11-21-25 - Guad Squares - Smokey Robinson And Shannon Sharpe - JFK - Trump - Billy Bob Thornton - Deaf Brady - OJ - Frank And Sly Stallone

Summary

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Holmberg’s Morning Sickness: Guad Squares – Smokey Robinson & Shannon Sharpe, JFK, Trump, Billy Bob Thornton, Deaf Brady, OJ, Frank and Sly Stallone

Date: November 21, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Special Episode: The Guadalupe Squares – with celebrity impersonations and irreverent comedy

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Episode Overview

This episode of "Holmberg's Morning Sickness" is the show’s signature comedic panel game, "The Guadalupe Squares." Think "Hollywood Squares" with satirical impersonations, wild banter, and tongue-in-cheek humor focusing on skewering pop culture, politics, sports, and themselves. Characters featured include Shannon Sharpe, Smokey Robinson, JFK, Donald Trump, Billy Bob Thornton, OJ Simpson, “Deaf” Brady, Frank & Sly Stallone, and more. The squares are filled with improvised parodies, edgy jokes, and a touch of chaos, all in the show’s typical irreverent spirit.

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Key Segments & Discussion Points

Opening Banter & Weekend Plans (01:27–03:24)

• Sports Talk: The guys run down their weekend sports viewing, poking fun at NFL matchups (“Raiders vs. Browns. What a barn burner. Seven vs. two and eight. This is going to be great stuff.” — Holmberg, 02:14).
• Call-back Jokes: Holmberg laments Corey not listening to his appearance mentioned on the Dan Patrick Show, sparking playful back-and-forth teasing.

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The Guadalupe Squares Begin

Top Left: Club Shay Shay with Shannon Sharpe & Smokey Robinson (03:31–05:10, 21:24–24:49)

• Shannon Sharpe (parody) launches into his signature “Club Shay Shay” persona—energetic theme song, ribbing and jokes about sexual harassment accusations, and celebrity drama.
• Smokey Robinson joins as the “other sexual assaulter” in the bit, leading to wild, raunchy song parodies and comedic call/response between the two.
• Notable Quote:
  • “Women’s general, they say, they say, Shannon, you done licked me like a salt lick. Against my will. And I said no, I didn’t… Now you got Smokey after the M to the O to the KTE…” — “Shannon Sharpe” (04:00)
  • “If there’s a smile on my face, I’m gonna put it between your legs.” – “Smokey Robinson” (22:07–22:21)

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Top Middle: JFK Remembers the Assassination (05:10–06:48, 25:23–26:20)

• Dark Humor: The JFK impersonation centers on Thanksgiving memories, blending food jokes with macabre assassination references.
• Family Traditions: “Don’t forget to have your annual traditional cherry pie with the back blown out of it.” – “JFK” (05:18)
• Conspiracy Theories: “I saw the bullet coming. You cannot see things from behind. I got hit in the throat twice. How do you do that from the back?” (06:11)
• Comedic Resignation: Talks about re-enacting the infamous moment with cranberry sauce and pink dresses.

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Top Right: Donald Trump (Impersonation) (06:48–08:39, 16:26–18:52)

• Bragging Rights: Trump’s impersonator boasts about being the best and toughest president because he “got shot and lived,” mocking JFK.
• Put-downs & Braggadocio:
  • “I don’t like the pussy presidents that cry and whine about it with their brains everywhere.” (06:55)
• Jokes about RFK and Kennedy Family: “Both the Kennedy boys—very weak compared to me.” (07:21)
• Game Play: Plays along with panel questions, riffing on Italians (“pistanthrophobia”) and fake trivia.
• Memorable Moment:
  • “You ever get shot in the head? I have... What did Kennedy do? His wife... that’s Jackie, ‘help!’ I didn’t ever say Melania, I said fight fight fight!” (07:12)
  • “I love Italians, okay? I know Brett. I don’t fear Brett. I don’t have any fear of any man. I’m not even afraid of projectiles.” (18:10)

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Middle Left: Billy Bob Thornton (& Sam Elliott) (08:39–09:41)

• Deadpan Absurdity: Billy Bob touts his new TV show (“Landman”) and reveals a fake “Boxmasters box set” which is just pictures of women he’s “nailed.”
• Impressions: Includes quick Sam Elliott impression (“Miho”)—the “same exact voice twice.”
• Running Gag: Joke about Columbia House/Publishers Clearing House-style monthly box sets.

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Center: “Deaf” Brady (09:47–10:59, 19:14–20:45)

• Physical Comedy: Running joke about not being able to hear anything (“What? What? Wa wa.”), and attempts to do a hard-of-hearing podcast.
• Quote: “The best thing about having no hearing...and that Toledo is just a figure that walks in a room and opens his mouth and I don’t hear it…” (10:20)
• Panel Game: Mishears trivia questions, responds with deadpan one-word “what?” answers.

