11-19-25 - FULL SHOW - WEDNESDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – November 19, 2025

Episode Overview

On this especially rainy Arizona morning, John Holmberg and the Morning Sickness crew – Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo – battle sleepiness, dish on local news coverage, debate the “Epstein files” release, muse about odd news stories, and roast local institutions like Maryvale's Chamber of Commerce with their signature irreverent and quick-witted banter. The tone ranges from sleepy and sardonic to raucous and absurd, all steeped in observational humor about the day’s events and Phoenix life.

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Main Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Weather, Sleepiness, and "Grilled Cheese Days"

• John opens by admitting he’s “faking” being awake after a perfect rainy night, declaring it a “grilled cheese day” (00:44)—the sort of cozy, lazy days when productivity feels optional.
• “Whatever you're doing, don't be so self important to think that it can't wait a day. I highly recommend you turn this show off right now and go right back to sleep.” (01:30, John)
• The crew fantasizes about instituting “nap time” radio and encourages listeners (and their boss, Trip) to take the day off, riffing on modern “wellness days”.

2. Local News in the Rain: The Reporter Splash Game

• Hysterical roasting of how Phoenix news channels cover rain—sending reporters to stand in puddles, warning of “flooding” where it’s just a slow storm drain.
• Idea: viewers purposely aim to splash rain reporters with trucks/jeeps for ratings gold. “$5000 to anybody who gets the big drench on one of these guys and wrecks some of our cars built in the community.” (06:12, John)
• “They’re the reason people will hydroplane and kill other people is because he set up shop in the circle of doom.” (05:38, John)
• Memories of the past: John’s old radio antics launching water balloons at lying TV news crews who pretended to be in field locations, with stories of local on-air feuds.

3. Media Fabrications and Accountability

• Longtime Phoenix newsies outed for pretending to be out “on scene” when they were on rooftops, including now-politician Mary Kim Titlow and radio correspondent Jim Cross.
• “I'm proving you guys are fake journalists. Come on, man.” (12:10, John)
• Holmberg’s shenanigans supposedly put a stop to this, exposing how easy it was to see through their setups.

4. Homelessness and Empty Office Buildings Rant

• John’s pet peeve: News reports lamenting “nowhere for the homeless to go” in bad weather, when downtown boasts huge empty corporate buildings.
• “Put them in there and then in the morning rustle them out like rats. Let them walk around when the weather's better and if it's raining, you just stuff them in there.” (16:40, John)
• Sharp critique of local reluctance for obvious solutions: “If you care, fix it. Because it's easy—if you don’t, shut up.” (17:14, John)

5. Epstein Files and the Perils of “Releasing it All”

• Discussion shifts to the Congressional debate over publicizing Jeffrey Epstein’s case files. John admits feeling both curious and uneasy:
• “Don't pull that sweater thread. You don't know what's going to take down and it might hurt us in the end.” (22:55, John)
• Debate over privacy: innocent acquaintances caught up by association, referencing John Gruden’s downfall as a cautionary tale about out-of-context private messages.
• “I can't really think of a friend I like that I haven't sent something to... taken out of context, I'm ostracized. That's all of us.” (27:32, John)

6. Humor on Dark News: Text Chains & Sex Island

• Candid tales about what actually populates their group threads (“our texts are awful”), including horrifying and hilarious videos, and the danger of any of those messages coming to light.
• Absurdity of being linked by text to a billionaire’s eventual scandal: “You meet a friend who has a plane, they get a little more grace... What if he has an island? ...Yeah, I do, billionaire pal. Do you know why they call it Sex Island? Like, I have a pretty good idea...” (33:49–34:39)
• Argument: selectivity is required—the “gotcha” game destroys reputations over mere proximity, not wrongdoing.

7. Trump's "Piggy" Comment and Modern Decorum

• The show lampoons Trump’s latest headline-grabbing insult to a female reporter (“Quiet, Piggy!”), using it to illustrate how the political climate now asks “what did she do to deserve that?” versus “should a president do that?”
• “He spun it to where people are like, you know, what did she do to deserve that?...You’re not supposed to call people piggy when you’re the president.” (37:32, John)
• Reflection on shifting standards and public expectations—often with more concern for the instigator than for decorum.

8. Maryvale's Chamber of Commerce & Visit Rwanda: Satire of Tourist Marketing

• Extended riff on the challenge of marketing Maryvale (a local, less-desirable neighborhood) and Rwanda (clad in genocide history) as tourist destinations.
• “Who started a resort in Rwanda after that movie?...You just move away.” (66:48, John)
• Created parallels between hiring newscasters and strippers: selection for diversity, “body positivity,” and ratings appeal (55:32–56:16).
• Visit Rwanda's Clippers jersey sponsorship is mercilessly mocked as a masterclass in PR futility, “That’s all I’d be thinking about—don’t watch that movie. It’s too soon.” (59:58, John)

9. Milk-Sweating Woman & Other Bizarre News

• John recounts a story about a woman sweating milk from her armpits. Actual diagnosis: “got a boob growing under her boobs...her sweat glands now just ooze this white milk” (76:46).
• Predictably devolves into the crew fantasizing about cereal options and the taste of “armpit milk,” in a way only Morning Sickness can make both disgusting and hilarious.
• “I'm gonna see you, Brady. You take some cereal and you pour it in there and get ready...” (80:44, John)

10. Working from Home is a "Grift"

• John rails against the notion that “working from home” is real work, poking fun at coworkers’ justifications.
• “People who work from home are running the greatest grift on the planet...you’re sleeping till nine and you’re keeping the phone on high.” (49:59, John)
• Calls out those who claim to be too busy at home, knowing full well they aren't working as hard as they claim.

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Sleepiness & the Day:
  • “There's this energy you hear is artificial. Nothing about me says go today at all. Not even close.” (01:04, John)
  • “It's nap time. We're gonna take the next 45 minutes and do nothing. We're just gonna sleep.” (02:59, John)
• On News Reporters Standing in Rain:
  • “They’re the reason people will hydroplane and kill other people...they set up shop in the circle of doom.” (05:25, John)
  • “Send out target boy on rainy days and find puddles...$5,000 to anybody who gets the big drench on one of these guys.” (06:12, John)
• On Old Newscaster Feuds:
  • “I would scream, brought to you by the king of beer's Budweiser, suck on this Titlow, we'd say. And then we'd chuck water balloons.” (10:31, John)
• On Homelessness:
  • “Put them in there and then in the morning rustle them out like rats...homeless yoga. I don't know.” (16:40, John)
• On Recording Scandals:
  • “Don't pull that sweater thread. You don't know what’s going to take down and it might hurt us in the end.” (22:55, John)
  • “Focusing in on just who did what and releasing the files to the general morons could be dangerous, could be horrifying.” (27:32, John)
• On Trump's "Piggy" Gaffe:
  • “We all know better...you’re not supposed to call people piggy when you’re the president.” (38:01, John)
• On Maryvale, Visit Rwanda, and Tourist PR:
  • “Visit Rwanda. You gotta balls on you, Clippers.” (70:07, John)
  • “Maryvale's Chamber of Commerce...the hardest job...try to get people to do tourism in Maryvale.” (146:36, John)
• On Woman Sweating Milk:
  • “She has a boob growing under her boobs...her sweat glands now just ooze this white milk.” (76:46, John)
  • “Would you taste it? ...In the heat of passion, you see, she's like, yeah — I'm gonna give that a taste.” (79:49, John)
• On Remote Work:
  • “Working from home's the biggest grift alive...every person that says, I work from home, ask them, go, what’d you do yesterday? Watch how mad they get.” (49:59, John)
• On Chamber of Commerce Diversity (Strip Club Analogy):
  • “To hire newscasters is a lot like being a strip club owner. You’ve gotta have a white one, a black one, a Mexican, a blonde, brunette, redhead, fat one, skinny one, and a short one.” (54:14, John)

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Key Timestamps

• 00:45–02:59 – Rainy day descriptions, “grilled cheese day” mood, encouragement to sleep in, news coverage critique.
• 06:11–14:30 – News media in the rain, memories of reporter balloon attacks, past Phoenix TV news blunders.
• 16:20–17:23 – Rant on homelessness and empty office buildings.
• 21:45–34:39 – Deep dive: Epstein files, texting scandals, personal privacy, “Sex Island” hypothetical.
• 37:17–38:51 – Trump’s “Piggy” moment; politics and modern standards.
• 55:32–57:34 – News anchors as strip club hires, ratings through sex appeal, Chamber of Commerce as metaphor.
• 59:58–70:20 – Visit Rwanda ad campaign and Chamber of Commerce mockery.
• 76:39–83:52 – Woman sweating milk: body oddity, cereal fantasies, comic disgust.
• 91:20–101:33 – Grilled cheese talk, humor about Velveeta, more on “working from home grift”.
• 149:17–152:55 – Rock Wars segment: Maryvale's Chamber of Commerce theme songs, musical showdowns.
• 160:00–164:36 – Entertainment news: Maxwell & Paris Hilton, Snoop Dogg’s gin, music rights sales.

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Episode Highlights

1. Rain Coverage Satire

A signature bit on the show—Phoenix media’s over-the-top rain coverage is mercilessly skewered with personal war stories about sabotaged broadcasts and the suggestion of a “splash-a-reporter” contest.

2. Unfiltered Look at The “Release Everything” Movement

Holmberg provides a rare, self-aware critique of the push for total transparency, warning listeners of the dangers of a world where every private text or joke can be weaponized—making the case with stories about infamous firings and his own group chat antics.

3. Local & Global Satire

From dissecting the marketing futility of “Visit Rwanda” to comparing news anchor hiring to strip club rosters, the crew provides roast-level commentary on local institutions, branding campaigns, and American obsessions with diversity optics.

4. Rock Wars: Maryvale Theme Song

The team crowns Cypress Hill’s “Insane in the Brain” as the tongue-in-cheek winner for Maryvale’s ideal theme song, after a lively showdown with picks ranging from “No Money, No Fiesta” to Body Count’s “Talk S***, Get Shot”.

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Overall Tone & Style

• Loose, conversational, and unapologetically irreverent, the crew blends humor with pointed social observation—with healthy doses of local color, dark jokes, and willingness to laugh at themselves and “taboo” topics.
• Absurd hypothetical situations (Sex Island, “milk sweat” cereal bars, splashing news reporters) are common, alluded to with both comic disgust and glee.

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For First-Time or Non-Listeners

This episode is emblematic of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness—combining sleep-deprived honesty, inside jokes about Phoenix, razor-sharp satire of the media and news topics, and hilarious descents into “what-if” scenarios. Whether it’s the group’s critique of transparency culture, or a tangent about the taste of “armpit milk,” the show’s blend of topicality and blue-collar humor is both welcoming and subversive, always reminding you not to take any of it too seriously.

Those seeking “serious” news will find chaos; those looking for comic relief—especially about the ridiculousness of both local and national headlines—will find a home here.

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Further Listening Suggestions

• If you enjoyed the media lampooning, try other episodes after big local weather events.
• For recurring themes, seek out “Rock Wars” or episodes after controversial national news, where the crew’s satirical style is at its sharpest.

Transcript

[A]

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[B]

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[A]

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[B]

Easy. LegalGunbuyer do. And he can do it all online. It's really that simple.

[A]

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[C]

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[B]

Got a 20 foot range.

[C]

If you hit the puddle right in a jeep or a truck, you can hit way past the sidewalk and you can throw it forward. It's pretty awesome. He's the reason people will hydroplane and kill other people is because he set up shop in the circle of doom. And he. And he stood there. That's another one. They just keep. Troy. They just keep blazing by here. Top speeds. I don't think people realize that this intersection is flooded. Yes they do. And you're the reason why they're going fast. And you notice none of the Hyundai's are doing it. It's just bro dozers and jeeps and like dudes who can handle it. And he goes, those guys are the fastest ones to hydro. They're not going to hydroplane. They're getting you. They're. They're pushing you over the edge. They're asking for it.

[A]

That's what's happening.

[B]

Begging.

[C]

Put a target on. You know what that would. Local news doesn't do well like it used to. It's not as, you know, relevant as it once was. If you send out target boy on rainy days and find puddles and slide and Troy Hayden sitting back on channel 12, right? We got 14 reporters out at 14 different intersections with some slow storm drains. $5,000 to anybody who gets the big drench on one of these guys and wrecks some of Our cars built in the community.

[B]

I think lifted trucks and jeeps have like a. It's like an Amber alert.

[C]

Oh, yeah. Oh, I have it on my. Yeah. You know, maybe not a bad ide from the people. I just bought my Bronco from lifted trucks that they actually have. This is a nice little feature right here. It's shows you where the newscasters are on rainy days.

[A]

We do a promo with them today. We should have given away a word of the day. Let's get with them and soak.

[C]

Newscaster test drive the trucks from lifted trucks into the news guys who are standing on the corner of I'm an idiot and dip lane.

[A]

This is great.

[C]

It's perfect. And I mean, talk about ratings boosts for. For the local news, who you know, especially, I would imagine channel 15 not doing so great. You see, you get a chance to take Javier Soto and drench him, or you give me that R Roller. I call him an R. Roller is on tv. You give me that R Roller, and he's standing out there on the side of the road, and you're like, I'm going to drench the R. Roller. You got yourself some ratings right there. Your name is Jorge Torres. I'm sorry. Don't do that. You're putting a lot of pressure on me, Jorge. Come on. You're probably a pretty nice guy, but Jorge Torres, that's a little over the top. You're done there. What are you, a matador? You're a weatherman. You're Jorge. You're George Torres. Don't. And now let's take a look over here. All right, now, nobody's saying this but you down in you ma. Calm down, Jorge. This is how my grandmother said it, right? Okay. I'm sure that my Swedish grandmother said John different, but I'm not throwing that bomb around. You're George now. But yeah, bombing them with the. It's a great idea. It really is. But will they take that idea? I don't know. Troy Hayden, you're out there. Maybe he's listening right now. Maybe. Ian Schwartz over at Channel three. Take that Holly Bach. Put her in a white T shirt, stand her in a corner. Your ratings are gonna go through the moon.

[A]

I'm taking your jeep right now.

[C]

We're not doing a show. I'm Holly Bach, and I'm standing on 52nd Street. Where am I? McDowell. I'm like, Bye. We're right there. This show would just be us dicking around and calling back Brady, man the foot. Brandy, do you know how to work Any of this. No. I don't care. Come with us. Yeah, just hit a button. Sometimes when it turns red, go boop, boop, boop, and then turn it off again. We're going up there to drench Holly Bach and take pictures.

[B]

Remember years ago, the one morning show.

[C]

Yeah. That was done the producer out.

[A]

What happened?

[C]

They used to send their stupid producer monkey boy out to get after a rain. But it's. But they're idiots. That's radio.

[B]

And he'd suit up for, yeah, but it's radio. Yay.

[C]

He came back wet. And they took pictures. There was no Internet to put it on. It was like, what's the point? TV, though. We got a little something. Got a little something. Didn't you guys just throw water balloons? Water balloon. Channel 12. Because they lied about where they were standing. I used to water balloon the. I had water balloons on standby for my afternoon show. And Channel 12 would stand on their roof across the street and go, live from McKellops and Val Vista. I'm like, no, he isn't. He's right. And I was watching in the studio, the TV was on it. I'm like, I can see that dickhead. If I go outside, he's standing on the roof. And they would just stand at different angles of the roof. Like, if they were mesa, they'd stand and they'd have, like, superstition mountain behind them. I'm like, these pricks are lying. They never leave the building. And so I would scream, brought to you by the king of beer's Budweiser. Suck on this. Mary Kim Titlow was the lady who did it the most. So we suck on this Titlow, we'd say. And then we'd chuck water balloons. I've seen McLaughlin would act like he was. He was always on the roof going, we're out here, you know, it's about to rain. I'm at Granada Park. Like, no, you're not. I see your dumb little head poking on. And then he would go, oh, boy, we got water balloons. So we got incoming. And then they'd run around the top of the building, and then they'd stop. Dave Muncie was bad at it. The dude who used to. He used to stand right outside Channel 10 and say he was somewhere else. I'm like, you're literally two steps out the back door of Channel 10 on Van Beer, and I know exactly where you are. And they got upset when we chucked water balloons at them because it was street level. So it was just. Do you ever get one.

[A]

Oh, on camera.

[C]

McLaughlin. We had. It was. It was. Remember when it was on. Oh, it was on when we first attacked Iraq back in the 90s. It was that thing just recently when Israel. And they were intercepting all those bombs you just saw. We had three dudes take my. And Ted Nolan, who never likes to talk about this, brought me a. Two Budweiser coolers filled with water balloons because he thought it was great. And he goes, there you go. And I'm like, I'm gonna say, it's brought to you by Budweiser. Goes, I wish you wouldn't. I'm like, well, I'm gonna. And I said, brought to you by Budweiser, the king of beers. Take that, Titla. That was what you had to scream as you did it. And one dude outside, you remember the channel 12 building was down by the old zone. One dude was screaming it so loud it was getting picked up on the roof. You could hear in the. In the distance. He's like, what? And then scene. McLaughlin ducked in the weather report. And he looked around like, what the hell? And then it was like he had two friends and multiple water balloons just started sailing over his head. I mean, he was. And he ran. Somebody throwing water balloons at us. And then he continued his weather report.

[B]

He laid down in the two apple crates that were stacked.

[C]

Yeah, we had to jump down from his. Yeah. His forefoot, like, to make him look like a human man, he had to leap off of that. It was the best. And then, you know, that was one of my favorite things ever. I don't remember the guy's name, but he was the news director for Channel 12. And he came over and asked if we would stop bombarding his. His reporters. And I said, well, then stop saying you're somewhere you're not. I'm proving you guys are fake journalists. Come on, man. And that was the whole meeting. Come on, man. Like, don't say scene. McLaughlin is in Glendale. When I can see his dumb little head when I go outside. Never happened again. It was like they. They took. I was, you know, some idiot just sitting there throwing water balloons at people. Like, he's right. We probably shouldn't lie about that anymore. Mary Kim Titler was a reporter in town. She was the laziest one ever. If there was a murder, she'd pretend to be outside of it, and she'd stand up on the roof, and I'm like, you're on the roof. You're. You're nowhere near where you say you are.

[B]

They're overtaken early on. They got into the game late. These storm teams are killing us on these other channels.

[C]

It was awesome. I miss it, but yeah. Lifted trucks. You're not a client or anything, but you're about to be. Just because I met the guys over there and bought a truck from them, I think.

[A]

There she is.

[C]

There's Mary Kim Titlow. What's she up to?

[A]

She's a politician, apparently.

[C]

Holy smokes. Is she? She say she's somewhere and she isn't. Are there any pictures of her saying she's at the Grand Canyon and she's just like, you know, at Sears.

[A]

Oh, she was a politician in 2008.

[C]

She lost, huh? For lying, I bet. For lying about living where she said she was representing stuff. She was never where she said she was. Every time I saw her, I'm out on the reservation. Once she said, she's out on the reservation. There used to be a field on Third Street. Remember that, Brady? There's Third street right by where Margaret T. Hans was. They built tons of restaurants and stuff there now. But right behind Channel 12 was just an empty dirt lot.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

They did an overhead shot of her like it was artistic. And she said, you know, out on the reservation, this, this, this, and this. And I'm like. You could see just in the background to the parking lot to channel 12. And I'm like, this broad is 45ft from the station, and she says she's up in Navajo land. Liar. We didn't have any water balloons that day. It was a. It was like a daily feature on my afternoon show to watch Channel 12 and tell people they're lying.

