12-09-25 - FULL SHOW - TUESDAY - Holmbergs Morning Sickness 98 KUPD

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness (98 KUPD), Dec 9, 2025 – Full Show (Tuesday)

Episode Overview

The December 9, 2025 episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness is a high-energy, fast-paced dive into the irreverent humor and pointed commentary that characterizes John Holmberg and his crew (Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo). Touching on topics from sports and bar scandals to environmentalism and viral internet drama, the show blends local Arizona news, national controversies, personal anecdotes, and banter, always leaning into a mix of satire, dark humor, and genuine opinion.

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Key Topics & Discussion Points

1. Harbaugh Hate, NFL Ref Shenanigans, and Sports Betting

• Harbaugh Brothers Rant

  • Time: 02:56–04:43
    John unleashes a tirade about his deep dislike for the Harbaugh brothers (Jim and John), referencing their "smug" demeanors and laying out an elaborate wish list of fictional mishaps for them ("I'd prefer if it was a plane or a train or a large bus...").

    "The Harbaughs are C words... My phone corrects [Harbaugh] to garbage. Even my phone knows that these people are miserable, horrible, horrible human beings."
    — John Holmberg [03:34]

• NFL Gambling Conspiracies

  • Time: 06:38–08:03
    John speculates on officiating controversies and how the rise in legal, ubiquitous sports betting increases the likelihood of game-fixing, even speculating about Olympic events like archery being rigged due to obscurity and low oversight.

• US Athletes in Minor Sports

  • Time: 08:19–10:35
    The group riffs on obscure Olympic sports and how American competitors are virtually unknown, joking that only “Robin Hood and Ted Nugent” come to mind as archers.

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2. Tempe Tavern Scandal & Underage Drinking

• Tempe Tavern Underage Drinking Busts

  • Time: 12:16–23:59
    The show discusses Tempe Tavern’s two recent police raids for hosting hundreds of underage drinkers. The hosts highlight the owner's comically bad PR defense:

    "We here at the Tempe Tavern take underage drinking very seriously. Yes, you do. You most certainly do. And you're great at it."
    — John Holmberg [13:27]

• Fake ID Economy

  • The team jokes Tempe Tavern has a side hustle making/selling fake IDs, complete with parental pickup lines, and nostalgia about their own fake ID attempts.

  "The IDs are so good now, you could travel with it."
  — John Holmberg [20:25]

• Bar Accountability & Law Enforcement

  • They mock the bar’s claim that police should notify them about investigations, comparing it to murderers demanding a heads-up.

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3. Prison Mail, Contraband, and Cop Humor

• Prison Letter Ban Discussion

  • Time: 24:48–30:36
    The crew discusses a new Arizona prison policy banning physical mail due to contraband, with John skewering a mother’s complaints about the loss of personal connection:

    "You cut off communication...when you committed the crime…You’re not owed anything."
    — John Holmberg [25:56]

• Creative Contraband Delivery

  • References to drones dropping steak, lobster, and drugs to inmates, and a former cop’s bleak “fentanyl nuke” solution for the drug epidemic.

• Cynicism About Reform

  • John highlights how working in law enforcement leads to a uniquely dark humor, with a focus on how difficult, sometimes futile, reform efforts really are.

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4. Environmentalism, Recycling Scams & Littering "Campaign"

• Littering as Protest

  • Time: 46:35–71:58 (recurring throughout episode)
    John unveils his tongue-in-cheek "Holmberg Littering Campaign," meant to draw attention to what he describes as the sham of American recycling programs.

    "I'm going to start a new jobs program where the city can take our taxes to clean up all the trash I shoot out my car window. I think it's brilliant."
    — John Holmberg [53:21]

• Recycling System Critique

  • John details logistical flaws and hypocrisy in recycling rules, arguing that the US is only 4% of the world population and can’t offset pollution from countries like India and China by "sorting milk jugs."
  • Guests and listeners email in—one from the City of Phoenix—insisting there are sorters, but Trip Reeb (their boss) pops in on air to reveal Hubbard Radio stopped recycling years ago, and the cleaning crew just dumps everything together.

• Windmill Blades, Tesla Batteries, and Green Energy Irony

  • The crew express disbelief over how supposedly eco-friendly products (wind turbine blades, car batteries) end up as non-recyclable, buried trash.

• Listener Letters & Barbs

  • John reads listener Kelly's email asking why he's so "mad at the environment," fueling his comedic, semi-sincere campaign for visible, intentional litter to force real discussion.

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5. Current Events & Viral Outrage

• Cinnabon Racist Incident

  • Time: 127:10–137:47
    The team reviews new footage and GoFundMe drama surrounding a Cinnabon employee caught on camera using racial slurs. John lampoons the viral hysteria and notes the irony of the woman raising $120,000+ online for her legal fees:

    "The N-word girl has like a couple hundred thousand bucks—she lost her job at Cinnabon...and they gave it to her in a weekend because she called the customer the N word."
    — John Holmberg [96:29]

• GoFundMe & Outrage Economics

  • John notes that controversial virality pays outsized rewards, comparing the racist Cinnabon worker’s windfall to the struggles of ordinary folks.

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6. Bizarre News, Popular Culture & Listener Interaction

• News Oddities
  • Canadian uses a snowblower in neighbor dispute, pantsless drunken woman walks down a Florida street, and inmates in France wear regular clothes.
• Brady’s History & Fun Facts
  • Red Vineyard at Aries is the only Van Gogh to sell in his lifetime; Dramamine was invented by accident, etc.
• Email Banter
  • Listeners write in to debate, fact-check, or support show points, often fueling new tangents or jokes.

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7. AI & Music, New Releases, and Holiday Bits

• AI Covers

  • Time: 149:57 onward
    Brett plays AI-generated Motown versions of “Enjoy the Silence” and Hotel California, riffing on how AI is already providing what listeners want—sometimes more than live musicians.

• Christmas Music & Viral Lists

  • Kylie Minogue’s “Hot in December” and Luke Spiller’s Christmas song are reviewed (“Christmas song = trash”), alongside stats about the most played jukebox tracks (AC/DC, Skynyrd, Eminem).

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Notable Quotes & Moments

• Harbaugh Rant [03:34]:
  “The Harbaughs are C words...Even my phone knows that these people are miserable, horrible, horrible human beings.”
  — John Holmberg

• Tempe Tavern's PR Statement [13:27]:
  “We here at the Tempe Tavern take underage drinking very seriously. Yes, you do—and you’re great at it.”
  — John Holmberg

• Recycling Skepticism [53:21]:
  “I’m going to start a new jobs program where the city can take our taxes to clean up all the trash I shoot out my car window. I think it’s brilliant.”
  — John Holmberg

• Trip Reeb's Intervention [115:56]:
  "We don't recycle because we don't care. We don't have Hubbard print because we know it doesn't [work]."
  — Trip Reeb

• Cinnabon Outrage [96:29]:
  “The N-word girl has like a couple hundred thousand bucks—she lost her job at Cinnabon...and they gave it to her in a weekend because she called the customer the N word.”
  — John Holmberg

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Memorable Timestamps

• 00:00–02:20 – Sponsor plugs, intros, and quick banter
• 02:20–07:56 – NFL/Harbaugh brothers/Sports gambling conversation
• 12:16–24:11 – Tempe Tavern underage busts/fake ID economy
• 24:48–30:36 – Prison letters, contraband, and police humor
• 46:35–71:58 – Recycling, environmentalism, and Holmberg’s littering campaign
• 127:10–137:47 – Cinnabon racist incident and GoFundMe economics
• 149:57–158:12 – Music, AI, and holiday hilarity

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Language & Tone

True to the show’s name, expect dark humor, sarcasm, local references, and a willingness to offend or push boundaries—often on purpose to provoke discussion or laughter. The overall language is raw, informal, and very direct, echoing the comedic, counter-mainstream ethos of the hosts.

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For First-Time Listeners

This episode is a showcase of what makes Holmberg’s Morning Sickness a leading Arizona radio show: no-holds-barred comedy, sharp local commentary, and a refusal to take anything—including the show itself—too seriously. Expect quick pivots, playful cruelty, and real time audience engagement with emails and calls. If easily offended, you may want to brace yourself.

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Core Segments & Takeaways

1. Sports & Satire:

• The mix of genuine sports fandom and comedic rants sets the tone for a day’s “us vs. them” banter.

2. Arizona Oddities:

• Local scandals—Tempe Tavern, city recycling—are front and center, often becoming fodder for larger cultural critiques.

3. Viral Outrage Deconstruction:

• The crew tears into social media echo chambers (Cinnabon, GoFundMe) with equal parts mockery and exasperation.

4. Absurdism as Commentary:

• The “littering campaign” isn’t really about trash—it’s about exposing performative solutions to real societal problems.

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Final Word:
With adrenaline, absurdity, and Arizona attitude, this episode delivers the full Holmberg experience—whether you agree with his takes or just tune in for the ride.

Transcript

[Brett Vesely]

You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. Hey, it's Brett Vesely and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?

[Brady]

Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at.

[John Holmberg]

Risk and come into M and P.

[Brady]

Guns where he'll get a fair offer.

[John Holmberg]

And he can rest easy knowing it's.

[Brady]

Not getting into the wrong hands.

[Brett Vesely]

Okay, but what if he lives out of state?

[John Holmberg]

Easy legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it online. It really that simple?

[Brett Vesely]

There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms.

[Brady]

Hey, what's up?

[John Holmberg]

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[Brady]

Live it.

[John Holmberg]

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Good morning, everybody. Hello there. Welcome to Tuesday. It's 5:45. My name is John. Hello. There's Brady. There's Brett. There's big Dick Toledo. There's his homework's morning sickness. Ready to go for another glorious day. It's freeze. I'm keeping my ski cap on because I came in with the top down and my body, my body, my body won't cool off or like it's not doing it right. I'm frozen like a crackhead's credit. It's. I got chilies. It's like 44 out there. It's jelly.

[Brett Vesely]

You do look like Chappelle with the beanie on.

[John Holmberg]

You got in the crack.

[Brady]

You got some rocks.

[John Holmberg]

Reminds me, somebody emailed me and said, I love that you've compared Lamar Jackson to Sandra Bernhardt, but don't you think he's more like Pooty Tang? And all I said back was sedate my Demis. It's exactly who he looks like. It's very good. But almost had a perfect football weekend where two Harbaughs were sad. Almost had double sad Harbaughs, but we couldn't get that double sad Harbos are. It's a tough one. It's like a double rainbow. You can't. You can't make all the Harbaugh sad in one day. But boy, you know, it's fun when you get a. You get a weekend where you've got that gaping open mouth, hillbilly Jim Harbaugh over there in la, who I don't think he's capable of closing his mouth. And then John Harbaugh over there in Baltimore. And the Harbaughs are C words. That's the old. Like, they should have their pictures in the dictionary next to the C word and just say C. Harbaugh. My favorite thing last night is I realized I was texting terrible things about the Harbaughs and their family and things I wish would happen. And it didn't. It didn't. Wasn't, so far as, you know, wishing colds on them, but it was more like cancer, Lou Gehrig's rape, all sorts of terrible things wished upon the Harbaughs through texts from another Harbaugh hater. And I realized that when I misspell Harbaugh, my phone corrects to garbage. Even my phone knows that these people are miserable, horrible, horrible human beings.

And, like, I don't want them to get hit by a car or anything. I'd prefer if it was a plane or a train or a large bus or semi truck, not a car. That might create hero status.

I'd like them to eat something.

