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Key Discussion Points and Insights

1. App Promotion & Listener Engagement

• [01:14–04:01] John encourages listeners across the nation (especially in North Carolina, thanks to a big listener at the Cummins plant) to download the 98KUPD app, jokingly plotting to “confuse the Bobs” (station execs) with unexpected spikes in out-of-state listenership.
• The “Bobs” are a running joke: office execs who allegedly don't really know what’s going on.
• Memorable Quote:
  • “Bob's shut up. You don't know what you're doing or you'd be doing this.” (John, 04:01)

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2. Fun Facts & Day Recognition

• [05:35–06:09] Brady delivers quick hits:
  • Living near the ocean may add a year to your life—“Not true if it’s a lake, pond, or other inland body.”
  • “National Happy Hour Day” and “Chicken Soup for the Soul Day.”

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3. The Whitest States in America

• [06:22–09:39] The team dissects a list of states ranked by their white population percentage:
  • Top three:
    • Maine is #1 (90.2% white)
    • Rhode Island is #2
    • Vermont and West Virginia tied at 89.1%
  • Hawaii is the least white (21.6%).
• They ponder why anyone of color would willingly move to Maine and joke about the state’s lack of diversity.
• Memorable Quotes:
  • “Even the clan’s like, this is no fun.” (John, 07:01)
  • “If I was black, I wouldn’t live there. What’s the point? Gotta be something weird.” (John, 08:23)

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4. Pretentious Hobbies List

• [09:49–13:00] Brady reads an online list, team adds commentary:
  • Most pretentious hobbies according to the group/listeners:
    • Engineer cycling, meditation, disc golf (“Calm down, bro, you’re throwing a Frisbee in the woods.”), audiophile obsession, yoga/Pilates, pickleball, wine tasting, CrossFit, luxury watch collecting, being wealthy, charcuterie boards (“It’s an adult Lunchable. Get over yourself.”)
  • John’s take: “Anytime you add the word 'aficionado' at the end of what you like, you’re a jerk.” (13:37)
• Group’s gripe: Pickleball communities are cliquish, “super late 60-year-olds getting really competitive.”
• Memorable Reaction:
  • “Readers, you’ve lost your way...stop pushing it.” (John, 11:43)

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5. Crime and Curiosities

• [15:02–16:12]
  • The crew discusses a porch pirate in Mississippi/Alabama (Todd Bond) who dressed as a woman to steal packages, only to be caught thanks to home security cameras.
  • John dubs the culprit “Silence of the Lambs.”
• [16:12–17:43]
  • Guinness world record: A Hungarian man, “Grasshopper,” played Dance Dance Revolution for 144 hours, beating the previous record by six hours.

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6. Absurd Innovations

• [18:43–19:23]
  • Brock’s Candy releases a $5 “cane opener” for unwrapping candy canes—a sign of peak laziness.
  • Hosts marvel at how unnecessary this invention is:
    • “You’ve got diabetes so bad, you can’t get that little piece of cellophane off a candy?” (John, 19:08)

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7. Viral and Bizarre Videos

• [19:44–26:12]
  • Light Rail Incident:
    • Footage of an engineer falling asleep on the San Francisco light rail, resulting in a wild curve at high-speed.
    • “Relax! Relax! Relax! We didn’t crash.” (John, acting out the engineer, 21:07)
    • The hosts riff on the ethnicity of train passengers and laugh at the chaos.
  • Indian Farmer Video:
    • Brady presents a viral clip of a severely deformed Indian man farming while laying on the ground. The group reacts with equal parts shock, discomfort, and dark humor.
    • “That’s where nightmares are born.” (John, 26:12)
    • Extended riff on whether the man is truly a farmer or just attempting to go “Indian viral.”