[B]

Well, there is an argument that one time that might have been. Now, Navaj. She was saying.

[C]

She was like, the drive to Flagstaff today was a hairy one. And I'm like, no, it's not. You're 18ft from your desk. We got a little traffic up on the i17 on our way in. I'm like, you're standing outside your work. Liar.

[A]

Yeah, but Jim Cross did the same thing in radio.

[C]

Cross never.

[B]

Master.

[C]

Jim Cross never left that building. He's probably still there. Jim Cross? Yeah. Yeah, he could. Yeah. Jim Cross outside of a dark building at 4 in the morning. I'm not going anywhere sharp.

[B]

That's why I retired. He wanted to travel finally.

[C]

Yeah, I want to get out of this building. I haven't been out of this building in 35 years. What do you mean? Every morning you're standing in front of some. You bought that bull. Jim Cross gate. The Air news. Go. Yeah. Jim Cross was always like our correspondent Jim Cross is live on the scene. Yeah, Jim, I can see it through the window. I'm out outside the studio. Why do we lie to them? I don't know. The lies, tons of lies. I don't know that they do that anymore. I think I may have helped with that. Channel 12 lied every day in the late 90s, early 2000s until I started to attack them with water balloons. Now if you want a real program on TV and get your new stuff back in order, quit wasting my time with cooking segments and food I'm never going to have and start putting people out by puddles and smashing them. That's genius. If you really. And here's the other thing. They were doing a homeless thing yesterday about the homeless have nowhere to go in the rain. Is anyone. Am I the smartest person on the planet? I feel like I'm in idiocracy. We haven't used the Chase 40, 48 story building downtown that has been empty for four years. Put them in there.

[B]

There's a lot of capacity available.

[C]

Stuff them in a floor. There was like, there was like over 100 people have nowhere to go tonight. And I'm like, just open the doors to the empty building. There's another one on Camelback and Central. They haven't been able to get that thing going. It's way off budget. They trying to put apartments in there and it failed for.

[B]

It's got.

[C]

It's been six years. It's just windows. Put them in there and then in the morning rustle them out like rats. Let them walk around when the weather's better and if it's raining, you just stuff them in there. It's like an awning. And while we're not using it. Quit telling me that. I got to spend money. When you got a perfectly good 48 story building no one's using at all. That thing is empty. It's the biggest building in Phoenix and it's empty.

[B]

Still. Huh.

[C]

There's nothing to do with it. It needs to be rented. They were going to make apartments out of it. It was like a billion dollars to try to do that. And it's like not going to do it. So just put up some cubicles, throw down a few mats and say have at it. Homeless.

[B]

And people say after floor of just yoga.

[C]

Maybe the second floor you've got 48 homeless yoga. I don't know. But it seems like we're like, oh, we've got a homeless problem. People don't care. I'M like, well, there's that empty building. We can't do that. They'll mess it up. And I'm like, well, then we don't really care. Then shut up. If you care, fix it. Because it's easy if you don't shut up. No, we need people to give money to it. Like, for what? There's an empty building. No one's using. Can't put them in there. What if we use it someday? What are they gonna. They're not poison. They're just homeless. They'll do drugs. Yeah, that's why they're okay. So we don't care. Let them. Let them rot. No, we can't do that. Like, put them in the empty building. Jesus Christ, how stupid are you? Go stand by a puddle. I'm done with this. But yeah, the reason that there's hydroplaning on rainy days is news people. Because I watched intersection flood in that last storm. And there couldn't have been more respect from the travelers of Phoenix. It was in Scottsdale Tempe. Scottsdale area. And everybody went about two miles an hour. And you know why? Because Mary Kim Titlow wasn't standing on the sidelines there with cameras and lights and stuff. And I'm gonna be on tv like, you try to those people up. It's smart. So good luck news. If you want some. If you want some damn reporting and you want some damn ratings, talk to me. That guy just said, man, Hollybach in a white T shirt, no bra, cold water puddle. AZ family with a 30 share. They're for the win. Absolutely. It would be super bowl numbers. And then you'd go, you want to talk about. And they're always, you know, beating themselves over for trying to get on viral and get a national news story. This is easy. This is easy. We want to have some pride and decorum. Well, all right. Well, good luck with that because I'm not going to get your ratings with that. I noticed you never let Holly go on there and sweats and, you know, like a bun. She's always done up pretty good. So you kind of deep down know the sexier she is, the better the ratings. I noticed you don't hire many ugly people, so you kind of know. So let's step it up a notch and put her outside the water and tell her if you're gonna have her standing in the rain to tell us it's raining, make it worth our time.

[B]

The monsoon award goes to.

[C]

Oh, she'd be. She'd be network in a week. See that lady and Phoenix got quite a lot of attention. Over a million clicks in one day. And their ratings went from a 1 share to a 44. What'd they do? Put her in a white T shirt, Stood her in the rain in Phoenix. God damn it. Who's the genius programmer that came up with that idea? He's on the radio, sir. An idiot from the radio. My God. Yeah. Stupid people. And even Royal Norman would be funny if he was in a white T shirt standing on the side. You get those big cans of Royal Normans wet.

[A]

I'd do it.

[B]

He takes some people out.

[C]

Yeah. Schwartz can wear one of those weird thongs and just bend over and take a bunch of water from behind for his audience or something. Yeah, his. Put Schwartz in the Borat and oh, my God, Melrose would light on fire that whole district. Oh, just the. In Schwartz bent, overtaking the Borat waters.

[B]

You just hear water day.

[C]

Yeah, it's. It's a play day. And I know there'll be some loser lawyer that would. You know, there's a liability if someone tries to splash reporter and crashes. Yeah, but you'll have so much money from advertising nationally that you'll be able to pay those bills. Simple stuff. But I am. Today we're all going to be faking it. It's just a drowsy way to start the day. And it feels so nice to just lay there. The alarm goes off and you're smiling and you just blip. Snooze. There's a chance I'm never getting up. So nice. So nice. Another thing I saw yesterday that was hilarious. I think maybe what The Epstein files are both interesting and annoyingly uninteresting to me, because I have a feeling, you know, this is just gonna keep going, like, okay, we're past them to release them, and now it goes through Senate. Now it's on Trump's desk, and they're gonna release them. And then I saw last night there are loopholes that make it almost impossible to release. I'm like, oh, did we just go through this over again for more fluff? Well, yeah. And I don't know. Look, I'm getting.

[B]

Who doesn't he have a picture with?

[C]

Right?

[A]

That's true.

[C]

There's a dude named Larry Summers who has already preemptively apologized and said he's deeply ashamed of his interaction with Epstein because he. He was asking him about romantic advice after Epstein had already kind of gotten in trouble. He's like, how do you do it? I'm struggling with this broad. You got Any advice for me? He's like, yeah, well, how old is she? It's like, I don't know. She's. Well, I was gonna say you should write her a note and leave it in class, but, you know, that's the Epstein way. So I'm not. I'm not for the criminal aspect of it, but the release of this and the argument is it's gonna hurt the one guy that voted against it. His argument was pretty sound. He goes, look, he was thinking the way we should think as men. Everybody was screaming, release the files. I agree. We should know some stuff. Although I have said, don't pull that sweater thread. You don't know what's going to take down and it might hurt us in the end. John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's Morning Sickness. He's the one guy that said, I'm not voting to release these. Said it was going to hurt a lot of innocent people.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

And I started thinking I would be in on that. First off, a billionaire, I don't know that well. Texting me jokes is going to get jokes back. A billionaire I don't know that well that's got an island and a plane that wants. Like, I've been. I made friends with my. My friend Dr. Brink, and he's got a plane and he's got stuff. I don't know. Brink's past. I don't know what he's going to get in trouble for in the future, but already Brink and I are going back and forth on some pretty heady, hilarious stuff 10 years from now, 15 years from now, suddenly Brink's in trouble because he's, you know, banging zoo animals or something. I don't know. I don't think Jeff's doing that. Sorry, Jeff. Or, you know, and then it's like, we're going to release all of his text for the last 20 years. I'm like, oh, like that dude in the. In the house was thinking of guys like us. He was thinking rationally, like, do you really want everyone you've ever known that you've texted, if they've done something wrong, to have all their text released? Go no further than Jon Gruden. John Gruden wasn't under investigation. They went through emails and found one from John Gruden that said that the dude he hated had lips like the Michelin tires. I know that makes Brett laugh, and it made me laugh, too. And they're like, he's using racist tropes and he's Gruden's are. What'd I do, man? What? Tell you what, man. I was just texting about that dude with the big lips. And he did have big lips. You can't say that about the certain person he said it about, but the guy had huge lips, and Jon Gruden hated him. So he took his noticeable feature and made a joke about it. He wasn't under investigation for anything, and he lost his job and can't get a job in his industry again. Innocent person in that regard, with a Fighting back. Oh, he fought back as best he can. He's got enough money to do it, but he still can't get a job doing what he wants.

[B]

They always throw him in the mix, whether it's college or.

[C]

He might get it. He might. It might be like a Brennaman thing where he didn't really do much wrong other than he said something that all of us have been guilty of doing at one point or another in our lives and got busted at a dumb time. Said it stupid on a stupid spot. It was dumb followed by dumb followed by dumb. And you got spanked for it. A little excessively. Gruden will get a job being, like Hofstra's coach someday, and it won't matter just because he loves it so much. But, you know, it's down the road. It's not anytime soon. I don't think that's what happens when you release all the files. And this one dude's like. And I started thinking, I don't know. Aside from actually acting on it. Our texts are horrible.

[B]

Horrible.

[C]

Oh, absolutely. And not just with you idiots. I've got three or four threads. I bet you need to. Oh, yeah. I got friends groups that are just brutal. For instance, last night I had my friends. Well, I'm not. My God, Mark. A friend named Jeff. Who is Jeff? Jeff Thompson. I'll throw his name out there, send it to just a terrible. And Jeff. It was Jeff who sent it to everybody. And my buddy Jordan, disgraced doctor who lost everything. Sent a video of a guy having a dildo removed from his body. And then the comments after.

[A]

Oh, you didn't send it to us.

[C]

Didn't I? I thought I did. Oh, I'll fire it right now. Looking at right now, boys. There you go. But it's like one of those. It's one of those things that you would play for us. It was stuck. And the doctor had his arm three quarters of the way up this poor man's ass. And they are pulling the doctor to try to remove this from his ass. I thought I did send this to you guys.

[A]

Did you?

[C]

Yeah. I don't know how old the person is on the table. I don't know what went on. I don't know if this was an abuse situation or if it was voluntary. I just know I laughed hysterically. And we all decided this was something we would joke about mainly towards Jeff, who's a very serious businessman.

[B]

Ah, there it is.

[C]

You know, there you go. Enjoy it. Thanks. Great stuff. Maybe put it in your videos later today because it's very strange.

[A]

Don't watch it, Brady. I may use that because it.

[C]

I don't know that it. Yeah, don't. Yeah, don't watch it, Brady. It's not for you right now. But I don't know if it's a dildo or a fence pipe or a post. It's huge. Our texts are awful. And if one of us went to jail for something and they went through them, all of them. Explain yourself is going to definitely be part of it.

[A]

We've talked about that in the past. You know, one of us goes, we're scrubbing the other one's phone. Oh, yeah, I mean, that's just. That's.

[C]

Yeah, done. I don't. You know, people say that. This one says, John, this email says, crap, you got a great point there. You cannot get into any trouble ever, John. If they go through your emails and see some of the stuff I've sent you over the years, I'm going to prison just for knowing you. Taken out of context, I'm ostracized. That's all of us. So focusing in on just who did what and releasing the files to the general morons could be dangerous, could be horrifying. I can't really think of a friend I like that I haven't sent something to. And I've sent terrible stuff to people and hilarious stuff to people just that I don't even know these emails. Britt's been great about this. All those videos that you show people ask for me, like, nope, like you won't do it because you don't know them. You don't know them.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And you don't know if they're like sitting in a car watching the videos on their phone with 24 year olds that they drive to or maybe they're a school bus driver and the next thing you know, like, who sent you this? Oh, Brett Fesley from KUPD sent this to me. What the hell is going on?

[A]

I've shown them to people. Like if, if they're. If I'M out somewhere they wouldn't like. All right, there you go. It's on my phone. There you go.

[C]

Yeah. Once it's out of your hands, I don't know who's going to do it for who.

[B]

Yeah. The thing where they sign the.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

Should have waivers.

[B]

There's.

[C]

Maybe there should be a little disclaimer before you open any of these. Like, we can tag it and say, I need you to click on this.

[B]

They try to do you over 18.

[C]

Oh, no, no, that's for sites. I'm saying if I sent Brady something, I'm like, this one's a little weird. I'm not trusting Brady. I'm going to tag it with one of those, hey, click on this and take all the responsibility that if you decide to use this, anything that happens from your phone can't come back to me. Lawyers should get on that. But these Epstein files are gonna get. You know, that dude's right. A lot of people who just didn't know. And again, I put myself in those shoes. If a billionaire from New York who was having parties, and I'm looking around and I see Clinton and Trump and Obama, and I'm like, jesus, I am hobnobbing with the elites of Earth. The last thing I'm thinking to myself is, I gotta get out of this. I wanna stay for a long time.

[A]

Is this gonna go?

[C]

Yeah. Like, how far does this go? And I'm like, the waiters look a little young. Anyway, I'm ignoring a lot of red flags, especially if I'm just there every once in a while. And then I wake up in the morning and Epstein sent over a, you know, an Indian getting a dildo ripped out of his ass. And I'm like, ah, how many times that happened to you, Jeff? Because I'm gonna throw it back and forth. I'm in for it if you are. You wanna do that to me? You've got billions. It's. You got it, buddy. Next thing you know how to context in a courtroom, I'm the idiot. I. I'm like, didn't you want to get raped by him? Says here in your text. I'm up for that if you are billionaire. Like, Jesus Christ. Yeah, I did say that, but yes, I did. Yes, I did. Now you're Johnny Depp on the yes, I did. You want to rape and burn the body of your ex. Yes, I do, but not literally.

[B]

There's good news. He did not get in trouble for that. Yes, but you had to go through that.

[C]

He paid a lot of money and he sat. He sat in a courtroom a long time. And who was the one we remember most from that? Paul Bettany. He had nothing to do with it other than to be in the other side of Johnny Depp's text saying he wanted to kill and burn Amber Heard's body. And he sent it to a friend. And next thing you know, you're in a courtroom and think about it, he got away with it. We're talking about it by name again. Did he Runny Depp had some hilarious text. So I'm just saying I'm into it, but I'm trying to think of the idea of, like, how many people. I mean, we've had people on this show, listeners and stuff that we've befriended that have gone to jail for some stuff that have been on the news. You're like, that dude listens. I was paling around for a whole night with that murderer. That was the. The. He was at the zombie Kill the zombie. I didn't know what. I'm in pictures with the guy. People send him to me. Remember this? Yeah, man, they do now.

[A]

I wish I was in Johnny Depp's text message thread, man.

[C]

It would have gotten worse. Oh, I'm in the documentary of the zombie killer on 48 hours and then on Dateline. I didn't do that voluntarily. They have video of him and I'm standing there. Now, granted, I'm dressed as a Halloween scary thing. I know it's me. There's pictures of people. Hey, that's that guy from the radio. I'm in the documentary. When you first see the documentary first starts, he was known to dress as a zombie and go to parties. And there I am waving, and he's right behind me. And he had his car, and his car was decorated with real entrails. Who's looking at the car in the documentary? Me. I talked about it.

[B]

You're fully made up right at the time?

[C]

Yeah. And that one I was made up, but the first one, I was just skull paint. Like, you can tell it's me, if you know me. You're like, hey, that's a good costume. That looks like Holmberg. And then you're like, that is him. I told the ladies at a doctor's office, I was sitting in there, and she goes, has anybody watched the Zombie killer thing that came out?

[B]

I'm like.

[C]

I looked at him like, I'm in it.

[B]

What?

[C]

And then she pulls it up on her phone, and I'm like, that's me. Oh, my God. You're in the first shot. I know. Tell me about it. I didn't know that either. Did you know him? I'm like, stop it. We're done here. Yes, I did.

[B]

It was no longer a client there.

[C]

Yeah, I'm not allowed in there anymore. And me and the doctor started talking, but, yeah, I don't know who my good friends are with, you know, Jesus. They got planes, and I got people who I like. This guy's awesome. If I just took Dr. Brink, we went to Sedona and stayed in the same house, our texts could be, you know, construed as terrifying. I don't know if Brink's. I don't know what he's doing. You know, like, he's got a parrot at home. I don't know what he's doing.

[B]

He probably says the same thing about all his friends, right?

[C]

But you do. I'll tell you right now. You meet a friend who has a plane, they get a little more grace. I don't know why that is. They're just cooler. The much cooler than the two of you.

[A]

What if has one has an island.

[C]

And that plane goes to that island, and that island is gorgeous, and it's called Sex Island. And you don't know why yet, but you're on the plane to go there to find out. You would go, want to come to my Sex Island? Like, yep, on my private plane. Yes, I do. You know I do. And that text would be like, john, you want to fly the Lolita Express and go to Sex Island? Yeah, I do. Billionaire pal. Do you know why they call it Sex Island? Like, I have a pretty good idea. And then you go there and you're like, oh, my God, Sex island is criminal. Now all your texts say, yes, I want to go to your Sex Island. Please take me. That's where it ends. I don't know that it's ever going to get released. I'm getting kind of tired of the cat and mouse with these papers, because yesterday I was like, all right, finally it all comes out, and this will go away. And then the next story was, loopholes in the bill make it so certain aspects of the Epstein files can never be released. I'm like, oh, for Christ's sake.

[B]

Either side, if we can run with something that would ruin this candidate, right?

[C]

They're just. It's gotcha.

[B]

Rising Star, and we can just.

[C]

Huge game of gotcha.

[B]

Eliminate them.

[C]

But I do think Trump blinked the other day because he's getting a little antsy in that one reporter that started to talk. While he was talking, he Goes quiet Piggy. I'm like, oh, Jesus. He called a girl a pig on tv and I didn't get a look at her. I've noticed that CNN's handling that with like, my God. He called a woman piggy. Like, can we see a shot of her? Was he right beside the point? Like, I notice you guys aren't showing pictures of Piggy. And what if it was? I mean, that would be a great little cutaway if it turned out that Kermit. It was Miss Piggy. He was like, quiet Piggy. And he was seriously calling her by her name or just, she looks like that. He snapped a little.

[A]

I gotta find her.

[C]

Miss Piggy. Piggy reporter. I looked for like a minute last night, then I got distracted by something you sent, and off I went to Brett Island. Anyway, they're supposed to release those things, but the one dude, Larry Summers, came out and just first words, I'm deeply ashamed. I mean, he jumped ahead of it and I'm deeply ashamed of my relationship with him. I, I asked advice for relationships from Jeffrey Epstein after all the stuff had started. I, I was having some trouble and I basically said I continued to fulfill my, my obligations, but I'm gonna step away from public appearances because, yeah, you got me. I was like, did you do anything illegal? Ah, no. The guy was. It doesn't mean he didn't have good advice in certain areas. He's just a criminal. He's just a terrible person. Says for decades, Mr. Summers has demonstrated his attraction to serving the wealthy and well connected. Well, I got no problem with that. He had, he had the ability to distance himself from Jeffrey Epstein and didn't. And even everything that was publicly known about his sex offenses involving girls. Summers cannot be trusted to advise our nation's politicians, policymakers, and institutions. He's like a big deal at Harvard. That's Piggy.

