Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona – Nov 24, 2025

Episode: “PLAYDIO DAY ONE – Holmberg’s Morning Sickness 98 KUPD”

Summary by Segment with Key Quotes and Timestamps

Episode Overview

Theme:
It’s Day One of PLAYDIO, Holmberg’s annual battle of the (unsigned) bands, forming the backbone of the full show. John Holmberg (host) and his regular crew—Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo—sift through two dozen local band submissions, scoring, mocking, and bantering their way through Arizona’s best (and worst) musical hopefuls. The show blends biting humor with genuine commentary, raising the stakes for local music and capping things off with several standout tracks.

Key Segments, Discussions, and Takeaways

A. Sports Recap & Bidwill Controversy

[03:59–15:28]

• Armchair Quarterbacking: The hosts open with NFL and college football picks, lamenting their teams' losses or wins.
• Michael Bidwill Rumor:
  • Holmberg launches into a detailed, deadpan rant about seeing Michael Bidwill (Arizona Cardinals owner) at a Phoenix Suns game minutes after the Cardinals’ own game went to overtime.
  • The hosts speculate, with tongue-in-cheek seriousness, that Bidwill is checked out, possibly preparing to sell the team:
    • “If you're a fan of this team, and you see the owner doing something else during the game… My speculation is he's selling the team. He had to meet at the RahRah Room to somebody in Jacksonville with money's here.” (John Holmberg, 09:03)
  • The hosts poke fun at the Bidwill family’s “tourist” efforts to fit into Arizona, and contrast with exemplary hands-on owners like Jerry Jones.
• Fan Call-ins/Texts: Listener feedback pours in; most find Bidwill’s early departure offensive, some defend him with faulty analogies.

Memorable Quote:

“There’d be a ding dong the witch is dead party you can’t imagine, at all. I get more attention in the Rah Rah room from people who recognize me than Bidwill.” (Holmberg, 15:53)

B. Comedy, News & Brady Report

[28:43–44:09]

• Brady’s Oddball News & Factoids:
  • National Sardines Day, Louis Vuitton history, North Korea’s unpaid Volvos.
• Viral News:
  • Woman charged for pocketing a $20 bill at Walmart in PA, legal technicalities discussed.
• Wild, Wild World Segment:
  • Bald eagle in North Carolina drops a cat onto a moving car windshield—hosts riff on animal misfortune.
  • Ramen chef in Japan claims to have used judo on a bear in the kitchen—hosts suspect “affair cover-up.”
  • CableTV.com offering $2,500 to watch 25 Christmas movies.

Memorable Quote:

“That might be the worst day a cat has ever had... A bald eagle steals him. And then a car does!” (Holmberg, 37:00)

C. Playdio 2026: Unsigned Local Band Competition

[49:37–213:02]

1. Rules and Humor

• 40 unsigned bands submit one original song.
• Hosts listen, critique, and score each entry. Poor songs are “gonged” early via sound effects; best are marked for the finals.
• Top five advance to a live showdown; winner writes next year’s show theme and wins $2,000.

2. Early Frustration: The Parade of Mediocrity

• The show’s first hour is filled with “sloppy,” “dated,” or poorly produced entries.
• Too many bands have long intros; several get roasted for lacking rhythm, pitch, or even basic audio quality.
• “Use a metronome!” becomes the group’s refrain.

Timestamps & Standouts:

• [52:29] AG Session – "Reflection"

  • Dinged for out-of-sync drums, generic pop-punk vibe.
  • “Someone needs to get your drummer a metronome or a click track.” (Holmberg, 56:08–56:20)
  • Score: 4/10

• [58:10] 1 Star Night – "Piss Ball Pete"

  • 16 seconds long; crude, hilarious, instantly becomes a show favorite, gets played repeatedly.
  • Quote: “This is the best Playdio song I’ve ever heard. Oh my God.” (Holmberg, 58:45)
  • Score: Raised from 7 to 9 after repeated listens.
  • [67:04]: “Let me tell you a story / A man named Piss Ball Pete / His dick so small he pissed on his balls!”

• [65:47] Demonic – "My Burial"

  • Prodigy/industrial vibes, criticized for long, cliche intro and weak vocals.
  • “You’re an unknown band. You have not earned the right for us to wait for you.” (Holmberg, 69:31)

3. The Breakout: Bands That Actually Impress

• [123:04] Veins of Aether – "Siren"

  • Well-produced; voice compared to Shinedown or Miles Kennedy.
  • “They sounded like a real band... I heard a lot of nothing more and Shinedown.” (Holmberg, 123:22–123:42)
  • Scores: 7s (across the board)

• [138:06] Reckless Eden – "Skeletons"

  • Not eligible for finals due to band member being abroad, but universally praised for production and songwriting.
  • “That was outstanding... Just really—you know those are pros right there.” (Holmberg, 143:28)
  • Scores: 10s (Perfect)

• [150:21] Witness Protection – "Breath of Poison"

  • Full, modern-sounding industrial track, briefly suspected AI, but confirmed to be (mostly) real musicians using studio help.
  • “That was spectacular—spectacular. That, I want to go to a Witness Protection show right now.” (Holmberg, 153:52)
  • Scores: 10s (Perfect)
  • [211:55] “I’m not kidding when I say that that’s one of my favorite songs I’ve heard in a long time.”
  • [154:52] Listener: “For a couple of dudes throwing something together, that was great. To keep the theme though—I bet they’re gay. Stabbing Rammstein rocks!”