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Making fun of Maine’s lack of diversity:
  • “If you’re a black guy and you want some chubby white girls...might I suggest Kenny Bunkport?” (John, 12:01)
• Wine and charcuterie pretension:
  • Brady: “Boss, it’s an adult lunchable. Get over yourself and pass the Swiss.” (13:40)
• On competitive pickleball:
  • “Nothing funnier than a group of late 60-year-olds getting really competitive.” (Trip, 10:54)
• On the Indian viral video:
  • “It's like leaving one of those Halloween skeletons in the sun and it starts to melt a little.” (John, 24:26)
• Listener engagement bit:
  • “We’re gonna make them work finally on something that might matter and they’re going to overreact and it’s going to be hilarious.” (John, 03:50)

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Timestamps for Key Segments

| Time | Topic/Segment | |----------|-------------------------------------------------------------| | 01:14 | App download campaign, confusing “the Bobs” | | 05:35 | Brady’s news, fun facts, “Happy Hour Day” | | 06:22 | Whitest states in the USA | | 09:49 | List of pretentious hobbies and animated group reactions | | 15:02 | Porch pirate dressed as a woman, caught on camera | | 16:12 | Guinness record: Dance Dance Revolution marathon | | 18:43 | Candy cane opener innovation | | 19:44 | Bizarre light rail crash video discussion | | 22:20 | Indian “farmer” viral video and escalating gross-out humor |

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Language and Tone

• The entire episode is packed with irreverent, fast-paced sarcasm and regional humor.
• The banter is playful, sometimes edgy, leaning on cultural references and in-jokes (like “the Bobs”).
• Audience: Fans who enjoy off-kilter, unscripted comedy with social commentary.

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Final Remarks

Listeners looking for a mix of odd facts, biting takes on everyday pretension, and plenty of off-the-rails laughter will enjoy this episode. Highlights include their breakdown of U.S. demographics, the roast of hobby snobbery, and their no-holds-barred takes on internet oddities and offbeat news items. If you're curious about which state to move to for peak "whiteness," why pickleball is a breeding ground for snobbery, or what happens when train engineers nap on the job, this is a must-hear.

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End of summary.

Transcript

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[John]

You've been deceived by an agent of Satan himself.

[Ad Voice]

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[John]

Sitting right here.

[Brett Vesely]

Come on.

[Byron]

No, no, he's not.

[John]

He's not evil. He's just a bit rude. It took two people to perform that song. Two bands. Five Finger Death Punch, along with Baby Metal off of the 20 years of five finger death punch album that is floating around out there. That's a good one. I don't mind that at all. It's 8:06. The 8:00 clock word for ticket in the app is bonus. B O N U S bonus. That's the 8 o' clock word. You got about 35 minutes to pop that into that promo code box on our app, maybe win a thousand bucks. That's as good as it gets. Keep getting that money thrown at you and satisfying the Bobs. We had Cameron from Orlando email earlier, and I tried to encourage him to get everyone he knows in Orlando to download the app, whether they like us. Or not. Just to confuse our radio exec Bob's. And this guy says, all right, John, I'm with Cameron. I've been listening since I lived in Phoenix back in 0405 and I listen every day here in North Carolina at my shop. There's a couple of us skilled, well paid individuals. We have a couple hundred working for the Cummins plant and they all have business phones. All of those phones are getting the 98kUpd app today. Carolina's numbers going through the moon. Thank you very much, Taylor. Oh, and then he signs it Eat that, Bob's.

[Trip]

Thanks, Taylor, because you're actually one of the reasons Carolinas we do really well in.

[John]

Yeah, evidently.

[Trip]

No, it could be too Cameroon and Carolinas.

[John]

This guy emailed and it was a great email. He said, my goal now is to get everyone I know in the military and everywhere else to download that app because the dream would be that the Bob send Larry to Djibouti for his next excellent adventure.

[Trip]

Your Valley Toyota dealers.

[John]

Well, because every time you see those countries, there's a couple Toyotas filled with people running around loaded. They love Toyotas. It's a good car. So if we can confuse the Bobs, they're like, geez, maybe we should send Larry off to Cameroon. Seem to have a quite a following down there. Sorry, Larry got to go to Africa with Max and take some pictures for the weekend and then give money. Pretty great. Anyway, do it. Get everyone involved. Confuse. You all have Bob's. Whether you know them or not, every business has a gaggle of Bob's. They're clueless almost all the time. Everyone I know as I get older has the imposter complex. They're just doing it. And some of them are great at it and some of them aren't. But they're all worried that someone's going to walk in the room and go, that guy's no good at his job. Everyone worries about it. The Bob's are the worst ones. So basically we're going to make them work finally on something that might matter and they're going to overreact and it's going to be hilarious.