[Brady]

Survival.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I'd like to eat, like, go to a restaurant and eat something that potentially had an explosive in it. That's the kind of like, this is tasty. That's a Harbaugh. I hate them passionately. Sports creates that. And it's their fault that I feel this way. And I have no issues saying it out loud. It doesn't bother me at all. Not at all. So almost. Almost a perfect Harbaugh weekend. But I don't ever mind seeing Brad Zit do well because he's banging Madison Beer and that keeps pictures of her in the TMZ and stuff like that. I like Justin Herbert. And then seeing the Eagles lose means that they're sad Eagle fans. It's a really. The mix of hate I have that brings joy into my life is very. It's a tapestry of hate and beauty and all combined. Never feel better. But, yeah, I was a little upset last night. Went to overtime. I thought the Eagles were going to knock him out.

[Brett Vesely]

And Eagles fan travel. Well, there was. There was a lot of Eagles fans.

[John Holmberg]

There are no Charger fans in Los Angeles, so it's. They sell tickets to everybody. Get out of Philly. Yeah, well, that's true, too, but they go ruin another city. But Herbert. Don't feel sorry for Herbert. Last night was a fun game, and then he went to go bang Madison Beer afterwards, and that's a. That's a fantastic kill for Brad Zit. I think he's. He's really got it together. I like that. So, yeah, I got no beef with that. I'd like to have Brad Zit on my team. I think he's pretty solid. I just. I just can't stand when they show and they seem to manage to show Harbaugh's face. Maybe they just never looked that bad. I saw him, John Harbaugh, in Dallas at the Super bowl in 2012, and he was at the Kennedy Museum. And I was going in and he was coming out, and I just remember going, ugh, like, out loud, like, there's John Harbaugh. And he just walked by with his smug little Harbaugh face, and I just thought, oh, maybe you'll walk into the road. And he didn't. I was rooting for it, but he, he's still here. It was a rough one, but yeah, we'll start again, try again next week for that beautiful double Harbaugh bashing. And the NFL is in trouble there. Pete Carroll might be asking if Pete Carroll made any money on bets. Boy, I watched that thing again and there was a big story about that pass and field goal at the end of the Raiders and Broncos game. And they got the, the refs might be in on it cause they called a weird penalty that got em in field goal range and then the spread was seven and a half. The field goal cut it to seven and then the game ended. There was no reason for a field goal.

[Brady]

And it was so many people mad investigation.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's so bad. Well, it's gonna get looked into for sure. But I'm assuming the NFL will have enough to make this disappear. But all this gambling that's involved, it's inevitable. It's inevitable that eventually a game gets fixed. It is inevitable that when a full sports book is in your hand at all times, you don't even need a bookie anymore. You got one. You are your own bookie. It's right there in your paw. It's inevitable that something happens to. I mean it's already happened in baseball and basketball. We'll see if football's alive. We don't know about hockey yet because people it's always last one. It's probably the one doing it the most because nobody's looking. But it'll be fun. I wonder if the Olympics get hit this year because there'll be Olympic gambling. And now that everybody's got these little handheld gambling sports books, wonder if the Olympics with some of the lesser than.

[Brady]

Go down on your final run.

[John Holmberg]

If I know there's archery bets and I'm an archer and I'm you know, like pride of the country. Like yeah, yeah. Some guy says, hey, toss a couple up in the upper right corner and then ski over to this thing and do it again. Be like, ah, it's not a bad idea. We're two or three hundred thousand dollars. Nobody's ever gonna remember your arching ass.

[Brady]

They'd have to tap the Nordic guy.

[John Holmberg]

On that one dominate. They just like it. And I think those countries actually give them. They get pray. They're like Michael Jordan when they go home, they the American archer. Name one. Geena Davis is the only one. And the only reason you know her is because. And that was summertime. I'M talking about those cross country.

[Brady]

I don't know the one.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, and they're not archers.

[Brady]

We have one of the top female archers.

[John Holmberg]

You don't know anything about that. You know.

Stop. Stop talking. You don't know any of that. No, you don't. You heard once we have a good archer and you're carrying it around like you have a piece of information. See? Nothing. You know nothing.

[Brett Vesely]

The only two archers I know is Robin Hood and Ted Nugent.

[John Holmberg]

That. That's well put. Joe Rogan in there, too.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, is he? Is he one too?

[John Holmberg]

Okay, but then you got to. What? I'm thinking of that other thing where you ski and then you shoot and you ski. Shoot. Nobody knows who those guys are. And don't say you do, Brady, because they're embarrassing.

[Brady]

It's always the Nordic guys, right?

[John Holmberg]

But they go home and they're heroes. The American dude doing that. Nothing.

[Brady]

Never there.

[John Holmberg]

Nothing. He's there. There's the problem. You don't even know if he's there. So who's going to notice if the American guy has an off day and starts plugging the upper right of the thing and he tells you, here's the time I can manufacture. Now, if I'm really humping it, I'm gonna get through that whole shooting decathlon in about two hours or whatever it takes. But I can make it 2 hours and 35 minutes. Give you the over. Under on me, I said. And then probably I can hit no bullseyes at all. I'd be like, oh, if you can find a prop bet on that, you make a billion dollars on that stupid sport where you ski and shoot.

[Brady]

Brady Ellison.

[John Holmberg]

His name's Brady Ellison.

[Brett Vesely]

He's considered the US's best.

[John Holmberg]

There you go. And don't act like you knew that. Brady. Stop it.

[Brady]

I didn't.

[John Holmberg]

No. Okay, good. Started to say we got one of the world's best archers.

[Brady]

I thought our female archers.

[John Holmberg]

You don't know that either. Making my point for me. Saying things like that without names or anything specific. We don't know anything about archers.

[Brett Vesely]

Okay, here's the best female archer.

[John Holmberg]

She's a Casey cough. Hold on. She's a phenom. First US woman to reach world number one. That's great. Just now learning about it. And guess what? It'll be the last time I ever pay attention to it.

Even if she's the world's greatest archer, no one will care. And also, she's not hot.

[Brady]

Whoa.

[John Holmberg]

So turn that.

[Brett Vesely]

That is a dude in that picture.

[John Holmberg]

She got no chance to be famous. She can be the world's greatest something or other. And people will go, turn it. It doesn't matter. Even if Mike Tirico's there going, you've never seen archery this magical in your life. And then they go, oh, geez, this might be good. And then they show her. You're like, turn it. Turn it to reruns of anything else. Put that Puff Daddy documentary back on.

[Brady]

You're going to. You have to make the money on the figure skating. Her, they can wipe out.

[John Holmberg]

She'd ruin figures. Oh, yeah, and they could have. Those guys can manufacture a loss. But it'd be tougher. It'd be tougher to, like, if you could say, I don't know how you can prop bet that, but I think the Olympics are a ripe target for all this gambling because the big boy sports are going to be tougher. More eyes on individuals. You know those people. We see them again next week. People who are, like, just skiing, like, oh, I'll turn that corner and I'll eat about two minutes in. And maybe the.

[Brady]

The snow cross. Stuff like that where they have races together in the.

[John Holmberg]

And then you see, I don't even know what that is. The one where they're. They're motorbike and down the hills and stuff. Yeah, but I love that.

[Brady]

And then they do it on the snowboards.

[John Holmberg]

Like 12 or 15 of them at once. That's fun. But if you just have a. Like, I bet a million dollars on a Did not finish and it's a top fiverr. Huge. It's possible. We'll see, though. But the Broncos and Raiders are doing it, and the refs are in on it. The Olympics. Who's going to notice? Awesome judge score.

[Brady]

Easy, Easy.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Get a judge. This is easy. Won't win the gold, that's for sure. Or will win the gold because some guy's pumping it up a little and get in trouble for it. But big deal. Speaking of getting in trouble, I gotta hand it to the Tempe Tavern. You see those pricks? Twice they've been raided. Hundreds. And I'm not making that up. Hundreds of underage drinkers at one time cited or arrested for underage drinking at the tavern. Once earlier this year and once again in November 230 on the last Tempe Tavern raid. And what did they do? They wiped the bar stools down, they wiped the countertops down, and they pulled that little chain on that neon sign that says open and they went right back at it. The news showed up at the tavern Yesterday. And it's my favorite phrase ever because I always look for nuance. And what the owner said on the news was hilarious because it means two things. If you hear it the way it's, you know, PR's been heard, he said it. Right. But if you hear it the way John listens, it was a wink and a nod. We here at the Tempe Tavern take underage drinking very seriously. Yes, you do. You most certainly do. And you're great at it.

They're blaming the police for not telling them they were gonna do this.

What you doing? You tell anyone? She tells us you were an ongoing investigation. We just stopped serving the kids. Come on. It's the cops fault. It says the first. This is the first time they're hearing from the Tempe Tavern since the police released details of the drinking busts and all. And there was a hit and run back in early November. It says the bar sent a lengthy statement, and they basically were saying, hey, if the cops are investigating you, shouldn't they tell you? Then I'd have cleaned it up.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, I agree.

[John Holmberg]

The bar sent a lengthy statement to Arizona's family saying they were never given notice of any concern from Tempe or the Liquor Board. So they kept serving the teens. Nobody was telling them it was wrong. Come on. Anyway, the reason I murdered my wife, sir, is because I didn't know. A cop didn't tell me. I couldn't.

[Brett Vesely]

The balls in the Tempe Police Department. I mean, what are you doing over there?

[John Holmberg]

Investigating you behind your back. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.

They raided the popular bar twice this year.

[Brady]

It's tough enough asking for IDs.

[John Holmberg]

Exactly. It takes forever. You gotta line out the door. You got the paycheck. Just let them in.

[Brett Vesely]

It's cold out there.

[John Holmberg]

Push that stroller right over here. We'll get him a cool one.

Tempe Tavern fired back Monday saying the numbers are wrong. Officers only arrested a couple people and the rest were just citations for underage drinking arrests.

The bar leadership said the establishment was never cited, which is a weird thing that they got to open up again. Says they've also addressed the police post linking the hit and run to their establishment. Well, that's part of bar ownership. You can't overserve and have somebody go run someone down. That's true at your house, by the way. You have a party at your house and someone drives away and kills someone, you got a liability problem.

The police haven't even passed.

[Brady]

If a kid gets in with a fake id.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that.

[Brady]

That's the Bar's fault.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. For sure. You gotta.

[Brady]

You know, you couldn't.

[John Holmberg]

There's a reason why there's signs that say we ID under 30. They basically are telling you, don't get on our ass.

[Brady]

Give you the. Then they give you the fake ID that is just.

[Brett Vesely]

You're still supposed to be able to.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Figure it out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And if you miss one, they'll probably go ahead. Keep an eye on this. 236 in one night. You're not paying attention. One of the kids just had a crayon and a piece of paper that said, I am 21, and drew a picture of himself from Missouri. That's pretty neat.

[Brady]

Just out of safety. You want to get everyone inside. You can't have a lion.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's right up against the road. Brady's right. It's for the kids safety.

[Brett Vesely]

That's right.

[John Holmberg]

We're always talking about kids safety. Get them inside, strapping them up in cars with car seats till they're 11. Jesus Christ. These kids would have been standing outside. Tempe Tavern. Cares about your kids.

It's hilarious. That is my favorite sentence for a bar that's been hit two times and had. Okay, Tempe Tavern. I'll go with you. Hundreds of citations and two different incidents.

[Brady]

The biggest complaint I heard was the drive line to pick the kids.

[John Holmberg]

It's like the Dutch brothers. It's brutal. Yeah. When the moms have to come get them. It's not. It looks like an Uber line, but it's just their parents.

[Brett Vesely]

The bouncers are out there. So how you doing today? Seen any good movies?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, just like a Tempo. What are you up to? We take underage drinking very seriously. They're going for the record is what I hear there.

I want to go to the Tempe Tavern. If it wasn't for, like, getting arrested for leering at Youth, I'd love to drink there. That. That place takes underage drinking very seriously.