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Middle Right: OJ Simpson (11:04–12:42)

• Bronco Nostalgia: OJ (impersonation) jokes about using John’s Bronco as a getaway vehicle.
• Meta Murder Jokes:
  • “During my murdering years. He (Thriller) would have been an easy kill... Like a lion on a zebra.” (11:19)
  • “You can just go around in that Bronco and, you know, scare the hell out of white women. Pop up out of the backseat like it’s Halloween every day.” (11:46)
• References to Evidence Hiding: Bits about glove compartments, Cato Kaelin, and not needing gloves.

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Bottom Left: Brady’s Secret Square – Billy the Kid (12:46–13:13)

• Quick Identifiable Gag: Billy the Kid (impersonation) clues listeners to guess his real name, then backpedals. Jokes about Pat Garrett and Young Guns.

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Bottom Middle: Frank and Sylvester Stallone (Impersonations) (13:17–15:17)

• Sibling Rivalry: “Frank Stallone” talks about earning 18 cents in song royalties for “Far From Over”; Sylvester Stallone pops in to dismiss his brother.
• Jabs at Fame: “Go get the chicken, Frankie. Gotta stay outside. Just one more Thriller.” (14:22)
• Supporting Cast: Old “Mickey” from Rocky makes a cameo with classic lines.

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Bottom Right: “Trip Reeb” (station general manager, as Lord & Savior) (15:20–16:03)

• In-Jokes: Trip presides as the “Lord and Savior,” giving tongue-in-cheek “approval” and job security to the hosts (“That’s why you’re a good write-off, kid.” (16:00))

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The Squares Game Play (16:03–26:28)

• Contestants “Carrie” and “Josh” battle in the classic tic-tac-toe format, picking impersonation-filled squares and answering/agreeing/disagreeing with absurd trivia.
• Running Gags:
  • “JFK” continually references his assassination.
  • “Club Shay Shay” and “Smokey Robinson” ramp up with crude song parodies.
  • “Trump” and “Billy Bob” crack exaggerated jingoist or macho jokes.
  • “Deaf Brady” mangles questions and can’t hear any answers.

Sample Q&A Highlights:

• Trump Square Q: “Pisanthrophobia is a fear of Italian people. True or false?”
  • “Trump” says: “I love Italians… I don’t fear any man. Not even projectiles shot from guns at my head or from Bill Clinton’s wang. I’ve taken them both.” (18:10)
• Brady/Deaf Square Q: “Pirates wore eye patches so their eyes could easily adjust to light changes…”
  • “Brady” riffs on pirates and having no hearing, then says “Pirates wore an iPad so they could look through the telescope.” (20:37)
• Club Shay Shay/Smokey Robinson Q: “Men who kiss their wives before leaving for work live an average of five years longer.”
  • “Smokey Robinson” sings a crude improvisation.
  • “That’s the true. Who cares? Kiss a bitch whenever you feel like it. That’s what I say.” (25:03)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

On Kennedy’s Assassination:

• “Don’t forget to have your annual traditional cherry pie with the back blown out of it.” — “JFK” (05:18)
• “I was there. I saw the bullet coming. You cannot see things from behind. I got hit in the throat twice. How do you do that from the back?” — “JFK” (06:11)

On Trump Taking a Bullet:

• “I said, fight, fight, fight. What did Kennedy do? His wife… that’s Jackie, ‘help!’… I just said, fight, fight, fight. Makes me a better president.” — “Trump” (07:12)

On Club Shay Shay & Smokey Robinson:

• “If there’s a smile on my face, I’m gonna put it between your legs.” — “Smokey Robinson” (22:07)
• “If an 83-year-old man on top of you winning, just lay back and take it.” — “Shannon Sharpe” (22:51)

OJ’s Classic Bronco Bits:

• “You can just go around in that Bronco and, you know, scare the hell out of white women. I’ll pop up out of the backseat like it’s Halloween every day.” — “OJ” (11:46)

Frank & Sly’s Sibling Rivalry:

• “He made 18 cents this morning on the show because you guys played his song…” — “Frank Stallone” (13:21)
• “Go get the chicken, Frankie. Gotta stay outside.” — “Sly Stallone” (14:22)

Deaf Brady on Not Hearing Colleagues:

• “The best thing about having no hearing… and that Toledo is just a figure that walks in a room and opens his mouth and I don’t hear it…” (10:20)

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Closing Banter (26:22–28:06)

• Contest winners are announced; both Carrie & Josh receive prizes.
• Random food talk: Thanks to “Ranch House Grill” for breakfast.
• Brady “goes deaf” again as food is served, setting up a classic show-ending laugh.

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Noteworthy Timed Highlights

• 03:31–05:10: The wild Club Shay Shay opening feat. Shannon Sharpe & introduction of “Smokey Robinson.”
• 05:10–06:48: JFK’s Thanksgiving assassination parody.
• 06:48–08:39: Trump’s shootout with JFK and improv about surviving bullets.
• 11:04–12:42: OJ Simpson’s bizarre Bronco confessions and murder allusions.
• 13:17–15:17: Frank and Sly Stallone’s sibling banter about royalties.
• 21:24–24:49: Smokey Robinson’s raunchy song improv on Club Shay Shay.
• 25:23–26:20: JFK on how long it takes to fall to the earth’s core.

