Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness (98KUPD)
Episode: 11-12-25 – John Learns What Jelking Is And Tries It – Entertainment Drill – Scott Hamilton’s 70s/80s Super Group for Cancer Fundraiser
Date: November 12, 2025
Episode Overview
In this lively installment of Arizona’s irreverent ‘Holmberg’s Morning Sickness,’ John Holmberg, along with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo, take listeners through a raucous blend of banter, pop culture news, and offbeat personal stories. The key themes today run from bizarre men’s health fads (hello, ‘jelking’) to the juxtaposition of wild pasts and new religious fervor, celebrity feuds, and the unveiling of a classic rock super group for charity. All the while, the show maintains its tongue-in-cheek, provocative style.
Key Discussion Points & Insights
1. “Jelking”: John’s Hilarious Introduction and Painful Experiment (01:19–05:18)
- What is Jelking?
John shares his morning internet rabbit hole: jelking—a purported method to increase penis size by manually stretching and tearing tissue. He cheekily describes the act as “kind of treat[ing] your penis like...one of those things that puts frosting on a cake. Squeeze from the bottom, work your way to the top, the cone.” (02:12) - Online Algorithms:
John jokes that one click led to his news feeds now being filled with jelking content:
“You can’t give me jelking again, but I’ll let you know how it’s going. Cause right now it just hurts.” (03:18, John) - Comparisons with Penis Pumps:
John recaps past mishaps with a penis pump for a “joke” that—temporarily—worked:
“The thing was massive. When I popped that glass tube off...it was as big as the tube. It was crazy...the recovery wasn’t any fun at all, but it worked for the day.” (04:28, John) - No Plans for Sharing Pics:
He jests,
“I’m not going to post pictures or anything, but if it starts flopping around a little harder, my pants start feeling funny, I’ll let you know.” (03:45, John)
2. Entertainment Drill: From Papal Movie Tastes to Celebrity Life Swaps and Feuds (07:49–15:19)
Pope Leo’s Favorite Movies (07:49–08:27)
- A running gag—what films would ‘Pope Leo’ enjoy? John bets on Chicago-centric classics, but the real list is wholesome (e.g., “It’s a Wonderful Life”).
“I would imagine Planes, Trains and Automobiles, Uncle Buck, Brewster’s Millions...” (07:55, John)
Jenna Jameson’s Pivot to Christianity (08:57–10:54)
- The hosts marvel at the adult film star’s spiritual trajectory:
- Converted to Judaism in 2015, now proclaims Christianity.
- John’s take:
“Now she’s a pious jerk who tells you that everything she made her name on was bad and you shouldn’t do anything fun.” (09:11, John) - Satirical reflection on people who regret their wild pasts:
“Don’t do anything I did. I’m like, what you did? Sounds awesome...oh, we were doing coke off of Bubbles the monkey...Now it’s so much better with Jesus. You don’t seem as happy.” (10:03, John)
Euphoria Stars' Political Rift (10:57–11:42)
- Reporting on a rumored falling out between Zendaya and Sydney Sweeney due to political differences:
“Sydney’s a righty, isn’t she?...Zendaya’s the other way...she was outed as a registered Republican.” (11:11, John and Brady)
- John opines on the immaturity of dropping friendships over differing views:
“If you can’t be grown up enough to talk to somebody like that, you’re a jerk.” (11:42, John)
- John opines on the immaturity of dropping friendships over differing views:
3. Scott Hamilton’s Cancer Fundraiser: The 70s/80s ‘Super Group’ (12:10–13:56)
- Event Overview:
Figure skating legend Scott Hamilton is assembling members from Journey, REO Speedwagon, Loverboy, Kansas, and Chicago on Nov 23 for a cancer fundraiser. - Skepticism & Rock Antics:
John is wary:
“They’re not showing up. Members of those members...I fell for this once before...a member of each band and none of them had ever played together before. They got through half of Suffragette City when they realized we don’t know any songs.” (12:39–13:13, John) - Performer Details:
Mike Reno of Loverboy to appear with his wife; John Elephante formerly of Kansas will do a solo set.
4. Celebrity Recovery and the ‘Holier Than Thou’ Syndrome (13:59–14:49)
- Liam Gallagher credits his reunion tour for saving his life, citing newfound sobriety.
- John’s recurring issue with reformed hard-livers scolding others:
“I’m not saying it’s good. I just don’t like these people that turn their lives around and then tell everybody else how wrong they are for taking that path. I know it’s not a good path. Everybody who does it knows.” (14:21, John)
- John’s recurring issue with reformed hard-livers scolding others:
5. Honoring Joe Walsh: Blunt, Classic Sickness Observations (14:49–15:48)
- Wichita renaming a street for the Eagles’ Joe Walsh.
- John’s playful suggestion:
“Just calling Joe Walsh Way Rocky Mountain Way. They wouldn’t do that in Wichita.” (14:49, John) - Good-natured riffing on Joe’s appearance:
“He looks like if Bill Maher was trying to become Joe Walsh...his tongue doesn’t work.” (15:04, John)
Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments
-
On Jelking:
“You basically kind of treat your penis like one of those things that puts frosting on a cake.”
—John Holmberg (02:12) -
Algorithm Self-Deprecation:
“You can’t give me jelking again, but I’ll let you know how it’s going. Cause right now it just hurts.”
—John Holmberg (03:18) -
On Religious Conversions:
“Whoever’s dicking her, she believes in his way.”
—John Holmberg, re: Jenna Jameson (09:31) -
Celebrity Sobriety Shaming:
“I just don’t like these people that turn their lives around and then tell everybody else how wrong they are for taking that path.”
—John Holmberg (14:21) -
On Celebrity Super Groups:
“They got through half of Suffragette City when they realized we don’t know any songs.”
—John Holmberg (13:12)
Timestamps for Important Segments
- Jelking Riffing & Experiments: 01:19–05:18
- Entertainment Drill (Kickoff): 07:49
- Jenna Jameson’s Conversion: 08:57–10:54
- Zendaya/Sweeney Feud: 10:57–11:42
- Scott Hamilton’s Super Group: 12:10–13:56
- Liam Gallagher’s Sobriety: 13:59–14:49
- Joe Walsh Honored: 14:49–15:48
Tone & Style
The tone is unapologetically loose, irreverent, and quick-witted, as hosts mock themselves, celebrities, and “polite society” in equal measure. Listeners are treated not only to pop culture news but also to the unique lens of the ‘Morning Sickness’ perspective—brassy, unfiltered, and always entertaining.