[Brady]

And the thing about the excellent adventure is Larry still has 72 hours to accomplish.

[John]

Yeah, he's got to get to Africa and back. Not only that, get all the footage for the. And he's. Yeah. And he's got to Airbnb it somehow. There's nobody's paying for anything. Not our station at least. Toyota might help him out. Great stuff. The word is bonus. Download that app wherever you are get your family involved. Just like our friend in North Carolina is getting all of Cummins Diesel. He's gonna download it on their phones. It's just out of the blue your app promotion got so big. Oh the Bob's will lose it and I'll giggle knowing we'll all giggle knowing they won't. They'll just think we did something special or that their idea was good and that keeps them quiet for at least a year. And that's the goal. Bob's shut up. You don't know what you're doing or you'd be doing this. It's 809. It's time for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. While you type in the word bonus in the promo code on our app, it is brought to you by our friends at All Pro shade. AllProChade.com A great thing right now with all this amazing weather is to get that shade up there. 85 degrees. November, you get some shade, you're sitting outside, you're in paradise. You've added a room to your house without doing a whole lot of construction and all Pro Shade can come out there and do that. And as the sun sets and you're enjoying your time out there under that shaded patio, you know what? It's going to cool off. All Pro Shades got you there too. If you get any motorized shades right now, they'll throw in a heater. How about that? So the shades in the daytime keep you warm at night. That's what they do. Allproche.com Brady Report it good Wednesday morning to you.

[Brady]

Phoenix. Hello world.

[John]

Hi.

[Brady]

Happy national Happy hour day and Chicken Soup for the Soul day.

[John]

All right.

[Brady]

A couple of basic fun facts. Research from the Ohio State University found that living within 30 miles of an ocean or a gulf may be linked to a longer life by at least one year. The same isn't true among people who live near an island an inland bodies.

[John]

Or like a lake or pond.

[Brady]

Near a lake or pond.

[John]

Ocean only.

[Brady]

Fresh water.

[Trip]

Yeah, fresh water. No good.

[John]

No good. Brackish. You get six more months.

[Brady]

The whitest state in the us. Whitest? Yep.

[John]

Utah. Oh, too many Indians. Vermont.

[Trip]

Vermont.

[John]

Yeah.

[Trip]

Your main Rhode Island.

[Brady]

Rhode island is second.

[Trip]

Maine.

[Brady]

Maine is number one. 90.2%.

[Trip]

90 cabin masters.

[John]

So there's 9.8% is not white. Yep, 9.8%.

[Brady]

Vermont in West Virginia are tied at 89.1%. And then Hawaii is the least white state. 21.6%.

[John]

Susan's retiring. She's moving up to Bangor can't wait to get there. 90% white. That's a lot of white. Even the clan's like, this is no fun.

[Trip]

We get a little diversity.

[John]

Let me talk about unithought.

[Trip]

We got nobody to march against.

[Brady]

Can't find.

[John]

There he is. Go get him. Then we'll be all 100%. That's true. Let him live.

[Brady]

When Facebook first launched in 2004, you could only upload one photo. There was no messaging, no notifications, no wall, and no status updates.

[Trip]

The good old days.

[John]

What is the arrest of Maine? Like, why would you live there if you were black? No, I'm not talking about cities. Like, what's the. What's the other 9%? Mexicans or some black Native American proximity.

[Trip]

Canada. I would say Asian.

[John]

Asians. Angels are blowing through all. They're not doing all of Canada. Yeah, but they got to walk all the way across Canada to get to Maine.

[Trip]

I'm just saying, you know, it'd be easy to filter down.

[John]

Ah, it's not even down, really. Nova Scotia.

[Brady]

They'd be going the other way. Their access mostly is from the Pacific.

[John]

Yeah, they're not. They're not crossing all of Canada loaded in British Columbia.

[Trip]

But I'm just saying.