Morning sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible.

Holmberg's morning sickness.

You know who's happy about. And you know what? I'm guessing it's a double business. Tempe Tavern is getting busted for giving you alcohol. My guess is this is just speculation, but I could be right. And I'm sorry. Tempe Tavern. Let. Let. I'm not investigating you. I know you guys like to know when that's going on, so I bet you that they also have a side business. Making fake IDs or selling them back. You know, now that the Cops took their fake. They can make fake IDs now. So they sell them to the. Because now there's 500 kids without fake IDs over these last two raids. They're gonna need to go to the Tempe Tavern. Extra couple bucks under the. Under the coat, under your. You know, maybe it's even under your binky when you put it down to order. And, yeah, another $100 per ID.

[Brett Vesely]

That's good business.

[John Holmberg]

That's. That's thousands. Tempe Tavern doesn't need to. Let me just say this from experience.

[Brady]

When my son was down in Tucson.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

They got bulk rates, so they all got two IDs.

[John Holmberg]

They are legit IDs. Nice. His shows our address in Seattle. Nice. His actual birth date, but the right.

[Brady]

One to make him 21.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady]

And it's his name.

[John Holmberg]

So if he were questioned, even if he knows how to answer all the. Know how to answer all those questions. Because the big old question, it's got the bar. Right. The barcode on the back. Back. No kidding. As a. As a bartender back in the day. But I was for old people, because Tony Roma's true in the old. Occasionally, unlike a Tuesday, two girls would wander. And I remember my. My old buddy Jim Ortiz. The other bartender's like, watch this. He goes, they'll give me IDs, but they're terrible. And they hand over these IDs, and they were like. One was like, this girl's mother, like, she found her old idea.

[Brett Vesely]

She's, like, 47 or something.

[John Holmberg]

And the other one was a Chinese black man. I'm like, I don't think this is you, Theresa. But. And then they say each other's names, and it was nothing. So he would make them virgin daiquiris because they always ordered daiquiris, and they were never alcohol, and they'd walk out drunk, and it was one of the funniest. He goes, if they ever got tested, we didn't give him anything, so we're in the clear. He goes, little lesson for you, but I would ID every once in a while, and I knew a minute that someone got ID'd, and they'd be like, oh, my God, I can't believe you're IDing me. Like, she's 12. Like, nobody. Everybody, just give me my drink. Here's my id. So it was one of the questions that I always asked was, oh, we have the same birthday. What's. I'm not doing. What's your sign? What's our sign?

And I don't know the correct Answer. But if they even hesitate, everybody knows their sign. It's annoyingly. Like I said, I think we're Leos, aren't we?

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Or I would look and go, that's my birthday too. We're fellow Leos, and they were born in, like, March. I'm like, yeah, like, you're done. No, they're out. You're out. But it was very rare at Tony Rome, so. Tempe Tavern. Looking around, I'm like, can I help you with your homework? Ooh, long division vision. You need a beer. This is great.

[Brady]

Days of the peeling up ID are way gone, though.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. It's id.

[Brady]

He could travel with it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh. Oh, it's. They're great fake ideas. Ours was just peel up an old one and put a new picture. Put a new picture underneath and then glue it. Oh, no, you ironed it. Well, you tried to iron it. There was a lot of burn marks on id.

We at the Tempe Tavern take underage drinking very seriously. If you haven't had two, you're not doing it right.

Great job, Tempe Tavern.

All hail the Tempe Tavern. And let's all not clutch our pearls about this. There was an accident. That's terrible, but that could happen. Age or underage. And also, we all, except Brady, raise our pints to the place that used to be pretty lax about underage drinking because we loved it. There's gonna be collateral damage. And unfortunately in this case, it was pretty damn bad. But that kid was gonna drink somewhere. She was wanting drinks. They found the tavern. They're gonna get in trouble for it. But they haven't linked them together yet. Cause you don't know if that chick was stoned on top of it all. And then what?

I love it. They wrote a letter back, hey, cops. How dare you do an investigation of our illegal activities without letting us know. We just straighten that right up.

A murderer. It's like, evidently I was under investigation the entire time for this murder, and that took me off guard. I didn't like that at.

Usually, I know, you know, not a cop either, but pretty sure the idea of an investigation is to not let the person you're investigating know you're there.

You know, that'd be nice. Just kind of track you for a little bit. Make sure you're, you know, with a body parts you're hiding. It's like I'm watching you. The cops are gonna pretty me. If you know you're being watched, you're probably not gonna do terrible things when A cop is behind you on the freeway, you do the speed limit. You know you're being watch. My argument against religion. Nobody actually believes God's watching all the time or they wouldn't do anything bad. If your dad was in the bedroom with you at all times, you'd never beat off and just go, well, I'm human. It's not. It's not a viable excuse.

[Brady]

I don't know. Eventually you'd say, dad, turn around.

[John Holmberg]

No, you wouldn't. If your dad was in the room, you'd keep your thumb out of your ass. I guarantee it. For your whole life. You'd be all pent up and frustrated. But you're not gonna start beating off if Dad's all. If you know you're being watched all the time, you're not going to do anything bad. There's no excuse. Well, I make mistakes. Nuh. And that's where Tempe Tavern's like. We'd have done so much better had we known. A little North Korea would have been nice. Tell me when I'm being watched all the time.

[Brett Vesely]

My rights have been violated.

[John Holmberg]

I feel like I should sue you. I'm doing an investigation. You. How does that feel? Tempe Tavern. The balls on the tavern. They should just have a set of giant balls. You tap as you walk in, like. Like you're playing a Notre Dame football game.

[Brett Vesely]

John, who's the attorney for Tempe Tavern? Saul Goodman or what?

[John Holmberg]

They've got a good guy.

I'll fight for you, Albuquerque. They're definitely going to push this to the limits. And I think the story is going to get better, so let me just let them know. Tempe Tavern. I got my eyes on you. Let me just let you know before you get up. What are you looking at? They're basically saying that.

Do you have high chairs? Of course we got high chairs. We're a bar. Come on in.

[Brady]

Who wouldn't?

[John Holmberg]

Who wouldn't? Why wouldn't we cater to the family?

[Brady]

Ted, we're out of kids menus.

[John Holmberg]

You want a little grilled cheese with your beer? A little baby slider? He's adorable. How old is. Once he gets his teeth come in, he's going to be adorable.

[Brett Vesely]

Mac and cheese over there.

[John Holmberg]

Come on.

Put a nipple on that. He's having trouble with the big, heavy glass. Good on you, Tempe Tavern. Good on you. I'm proud of them. They get it together.

By the way, John, the thing you were looking for. The ski and shot contest in the Olympics is called the Trans Masculine Non binary athletes. Oh, okay. That's what it is. I saw the shooter. That archer's trans masculine. That's fo joke. Oh, Joe. Yeah. So if we all should go to Tempe Tavern before they close and have a Pinterest.

[Brady]

Let's go.

[John Holmberg]

For the kids. We should have. You know what we should do? We should have like a charity drive over there for like toys for tots or something and then just give them to the people as they leave. Here you go. This is for you. What? Man, Go ahead, tot, take it.

Bring your kids. Another story I saw on the news last night that made me laugh was there's a lady who was in jail for eight years and her son, who's 29, is now in jail because, you know, apple tree situation there. But they're taking. Or they just announced that they're gonna not allow any more physical letters to be delivered to the inmates because too many times there's like something in there, there's drugs or something stupid. So now everything's a tablet. And so the lady's like, she said some really dumb stuff like only a formerly incarcerated person could say. She said her name's Veronica, she did seven years in prison and her 29 year old son is now incarcerated. Says that handwritten letters are a very important part of the times. As she said to me, it's like holding the hand of a family member. Their hand was on that paper and the love that they put into it and the thought and the time and the money they paid for the parcel and stuff. I felt like they're cutting off a line of communication between my son and I and I just yelled back at the TV and I'm like, nobody did that but you. You cut off communication between your son and I whenever he committed the crime or whenever you. You went to jail and then suddenly you started to lose.

[Brady]

You don't.

[John Holmberg]

You're not owed anything. But the new policy says that all personal mail from family and friends will be sent to processing centers. They'll scan it and upload it onto a screen. That way they know if you sent over a knife or drugs or anything like that. Cuz they just had a big problem, a big drug delivery and somebody had all over the paper. The officials are basically saying this, you know, for safety sake. And she's like, we shouldn't be punished for a few bad apples. Like you're all bad apples. You're in jail. It was one of the dumbest interviews I've ever seen. Like, who's your PR? The Tempe Tavern.

It starts December 15th. She said other family members worry the policy will remove a personal touch of handwritten correspondence. She said, I want my son to have, you know, my letters, my words. Not just some scan or tablet for those bad seeds that are out in jail with him.

[Brady]

He didn't do it.

[John Holmberg]

He's a bad seed. Sorry to break it to you there, Veronica.

[Brady]

He's not. He was in there. No, he made a mistake. They got the wrong guy.

[John Holmberg]

I know for sure he's a bad seed. His mother was in jail for seven years, too. The whole family's in on it. Might be a nice guy. Doesn't mean he's a bad guy. Like, it's like, you're charming, but you're still in jail because you did something dumb.

Especially, you know, if you're getting letters in jail, that means you're going to be there for a while. And if your mom's on TV saying, we got to get him these letters, that means you're going to be there for a really long time. So I don't know what your son did. And, he's 29. He didn't want to open a letter and read your handwriting. He was raised on tablets.

[Brady]

Just drone a couple of packages.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's the new thing. They just drone steak and lobster over to some guys and some drugs. Yep. Get creative. Prisoners for years have been smart about how they get things into the other guys. So, you know, if they're. Can basically cut off any tangible something. Yeah, do that.

Yeah. It doesn't. It doesn't bother me at all. Especially when they say stupid things like, you know, it's very important that we have the tangible thing that I touched and gave to him. It's like. And they're taking that away from us. Yeah, they took him away. Remember when he was in trial and they said, guilty, he lost everything. So you can't just give him letters anymore. Probably. She wanted to give her son some drugs.

I have a friend who is a former police officer whose solution for the drug problem is fairly drastic.

He wants to put fentanyl in all of it and then make it legal. He calls it his fentanyl nuke. Anybody who wants to take it, we let them all know. Probably fentanyl and everything now. And if they take it and they die. So. Well, I'm like, it's a solution, a final one.

But he's not wrong. Be terrible, but it would keep. All of a sudden, there's a mass drop from. Wow. All drugs kill. No more reefer. Madness fears. No more of those billboards of crystal meth making your teeth fall out in the first day. It's like, no, it just kills you the first day, the second you do it. So good luck. If you want to get high in your peer pressure. Suddenly, I think you would see a lot of people going, I don't think I'm going to try that.

And he's just a cynical. When you're friends with cops, you realize you don't have a dark sense of humor. You don't know what a dark sense of humor is until you hang out with a police officer for, I don't know, couple hours, because they've seen everything awful. They've been around just about everything you can imagine, and they're tired of it. Everybody's sick of their job a little bit. Now. Imagine your job is constantly dealing with the worst human beings on the planet. Eventually you're like, we could do without him. And he's not wrong. Now, first things first. We start with no letters, and then we move on to getting rid of them. But I did like the ingenuity of the drone. What was that in Kentucky? I don't remember. It was. They droned over lobster steak and drugs for a couple inmates. And I don't know how the inmate knew that that was just for him. And how the other inmates cooperated with that. Yeah, I would.

[Brady]

He had to have some pole.

