12-03-25 - Recapping Last Night's Playdio Finals - Guy On Trial And His Cheating Wife Porn Searches Are In Evidence Making Us Worry About Our Search Histories - Did Someone Roofy John Last Night As We Recall Our Blackout Nights

Summary

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Holmberg's Morning Sickness (12-03-25)

Recapping Playdio Finals, Cheating Wife Porn Trial Fears & Blackout Night Antics

Date: December 3, 2025 | Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

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Main Theme / Episode Overview

Today’s show is an energetic blend of recapping last night’s Playdio Finals—HMS’s annual local band competition—mixed with weird and worried ruminations on how internet search histories can come back to haunt you, and hilarious tales of possible party foul play (“Did someone roofy John last night?”). In typical HMS fashion, it’s equal parts music scene hype, true crime commentary, and self-deprecating confessionals about blackout mishaps and questionable late-night googling.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Playdio Finals Recap & Backstage Stories (01:19–10:06)

• Atmosphere & Highlights:
  • Last night’s Playdio event at Copper Blues was “a good night” packed with “screaming, yelling at people, super party” for the five local band finalists.
  • “It was fun. It was a good night. Thanks, Copper Blues and everybody who popped by.” (01:34, John)
• Praise for Contestants:
  • DJ Bathsheba’s stage fright stood out: “Hard to watch somebody that talented not believe in themselves… the whole room had her back.” (01:34–02:41, John)
  • Highlights for Thomas James Band, Graves of the Monuments, The Mess I Made, and more, plus John Gordon (HMS staffer) surprising everyone by being in a band.
• Charity Angle:
  • “Raised a couple bucks for the Humane Society, which I’ll match. Not crazy, but I’ll throw in a match on last night's money.” (07:54, John)
• On Next Steps:
  • Announcing the new Playdio champion and theme song at 8:30am; praise for last year’s champs, Miles to Nowhere: “The bar has been set high.” (09:09, John)

2. Mining Mishaps & Double Entendres (04:36–11:04)

• DJ Bathsheba’s Story:
  • Childhood in foster care, breast cancer survivor, now a truck driver (including driving for gold mining operations).
  • Hilarious “semen truck” autocorrect incident: “That means you spell semen more than you spell cement!” (04:11, John)
• Arizona Gold Mining Lore:
  • Talk of “glory holes” (both literal and not-so-literal): “Do you know what that’s called? It’s called the glory hole.” (05:02, John)
  • Interest in real Arizona goldmines, riffing about Scooby-Doo, haunted islands, and urban mining legends.

3. Search Histories, True Crime & Porn Panic (11:04–24:16)

• Brian (or “Brandon”) Walsh Murder Trial:
  • A man on trial whose weird porn searches (“cheating wife porn”) and suspicious googles (“can a body decompose in plastic?”, “how do you get blood out of wood?”) are being used as evidence.
  • John and the crew debate if it’s fair to drag someone’s porn history into a courtroom:
    • “You should be allowed to have your porn searches not ever apply to your personality, because… nobody’s into stepmothers for real, are they?” (11:57, John)
• Slippery Slope/Funny Examples:
  • Joking the news would go, “He loved women stuck in dryers. I bet he put her there!”
  • Vivid analogies: “Your brain will do all sorts of goofy stuff when you’re on Pornhub and get you into some stuff…whoa.” (16:09, John)
• IRS & OnlyFans:
  • Discussion of the IRS having to review OnlyFans accounts to determine if content is taxable/pornographic: “IRS agents… now reviewing porn.” (17:32, Brett)

4. Google Guilt & Digital Privacy Paranoia (20:56–27:46)

• Our Online Past Haunting Us:
  • “Last night I felt like somebody Mickeyed me... I Googled, ‘How long does it take for roofies to kick in?’ If somebody I know gets roofied, they're gonna look at my internet and go, ‘What were you searching that for?’” (21:34, John)
• The Dangers of Neuralink/Thought Surveillance:
  • John debates the pros/cons of getting a Neuralink chip:
    • “If they said, ‘Hey, we’ll put the Neuralink in—it’s free, we just wanna test it on you,’ I think I would. …Unless I physically kill a person, things in my head can never be used against me in a court of law.” (24:16–25:09, John)
  • “If someone else can see [my thoughts], and they probably could, that would be the whole purpose.” (26:12, Brett)
  • Laugh-out-loud worry: “If I'm driving down the road and just see Brett giving a hand job to a homeless guy, I'm gonna rewind that and laugh for hours.” (26:28, John)

5. Party Blackouts & The “Who Roofied John?” Mystery (27:46–34:56)

• Strange Memory Gaps After Playdio Night:
  • John describes possibly being “roofied”—waking up on a picnic table miles away after not drinking much: “I've been poisoned before. Drinking, it was vodka, and I ended up at a picnic table in San Jose.” (31:15, John)
  • Paranoia and playful accusations: “Only people I figure could've poisoned me were Katie and the Hobbs... maybe it's DJ Bathsheba... maybe it was Larry... I didn't drink with her…” (32:55–33:35)
  • “If you do roofie me, make it count. The next day, at least make me limp. Leave a bruise.” (36:41, John)
• Safety Reminders (with Signature Silliness):
  • Don’t leave your drink alone; only take unopened bottles; never accept a drink from strangers (or even certain acquaintances).
  • “My ass feels okay. So, no matter what they did, I’m going to the doctor for it…” (34:43, John)

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Notable Quotes / Memorable Moments (with Timestamps)