• [158:49] Graves of the Monuments – "Suffocate"

  • High-energy metalcore, strong but overshadowed by segment leaders.
  • “Had you played before the last... the positioning for them stunk. But... they’re very good at what they do. Production was good.” (Holmberg, 161:49)

• [174:43] Thomas James Band – "Stone Cold Killer"

  • "Huey Lewis meets the Cult," classic riffy rock, surprisingly catchy.
  • “I found myself... nothing revolutionary, but that was kind of the fun of it.” (Holmberg, 178:20–178:37)

4. Ongoing Themes and Jokes:

• Long Intros:
  “Again, everybody out there, you have to know by now. The intro—what are you doing with it? Come on.” (Holmberg, 86:26)

• Production Standards:
  “If you didn’t, and you heard what we have in our top five, you should know that you didn’t fit in for a reason. The difference... drastic.” (Holmberg, 216:15)

• GAY Joke Overload:
  Running bit: Listeners (and hosts) drown the text line with “that’s gay!” in response to nearly every band, escalating to parody.

• Listener and Crew Fatigue:
  “Why does Brady always start with a 4? The catch will be if Brady goes below four this morning.” (Toledo, 91:53)

D. Closing: Playdio Results & Reflections

[209:01–216:59]

• Top bands of the day replayed and reevaluated. Most see Witness Protection and Reckless Eden as the likely winners if they perform live.
• Playdio Day Two awaits, but after a strong final run, expectations are high.
• Holmberg wraps with gratitude, some jokes at the expense of failed bands, and encouragement for improvement.

Memorable Quote:

“The difference between our top five and people who didn’t make it—drastic.” (Holmberg, 216:19)

Notable Quotes & Moments by Timestamp

• On Michael Bidwill, Cardinals Owner:
  • “He left a tied overtime game to go eat dinner. What? Terrible.” (10:53)
  • “You owe it to your fans—not only did you leave early... that you are not even—you're not.” (15:08)
• On Playdio Submissions:
  • “You’re an unknown band. You have not earned the right for us to wait for you.” (69:31)
  • “Some of these, even their mothers wouldn’t sit through more than thirty seconds.” (paraphrased, multiple segments)
  • “Let me tell you a story. A man named Piss Ball Pete, his dick so small he pissed on his balls!” (58:29, song lyric; running joke)
  • “That was spectacular—spectacular. That, I want to go to a Witness Protection show right now.” (153:52)
• On Standout Band Quality:
  • “That was outstanding. Those are pros right there.” – (Holmberg on Reckless Eden, 143:28)
• Response to Listeners
  • “If football team owners, I’d leave a game early to catch those last three bands.” (165:32)

Top Bands Identified (by Host/Listener Consensus)

1. Witness Protection – “Breath of Poison”
2. Reckless Eden – “Skeletons” (not eligible due to member location)
3. Veins of Aether – “Siren”
4. Thomas James Band – “Stone Cold Killer”
5. Graves of the Monuments – “Suffocate”
6. 1 Star Night – “Piss Ball Pete” (purely for novelty/humor)
7. Rattlesnake Suitcase – “Love Ain’t Free”

Conclusion

Summary/Tone: The show is equal parts mean-spirited and genuinely passionate about local music. The hosts revel in roasting bad bands (“He recorded that in his car... I heard traffic in the background!”), but heap sincere praise on worthy entries. Near the end, several high-production tracks leave the hosts delighted and hopeful for Day Two.
Overall: For local bands, the bar is higher than ever: “That’s how it should sound.” (146:24) For listeners, it’s the most entertaining kind of radio roulette—sometimes a trainwreck, sometimes unexpectedly great.

For New Listeners

• You’ll enjoy: Relentless sarcasm, real local music discovery, and genuinely funny sports/media critique.
• Skip if: You dislike mean jokes, love all local bands uncritically, or want advertiser content.
• Don’t miss: The Piss Ball Pete bit (58:29), the reckoning over Michael Bidwill (09:03–16:25), and the show’s sincere appreciation of “real music” from the standouts (esp. 143:28, 153:52, 211:55).

For more, listen to the episode or check the show notes at 98kupd.com.