[John Holmberg]

I mean, basically, they got the idea from the Red Cross because that's how we give food to the poor Africans, that we won't land on the. Because we'll get beat up by warlords. We just let them. But the warlords always kill the people we're trying to help and then take the supplies. We dump giant bags of rice down on port. Just take the supplies and we just fly over. Like, we're not landing. It's crazy down there. And they just throw food at them. And then hopefully the right people get it. But every time they get it, that big plane going over, the warlords are like, oh, cool, there's some rice coming in. We'll get that later.

[Brady]

That wasn't bad. They liked the old way because they'd get a truck out of it, too.

Get out of the truck.

[John Holmberg]

And the Red Cross, like, we're losing too many trucks. We like it just over the announcement of the intercom. We like you down there, but we're not landing. It's crazy in Africa. Have you seen it?

[Brett Vesely]

Good luck.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

Get a catcher's mitt.

[John Holmberg]

And they're just down there. Just Like, I got it. I got the plane. Three flies up with bags of rice, and then some guy comes through Derac his mind now. And then he takes it home to the fat people of Africa. Oh, that's a great band name. The Fats of Africa. Fat Africa would be great if it just said, hey, hey, hey, it's fat Africa. Oh, I want that to be on a poster. Anyway, that's why I wanted to start that African restaurant years ago where they. We didn't have drones when I came up with this idea. But instead, they just throw the food. The food drops down from the ceiling onto your. Onto your table. And you got to hurry up and eat it before busboy warlord comes and clears the table for his family. So you're in there. I never understood the express eating. They had that place in Tempe, the Ethiopian restaurant. And I'm like, all I know of Ethiopia is they're always hungry. How do they have a restaurant? And then to do it off the off. And it said on the authentic Ethiopian. I'm like, if that's true, that food falls from the sky. Authentic Ethiopian. Does it come with flies on my face?

Would you like a side of flies? I think you're saying that wrong. I am not. You will watch this. They're everywhere. Would you like a horse tail? What's that for? Sweating with the flies. Okay. This is authentic. And some white woman from 70s Hollywood comes and cries at your table for the bill. We just need 32.

[Brett Vesely]

50 comes out of the kitchen.

[John Holmberg]

Yep. Just please pay the bill. Jesus Christ. What's going on?

[Brady]

Yes, I'm picking up a couple other tables too.

[John Holmberg]

My dad's friend had a guy five serves. My dad's friend? Yeah, it was his friend. He worked with his son worked at a African restaurant. And I'm like, how weird was that? Heaven. Kenny, the white kid from a Clinton wandering in and out of an Ethiopian place. Hi, my name's Kenny, here to help you. Hello. If that's what you want. I don't know how to say it. That good.

[Brady]

How's your goat?

[John Holmberg]

It's pretty good today.

The guys in the back are clicking like crazy. Must be good. Anyway, two of our chefs died of malnutrition last night, so they're gonna make it. We do have a special on flies. Crazy easy. Let's get a wake up song, shall we? A good one to start off this day. 5, 8, 5 9, 800 and we'll scream it together. It's 98 KUPD. Wake up.

[Brady]

Is that weird? It's pretty Cool.

[John Holmberg]

Actually, no membership fee. I have heard enough of this.

Holmberg's morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.

There you go. Thank you. Miles to nowhere. That's another couple days of them. A week and a day of Miles to Nowhere kicking off our show. And then we find out what the. The new song's gonna sound like. The Thomas James Band. The guy sent me the song already. I haven't listened to it. I told him, I said, I'm not gonna listen until we go on the air January 5th with the brand new theme song. And I'll listen like everybody else for the very first time. Get that together. I fear that I'm getting sick. I have the beginnings of something.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, we did get that email. Now, if you're sick, you need to go home.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I'm starting to think maybe Susie said makes me nervous about the Friday Night After Dark thing. That's it. Makes me a little bit. Don't start this. So I'm heavied up on vitamin C and Diamatap for children and. Because I just like the way that tastes.

[Brett Vesely]

Just take your Flintstone vitamins.

[John Holmberg]

I love those. Have you had those as an adult?

[Brett Vesely]

Not lately, no.

[John Holmberg]

They're better as an adult, really, than they are as a kid. When you're a kid, it's like candy. But you only get one as an adult. Nobody's stopping. You can eat the whole bottle. I keep them in there like, you know, certs. Like, I just have a. I shake it around like Tic Tacs. They're phenomenal. Go get yourself some today.

[Brett Vesely]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

You can't hurt yourself on Flintstones children's vitamins. You can. Oh, you can't overdose. Your pee turns really yellow. I ate a whole bottle of them. I'm like, I can't have these because I took one. And I'm like, they're phenomenal. Flintstones vitamins are so good. That's my vitamin. That's how I get vitamins. I don't take supplements, but if you get me a bottle of Flintstones chewables, game on. Gone. And, you know, pouring it in my mouth.

Like five Betty's in a Barney at once and just crunch and the flavor mixes.

[Brady]

That's your. That's your combo.

[John Holmberg]

Well, whatever goes in. I just. I just assumed there was some.

[Brady]

Maybe you line them up.

[John Holmberg]

No, you know what? I might. Next time, I might put them all in the row. Here's all my Freds and Wilma's. I think there's a dino in their oldino. Just looks like a blob with a cutout on it. Seriously, we should send Thriller on a Flintstones vitamin run and just chug vitamins.

[Brett Vesely]

They may be here by Friday.

[John Holmberg]

That's true.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

But I've got the start of something. I've got that tender, weird don't touch my head thing. And my throat and ear connected somehow, doing a weird achy pain. And I'm like, no, not now, but unless I've got the covets, we'll do it. Homework After Dark is Friday and it's going to be a good party. We're going to have a little pre party there. Get down to stand up live beforehand. The show's going to start at 9:45. Of course, it's First Avenue in Jefferson. We got to say thanks to our friends Lerner and Row and Happy Endings euthanasia. My friend Dr. Mike. Dr. Mike Fixler and his whole team at Happy Endings Euthanasia. I remember they got on my radar 15, 16 years ago when I saw their truck driving on the road and it said, happy Endings Euthanasia. And I started laughing like, you get a hand job and put your dog down. And we called him, and I said, what were you thinking with the name? And he explained it beautifully. Like, look, it's a tough time when you're not going through it. You look at the car and you're like, I'll never forget that. It's great marketing. And by the way, I've used them. Unfortunately, I've gotten to know Dr. Mike through his service, and they have got a service that they've put together that is the only way to go through that. They're so amazing, compassionate, wonderful people.

[Brett Vesely]

We're using them tonight.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no. Yeah. Sorry, Brett. Yeah, I didn't know that. No, it's, you know, well, to take the worst possible thing you can have with a pet and have this gift of these people that come to your house and make sure that everything's done in the comfort of a home. Oh.

You'Re having a. What a go. Jesus Christ. 2026. Come on.

Yeah. First half of 2025, not so bad. But Jesus.

People in war have gotten knocks on the door less than you. Like, we lost another one. Sorry to hear that. But, yeah, you know what? You're in great hands because Dr. Fixler and Happy Endings is just. I can't rave about that enough. What a strange thing to be awesome. But it really is. And it's been. Once you discover it, you're like, oh, this is this is part of my world forever. Because unfortunately, our pets, the family members, you're going to come to that time of their lives most of the time. And to have that in your corner, I'm highly recommend putting that in your. That in your pocket.

Oh, I didn't know this. It says, careful with those Flintstones vitamins, John. I heard the Carteller lacing them with Neanderthal. I don't know if that's a real pillar. Fentanyl, Neanderthal.

I keep my eyes. But yeah, they're delicious, by the way. So hopefully we can get through with my vitamin, my Flintstones vitamin overdoses and all the stuff. I'm taking Dimetap for children. I take children's medicine because you can't screw that up. And I can take tons of it. And then I'll just see if I can clear this out. So as of now, we're all good for Friday. But I don't like this feeling. My body's basically knocking on six doors. You know, you just know. It's like, what's going on with this throat and ear thing?

Never keeps up.

[Brady]

Break time.

[John Holmberg]

It does. It knows when I'm about to relax and it shuts me down. It's a little early. Just get me through Friday and I'll. I'll call in sick for three days next week. We'll start the break early. We'll work it that way, but it's not easy. Also, it's better than being Tim Waltz, which he had to go on TV yesterday and say, please stop driving past my house and calling me a.

I had to let that one go. Tim.

If people are driving past your house calling you a retard, the last thing need to do to stop that is go on TV and say, please stop calling me a. Guess what's going to happen. Yeah, everybody's going to start calling you a. And the comments on Reddit about that are hysterical, which are basically like, can't take the heat. Like, no, that's not. Don't. He's not in the kitchen of being called a retard. No one is. But they were like, yeah, this guy can't take the heat. Then what's he doing in politics? I'm like, he didn't sign up for that. That's just. Just. You're being dicks. I think it's hilarious, but you're being dicks. So please stop doing that. And don't drive by the guy's house. If you see him out in person, that's good. Call him a retard. There. But you can't go calling people a retard at their house if they're just outside, you know, being people. He's retard. We get it. You think he's a retard, but that's because Trump called him that on Thanksgiving Day.

But, yeah, it's. If you have to ask that.

Probably just keep that under wraps. You know, don't go to the news. Don't stand behind a podium and go. Just. Absolutely sick of people driving by a house calling me a retard. Like, oh, boy, start the car. Even I don't want to do it. But now I do. Like, if Brady went on. Said just enough of people driving past my house saying, retard, Brett, we're going over to Brady. Oh, absolutely. Hey, I gotta see this, B. I want to be part of it. And then we'd sit there.

[Brady]

There's a big speaker on the roof of Brett's car.

[John Holmberg]

Brett and I would set up a vehicle with an intercom, and we would wait. And after the third or fourth car that went by, they just went.

Like, okay, we can go. He won't even know it's us. You can't be the only one, but you can be the fourth one.

[Brady]

Oh, broke a window.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I would stop calling me that. Enough Free Todd.

I would sit in my front yard laughing hysterically. If you. If I lived across the street from you and people drove by and just called you a. And then I'm. And then, God forbid, later that night, I'm like, what a great day of sitting there watching Brady get called the hundred times what's on tv. And you're like, arizona's family tonight with Yeti Gibson and the other guy, the gay one.

Tonight in Gilbert, a man is tired of it, and he's saying, so, all right, that's enough. Driving by my house, 1873 Elm Lane in Gilbert, Arizona, calling me a retard. Knock it off. Like, oh, I'd be in hysterics. I watched that happen all day. And he just invited the rest of the city to do it. What a moron.

You know, the only person that would say, please stop calling me a retard at my house is a retard. I'm going over there to do that. You proved it. But, yeah, I was reading the comments, and the left people were very distraught about it. These idiots on the right, they can't understand. No one ever said they ever had class and this and that. Then. Then the next dude, hey, can't. Can't handle the Heat. Get out of the kitchen. It's like, he wasn't in the kitchen. That's a bad response. Like, well, maybe we shouldn't call him a retard then. How about pussy? Yeah, you can do that. As you try whatever you want to do to yell at this guy's.

But he's listening, and that's a win for the crazy people. And I find it hysterical. But if you are doing that, you could class it up. It's kind of like the lady yesterday from Cinnabon. There's a better way to call people names, and usually it's through an anonymous letter. That's how I discovered that if you're gonna. If you're gonna do a racial slur thing, why are you signing it? And when somebody breaks out a camera, cut. Cut your character and just go. Thank you for coming to Cinnabon. Just be nice. When the camera's on. Once you see them, go, okay, and put the camera down. Then hit him with the.

[Brady]

Suck it. Suck it.

[John Holmberg]

Give them a couple of those off camera.

But once that camera's up, you can't possibly, like, still have the balls to keep going.

[Brady]

And how many times have we seen that? Are you recording this? Fine. Okay.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you record me. All right, Watch this. Then. Their anger gets the best of them. They're not smart.