• On Performance Anxiety:
  • “It’s hard to watch somebody that talented not believe in themselves, but the other bands did. And they went up there and just flat kicked ass.” (01:34, John)
• On Unfortunate Autocorrects:
  • “His phone autocorrected to ‘semen truck’... means you spell semen more than you spell cement.” (04:11, John)
• On Gold Mining Etymology:
  • “Do you know what that’s called? It’s called the glory hole. Where is it?!” (05:02, John)
• Porn Searches & Fairness in Court:
  • “You should be allowed to have your porn searches not ever apply to your personality…” (11:57, John)
  • “Your brain will do all sorts of goofy stuff when you’re on Pornhub... There’s been like, Lia Silver is a pornstar I’ve searched before… Doesn’t mean I liked it.” (16:09, John)
• Digital Privacy Dread:
  • “Last night I Googled, ‘How long does it take for roofies to kick in?’... That’s a lot of explaining.” (21:34, John)
  • “Would you volunteer for Neuralink? ...No, you wouldn’t do it. I think I would. I’d be on it. But an NDA—you can never use this data against me, unless I physically kill somebody.” (24:16–25:09, John)
  • “If someone else can see [my thoughts], and they probably could, that’d be the whole purpose.” (26:12, Brett)
• HMS-Classic Blackout Storytelling:
  • “I ended up at a picnic table in San Jose... My no-blood anus was intact.” (31:15, John)
  • “If you do roofie me, make it count… make me limp. Leave a bruise.” (36:41, John)

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Important Timestamps for Key Segments

• [01:19] – Show enters main content; Playdio recap starts
• [02:41] – Support & praise for Playdio contestants; DJ Bathsheba’s story
• [07:54] – Charity fundraising highlights
• [11:04] – Conversation pivots to true crime and porn searches as evidence
• [16:29] – Lively debate: Should your porn history be admissible in court?
• [20:56] – Google search panic ("How long do roofies take?")
• [24:16] – Neuralink/brain privacy philosophical rabbit hole
• [27:46] – “Who roofied John?” playfully investigated
• [31:15] – Story of past real-life blackout (San Jose picnic table)
• [34:43] – Healthcare jokes, more physical "evidence" humor

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Tone & Language

The hosts trade in their usual irreverent, observational, and wildly self-aware humor—bouncing from local music community shoutouts to the dark edges of digital culture, always ready with playful barbs, personal anecdotes, and the sort of bro-ish honesty that HMS fans expect.

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Summary for Listeners

This HMS episode is a quintessential whirlwind: high-energy, inside-baseball Playdio Finals gossip, true crime musings that spiral into hilarious “could they use our search histories?” anxiety, and a closing round of blackout-night whodunit. If you missed it, expect laughs, some real life lessons, and plenty of “Did they really just say that?” moments—plus a new appreciation for both the Arizona local music scene and the cautionary tales embedded in every Google search you make.

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Transcript

[Announcer]

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[John Holmberg]

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[John Holmberg]

You thought that was funny?

You were laughing like a hyena when he said it. 98. What the hell is wrong with you?

P.D. good morning, everybody.

[Brett]

Hello there.

[John Holmberg]

Welcome to Wednesday. It is 5:45. My name's John. There's Brady, there's Brett, there's big Dick Toledo. We're ready to go. Hold on. And we're off and running for this glorious show.

[Announcer]

Those late nights.

[John Holmberg]

It is. Well, it is. Yeah. It's breathing the cool air too. It didn't help. I had the windows open, everything. So. Yeah. And screaming and yelling at people last night. We had our big the Playdio super party last night. The five fans, the finalists that were there. And all in all went well. I was ultimately mad at DJ Beth Sheba for not having the, I don't know, confidence, I guess. She kept telling me, I'm a bad performer. I'm like, stop saying that. And she was, you know, so she was very shy. Come up. Super shy. And it was like, come on. It was kind of was a neat moment in the room because you felt like the whole room had her back. Like, just go. And she was. Yeah, she was scared to go forward. And then afterwards I talked to her. I'm like, will you please just go, oh, I don't perform. I'm like, shut up. It's hard to watch somebody that Talented, not believe in themselves, but the other bands did. And they went up there and just flat kicked ass. It was fun. It was a good night. Thanks. Copper Blues and everybody who popped by and everything that happened, it's another one. And then today is the day we will then.

Crown, crown a champion, crown a winner to do our theme song. And then at the end of the night, the gang from Katie and the Hobbs came by miles to Noah the the theme song for this year, last year's champion, and said that they were going to enter the contest this year and have just written the song they were going to use as our theme song for next year as their entry. And I'm like, that would have probably been an auto win. It was just hilarious and well done. And they said they were in the middle of doing other stuff, so she couldn't get.

[Announcer]

I told Kristen, I'm like, you got it. You should have did that. I know. But yeah, she tours with another band too. Like.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I didn't know that either does.

[Announcer]

Sound or lights or something. They just. She just got back into town like a week or two ago and she wasn't sure she's gonna make it.