[A]

That's Piggy.

[C]

She's okay. He shouldn't have called her Piggy.

[A]

Yeah, I don't think she was calling her fat.

[C]

Looks a little bit like Sarah Jessica Parker. Had a weird sister. Got that same sort of foot shaped face.

[A]

I don't think he was calling her Piggy because she's fat.

[C]

He just doesn't like her.

[B]

Yeah, that's his nickname for.

[C]

Maybe he likes her. Maybe she's. Maybe she's got a funny toe. Still shouldn't count people that it was.

[B]

Right.

[A]

Hilarious.

[C]

It's hilarious to jerks like us. But it wasn't right. Supposed to have some sort of decorum and he didn't. Although as Much as we enjoy when you call somebody who's annoying you piggy on TV and you're the president, when the president calls you piggy, I'm like, oh my.

[B]

What did she do?

[C]

Shouldn't do that. Yeah, that. What is. What did she do to deserve that? That's how Trump's turned this on its head. A whole 50% of the whole country just goes, yeah, but what was she doing? Like, you want her to respect him too, right? Like she was talking while he was talking. She didn't get called on. He called her piggy. I mean, it's like he spun it to where people are like, you know, what did she do to deserve that? Rather than like, he shouldn't do that and he shouldn't. We all know better. We all know you're not supposed to call people piggy when you're the president.

[A]

Yes, I did.

[C]

Of course I called her piggy. Did you see her? She's got that little foot face. And by the way, the way she was looking at me was straight up very snobby. So all I saw were nostrils. Piggy. Anyway, that's the thing. Be careful with your text. It's a good day to go back to our regular rule of cleanse. Go through your text today, start the deleting process now. That doesn't matter in a courtroom, but start the deleting process. So just be careful. You might be in there, you might be in the Epstein files and you don't even know it. You might.

[B]

That's why I was saying earlier who's. Who's not gonna be in it. Yeah, that guy was a mover and shaker and people wanted to meet with him because he could introduce you to this guy. And that guy.

[C]

I've sent some terrible stuff back and forth with John Lovitz. John Lovitz was in the 90s, hobnobbing pretty heavy with some of these hard hitting Trump people. Not that he's a great Trump guy. I'm just saying that he knew him. He's New York Trump. Was New York Trump. Beautiful, bouncing around that kind of world. I don't know if Lovitz is in this wouldn't surprise me if, I mean, Lovett's would be the first one on a plane called Sex Island. Destination Sex Island.

[B]

If you watch that first documentary about Epstein, he's connected, everybody.

[C]

I talked to Lovitz once and he was telling me how he's pals with Marlon Brando's son. He used to go over there all the time and talk with Brando and him, you know and the guy that he was friends with was the one that was like the brother of the murderer or whatever. They had all sorts of connections. I don't know what's going to come up someday. So just beware of screaming as loud as you can. Release everything Good Damn. I think we just. We slow bleed it and I'll get emails from people you got to know if somebody's committing crimes against children. I do agree with that. But that's where the release everything things we release everything that matters. Don't really stuff about me.

[B]

Who was it? The. The different but it's similar. The BTK killer.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

Was like on the board of the church.

[C]

Oh sure.

[B]

All those people that were associated just like that.

[C]

You don't know the problem would be.

[B]

Majority of them didn't know. I mean but there. There I am a picture with a.

[C]

Guy I talked with Brian Callan after that lady accused him of sexual assault.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

And I said, you've been awesome. I've never known you to not be awesome to me. And I said, so until you. If you tell me this didn't happen, I'm going to believe you because you've been a friend. And I said, and I know it doesn't mean anything to you, but this little Phoenix radio will be a backup for you so long as you tell me everything. If anything comes out where you, you know, like, lied to me, I've got to pull away. You understand? He goes. And he even said, he goes, you'd find out who your friends are in these situations. He goes, it's the best. The best message I could have gotten. And he goes, and I'm telling you from the bottom of my heart, none of this is real. I'm like, okay, I'll believe you. I took a chance there just in case. Because he's like, if I need your show, I will use it. And I'm like, it's there for you. I will believe you. But if you. If it turns out you're lying, you're screwing me for. For being your pal because I'll take that job. Like if Brady right now is like, oh my God, what are they accusing you of? And I'm like, if you look me in the eyes right now and say, I did not do this, I'm gonna roll with you until I can't.

[B]

Arthur Blank.

[C]

Arthur Blank and Michael Vick. It's a perfect example of somebody just getting kicked in the nuts hard by somebody. Arthur Blank just said, did you do this? Because if you did, I Have to let you go. If not, I'm going to stand by you. And Michael Vick swore up and down I had nothing to do with this. This is all crap. And Arthur Blank stood behind a podium and said, this young man didn't do anything wrong. And man, oh, man. And then he had to cut ties with him, like, immediately. He's like, he lied to me. And. And actually, Arthur Blank was pretty smart about how he handled that. It's like I. Look, what am I gonna do? The guy bailed on me. So just be careful when you start screaming. And we should know everything. Yeah, I've been saying this for years about that. That sweater thread. The whole sweater goes away. You're just looking for pieces of that sweater to go. The whole thing goes away. So I don't think they're ever going to release anything. But we'll find out. 6:25. Let's get a wake up song in this fake sleepy morning that we could all just. Just roll over, grab the other pillow. Oh, that pillow right now that you're not using on your bed. So chilled. And then you just put your head on it like, oh, sleep the day away. Call in sleepy. It's a perfect day to do it. You get next week. You're taking the whole week off anyway, so just nothing's happening.

[B]

Snow day.

[C]

Yeah, you're not. You're not that important at work, I'll tell you that right now. You may think you are, but you're not. I'm not either. Like, you call in, everybody's going to be fine. You know, that's why you can take vacations. They got you covered. I got too much to do. No, you don't.

[B]

It can wait a day if you're making Amazon delivery. Sorry.

[C]

Yeah, well, Amazon people. Yeah, you guys keep working. I got some windshield wipers I need.

[B]

Wake up.

[C]

I need them quickly. I have no windshield wipers. Driving around in that jeep this morning was. I am a hazard. I can't see a thing.

[B]

You just get them. I'll help you install.

[C]

Yeah, I know you can do it. I'll get you Amazon a ladder over here and see if I can get you to reach my windshield. Is 585-9800 is the phone number. You call it, tell us what you want to hear to wake up and we'll get her going. It's 98. Kup, wake up. It's out of control now. KUPD. Holberg's Morning Sickness. Morning Sickness. 98. There you go. It is miles to nowhere for a couple more Days. Our official theme song in the Lame Duck. Next week at this time, they will be the Lame Ducks. We will have a winner in Playdoh one week from today. And then we will begin next year's quest for a great Wake up song. We've been lucky because Miles to Nowhere crushed this year. Crushed it.

[A]

They didn't.

[B]

Re.

[A]

They didn't. They're not in this year.

[C]

One time winners. Last two years they've been in it. First year they were ridiculed heavily for being Katie and the Hobbs. Then last year won the whole damn thing with their fun and their frivolity. And they sang the song we made fun of the year before, which was even better. It was great. They were a lot of fun. They're a fun band. They're fun people. So we'll see as Playdoh gets going next week. Yikes. I'm getting all these emails from people on the Epstein thing, and there's some guys who are out there who are absolutely 100% right about, you know, making sure that you get everything right. Ramon is a listener and he emails and he said, where that go? Had a second ago.

[A]

Oh.

[C]

He basically said, you know, there are videos of all sorts of stuff all over the place. We should probably want to see that. Like, yeah, in a clean world, just the bad guys get hit. But I want to live where Ramon lives because it's a. It's a nicer place to assume that we're going to treat this with respect and the people who aren't really. But if there's a celebrity and he's involved somehow, salaciously. If the general public sees a video of something awful that happened at Epstein's house, there's a timestamp on it. Everything that happens after that is. You should have known. And we, the general public, are not reasonable with that. Stupid, stupid. Then I'm getting a bunch of people saying, john, quit talking about wanting to be asleep. It's too hard. Kevin Falcone is out there. He said, I'm trying to do chest workouts. This is a bad day to do bench pressing because you're laying down so much. Just, you know what? Stop it. I've seen you, Kevin. You're fine for another day of looking that way.

[B]

You're down on the bench and close your eyes.

[C]

Just lay down on that bench. Keep the bar above you and just sleep it off. The folks at LA Fitness won't even notice. Just sleep, my friend. Sleep. It'll be fine. And then this guy says, everybody's talking about the rain and how it is I'm faking all my energy today is artificial, fake, contrived, nonsense. I would much rather be just laying down. Like Brady says, the smell of bacon or grilled cheese going, oh, that's why we used to do the rainy day recipes. Ladies, you shouldn't be out in this mess. Call your manager. Manager. Tell him you got some female problems, you get the day off. No man is ever going to. No follow up questions from any man will ever occur when you say, I've got some real troubling female issues today. All right? Enjoy the day off. No guy's going to be like, what is it? Then your next answer, if he's got the balls to ask, is, there's a heavy flow and a discharge. All right? Take the rest of the day. I don't wanna hear another word from you.

[A]

Matter of fact, take the rest of them.

[C]

You know what? You take all the time you need.

[A]

You don't think Trip's questioning any of the ladies downstairs?

[C]

If any of the ladies downstairs called. Trip. Hi, Trip. What's going on? Trip. Hi. It's chill.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

What's going on? Not gonna make it in today. Why? I'm having a late in life heavy fly. See you later. Never again. Talk to me. Don't ever look at me in the eyes ever again. Goodbye, late in life menstrual flow. No guys asking that. So, ladies, you do that and then you stay home, you make cookies or bacon or a grilled cheese and just make the whole house smell like grilled cheese. Sounds good, doesn't it?

[A]

Give Ranch House Grill down here and.

[C]

Bring us some Ranch House grilled.

[A]

Grilled cheese.

[C]

Maybe Brady can go over to McDonald's to his people and get us those special grilled cheeses that you'll love them. Yeah, I know.

[A]

Because I've never had one.

[C]

Yeah, from McDonald's. I just had one. Brady. Hey, Brady's right. It tasted a lot like Clinton's D. Okay. Because it was filled with E. Jack, don't get a special order grilled cheese. Go to a place that serves grilled cheese the best. I've done this before, but it's a rainy day. Grilled cheese day. November, rain, Guns N' Roses. Perfect day, nice weather, nice temperature. If you have time tonight, go to Beckett's table. It's the greatest grilled cheese sandwich combo with whatever that bisque is you dip it in, you could ever have. It's not even close. They give you four different little like, it's grilled, almost like sliders, only they're A little bigger. And in each grilled cheese is a different type of cheese, but all of them are amazing. And again, we talked about this last week. You slap some butter on some wonder bread, flap that around in one of those skillets, and then throw some Velveeta on it. I'm eating that, too.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

I got no problem with grilled cheese. I've gotten more emails and more people talking to me about how off brand it is that I don't mind Velveeta individually wrapped cheese. I didn't realize that you mean just.

[B]

Like, eating it straight up?

[C]

No. When I mentioned it the other day, I was like, you. Brett was all over me for that. Yeah. Everybody couldn't. I was shocked. Larry. Shocked. Larry even brought it up yesterday. People can't believe gotten emails from the Velveeta. And I'm like, I didn't realize how bougie everybody was about Velveeta cheese. It's fantastic. Now I don't like the government block. I don't even know if they still sell that. The one that's in the box. They used to take the cheese out and put baseball cards in. By the way, if you're a baseball card collector, the cheese box is perfect.

[B]

People up.

[C]

Perfect size for a collection.

[B]

You cube that up to make your queso.

[C]

I buy cubes. Better to sell the cubes. Why would I. Why would I do all that extra work? They said they sell cubed cheese. Just go buy the cubes. Why do I gotta take a big old hunk of government cheese? It just seems like. It seems like government poor cheese. It seems like gifted to you by socialism cheese. That's what I called it. That's. I'm gonna call that from now on socialism cheese. But the individually wrapped ones, forget it. That's delightful stuff. Yeah. And I brought it up here, and everybody was pointing and laughing at me. That I was.

[A]

I was shocked more than anything.

[C]

Why?

[A]

It's just because you. You're so picky with stuff. That's why I was all like, there is no way you're eating Vel.

[C]

And I will eat Kraft macaroni and cheese, too. I think that's ghetto delicious. Ghetto fabulous, they call it. It's delightful. You get that grilled cheese going today? Oh, Beckett's table. You're getting a free one out of me today. And this guy T says, unfortunately, some of us, John, work from home, so we can't use the weather as an excuse ever. All right?

[B]

That's the downside of staying home.

[C]

Knock it off. You go to sleep. You're at home. People who work from home are running the greatest grift on the planet. I get to work from home. You're sleeping till nine and you're keeping the phone on high. You're not. I just saw a thing the other day where a cop had to do a zoom call in a court hearing, and he just put his shirt on. I didn't realize there was a mirror behind him and his pants were off.

[B]

You're not wearing your pants.

[C]

Judge is like, are you not wearing pants? He goes, no, go put some pants on. It's like, all right, I'm working from home. Rico Blaze worked from home. You know what he did? Nobody.

[B]

He lifted the lens up.

[C]

Yeah, we're good. You guys don't need to know. It's just. There's no reflection.

[B]

A little low.

[C]

Let's go. We're good. Another guy had his thing on, and he took it into the bathroom and he left the camera on. He didn't realize it. And it was like, do you realize your camera's still on? You're. And he's like, look, I'm lactose intolerant or whatever. He said he's. Yeah, I take dumps, like, every eight minutes. You can still with it, you guys working from home, you know, I know people who work from home aren't like, they all. Because you all try to justify how much you're getting done. You know who doesn't do that? People at work. I never once go downstairs and go, hey, Kelly, what's going on? I'm working really hard. I don't know why I'm all day. I don't take any breaks. Okay, fine, but you talked to somebody. But, like, Jill, you work from home yesterday. Huh? And I did. I worked. I was working from eight to two. I had two meetings. I'm like, you didn't do anything. Stop it. Working from home's the biggest grift alive. So Mr. T, not Mr. T, but T is his name, said, I got out at 5 and walked a dog in the rain. Now. But we can't use weather as an excuse. When you work from home. Every day is a rainy day for you. Working from home. I don't want to hear it from home workers. You guys get up. I've seen it. You get up and sit down on the couch for 45 minutes and watch TV, and you make yourself some coffee, and you want to pet the dog. You hang out. You're at home. Every person that says, I work from home, ask them, go, what'd you do yesterday. Watch how mad they get because you. Because they got caught. Nobody who works from home is like, yeah, I didn't do much. They all are, like, justifying their whole. And it's the busiest day of their lives. It's that nobody works from home ever comes in and goes, I really had a light day yesterday. Oh, my God. I got up at seven. I had six meetings. I was. I worked till seven.

[A]

Does Jill do that?

[C]

Jill. Go down today to Jill and say. Because she has Tuesdays from home, and just say, how was yesterday at work? I worked hard. I'm like, okay, here we go. She knows we're onto it. It's genius.

[B]

She wrote him out.

[C]

And you know what else I know? Working from home's a scam. Because downstairs there's only like, two, maybe three people that are grandfathered in to get a day off and work from home. And the ones who don't have it are pissed off. And I'm like, I don't know. Sounds like it. When you talk to Jill in her days where she works from home, it's the hardest day of the week. Why would you want that? And then everybody else just rolls their eyes, like, you know why I want that? I want to sleep. I want to take naps. I want to not get yelled at. I don't want anything around.

[B]

They have the okay to be outside of the office to begin with.

[C]

Sales, biggest grift going. Jill told me that. She goes, well, I caught her once about two months ago. She said she was at the mall. I said, I thought you were working on Tuesday. I had my phone with me. That's not working. That's just in case someone at work catches you. Shut up. Huh? You're at the queues on silent. Yeah, I had a meeting at one and I had to meet a client, so I decided to do some returns. And you had a day off. I hate you so much, John. Like, don't hate me just for, you know, knowing your plan. It's not just Jill. I'm blaming Joel. It's not her.

[B]

There's anyone listening from Portland right now. Like, come on. This is what it is every day until February.

[C]

But that's why they're so weird. They're all sleepy and high all the time because this is their lives. So true. Somebody said, man, John, you said that the news doesn't hire ugly people, but they've hired some, quote, body positive broads I've seen. To hire newscasters is a lot like being a strip club owner. You gotta have some of that sometimes you gotta have a white one, a black one, a Mexican, a blonde, brunette, redhead, fat one, skinny one, and a short one. And you have to have a fat white crew.

[B]

Your ABC shift.

[C]

Yeah. Well, you have to have your fat white girl crew for, like, in case Mike Tyson's in town and he brings his crew in. You have to have your Mexican crew and you have to have a tall one. You have to have a short one with a fat ass. Ass news is no different. They got a blonde, they got a brunette.

[A]

The gay guy, too.

[C]

Oh, you got to have a. Well, not at the strip club.

[A]

Well, no, no, the news on the news.

[C]

Oh, sure, sure. Let's not get into that side of the. I'm just saying when it comes to the women, because nobody's going to watch the news if Ian Schwartz is in a white T shirt getting splashed. But if Holly Box out there and somebody brought up J. Michael Mike, well, that's true. Jamie Serretta on Channel 3. We all know when I say Jamie Serretta, men are like. Even women are like, those things are huge. She knows it and we know it. I know it's disparaging and it's. But there they are on my tv and you think I'm not supposed to see those. Then make the desk higher. Don't, you know, put her in a burlap sack or put her in a box like Captain pike from Star Trek and just have her head popping off. We're not supposed to notice those. Then don't show them to me. You put her. My friend Scott just text me. He goes, remember when Seretta got in the cold plunge? He goes, that was years ago. I remember it like it was yesterday. I do remember that she was in, like, a body glove suit and those things she's carrying around were noticeably huge.

[A]

And I wonder if I can find that.

[C]

You. Hi. I bet somebody's got it. You hire news people the same way you hire a strip club. It's a diversity. Yeah, the. The short Mexican girl with the fat ass and the tall Mexican girl have to be. It's almost Laurel and Hardy of Mexican strippers. They have to exist. They have to coexist as well. And maybe even in the rougher strip club, somebody with a couple of, like, stab marks or a scar that can't be explained. The black light kind of makes pop.

[B]

It's funny, you know, been here 30 plus years and it's the same thing. You hear guys talk sometimes on the news. Oh, she's not gonna last long.

[C]

She's going, of Course, yeah. You see him like, wow, that one's. She's gonna be a superstar.

[B]

She'll be out of this market very soon.