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Tone & Signature Style

The episode is frenetic, irreverent, and loaded with parody—never shying from dark, taboo, or self-referential humor. Impersonations are intentionally over-the-top, and improv lines blur the line between character and actor. The team constantly plays off each others’ jokes, riffing and escalating one-liners, with a healthy dose of audience participation and callbacks to classic HMS bits.

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For New Listeners: What to Expect

If you haven’t heard Holmberg’s Guadalupe Squares:

• Expect rapid-fire, adult satire—think SNL’s Weekend Update meets Howard Stern.
• Frequent roasting of pop culture, celebrities (especially notorious ones), and even the hosts themselves.
• Recurring bits and characters that reward regular listeners but welcome new ears with outrageous humor.

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Skip the salad, but don’t skip the Squares!

Transcript

[Shannon Holmberg]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by mmpguns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Commercial Announcer]

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[Corey]

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[Shannon Holmberg]

Can I make my site firmer? Can we sleep cooler? Sleep number does that cools up to.

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[Shannon Holmberg]

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[Corey]

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[Shannon Holmberg]

Morning sickness? Morning sickness. It's Friday. We got Joe Coy tickets in our hands. We want to get rid of those. We're going to have people online doing that in just a second, but we need our host Corey to take us through this. How are you?

[Corey]

Thriller? I'm doing all right. About yourself?

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'm doing well. Thanks for asking. Are you a busy weekend?

[Corey]

I got a couple games.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yeah. That doesn't mean you're doing anything. Raiders are playing.

[Corey]

Yeah. On Sunday.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Patriots. Who do they have this week? You don't know?

[Corey]

I played on Monday, so I'm not sure.

[Shannon Holmberg]

And then what is the other one? NAU Football.

[Corey]

NAU Football. Yes. They have their last game of the season this weekend. Unless they do good enough to get selected for postseason.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Right. And. And their rival is Wyoming.

[Corey]

They have a lot.

[Brady]

But.

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Is that what their plans?

[Corey]

It's Red Rock Battle. Yeah, that's what they call it. Yeah. Red Rock rivalry.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Raiders are playing the Browns. Oh, Raiders. Browns. What a barn burner. Seven versus two and eight. This is going to be great stuff.

[Commercial Announcer]

What's the channel again?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yeah, listen to that live on kdos. Where the deuce hits the fan.

[Corey]

We have not used that in a long time.

[Shannon Holmberg]

The deuce and the fan were both names of it at one point.

[Corey]

Oh, I know.

[Shannon Holmberg]

When they changed it from the fan to the deuce, I said they should call it the Deuce Hit the Fan. And they didn't think that was funny at all. I did, though. It doesn't matter now.

[Corey]

It's the sports locker, just 1063.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, that's right. They just. They don't even use words. Did you hear Dan Patrick show yesterday?

[Corey]

I did, yes.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Kelly Endo was on there. Did you hear?

[Corey]

What?

[Shannon Holmberg]

He was talking about me the whole time. Really? You didn't hear that?

[Corey]

I didn't hear the full segment, no.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Damn it, Corey. You don't even listen. And you're the only one in there.

[Corey]

Three hours show. I can't catch every second of it.

[Shannon Holmberg]

But the only one in there. You stay the whole time anyway. What are you gonna do? I was all over Dan Patrick yesterday.

[Corey]

Was he telling the Shatner story or.

[Shannon Holmberg]

He talked about Shatner. He talked about. He was just overly kind to me. And it got back to me all day. And then, of course, Frank, not wanting to be outdone by people letting me know they heard it, text me. He goes, I talked about you a ton on Dan Patrick today. I'm like, thanks, Frank. Do I owe you money or anything?

[Corey]

I framed you for the murder. You're welcome.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Exactly. Kind of felt like that. Anyway, it's time for your Guadalupe squares. Here's your host, Thriller Wall.

[Corey]

Thank you, Chancellor.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Let's dig in.

[Corey]

Top left square. We're staying over at Club Shay Shay right now. What's going on here?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Hit the button. Hit the button. Hit the. There we are. Welcome to Club Chase. This is my theme song. This is my. This my theme song. This my theme song. This here. Welcome to the spot. I'm Shannon Chop, your today guest. Other sexual harassers start with Smoker Robinson.

[Corey]

You need to hit a button on this.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I don't know. I didn't hear. I did. I skip, skip, skip, skip. A bunch of white guys. There's curse word. There's curse word in club. Club Shay. Ain't got no cursing. Ain't got none of that. Today's guest, if you pick the square, Moy Robinson. S to the M to the O to the. Because we both have a lot in common. Women's be saying we done terrible things we ain't done. Women's general. They say, they say, they say, Shannon, you done licked me like a salt lick. Against my will. And I said no, I didn't know the thing. Say, jj, get the club. Now you got Smokey after the M to the O to the KTE to.

[Corey]

The Y.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I did it. Word, word. Brady. Like Club Shay Shay, Andy Richter hang around. That's right. All right. Club Shay Shay, come back, pick my squares, meet smoke at Robinson. Problems we don't need to continue.

[Brady]

That's it.

