Holmberg’s Morning Sickness on 98KUPD

Episode Summary: Thursday, November 13, 2025 (“FULL SHOW”)

Main Theme & Purpose

Arizona's favorite irreverent morning radio show crew, hosted by John Holmberg with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo, takes on everything from American wealth obsession, the death of the penny, viral outbreaks at concerts, politics and immigration, to sex, relationships, dog puke, and wild stories from in-studio comedians. As always, the tone is sharp, unfiltered, and distinctly skeptical, skewering sacred cows with a blend of humor and genuine group therapy.

Key Discussion Points & Segments

I. The Billion Dollar Lottery, Trillionaires, and the End of the Penny

Timestamps: 02:01–25:18

• Billion Dollar Lottery Patterns
  The crew notices that huge lottery jackpots always hit close to the holidays. John suspects it's a marketing ploy:

  “Is it Powerball or Mega Millions or whatever—whichever one is hitting a billion again? Every time! Is this thing rigged?” —John Holmberg (02:57)

• Lottery Apps and Skepticism
  App-based ticket sales like Jackpocket spark discussion of digital vs. physical tickets. John’s experienced moderate luck on scratchers, but big jackpots still seem dreamlike and unattainable.

• Daydreaming About Extreme Wealth & Elon Musk's Trillionaire Buzz
  When imagining hypothetical windfalls, the show pivots to a stat about Musk: If he becomes a trillionaire, he could supposedly buy every car in America and all Ivy League schools (04:59).

  “Trillion is like...it’s an unimaginable amount of money...I’m not good with anything past, I dunno, a couple hundred bucks. I’m still mourning the loss of the penny!” —John (05:14)

• The Death of the Penny & Useless Change
  What will happen now that the penny is being discontinued? Conversation veers to the cost of manufacturing coins, superstitions about picking up pennies for luck, reluctance to dig for change, charity bowls at cash registers, and the overall pointlessness of small denominations.

  “Pennies are dead. 232 years. Stop charging anything less than 0 and 5..." —John (07:28)

• Trillion Dollar Math Rabbit Hole
  Listeners and co-hosts debate whether Musk could purchase all registered vehicles in the U.S., with failed attempts at long division and snark about their own math ineptitude.

• Antipathy & Envy Toward Billionaires
  John reflects on society’s hatred for the ultra-rich, and the comedy among those who’d villainize billionaires—yet would never give the money back if it landed in their own laps.

II. Wealth, Resentment, and How Rich People Spend

Timestamps: 25:53–34:00

• The Timelessness of Wealth Gaps
  Wry look at history: “The rich getting richer, the poor getting poorer” is as old as governments themselves, Judaism included.

• Philanthropy, Taxes, & Legitimacy
  How billionaires protect their money, give to charity for write-offs, and the tax strategies of the ultra-wealthy.

• Lottery, Marriage, and Using Assets (Literally & Figuratively)
  John offers an unapologetic mini–TED-talk about ‘marrying up’ as the “female lottery,” defending women who pursue rich husbands.

  “If women used their vaginas as currency, you talk about lotteries...that is a lottery in itself.” —John (21:18)

III. Sex, Sextortion and the Arizona News Roundup

Timestamps: 40:47–48:43

• UA Man Sextortion Scandal
  Story about a 76-year-old Upper Arlington man, involved in a sextortion case: he met a younger woman online, sent sexual photos, became blackmailed, then killed his wife and attempted suicide—before trying to frame the mistress.

• Generational Dick Pics
  Lighthearted but honest talk about whether their own parents might have participated in the original “beaver hunt” or sent nude Polaroids in their heyday; group laughs over the evolving etiquette of nudes over decades.

IV. Culture, Health, and Morality: Measles, Pop Stars, and Immigration

Timestamps: 49:13–78:59

• Tate McRae Concert Measles Outbreak
  An outbreak of measles traced to a Tate McRae concert gets the show’s wry treatment:

  “If you saw Tate McRae last week, you’ve got measles. I always look at her and think, you’re going to catch something if you’re around her too long.” —John (49:13)

• Pop Star 'Cleanliness' & Sexual Energy Rankings
  Humorous, and somewhat raunchy, evaluations of current pop singers (Tate McRae, Sabrina Carpenter, Britney, Katy Perry, etc.) by how “safe” or “dangerous” they seem in the bedroom.

• COVID Memories & Reservations
  The pandemic’s legacy, and how Native reservations went into deeper lockdown than their non-Tribal neighbors to prevent COVID spread.

• Donald Trump’s Immigration Proposal: No Fat People Allowed
  The team debates a (real) Trump plan to ban overweight or chronically ill immigrants so as not to “drain the healthcare system.” Mixed reactions, with plenty of dark humor.

