Holmberg's Morning Sickness (98KUPD)

Episode: 11-28-25 – “Woman At Suns Game w/No Pants On – Maggots In Drink – Nov 2024 BO”
Date: November 28, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Episode Overview

In this lively and irreverent episode, the Morning Sickness crew covers a range of absurd and eyebrow-raising local stories and personal anecdotes, including a Suns game attendee with no pants, a shocking encounter with maggots in a drink, and Arizona’s dubious distinction of being #2 in the country for unidentified bodies. The team’s signature blend of sharp observation, locker-room humor, and social commentary makes for an entertaining listen filled with both laughs and uncomfortable questions.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Suns Game Story: The Pantsless Woman

(Timestamps: 01:10 – 06:53 & 22:00 – 25:45)

• Holmberg’s Recap: John shares his run of bad luck when bringing friend Matt Coleman to Suns games—both times, star player Kevin Durant gets sidelined with injuries right before they go. John jokes that Matt is a "mush" for the Suns.
  • Quote [01:10 | Holmberg]:
    “I’m not taking you to games anymore. You hurt Kevin Durant. That’s what you do. He’s the mush of the Suns.”
• The Main Attraction: The real highlight at the game turns out to be a woman near their seats, notably not wearing any pants—just an oversized shirt that barely covered her.
  • John and Matt debate buying her shorts at the team shop for "sanitary reasons" with John quipping, “so your vagina doesn’t touch the seat anymore.”
  • The group discusses whether her choice is about confidence, attention, or simply "not caring."
  • Holmberg describes her as attractive and compares aging women to classic cars: “a lady’s like a car—maintenance. We all have to do it.”
• OnlyFans & Public Decency: Bret jokes she could be an OnlyFans content creator; John counters that there’s no point charging for content online if you’re “just walking around a game with no pants on. You can see more—it’s free!”
• Audience & Security Reactions: There’s astonishment that no security or officials said a word, leading to commentary on double standards for attractiveness.
  • Quote [05:24 | Holmberg]:
    “She’s pulling a full Donald Duck right there at the gate. And nobody seemed to say, ‘Hey, you need pants.’”
• Hygiene Horrors: The crew realizes she’s eating food off her lap, speculating on germs picked up from the stadium seat. A gross-out moment as they imagine the state of public seating.
  • Quote [24:22 | Holmberg]:
    “God knows what was leaking out of them and getting all over that chair… I’m going to wipe my seat down like I do an airplane tray every time I go now, just in case some pig did that.”

2. Maggots in the Drink

(Timestamps: 06:53 – 09:38)

• Disgusting Anecdote: The story shifts to Brady’s friend Billy, who discovers maggots at the bottom of a nearly-finished cocktail poured into a Mason jar at a home football party.

  • The crew debates whether they came from the jar, the can, or somewhere else in the process.
  • Quote [07:25 | Brady]:
    “Seven maggots—in the alcohol.”
  • They joke about “pulling a tequila worm” and that at least alcohol “kills the idea” of ingesting maggots.

• Potluck Peril: This segues into skepticism about potlucks and “dicking around with your own things”—a warning that poorly managed home concoctions can result in things like… maggots in your drink.

  • John: “Next thing you know, you’re eating maggots.”

3. Arizona’s Ranking for Unidentified Bodies

(Timestamps: 09:39 – 21:34)

• Startling Statistic: Arizona is #2 in the country for unidentified bodies, a fact that the hosts mock-commiserate about.
  • Quote [09:59 | John]:
    “Arizona has just been ranked number two... in the nation—better than 50th… in unidentified bodies.”
  • They note California is #1 (2,952 bodies) vs. Arizona’s 2,125, despite Arizona’s much smaller population—“so per capita, clobberate it.”
• Comic Mafia Theories: John jokes about Arizona’s ties to witness relocation and mafia families from the East, attributing the prevalence of unidentified bodies to “no one talking” and tongue-in-cheek Italian stereotypes about changing names but “not mindsets.”
• Extended Skit – “Identifying Bodies”: The group riff improvisationally on a bit with “Mr. Jefferson” and “Lionel” as a state official comes to identify bodies, parodying uncooperative or deeply weird conversations.
  • Highlight [15:34–18:52 | Group]:
    Role-play features evasive answers, dark humor, and over-the-top voices, culminating in the deadpan:
    “I’m not going door to door in this city identifying missing bodies, that’s for sure.”
• Family Apathy: The hosts muse on the disturbing possibility that if nobody steps up to identify a body, “they didn’t want to be found,” or “something terrible is going on.”
  • John: “If the family doesn’t care, why do you?”
• Border Crossers: Listeners email in to ask if unidentified bodies include undocumented migrants; the team agrees this is likely, and darkly joke about the challenge of identifying border crossers.
  • Quote [21:24 | John]:
    “You find a gaggle of border crossers… all with Dora the Explorer backpacks… this is gonna be tough.”

4. Additional Memorable Moments

• Double Standard Commentary: The hosts return to the game story. If a man attended in only a shirt, “they’d ask him to stand up, bring him over there, and find something for him. ... [But] woman does it and she’s good looking, people don’t say a word.”
  • Quote [23:13 | Bret]:
    “If a guy had no pants on... Or just wearing a long shirt, that's a dress.”
• More on Stadium Hygiene: John elaborates on the gross-out factor of public seating after big events (Iron Maiden, Tom Segura, etc.), borrowing from infamous Oprah “movie theater seat” swab horror stories.
  • Quote [24:22 | John]:
    “...never once has the cleaning crew gone to all 18,000 seats inside there... Remember when Oprah did that thing about movie theater seats? ... feces and DNA of anything that came out of some frog.”

Notable Quotes (with Timestamps)

• “She’s pulling a full Donald Duck right there at the gate.”
  — John Holmberg, [05:24]

• “My buddy Billy had his drink, and… seven maggots.”
  — Brady Bogen, [07:25]

• “I gotta say, if I went missing and everybody said, there’s an unidentified body and no one stepped up, A, I didn’t want to be found, and B, nobody’s coming forward, that means something terrible is going on.”
  — John Holmberg, [19:16]

• “You find a gaggle of border crossers laying there with all those Edgar haircuts and the exact same flannel shirt, and you’re like, Jesus, we gotta figure out which one is what.”
  — John Holmberg, [21:36]

Summary Table of Major Segments & Timestamps

| Segment | Timestamps | |-------------------------------------------------|--------------| | Suns Game “Pantsless Woman” Story | 01:10–06:53, 22:00–25:45 | | Maggots in the Drink | 06:53–09:38 | | Arizona’s Unidentified Bodies & Mafia Origins | 09:39–21:34 | | Roleplaying the “Identifying Bodies” Process | 15:34–18:52 | | Stadium Hygiene Callbacks & Double Standards | 22:00–25:45 |

Tone and Style

The episode is packed with irreverent, no-holds-barred humor, pop culture references, and local Arizona pride mixed with self-deprecating asides. The hosts never shy from outrageous observations or uncomfortable truths, riffing off each other in quick, comedic exchanges. The conversational style is energetic, candid, and frequently “blue,” fitting the show’s reputation for pushing boundaries.

In essence:
If you missed this episode, you missed the blend of wild Arizona stories, gross-out laughter, and pointed social commentary that makes Holmberg’s Morning Sickness a staple of Phoenix radio—whether they’re talking about “Donald Ducking” at NBA games, unexpected maggot protein shots, or the lingering mysteries of Arizona’s unidentified.