[Corey]

All right, up next now, top middle square, jfk.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I. I'm celebrating quite an anniversary this weekend. Happy Thanksgiving. That I'll never see again. Don't forget to have your annual traditional cherry pie with the back blown out of it.

[Corey]

Yep.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Splattered all over the countertop. We do cranberry sauce. You do cranberry? Or any sort of blood related colored project.

[Corey]

Drop it on the counter.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Just throw it out of the can and let it leak.

[Corey]

Yes.

[Shannon Holmberg]

And that is pouring one out for the homie.

[Corey]

How do you pay tribute to Jackie?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Scooping it up. She. That's. She dresses in a pink dress and scoops it back onto your plate with her hands.

[Corey]

You got to wear pink.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I. Yes. You wear pink for Thanksgiving at the Kennedy house and you recreate the moment culinarily.

[Commercial Announcer]

Yes. Full.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Full food related.

[Corey]

Dress up as all the bystanders.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Exactly. The man with the umbrella, the guy in the window, and of course, well, the quote unquote assassin with a Wilshire.

[Corey]

You don't believe it either.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I was there. I saw the bullet coming. You cannot see things from behind. I got hit in the throat twice. How do you do that from the back? Well, I was very curious about the movie that used to have the curved bullets with Angelina Jolie, by the way. If I was still alive, I would have nailed that. In fact, even dead, I think I could get a. I need Lee Harvey. You are a madman. I need your Thanksgiving jokes like I need a hole in the head.

[Corey]

What? What? Over now to the top right, Squ. Another president. President Trump. How are you, sir?

[Commercial Announcer]

You know what?

[Shannon Holmberg]

I like presidents who have been shot and lived. I'm one of those. I'm one of those. I don't like those two of you.

[Corey]

And Teddy.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Well, you know, there's a couple of. Teddy. Teddy Roosevelt took one and Reagan got hit. But I like presidents who get shot and live. I don't like the pussy presidents that cry and whine about it with their brains everywhere.

[Corey]

You still give RFK a chance.

[Shannon Holmberg]

RFK was never president.

[Corey]

No, what I'm saying is, like, you didn't let the family line die out with jfk.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Well, no, because they're survivors. Both the Kennedy boys. Very weak towards compared to me. Eh, it's very true. Am I wrong, Brett?

[Corey]

No.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I mean, I would love to argue this point, but he's right. There is no argument here. That's right. I stood there and got a bigger bullet, by the way. You were shot with a baby gun. A little tiny character. Found your slug. Oh, it was a. Might have been a pellet in AR15. Shooter got clobbered by one of the biggest rifles you can get hit by. And I stood up. And what did I do? I said, fight, fight, fight. What did Kennedy do? His wife. That's Jackie. Help. I didn't ever say Melania. I just said fight, fight, fight. Makes me a better president than Kennedy, I think. And we've already determined. Yeah, but you blew Clinton. That's not proven. Quiet, Piggy.

[Corey]

There's a lot of. There's a lot of bubbles.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Either way, it was a party down on the island that nobody talks about. Clinton. Or a legendary. A lot of people say I am a horse. It's a big one. I'm not gonna lie, Bubba. I've been shot in the head twice by Bubba and once by a stranger. Still standing. Fight, fight, fight. That's right. Try to take me down. You can't do it. Bullets. And like Superman, unlike Kennedy, whose head's made of balloons or paper mache just explodes.

[Corey]

All right, over now to the middle of square. Billy Bob Thornton joining us.

[Shannon Holmberg]

What the hell's going on around here? But just watch Landman. It's got a new guy in it. Did you see the guys in it with me? Have you been watching Brady?

[Corey]

I haven't, but I probably start watching on the billboard.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'm sure it's pretty great. But you got. Sam Elliott's in it with me and he's here right now. Come on in here, Sam. They're going me home. That's exactly right. Almost the exact same lot of dude juice. There's a bunch of. There's 150 years of dude juice experience on Landman this year. Isn't that right, Sam? You know it. Me? Oh, see, it's. All you got to do is the same voice. Just turn it up louder and say Miho. You got a twofer. Nailed it there, Mio. Told you. It's the same exact thing. Anyway, I'm also selling my Boxmasters box set. And that's just pictures of bitches I've nailed. It's not even music.

[Corey]

How many.

[Shannon Holmberg]

It's almost like Publishers clearing.

[Corey]

Or not.

[Shannon Holmberg]

That was that the Columbia house?

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Just one a month for the rest of your life for a penny. And you're just going to get a picture of a box you can't believe. I nailed and I nailed it. It's good stuff, I'll tell you that.

[Corey]

Is it before or after?

[Shannon Holmberg]

After. Miho, that's exactly right. It's the same exact voice twice. All right, keep it going.

[Corey]

Oh, no worries. Now over to center square. Hard of hearing, Brady, can you hear us?

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Corey]

Yeah.

[Shannon Holmberg]

No.

[Corey]

You're hard of hearing. Is that right?

[Brady]

I'm hard on too.

[Corey]

What? No, no, you're not hard. Brady, are you hard of hearing?