[C]

This is a stepping stone. And then you get the ones that do weekends for like eight or nine years in a row and they start mentioning it on the air. I'm still doing weekends. Like, yep, shouldn't have gotten pregnant probably, huh? It's bad for your career. I'm sure you're happy with your kids and stuff, but that's why you wake up at 3:30 on Saturday. Stinks. But yeah, that's. That's it. Yeah, don't defend your working from home nonsense either. This guy even just texted and he goes, serretta on Camelback. I remember she was doing a story on Camelback and then once she did a balloon ride and her jugs were in the air and it started to rain a little bit. I'm like, oh, I can fix the news. You're gonna hire all those hot girls on rainy days. All you gotta do is get them out there. You have to have the old stripper every once in a while. You have to make it seem like you're not age restricted. We've all been to strip clubs. The strip club guy has to have something for everybody. Body positivity. There's always a guy out there going these highly back too skinny. And you have to have that thick weather girl. It's not fat. She's just got enough on her to make people like me go, She's a little big, but people like Lamont go. That's exactly the type of weather I'm looking for.

[B]

Controlled expectations at lunchtime.

[C]

What do you mean? Oh, for strippers. Yeah, well, the, the midday news is usually not as sexy, so it's the same thing as a strip club. The channel 3 12, 5 15, they're all strip clubs. They're just strip clubs with information. And the DJ is like John Hook. And now let's throw it over to someone called Michaela. She's standing live on the corner like, that's the strip club.

[A]

Get those dollar bills ready.

[C]

Here's something that I have.

[A]

Comic Con.

[C]

I've been paying attention to this and I find it hysterical. First off, if you ever Google search hotels in Rwanda, you're gonna get slapped in the face with what happened to the Tutsis and the Christians that got murdered. It was a bloodbath, genocide nightmare in Rwanda. Watching the Clippers play basketball on their jerseys. There's advertisements. Now everybody's got something. And the Clippers advertisement this year Says Visit Rwanda. And I want to know if anybody has done that. Is this advertising campaign working at all? First off, I checked it out. Don't Google hotels in Rwanda. There's pictures of dead people everywhere. The slaughter was horrifying. Being a member of the Chamber of Commerce in Rwanda, which, by the way, for those who don't know, little south of Uganda, right in the middle of Africa, guerrillas are their big thing.

[B]

Hell of a pitch, that advertising firm.

[C]

And the Clippers. Steve Ballmer owns the Clippers. He gets it. Like, that dude kind of understands stuff. Visit Rwanda is the hardest thing in the world. Even like Travelocity is like, are you sure hotels in Rwanda you know about the genocide, right? And the murders of Slaughter Rwanda is not. So Visit Rwanda's on the shirts of the Clippers. I understand Rwanda's trying to rewind, do that whole 1994 terrifying slaughter that their country's most known for. And then Don Cheadle ruined it by making an amazing movie called Hotel Rwanda. So the search for a Rwandan hotel is tough. Five star Rwandan hotel. You still get the Wikipedia story of Hotel Rwanda, which was a nice hotel in Rwanda. And basically all there is to do in Rwanda is get into a truck at night and drive around and look for gorillas. And that's real. That's what you do there. And I'm not a huge fan that.

[A]

How has Susan not recruited these people that sold that?

[C]

If Visit Rwanda is going on Clipper jerseys.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Certainly they'll buy time on KUPD.

[B]

12,500 is the starting. It's for price for the luxury.

[C]

The big. Well, you gotta find. Yeah, but that's what they do. They put you in a resort and then you find gorillas also. Let's never talk about what happened here. This is what our country. When I say Rwanda, what's your first thought? Oh, yeah, that Don Cheadle movie where everybody got slaughtered and he tried to save a bunch of folks. It's basically Schindler's List he tried to save. It was like a bunch of priests and they had a religious battle and they were trying to wipe them all out. This was in the 90s. This was not like 1805. This was 25 years ago. Then they made that movie. And now the Clippers have Visit Rwanda. I have to know because I do this with endorsements and stuff. I get like, you know, Doug Hopkins, we talked last night. He goes, man, I still get tons of leads for me, I'm like, that's great. Do you think [e-mail] is like this clippers thing is gangbusters, people. We're booking flights like crazy. Nobody's booked a flight based on that. No one. It's a 19 hour trip to go to Rwanda and hope it doesn't happen to you. That's all I'd be thinking about. Don't watch that movie. It is not. It's too soon. Still. It would have been like in the 60s if Germany did a. You know, come see Berlin. It's totally different now. You'd be like, I don't know, you're kind of known for that. It's all. It's all rebuilt and we got the smoky smell out of the air. All the curtains have been dry cleaned.

[B]

It's where my nephew is.

[C]

He's in Germany right now. Well, right now it's fine. He's not in Rwanda.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Which is. You don't want to go there. You got to give him like 50 years before you can trust him again.

[A]

I'm not.

[C]

Rwanda had a full outlet, like, surprise, genocide. The thing. They were. They were inviting these priests into places saying, we're going to have meetings. And then they'd burn the buildings and lock them inside. Just slaughtering people. The movie's horrific, and it's called Hotel Rwanda. So in order to go there, you got to eventually read that story. And that is not. There are not. I can't tell you how many gorillas it would take for me to say, okay, it's worth going to Rwanda. It's not a destination for anyone. And then you look on a map at where Rwanda is and you're like, I'm going San Diego. There's no way I'm going all the way over there. Just in case you got the Congo, Uganda. No, thanks. I better go with Don Cheadle because he's like a hero over there. Because they think he's the real guy. He's not. I don't even know if he. I don't even know the real guy lived. That movie's so depressing. Nick Nolte's in it and he's dropping N bombs and there's. Yeah, he's got like Nazi stuff. Visit Rwanda is not going to. But again, you're right. How is Susan not.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

If they're advertising for Rwanda, they should be a heavy blanket across the entire nation. Just trying to. We would like people to know the real Rwanda. Yeah, yeah. The not slaughter one, Right? Yes. What else are you known for? We have gorillas. Let me ask you something real quick. There. They got the gorillas in other parts of Africa. Oh, yes. Africa is filled with them. Why would I go to the place most known for a genocide when I could go to the other one? I'm not. I'm not going to Uganda because of IDI Amin. That. That city was going along just fine until Ubudu's men decided to start a coup out of the blue. Too many coups. I like to go to coup free places. When's the last coup you had? Is a good question for your travel agent. If they're trying to sell you in Rwanda. Oh, they had a coup like 25 years ago. And has that settled down? All right, I'm not going there. No coups, no genocides, and, you know, no recent deaths by gorilla in the street. Those are pretty much deal breakers. Because I can go up to Half Moon Bay, they've got a zoo, go see a gorilla. San Diego's great. Just go over to watch that wild animal park. And it's almost like being in Rwanda without all the actual genocide. There's just more Mexicans. That's the only difference. That wild animal park feels like you're taken off into some other place. It's great. The only thing I wish they did was take the fences down. So occasionally you could see a. A real life feeding. Like the zebras just minding their own business and a lion comes up and takes care of them. That would make that park legitimate. They'll never do that. Scares the kids.

[B]

And if you do the San Diego Zoo thing and you want to dabble in some danger, you know, go across the border, Tijuana.

[C]

Sure. You'll see a zebra.

[B]

There's potential to disappear.

[C]

You'll see a zebra.

[B]

Yeah. You'll see a zebra. Take some pictures with it.

[C]

Actually a donkey with some paint on it. You're not going to see that in any other nation. And actually people smiling and nobody trying to stop it. Yeah. You want some adventure? I'm not going to Mexico. You think I'm going to Rwanda because the Clippers said so?

[B]

Which one first?

[C]

The Clippers. The Clippers paid Bradley Beal five more years. The Suns are paying Bradley Beal for four years to not play here. The Clippers make bad choices. The last thing I'm going to do is take their advice on vacations.

[A]

What if Mike Tomlin was a spokesman?

[C]

We're going to Rwanda. I figured he would speak to the entire nation. He would straighten up whatever's going on. If there was a coup questions, he'd grab a microphone. Good afternoon. We have a We have some bumps and bruises associated with coups.

[A]

Questions?

[C]

Mike, what do you think about the coup? All in all, I'm not in favor of coups. You know, he makes a lot of sense this. We were here for a gorilla adventure and there was a coup. We go day to day here. Next. Man up. We lost seven people in the coup. Still doing the guerrilla adventure. Questions? Aaron Rodgers, your safari guy, I thought, that's awesome. I do that. If the Steelers had visit Rwanda on their jerseys, I would have some questions. And I'm. I'm just wondering how bad things are that Rwanda is your title sponsor. Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's Morning Sickness. You know how many, like, Miami visit Miami? Okay, I get that. That. But you can't do that in la. Why Rwanda? Visit Vancouver. Like, pick a city we want to go to. Not a nation that's known for coups.

[A]

Cardinals going to visit Maryvale on theirs or something.

[C]

Yeah, it's the same thing. Except for Maryvale is safer than Rwanda. Think of that. Challenge accepted.

[A]

Maryville's just like.

[C]

Oh, really? It's. It's this Google search right now. Five star hotels in Maryvale ain't getting anything. You go to Rwanda and they try to like, who started a resort in Rwanda after that movie? You just move away. The decency to change the name. The Congo's changed its name like nine times. After every coup, they have a new name. How many times you've looked at a map of Africa that's like 10 or 15 years old, and there's like seven or eight countries that aren't there anymore because they changed their name after the thing that. That place is moving around like it's, you know, a puzzle. We are not called that anymore. Why? Too many people died. We changed the name. Oh, still cooing maybe. Janny's always talking to me about that. You need to come to me Sudan with me, John, and see it for yourself. No. Why not? You don't want to hear my answer. Too many brothers. You are an idiot. No, I'm just kidding. I'm not going over there. You guys kill each other like crazy. It's not been a coup in months. Did you.

[B]

Oh, you.

[C]

Did you hear that? It's too soon. Jenny goes there. I get a email from him talking about how awesome everything is. Comes back, I have lunch with him, talks to me about how amazing it is next time I see him. Two weeks later, by the way, my whole village was ravaged. What happened?

[B]

Coup.

[C]

Ah. The North Sudanese sent in Some people, they are Muslim nation. We want our freedom. I'm 14 days removed from there. Did you lose any family? Yes. Like huh? Same village you stayed in? Yes. What about the hotel I would have been in? Burnt to the ground. Okay. I'm never visiting your karate country. There's a reason you left. I left because I had to. You might consider that the luckiest day of your life.

[B]

You want to go in certain months because that's coup season.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

It's like hurricanes. They even predict them. Got a coup developing just off the coast.

[B]

It's changed directions.

[C]

Yeah. Rwanda is generally cons. Look, I don't even like that word. Says Rwanda is generally considered safe for American tourists. I don't want an adverb in there. Just say Rwanda is safe or not. Not known for its stability and low crime rates. Major tourist areas like Kigali national parks. However, the U.S. department of State has a level two exercise increased caution advisory for the country due to potential armed violence.

[B]

Not bad. Level two.

[C]

It's not level one where I want it to be.

[B]

How many levels are there?

[C]

One is all I need. The super safe one. The one where I don't even check levels of concern. Even when I go to Albuquerque, I'm like, let's take a look at the Department of. The U.S. state Department's level of exercise caution. It's a little increased. It's a level two. I'm not going. Thanks, Clippers, but no thanks. Here's another thing on the list of things to concern yourself with Rwanda. And it's kind of thrown in there. Malaria is a risk. Tap water's not safe to drink. Only consume boiled water. No.

[B]

You'll probably need numerous shots.

[C]

Of course you do.

[A]

Just go to Rocky Point. It's closer.

[C]

Exactly. Can't drink the water there either. Comprehensive travel insurance. Includes medical evacuations. Clippers. Take that off your jersey. Nobody's going to Rwanda.

[B]

They got a lot of choppers over there.

[C]

There's some guy. You're telling me there's some guy on a plane right now going. Where you headed? Oh, we're off to Rwanda. We gotta stop over in D.C. oh, yeah. Why are you going to Rwanda? Because Chris Paul wears it on his jersey.

[B]

My friend's getting married. Yeah.

[C]

We get a big party. It's a bachelor party in Rwanda. No kidding. What gave you the idea? The Clippers, you know, the Clippers are known for an entire lifetime of existence of terrible choices. Yep. I'm gonna do what the Clippers say. Not happening. Visit Rwanda. You gotta. You gotta set a balls on you, Clippers. Bradley Beal was there. If it wasn't for the Clippers signing Bradley Beal, the Suns would be the Clippers of the NBA making dumb decision after dumb decision. I want to meet somebody that said I'm thank God for that. Clippers advertisement because I'd have never visited Rwanda otherwise. And it has got to be the toughest job in the world other than Somalia or maybe Pakistan. What do you do on the Chamber of Commerce for Islamabad? Oh yeah. What are you trying? We're trying to boost tourism. Good luck with that. Is there a Chamber of Commerce in Maryvale or do they just shut that down?

[A]

I don't know. Well, I did look up five star hotels in Maryville. There's no official five stars.

[C]

Google said, hahaha, what's the highest rated?

[A]

But it doesn't say. It says, but there are some that are close. Royal Palms.

[B]

That's not.

[C]

Which is not close at all.

[A]

Hyatt Regency Phoenix and Arizona Grand. I know.

[C]

Arizona Grand's closer to Guadalupe.

[A]

Yeah. Hilton Tapatillo Cliffs.

[C]

Way far away.

[A]

I know. Maryville Chamber of Commerce.

[C]

Basically the Maryvale Chair Chamber of Commerce even sends you to places 30 miles from Maryland. Maryvale. You should probably stay over here at the Royal Palms. Oh yeah.

[A]

Oh they do have one.

[C]

They have a hotel?

[A]

No, they have a Chamber of Commerce.

[B]

Are you guys okay if we say it's in Maryville? I know it's in Phoenix.

[C]

Toughest job ever. Maryvale Chamber of Commerce, at least in Phoenix. Who's the leader of that? Let's give that person some serious credit. And also they work from home and they're sleeping. Well, everybody in Maryville is asleep right now. But I'm. They're sleeping until at least noon every day and every Monday when they have that meeting. How's it looking over at the Chamber of Commerce? We got an uptick in tourists yet. Come on. Next. Next order of business.

[A]

Not who I was expecting to be in the Maryville Chamber.

[C]

A guy named Jared. He's the vice president. The president is Tyler. It's a group of Mormons running Maryville.

[A]

They don't live in Maryville.

[C]

They do not live there.

[A]

No way. Absolutely none of them.

[C]

None of them. Look at this bald white guy. This looks like a group of people at like a country club that didn't allow Jews for years.

[B]

Years.

[A]

These are the ones couldn't get it in Gilbert. So yeah, we'll just go to Maryville.

[C]

We got this. They'll vote for us. They'll think we're going to try to.

[A]

Change maybe this one, but that's about it.

[C]

They're trying to convince people to head over to Maryvale. Good luck, guys.

[B]

A lot of time in the spring.

[C]

Training for the Brewers. They have the worst team in the whole lot. It's almost like Milwaukee's here. Yeah. Yeah. Maryville's got no time. There's no reason to go in there. We had the greatest weekend in Maryvale. Said no one ever.

[B]

Business of the month.

[C]

Kawasaki. Well, they get good.

[B]

Belongs to the president of the Chamber of Commerce.

[A]

Vice president. Yeah, right there.

[C]

So he named his own business the Best Thing in Maryville. I'm pretty good. I'm Maryville's man of the Year also, by the way I named myself that. I feel for those people. That's a tough gig. Guadalupe had a Chamber of Commerce. Remember, you'd leave and you go out. Carmen, when we'd leave there, and you'd look across the street, and they built that building. It was a pretty building. It was the Chamber of Commerce. Yeah.

[B]

They finally got a.

[C]

You know what you need, though?

[B]

The newer one.

[C]

Yeah, it's nice. Nice building. But you need Commerce to have a chamber that oversees that. What in the world is Gilbert trying to. Or Guadalupe trying to do to get you there? We need to draw people in. We need to sell more tires. We need a new yantara shop, or at least a sign.

[B]

They tried those festivals every now and then.

[C]

Yeah. Every once in a while, they'd have a. A dry fish. Jalisco Nightos de la Playa. Is that a. You're just throwing words at me.

[B]

Come for the fish, leave with some ribs.

[C]

Come for the fish, stay for the disenter. And it's free dog night. Okay. Every day in Guadalupe is free dog night. Just open your door. They get in.

[A]

I think our old building was the only tourist trap in that. You know, I mean.

[C]

Well, they had Christie's.

[A]

Oh, that's right. Yeah.

[C]

They were smart enough to actually go to the cities and say, we want to annex a little. They gave up the US And Christie's.

[B]

The revenue.

[C]

Yeah. And they gave up that hotel. Remember they had that Best Western or whatever that was right there, and they gave that up to get the Christie's. So if you looked at Guadalupe's map, it changed to just kind of jut out. Out where Christie's is because they wanted the revenue from Christie's. So it was KUPD and Christie's. I don't know how it's still a city. I don't know what they're that tow yard where our building used to be can't be pulling in that kind of cake. Maybe. But. Yeah, good luck. But I'd still rather go to Maryvale for a weekend than Rwanda. It's close, but I can drive out to Christie's zoo and do that feed gorillas pumpkins thing Brady does. Does and, like, get close enough to think that's something. Do they have gorillas there at that zoo? They don't have gorillas out at that zoo, no. Oh, I have to go to the other zoo.

[B]

They got a lot of monkeys.

[C]

Eh, close enough. You know, somebody in Rwanda told me, that's a gorilla. It's just really small. And he was lying. I wouldn't know. What am I, Jane Goodall? I don't know. Let's go over to the zoo today, put a park on, stare at the things. And it's raining, so it's gorillas in the mist. You can play pretend you're in Rwanda or something. Visit Rwanda. A lot of nerve. And then I started my whole day with a lady on the news talking about how her body's messed up and she couldn't figure out how. She didn't realize for years that sweat wasn't white.

[B]

Oh, boy.

[C]

She finally went to the doctor to say, what's going on here? Doctor's like, that's milk.

[B]

Milk.

[C]

She sweats milk. Oh.

[A]

I was thinking it was something else.

[C]

Your husband's sweating on you in your sleep from a very specific area. Wouldn't that be great, though, if it turned out the husband was just pouring milk in her armpits at night. She thinks she sweats milk. She went to the doctor, and turns out she's got a double boobs. She has a boob growing under her boobs. It's kind of leaked back into her armpit, but there's no nipple. But it got stuck into her sweat glands, and her sweat glands now just ooze this white milk. And the doctors looked at it and like, this isn't normal at all. And then could you imagine the smell on a hot day if she's in Phoenix? And this like, geez, my deodorant's not working. I smell like sour dairy. Like, that bitch stinks. She sweats milk. They found it. They scraped her. Get that, you know, on the top of the milk carton has that crust on it that was her armpits. Every day, he did a little, like, paint scrape, and they took the crusties and they put it in a cup and they put it under a microscope. And this is Sweating milk. And then they gave a closer look. And, like, you've got a second boob under each boob that has a duct that's going through, and it's tied to your sweat. It's confused. Your whole body's confused. And they call it overlapping breast on the noose. Which means her boobs covered up other boobs.

[A]

I never heard of that. I mean, I've heard of double butt. I've seen that in Vegas.

[C]

Well, there's double butt and double. You have the. Well, the double bubble on a breast implant is when you get the implants put in and they sit on top of the old boobs, and it makes kind of like a stacked pyramid. Like, you can see it didn't. It's not the same circumference. There's a second boob under your boob. Double bubbles are bad. You see them in porn a lot. When girls bend over and you're like, oh, that's where her real boobs are. Are. And the fake boobs are right. That they're not connecting. But if you're sweating milk, if you're sweating white.