[John Holmberg]

I liked everybody we had. The Thomas James Band was great. Graves of the monuments was just. They went up there and putting it out there. Clobbered everybody with sound. And then the mess I made without fear and DJ Bathsheba went crazy. DJ Bathsheba has a story, man. She had breast cancer a couple years ago. She was in the foster program when she was younger and just kept going. She's got a charity she told me about called eyeslikemine inc.org and it's basically a charity you can look into for foster program and all that other stuff. Doesn't get you foster kids, but it helps out the stuff like that. Then you start talking to them like you've been through it all. The reason she's a truck driver, we were making fun last week that her friend said she's driving a semen truck. Well, he. And the. One of the worst misspellings in an email ever meant cement truck.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

But his phone autocorrected to semen truck. And I said, you know, that means you spell semen and off like a lot more than you spell cement. And so he said the only reason she was doing that is cause after she had her surgery for breast cancer, the only thing she could do is drive. Like keep her hands in front of her and drive. And she goes, well, I might as well get a job doing that. Doing something with that and she ends up driving trucks. Pretty awesome. That's. There's some ambition behind that.

[Brett]

You know, her other trucking job, because she can handle the big rigs. And the company that she's working for, none of the guys can do it. They're gold miners.

[John Holmberg]

We're up in Montana and Alaska.

[Brett]

Here.

[John Holmberg]

We have gold miners here.

[Brett]

I guess so.

[John Holmberg]

Not the lost ball, Willie.

[Brett]

Are they panning?

[John Holmberg]

We're not talking about.

[Brett]

No, it's like lottery drives the. A rig over there so they can hit, you know, dig around that.

[John Holmberg]

Do you know what that's called? It's called the glory hole. Where is it? We have a gold mine glory hole.

[Brett]

You don't say. Where the.

[John Holmberg]

Sure you do. If there's people driving, it's like fight club.

[Announcer]

You don't talk about it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, she was talking about it like. That's you.

[Announcer]

It's Brady. Come on.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's true. He's not gonna ask you any questions. There was. So there's a big gold mine glory hole somewhere nearby.

[Brett]

I don't know about big gold mine.

[Announcer]

I told you it didn't matter.

[John Holmberg]

But they need a truck to haul things back and forth. That's a pretty big mine.

[Commercial Voice 2]

Yeah.

[Brett]

Or they need to get the. To be able to pull a certain rig over there to help.

[John Holmberg]

Right. That's what I'm saying. So we got us a big glory hole somewhere around here.

[Brett]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

See, that's your story. I'm asking. You didn't ask her, like, where is it?

[Brett]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, how does it get through that? You didn't care where it was. I gotta. You cared enough to tell us there's a gold mine.

[Brett]

I just want to know if they're panning and I could join him.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's not a gold mine. That's just prospecting. Gold mining, like in the hole in the earth? Yeah. There's a truck involved. So she runs gold back and forth.

[Brett]

I don't think she's running the gold. I think she's just operating the equipment form man.

[John Holmberg]

All right, I could watch that. That's interesting. I need to know where this gold mine is. All right, well. Well, we'll ask the pertinent questions, but thanks for the tip of the iceberg, Brady. Jesus Christ.

Be tough to be Brady's significant other. Because he takes you right to the edge and then goes to sleep. I haven't. I wanted to. I wanted to finish that story. My God. Well, anyway, so she's truck driver.

[Brett]

I don't know what to believe from her. She said she's a performer.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. She said she's not a performer.

[Brett]

I know.

[John Holmberg]

She kept saying she wasn't a performer anyway.

[Brett]

Then what are you doing?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Then why'd you dress up and get on stage? Get up there and do so. Yeah. The other bands were great. And our own little John Gordon here, we didn't even know that he was in the contest until we played the song. Like, this is John Gordon's being like, what the. And those guys crushed it. They were great. There's a lot of good stuff that happened last night. And we'll have the. The new champion crowned later today.

[Brett]

Very calm under pressure, too. Jg when his guitar all a sudden. Was it getting power? He could have thrown a fit.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, that's part of the gig up there. We always have.

[Brett]

I thought it been cool to see him chuck a guitar at this.

[Announcer]

John Gordon can throw fan.

[John Holmberg]

Like the most mild manner guy ever.

[Brett]

He.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he did. He did. I mean, I'm always up for a good guitar chucking at a sound guy. It seems unreasonable for.

[Brett]

Even though it's not his fault.

[John Holmberg]

Well, sometimes it is, sometimes it's not. But still, it seems like a crime more than anything else. Just like. You'll get past it. You've had some sound issues, but yeah, it was great. Everybody. Everybody did a good job and we had fun. And we packed the place on a Tuesday night. So happy for everybody to come by. Raised a couple bucks for the Humane Society, which I'll match. It's not crazy. And I'll throw in a match on last night's money. It's like 400 bucks, right?

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

So we'll make it a little bit more. That's pretty great. And help out the Humane Society.

[Announcer]

There's a couple people just came over and. Hey, where's that bucket at them?

[Brett]

I don't know.

[Announcer]

I think they left me here. Put this in your envelope.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Yeah, we had a. We had a bucket at the door, except for the door guy was standing on the other side of the room. So nobody knew where to go. And they're just giving us money. I had people wandering up to me, just going, here you go. Felt like I was at your. One of your family functions.

[Announcer]

What happens?

[John Holmberg]

Here you go. And somebody. And I'm like, why are you giving me money? Did we. Did we bet on something? Like. No, for the dogs. I'm like, oh, so let me put. And I'm just giving it to you. I'm like, I'm gonna lose this. I think I gave some to Larry.