[Brady]

Waste management open. Yeah, at the bar.

[John Holmberg]

What was his name? Oh, I can't remember. His name was great, too. Yeah, man. I had it down here the other day. Oh, what was his name? It was so good.

Oh, man, I wanted his name. Yeah, the kid for center, man. He. Yeah, he knew. He said, I know you're recording me. And he just told a bunch of Mexican peoples they're the worst. The worst human beings alive. What the hell was his name?

[Brady]

The bartender?

[John Holmberg]

He had such a great name. Brandt, Bert.

Berndelli or whatever. It doesn't even matter. After that, you're brand. The best part about that guy is you don't need his full name because there's only one Brent Burt in the world. And if you know a Brent Bert, he was the racist at the Phoenix Open. That's him, period. End of story. There's no, like, hey, hey, Brent Burt, was that you? No, it's a different Brent Burt. It was. You're the only Brent Burt in the town. Town of 5 million. Find me two Brent Berts. Go.

There's not.

It's pretty awesome. So I'm very excited about cameras getting people, but until Tim Waltz has a camera in front of his house where cars are streaming by like a parade of retard. In my mind, it hasn't happened yet. But Tim Waltz, see, nobody knew this was happening until Tim Waltz said, there's people driving by Colin Maritard. And that, to me, is an organized effort. The people driving by are probably the same seven or eight people, because who else?

[Brady]

It happened twice.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, but wouldn't it be coincidental if it happened even twice if those people didn't know each other? You know, it'll be fun. And I drive by Walter's house called Marita. It would be fun. And then you find out you're one of like five years. There's a line like, they're Christmas lights. Or you're everybody calling them a retard. Look at this.

[Brady]

Or they're like, finally, we've been doing it for two years.

[John Holmberg]

We've been doing it. Yeah. Why haven't we gotten any news? A guy drive by Tim Walter's house every night and call him a retard. It's great. I want to do that. And like, 20 other guys do it. Next thing you know, Walt is like, that's enough. Stop calling me a reach. I'm going on the news.

Would very much like it if you people would stop calling me a retard. What? What's going on? Oh, they drive by every night, 20, 30 of them call me retard. I'm doing that.

[Brady]

The lights on the roof say that.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. It rearranges Christmas lights. Retard. With an arrow to the door. It's not nice.

However, it is hilarious. And two things can be true at once.

I like the. And hopefully it is, like, real. But it's. The story is. Is not good.

But he's got that kid that's like, neurodivergent. So it's probably.

I hope that's real. But he goes into it, people would have to stop. And the cops out front. This is a good email I got, and I really got excited reading it because it's. I started littering. I did it this morning. It was great. I started littering a lot. As a point. I'm kind of. I'm trying to be the anti environmentalist to prove that environmental causes are money, business scams rather than anything else. I did some research. The United states is exactly 3.8 or 3.9, we'll say 4% of the world's population. So even if everyone in the United States was 100% compliant on the environment, 96% of the world is not, for the most part. You got some Europeans that are pretty uppity about that. But for the Most, let's say 88%. So that's the exact same thing as Los Angeles.

[Brady]

How much would our 4% do?

[John Holmberg]

Right. Los Angeles proper is about 12, 13 million. You get 20 million and go outside of it. Los Angeles proper is about 12 or 13 million. If only. And only Los Angeles complied completely to environmental causes and the rest of the United States didn't care. Would that make a dent in anything? Or would it just make a lot of money for people in Los Angeles who are in on that business? And that's essentially what it was. So until something changes. Well, because I'm. I still feel like I was the one who blew the lid off the local recycling scam. It's a complete scam. It's a jobs program. And I'm fine just call it what it is. But nobody is. When you read the rules of how to recycle, you're not. You're doing it wrong. Pizza boxes with pizza in it or out. Capped bottles are out. There's nobody who's a gatekeeper at the landfill or at the recycling center.

[Brady]

Envelopes.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

Yeah. So. And some. Some paper is, some paper isn't, some is right, some is wrong. Some water bottles are, and some aren't exactly tap off.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, we.

[John Holmberg]

And we throw this stuff away, thinking we're doing our part, but really what we were doing was keeping a program alive and money, tax money to go to it. And I'm like, that's wrong. If we're serious about it, let's be serious about it. And since I've been a kid, the ozone hole was going to kill us all. And it shrunk down and there. And the. And this is what caused all this, is that the environmentalists actually won that battle by saying there were chlorocarbons that were in aerosol cans and refrigerants that were causing this business. And so they got rid of those and they noticed that it was kind of fixing it. The one caveat to that was, as America or as humans patted themselves in the back, was we didn't have any volcanoes of any note for 15 years, 20 years. They do more damage than any freeway in America could possibly do. Just going off once and they. They'd blow holes. So for 15 years, it also helped that there were no volcanoes. The one went off up there in Norway or wherever the hell that thing was a few years ago, and it started eating holes in the thing again. It's like, okay, so this is just gonna be a constant. Are we dirty yes. Are we cleaning it right? No, it's a business. So I got upset the other day when I saw the video of India and how they handle their trash, which is just to take the Glad bag and dump it out into the river. And they've redirected canals. They have garbage canals where the water flows through to push it down. It's actually kind of smart. It stinks because it's India, but they just pour all their trash in there. It goes down. I'm like, well, so me having that auto start stop on my red lights is not going to help the environment.

I don't buy into that. I'm just a small cog. I'm doing my part. No, I'm not. I'm not. Because if it did, I turn it off. I'm frustrated by that thing. And if I really cared about the environment, I wouldn't have a car if I was.

[Brady]

Really.

[John Holmberg]

True. But that's not realistic. All right, well then until it is, let's just live like this. This lady and I got mad the other day about this. She mentions this too. It says, I know you were just joking, John. And I get the show because I am a fan and I usually don't get upset at stuff you say. But the other day when you said you're gonna start littering all the time. I know you get away with saying things like that cause you can hide behind being funny. And again, I do think you're very funny. But why have you been so mad at people who are eco friendly? It's weird. Were you touched by a green thumb? It's actually a pretty good line.

[Brady]

Good point.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. A few days before you said you couldn't be friends with anyone who's an environmentally motivated person because they're always ma. Because you read a story about how everyone was mad at. She miswrote this and it makes it even better. Was mad at Michael Jackson's yacht. Ms. Jordan's yacht. Michael Jackson's yacht would have been a scary like Disney cruise. It says he's a huge example and could be a better example to the millions of middle aged men who worship him. He can be a better steward for the planet and so can his fans. I love you, but please don't litter and wreck our planet. And we're still. Don't encourage your listeners who could end up being more of a cult than you know, to do the same. I will still listen because I'm not the type to be butthurt and I would love to hear why you're so mad at the environment. Kelly, I still love you. Please don't torch me. I'm not Kelly, but I'm not mad at the environment. I'm mad at the people saying that we're doing something for it. If you really want it's our fault. Yeah. If you really want this to end, stop driving, turn off your air conditioner, don't have fire, don't use gas products, don't wear shoes with rubber on them because they have to be manufactured through oil and all this other stuff. There's so many things you would have to do to be truly environmental rather than what you've been indoctrinated into believing, which is, hey, if you do it our way, we can make this better. When I was a kid, we didn't have plastic bottles at all. And now I'm watching at all get.

[Brady]

Paid to turn in the glass bottles too.

[John Holmberg]

At one time all we had aluminum cans. And then big giant 2 liter Pepsi started to show up. Remember those?

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They're like, well, these are awesome. And they were huge plastic. And when I was a kid, they always talked about how they're going to wreck the environment. We can't have these plastic bottles. This is bad. And what happened from there? We're lousy with plastic. I have never seen plastic bottles like this in my life. And and exact same time we have an island of plastic garbage floating in the Pacific that's as big as Australia. And they keep pumping out more plastic and tell us that the water's polluted so you can't drink that. You can't have city water. That's gross. Buy this water and put it in plastic. If we were serious about it, there'd be no more plastic. But we're not and we never will be. It's a money game. So I'm going to start a new jobs program where the city can take our taxes to clean up all the trash. I shoot up my car window. I think it's brilliant. Jobs creating programs. Program. Brett, gotta take the Diet Coke can now it's Waterloo. Big on the Waterloo Crunch. And people go, you noticed all this litter? And we'll have a crying Indian on TV telling us to knock it off and we won't. I'm gonna litter now. I'm gonna litter as a point to say in my lifetime. We have focused more and more and more on recycling and we have focused more and more and more on environment stuff. And it's not getting better because we are more plastic than I've ever seen in my life. I have three cases of water in a house with running water. I don't get it. And I fell for it too. I don't drink out of the tap anymore. I. I will. But most of the time, if there's a bottle of water there, I'll get that. And why? It's more convenient. I don't have to wash a glass. I can crack this open. It's already pre poured. I'm ready to go.

[Brady]

That tap is just for washing the hands.

[John Holmberg]

And occasional cooking. Yes. Sometimes you got to boil that out because it's not Indian water. I stick my head under there and sip water all the time. There's nothing wrong with it, but it's convenience. That's all we're into. And again, 4% of the population is the United States and we're being force fed this lie that I would absolutely love for us to be cleaner as a people. But until India stops pouring trash into the sewers that aren't sewers, they're just their rivers. And to the tune of a billion people, nothing's gonna change. Nothing at all.

[Brady]

China, India, they're the worst.

[John Holmberg]

And then you find out that the big wins in environmentalist stuff isn't us. We haven't made a dent. It's when industries stop choking crap into the air. You know who the biggest problems are? Are plastic manufacturers. Car batteries are massive problem.

[Brett Vesely]

Tesla batteries, too.

[John Holmberg]

Tesla batteries are a huge mess to try to A, create and B dispose.

So I'm going to start throwing cans on the road. I'm doing my part.

Now. Now she says, why don't I do it her way? I ask the same question in return. Why don't you do it mine? Your way's wrong. Is it? And your way is right?

Not so sure. I think you've just been taught that your way is right there. This guy said it right. Eco terrorism.

Eco terrorists. And I'm not even going to call out hypocrisy like he did. He said, what about Leo DiCaprio? Flies his private jet and has a massive yacht. And then the douchebag preaches to us about pollution, he's probably getting a cut. And if you know what, I've said this before, I'll say it again. If the environmentalists want to start paying me to spout their message, guess what I'm going to start doing? If it gets me a private plane and a yacht and all I have to do is yell at Brady about how he's not doing enough, I'll give a hoot. Consider that done. I am Woodsy the owl.

I am all over it. But, Kelly, don't yell at me. How about the lie? This guy said, shove it, Kelly. I just ate him at griddle and threw that greasy paper out the window out of spite. All right, Alexander, everybody, right now, whatever trash is in your car, chuck it out the window.

They say things that are horrible.

Updated Holmberg's morning sickness.

Unless it's glass, don't do glass. That's bad for tires. But aluminum cans, wrappers, that thing that's been down there for a month, you're like, I got to throw that out. Get it out of there. Water bottles, everything must go.

[Brady]

They've never stopped on cigarette butt.

[John Holmberg]

Cigarettes keep flying out. Cars. Get rid of them all.