[B]

Check it out.

[C]

Go see the doctor. I didn't see. I didn't see far enough into it. Whether or not she'd recently had a kid and she just started lactating out of her armpits and stuff, but that she was like. Couldn't figure it out and goes to the doctor. Like, I got this crust growing under my arms, and they said it was getting into her hair follicles and coming out through that. I can't imagine the smell of. In Phoenix, Arizona, of milk sweat. Just pour milk. Even like, after it stops raining in a couple days when it's 70, pour milk on your counter and let it sit there. And then go back in about an hour and just give it a whiff.

[B]

So our armpits, look, they are flocked.

[C]

Yeah. Every day, like dandruff. Only the worst case ever. Anybody else hot? Oh, I'm like a dairy cow over here.

[B]

No need to raise your hand if you have a question.

[C]

And while she's, like. While you're. While she's doing any. She's exerting anything. Just squirting out milk. I'm gonna leave you for a second, Brady. You have a nice time over there talking about yourself. Would you taste it?

[A]

Wait a minute. It straight out of the tap or.

[C]

After it's been sitting there for a while, Curdled milk. You're in the throes of passion with the milkmaid. Okay. And you look down and you start to notice that she's producing.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, I'll give it a shot.

[C]

I would too.

[A]

Yeah, yeah, but like you're saying armpit. Yeah.

[C]

No, yeah, we knew. We knew that already. That's why I told you to go do your own thing first.

[A]

I thought you were talking about the dried up, like summertime. Then I'm out.

[C]

And the heat of passion. I'm in up heat of passion. You see, she's like, yeah.

[A]

Oh yeah.

[C]

I'm gonna give that a taste.

[A]

Four cans. Okay.

[C]

Oh, her second boobs are starting to shoot. I'm going in. I did that.

[B]

Only if it was.

[A]

I did that.

[C]

I did that. I made you sweat milk. It's like sugar pops. I've never sweat so much milk in my life. Life. You're the only one.

[A]

You're welcome.

[C]

You're welcome.

[B]

Have you dated sugar pops?

[C]

Yeah, just pour. You know, it'd be kind of fun. I'm gonna see you, Brady. You take some cereal and you pour it in there and get ready. And then when she lifts her armpits up, you just crush those. Yeah, I knew it.

[B]

It's soggy enough.

[A]

He's back in.

[C]

Well, you really have to do some work. I mean, I don't know your system, but I pretty much think you get it over with. With. I don't know if you're going to get a full soggy fruity pebble situation going on. Her armpits like you probably. Sorry. God. And then you roll over and go to sleep.

[A]

Soggy Shredded Wheat.

[C]

Yeah, it's got half of its sugary and half of it frosted. And now I want to do it. Anyway, thanks news for that story this morning. I laughed. And she goes on tv, Sweat and milk. She's in Kentucky or something. Doctor couldn't figure it out. And then they took a look inside and I got boobs leaking into my armpits.

[B]

Right. If we do a story on this.

[C]

Yeah, I'm gonna call the news. Do you mind if I call the news about your milk armpits?

[B]

No. Why would I care?

[C]

Most people think it's gross, but okay. And they did. And then now she's on the. Sitting there staring at that this morning just like, what the hell?

[A]

Troy Hayden needs to get on this. I mean, he needs.

[C]

Troy Hayden needs to interview her. And then like at a gym. Make her do it. Yeah, yeah. Put her on a treadmill and go.

[A]

We're waiting.

[C]

And then Hayden takes a glass. She lifts her arm up right into the glass. Hayden takes a sip Back to you, Mark Curtis. He's doing shots. Do a milkshot. That's interesting. And then he takes his finger and he scrubs some off and kind of shakes it into the glass.

[B]

Is the restaurant scraper.

[C]

Yeah, that's. I wish I was making this up. Which is why I believe the simulation is broken. I like Brady's ideas of the Bible. Anybody sweats milk out their armpits, they're either canonized or killed. But either way, they're getting. We're done with them.

[B]

She fed 5,000.

[C]

She sweats the milk. She is Guadalupe's greatest dream. Come suckle at my armpits, Sister Leche. That would be. She'd be the patron saint of lech. Leche. Armpit leche. He comes from a special spot. The Lord has blessed our armpits with the gift of life. See? All right. What are you guys doing over here? We're eating at the armpit of the heavenly one, ladies. Armpit sweats milk. And you don't see it as a medical anomaly? You're saying God did this?

[A]

Okay, Christian said. Guys, people are effing eating right now.

[C]

Yeah, I know. Out of an armpit, some soggy Fruity Pebbles.

[B]

Some cereal.

[C]

I go with the soggy cereals that don't do well in milk because be like a one bite. It wouldn't have to fight for a sugar pop. Fruity Pebbles would be the best one. Oops. All berries would be the worst because they're like, impervious to milk. They fight the milk. You can keep those in mouth sores and they stay dry. Nuts. Yeah, it's like eating dirt, clots, Grape Nuts. What am I, 90?

[B]

You gotta wait 30 minutes at least.

[C]

Wait 30 minutes on grape Nuts?

[B]

Yeah, a lot of the age.

[C]

Why do you even own Grape Nuts?

[B]

Nuts.

[C]

Grape Nuts are disgusting, by the way. Grapes don't have nuts. I don't know what a grape nut is. Their shape. Just shut up and eat them out of that lady's armpits. What is her. What do her knees do?

[B]

Oh, the backs of the knees.

[C]

Yeah, I can tell you that story. I knew a girl, Tony Romas, back in the day, who sweat really hard out of her knees when you. You know, we're down south from the knees.

[A]

She.

[C]

Our knees would drip sweet wet. She wasn't fat or anything. But you go down like that was how you know you were winning down there. She didn't tell you she was having the big O. Yeah, but her knees did because they were over your shoulders and they were sliding around like you Were a big surf all of your arms, like, jesus, he's soaking my arms. And then we also found out that it was an erogenous zone. So you could slip one in between her calf and side. She would go crazy. She was nuts. So maybe she had something wrong with her. Because, I mean, her knees lubricated to the point where it was dripping. It wasn't a pig. You'd think it was a pig.

[A]

People are calling out what cereals now?

[C]

Oh, everybody's gonna have their favorite.

[A]

Cinnamon Toast Crunch. I'm in, John.

[C]

Whatever. Oh, Cinnamon Toast Crunch out of that lady's armpits. I'd do it if she didn't even leak milk. That stuff would be good in sweat.

[B]

Booberry.

[C]

Booberry's a little childish, Brady. You don't go for those.

[A]

Cookie Crisp would be the worst.

[C]

They're saying you can't have the cartoon mascot in your head while you're doing this.

[A]

It has to be down there.

[C]

I know Fruity Pebbles is a stretch, but they don't. It's the Flintstones, so it's kind of human. Yeah. You can't have Follow my nose. It always knows flavors of fruit. Just bury a snoot in this bitch's armpit. She sweats me milk. Anyway, Brett, what do you got on the big board of musical treats? We start this gloriously strange day.

[A]

Wake up song brought to you by Action Ride Shop and watching the weather. They're getting snow up north right now, so now's the time to hit up Action Ride Shop. Get those skis, get the boards you can rent, you can buy. They got everything for you. They're gonna get you up north there. And taking advantage of the weather at the old OG location right there on Gilbert Road and Southern. And if you need to get that bike tuned up, it's a little soggy out there right now. Both locations will take care of you, including the brand new one right there at Power Road. And I'm afraid to ask. And McDowell Action rideshop.com said, Just for.

[C]

Fun, I searched Rwandan news today. Ron did. He said, here's the headline. It says in quotes, it would have better. It would have been better had they killed me. Headline, Horrifying accounts of women among thousands as young as eight raped by soldiers. Visit Rwanda today. Thanks, Clippers. Idiots. Cocoa Krispies. Make that armpit milk. Chocolate milk.

[A]

Not bad. I'm still down with the Cinnamon Toast Crunch, though.

[C]

Nick said, I don't think you're thinking about this. I have a feeling that sweat is not pure milk. It Would look like drywall mud.

[A]

Well, in the summertime, it would wood that gray paste.

[C]

Oh, my God. So send her jogging. She turns up that milk. She runs long enough, you get some free butter. That's true. She can turn her own. It's a good idea. All right, what do you got on the list?

[A]

Coffin cats, Scars on Broadway, Slayer at dawn, they sleep. From our conversation earlier today, Sleepy Wednesday, the cult rain, Anthrax, Indians for Mary Kim. Let's see. Yeah.

[C]

Nine Inch Nails.

[A]

Piggy for Trump. Oh, I like Garbage seven Dust. You knew GNR would be in there. Iron Maiden, Allison chains, Ramstein and Avenge 7 pull.

[C]

Let's do piggy by nine inch nails. All right, That's a good one. I like that. I. I'm getting a ton of AI memes of Donald Trump based on the idea that he may or may not have blown Clinton at least. That's kind of fun to think. Even though they say it's now a horse, and that doesn't make it better. But one of my favorites is the AI, Monica Lewinsky and Donald are in bed together, talking, but it's not sexual. They're like a slumber party, and they're laying on their tummies with their legs up in the air in the back, and Donald says, hey, Monica, what did Bill taste like to you? And Monica goes, oh, my God. On the count of three, we'll say it together. Together. Then they go, 1, 2, 3. Gas station sushi. And then they giggle and they start to pillow fight like, AI is my future. It's the greatest thing ever. I hate that. I hope that's true, but I really hope that's true. Milk. All right, let's. You got Piggy? Yeah, I got it. Okay, I gotta check this one. Is this bad?

[A]

It doesn't have explicit on the thing.

[C]

Here, so it could just be so explicit they don't even say it. Let me see Piggy lyrics. Never put that in a computer before.

[B]

You'll just get the transcription from the interview questions from the report.

[C]

It could be. Yeah, I think it looks good. All right, let's do it. Piggy by Nine Inch Nails for that reporter that Donald Trump called piggy. It's out of control now. 98. This morning sickness radiate. There you go. It's falling in reverse. Its voice is in my head. Another one that visually, we're just talking about that off here. You can like song, not like song, love song, hate song. You can't beat Google in that one. Put it on YouTube and watch the video. They put Together. Falling in Reverse does some stuff that's just outrageous. That dude's girlfriend is the wrestler, right? That. I'm not sure. You come in here. I think that was the guy from Falling in Reverse that she's.

[A]

I remember we had.

[C]

Yeah, the hot wrestler that came in, and she was pretty sure that's who it was. The visuals on their stuff is unmatched. Before we get to the Brady report, TJ said, john, I just caught the tail end of you talking about grilled cheese. Where was the place? It's. I'm telling you, Beckett's table. It's you. Here's the thing. I'll say it from my experience. It's the best grilled cheese you can get. And on a day like today, which is grilled cheese day, look outside, Tell me a grilled cheese waiting for you wouldn't be awesome right now. I'm sorry. Lactose intolerant, people. It's not my fault God hates you. You're missing out on the grilled cheese. I would be like, I would take two days of wretched tummy aches and poops just to taste grilled cheese. But Beckett's table has a great one. One you may know of a better one. I'm not in it to argue. I'm just saying it's a really good one. You're not going to be disappointed at Beckett's tables. Grilled cheese. This guy says, I just caught the tail end of you talking grilled cheese. I normally wouldn't message about food at the risk of sounding like Brady, but the chef show on Netflix shows in detail how to make a five cheese grilled cheese. The wife and I make it on sourdough and it will change you. Grilled cheese is one of those things where we all turn into Brady. It's a knee buckling food when it's right. Nothing better than the dirty ass grilled cheese sandwich.

[A]

Talking about it I want now.

[C]

Oh, you can't help it. Look outside right now and tell me like, hey, Brett, you want a grilled cheese? Like, just the skies says grilled cheese. So good. Oh, evidently the guy from Falling in Reverse and that wrestler have broken up.

[A]

Oh, okay.

[C]

Just recently. Thank you, Swiftbert. He's all things falling in reverse drama. And he goes on Reddit pages, talks about their life. Tough life. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report, which is brought to you by our [e-mail] Now, I know on a day like this, you're like, what do I need shade for? You know better. This is rare. So you get your shady awnings, you get all your stuff up and a day like this, they'll be sucked up. You won't even notice them against your house. That's what they do at all. Pro shade. They make it part of your house, not just something stuck to your house. And you see some of those people that put those awnings or those sales or something like that, that just looks funny. And all they're seeking out is a little shade in a place like around the pool or something like that. Think about it now. All the places in the summer you can't walk because it'll burn your feet or you can't sit because the sun just pounds on you. All pro shade can get that done now. Have you ready for those Sunny, sunny days. AllProchade.com when you get a motorized shade right now, you're gonna get yourself a heater thrown in there for nothing so you can enjoy the outdoors on a cool day like this under the beauty of an all pro shade shade awning or blind. Keep it together. Get it now. Allproche.com Brady reported.

[B]

Good Wednesday morning to you, Phoenix. Hello, world.

[C]

Hi.

[B]

Happy National. Have a bad day day.

[C]

Have a bad day day.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Like intentionally. Yeah, I can't. Grilled cheese son a nap. It's already started.

[B]

Pretty strong.

[C]

You give me a blanket right now, I'd lay on the sidewalk. It's just one of those.

[B]

And it's world toilet day.

[C]

Yeah. I still got to get on mine. Not on the toilet. I gotta buy. I gotta buy that I'm still on the mix for my awesome super Japanese toilet.

[A]

In fact, that was done.

[C]

No, it is. I just have to get an electrician to come rearrange my. I have a guy. So don't. All of you. I'm sure. All of you. Showtime. Shade. Kevin Falcone wants to start calling him the SS and I had to give him a history lesson. But I have to reverse my electric from one one side of the room to the other to make this thing go because it takes up a ton of juice. It's not just a plug in. It's like a full on thing of its own.

[B]

I sent you that picture, the one I used.

[C]

Oh, yeah. At that guy's house. Yeah. Oh, it's a different. Did you take a dump at his house though? Or you just. Did you wash up?

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[C]

Oh, yeah. You got to use the wand. It is life changing. And it got lights on the Bottom and it lights up and it plays music and it talks to you and it's got information. It's got the Internet. I got this thing on order. I just have to finish the deal. I'll do that. That's my rainy day project. That and windshield wipers. Because I am an absolute road hazard right now. And a grilled cheese.

[B]

A couple of basis fun facts. The original cast of Jackass included a female cast member named Stephanie Hodge.

[C]

Yeah, she was on there a couple times.

[B]

She was brutally injured during a stunt left the group. She broke her back and pelvis and was nearly paralyzed.

[C]

Wasn't she in one of the movies? She didn't do anything but she hung around.

[A]

Yeah.

[B]

Only five U.S. presidents have had beards. And all five were Republican.

[C]

Garfield, Lincoln. What the hell? Arthur?

[B]

No sir.

[C]

He had huge sideburns. That doesn't count as a beard. Nope. All right. Was he president? Maybe he never was president. Buchanan?

[B]

No.

[C]

Oh man, I'm lost now. All right, go.

[B]

Ulyses, Grant.

[C]

Damn it.

[B]

Rutherford B. Hayes.

[C]

All in that same time frame between the 70s and 90s of the 1800s.

[B]

Old Benny Harrison.

[C]

They call them. I think they're. I think they're called the forgotten five. The presidents after Lincoln up until about 1895. There's a bunch of them in there. They just don't even know.

[B]

You're at least 104 times more likely to choke to death than to die from being struck by lightning.

[C]

Well, because you eat every day. That makes sense. They're supposed to eat every day. Some of those college girls don't. And good on them keeping it together. Keep it tight, sister.

[B]

This is a little follow up story from about a couple weeks ago. Do you remember the guy was bought a house in France and was in the backyard digging a hole and discovers some gold.

[C]

Oh yeah.

[B]

Gold bars and some coins. The gold bars and it was. Everything was estimated to be about $800,000 plus. Well, the police found out where the gold bars were made.

[C]

They did.

[B]

They are made 20 years ago and they said they got a hold the loot and give it time.

[C]

Found the owner.

[B]

Yeah. And if the owners have passed away and there's no heir, the treasure would go to the state.

[C]

Again. You find gold, you go third world on that. You do not report it. If I find tons of gold, my. But what if it's stolen? So what? I was digging a pool and I found gold. I'm keeping that.

[B]

Well, the couple from England which was earlier this year had found some coins from like I forget which king, but they're about 700 years old.

[C]

Old.

[B]

They sold it for like 20 coins. 416, 000 they got to keep.

[C]

First call I make is Brett. What do I do? What do you got? I found 800 grand worth of gold bars digging a hole in my yard. I'll be over in a minute. The state ain't getting it. I'll tell you that. They don't even pay taxes off regular job spreads people, let alone found gold. And I guarantee you I'm not going to get 800 grand out of that.

[A]

No.

[C]

But I might get four. Oh yeah. And that's a pretty nice cut.

[B]

Cut.

[C]

And I don't have to deal with anything. And I'll put it on you guys. We'll launder the hell out of that gold. Give me a shovel. Brett and I are going searching. Is that true of the lost Dutchman? All those old people that die every year in the summer when they go out and look for the lost Dutchman's gold, they find it. Doesn't it belong to someone? Technically. So the state will get it. It's basically probate. This is a great commercial for Trajan wealth.

[B]

If you don't have your should announce it that way.

[C]

These pricks, these government pricks will steal all your money if you don't have it buttoned up with legal stuff. If you find gold, they get it it. Why? Because you can't prove it's yours. You can't either. But it was on our state land. It's on my land. That's ours now. The mob is cleaner than that.

[B]

Yeah. And I like that's where straight what we're doing. He found it and there's no heirs or anything.

[C]

And it's the weird thing is it's the decency of that human being to say, hey, I don't know. This might not be on the up and up, but I found some gold in my backyard and I don't want to get in trouble. And the state's like, that's great. Good for you. We're keeping that. Well, wait a second. Do I get anything for this? For being a good citizen?

[B]

No reward. No.

[C]

By the way, that was Brett's first on air admission. Yeah. That he's a mom. We do.

[A]

He said.

[C]

And it's true. That's a good point. No, no.

[A]

You said it was going to be honest about it. That's right. We're honest about.

[C]

That's right. He's honest about it.

[A]

Come on.

[C]

The Cosa Nostra, you know the life baby. But I'M calling brett a. I'm like, I know you goof about this, but you know sammy the bull, right? Right. I met him. All right, take me to him, sammy. You know, then I'm a target for the mom. This kid's got $800,000 in gold, boss. I'm like, I'm giving them to you. I'm not asking for much Other than to just be part of this. You can have half, and that's when those guys are your pals.

[A]

Absolutely.

[C]

I'm not going to go in there and go get this done for me. I'm like, look, let's split this. It's worth it to me that you get half of this to keep these idiots off my back.

[B]

First of all, I mean, I'm no professional, But I'm thinking if you find gold bars and they're like, oh, we know where they're made.

[C]

Yeah.

[B]

I'm creating a little fire and melting that. It's liquid gold.

[A]

Yes.

[C]

I don't know.

[B]

And make it into a lump.

[C]

There's a dude that stands on 16th and Bethany with a sign every day. It says, we buy gold. Okay, well, I've got that. I just found a lot of it, so I'm going to bleed that out over the next few months.