[Brett]

I did Notice Brett was collecting money. And Brett would say, you're protected.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Thank you. God bless. That's all I kept hearing. I'm like, are you. What. What's going on behind you? And then Brett's just licking, counting cash. But yeah, it was great. And we. So we raised a couple bucks. We had a good time. And we'll let you know somewhere around 8:30 this morning, who gets the two grand. Who gets crowned Plateo champion 2026, so to speak. And gets to write our theme song. And then we'll be part of this show every single morning we're on live, we will play the theme song that they write for us. And we only have, what, eight or nine shows left this year for Miles to Nowhere song, which is. It's a crowd favorite. People were bringing it up last night. I'm like, I. I sing that stupid song sometimes.

And I always sing it, like, can't go to Porkopolis. Cause it's closed. Homebuyer. I'm like, in my backyard, I'm going, are you kidding me? Is that still in my head? It's Sunday afternoon. So it was a catchy one. You got your. The bar has been set high. And we'll. We'll find out if they can match it or, you know, make a fool of themselves. And then for the entire year, they'll be remembered as the man who made a fool themselves. They said Table Mesa. I'm getting these. Table Mesa has a gold pit, small gold mine up by Crown King that actually ruined the entire road and river. I know there's mines out there by Table Mesa Road. When you take your off road stuff, there's a couple of mines, but they look abandoned. Like, I don't like a gold mine. When I watch on tv, the Glory Hole guys, the things they're doing huge holes in the earth. Like, massive. So I'm looking for that. I want to be part of it. Maybe that's what I want to do when I'm done here. Hang around Glory Hole.

[Brett]

That island, that haunted island. It is. Went on for like four or five years. It's on.

[John Holmberg]

Like, I think it's Scooby Doo. Thinking of a Scooby Doo.

[Announcer]

Old Man Withers.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That was not real birdie. That was the. The kids broke that up. Old man. Yeah. Old Man Withers was just fooling him to distract him to. And he gotten away with it too. If it wasn't for their meddling. I don't know anything about the haunted island of gold. I do know that Scooby and Shaggy were involved in that. Were there also zombie pirates on this island? I think programs, Zombie pilots, Haunted island of Gold. It was. I think it was one of those DVD movies that they made. I don't know anything about that. But you'd think. You'd think that having lived here for as long as we have, we'd know something about a gold mine or a glory hole. Know about copper, but, yeah, it's all they suck out of the earth here is copper. And that's all I knew. There's nothing beautiful about where they're doing that. I want to see gold pop out of those golden them hills.

Google search it, but be careful.

[Announcer]

I don't know if I want that on my search.

[John Holmberg]

I was. I Google searched some stuff last night, then fell onto the. The article about a guy who was searching. You know, he did cheating life porn and stuff like that. He liked the ones where the wife was not supposed to be doing what she was doing. And they're using it in court today. And I'm like, why do I know this name? It's the Brandon Walsh. Not Brandon Walsh. That's the guy from 902 and O'. Brien. Walsh. Brian Walshy or Walsh. He's the dude that three years ago, his wife disappeared, and then he went into Home Depot with gloves on and bought a hatchet and some baking soda.

[Announcer]

I see him at one of the murder shows.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And then went right back to his computer that night and said, can a body decompose in plastic? Like Search and Google? He didn't even, like, try to hide it or go at least to a friend's house. He did it right on his own. And they said, how do you get blood out of wood floors? And what's the best way to clean that to avoid luminolo. Like everything you'd do if you killed someone. And the trial started this week, and now they're using the other thing against him, which was his fetish for cheating wife porn. And so he'd search that. I mean, if they're going to start you, there should be. That should be off limits. You should be allowed to have your porn searches not ever apply to your personality, because it's just not. Nobody's into stepmothers for real, are they? Like, you can't really say, well, and then he did this. Like, no, no, we all know those are fake. And cheating wife porn isn't actual cheating wife porn or women stuck in dryers or under beds. That's not a real thing. Oh, man. If it just so happens Mathias gets stuck in a dryer and dies. They'd go through your Internet and go, this guy loved women stuck in dryers. I bet he put her there. That's not fair. I think that should be legally off limits. John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness was that easy to.

[Brett]

For them to track down with the end of the year, YouTube recaps of.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, maybe it had his thing that popped up and said, here's your Spotify.

[Announcer]

Your top five searches.

[John Holmberg]

Well, he hit it pretty hard, and it was after. It was on January 1st, so they caught him somewhere. But it would have been really good if his last search for the. For the new year or the old year was just all that. But, yeah, there he's. He's. He's an idiot. And I didn't know this about him before he got caught for. Well, he didn't murder his wife. They have never found the body. He said that he did dismember her, and he won't tell him where it is. So he's just basically saying he handled the corpse poorly and that she got. She died suddenly and he panicked.

[Announcer]

Rookies.

[John Holmberg]

That's a. That's a murder.

[Brett]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Dying suddenly, and then the guy with you panics and cut you up. Even if you. Even if he was telling the truth at that point, you got to go to jail for murder for that one. Right? Brett died. Right now, the last thing Brady and I would do is go, oh, my God. Well, cut him up and hide him. Like I'd be. It's a pretty easy get out. If she just died suddenly and you wanted to go, you call the cops and go, I think she's dead. And then you take your chances without going to the Internet. But he went to the Internet. He was selling fake Andy Warhols to people at work prior to chopping his wife up. But I'm pretty sure we're wasting everybody's time with a trial. This is like, three years later. And we're going down his Internet history today, the one you got him on. I mean, how can you. You go into the trial and you just basically say, here's his Internet history the day after she went missing. The prosecution rests. Like, there's nothing more I can do than, how do you get the blood out of floors? And do bodies decompose in plastic? All you got on the other side is, well, they never found her. But he even said, yeah, I chopped her up. I was just afraid you killed her then. No, no, no, I didn't kill her. That's a madman's move. Chopping her up is the craziest part of the whole thing. Killing is less weird than chopping her up.