  “Who leaves a country where you got fat? That country was treating you right!” —John (64:16)

• John’s Immigration Reform: Only Good-Looking, Fit People Allowed
  Satirical idea: “If we want new Americans, we want them to be hot... Only good-looking, thin people rolling into the States!” —John (69:28)

V. Social Commentary: Parenting, Single Mothers, and Church Charity

Timestamps: 80:53–90:41

• Controversy: Should Churches Give Money to Single Moms?
  Hot take segment about a local pastor refusing church charity to single mothers, calling it “encouraging fornication and whores.”

  “He’s living the life. So he’s not. He’s less hypocritical... Fornicators and whores are part of the Bible.” —John (86:41)

• Scriptural Debates and Real-World Consequences
  Spirited exchanges about the role of forgiveness, the “rules of the book,” and how much double standard is baked into church life.

VI. In-Studio: Comedians David Jolly & Spunky Robinson

Timestamps: 119:24–138:08

• Background & Nicknames
  David Jolly and Spunky tell wild childhood stories (including a regrettable “tummy rubbing” tale) and riff on comedy’s weirdest open-mic moments.

• On Fame, Comedy, and Being “Nice”
  David talks about the transformative effect of “Kill Tony” and the importance of not being a jerk:

  “Just be nice to everybody, man. We all humans, all on this big rock together.” —David Jolly (138:12)

VII. Sports Banter With Dale Hellestrae

Timestamps: 142:17–175:05

• NFL Midseason Review
  Predictions, praise, and dejection: NFL trade deadline, quarterback performance woes, and the fate of the Cardinals and Steelers.

• On Baby Showers & Gender Reveals (and Mocking Them)
  Dale reveals he attended his granddaughter’s gender reveal, sparking John’s fierce skepticism about baby fever traditions:

  “No one wants an invitation to your baby reveal. Not a human being alive says that’s... Thank you very much. And let me say thank you to all the others who weren’t invited.” —John (172:05)

Notable Quotes & Moments

• On Wealth and Trillionaires:

  “Once it hits a billion, we all get interested, which is really weird. That’s a strange, strange thing we all do.” —John (04:53)

• On Pennies:

  “Face down penny stays down. Face up penny is the good luck one. If you’re an idiot who believes that pennies being tossed in the ground are good.” —John (06:48)

• On Human Nature & Billionaires:

  “Instead of being mad at someone else’s wild success, get angry at yourself for not having any.” —John (16:40)

• On Marriage & Wealth:

  “If I was a woman, you'd have no idea how rich my husband would be. I would be the wacky, funny, ugly, but I would do all of it because that is a lottery in itself.” —John (21:18)

• On Single Motherhood & the Church:

  “The dude is the dude sounds like old school Bible guy. I’m not gonna [support] fornicators and whores. That’s old school Bible. They used to stone him.” —John (84:30)

• On Donald Trump’s Immigration Plan:

  “Who leaves a country where you got fat? That country was treating you right.” —John (64:16)

• On Pop Star Sexual “Cleanliness”:

  “Tate McRae’s a rubber... Sabrina Carpenter’s got a great, pretty face. Tate McRae is a little rough, but the body’s insane and she knows it.” —John (56:00)

• On Being Nice:

  “Just be nice. That's the most simple and basic answer. ...We all humans and we all on this big rock together.” —David Jolly (138:08)

Timestamps for Major Segments

| Segment Theme | Timestamps |
| --------------------------------------------- | --------------- |
| Lottery/Billionaires/Penny Talk | 02:01–25:18 |
| Wealth, Resentment, and Sexy Marriage | 25:53–34:00 |
| Sextortion/Generational Dick Pics | 40:47–48:43 |
| Measles/Tate McRae/Immigration Banter | 49:13–78:59 |
| Single Moms & the Church | 80:53–90:41 |
| Comedians David Jolly & Spunky Robinson | 119:24–138:08 |
| Sports Banter & Baby Showers w/Dale | 142:17–175:05 |

Language, Tone, and Format

• Language: Uninhibited, frequently profane, and full of dry, sarcastic asides mixed with honest moments of reflection.
• Tone: Brash, self-deprecating, and iconoclastic. The hosts take little at face value, prefer group skepticism, and aren’t afraid to mock themselves.
• Attribution: Quotes & shifts in topic are directly marked—see above timestamps/quotes.

Final Thoughts for Uninitiated Listeners

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness covers the spectrum from headline news and economics to relationships, morality, and pop culture, all filtered through the sardonic—but often insightful—lens of Arizona’s most unfiltered morning crew. The episode has something for everyone: observational comedy about the absurdity of money and fame, sharp social commentary, bits of shock-jock raunch, and guest comic hijinks. Underneath the humor, the real theme is the madness of modern priorities—whether it’s fixating on lotteries, pop star sex appeal, or our obsession with ritualizing life events like baby showers. The show’s message can be summed up in David Jolly’s words: just be nice. But, as always, they’ll make you laugh before you get there.