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

I'm gonna say what? That's always the one.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Wawa wa wa.

[Corey]

You got that right.

[Brady]

Wa wa.

[Corey]

You got him on that one.

[Brady]

That's why I can't talk to him because I'm congested and I don't hear very well. But I think I. Hi boys.

[Commercial Announcer]

Hi.

[Brady]

I sound the same.

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Corey]

I don't think so.

[Brady]

The best thing about having no hearing.

[Corey]

Uh huh.

[Brady]

And that Toledo is just a figure that walks in a room and opened his mouth and I don't hear it again. I'm gonna do a podcast for people who have hard of hearing.

[Corey]

Okay, good luck.

[Brady]

Yeah, I don't know if it's a great idea, but it's called Blady Bogan.

[Corey]

What?

[Brady]

And I'll be talking about how hard it is to deal with everyday life without hearing.

[Corey]

That'll be a terrible interview.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Who's your first guest?

[Brady]

What?

[Corey]

What?

[Brady]

What? Blaine on. And we're gonna do an impression of this eagle from Nemo.

[Commercial Announcer]

What?

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

What? What?

[Corey]

All right, now over to the middle right square OJ joining us once again.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Hello there, Thriller.

[Corey]

Hi there. You sound excited about that juice.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'm sorry, I didn't know what Thrillers. You know, type of person doesn't like OJ for all sorts of reasons. During football. During my career in football. Yeah, there's no way he'd have caught me.

[Corey]

No one could have, man.

[Shannon Holmberg]

During my murdering years. He would have been an easy kill. Like a. Like a lion in a zebra. I would have taken you down so fast. Of course, then again, you probably would have been another 15 to 20 minutes away from Nicole's house to drop off those sunglasses, that is. But an able bodied guy got there in a reasonable amount of time. Anyway, I saw John's Bronco again. I was out there. Man, that thing is nice. I laid down in the back, I checked out the wig and gun compartment. I don't even know if he has that. But it's got a nice hiding spot there. You can just go around in that Bronco and, you know, scare the hell out of white women. I'll pop up out of the backseat like it's Halloween every day.

[Corey]

I have seen so many broncos around here since.

[Shannon Holmberg]

So many. It's a lot. There's a lot of people. It's called the getaway car. It's the best getaway car I've ever had.

[Corey]

Blood. And John's bronco.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I think it comes with that. I think it comes with the glove box. I ain't got no need for gloves, Brett. I thought too. Snitches get stitches wrestling. I'm just saying, glove box. That's a good one. Everybody knows when you're done with gloves, you just chuck them at the guest house. That's crazy talk. Put them in the glove box. But you know how fast Bill of Van Adder would have found my gloves if I took the glove box literally.

[Corey]

Glove box's name is Cato.

[Shannon Holmberg]

That's like having a gun box or a blonde head box. I mean, ridiculous. You can find all the evidence. If I was with you. Jesus Christ. Anyway. And I can take his name in vain, because I'm never gonna meet him anyway. All right. I'm just saying.

[Corey]

All right, now over to the bottomless square. Brady's secret square. Give us a hint.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Morning, gents. Now get your hands up.

[Brady]

This is a stick up.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'm Billy the Kid.

[Corey]

Oh, that.

[Shannon Holmberg]

But I want you to guess my real name.

[Corey]

You pussies.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Gave away the game, and then he took it back. Wow.

[Corey]

Nice save.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Green horns sucking and jiving. You're like Pat Garrett.

[Corey]

Over. Now, this guy shot me.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I just remembered his name. I just remember. I don't. You don't remember it from Young Guns?

[Commercial Announcer]

You don't remember?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. He sold it, too. So let's see if anybody remembers. All right, go ahead.

[Commercial Announcer]

Over.

[Corey]

Now, bottom, middle, square, we have Frank and Sylvester still over the gallery.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You know, I'm so proud of my brother. He made 18 cents this morning on the show because you guys played his song Far from over to start the show.

[Corey]

Royalty.

[Shannon Holmberg]

He's outside. We want to go get him.

[Corey]

Yeah. Yeah.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

Good morning.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Hey, you know, stay outside there.

[Corey]

What?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, come on.

[Corey]

Let him come in.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Let me. Come on in.

[Brady]

Come on. A little bit.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You know, he's all right out there. He's gonna sing by the trash can or something. Don't bother. He's a bum. Exactly. You know, Mickey will tell you he's nothing. Give another 18 cents, you're nothing.

[Brady]

Play my song again.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Get out of here. Frankie, come on. You know they want the stars. You know, you stand outside and sing outside by the trash can.

[Corey]

Well, Yogi looks up to him, though.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Hey, yo, Yogi Falcone. He could be in my next movie.

[Brady]

You know I want to be in the next movie.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Hey, come on, Frank. I already give you your shot. Get out of here, you dumb. Thanks a lot, Mick. It's so good to have. Mick was having an unexpected. Mickey was a treat.

[Corey]

He's in your suitcase.

[Shannon Holmberg]

He just hangs around, you know, just always around.