[Brett]

You go through that whole process. It's like the kid that killed the CEO.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Luigi, man. Yeah, yeah.

[Brett]

They're going with. They didn't read him the Miranda.

[John Holmberg]

Well, they're trying to get him out. Yeah, right. There's no question he did what he did. He's pleading guilty to most of it, but they're saying that's some technicalities. Those things you kind of have to do.

[Brett]

You imagine if. Oh, yeah, we forgot to do that. I mean.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, he wasn't properly Mirandized. He did get them, but not until later. And there's a bunch of goofs with that. And if they goof that up. That's the way it works. There's guys who've gotten away with, you know, less high profile than that. But, yeah, if you're on a. Again, if Brett says, oh, my God, this person I love very much passed away, like, what'd you do? Oh, I immediately chopped them up and hid them. Like, well, then that's the worst part. That's the worst part of it. I'd rather someone kill me than, you know, suffer a heart attack or something and then know that they chopped up my body and stuffed it in some hole. Maybe it was that glory hole. Brady doesn't know where it is. But if you've got porn searches and they're going to be used, and I think that's much like the Miranda stuff. Inadmissible in court. Your brain will do all sorts of goofy stuff. When you're on pornhub and get you into some stuff, you're like, whoa. Because there's been like, Lia Silver is a porn star that I've searched before. And she does. Yeah, go ahead and give her a look.

[Announcer]

I will.

[John Holmberg]

And she's got, like, a tattoo that I like. Very pretty girl. Haven't. Haven't been on her page for a while, but there's a couple of them in there where she gets involved with another guy with a ton of tattoos. And so I clicked on heard thing thinking it was them and it wasn't. And he was doing something horrible to a girl. And there's one that I saw that was a simulated assault. And the girl was at home and her stepbrother wanted to watch TV and she wanted to work out in the same room. And he got mad and he got pretty violent with her to where I actually turned it off like, this is too much. But it's still in my history. You know, there's. Yeah, there's Laia Silver, Brett founder. She's good. That's a good one right there.

[Brett]

Nice kill.

[John Holmberg]

But she was doing some stuff with a guy and then I accidentally went on to his pages and he's horrible to people, like with punching and throatin and doesn't mean I liked it. Can we at least say that we. You know, we should have to do. Review each video afterwards. We should be forced to say, how'd.

[Announcer]

We do like a Google review?

[John Holmberg]

Stars.

[Brett]

And you know who's reviewing porn now? IRS agents.

[John Holmberg]

Well, they've been doing it because the tips. Oh. For the new law.

[Brett]

They have to. If they're making money, they have to determine whether it's pornographic or not because they have like, on only fans. A lot of times there's an activity where it's not pornographic. Well. And if they're collecting money on it.

[John Holmberg]

So they're going to define what pornography is.

[Announcer]

This is definitely.

[John Holmberg]

That's pornography. Correct. Brady. If I gave her a dollar or two for. I mean. Or is he just doing an anal exam? I don't know what this is. That's pretty good stuff. Lions. I'm putting that on Facebook.

[Announcer]

A couple of dollars.

[John Holmberg]

Pretty fantastic.

[Brett]

Unless she's checking the prostate there. But, you know.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, and she probably does at one point or another make sure that his prostate is healthy. And that's a good.

[Brett]

That's a medical.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That's a lot of men to have found her. I think you can write that off. She's a doctor and she loves him.

[Announcer]

He's lucky to have found her.

[John Holmberg]

But I've seen some porn that's on my.

[Announcer]

So are both of those guys.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, no, it's who it.

[Brett]

She's.

[John Holmberg]

You know what? She was running busy in the lobby that day.

[Announcer]

She doesn't want people waiting.

[John Holmberg]

No. She's a giver and she wants to make sure that these guys get their exams. But bottom line is there's stuff I'm sure that you've watched on pornhub that if something went sideways in you and they went through your history, be like, oh, you're into that, huh? But maybe you didn't like it. Maybe while you were watching, like, oh, I hated that Kimmy Granger did a video once where she got beat up in the whole thing. And I. I was like, I don't like this at all. But I watched all the way through. I didn't. I wasn't doing anything. On the other end was like, how do they end this? And she was violated fairly. I don't know.

[Brett]

Did you go back online and ask the questions?

[John Holmberg]

No, I didn't. I didn't. I didn't, I didn't. But still, they're not saying that he didn't go back and ask it. He just had, you know, cheating wife porn. Like, oh, he's into that, eh? And Evan. And he was worried that she was cheating. And I don't know what the heck what's going on when he cut her up. But.

Yeah, there's Kimmy Crazer. Brett's finding them all.

[Announcer]

I'm trying to help Brady out here. He needs the visuals kind of guy doing.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's Kimmy. And I, I. You know, and the worst part is, is I wanted to find that video again later because I'm like, you got to see this. Not going to believe what I saw here. I mean, the guy's actually, like, swinging on her.

[Announcer]

Oh, yeah. I don't like.

[John Holmberg]

I want to see that. No. But I wanted to see it again to show friends that it was a thing.

It looks like I went back to it a couple of times. Didn't mean I liked it. I just couldn't believe it. Can you imagine if they searched your work emails.