Until they come back and go, all right, all right, all right. You're onto us. What do you want to do about it? It's like, stop making plastic bottles. Get this blue bin out of my house. None of it counts. I went through my recycling bin the other day because all these boxes, and I just was looking, and I'm like, this box isn't even recyclable. It says on the side that it's manufactured as stuff you can't recycle. It looked like a cardboard box, felt like a cardboard box, but it wasn't. And it had some weird packing thing, and it said, don't do this. This is not recyclable. I'm like, is there a gatekeeper at the recycling center? Through the blue bin that's sifting through like Lucy and Ethel for the chocolate factory. We can't do any of this. This is all garbage. And I've said it a million times. If I saw a video of the three or four thousand people it would take at the recycling center to make sure everything we're doing is okay while they just keep dumping that truck on them day after day. In a city of 5 million people, the blue bin drop off. You would have to have so many people sifting through to make sure that everything going into the recycling thing is recyclable. When I bitched about this 10 years ago, surprise. The city of surprise said, he's right. If you want to recycle, you got to bring it down here yourselves. We're. We're going to cancel the whole program. And they did. And tip of the cap to surprise. It's a surprise scam. It's a complete scam. David Vasquez, well, he's one of them, but plenty of them.

Yeah. This one says, have you ever seen what they have to do to those giant windmill blades? They can't be refurbished or recycled, so they just bury them. I didn't know that. I don't know when I remember what.

[Brady]

When Billy Bob went off on him.

[John Holmberg]

In Landman on the windmills. Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

How much it cost. I'm gonna. Great speech to produce it.

[John Holmberg]

Great speech. And yeah, oil builds it. It's a great speech. I didn't know what. What. What me. What is a windmill? Blade that's gone south.

They wear out.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah. I think when they stop working over there in Palm Springs.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no, no. The blade, though. Yeah, the blade.

[Brett Vesely]

So many. So many years, really.

[Brady]

Weather and weather. That's like.

[John Holmberg]

They just stop being blades.

[Brady]

Got to be replaced.

[John Holmberg]

Doesn't seem like a. Like a building.

[Brady]

Doesn't think about the plastic or let alone a car out here. You let it sit out in the sun for.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but it doesn't stop being shaped like a car. It's all a blade needs is this. No, but.

[Brady]

But the fenders will. You know those fiberglass or the.

[John Holmberg]

This isn't fiberglass. They're like made of steel.

[Brett Vesely]

Weaken being in the weather and stuff.

[John Holmberg]

Like that building doesn't.

[Brett Vesely]

We don't have covered by stuff though, too.

[John Holmberg]

I guess that seems like a scam too.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, I agree 100%.

[John Holmberg]

That's what it says. Throw trash on the freeway. Gives baby daddy serving time a job. Pick it up. I'm with you. Chuck out the McGriddle rappers today. CUPD backs the entire littering program. Hubbard radio wants you to litter and litter it all today. And not in the corners or hidden in some sort of strange thing right in the middle of the straight.

[Brady]

We're coming into the high season with presents and rapping and that's exactly right.

[John Holmberg]

When you're done with it, just put it in the road.

Wow.

No. Here's the common fate for blades. Due to the difficulty of cost of separating composite materials. They just. They just landfill them. I didn't know anything about that. Well, they just make them out of something better. It's a blade.

[Brady]

Too much money, bro.

[Brett Vesely]

It's probably not environmentally safe.

[John Holmberg]

Too much money. Money's the only thing here said, dude, I'm not kidding. I just driving up the i17 and I watched three or four cars just chuck something out the window. Well, damn it all, that's not enough.

The homework littering program for 2026 has begun. Early letter. I'm not talking about John's tearing up. It's great. I'm gonna. Maybe the Indian was standing next to that going, isn't this beautiful? We never asked Iron Eyes Cody if he was crying because he was sad. He might have liked that big heap of trash they love heap of stuff. Big heapo money. Hepa. I've seen it at the casinos. They call it Hippo coins.

[Brady]

He was crying out of guilt because he's like, I'm Italian.

[John Holmberg]

Why did they dress me like this?

[Brett Vesely]

I'm getting paid. That's fine, Whatever. Give me the headdress.

[John Holmberg]

And this one says, john, I actually love this. When I spot a plastic bottle on the road, it's a game to see if I can smush it. Yeah, do that. I think smushing it into the road is basically recycling.

I think at three in the morning, after the big litter campaign begins, I'm starting a jobs program. This is absolutely my point being. And the people who get mad are stupid. The point being is that the recycling thing is just a jobs program. So I'm creating a new one. We litter, right? And then every night at 3am the freeways close. No one will care. And then trucks go through and we've hired hundreds of people to drive trucks through and suck it all up into the right spots and then go take it to the dumpster. And we keep. And now the jobs program is. We've got a bunch of wallies out there that go up and scoop up our trash every day. It's a beautiful thing.

It's a beautiful thing.

[Brady]

As I look at a nice sized bag in our parking lot right now.

[John Holmberg]

Is there one blowing by? Gorgeous.

Some people have a deep, abiding respect for the natural beauty that was once this country. Iron Eyes Cody the Italian. Hey, how you doing? Some people don't. There's somebody I love throwing their trash out at an Indian pollution.

[Brady]

That's people. That was a racist hit.

[John Holmberg]

It was. Yeah. That wasn't a littering. That was like, there's a Indian coming out fully dressed through that bag of trash at the. I gotta be honest, knowing American history and just sitting on pins and needles, that they're eventually going to rise up again. If I was on the 202 and out from the bushes came a fully dressed chief like, oh, I'd throw something at him too. Like, we better let them know we mean business. They're coming back.

They want it back. Yeah, Chuck a piece of trash out today.

This one says, I understand your frustration with this, John, but you have to remember your origin point, which was that India was throwing all their trash into a river. Let's not turn everything into Apache Junction. Let's keep our things gathered and take it to the nearest river and throw it in. Jesse, that's a great idea. You know what? I might. Jesse, I might hire you as my. You know, I'm a little bit off the cuff. You are an organizer. You're my community organizer. You're the Barack Obama of the Homeberg litter campaign. Yes. We'll dump all our trash in Tempe Town Lake until it fills up. And they're like, why are you guys doing this? Like, we're tired of. We're tired of being lied to.

Stop pumping plastic into my life at every turn and telling me I need to recycle. Don't you see the game, the big circle that's involved here? You drink 12, 13 bottles of recyclable plastic stuff. You throw that away and then you get yelled at for, oh, we got a problem with plastic. The ocean is filling with plastic. There's that commercial that cartoon kid tells me, by 2055, there'll be more plastic in the ocean than water. No, there won't. That would be imp. Have you seen the ocean? Good luck with that kid. And it's your fault. What did I do wrong? I wasn't drinking out of plastic 25 years ago, and then it became my only option. Well, stop it. And then what? Suck puddles?

Stupid.

John, my 10 year old, agrees. And he just chucked his soda can out the window and said, eff it. You're raising a good boy.

Ah, the future. I've got them wrapped around my finger.

[Brett Vesely]

That's parenting.

[John Holmberg]

That's getting it done.

I have what I call litter Tourette syndrome. Boy, Kelly's letter. She didn't expect this, did she? Neither did I, to be honest with you. I want to throw. I want to litter all the time because I've been told for so many years how wrong it is. Brady and I did it on the golf course the other day last week at Camelback, right? Yeah. I took a can and I tried to do a hook shot over the top of the cart from inside the cart into the trash. And Brady, who's looking at me like, you're a jerk. I can't believe you're doing this littering campaign. It hit the ground and he kept driving. So he's with me.

[Brady]

It's in the circle.

[John Holmberg]

It's near circle. The can adjacent to the trash.

[Brett Vesely]

Horseshoes. I mean, what are you doing?

[John Holmberg]

At one point, it was touching the can.

[Brady]

If it's. If it's two feet away from the can.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. It made a ting noise.

[Brady]

He threw it away.

[John Holmberg]

I hit the Post. Yeah, silly.

Just silly.

[Brady]

Got to keep on pace too. I'm gonna hold the other golfers up.

[John Holmberg]

This one says John. As a garbage man for years, I do say that recycling is actually separated and sorted by hard working Mexicans who pick out the garbage and then automatically gets the metal, paper and plastic separated. The US sold recycled byproducts to China in 20, 19 and 20 and China started to refuse the world's trash dump and made recycling so much more expensive to process. Once the money wasn't there, small cities ended it. It's about money.

And I've never seen. I want a video of this insane conveyor belt of gatekeepers from when I throw it away to where it goes. Because I don't see it. I just don't see it. I don't see the thousands of people it would take to go through and find all those envelopes with windows in them and put them in the proper receptacle. I just don't see that happening.

[Brady]

Every once in a while I'll see people going and getting the aluminum cans out, sorting that.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you're talking about out of a trash can. Yeah, I'm talking about the facility.

[Brady]

Yeah, but I'm saying like the facilities there. I don't know what kind of dough you're getting for aluminum now, but they're.

[John Holmberg]

Talking about an individual.

[Brady]

You're better off getting a catalytic converter.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, for sure. Steal that. But you're talking about an individual digging through the garbage. I'm talking about some copper. Go to the recycling. I'm just from your neighborhood on recycling debt. Right? Think of this. All those are wrong. Somebody has to go through every blue bin in your neighborhood.

[Brady]

Yeah, we have two different trucks.

[John Holmberg]

It would be a 20 person job.

[Brady]

Just for your street.

[John Holmberg]

Now multiply that by every street in Phoenix. It's not happening.

[Brady]

And then the HOA goes by every once in a while, puts a little note in your trash can.

[John Holmberg]

You're recycling wrong. Yeah, and you know what I do? Next time I have my recycling bin out, I fill it with metal and I put a sign on it that says, you rat.

Fine me. I've got money. It's all $200. Good, it's worth it. It's a 200 fine to make you mad. I'd pay that every week.

[Brett Vesely]

Aren't they wasting paper too?

[John Holmberg]

Thank you, Brad. And gas. Probably driving around looking at people's garbage. By the way, if you're a person who goes through other people's recycling and leaves notes, I hope you get the worst case of New cancer that hasn't been invented yet. You piece of. I went through your garbage and I noticed you're doing it wrong. Let me go get my shotgun real quick. I'm gonna. I'm show you how something I'm real good at.

What kind of human being takes it upon themself to snoop around in your trash and then tell you. I told on you and you're getting fined for that? You know, I'd say, you know what? That's great, Gladys. You know what? I'd love to have a talk with you about that. Which house is your? And then she'd say, so. And every day that every Wednesday morning, that's recycling. I will drive down that road and smash her recycling bin and blow her garbage all over her front yard every day. That's my fine. And if it cost me 200 bucks a month or so from HOA, I'm getting my money's worth by mashing your recycling all over your front yard.

Stop looking at people's garbage.

Yeah, this one says.

Says I worked in public works for Gila River. Our community has recycle cans and refuse cans, green and blue. And some community members use the blue can. If they forget. And trash day natives don't care either. Yeah, the people that were crying in the commercial are like, I don't know, the truck's coming. Put out the blue can. The other one we forgot is for the.

They put it out there. You take. They got their spray paint in the blue can. Their cans getting bigger and bigger every week because they just spray painted the color and these. It needs to be black. We filled out the wrong one. Go get the spray paint and spray it black. And they will take it. Our nature.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, didn't you get in trouble for putting dog poop in there or something like that?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, some lady poked her head in them. Just wait until next week. I'm putting my human poop in there. I might start dumping in that. And you know what I've never heard? People are pooping. The recycling center sorters are very angry about it because there aren't any. It's not a thing.

This one has human in it. Who did that? Good luck finding it. I will poop in it. I will put metal and paint and everything else until I hear somebody say, you know the guys at the recycling center found out that you're doing that. Who are sorters? I don't believe you have those. I'd like to see some video of this. I've never met anybody who's like, knows somebody Who's a sorter? Oh, he's a recycling sorter out at the conveyor belt at the recycling center. Doesn't exist. It's not a thing.

[Brady]

But hang out at the Tempe Tavern all the time. The sorters.

[John Holmberg]

Everyone listening to us that drives past the Hubbard radio building on 52nd street on your way towards the 202, please. There's a bus going by right now. Please just throw something at the window.

[Brady]

Window.