[Brady]

I can always be around.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yeah, you know I wouldn't be around. Frankie, you gotta stay outside. Go get the chicken, Frankie. Gotta stay outside. Just one more Thriller.

[Corey]

I know. It's all right over now. Unless we're getting royalty.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, yo, you guys are gonna do this again? He needs another 18 seconds. Third cents. Come here.

[Brady]

Sing it for me.

[Corey]

18 seconds is a lot. We'll see.

[Brady]

Come on. Let me sing it out loud. Let me sing.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Get out of here. Frankie. Look at the song.

[Corey]

Why does it look like Zoolander make 36? Well, now, welcome to the show.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You make 36 cents today. All right. Becky, last night.

[Brady]

Hey, come on, give me something.

[Shannon Holmberg]

No perky. Come on. You don't do it. Gotta have the studio. You on Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Corey]

All right, let's get a real professional in here. Bottom right square. Our Lord and Savior, Trip Reeb.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Hello, sir. I mean, Thriller. If you're not listening to kdos.

[Corey]

I was busy working on something that's.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Like John saying he's not listening to Holmberg's morning sickness while he's doing it.

[Corey]

For what it's worth, Brady doesn't.

[Brady]

I can't hear it. I haven't listened to it the whole good one.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I know, but, man, I mean, Brett, in fairness, you've been cutting his legs out from under him ever since he's been on the show. He's allowed to take a dig back. Good one. Brilliant. Now, but again, it's sort of my Make a Wish station. I do it for you. If you don't want it, I'll just turn it off.

[Corey]

No, no, I need a job.

[Shannon Holmberg]

All right. Well, that's why you're a good write off kid.

[Corey]

That's right.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yeah. And here's your adorable blanket. Cover yourself up there. Nice job. Who's on the phone? Kerry and Josh. Kerry, are you there? I'm here. Josh, are you there? I'm here. All right, Carrie, you go first. Pick a square. Alrighty. I'm gonna go with Trump this morning.

[Corey]

All right, great.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Great pick, Gary. Excellent job. You know, I've never. I've been shot, Gary, and I'm still here. Unlike Ken. Did you see the difference between me getting shot and Kennedy getting shot? I mean, one. One was clearly a big pussy and the other one was me. You ever get shot in the head? I have. I don't know that. He was there talking to you.

[Brady]

When are you talking to me?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, nobody's talking to Brady right now. Looking at the blank stare, Mickey just shows up. He's just intermittent. Nick. Mickey.

[Corey]

I would really like it if Mickey.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Said more than one line. Mickey's sort of a one trick pony. You're a cock. There he is. Gotcha. He gotcha. Anyway, Mickey was shot and died, I think, in the Rocky movies. I don't remember, but he didn't make it. Didn't make it. I'm one of the presidents that did. I got shot and just. I had a meeting the next day. Pretty great. I think getting shot and living is very impressive, isn't it? Love it, don't they? What's her name again? Yeah, that's recess. She answered and I don't even know her name. Don't even have to know Carrie's name. Don't even have to know. You know what Carrie will never have to do?

[Corey]

What's that?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Carry my brains off the back of a limousine. Just like Kennedy's wife. Exactly. That was disgusting. You guys are both pigs for laughing. All right, go ahead.

[Corey]

Question for you here, sir. Pisanthrophobia is a fear of Italian people. True or false?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Pistanthrophobia. What?

[Corey]

No, no, no. Pisanthropy.

[Shannon Holmberg]

By the way. What a movie. Carrie. What a movie. Did you ever see the movie Carrie that you're named after? It reminded me a lot of. What does it remind me? Kennedy's assassination. So much blood. And mine? Not so much. A lot of blood, but a lot of standing and a lot of yelling. Good things. I'll say. Pistent throwbia. Is that what I'm saying? Am I saying you're not even close.

[Corey]

That's all right.

[Shannon Holmberg]

But it's being afraid of Italians. I love Italians, okay? I've known several Italians. I know Brett. Brett's an Italian. I know Brett. You don't fear Brett. I don't have any fear of any man. I'm not even afraid of projectiles shot from guns at my head or from nevermind I don't give. Or from Bill Clinton's wang. I've taken them both. Taking them both in stride. I'll say that's probably false. I don't think there is such a thing as fear of Italians. They're very weak people. Never won a war like me. I've won very many wars. A lot. Just this year, stopped a lot. Won a lot. Gonna beat up Venezuela next. They're no good.

[Corey]

Oh, okay.

[Shannon Holmberg]

So Pistanthrophobia is not a fear of the Italians because there's no reason to fear them. They surrender. They surrender. They're the other. If it weren't for the French, they'd be the surrender monkeys. Okay, go ahead.

[Corey]

Okay, you're saying false there. Now, Kerry, do you agree or disagree with false?

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'm gonna agree. Correct.

[Corey]

X gets the square.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You gotta have a lot of brains to answer these questions. Kennedy. I don't like him any more than you do.

[Corey]

Over to Josh here. Make your selection. Let's do hard of hearing, Brady.

[Brady]

Okay.

[Shannon Holmberg]

What? What?

[Brady]

Can I come to you house?