If, you know, God forbid, Mathias came up missing and then ended up in seven different parts of the state. And they searched and then listened to the show and said, oh, they made fun of them all the time for dismembering bodies. And they just took that for this dude was. You know, he's guilty of what he did, but you can't go to his pornhub searches. That's where your brain's allowed to do whatever it wants. That's. That's like your imagination getting you in trouble. It's like being in North Korea. You can't have that. What am I supposed to do? Just puritan nuns. And even then, if I start searching nuns on pornhub, I think so give it a. Give it a look. See, but if you look for nuns on pornhub, just don't search anything as it pertains to. Just find stories and search recipes and. But never, ever, ever ask about ropes or hatchets or.

[Announcer]

Or go to the library, use their computers.

[John Holmberg]

See, like last night, I felt like somebody Mickeyed me. My head spun. I didn't feel right. I wasn't drinking all. There's nuns. Britt found some nuns doing. Is that what you wrote me?

[Brett]

That?

[John Holmberg]

I was like, all right, Puritan nunporn is actually now part of our. Of our lives. Well, damn it. And see, this is where you go and show your friends. And if some nun shows up missing like, oh, she's gone. And Brett was around that none the day before, they go through your Internet. Next thing you know, they think you're into this. That nun's hot. Oh, I've never said that before.

That nun is hot. Holy smokes. All right. Puritan nunporn. Oh, yeah. All right, turn that off. That's a very distracting nun Sister Mary Jugs. Yeah, very. So, yeah, but last night I was like, somebody got. Somebody put something in my drink because I don't get hangovers. I don't get things like. So I googled, how long does it take for roofies to kick in? Well, if somebody I know gets roofied, they're gonna look at my Internet and go, what were you searching that for? I was like, I thought I got roofied. Oh, did you then? Well, I didn't roofie anybody. Now you're defensive and it's over. That, that's a. It's a terrible invention, this Google box. Nobody needs that thing around anymore. So just go through your search history, maybe just trash your computer, get all new IP talking about routers, putting it.

[Brett]

In your head now with a neuro link.

[John Holmberg]

Oh yeah. What's gonna happen when they dig into the stand? Please plug it in. Well, there's a black mirror episode where they can rewind your memory. Oh, and things you saw. It's like, that's not actually accurate. Let's go back in your memory and rewind it. And it rewinds the whole thing. It's like, oh yeah, I guess that did happen that way. I saw it a different way. And it's all chipped. It goes into the database, the national database, and everybody can see your memories. If they. It's bad. Any court case was all memories. It's terrifying. And of course there was a chopped up body and a missing person in a trash, like in a bucket. And they went back on the people's memories and saw that they lied about a truck that they had. It's a good black mirror, is a great one. Pretty much anything you can think of that would horrify you for the future. They've done an hour episode on it. But that rewinding memory thing, we sit and giggle at it. Very real neuralink goes in your head, I don't know, the next few years and the next thing you know you're going to have somebody able to check into it. Or you can show someone memories as often as people send memes to each other. Imagine if you could send what you saw without pictures. Like, you know, I saw a guy who looked like he was from Song of the south crossing the road the other day. Big, gray beard, bald, whistling. There were birds nearby him, although they weren't birds. I think they were flies. Very, very homeless, very poor. And he had, like, two bags over his shoulders, tattered pants. I'm like, that dude is the guy from Song of the South. And I tried to get a good picture, and I couldn't. I was gonna send it to you morons, but if I could take mental snapshots with my neuralink and send you guys the whole thing with my commentary, you'd have died laughing.

So I would love to do it. But the downside. Would you volunteer for that? If they said, hey, we'll put the neural link in. It's free. We just want to test you out. No, you wouldn't do it. I think I would. I think I'd be on it. But I. I sign, like, a disclosure. An NDA would have to be like, you can't use any of this. No matter what I think, say, or see, this can never be used against me unless I physically kill a person. Things that are going on in my head can never be used against me in a court of law. Then I'll put it in there, because that's the only reason to invent it is to stop crime altogether. It's the only way. John Holmberg's morning sickness. The 98 KUPD. Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brett]

You're just saying it surprised me that you would jump right into it.

[John Holmberg]

I do that. Yeah. Well, I don't think any crime that.

[Brett]

You know, I wouldn't do it on the premise of, look, I'm not trust anyone right off the bat on that, you're immediately saying, I trust this person.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I'm saying that I trust that I'm not going to do anything.

[Brett]

Medical field or what? What is the mission behind this?

[John Holmberg]

It doesn't bother me. Yeah, I'm not like a type. I don't want, you know, question a person in general. Sure, Absolutely. I'm not into government interference, but if it's some company. If Elon Musk said, let me put this in your head, and I'm like, well, I'd ask some questions. I wouldn't.

[Brett]

I'd want to hear about it first rather than, like, sign me up.

[John Holmberg]

If he's just like, you get to rewind your memories and you can see things and just like, take a look at yesterday. Like, okay. And it's just me. It's like, yeah. And I can't share it. And nobody can tap into this. I'm like, everything can be broken into, but for the most part.

[Brett]

And that's all you're gonna do, right? Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I can't. You can't see him. If someone else can see him, and they probably could, that would be the whole purpose.

[Brett]

It's basically handing over your. Your phone.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I wouldn't go that far. I would basically. So you can see my thoughts. Because I'd like people to see that. I don't want them to see my text. That's actual work. If my brain's doing. I'm like, I can't control that.

[Brett]

Right.