[John]

Listen to what you're saying.

[Trip]

They're visa laws.

[John]

They're not going all the way to Maine. They're stopping somewhere in the middle of Canada. Why all of it's Maine? Nobody's no Chinese goal is Maine. They're not coming in from the Canada side. If the Maine's their goal. To fly over Europe. Interesting. I wonder what the other 9% is, because I know if I was black, I wouldn't live there. What's the point? Gotta be like something weird.

[Trip]

Even Gemini. Maine's ethnic makeup is overwhelmingly white.

[John]

It is 9 out of 10 largest.

[Trip]

Minority groups being multiracial people, followed by black or African American, Hispanic, Asian and American Indian. Alaska native populations.

[John]

So even the natives, like Eskimos. That's called Eskimos. That's an Eskimo. They don't count that. That's. As a Canadian, like Native.

[Trip]

I suppose two or more races make up 3.9% of the population.

[John]

Wow.

[Trip]

Black or African American. 1.9.

[John]

You're forced to live there if you're black or you're going to the. You got a scholarship to play basketball at Main U. Yeah, but they're getting.

[Trip]

The hell out of it.

[John]

Yeah. After a couple years, I think six months, you got to fill it out like you are.

[Trip]

Yeah, you're right. Asians, only 1.2%.

[John]

There's not a lot of Asians crossing all of Canada to get to Maine, you'd stop. That's good. Toronto, Nice. Then they're done. Wow.

[Brady]

There's a online list of hobbies that seem to attract deeply pretentious people. Engineer cycling was on there.

[John]

Oh, yeah. You get into that.

[Brady]

Okay. Meditation.

[John]

How's engineer?

[Brady]

It says, you wouldn't believe how narcissistic people get when they first start the spiritual practice of meditation.

[John]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Disc golf.

[John]

That's a lot of man buns.

[Brady]

It says, calm down, bro. You're throwing a Frisbee in the woods.

[John]

Yeah.

[Brady]

Can't be that serious. Audio files.

[John]

Some of those that can get annoying.

[Brady]

Two types. The ones that are curious for different and multiple sound signatures.

[Trip]

The yogi yoga, Pilates people.

[John]

Oh, yeah. The ones that get too far into.

[Brady]

That, that's probably the meditation side of it. Yeah. Someone put pickleball.

[John]

Oh, yeah. If you're serious about pickleball, you start talking about how it's your exercise.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Trip]

Nothing funnier than a group of 60 late 60 year olds getting really competitive.

[John]

It's great for them because their movement.

[Trip]

Does great for them. I'm just saying socially.

[John]

Yeah.

[Trip]

There's some fighting going on.

[John]

Oh, they get. They're competitive. But again, when I hear somebody getting serious about pickleball or they start talking about like the exercise, it's like you're not doing much. Then like, this is the only thing you do all day.

[Brady]

And if you're at the different levels that surprise like there, it definitely is like clicky.

[John]

They're only super late.

[Brady]

They're not gonna let someone new in until they see skills. What they got.

[John]

Right.

[Trip]

Definition of pretentious has a picture of local artist. It does this texter.

[John]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, that's. Then they drew it themselves.

[Brady]

Yes. Wine tasting is another one.

[John]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

CrossFit, cross dressing, reading.

[John]

Yeah. Readers have got. You've lost your way, readers. I know you like it, but stop pushing it.

[Brady]

Luxury watch collecting boy.

[John]

Tripp fits into like nine of these.

[Trip]

Yeah, he does.

[John]

Being wealthy evidently is pretentious.

[Trip]

What I heard from the Brady Report just now is go to Maine for the white bitches.

[John]

Yeah, there's a lot of white. If you're a black guy and you want some chubby white girls who don't like, they can't exercise for four months of the year because of the snow, it might be heaven. If you're a black guy that can't get laid in Scottsdale, may I suggest Kenny Bunkport? There'll Be some thick albino white women up there.

[Brady]

Another one along the lines.

[John]

I can hear them packing their bags right now.

[Trip]

Yeah, they're padded up. A lot of flannel.

[John]

You know those hellcats just start up. They're heading to Maine.