[Corey]

I want you to bang, bang.

[Brady]

Oh, man. Come on.

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

Bang, bang. I see that gun come out. Oh, boy.

[Corey]

It's an eyewitness.

[Brady]

An eyewitness? It was an ear witness.

[Corey]

No, it's an eyewitness.

[Brady]

You seen a guy on the news that's been putting his ear up against people's windows?

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

That's me trying to figure out what's going on in there.

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

I lost my hearing this week.

[Corey]

All right, now look at my lips.

[Brady]

When I ask you this, little man.

[Corey]

If it makes you focus, then whatever.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brady]

Can he think? Watch my. Read my dick.

[Shannon Holmberg]

He said focus.

[Brady]

Oh, all of us.

[Commercial Announcer]

No, no.

[Corey]

F, F. Oh.

[Brady]

Oh, I'm sorry. All right, go ahead.

[Corey]

Pirates wore eye patches so their eyes could easily adjust to light changes above and below a day.

[Brady]

I can't wear an iPad. And that would become Helen Cowell, officially.

[Corey]

Wait, what? Wear two of them. How does that work? I don't think you know how it works.

[Shannon Holmberg]

IPad.

[Brady]

Can you.

[Corey]

Don't tell me.

[Brady]

Oh, hi. I, I, E, A, I, E, O, U.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yes.

[Brady]

Pirates. I've watched a lot of pirate games and I don't think they wear them.

[Corey]

Okay.

[Brady]

I think the pirates were on iPads so they could look through the telescope.

[Corey]

Okay, I'll say that.

[Brady]

That.

[Corey]

All right, so you were saying false.

[Shannon Holmberg]

False.

[Corey]

Okay, so you're saying false. Now, Josh, do you agree or disagree with False?

[Shannon Holmberg]

I disagree.

[Corey]

Correct. Then sue gets the center.

[Commercial Announcer]

Oh, right.

[Brady]

Back to Jerry Hunter.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Who? He's guilty.

[Brady]

Hunter biden Hunter Biden is very guilty. I call him a hunter.

[Commercial Announcer]

What?

[Brady]

I don't think you're allowed to say that.

[Corey]

You want a puck. What?

[Brady]

Not in front of anybody, but yes.

[Corey]

All right, back to Carrie here. Make a choice.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Let's go with Smokey Robinson.

[Corey]

All right. Club Shay Shay.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Well, you need to.

[Corey]

You still got it.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You picked the Club Shayjay that did that time for Club Shay Shay. We're glad y' all here. Sit back, sit back now. Club Chase. Club. Listen, listen, Brady. Yeah, listen. I say, Brady, listen. It don't matter what. We're in Club jj. The special guest today, other sexual assaulter, Smoke Em Robinson. Smoke Em. Smoke them on your head.

[Brady]

How you guys?

[Shannon Holmberg]

How you doing?

[Brady]

I'm Smokey Robinson. Great to be on Club Chase.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Were you doing number four? Smoke them.

[Brady]

Yes, I will. I try not to sexually harass people, but sometimes. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah. If there's a smile on my face, I'm gonna put it between your legs.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You don't like me doing that?

[Brady]

I don't give a. No one can hear your cries. Oh, I love Club Shay Shay. Putting my fingers inside your booty.

[Shannon Holmberg]

That was brilliant. Thank you, Mogi. Oh, Smokem did a great job singing on Club JJ. 83 year old. You can't fight off an 83 year old man. Sexually, you deserve it.

[Corey]

All right, hopefully you have time for a Q and A here. Club Chaser.

[Shannon Holmberg]

That's a fact. You laugh at that. But if an 83 year old man on top of you winning, just lay back and take it. That's a bite to Club Chaser. Now, if a man who is the size of a horse like me, you can fight back, it ain't gonna do you no good. So just relax. Go ahead. I said relax.

[Corey]

No worries. Question for you here.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yep.

[Corey]

Men who kiss their wives before leaving for work live an average of five years longer.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I like to kiss other man's wives before they go to work.

[Corey]

How long do you live?

[Brady]

I kiss everybody's wife whether they like it or not.

[Corey]

Oh, my God.

[Brady]

I don't know this song. That was horrifying.

[Shannon Holmberg]

They say they kiss your wife. Kiss your wife. Kiss who? Wife. Kiss her wife.

[Corey]

Your wife?

[Commercial Announcer]

My wife.

[Corey]

The one you married.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Disgusting. You know her mouth? Have been.

[Corey]

You gonna tell us?

[Shannon Holmberg]

You guess? Get down. If you start. Let me put my finger on my chin. Skip to the chest. Skip to the belly. Skip to the pelvis. There you go.

[Corey]

There it is.

[Shannon Holmberg]

My wife liked to kiss me goodbye. Give me a little sugar. Really? Literally. Sugar cubes.

[Brady]

Baby. Let Me bruise you together.

[Corey]

Don't get physical.

[Brady]

Please let the professionals handle this. Don't be confused. My rape is clear.

[Corey]

I'm admitting the crime.