[B]

Months.

[C]

Found another one. I'm guessing he doesn't buy the gold, right? No, no. He just spins the sign.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

The dudes in the. I would hope not. There's two places that's on him. Nothing. If he's finished. Look, there's a still. He just spins the sign. He's homeless. He's up on another street spinning. A sign says, make your own pizza. I see him all over the place.

[B]

Imagine some idiot going, all right, here's my gold.

[C]

Yeah. Megan's dad gives him money. And, like, he's got to eat. And I'm like, he's fat as. This dude's getting fatter by the day. He's a. He's a homeless. That's just. He's like magic johnson with aids. He just got hu. Huge. He's not. He ain't suffering for food. So he does the. We buy gold spinnies, but next to it is the dose chris cupcake store. I'm like, man, there's a lot going on in this shopping cart. And then that's texas grill.

[B]

Any good at spinning or he just holds?

[C]

No, he's funny because it's almost like if michael j. Fox was a sign spinner. He just kind of. He just kind of shakes the sign.

[A]

So tax season Is he wearing the Statue of Liberty outfit, too?

[C]

Well, not on that corner. He still buys gold.

[B]

Okay.

[C]

And up the road. Road. When you're. When they don't want to buy gold anymore for a couple days, he goes up the road and spends a sign for some pizza place. But he doesn't spin it and his head's down. He's go on 16th and Bethany. He's there every day. Sometimes he's on the Starbucks side. Sometimes he's over by Texas Grill. But when you stop, he just. He doesn't lift his head, but his eyes go up, and he stares directly at you. And then the sign just starts shaking. He doesn't. There's no effort involved. A lot of the times it could be. A lot of the times the arrow's not even pointing towards. It's just, come on. We're close enough. You can figure this out. He's pointing across the street. Sometimes you just. It's like he's having a little seizure. Just pushes it back and forth. It's just the sign's moving around.

[B]

Researchers say raccoons may be inching closer to becoming pets.

[C]

Don't do this. You want this to be a thing.

[B]

Don't worry.

[C]

Is this an organized raccoon?

[B]

A study from the University of Arkansas department of biology found that raccoons are physically chained, changing in response to their interaction with humans.

[C]

Because they eat our trash. Yeah.

[B]

And by physically changing, they mean their faces are evolving to look cuter. Yep. They're not dumpster diving. They're. They're. They're basically becoming less disease.

[C]

They're adorable homeless people. They beg for things. And the cuter they are, the more and the nicer they are, the better their chances are of getting some of your granola.

[B]

One body biologist says once wild animals start spending time in the proximity of people, they become a little bit less afraid and perhaps even start showing physical signs of domestication syndrome. Raccoons aren't the only animals that's happening to. Foxes and mice are living urban areas and have a softer facial features.

[C]

But we've called it a. Yeah, they're mean.

[B]

They're mean.

[C]

Raccoons aren't friendly when they don't want to be. And they get real strong real fast.

[B]

And once. Yeah. They get to a certain age, they get crotchety.

[C]

Yeah, so do all of us.

[B]

I tried it.

[C]

That's true of every human and animal. Get a little older, you get a little. They do crotchety. But you can't claw someone's eyes out when you're 80. You're going to get beat up for lack of trying. A raccoon will mess you up.

[B]

A guy in Rockford, Illinois got arrested on Friday after hanging out the side of his car and swinging a gun around because he thought the ladies would like it. Someone called 911 after they saw 27 year old Saba Bonilla hanging out the window of a black SUV and waving a semi automatic rifle. It was a Smith and Wesson. It looked like an AR15.

[C]

I'm right here ladies. Look, if I had a friend named Saba, I'd be like, hey Saba, you know what the lady's like? What is that my friend? They like when you hang out a window and wave your gun around and scream.

[B]

The gun sitting in the back seat of the SUV when the cops caught up with him. He also had a large capacity magazine with 30 volts hidden in his pant leg. At least two women were in the car with the him. And when the cops ask why he waved the gun around, he said he was attempting to have sexual relations with them and believe the women like these things.

[C]

And under the understanding that when the women are not dressed like beekeepers, they are horny for guys with power.

[B]

Turns out he's been convicted on weapons charges four separate times. Oh no. They arrested him for unlawful possession of a gun. He's doing court December 16th.

[C]

You know what though? Speaking like with the raccoons have evolved to being cuter. The terrorists have evolved to have better lies. When they got caught about to shoot up a building, I wanted to sex the ladies.

[B]

What does Saba Bania look like?

[C]

Oh, Saba Bania is exactly what I'm saying. He's got a beard. Just a beard? No mustache. Just a beard. Chin strap, dark, devil like eyes. A hat. So what age you thinking?

[B]

20, 27?

[C]

I was going to say 28. I didn't. I don't remember. Maybe it was subconscious that I thought about that big white sheet for a shirt.

[B]

Come on now.

[C]

Yeah, everything. And when I say whatever pops into your head immediately is what he looks like.

[B]

All right, I'll go anti.

[C]

I'm gonna say trucker hat. He's a white guy.

[A]

Pure white.

[C]

Saba Bonia.

[A]

I'm going doughboy from Boys in the Hood.

[C]

It's a black guy. Yeah, Saba Bonia is Ads5's closest. He's kind of just like post Malone. Middle Eastern Post Malone. Yeah. Don't call him Jesus. That'll. They'll go through the roof. Sorry. He hates that you say I look like Jesus.

[B]

These women Love it.

[C]

The chicks, they dig the gunplay. You put your hats on. Go cover up your head and ankles. No, don't show. Don't care. But what is going down in my hood? Islamabad, boys in the hood.

[B]

A wine company commissioned the poll about Thanksgiving and asked people according to the top 10 topics we should not. We should avoid on Thanksgiving. Politics.

[C]

Politics. Religion.

[B]

Yeah, politics. Engaged. Money.

[C]

Money. Gay.

[B]

Appearance or weight.

[C]

Oh, yeah. You know, you don't do that at Thanksgiving or any other time. Start telling me. Hey, you're looking a little fat there. Quiet down, piggy. Stay away from the mashed potatoes. You've had enough starch.

[B]

Their ex.

[C]

Yeah. You don't talk about any of it. That's common knowledge. Say, how's Tracy? Brad?

[B]

What?

[C]

Past the potatoes, you prick.

[B]

Personal, don't show.

[C]

Understand you're out of work. That must be tough. And fat.

[B]

I said current relationship status. What, are you writing a book?

[C]

I don't remember hiring you as my biographer. What's with all the questions? What are you supposed to talk about? That would be more helpful. Give me five things that are easy to get through out of Thanksgiving. I can. I'll. I'll tell you this.

[B]

Well, it's easy, even if, like, you know, they said relationship status. How's it going with everything? Oh, good.

[C]

I'll tell you this right now, even.

[B]

If it's not, you know.

[A]

Well, it's a hell of a conversation.

[C]

Here's the challenge. They're done with the question, but here's the challenge. I could give you five topics that seem safe. We could play a game with my mom and any other person.

[B]

How many steps does it take?

[C]

How many steps to get to Fox News? Yep. How many steps? And, like, hi, how's your. How's Mathias doing? She's still working at a bar. Bar. Bet you they got a lot of Mexicans bartending there. Oh, here we go. Biden's America. Not my mom. But that's an exaggeration. Although a couple of pops in her. You're going to hear about immigration. Oh, you're going to hear about immigration. Yeah.

[B]

I tell Lisa.

[C]

I'm like, you can't drink because she can't do it. The rest of your family is pure red, and she can't do it because she's pure blue. Yeah. So she's triggered easily by just a simple joke. There's been a few times. Yeah, I'm sure of it. And you have to take her in the other room and go, how. How soon until she's talking about Ms. Now? The new network formerly known as MSNBC or other people in the family talking about Fox News, you can have a conversation about flowers. And if there's a. If there's a crazy communist like Toledo's got, and she's up against some reds, the other Reds. John holmberg's morning sickness. The 98. Kupd k. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[B]

One of the cousins already said two steps.

[C]

Yeah, two steps till Lisa says something.

[B]

Yep, he's been there. Vince has been.

[C]

Because if you even say, like, my God, the flowers on the camelback right now with all this rain, you know that's not gonna end if we leave the French trump environmental. Oh, here we go.

[B]

So to her credit, usually, and the family's credit, it usually doesn't jump to.

[C]

Start with Fox News or. Oh, no, now, like you said, one, two steps.

[B]

It'll start with the appetizers.

[C]

You know what I'm gonna do? I'm coming over your house for Thanksgiving. I'm sit at the table, and my first words are gonna be, how's everybody doing? Oh, we're great.

[B]

How are you?

[C]

Mom, Donnie, go do that because they're.

[A]

All from Long Island.

[C]

Yeah. Oh, my God.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

You have the funnest Thanksgiving.

[B]

It's it. I love throwing the.

[C]

Now we got a communist mayor panic.

[B]

It's over. Over.

[A]

Please set up some ring cameras.

[B]

It's the conversation grenade. Mom.

[C]

Donnie, mijo. I would just Sam Elliott that. And then I. Then you'd see. Where did John go? Well, he said, mom, Donnie, and he left. Jerk.

[B]

Heinz has launched its first ever squeezable gravy bottle, featuring homestyle turkey gravy. It's called leftover gravy. Specifically for the sandwich.

[C]

Oh.

[B]

It's available [e-mail].

[C]

All right, you. That is the best delivery you've ever given of any story. Most clear, concise, all the sentences. There wasn't a pause. There wasn't that three words.

[B]

And I stumble on that previous one about the poll. Took you about four.

[C]

All of a sudden, he's Rod. Roddy. Sold. [e-mail]. thanks. First time I've ever said Brady is a serious broadcaster. He meant that one. And by the way, they make that story. They make that stuff out of that lady's armpit. Oh, leftover gravy, they call it.

[B]

I got a couple of radio videos. First one's a little road rage right here in Arizona.

[C]

Oh, here we go.

[B]

We've been finding.

[C]

Yeah, there's been a couple.

[B]

Yeah.

[C]

Last week we had that horrible crash.

[B]

Trash There might be cussing on this.

[C]

But I don't how to make a right turn in Arizona. It says, oh, guy's getting out of his car right there. Oh, and another guy just hits him and pushes. He hits. He's trying to push him to say, you're not going. Oh, it's a rotors. Now the other guy's standing on the car that hit his. Now a dog kicking the winch. There's a dog. This is 27th Avenue. What is the intersection? I want to know. That has az.

[B]

I'm trying to see the sign up there. Going for the dog.

[C]

I guess it's av. Oh, no. He hit the guy. Holy smokes street is that. It's got to be.

[A]

I'm guessing we care more about the street than what happened.

[C]

I'm thinking something like it's got to have a. There's a 20 or a 30 next. Oh, Ave. Is. That goes without saying. This dude's just. And the Mexican music isn't helping the. The stereotype. Oh, there's the dog.

[A]

The video for the Maryvale Chamber.

[C]

Yeah. This was their visit. Maryvale video.

[B]

Bring it.

[C]

He's got a car and he brought it and he hit him and then he ran away.

[A]

43Rd and P. Yeah.

[C]

I gotta tell you, Brady, I don't think that anybody cares about the dog. I think the dog is just going about his 43rd Avenue Peoria business like a regular. He's going to work.

[B]

It's weird. Why? You know, of all the places to stand back in the middle of the road the other way.

[C]

The dog might have gotten out of the car because he saw what was coming. Disabled, Brady. So. Yeah, and he's about to be. This dude cuts around the corner. 43rd Avenue and Peoria. By the way, this was posted by Arizona Avenue Asians. So maybe there's. Click on that real quick. All right.

[B]

All right.

[C]

What are they doing? What are you. What are you guys up to?

[B]

22, 000 local.

[C]

That's an Indian. How.

[B]

Pima.

[C]

Those are Indians.

[B]

Why so many Mexicans have Filipino DNA?

[C]

That's one of their videos. I know that.

[B]

That's.

[C]

What's with all the pictures of Indians. All right. And crashed cars. That's racist. Came here to the Arizona territory story. They came across our ancestors and they asked them. They said, well, you think our ancestors spoke Spanish? They were Asian.

[A]

So they replied.

[C]

Means, I don't know. So then those. Why is Arizona Asian so focused on this tribal speech? And then everything I'm seeing is just car accident.

[B]

Here's another One.

[C]

Is that what it's waymos hitting each other. Is this a joke? Arizona. Arizona Asians. And it's just dedicated to car wrecks in some sort of bigoted way.

[A]

That's not my website.

[C]

No, I was gonna say. Brett, are you the. What's that one? There's one Asian. Click on the Asian lady and see what she's. A simple trick to squeeze out every last drop of lotion when it feels empty and was shocked by how much she saved. Take a look. She's opening a lotion bottle. She's got a theragun massager. She's putting it against the lotion bottle and massaging out the lotion. Usually you do need both of these items. Wow, look at that. It's a half a bottle of lotion coming out of there. If you just barragun your lotion. All right, I'll tell Alex today.

[B]

So, yeah, she got half the bottle.

[C]

Yeah. They're an innovative people. Brett discovered a simple trick. Why is there a Mexican doing the voiceover? It just go get some more lube. And then there's. There's a black guy. What's going on on Asian Arizona? Oh, they're making bacon tender and super tasty, just like the dishes served in restaurants. After soaking, mix the pork belly with ginger, garlic, a little oyster sauce, pepper salt, and some peanut oil. Coat it evenly with a spoonful of starch. Asian bacon. Brady, stop. Put your pants on.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

Arizona Asians. It's says all right. And it's just car accidents. Brett.

[A]

Don't look at me.

[C]

I'm gonna have you talk to Trip later. You gotta take down your new stupid Instagram page.

[B]

Apparently, it's sponsored by Learner and Row.

[C]

Learner and row are involved 1, 9. Oh, oh, oh. Because it's car accidents. Yeah. Well, that's helpful. Asians need to know that number. This is racist. Arizona Asians.

[B]

Second one.

[C]

Call Lerner and Row. Arizona Asians is just car wreck. Which is hilarious.

[B]

Whoever did that profile say on the.

[C]

That is so funny.

[B]

The official 26 years of helping us serve the community.

[C]

The official Asian social club of Arizona since 1999. And literally, Ian Schwarz follows it.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

All right. It's just car. You might have been listening to us.

[B]

And just did that.

[C]

Now. That's just wrong.

[B]

I think he's been there for a while.

[C]

Come on. You can't have, like, a foodie guy.

[B]

There's foodie.

[C]

If you had Arizona Mexicans, the Instagram page, and it was just places where strawberries grow. Okay. Can't do that or just good Home Depot parking lots.

[B]

Another one for Native Americans.

[C]

He's an Indian. What are they doing on the Asian much about it? Here are some facts that might surprise you. It's celebrated in November, timed with the harvest season to honor the rich history. What is going on on Arizon, Arizona? Asians. Indians have taken it over. I don't know. Huh. All right, well, we learned something.

[B]

Next was a little nose procedure. It's got bad sinus.

[C]

Oh, he's got tweezers in the nostrils. This never ends good. They're pulling out a block or something. What is that? Oh, is that a big booger? Is that a fish?

[B]

Watch this.

[C]

Oh, my God. It's some sort of. It's melted caramel and it's in this guy's nostril.

[A]

Has he never blown his nose?

[C]

Insane. It does look like a. Like a fish.

[B]

A fish, yeah.

[C]

Oh, and then it turns into just a melted. It looks like when they split up a Snickers bar on tv. Oh, my God.

[B]

I still have Snickers at home.

[C]

Oh, man. Well, break it in half and take a look at it when you stretch that caramel.

[B]

This is a workers comp insurance film that employees have to watch.

[C]

We're in a factory of some sort.

[B]

Yeah, it's.

[A]

Oh.

[C]

Oh, Jesus. It's real. It's real. Horrible things that can happen. You on the job. Oh, a nail shoots up into a guy's eye. Dad's worst fear. A guy swings a. Oh, a guy stuck into a. Just spun him up. Oh, it's just every tragedy in the office, they've. Look at this one. Oh, the tank. A hydraulic tank gets loose and hits a guy in the head. A forklift tipping over and crushing a dude. It's every accident that can happen in an industrial scene setting recreated.

[B]

Don't let this happen at work.

[C]

Smooshed a dummy. Oh, my God.

[B]

What is happening? Is there an end to this?

[C]

This is the.

[B]

No, it's. That's.

[C]

Did Michael Scott make that? Some dude just fell onto a Things.

[B]

That can happen here at the warehouse. And comments say Final Destination, OSHA edition.

[C]

It was horrible.

[A]

People are saying about the website there. Well, India is part of Asia, dude.

[C]

Not those.

[A]

Yeah, I know.

[C]

No, that's, you know, Cleveland. Wahoo. The feather ones. Not the ones that poop at Tempe Town Lake, maybe. I don't know. Not the dudes in dresses who serve food that's inedible. Inedible.

[B]

They're not serving food with their feet. Yeah, that's true.

[C]

If you can't tell the difference. Then you're not playing along. All right, Brett, what do you got?

[A]

All right, start off with. Hang on, let me rewind this. They're saying this would be me if I was a cop.

[C]

Okay. It's a police officer with some lady yelling at us right in his face. He's smiling. She's losing it. She's an inch from this guy's face and he just pepper sprayed her from an inch inch. Oh, and he had a big smile on his face.

[A]

Like that would be Brett just smiling, waiting away.

[C]

He's smiling cuz he knows he put it right in her mouth. Is that AI?

[B]

I think it looks a little.

[C]

She starts her scream a little early. Yeah, well, just might be a soundish. They are not. Still hilarious. Still awesome. Yeah, I hope it's not. All right, here's a sex mouth. You can buy one of these mouths that just. And he put it on a vacuum. He put the sex mouth on the end of a vacuum and now he's got his partially erect penis and it's. Here we go. Oh my God. Ah, that went so bad, Brady. You don't find that funny? That went so bad, Brady can't relate to that. I think all of us can think about almost doing that. Oh, you were mad about the pubes. Brady likes a nice shor Japanese penis. I mean, this does not go well at all. That is horrible. Dude had such good intentions too. We're about to have the best day ever. I figure out a way to make a vacuum. A sex robot. That one actually putting sex mouth on the end of a vacuum. And he would suck for hours. No more women. This is Missouri.

[B]

Oh man. That's the 10th one.

[A]

That could be a bottom of the top 10.

[C]

That's. Yeah, that's just fun. That's a good opener.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

Okay, here's another one.

[A]

It's a lady with her dog.

[C]

We got a surveillance camera. She's getting out of one of these. She's getting out of what looks like a. No, it's not cool. It's nothing cool about that.

[B]

Automated.

[C]

That's a tuk tuk. And. Oh, she fell in her manhole. She got out of this little weird tiny matchbox car. Her dog standing there. Smart enough, she stands in a manhole and it swallows her completely. Swallows her. Followed her. Now she belongs to the beast. Oh my God. Yeah. Down she went. And their manhole covers are like on spinners. Holy smokes. Yeah, she's dead.

[B]

I don't know. Because the dog, she went down there with A leash.

[C]

Yeah. Trying to grab onto the sewer in that country. That dog wasn't gonna last through lunch to go to Asian Arizonans and see. I bet you it's on there.

[A]

All right, we got this one off that page.