[John Holmberg]

Just constantly litter. I want to see that this campaign is working.

[Brett Vesely]

Another email from Susie.

[John Holmberg]

I'll honk your horn.

[Brett Vesely]

Thanks.

[John Holmberg]

And actually drive through our parking lot and throw it in our parking lot. I'm fine with that.

[Brady]

We've got people.

[John Holmberg]

Will you please stop telling people?

Getting kind of thin.

I don't know if you've looked around. This building is a lot more building than it is people. And I think that's going to keep less trash. Yeah, yeah. Maybe that's what we're doing. But we got budget cuts. We got too much trash. Hey, there's a big trash truck. Tip it over. Do a wheelie.

[Brady]

He's opening up the back end.

[John Holmberg]

Missed the truck. Yeah. Those guys can't litter. That would be embarrassingly dangerous. Just a McGriddle package. Like, that guy had.

Nothing wrong with that.

So just wanted to throw my 2 cents in there. When was her name? Kelly. Kelly emailed me and yelled at me about being upset and the reason I don't want to be friends with people who are environmentalists. Because it's their way or the highway. If they say, you should do it my way, I'm like, you should do it mine. You're a jerk. We're saying the same thing. I didn't call you a jerk just because you think your way's right. I think your way is completely flawed. You can do it if you want, but I can too. And I just happen to have a legion of followers that will chuck their McGriddle packages out because I say so. And that's awesome.

I just need to see one guy go by, chuck some trash. I'm gonna keep my eyes on the road today. That's pretty much my goal. We need to have Thriller outside with the sign says throw trash at me.

You hit the gimp with a McGriddle package, and we'll give you tickets to a concert. Wow, that's pretty good.

[Brett Vesely]

Don't worry about tapping that aft.

[John Holmberg]

Just throw garbage. We'll take Corey's shirt off and left Thriller stand there with a target on his chest. And if you hit him with him. A griddle. Right Rapper. He gives you tickets to a show.

[Brady]

Put a light over his head when it hits.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you're going to the Smashing Pumpkins. Anyway. It isn't because I want the world to be dirtier. It's because the current system is so broken. We need to kind of Boston Tea Party this thing a little bit. Stop making plastic bottles. If they were serious about it, it, they'd be. It wouldn't be yelling at a DJ in Phoenix. You'd be yelling at Coca Cola over in Atlanta going, what's the deal? You're just churning out Arrowhead bottles and whatever Dasani. Whatever Coke makes. And like, there's hundreds of millions of bottled water bottles everywhere. Nobody bats an eye. I watch environmentalists drink out of it because they feel good that they recycle that bottle. But I don't see them at Coke going, we haven't made a new plastic bottle in 20 years. They're all old bottles. No, they're not made from recycled goods.

[Brady]

Maybe we've tried that paper straw thing.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they're still out there.

[Brett Vesely]

Those are terrible.

[John Holmberg]

Yep. When I was litter.

[Brett Vesely]

And get rid of those damn paper straws.

[Brady]

That's terrible.

[John Holmberg]

Before the crying Indian showed up, there wasn't an island of plastic in the ocean. And then once we got serious about littering and. And environmental stuff, we had an island of plastic that got worse than ever.

[Brady]

I mean, the. Yeah, the plastic to make just saved worse than ever. Saved big money on the huge convenience.

[John Holmberg]

There goes that trash truck.

[Brett Vesely]

Dominique wants to know what the address is. She's on her way to support this littering campaign.

[John Holmberg]

1100 North 52nd street here in beautiful Phoenix, Arizona. 85008. Put it in your nav system now and chuck some paper out in front of us. We're fine with that.

There's litter everywhere. Why did you do that? Call the news and then be Tim Waltz. Stop calling us retards and throwing trash at us.

Or how about this? Throw your trash out and go. KSLX is retards you.

They're not here. They taped their show. Anyway.

It'S 7:22. Let's get a Wake up song. What do you got there, Bert?

[Brett Vesely]

There's no recycling songs but Action Ride Shop. Bringing you guys the Wake up song. And you know the holidays are coming and it's now's the time to get yourself a deal on a brand new mountain bike. 20% off, all in stock mountain bikes. So if you've been trying to figure out what to get that somebody maybe Take off a few lbs. But Action Ride Shop is the place to be. Plus, don't forget, the weather is getting cold and it's time to head up north. And skis, snowboards, everything you're going to need for the cold is right there at action ride shop. Two locations right there at Gilbert Road and Southern, the OG and of course, Power Road.

[John Holmberg]

McDowell actionrideshop.com yeah, two people in a row. One is George Wilson. I don't think he's Native American, but two other ones that are from the Navajo res. And he goes, there's no one worse than us at throwing trash on the ground. The crying Indian was a lie.

I don't know. I've never been up on the res up and. Well, I have. I just never paid attention. I was going to the casino. I had my eyes on the prize.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, we've seen the shed after a Slayer concert. You know, it's bad out there.

[John Holmberg]

Shed. The shed. Shed, yeah, the shed. It sounds like said something else.

[Brett Vesely]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. No. Nobody goes to the trash cans at the Slayer concert. And you know what? There's people employed to clean that up.

[Brett Vesely]

They don't even put them out. There's no reason.

[John Holmberg]

If Slayer's there, it's like, what's the. They're just gonna use the trash can as a weapon?

[Brett Vesely]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Some of that thing's gonna turn into a bow and arrow and we're all doomed.

[Brett Vesely]

On the list, it's all about Tempe Tavern. So have a drink on me from AC DC Drink, drink. Drunk from Hell, yeah. Bottoms up for Nickelback Beer from Psycho Stick, Motorhead, Overkill, Van Halen, take your whiskey home. Metallica whiskey in a jar. Van Halen, Bottoms up. ZZ Top Beer drinkers and Hellraisers. Ozzy Demon alcohol. Sammy Hagar mas Tequila.

[John Holmberg]

Some good stuff. I will say for those who weren't paying attention earlier, the glorious Tempe Tavern, which deserves all the credit in the world. World fooled everyone with the greatest PR sentence of all time. After having over 500 underage kids cited at their bar and two raids, their quote. Once again, we at the Tempe Tavern take underage drinking seriously. Boy, do they. The best in the business.

And that's what they should have. Shirts that say Tempe Tavern. On the front. Front, we take underage drinking seriously. On the back, asu, you'll. Somebody's gonna make a fort. Brett, print them up. And each T shirt comes with an id because they're gonna. You're gonna. By my count, you need 431 of those from all the ones that you swiped last. Last two raids.

[Brady]

Serving miners since.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

I like that. There's actually a date. They're keeping track of Cuff. Serving miners since 1977. Tempe Tavern. Thirsty kids. It's the new Kool Aid, man. Always full of beer. It's a picture. Thirsty kids. Tempe Tavern.

[Brady]

Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God, the ad campaign. I'm Don Draper over here right now. Thirsty kids is gold.

Anyway, go litter at the Tempe Tavern. Let them know you care. That's what I. Yeah, go drop some trash off over there, too. I love have a drink on me, but we play that one. Which one do you like? Brett? Take your whiskey. Solid. To the Van Halen one.

[Brady]

Bottoms up. I haven't heard in a while.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, let's go. Ah, God, this is a good list. This is a good drinking night thing. You got Motorhead up there and even Mastaquila.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, that's Sammy, but still. It's a good song, too.

[John Holmberg]

Trip, text me. I think it was the Sunday night game or Monday night game. A couple weeks ago, they just played Motorhead as a commercial rejoiner. I'm like, what's the connection? It was a Detroit game. I said, is there something. Oh, it was Thanksgiving, I think.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, I did hear that, actually.

[John Holmberg]

Was Lemmy a big Detroit fan or did he drive a Ford or what?

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. Seeing if he heard it, because I did hear Seeger, and sure, it makes sense to get all the Detroit people out, but Lemmy.

All right, yeah, let's go with, we'll drink. Drink. Drunk's a solid one, too.

You know, just to piss everyone off. Nickelback, Bottoms up. Well, the kids like Nickelback. They're a younger band. Is there a Barney song about drinking?

I say, Tempe Tavern, this is the best advertising you've had in a hundred years. Wrap your arms around this and have, like, kids nights and all sorts of stuff. We'll do. Drink, Drink Drunk by Hell. Yeah. I'm just kidding about Nickelback. It's for you. Tempe Tavern. You, Taylor, take teen drinking very serious.

[Brady]

Hey, it's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually.

[John Holmberg]

No membership fees. I have heard enough of this.

Morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.

A lot of people like to whisper the word gay around Weezer, but I'm not one of them. I love that band. That's hash pipe right there. That's already 2025 years old, if you can believe it. And I'm struggling with that one right now. 25 years ago that came out. What?

Stop it. Yeah, Hash pipes. A great one. I'm enjoying all of you guys putting together your AI.

Videos and pictures of the way my planet would look. And guess what? It already looks like. That pretty much. It's pretty good. And then somebody put my head on a guy called Captain Planet. He made me a superhero. I like that one as well. Well, pretty good stuff. I'm making a point.

This guy said he works at the recycling center or at the trash thing. He said the recycling conveyor belt has an air compressor over that just blows the lighter stuff onto the ground and then they sweep that up and throw that away.

It's ridiculous. And you're also not supposed to bag. Another person said you're not supposed to put your recycling in bags. Right? Yeah, I don't see anybody like, undoing those bags, slowly going through and recycling for us. When people do make that mistake, it's just not happening.

Anyway, I go on and on. I like a world that's better. When we can just make fun of Pootie Tang, Lamar Jackson and crying Harbaughs.

And also that my second least favorite quarterback of all time, that pious piece of garbage, Philip Rivers, might start playing again. Yes, please. Bring him back to the fold. Nothing better than a 44 year old who thinks he's still got it going. I'll get off the couch and try some December football.

We're gonna watch an execution. We're gonna watch a live death on TV. And all of his 14 kids are gonna see it too. Fine. With that money. Oh, I hate that.

[Brady]

Grandkids.

[John Holmberg]

Well, Jesus, he has a billion kids. He made $120 million over his last four years. And he's like, I gotta get back in there. I wouldn't want to go home either. I think I'd put myself in harm's way. If I had 10 kids waiting for me at home, I'd stand out that football field till I was 60.

[Brady]

And they've had kids. I don't know how many grandkids he.

[John Holmberg]

Has, what he's got, but it's not. It's not a favorable place to go. Well, heading home. Heading home's more work. It's. There's less people in an NFL locker room than in his house.

Old man Philip Rivers. Oh, oh, oh. Let's do it. Dear Brady's Lord God, Jesus, Lord, please let the upper torso separation of Philip Rivers happen live on television in the next couple of weeks.

A high, low hit from. I don't know who. They claim the Texas. Oh, oh, you get the Texans in there. And Tenille Hunter goes low. Will Anderson goes high. And they high, low. Separate that old man from himself. Oh, Lord Jesus, can you see it? And because there are no mistakes. Lord Jesus, baby. Lord, you put that thought in my head. Let it be true, sir, please. Lord Jesus, baby. Pretty close enough.

[Brady]

Good prayer.

[John Holmberg]

Lamb of God, slaughter the infidels. Shrimp is bad there.

[Brady]

Shrimp is good.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's bad. God's original thought was he hates shrimp. And then he changed his mind. His son talked him into a liking shrimp, even though evidently they're the same guy.

[Brady]

He loved all creatures.

[John Holmberg]

Also, there's a thing in a Bible somebody showed me the other day that if you ever had a rash, you can't get in. That's an original thought. If you have a rash, you have a rash, you have a. You have eczema. You can't get into. You can't get into heaven. It's in the Old Testament. Testament. And people go, yeah, that's the old one.

[Brady]

Christ came back and changed it up.