[Brady]

I've been bruising together. If you want it, you got it. Forever. Cause I'm inside of you after I knock your bitch ass out. I'm 83. You can't fight me. Then you deserve a what you get, which is this thing in your mouth. Say. Say. Touch my dick.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Get your hand off Ms. Mokum. Smokey put his hand on my. Smoke that. Smoke dick. Put your dick. Smoke him anyway.

[Brady]

We don't know the question. Okay?

[Corey]

Men who kiss their wives live an average of five years longer.

[Brady]

That's the true. Who cares? Kiss a bitch whenever you feel like it. That's what I say.

[Shannon Holmberg]

All right.

[Corey]

So you're saying true now. Carrie, do you agree or disagree with True.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'm gonna agree. Correct.

[Corey]

X gets the square.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Next one wins.

[Corey]

Next one wins.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Maybe the two.

[Corey]

Josh.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Jfk, please.

[Corey]

Jfk.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I love it. I am closing out Thanksgiving weekend. Just like I opened her up in 63. Don't drop the ball. Here we go, Doc. All right. Just practicing.

[Corey]

Quack.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I don't like being this close to a window on an upper floor. Triggers. I don't like saying triggers. You're from Boston. Not for the reasons that Brett thinks. All right, go ahead.

[Corey]

All right. It would take you about 36 minutes to fall to the center of the ear. True or false.

[Shannon Holmberg]

I wonder which would have been more painful. What actually happened to me or a hole to the middle. Speaking of holes to the middle. Watch out there, Smokey. I'll say. I think that's probably false. It would take a lot longer to travel to the center of the earth.

[Corey]

All right, you're saying false now. Josh. For the wind. Do you agree or disagree with false?

[Shannon Holmberg]

I'll agree. Correct.

[Corey]

Sorko gets it. You win.

[Shannon Holmberg]

They both get it. They both get it. We'll both give them prizes. Today went really late. Holy smokes. Did we ever.

[Corey]

Holy Robbie.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Holy Smokey Robinson. Somebody say Smokey Robinson. Holy Smokey. Holy Smokey Robinson. Oh, no, no.

[Brady]

This the same one as last time. I'm not.

[Corey]

Go away, man.

[Brady]

That's my new song called Bruising.

[Shannon Holmberg]

It's my.

[Commercial Announcer]

It's.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, no.

[Corey]

Baby. Yes.

[Shannon Holmberg]

A what?

[Corey]

No.

[Brady]

Please take my dick to your mind.

[Corey]

No, no, no.

[Brady]

Just release and you're fine.

[Corey]

The worst verse. It is.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You are right.

[Brady]

You're gonna fly away.

[Shannon Holmberg]

What?

[Brady]

Let's do some pelvic bruising together. Brady wrote that. Threw me off.

[Corey]

That's on your mind, Brady?

[Brady]

Get out.

[Shannon Holmberg]

All right, we're done. You're doing nonsense. I don't know why you think that. That's when I asked. That's when I asked you what you're doing for the weekend. It is rarely like what's kdos, but.

[Corey]

You give me play games on the weekend.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yeah, but what do you do?

[Corey]

I work on the weekend.

[Shannon Holmberg]

We need to get you out of this.

[Corey]

When do you have a day off then?

[Shannon Holmberg]

Do you?

[Corey]

It's up in the air. Is it?

[Brady]

What?

[Shannon Holmberg]

It's debatable.

[Corey]

It's pretty rare.

[Shannon Holmberg]

You're here every day, More or less.

[Corey]

It's getting better as of late. But there was a while there, man. It was a good, I think a year or two.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Are you a hostage? Jesus.

[Corey]

How about you ask Tripp that question?

[Brady]

Why don't you come over to my house?

[Corey]

Passive aggressive.

[Brady]

I love victims.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Come on over.

[Corey]

Oh, no, no, no.

[Brady]

Show you my tears of my penis.

[Corey]

Oh, will you let the man have a day off?

[Brady]

Tears in your brown. Write that down. That's good stuff.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Quick. Thanks to Ranch House grill this morning. 56th street and Thomas, they dropped off a bunch of breakfast and we crushed it. So thank you to Leland and the gang at Ranch House grill over there. 56 and Thomas. Yo.

[Corey]

Salad is untouched.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Yeah, they made a special salad for Brady considering and he veggie egg burrito. And you knocked that down instead of that.

[Commercial Announcer]

Smart.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Okay. There you go. Don't look at me. All we're just keeping an eye on you. Everybody cares. People care about you.

[Commercial Announcer]

Lunch.

[Shannon Holmberg]

But that's not good. I mean dessert, you can't have that in lunch. You can't eat the shell. You can't eat the shell. Yeah, that's bad for you. Don't do that.

[Corey]

Here it comes.

[Brady]

It's all right.

[Commercial Announcer]

It's all right.

[Brady]

Doctor says I'm good again.

[Shannon Holmberg]

Oh, boy. Here we go. Here we go. What? Yeah, that's right. Oh, conveniently, he went deaf when the food got here. Larry's coming up next. You guys have yourselves a great weekend. We'll see you for playo starting Monday. Yikes. It's powerful, Rocket. It's out of control now.