[C]

It's a big lady. Oh. Just attacked by a goat ram for the fan. She's holding on top of a trash can to defend herself from a rogue goat. That dude's just laughing. And the goat took her down. He horned her. These are fun today. Other than that new nose thing.

[A]

This one. This.

[B]

The.

[A]

The. The title is. This must have been the broad that Trump was talking about.

[C]

Piggy off the Peppa Pig page. Peppa Pig. I'm Peppa Pig.

[B]

She kind of looks like.

[C]

This is my little brother. Ge. It cut to a fat lady wearing a pig snout having relations with a man. Get him, little piggy. I gotta tell you something. Whoever the dude is in that video is my idol because he got a fat girl to wear the nose and say oink, oink during sex.

[A]

And he stayed erect during it.

[C]

Well, that's.

[A]

I mean, look here.

[B]

He's looked like she was on a.

[C]

He's a special man. Huh.

[B]

Didn't look like it was a dude.

[C]

That it probably wasn't a real human being. Nobody would have sex with her. But the fact that she put the nose on and said oink, oink. She had to get talked into that.

[A]

Here's the new Asian sex dolls.

[C]

Okay.

[A]

Don't need the rest of.

[C]

Oh, my God. Just ahead. And it attaches to the end of your chair and goes through the motions of the up and down of oral sex. This technology is revolutionary. It's the most amazing invention ever. You know who came up with that? The dude with that vacuum sex mouth. The next day. Okay, that didn't work. We try a new thing and decapitated a woman. Okay, here's somebody's. What is that? A mouth? Okay, we've got somebody duct taped in. All red duct tape. They are missing their arms and legs. They're from the knees down and from the elbows down. They've been amputated and their whole body is wrapped up in duct tape. Their mouth is spread open with a speculum and their head and eyes are all taped up. They're shoving a Poor Kim is something. They're having a gimp eat. That was just weird.

[A]

Yeah. So that's it. That's all we got.

[C]

Okay. I don't even know what. I don't know that.

[A]

No, there's really nothing.

[C]

How do you get red tape like that. Holy smokes. Well that was fun. It was fun everybody. I really enjoyed that vacuum guy cuz you know when he, he was sitting at work one day and he goes oh wait a minute. And that when that idea dawned on him. Oh, oh what the hell. I have to go home. Yeah, let's take a look at that again. I don't know what he's seen in Japanese but he's. It has to be. I'm so excited. You're never going to see me. Listen to him scream. The best part is him and you can't hear it over the. The vacuum destroying his penis. But listen to him in the background screaming. It just did not go well that the vacuum. Is it too good? Dangerous? Should I have a warning sticker? Oh, how I survived my teen years without trying that once is beyond. Yeah, I mean I thought about it when my dad bought that Electrolux and we called him the girl. Little pig.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

From that hot door to door salesman. 19 year old girl sold him a 1200 vacuum in 1993. It's like a four thousand dollar vacuum for no reason. We had a two thousand square foot house in the. Some of it was wood and tile, a couple of rugs to vacuum it at. Hammer. Marcy's gonna love this. But I looked at that thing and had attachments and hoses and spaces.

[B]

Put the wood floor attachment on there.

[C]

Oh hell yeah. That was probably what he was thinking.

[A]

Is that the one? He would go and lift a couple dumbbells real quick when they came over and hell yeah.

[C]

Pump up, swell up. Her name was Lee, Lisa and I. The fact she wasn't in 80s rock videos is still a mystery why like if anyone from Bang Tango would have seen her that she'd have been in their video the next day.

[B]

Because she's the number one vacuum.

[C]

Well she ended up. She was so hot. She just wanted some money. And somebody's like some guys like you could sell vacuums for a worst thing ever. To put that angel in a situation where she went door to door. She was going to sell a lot of vacuums but she was also probably going to get kidnapped or murdered. Definitely touched inappropriately. But yeah. My dad, when Lisa would come over on a Saturday, my sister would get in a bathing suit and be like what's going on? Some of the girls are gonna come over. I'm gonna go swimming. Who? Tina and Tracy and I think Lisa, I'll be right back. You go grab that curl bar and just hear for like 15 minutes breathing it out. Comes back in his Shirt. He's all swollen. When are they getting here? Another hour. God damn it. You have to take a break, have some wheat germ and then go back and do it again. When the doorbell rang, I was gonna go swimming too. Don't come out, dad. Especially those weird boner shorts you wear. It's not boner shorts. I just prefer a tighter swimsuit.

[B]

Quit it.

[C]

Leave us out there. Ding dong. I got it. I'll get it. Don't answer that door yet. Eighteen. Oh, Jesus Christ. We had a couple more plates. If I get 10 push ups in real quick, I can. The chest will be tight too. Oh, it's. It's Stanna's little friend. What was your name again, darling? Lisa. That's right, Lisa. Your shorts are small, sir. Well, that's. I can't help it. There's a lot of big things in there. Not so much about small shorts as what's filling them. Anyway, they're in the backyard in the back pool next to the camera. I mean the lemonade. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady Report. It's 98. It's out of control now. 98k you PDs. Morning sick, morning sickness. There you go. Thank you. Shine down. That's the sound. Sound of madness. So much going on here. We got pledio next week starting on Monday. That should be fun. It always is fun. It's, it's. It's daunting to stare it in the eyes, but it always is fun. Joe Coy is going to be here on Saturday. And you know, we're great friends with Joe Coy for a long time. And then we told him, you're gonna get too big and you're not going to come in here anymore. And he goes, that'll never happen. And that's exactly what happened. And I'm proud that it happened. That's a good thing. Thing. But evidently there's still some tickets for sale. Last time he played down at the arena, it sold out really fast. This time there's a couple tickets available still. So Joe Coy might join us this week. And I'm like, I told you I'd see you on the way down too. I love Joe. Tried to text him the other day with one of the four numbers I've had for Joe Coy over the years. And he changes his phone number like every year. I, I simply, I didn't either. Didn't get a response or. None of them are his numbers anymore. And that I'm happy for too. He. He. He ended up banging Chelsea Handler for a little while and got super duper famous for. He still is, but, like, super banging. Like, he was everywhere. He hosted the damn Golden Globes, done.

[B]

A couple of movies.

[C]

Yeah. There he was texting me at my house before all this, asking me what I thought of his special. And now he doesn't need me. And I like that. But pretty soon, you know what? I might ask him on Thursday if he'll be part of our happy ending show because he needs some work. He owes.

[B]

He.

[C]

He does, though. I feel you're right, Brett. But we got that going, too. And the tickets went fast for the Happy Endings Homeburg After Dark show. Not much left on that one. So if you guys want to go. It's December 20th, 12th starts at 9. 45. Brett does the videos. We have like, a recap of the year, bring out our special guests. And in the past, it's been. It's been a really fun show. We got. We all get drunk, we dick around. We have a live show for an hour and a half, and then we get the hell out of there and drink some more with you guys, the third annual Homeberg After Dark. Awesome stuff. Happy Endings. It's the. It's our last big live event we do of the year. And you buy it over [e-mail] 20 bucks for a regular ticket, 29.90 or 29.7 29 for reserve seating. VIP stuff that already sold out, so you might be able to straggle a couple in there. But right now the VIPs are gone, and all the proceeds go to the Arizona Humane Society. And we want to thank Lerner and Row and my friend Dr. Fixler from Happy Endings Euthanasia for kicking in a donation already for the Humane Society. So we're. We're already doing well with that one, so. Didn't get enough. We don't have enough with the Humane Society this year because they took our golf tournament away. The lawyers really ruin that. And then I'm proud to announce this, too, right in the face of every manager in radio. That may ruin this. I had a meeting yesterday, and I'm not going to guarantee it, Brady, but I've introduced certain people to other people. We're going to have that golf tournament again next year.

[B]

Hello.

[C]

How you. I might have to pay for it, but that basically means nobody here is going to be able to sell it but me. So I'll make all the money, too, and then give that money to the charity the proper way. We're going to have that Golf tournament, whether KUPD is involved or not, because the lawyers ruined everything. Trust me. Screw the Bobs. They didn't stand up for it. They didn't fight. We'll get it back. Trip's been fighting for us, too. We'll get that thing. But I had a nice meeting yesterday. I'm like, it looks pretty good that we can do this. We found a couple side doors. Get around the morons. It's not official yet, but I really enjoyed my meeting. And I have no, particularly not that hard. Larry's gonna come in and go, why did you do that? I'm like, larry, trust me, I don't care. So it doesn't matter anymore what they think. It was a good meeting, though. I'm like, oh, we can do this. We can make this happen. The best part of the meeting is when the guy on the other line goes, worst case scenario, we'll just do it ourselves. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. We'll just cut your guys out. Yeah, yeah. And then he would throw the golf tournament, and I would, quote, quotey fingers host it, but we would just do everything the same. And then they'll have meetings going, how come our revenue's down?

[B]

I don't know.

[C]

John made $300,000 for a charity in a weekend. You guys didn't want to be part of that anyway, we'll try that. So that's going to be good, too. And then the better thing is also for charity. Another great thing. And again, the emails that I was going back and forth with yesterday, inevitable. But we do that thing for military assistance mission, and it's happening again, and you guys have already kicked in pretty nice. I got to get on there and do some stuff today. You basically shop for the troops, and that's how we do this. It's a. It is a great deal. Fitz is way behind this thing. He's all over. He's on the board for the military assistance mission, ma'.

[B]

Am.

[C]

And we do the holiday giving thing. So they call it Homburg helps, but it has nothing to do with me. It's all military assistance mission. Learner and row ambulance co. We got together with them the military assistance mission, and we provide military parents a chance to shop for their kids this holiday season. And the donations are being accepted through the Amazon wish list at 98 KUPDCOM. It's been a weird year for them. And I've told you this before, I said it yesterday. I, too, was skeptical of why we needed to shop for troops, families. Why do we need to do this? They've got jobs, they've got. And then you see it in action. You're like, holy smokes. And you hear the story stories. These people need this help. It is. You are not especially the National Guard guys who get pulled away from a job sometimes and it's. They get. Financially, it gets a little bit weird sometimes for those low level military guys and they have a kid and whatever else, for whatever reason, they're struggling, but they're still troops. And we support the troops. We say we do. You should never argue this because when you go to the event and see these people shopping, you realize, oh my God, if we're really going to support the troops, it's more than just standing up at a baseball game and saying, hey, thanks. It's about doing stuff like this. It's going to be awesome. We're going to do the big shopping event December 20th at the Franciscan Renewal Center. That's that place right off of Lincoln. Yeah.

[B]

Yep.

[C]

Okay. That's huge.

[B]

Nice.

[A]

So it's not like the normal spot that we've always been at.

[C]

Yeah, it's really big. I know that. You go, it's over by El Charo.

[B]

They expanded it. Yeah.

[C]

Okay, so we'll do that. And special thanks again to Lerner and Rowe and Wayne and Ann Camco for helping us out. You can check it all out at 98kupd.com all that information sits right in front of you right there. That's glorious. And that's just some housekeeping we had to do about all the things that are going on here. Trying to help out and get it together. Also just got an email from a guy that said, john, I was listening to you. He's about an hour behind about the Visit Rwanda thing. We were talking about earlier. The Los Angeles Clippers have visit Rwanda on their jerseys. And he said, and you talked about the, the genocide of Christians in Rwanda 30 years ago ago and how it's a little early to start visiting Rwanda, still in Uganda, their neighbor. So picture New Mexico. They're doing a full on Christian genocide slaughter there. And that's just, you know, that would be like if Las Cruces was killing Mormons. And we're like, why don't you come on over here to Phoenix? Be like, I'm not, I'm going, that's too close. It's. And. And we in the last 30 years have killed a bunch of Mormons too. You still have too many people. Somebody emailed and said, why wouldn't you be able to go to Germany in the 70s? I'm like, 70s is right when you were starting to be allowed to again. You have to realize in the 50s and 60s, the ideas of the Germans hadn't left yet. So, yeah, they lost the war, but there were still a healthy amount of them that were walking around going, you know, we were on the right track. Yeah, like, you have to age those ideas out. I always go back to what my incredibly smart international friend Thomas Wells said, worst day in human history was when that Berlin Wall fell. Like, what? Yeah, you divided all the people that liked old Germany and you put them back. Like, hey, I never thought of anything. They didn't just show up. They showed up with their ideas and they brought them to Germany and it ruined it. Like, I guess you're kind of right. And it's our complaint about Californians moving forward here. Sure, they move here fine, but keep your ideas there. The reason you left can't come with you. You can't leave one place that got financially out of control to where you don't want to live there anymore. Move to Austin, Texas, and then start telling Austin how things worked out so much better where you left. If you left a place, it's because there was a better place in front of you. Don't bring your ideas. Thomas brought that. That's brilliant. So clippers still your visit? Rwanda of thing. There's a genocide next door. That's a good album name, but I kind of avoid those travel places. When your neighbor has a genocide and you had one too, yours is. Yours is dry. Theirs is very active too soon, maybe.

[B]

You look at it this way. Is there a Viking cruise available in that area? Whether it's safe or.

[C]

You know what one I'd go on instead?

[A]

Carnival?

[C]

No, Disney. I just get on that little thing and go through there. Jungle cruise. I don't even know what Rwanda and Uganda look like. Can't be too different than that guy shooting hippos with a cap gun. Well, you know what it is for safety. Here's another thing that's great, Brady, you have a hearing aid because you have a little hearing loss. I've been to a ear doctor in the last few years, and wearing headphones our whole entire existence does no good for your ears. It's bad. And I think we're gonna have a future of people with hearing problems because of earbuds and all the stuff we do with our ears. So I've gone and he's like, yeah, you've got low level loss. It's age related, but also what you do. And I've abused my ears with rock concerts and actually being on stage with things in my ears that are blowing up and lots of loud noises and being in bands and things like that they have just discovered. And it makes the phrase hard of hearing. Hilarious that Viagra actually cures low level deafness.

[B]

Gold.

[C]

Yeah. So you can actually sit and listen. You know, eventually on enough Viagra you're going to sit and think to yourself, what's that noise you're going to hear? That's my dick getting hard. I can hear it now. So you'll have both things cured. Your impotence and your hearing loss will be. It's not going to cure deafness, but for low level stuff, maybe hearing early hearing aids, you know, when you start hear when somebody's talking, you're like they're making words but none of them make sense. Viagra evidently can fix that. So if you're hard of hearing, haha.

[B]

You'Re now hard on hearing.

[C]

Yeah, hard on hearing. They say that Viagra could eventually, if they can tap into what it's doing to hearing, they think it can reverse deafness.

[A]

Unless your wife's talking. It doesn't work for that though, right?

[C]

Yeah, because that's also going to kill your boner.

[B]

Right?

[A]

Right.

[C]

So she's, she's the anti Viagra. Ironically, the thing you take it to nail is the thing that causes the impotence in the first place. With the rolls and the cheese and the stuff going on and the smells and the. That's the Jim Jeffries thing. He said, I don't think Viagra is necessary. Necessary. He goes, I think the cure for impotence is a young woman. He goes, because you never hear of that. I never had a problem with boners when I was young. It only happened when I got older. I started having sex with a young girl again and it was back. So I think they cure it. Never see an old man talk about his issues when he's dating someone who's like 40 years younger than him. It's gross, but still anyway, yeah, it keeps you, keeps you up and now the hearing of hardness can go away. And I think that's pretty cool.

[B]

It's amazing.

[C]

They can cure deafness with boner pills.

[B]

It's two for one.

[C]

Here's the other thing about that. How bad did they swing and miss on what they were working on with Viagra? Because wasn't it a blood pressure pill? Yeah, they don't even use it for that. And they didn't change a thing. They're like, what does this work on his blood pressure? No. Dude's heart is a rock. And he's here. He's like a bat and in there.

[B]

But it lowered his blood pressure.

[C]

Yeah, I don't know what it did. It made him happy. He just seems comfortable again. Your blood pressure goes up because you can't get a heart on. That's a lot of stress. You start walking around getting wood anytime you want just because the pill now you can hear. And it is ironic, though. Brett's right. The thing that kills boners the most is woman talking. So maybe we can have like a shut off valve for your Viagra, bro. You know, it's a slow drip. We're going to do rock wars in just a little bit. It's 98 KUPD. It's out of control now. 98k, Morning sickness. We've got ourselves a rock wars ahead of us. Brett technically won last week because we honored you.

[A]

Thank you.

[C]

Through all your struggles, I heard a great story. You know you've recently gone through a loss.

[A]

Yep.

[C]

And somebody sent me a story of Ed o' Neill from. He's on Modern Family. And of course, he was Al Bundy, and he was talking on Kevin Pollock's podcast about how weird comic minds are and how weird the comedic mind is. Yesterday, Tripp, was it yesterday or the day before? We were walking out together, Brett and I. Oh, day before. And Tripp called. Brett, come in here for a second. Hey. I just wanted to say I'm sorry for your loss. And it. Nice words. I kind of caught it on my way by. Didn't hear what you guys talked about. You said some things. He related back. And as we're leaving, we're walking down the stairs, I turned to Brett and I said, are you still milking this thing? And of course, he laughed. Then somebody sent me a video of Ed o' Neal talking about John Lovetts. And he said, I saw John Lovitz two days after Phil Hartman was murdered at a. At a. It was Tiffany's in Beverly Hills. And he said, I never go in there. And he goes, but there he was inside. I was buying a gift for some somebody. And he said, there's Lovet. And he walks over and he said, you know, Phil Hartman and John Lovetz were brothers, like, beyond close. John Lovitz has told me and several other people on interviews and everything else that it took him about two weeks to stop throwing up. He was physically sick from Phil Hartman's death, but two days after that, he had something to do. And he's in the Tiffany and Ed o' Neill said he wandered over to him, said, hey, John, I'm so sorry.

[B]

For.

[C]

Phil, you know. And Lovet goes, what? He goes, you know, Phil. And he said, what are you talking about? I said, I just want to come over and say I was sorry for. For all that for Phil. Lis goes, what are you talking about? And he goes, the murder. And he goes, oh, that immediately went right to the darkest joke you can tell. So while Brett was in mourning last week, you know, we dealt with it. We gave you a suicidal tendency song and you won technically. But now. Enough milk in it, man. That's it. We're moving on. In honor of the comedic brain. You don't get any more freebies, pal. We're coming down to the nitty gritty. I don't care who else you know, gets Sicko's wife.

[A]

Come on, everything's free.

[C]

Come on, hook it up. But I'm just saying, no more tragedies. I'm hoping you've had a couple. You won last week. Do you have a topic for us? You don't have one yet. Oh, you son of a. And he's milking it some more.

[B]

Unbelievable.

[C]

Still too soon to yell at it.

[A]

Let's see what were. We talked about this. We talked about Brady's page. That came up.

[C]

You could talk about Viagra Hearing. Chamber of Commerce of Maryvale.

[A]

There you go.

[C]

No, don't just jump on that. And you especially. I'm not. That's not a topic you're allowed to be part of.

[A]

No, we'll do that.

[C]

Nope. Nope. How about the best song for grilled cheese weather? That's better than what you're going to do with the Maryville. All right, we'll give Brad a couple more minutes.

[A]

Damn it.

[C]

And he's got to come up with a topic. Come on, man. Be prepared.

[A]

You're Maryvale Chamber Commerce theme song would be amazing.

[C]

All right. I do like that. Okay, but you're not allowed to play.

