Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona
Episode: 11-19-25 – Family Discovers $800k In Gold Bars In Backyard, Raccoons May Be Evolving To Become Pets, Illinois Man Waves Gun To Impress Women
Date: November 19, 2025
Overview
This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness features the show’s signature blend of Arizona local flavor, irreverent humor, and oddball news stories. John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Brett Vesely, and Lisa cover topics from an unbelievable treasure discovery to questionable attempts at romance, bizarre animal evolution, and Thanksgiving table talk. The episode mixes news, fun facts, video commentary, and rapid-fire banter, exemplifying the morning show’s looser, edgy comedic tone.
Key Discussion Points
1. Grilled Cheese Weather and Celebratory Days
- Opening banter centers on the perfect weather for grilled cheese ("look outside and tell me a grilled cheese waiting for you wouldn't be awesome right now" – John, 02:03).
- Shoutout to Beckett’s Table for the ‘best grilled cheese’ (03:00).
- Fun Observance: "Happy National Have a Bad Day Day" and "World Toilet Day" get mock celebrations.
Notable Quote
"I'd take two days of wretched tummy aches and poops just to taste grilled cheese."
— John Holmberg (03:00)
2. The Super Japanese Toilet Saga
- Ongoing tale of John’s dream to install a deluxe Japanese toilet—complete with lights, music, and bidet features.
- He needs an electrician to handle the installation due to the power requirements. The guys riff on the experience of using such toilets.
Notable Quote
"It's got the Internet... I got this thing on order."
— John Holmberg (05:11)
3. Fun Facts: Jackass, Presidential Beards, and Death Stats
- Jackass Fun Fact: The original cast included Stephanie Hodge, who left after being seriously injured (06:17).
- Presidential Beards: Only five U.S. presidents had beards, all Republicans (06:41).
- Death Odds: You're 104 times more likely to choke to death than be struck by lightning (07:30).
4. $800,000 in Gold Bars Discovered in France
- Follow-up on a man in France who found gold bars and coins in his backyard, worth over $800,000 (08:04).
- Police traced the gold to 20 years ago; if no heirs are found, it goes to the state.
- The crew debates what they’d do in that situation—consensus: don’t tell authorities, “go third-world” and keep or quietly launder the gold.
Notable Quote
"You find gold, you go third world on that. You do not report it."
— John Holmberg (08:39)
"If you find gold, [the government] gets it. Why? Because you can't prove it's yours."
— John Holmberg (09:46)
- They joke about melting the gold bars, sign-spinning gold buyers, and general government “greed.”
5. Raccoons Evolving into Pets?
- University of Arkansas research: raccoons are becoming physically cuter and less disease-ridden with urban adaptation (13:29).
- Riffing on how proximity to humans speeds up “domestication syndrome” in animals like foxes and mice, not just raccoons.
- Strong feelings about the risks and reality of raccoon behavior: “They’re mean” and “will mess you up” (15:19–15:32).
Notable Quote
"They're adorable homeless people... but raccoons aren't friendly when they don't want to be."
— John Holmberg (14:43)
6. Ridiculous Story: Illinois Man Waves Gun to Impress Women
- 27-year-old Saba Bonilla arrested in Rockford, IL after waving a semi-auto rifle out of an SUV window to try to pick up girls (15:46).
- The group comically dissects his logic and how he’s been convicted of weapons charges four times already.
- Explores racial stereotypes and what they imagine Saba looked like—a segment filled with freewheeling (often edgy) humor.
Notable Quote
"He said he was attempting to have sexual relations with them..."
— Brady (16:23)
7. Thanksgiving Poll: Topics to Avoid
- A wine company commissioned a poll for the top 10 subjects to avoid during Thanksgiving: politics, religion, money, appearance, exes, and relationship status (18:35).
- The hosts swap stories about how quickly conversations can devolve into political fights, especially in mixed families.
- Mock strategies for keeping things civil and safe via benign conversation starters.
Notable Quote
"How many steps to get to Fox News?"
— John Holmberg (20:07)
8. Product News: Heinz Squeezable Gravy
- Brady delivers with uncharacteristic efficiency: Heinz has released a squeezable gravy bottle, exclusive at Walmart for leftover sandwiches (22:08).
9. Viral and Shocking Videos
- Arizona Road Rage: Video breakdown of a local road rage incident involving cars, fights, and an indifferent stray dog (23:06).
- Arizona Asians Instagram: Discovery and lampooning of an Instagram page allegedly about Asians in Arizona but featuring mostly car accidents.
- The hosts speculate about its origins, intended audience, and the stereotypes it (uncomfortably) traffics in (27:29).
Memorable Exchange
"Arizona Asians is just car wrecks. Which is hilarious."
— John Holmberg (27:31)
- Sinus Extraction Video: Grotesque but compelling video commentary on a massive booger extraction (28:36).
- Industrial Accident Training Film: Over-the-top safety film that plays out every workplace disaster imaginable (29:21).
- Pepper Spray Cop: Video (possibly AI) of a cop calmly pepper spraying an angry woman (31:04).
- Manhole Mishap: Surveillance video of a woman and her dog falling into a manhole (33:12).
- Goat Attack & Other Oddities: Series of bizarre, sometimes NSFW clips, including goat attacks and sex toy mishaps.
10. NSFW Oddities & Final Banter
- Commentary on the Asian sex doll market and a notorious vacuum/sex toy video (32:14–37:04).
- John reminisces about his dad’s infatuation with a hot Electrolux vacuum saleswoman, injecting a bit of storytelling nostalgia to close the main content.
Notable Quote
“The best part is you can't hear it over the vacuum destroying his penis.”
— John Holmberg (37:13)
Memorable Moments & Quotes (with Timestamps)
- Grilled Cheese Weather — “Look outside and tell me a grilled cheese waiting for you wouldn't be awesome right now.” (John, 02:03)
- Toilet Tech — “It's got the Internet... I got this thing on order.” (John, 05:11)
- Gold Bar Ethics — “You find gold, you go third world on that. You do not report it.” (John, 08:39)
- On Avoiding Thanksgiving Drama — “How many steps to get to Fox News?” (John, 20:07)
- Arizona Asians Page — “Arizona Asians is just car wrecks. Which is hilarious.” (John, 27:31)
- NSFW Vacuum Mishap — “The best part is you can't hear it over the vacuum destroying his penis.” (John, 37:13)
Notable Segment Timestamps
- Grilled Cheese Banter: 01:34–04:30
- Japanese Toilet Discussion: 05:09–05:46
- Gold Bars Found in France: 08:04–10:45
- Raccoons Becoming Pets: 13:29–15:46
- Saba Bonilla Gun Story: 15:46–17:12
- Thanksgiving Conversation Topics: 18:35–21:18
- Road Rage & Arizona Asians: 23:06–27:39
Conclusion
This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness delivers an amusing, candid ride through weird news, pop culture, questionable behavior, and personal anecdotes. The panel’s sharp, occasionally edgy wit is on full display as they bounce from international headlines to local oddities and NSFW viral videos, all punctuated by memorable one-liners and banter.
Note:
This summary intentionally omits ad reads, station promos, and non-content filler per instructions.