[John Holmberg]

But if I had. Yeah, I might text and things like that. I'm not handing over messages to other people. That's private, but public. Like, for me, if I'm driving down the road and I just see, you know, Brett giving a hand job to a homeless guy, I'm gonna watch that. I'm gonna rewind that and laugh for hours and show you.

[Announcer]

Yeah, but your texts are part of your brain, so you.

[John Holmberg]

It's gonna come through.

[Announcer]

You gotta think about what you're texting. So now.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I wouldn't have to text anymore.

[Announcer]

Yeah, but your brain's still gotta do it. So if neuralinks reading it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, the random thoughts will get me thrown in jail. Yeah.

[Brett]

Screwed.

[John Holmberg]

Just driving. The things I think about, the people in the cars near me. Terrible link.

[Brett]

Would last all of two minutes. We're gonna have to put you away.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. You. You, sir, a psychopath coat. Yeah, I would probably. Yeah. I mean, it literally put me on the freeway at rush hour and I'm. I'd kill hundreds of people in my brain. I do it all the time and I imagine their deaths big time.

[Brett]

It's like plugging in Call of Duty or grand theft.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I think I would. I think I'd still be interested in it just to see how it got away. I'd be like the Neil Armstrong of it. It's gonna happen. We're eventually gonna end up with it. So I don't think. I think I would do it. It's bigger than just your phone, you know, and we've already given up so much of ourselves with the phone. It's not like everybody sits next. Like, no way. They. They've got every keystroke you've ever made.

[Announcer]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

So it's. And it's all stored in that giant place in Utah. We've already given it up. You know, ask the dude who's on trail for dismembering his wife. He didn't know that they had the ability to go see what he's watched on pornhub. They found it in a day. It's like, yeah, this is what he likes.

[Brett]

Everyone owns duct tape.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And a hatchet and shovel and a mask and a shovel. He bought all the plastic bags. What are you doing there, Todd? It's New Year's Eve. Nothing.

[Announcer]

Just landscaping.

[Brett]

Just. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Get a lot of fun projects. I'm off for a couple more days. And is Anna helping you out? No, no, no. She's. I think she's at her mother's. I haven't seen her for a couple days. I don't know. Dishes are piling up. We'll see.

[Brett]

She's tied up.

[John Holmberg]

Yes. She's a busy gal. I don't see her as much as I used to. I think we should all get used to not seeing her a lot. She said she's going to stay real busy. Anyway, I gotta go. Then he digs a hole, and they still can't find her. He was so sloppy with searching out how to kill her and how to get rid of her that they saw all of it and they still don't know where she is. That was the one thing he was great at, is the hiding spot.

Pretty awesome.

[Brett]

And that was by mistake.

[John Holmberg]

And that was probably just the only thing he didn't search. He's like, nobody will ever look. He's like, it's probably like Easter eggs at that guy's house. Nobody's found in years. He's a good hider, but he's really bad searching details. And if you went to that point, wouldn't you just say, look, I cut her up, put her in a bag. I don't remember where she is, but I have a pretty good idea. Like, wouldn't you just give in at that point? Yeah, I would do that. I would. It's almost game tape. You know, you go home, you got the neural link in your head, and you have a day, and then you go home and like, all right, let's take a look at today and see what I could have done better. And you just watch your day back and review. Yeah, it was a bad conversation. I came off as a real jackass there. I need to. I apologize to that guy tomorrow. And then you just go back and see who you need to say you're sorry. To. And then you go through your thoughts file.

[Brett]

Well, there's a whole day of saying, I'm sorry.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that would be a whole day. Every day of going, you know, I reviewed my tape yesterday, and wow, I was a real dickhead to you. I apologize.

[Brett]

Thank you.

[John Holmberg]

That means a lot to me.

[Announcer]

Well, you.

[John Holmberg]

You could apologize too, you know, and then later that day. I shouldn't have gone that far. I gotta apologize again. Right after I go through the thoughts file. And then that would be the worst part is, like, if women at work, and you're talking to them and stuff, and then they're like, let's take a look at your neural link. And we had that conversation. I'm like, probably not the best idea. All right, let's go. And then you put your thoughts, like.

[Brett]

The old commercial where they challenge flag on arguments. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You make the call.

[Brett]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

And then the whole time she's. You're remembering the conversation. She's got like, a broomstick in her. Because you imagined her doing horrible stuff to herself while she was talking about that boring topic of whether or not this client's coming over or what you've got to do.

And then maybe I would manipulate neuralink and think crazy things on purpose just to show you idiots I could make neuralink work. All right, I'm on the list. I volunteer for it. I'm in 100%.

I got nothing to hide. Except that thing last night when I searched. How long does it take for roofies to kick in? That can get you in trouble. That's a lot of explaining. Yeah, I've never. I've been poisoned once before. Drinking, it was vodka, and I ended up in a picnic table in San Jose. That's a true story. Or it was weird.

[Announcer]

Do you know?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I did not know my way out of where I was. I don't know how I got where I was, but I know. And my friend was poisoned as well, and he got lost, I think. We got picked up and dropped off at a park. My. My. No blood anus was intact.

[Brett]

You had a nice little nap.

[John Holmberg]

I felt fine. I slept on a picnic table for a while. A Mexican ground crew woke me up. I don't know how the people I was with found me because I was, like, four miles from the venue. We started at. I don't know how it happened. And we drove home and both of us looked at each other and said, we didn't drink that much. We're better at drinking than this. And that was the only time when I'm like, this is not a normal. Have you ever been roofied?

[Announcer]

No, it's.