[Brady]

Another one along the lines of the wine tasting is charcuterie board aficionados.

[John]

Anytime you add the word aficionado at the end of what you like, you're a jerk.

[Brady]

It says boss. It's an adult lunchable. Get over yourself and pass the Swiss.

[John]

It is that man. Some of it's great, though I'm not an aficionado because I always go, what's that cheese? And then somebody will say a word. I don't know. It's a gularia. Like, I don't know what that is. What's on it?

[Brady]

Is it camel?

[John]

Does it have coconut?

[Brady]

What?

[John]

Like, okay, I'll eat it all the.

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[John]

This is a dry cheese. This is a crumbly cheese. I don't care what's it. I don't even care what it's called.

[Brady]

And when you like it or it tastes like. That's unbelievable. I was really good.

[Trip]

So.

[Brady]

And then you go to the store and decide to try what?

[John]

What, you don't know what it is? Yeah, I can never remember Trip then.

[Trip]

An aficionado or does he just go and off of their Recommendation. Give me a board trip.

[John]

Does both of that. He knows some cheese and then he.

[Brady]

Finds the ones he likes.

[John]

He finds one we like. Yeah, we knock that thing stiff. He's got a couple in there that I swear to God, it's just. It's heaven. But I don't think he just shows up and cuts it open. It's Whole Foods. It can't be that aficionado based.

[Brady]

We've got a 46 year old man in Mississippi named Todd Bond who was arrested after multiple porch thefts in Mississippi and Alabama, including one house where they stumbled upon a massive treasure. The house had at least a dozen packages stacked up on the porch and Todd made repeated trips to the porch from the porch to his car. Got every single one of them. It was caught on the home owner's camera and they didn't know at first because the suspect was a woman. But Todd was dressed as a woman.

[John]

Oh, psycho.

[Brady]

Long bleached hair, headband, makeup, and he was in a skirt. He was arrested in charge of first degree theft of property. Here's the photo when they arrest him.

[John]

Oh man, that is. That is a grizzly gum. That is Silence of the Lambs.

[Brady]

We got another record breaker, John. Wow, a Guinness record. I think this is this guy's only one. He's from Hungary. Not even begin to pronounce his name.

[John]

Try it.

[Brady]

Says Bullet Cespe.

[Trip]

Nailed it.

[John]

That's not so bad. I'm not going to question you.

[Brady]

He is known as Grasshopper because he played dance dance Revelation, Revolution for an unbelievable 144 hours in a row to secure the record. The deal was you dance for an hour, you get a 10 minute break. So he did it basically from on.

[John]

Beginner level, I hope.

[Brady]

October 23rd, he started, finished October 29th.

[John]

That's you gotta get a job.

[Brady]

Danced to over 3,000 songs, burned over 22,000 calories and he did it in the town of Kashmir, Hungary. And I'm saying that.

[John]

Well, you're saying it like an idiot too. That's the previous yelling at us.

[Brady]

Record was held by Carrie Schwereki from the US. She did it for 138 hours.

[John]

Oh, she missed by six hours. She got to go back out there.

[Brady]

And she was on Just Dance.

[John]

Do you try, try again?

[Brady]

No, she's.

[John]

Yeah, man, oh man.

[Trip]

So which one's better, Just Dance or Dance Dance Revolution?

[Brady]

I don't know.

[Trip]

They still making those?

[John]

I don't know either. I just know if you go to those video game places, a few of those platforms, somebody there's an Asian kid on it all the time, and they're really good at it.

[Trip]

Oh, go to Tokyo. Oh, my God.

[John]

There's. Of course I'm gonna see Asians on the games there.

[Brady]

Go to Maine.

[John]

What in the hell is he talking about? Go to Tokyo. I just said there's an Asian kid revolution. Yes. Said Asians are good at it here. Imagine that. He's like, you want to see Asians? Tokyo? Of course. Go to Tokyo if you want to see an Asian dance on Dance. That's all you're going to see. By the way, Rico Blazed was just hired as chief of police in. Was it Augusta, Maine. It's a pretty impressive. He's up there. He's going to do some damage. New sheriff. Yes. A new sheriff. That's a lot. Yeah, that's right. There is a new. The new sheriff is near.