[B]

Oh, okay.

[A]

All right, well, I will sit this one out. I just want to see what you guys come up with.

[C]

We'll let too play. No, we'll have you do it. He's in.

[B]

Already got a song.

[C]

A theme song for the.

[A]

I just got to narrow it down now.

[C]

Mary Fail Chamber of. Com and DOA Cat is not. You can't. Even though that song is hilarious. Maryvale Chamber of Commerce. A song that they play on their website or in their lobby or the hold music. The hold music when you call. Why would you call them. It's 9:31 if you want to help out Holmberg at 98kupd.com you can text 97936. Rock wars is next. John Holmberg's Morning Sickness. The 98 KUPD Holmberg's Morning Sickness. It's time for the weekly battle of musical supremacy known as Rock Wars Music Battle. It's brought to you by our friends over at Mo Money Pawn. And eventually I'll find it. There it is. Shorter long term collateral loans from $10 to over $100,000American money. No credit needed and top dollar paid. The entire process just taking several. Nice job, guys. Mo money pawn.com. it's too cold near to do that.

[A]

It is.

[C]

There was our teeth chattering. AC just kicked in and Tripp's calling us pussies. I had a conversation with him a week ago. I don't like it when it's like below 70 anymore. And I hate it when it's above 72. I'm like, oh, Jesus. He's reached that age where if it's not 71 degrees, I piss myself. He's yelling at us. It's freezing in here again. Our AC is broken, but it's not broken in the wrong way. It's too good and it shouldn't even be on. All right, Brett's talk earlier we talked about the Clippers having visit Rwanda on their jerseys this year. Don't. If the word don't was above it, it would make sense if the Clippers were making some sort of statement. But then we started talking about chamber of commerce in Rwanda. It would be the. The only work, only job. Harder would be Maryvale to try to get people to do tourism in Maryvale. So they have to have hold music. They have to have a Chamber of commerce. We looked it up. It's a bunch of Gilbert Mormons. We can't figure out they just give themselves awards for tolerating being in Maryvale. Was the vice president of the Chamber of Commerce awarded his company best company and he was another renegade of Maryville. It was the company of the and for the 12th month in a row. Imagine that. Brett, who would you like to go first for our Chamber of Commerce of Maryvale theme song?

[A]

I'm interested to see where Brady's going with me too.

[B]

All right. Well, I think they want to throw some, you know, their step up, their Fourth of July, the special, the holidays. They want to throw some bashes in Maryville. They want to encourage people to come out there.

[C]

Here we go.

[B]

I went with a group dia De los Muertos. That's. It requires money. So no money, no fiesta.

[C]

That's their theme song. Is it like art company? No money, no fiesta is the way they said, no money, no budget. This you're on hold, you hear? No money, no fiesta. Kind of like this. It appeals to the president and the tourists, basically saying, if you don't pay, you don't have a fiesta. We're not paying. There's no part of the party here. Welcome to Maryvale. All right. Kind of like that. No money, no fiesta. Brady, I don't know how you found that, but well done, because I know you didn't know about that song until three minutes ago.

[A]

We talked about searches earlier.

[C]

Your racist searches.

[B]

Phone. Are going to be the death of you, man. Put in metal Mariachi.

[C]

If he's on the Epstein files, they're going to think Jeffrey Epstein was the good guy. Yep. What's this? Lactating women, cripples having sex.

[B]

Sex?

[C]

No, it'd be attractive.

[B]

Cripples.

[C]

Yeah. Good look. Yeah. Yeah. Cripples with pretty faces doing it. Cripples, lactating. And cows. Bulls. Yeah. And like bulls killing Mexicans. All right, Would you like me to go next?

[B]

Yes.

[C]

Mine appeals to everybody in Maryvale, no matter what. Mine's the diversity program. It appeals to whites, blacks and Mexicans. And also let you know what you're getting into if you go there from another town. Hit it.

[B]

Were you trying to get crazy with this scene? Don't you know I'm local?

[C]

If you're on hold, thanks for calling Maryvale Chamber of Commerce. Someone will be with you in a minute. They've probably been shot. Oh, yeah. And I just want to hear this. After yesterday especially. Oh, I love it. You got a black guy and a Mexican guy in the van. This should play on the speakers of every street light 24 hours a day in there. All right, there you go. Like on that Arizona Asians page as we're watching that, it would be playing above the stoplight. Always. Yeah, always. All right, Brett, what do you got?

[A]

Hang on a second. I need to.

[C]

Oh, yeah, I gotta.

[A]

Yeah, I gotta pull the lyrics up and stuff, so.

[C]

And make them big. So I've got time. Oh, yeah. Well, you're starting right to me, are you? Starting right in the beginning? Yeah. Okay, good.

[A]

All right. Hang on a second. Let me.

[C]

Because you've evidently got a lot of curse. Oh, yeah.

[B]

Oh, yeah.

[A]

That's. I'm probably not going to win because of this. So me. You got all the white people from Gilbert over There being the chamber of commerce. So the only thing they can think of that's going to be happening in that neighborhood is from Body count Talk s get shot.

[C]

Wait, don't take the lyrics away.

[A]

I'm gonna get him.

[C]

I'm gonna get them. All right. Because he starts right away. I know the first line. Okay, here we go. Okay.

[A]

Didn't go?

[C]

No, I gotta start.

[A]

All right, hang on.

[C]

Oh, boy. Jesus, you're playing with fire over here.

[B]

Oh.

[C]

Talk, Damn it. I missed the first one. Act hard. No, jeez. I missed the second one. I did a terr.

[A]

I told you you weren't going to be able to do that one.

[C]

So anyway, that's where I'm going with finger. Hit the button. My apologies to everybody involved. I think I got them both. Yeah, I think. Good Lord. Talk s get shot. Brett, none of your selection was even mentioned on the air. According to people listening, all they heard was I would choose. So that's Brett choice. Yeah. Talk ass get shot.

[A]

That's the Maryville theme song.

[C]

You're not wrong. And given more time, I think I can do this. Who wins Some echoes there. I like yours, though. Thank you.

[B]

Thank you.

[C]

Will it be Brad? Will it be Brady's? No dinero, no fiesta. By who?

[B]

Dia de los muertos.

[A]

Look at that.

[C]

Will it be Body count Talk s get shot? Or will it be. Will it be Insane in the brain by Cypress Hill? We'll just take a call. How about that? 585-9800. The call. The call applies with one call. Says it all. I think that's learner and row. I want to thank them for being part of this if they are. Yeah. If you want to vote and fix it. 585-9-9800. You're going to wait for the delays to kick in. Who will win? The who will win Rock Wars?

[A]

Shouldn't be much delay.

[C]

We delayed twice. I know. We got. That's right. We should. We're actually probably right on it, huh? Here we go. Hi there. Who's this? It's Paul, your other blind listener. Paul, you're blind as well. You were the one that called and kind of said you were following me around. That's right. All right. I remember you. I've been looking for you. And I know you can't say the same, but. All right, Paul, who wins Rock wars this week? Oh, I am insane. Yes. Thank you. My thumbs survive it. Thank you, Paul the blind guy. Very appreciative. Have a great day. There you go, Paul.

[B]

Tell you later.

[C]

It he managed to get to the phone for. Well, that's just rude. That's just a dick thing to say. Can the blind be a final decision? Let's just make sure that we got it right and go to another. Hi, there. Who's this? Oh, this is Max. Max, go ahead and give us a vote as well. Just. We need a cited vote and a blind vote. Yeah, you got it, Chancellor. That's me again. Oh, there you go. This is simple. I don't know that button. Simple stuff. Thank you. Still nervous about my button on Brett's song. All right. Insane in the Brain, Take a break. We'll come back with the winner. Me. Brett Stun milked his tragedy long enough. That's mine. Now. Coming down to it, only a couple more weeks of Rock Wars. And, Brady, thanks for being here for all of them.

[B]

Not a chance.

[C]

It's 9. 51. Insane in the membrane will come up right after this. It's 98. There's Rock Wars. It's out of control now. 98. K U PD. Morning sickness. That's a great song. Still holds up. And the one Brett played yesterday, which was the R and B soul version. Somebody asked me, Brett, today, where you get all those?

[A]

I find them on YouTube.

[C]

That's it. You just search, like. But you specifically search a song as well.

[A]

Sometimes I do. Sometimes it's just coming up in my algorithm now. Because I've been looking so. So many for so many of them, so.

[C]

Because I'll get a few here and there. But you seem to get, like, totally great ones.

[A]

There's some clunkers that I do that I do find, you know, there's no doubt about.

[C]

And I've seen them, like, on Instagram and stuff. They pop up, but I don't know how to search it.

[B]

Pretty big. It's called fake music on Instagram.

[C]

Yeah. And I've seen that, and they're about. I don't know. But Brett has the ones I haven't seen yet, like, you seem to you. I. I guess they're.

[A]

That one was great. Straight out of Compton. One was amazing.

[C]

Most of them are awesome.

[A]

Even the one that. And you don't. You're not a big fan of the song, but that. The Danzig version of Mother was great, too.

[C]

Yeah.

[A]

The. The soul version of that.

[C]

I'm seeing a few country ones, and I don't know the songs.

[A]

Yeah.

[C]

And I like them because they're not country songs. But, you know, song you sent us the other day, the beer.

[B]

Yeah. Has gone viral.

[C]

Has it? Yeah. It's the thing I cut out every time a country singer says cold beer or beer in a song, and made a song out of all those clips, thousands of them. And that's cold beer. Cold beer. Cold beer. I could sing a country song all day. I watched the thing last night on the after what was on? Something was on. And then. Oh, it's Dancing with the Stars was on. And then afterwards they had. By the way, Dancing with Stars is exciting this year. I was watching for Corey Feldman, you know, who's really good in a super. It's almost like we.

[B]

It's almost like still in it.

[C]

Oh, God, no. He was off. Terrible. Nobody liked him. He was gone fast. The crocodile hunter's son. Robert Irwin is like the nicest, most likable dude on the planet. Like, I think you'd let him, like, if you just came over here. G', day, mate. How are you? It's like, great to see you, Robert. I'll come over here to finger your wife. Have at it. Like you would let him do anything. He's just so nice. You don't mind if I sink a couple digits in it, do you? No. Have fun. Didgeridoo, my friend. But that and all the girl dancers look good. And there's one of the Mormon wives got booted last night, and she was great. Like, everybody who's still in it is like. It's sexy. Alex Earl, the podcaster, she looks amazing. The guy she dances with is great. Everybody on TV on that is just beautiful. And they're doing this dancing thing. You call it gay all you want, but it's hot. It's like they're basically. And it was Prince night last night. So the music was. Anyway, end of it. I watched. They had some country show on, and they interviewed Kenny Chesney about how he got going in country music. And he's just sitting there going, well, you know, I went to Nashville and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Then he starts telling a story. And then they show him singing. Beer and dogs and trucks and hot dogs. What happened to your voice? Nobody sings like that. That's fake. And then I went over to St. John's and I married Renee Zellweger. I wrote a summer and she laughed. Cause I'm gay and I don't tell my companions. Why do you all sound like that. If you just made those noises and put a guitar behind it? Dogs. And she left me. God and the flag and a gun. Cold beer. You don't need words. Just make that weird trumpet sound with your nose and. And say, God, guns, beer Trucks, dogs. She left me and she left me beer. Idiots. If there was a civil war, I'd fight the country music people first. I. I actually booed at a charity event when one of the events was one of the auction items was the day at country Thunder Booze. I said that pretty loud. Didn't go for much either. And that's not good. The charity didn't win. It's time now for Brady to give you all the entertaining news he knows. We call this the entertainment drone is brought to you by our [e-mail] the home of tactical black self defense training. Not to be a scare fear monger, but I saw on the news yesterday a guy passed away from an unprovoked knife attack in downtown Phoenix. And when they tried to figure out what had happened, dude just got got up, started mouthing off to another guy. That dude didn't recognize that the dude he was talking to was not. Someone's gonna hear him. He was nuts. He was in his own world, threw a couple of knives on him and next thing you know, he's gone. Deescalating that thing would have helped a lot walking away from that when a homeless guy, my dad did it that time. A homeless guy looked at me and started saying my dad turned out goes what? Like leave, he's not home. You don't do that. There's a lot of that stuff where your manhood comes into play and you start thinking, I've got to defend you. Don't. Defending yourself by leaving is better. A lot of the times in fighting you should Mr. Miyagi only do it if it's absolutely necessary. Don't ever turn around and chase a knife. Don't ever turn around and chase a fight. Walk away. You're not going to prove anything by beating up a homeless dude. So just a warning. They're out there. They lose it every once in a while. It's not your job to defend everybody in the world because most likely you're going to get stabbed by a nutball. They're everywhere. And there's nothing wrong with being prepared. Your mindset will change the second you start going to react defense because when you're there, you'll realize, you know what? That is a smarter thing. And having somebody approach me who I don't know fighting them proves nothing except for I'm stupid and I might get killed by a crazy person. You just don't know the thing I'm most afraid of. By the way, when I. When I see a crazy person talking, isn't a knife. It isn't a gun. It's a needle. I can't see it. I don't know what he's done with it. And they're in their hands a lot. You get stabbed by Neil, you don't even know. And it's horrifying. And so just leave careful if you're.

[B]

Walking by someone sewing.

[C]

Yeah, that's exactly right. It's your grandmother knitting cross the street.

[A]

If Betsy Ross comes across you.

[C]

That's exactly right. She's making a flag. It's a fact. You do not want that. Anyway, so just keep your eyes open. The news will tell you. Every once in a while, it's like, you know, it's never a bad idea to learn how to protect yourself. And in the worst case scenario, if you do have to fight, boy, it's a good idea to learn to punch and learn to defend yourself. Learn how to defend against something crazy. Crazy's out there. Not saying it's going to happen to you, but if it did, would you know what to do? Become a sheepdog. Stop being a sheep and do it for 89 bucks for an entire month of training. That is outstanding. Reactdefense.com. that's the home of tactical Black Brady Entertainment.

[B]

Ghile Maxwell once said she saw Paris Hilton at a party and said, oh, my gosh, who's that? Someone introduced me to. Should be perfect for Jeffrey.

[C]

She said that?

[B]

Yes. Paris asked her about him. She. I have no memory of it.

[C]

Course not.

[B]

I don't even remember even meeting Maxwell. And she goes, I'm such a good clickbait name. Anyway. But Paris did meet her. There was a photograph of them together at a 2000. 2000 party in 2000.

[C]

But so what?

[B]

Yeah, it's old enough. Jelaine Maxwell, Trump and someone else.

[C]

Yeah, but they're old enough. And the dude hadn't been caught yet.

[B]

And how many. If you're going out to these socialite parties, a lot.

[C]

Look, I'm talking anybody who says their name is Jiz Lane. Yeah, that's. That's a full 10 minute conversation, at least for me. And then later you find out, oh, my God, they're sex traffickers. I didn't know that.

[A]

She said she'd be perfect for Jeffrey until he's seen the video and says, no, no, no, I'm out. I'm out.

[C]

No, nothing.

[A]

I'm out.

[C]

Yeah, even on that one, you're like, yeah, Jeff, skip this. Yeah, but I'm a pervert. I know. Trust me.

[B]

Joe Rogan top the list for Apple Podcasts in 2025.

[C]

Clobbered it too. Huge numbers are incredible.

[B]

The newest show that has is. That's number one. Is good. Hang with Amy Poehler.

[C]

What do you mean it's number one? I thought Rogan was number one.

[B]

Rogan's number one overall, but they said the one that has picked up the most over the year.

[C]

Oh, you said it was also number one.

[B]

Newest.

[C]

Oh, that's right. Newest one on the list. Yeah. Okay. It's not number one, though.

[B]

No.

[C]

Okay, fair. It's past 10, Brett.

[B]

Martha Stewart shilling away for Snoop Dogg and Dr. Dre's gin. G I n. She's making drinks with it to promote it. And her favorite one is called the water. Melly. She's.

[C]

Stop it. I didn't do anything. Do the next story. No, I'm interested without you laughing at us.

[B]

Anyway, that's one of the recipes.

[A]

What is the recipe?

[B]

It's fresh watermelon juice, gin, lime juice, cucumber bitters.

[C]

What's so funny?

[B]

Cane syrup, chesle dazzle.

[C]

Come on, grow up. Snoop Dogg tells you, grow up. Act like an is a dead dog. That's how he'd say adult is Nate.

[B]

Bar officially announced yesterday at a conference that he's moving forward to create Nateland, Nashville's first theme park in almost 30 years.

[C]

He's building a fun park about himself.

[B]

100 acres focused on good, clean family fun. And it's called Nateland.

[C]

Okay. He's done that. Well, he can build a fun park. I asked Frank that the other night. I'm like, hey, Kelly, you know how much do you make making a arena show? One of these guys that does these basketball. He said it yesterday too. Actually, here. It's like 4 or 5 million. I'm like, no kidding? So Coy's gonna pull 4 million this weekend. He said maybe. That's crazy.

[A]

He's not coming to see us.

[C]

No, that's what I want. And I'm happy for him if you're getting 4 million. He did 22 shows in a row in Hawaii. Sold out every show. So you're talking, you know, seven, eight, nine million dollars complete for that because it wasn't a huge list, but still, that's.

[B]

Eminem filed a petition to cancel the U. S. Trademark of an Australian beach brand called swim shady because it sounds so similar.

[C]

Well, sure.

[B]

We slipknot officially sold majority stake their music catalog.

[C]

How much?

[B]

120 million.

[C]

Nice job, Corey, man. The rest. Yeah, yeah. That's great. That's huge. Good on you, Slipknot and they still.

[B]

Have a mini catalog left, I guess.

[C]

Chisel Dazzle. Talk about my melons. My melon gin is good.

[A]

Supporting it.

[C]

Watermelon gin. Brett, what's so funny?

[B]

I support.

[C]

Is designed. It is a complete passive aggressive move by Dre and Snoop to do that to make people like Brett, like laugh. Yo, man, what you laughing at? And it works matter. I can't have a glass of watermelon. Jen.

[B]

Chisel.

[C]

Brett. Brett, don't let us not have nothing. Can I have a. You could really taste a watermelon. Brett, what's so funny? That's right. I'm leaving. I know. I'm with you. That's it. We're done. Larry's coming up next. He's going to give you chance after chance to win thousands of dollars. Dollars. It's Larry's excellent adventure and he'll tell you all about it in just a little bit. Also, Larry's going to give you a chance to try to win every ticket available to you through the 98 KUPD. It's a golden ticket program. It's basically we're going to give you tickets to every KUPD show that exists in 2026. Larry's gonna have information on how you can do that as well. It's pretty awesome. You guys want to see every big rock concert that comes to the Valley next year? Okay, the KUPD concert pass is yours. Larry talks about that next. We'll see you tomorrow in the morning sickness. It's out of control now. 98. Okay. You pt hey, this is Sarah. Look, I'm standing out front of a.m. p.m. Right now and well, you're sweet and all, but I found something more fulfilling. Even kind of cheesy. But I like it. Sure, you met some of my dietary needs, but they've just got it all so far. Well, oatmeal the long use trip strange soggy break up with bland breakfast and taste AM PM's bacon, egg and cheese biscuit made with K tree eggs, smoked bacon and melty cheese on a buttery biscuit AMPM too much good stuff.