[John Holmberg]

It's not that bad. She has. Yeah. She. She and I were talking about it. That's one time that she got hit, and she's been. It was a couple, wasn't it? She's got hit twice, I think. Weren't you there for one of them?

[Announcer]

I. Yeah, it was right after. Right after the week after my mom passed, and I showed up, and she's being hauled away, and I'm like, what the.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's right. She, like, went out at the bar.

[Announcer]

She was there just hanging out. She wasn't working or anything. She was just hanging out.

[John Holmberg]

I forgot about that.

[Brett]

Wow.

[John Holmberg]

Well, the tactical black, that's. We've talked about that. One of the things they tell the women all the time is, never ever leave your drink alone.

[Brett]

Tara Reid said that.

[John Holmberg]

Well, Tara Reid is a perfect example. Just never ever drink. Never ever leave your drink is. Yeah. Don't ever have it out of. Don't ever have anybody. If somebody brings you one. Hey, I bought you a drink that you don't know. You don't, don't. Yeah. Even sometimes the ones you do know. It's crazy.

[Announcer]

I got a friend that she. When she goes to a bar, she won't drink anything but bottled beer. So she can keep her thumb.

[John Holmberg]

Thumb over the top.

[Announcer]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Smart. Yeah. Keep it in the bottle. But some people, like, they'll bring a drink to you. I got two for the ladies, and then put them down there and, like, never drink those. The only people that I could figure would have poisoned me were Katie and the Hobbs, because at the end of the night, they wanted to do a shot. And I've never done a pickleback before, and I. I loved it. It was phenomenal. It's Jameson's followed by pickle juice was great. I don't think they'd poison me. Maybe now. No, they wouldn't poison me. Right. I don't eat. I don't know.

[Announcer]

But maybe it's DJ Beth Sheba.

[John Holmberg]

I didn't drink with her. That got nothing from them. There's John Gordon. Hey. That little prick.

[Announcer]

Maybe it was Larry.

[John Holmberg]

Did Larry get a. One of them green drinks?

[Announcer]

They didn't have it. Oh, he was just drinking water.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Larry.

[Announcer]

It was Tripp.

[John Holmberg]

Did Tripp get a green drink?

[Announcer]

No, he might have tripped.

[John Holmberg]

He might have poisoned you just so I would. Yeah. I'll find him laying on the ground later. Yeah. Then he's mine. Oh, Ass up my favorite way.

[Brett]

Look what I found.

[John Holmberg]

Look what I made.

I did wake up with gray hairs all over me. Well, there you go. God damn it. I just thought I was getting older. They brushed right off.

Did someone. Did someone cover me in loose cotton?

[Brett]

Get a Bel Air CC imprint on your forehead?

[John Holmberg]

This is mark of Zorro. You've been country clubbed anyway. If you've ever been roofied, be careful. I don't. That was. It's weird, but I'm pretty sure I got hit because I don't. I don't have that issue where I just go like, oh God, spin. Had a little euphoria and then I was out.

I don't know what happened, but my ass feels okay. So no matter what they did.

I'm going to the doctor for it to have him go. Did you ever notice that your ass was bigger than it? No, I didn't. And I don't need to know that now, so.

[Announcer]

Well, it wasn't Lex Steele that roofied you, right?

[John Holmberg]

At least it was a small man.

[Brett]

You would have known.

[John Holmberg]

At least it was a man who left me. It must have been one of those Native American guys from that band because they left me the way they found me. They only footprints and took only memories.

I don't know. But I worried about it. I feel fine now. But it wasn't good. Wasn't a normal thing. And that's the last thing about last night I remember was just disappearing out.

[Announcer]

Maybe it's disgraced Dr. Jordan cut after you.

[John Holmberg]

I don't think so. Although he would have access to. That's what I'm saying.

[Brett]

He did have that satchel with him.

[John Holmberg]

He does true carries that little person.

[Announcer]

He had his Indiana Jones satchel with him.

[John Holmberg]

It's not Indiana Jones.

Not gay.

[Announcer]

I was trying to be nice to him.

[John Holmberg]

That is not Indiana. He wears that fanny pack. Yeah, it's a fanny pack up on his chest.

Like a bandolier too. He doesn't.

[Brett]

When he came in I thought. Oh, his arms in a.

[Announcer]

That's what I thought.

[John Holmberg]

I did too. There were several times the night I almost asked him, what'd you do? Oh yeah, it's your stupid fanny pack.

[Brett]

But it's not like it's. There's no room in it. It is packed.

[John Holmberg]

It's full.

[Brett]

Yeah, he's suspect number one.

[John Holmberg]

We have to go through that pill bottles in there.

[Brett]

There's so much stuff. What's the.

[John Holmberg]

What was the reasoning? We parted ways. He can't get into where I'm going. Well, just got in a little bit later. Yeah, but he had to sneak in and I don't know that he did it. Well, if he did, Jordan's a small penis disgraced doctor because I don't feel a thing.

I got. I got no feelings at all back there. Let me push a little and see if there's any, like, bruising. At the very least, nothing. All right, well, if Dr. Jordan raped me, then good on him. I hope you had a nice time. There's no evidence of it here.

So. And if you do, you know, roofing me, make it count, you know, the next day, at least make him walk with a. Make me limp. Make me. Yeah, Leave a bruise.

Noted. I'll keep that in my notes. Bruise the boy. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? 585 9, 800. A good one. While you search your Internet and we'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up. Arizona's most powerful, powerful rock radio station station.

[Commercial Voice 2]

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