[Brady]

Brock's Candy just released a limited edition candy cane opener. It's going on sale next Monday. Just go to the cane opener dot com.

[John]

What does that mean?

[Brady]

Basically, you put it in a little square rectangle. It looks like a cigarette lighter almost. And the candy cane is in that plastic sleeve. It just opens up, sheds it for you.

[John]

You've got diabetes so bad. You can't get that little piece of cellophane off a candy.

[Brady]

It'll run you five bucks.

[John]

That is pathetic.

[Brady]

There's a. A picture of it.

[John]

If people are struggling to get the candy canes out, you just hold it and push it out the bottom.

[Brady]

I never struggled.

[John]

No, you'll eat the plastic. I've seen it.

[Brady]

Sometimes you use that as you slide.

[John]

It down so it doesn't get sticky. Hmm. And you're also opening it wrong. That's crazy. That is some serious huge, lazy.

[Brady]

I've got two radio videos. First one, you're gonna have to pull up. Rich. It's a video that's been released from an incident that happened in September when a light rail train flew into a curve at high speed. Oh, because the guy. Or the. The. The pilot or what you call it?

[John]

The engineer. The train driver.

[Brady]

Yeah. Let's just say the light rail.

[John]

Isn't that what he is?

[Brady]

Is In San Francisco, she dozed off briefly at the control center.

[John]

The train pilot?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John]

You don't like calling her the engine engineer. Yeah, that's what it was.

[Trip]

Not qualified.

[John]

You just don't give her credit because it's a light rail. She's not running a real train, so. And it's a woman, so why would we give her all sorts of. She said she is out, man. Well, I mean, how much attention do you have to pay?

[Brady]

It's going 50 miles per hour.

[John]

She's cooking.

[Brady]

Watch when they hit the curve.

[John]

Oh, it's gonna. It's gonna. Oh, the people inside just get leaned.

[Brady]

Then she grabs again.

[John]

Essentially, the steering wheel. Oh, we're going hot. We're coming into the next turn hot. There's a car and no leave. Screaming through stop signs.

[Brady]

Watch this. Stands up.

[John]

Does she say it? I'm sorry. Relax, relax, relax. We didn't crash.

[Byron]

Relax.

[John]

Yeah, relax. She's right. It's San Francisco. They don't understand what she's saying. You have to say re racks. Re racks. The whole place was Asian. Poor people. You really want to see a train with Asians on it? You should try Tokyo Brady. They got them all over the place. I was blown away. Yeah, she's coming in hot. She went out cold.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John]

Sleepy train. Look at her.

[Trip]

She laid on the horn.

[John]

She knew she hit the horn. Oh, she hit the brakes.

[Brady]

The old man dropped.

[John]

They have the double footage of the passengers. The old man was smart. Take a knee.

[Brady]

He did.

[John]

He hits it. Get a low base on this. Was he going to the symphony? There's a dude in a tuxedo on.

[Brady]

The train, and I thought, the lady, I thought, oh, is that a nun on the ground? Nose or headphones? White.

[John]

Relax. It wouldn't stop. It wouldn't stop. Ah, you are asleep. That's good stuff. All right.

[Brady]

The next one is one of the best Indian farmers.

[John]

Oh, no, I got.

[Trip]

Yeah, it's one of Brady's. It's a Brady.

[John]

Oh, no, it's gonna be Indians making food, isn't it?

[Brady]

Clearing the fields in a record time.

[John]

Another moment from your. Oh, the algorithm of Brady's disgusting Indian food guys.

[Brady]

Well, he's just a farmer.

[John]

Yeah, that's where the food starts.

[Trip]

You don't know if he's.

[John]

Oh, he's been cut. Oh, no, he's laying down. What is wrong with him? Oh, my God. Oh, he's the worst thing I've ever seen. Kill weighs about eight pounds. He's got remarkable abs. He has literally is just skeleton and.

[Trip]

Skin bigger schwants than the golden.

[John]

Oh, sure, sure. He's still living. Look at the size of that pecker. But nose sweatpants. Indian sweatpants. And he's. He's unrooting some Indian sugar cane. It's just. I don't know. It's feces based. I'm sure.

[Trip]

I don't know.

[John]

Look at the size of him. He's eight or nine pounds and he's all twisted up and he's laying on the ground doing farming. They couldn't find anyone else better for this job. Look at him, he's doing bundles. He's got loads of them.

[Trip]

Comments and people with good hands looking for a handout. What's wrong with you?

[John]

Yeah, there's people who are looking at their snap benefits. Meanwhile, this guy's a slim, like, he's like a Slim Jim with a stick. And he's pulling out farming stuff.

[Trip]

But so his, his lower half seems to work. He cannot, he can't stand. Right.

[John]

His pelvis becomes this pretzel and Brady has access to all of his wrists shirtless. And he's laying in this hay shirtless.

[Brady]

Some of those things look kind of sharp. Like after you cut them. Sure.

[John]

What does he care? Brady's.

[Trip]

His wrists are at a 30 degree angle.

[John]

What is he. And his head is completely normal sized and moderately good looking. Yeah.

[Brady]

How long that hand is? It's like.

[John]

Oh my God.

[Trip]

Oh, both hands face the wrong way.

[John]

Yeah, both hands are crooked out the wrong way. It's like leaving one of those Halloween skeletons in the sun and it starts to melt a little. Oh, he's a disaster. What do you do with your spare time, you freak? Brady. Yeesh. Bonus is the eight o' clock word. Bonus. That's the one you want to hit for the eight o' clock bonus. How? Well, if he tried to shoot himself and he missed because his hands are pointing so badly, can't even get it aimed at him. I would leap off of anything. I'd elbow crawl to the tallest mountain and just roll down it.

[Trip]

It'd take you your lifetime.

[John]

I would. You know what? I'm not strong enough to fight the pillow. I just get under one. Oh, they should. This is where at birth those Indian doctors should have just gone. It didn't make it, but I can hear it crying. No, no, no, that's the nurses. Your baby's gone.

[Brady]

But it kind of proves what you say. A lot of people say, oh, you know kid, he's no way he's gonna make it. And the dude's like 42 now.

[John]

I don't know.

[Brady]

Hoe and fields.

[Trip]

What does that have to define for me? What? Make it.

[John]

Yeah, what is it? I've been saying. Yeah, I've been saying it shouldn't make it. I didn't say it's not gonna. Unfortunately, some of them keep going. Nothing could coming out of that.

[Brady]

You want to be a farmer, you can do it.

[John]

No, you can't. He's not a good farmer.

[Trip]

Be all you can be.

[John]

If he was a good farmer, he'd have his arms and legs in the right places. He's a joke farmer. People film him doing it. He's probably not even a farmer. That was probably just an attempt to go Indian viral.

[Brady]

Yeah, they put him in there, just.

[John]

Cut down a couple of and dude just lays around all day. Not eaten, that's for sure. Yuck. Thanks for that, Brady. That's where nightmares are born.

[Trip]

Greatest content creator.

[John]

What if we laid that thing down over there? Would you be the guy with the birth defects? That is rude, is it not? Oh, it's rude. But I guarantee it makes it to America. All right, let's go get him a hole. Did you know what they mean? Would you like to haul a field? I would do anything for a couple of bucks. Oh, this is interesting. He can become an Internet whore. Anyway, it's 8:30. That is gross. Bonus is the word you want to put in that code section for the 8 o' clock hour. It's perfect. There goes your Brady report. It's 98. It's not weird. It's pretty cool actually. No membership fees. I have heard enough of this.

[Shopify Rep]

Shopify's point of sale system helps you sell at every stage of your business. Need a fast and secure way to take payments in person? We've got you covered. How about card readers? You can rely on anywhere you sell.

[Byron]

Thanks.

[Shopify Rep]

Have a good one. Yep, that too. Want one place to manage all your online and in person sales? That's kind of our thing wherever you sell. Businesses that grow grow with Shopify. Sign up for your $1 a month trial at Shopify. Com. Listen. Shopify. Com. Listen.