[John Holmberg]

Christ, the same guy. Doesn't make any sense.

But, yeah, you can have rashes now and get in Toledo's. In Toledo's. At least the rash isn't keeping them out. It's a good one, too. It's like those with a rash and, oh, pus in your eye or something. Like, if you ever wake up with posi, you're out. And that was just a dude writing that day going that my kid's gross. He's got rashes and he's out.

I don't want that in heaven. If it was Louis CK a long time ago said, Imagine dying 10 or 12 years before your wife, and you just go to heaven and you're having the best time. Like, it's perfect. It's paradise and everything else. And then some guy taps you on your shoulder, goes, your wife's coming tomorrow. What? I'm still strapped to her. It's like, yeah. He said, till death do us part. We're apart now, right? And he goes, no, you got to spend eternity with her. Leave it to a woman to ruin heaven.

Come up and start spying on you up there, going through your heaven phone and wondering what you're thinking.

Yeesh. It's 7:51. It's time now for Brady to give you all the news that only Brady knows. We call this the Brady Report. It's brought to you by our [e-mail] 78 degrees today in this beautiful place. So you can sit, get a little shade so you're not, you know, squinting. Squinting causes wrinkles, and we're all getting to that age. We got to worry about that. So let's get some shade on that back patio. We're sitting outside sipping mimosas, watching TV on that glorious television you've got in your back patio as well. A lot of people have that going on, but the glare gets them All Pro Shade can fix that. Check it out. All pro shade.com get a motorized shade or one of those blinds right now and they'll throw in a heater for you so you can enjoy the nighttime temperatures when the shade is permanent. AllPro Shade.com is where you go. Brady reported.

[Brady]

Good Tuesday morning to you, Phoenix.

[John Holmberg]

Hello, world.

[Brady]

Happy National Christmas Card Day.

[John Holmberg]

Most of the day to get them out.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

It takes that long?

[Brady]

Yeah. You want to get on it.

[John Holmberg]

That's 13 days.

[Brady]

I just saw a thing about Christmas cards that said it's okay to be a couple days late, too.

[John Holmberg]

Let me tell you this. Don't send me one. I don't want them. They're clutter. You don't mean it. And I don't care what happened to your family this year. If. If you need to write me a letter at Christmas to tell me what happened to your family and it's all news to me. Me, we're not that good of friends. So if I have to catch up with you every. Oh, look, I haven't talked to this guy in a year. Daughters in like ninth grade. Haven't seen her since she was a baby. We're not that good of friends. I don't need it if you just have to kind of again, environmental limit it. And plus, if there's pictures of you, I put it in the fire later and send back when I burn up your family.

[Brady]

We just got the one family that's friends with Ronnie. She grew up with anyway. And you get the letter with it. The kids are amazing. They've.

[John Holmberg]

Of course they are.

[Brady]

Created a new planet.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my God.

[Brady]

That's trickle honor students.

[John Holmberg]

And then you write, I just want the one. My kid's still adult. Like, I can't figure out how to get this kid off the couch. Toledo's letter to people who haven't talked to him in a while. Brutal. Ah, the boy moved back and never paid rent in Tucson the whole year.

[Brady]

I've always thought about doing that. Sending out just.

The most depressing thing.

[John Holmberg]

But he can do it.

[Brady]

For real?

[John Holmberg]

You do it as a joke. Yeah. He wants to be a fashion designer, but I told him that's just a world of if you're not blowing dudes, you're not gonna make it in that industry.

[Brady]

Got a couple of basis fun facts. The Red Vineyard at Aries is the only Van Gogh painting that's known to have sold in his lifetime. It sold for 400 francs in 1890.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, one of his own paintings sold while he was Lassie. Okay.

[Brady]

Which is roughly the equivalent. About 2500 bucks today.

[John Holmberg]

And it's worth how much?

[Brady]

That. I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

20 million?

[Brady]

Yeah. It's got to be up there. In 1947, a woman went to Johns Hopkins to cure her hives. She received an experimental drug called compound 1694 for hay fever and allergies. Her hives cleared up, and she reported that, weirdly, she stopped getting nauseous while riding on a public transportation. Doctors immediately tested the drug for motion sickness, and compound 1694 became Dramamine. Dramamine.

[John Holmberg]

Nice. And it was for hay fever.

[Brady]

Yeah. And. Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Do scientists, allergies in medicine know anything they're going for?

[Brady]

They're practicing medicine.

[John Holmberg]

I know, but they always say the same thing. Viagra was for blood pressure. Like, look what it's doing to my lower blood pressure. But it doesn't. It can. It can, but it's like, you're all right. It doesn't do it enough to be a thing, but you swell up like nobody's business when you need to, and it's on demand. The amazing thing about Viagra is, well, except for when you're asleep, I like to take it before I go to bed and then wake up with one of those things. I haven't done it for a while, but it's awesome. And toying with yourself on Viagra is even better. It's expedited quicker. You don't have any pressure to see if it works, but it's just like your dick's on high alert. It's like Dick Con 5. Like, you take it just walking around going, are we ready? We ready? Calm down. We're good. I'll let you know now that you know. I'll let you know when I'm ready. Like you did the Viagra races at pir. It doesn't matter. You have to be stimulated.

I was enjoying it for a while. Like, every day. I was taking it, like. Like your blood pressure pills. I was taking it myself. I'm like, I wonder what happens if you keep going. And the tugging was ridiculous.

[Brady]

Thomas Jefferson and Aaron Burr tied in the 1800 presidential election. I left it up to the Congress to pick the president.

[John Holmberg]

It was crooked Brady. I know that election very well. I'm a historian and I know back then they were cheating, stuffing ballot boxes. It was really bad. The Dems, they were a problem. All those blacks were voting and I know they couldn't. Back in Atlanta, they just picked it. They just chose it. Like college, like in college.

[Brett Vesely]

Is it a bowl game or what?

[John Holmberg]

At a better schedule.

[Brady]

Panel got together. They like TJ better.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

Prisoners. He had that pregnant slave and they're like, he's got to raise the baby and got bills. Aaron had a lot of money from his family. It was different.

[Brady]

Prisoners in France do not wear uniforms and are instead able to buy normal clothes. The uniforms were abolished there in 1983. If they can't afford to buy them. Them buy their own clothes, they can request free clothing which is provided by charities. Huh.

It dressed pretty nice in prison.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, it's France.

[John Holmberg]

That's true. Their prisons are supposed to be like the worst in the. In the world.

[Brady]

Here's a couple prisons that happen.

[John Holmberg]

Just abusive, like put you in a rat infested cell. You got no rights. I don't know if they've cleaned that up, but the dude who they made the movie with Leo DiCaprio and Tom Hanks, Catch Me if youf Can. Yeah, that was a real guy, Frank. Yeah. He wrote a book, Abigail. Yeah, but he wrote a book about it. And two of the things they skipped was his time in Sweden and the French prison at the end of the movie that he's in where he's got all the long hair and stuff. He went there a couple of times and he's like, there is no place worse than a French prison. It's. They don't care about. Like, you don't have lawyers going and going, oh, they need sunlight and. And you are in there. They shove food at you and the rats get to it. You got to fight them for that. And he's like, it is. You are not. You're not going to commit many crimes in France if you've been in their prison once. That's how it should be here on.

[Brady]

This day in history. December 9th, 60 years ago, 1965, A Charlie Brown Christmas premiered on CBS, still going strong 46 years ago in 1979. On December 9th, smallpox was officially eradicated.

42 years ago, 1983, scarfaced open up in theaters.

[John Holmberg]

Probably the most overrated classic movie of all time. It's terrible Boring. It's not only boring, it's terrible. The acting's really bad, the casting's even worse, and the story is stupid.

[Brady]

It got better 37 years ago in 1988. Twins with Arnold Schwarzenegger.

[John Holmberg]

That's a fun one. At least that's a comedy. Scarface should have been 33 years ago was De Palma and Brian De Palma. Movies are bad. He's got two good ones. Scarface ain't one of them.

[Brady]

In 1992, on December 9th, Prince Charles and Princess Diana announced their separation.

[John Holmberg]

No. Whatever happened to her?

[Brady]

Well, car accident.

[John Holmberg]

I saw a thing online that said, recycle the car. What do you get a princess who has everything thing? And it set a seat belt in an airbag. Like, oh my God, are we there now? Are we doing that?

Terrible.

[Brady]

31 years ago on December 9th, in 1994, Bill Clinton fired surgeon general Jocelyn Elders after hearing how she told a conference that self pleasure should be discussed in school as part of human sexuality.

[John Holmberg]

That one of people to jerk off. And what we needed to teach the kids was girls. Get on your knees. Why am I beating off so much? Because the ladies aren't putting out. So Surgeon general my ass.

[Brady]

A poll on Christmas trees found that 14% of Americans will have at least two Christmas trees in their home this year.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's what I told you that. That when I told you the pod people of Gilbert were talking in front of me and one had seven. And when the other girl went into her house and saw seven, she told her husband, like, Kristen's got seven Christmas trees. She went and got six. So now her house is large. She goes just so warm and inviting. I'm like, you're pod people. Can't you see someone else's house and just leave it be? You have to do everything they do. Sure enough, Gilbert pod people at it again.

[Brady]

So when they say that, does that include like. It would be like if it was a two foot tree.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. It's too many trees.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

No, it's just imagine Santa coming and going, what the is this? I'm in a forest one at a time.

[Brady]

We have like three artificial, I think.

[John Holmberg]

Full size three trees.

[Brady]

No, one big one. And then this year, Ronnie's put up her aunt's tree that she had, which is about a five footer.

[John Holmberg]

That's two trees. That's a tree. Five foot is a big tree tree. So you got that. You got to decorate that.

[Brady]

All right. Yeah. Kirby did it.

[John Holmberg]

It's enough. One tree. Why not just add all of her ornaments to your tree. We did a little combo combine.

[Brady]

The latest tick tock trend. Food trend is Grinch spaghetti green. The kiddos love it. John, you dye the noodles green.

Or just use spinach?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, spinach noodles are good green. I like those.

Two trees. We have to do that every time somebody dies. You have to use their tree stillness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible.

Holmberg's morning sickness.

[Brady]

We got a. I guess 57 year old guy in Canada is facing charges. Got into a fight with his neighbor. I know two Canadians fighting. But the guy used a snowblower to assault the other person. Cranked up the snowblower and blew Canadian weapon. Blew some snow on him.

[John Holmberg]

We think, we think it's funny but it's a Canadian weapon. You wouldn't want that if somebody was doing that to you. Those snowblowers are strong.

Oh yeah. I'm gonna fight through the wind and get to.

[Brett Vesely]

You.

[John Holmberg]

Would see and that's why it's a Canadian fight. You know that's a weapon of war in Canada. And you'd go hit him with your shovel. The big lanky driveway one or hockey stick or whatever you've got handy.

[Brady]

That 88 year old guy in Michigan who's trying to retire. They did that crowdfund me form the GoFundMe. Some.

Positivity influencer posted about the guy because he, he retired from GM but he didn't get his pension because GM went bankrupt. Then his wife got sick and passed away. Wanted to, he had to go back to work. Tried to pay off over 200,000 medical debt. This positively positivity influencer got online. The dude's got $2 million.

[John Holmberg]

Nice. So you're telling me the lady that used the N word at Cinnabon covered half of his debt in the weekend for saying the N word. And this guy needed $200,000 in help and couldn't get it online. I know he got 2 million.

[Brady]

He went back to work to try to pay.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I'm saying. He didn't have like a weekend of 200 grand to fix this. But the N word girl did and knocked it out in three days.

[Brady]

Which is what now it's up to.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. But this dude had to go to work again. That's. That's America in a nutshell right now. Now the N word girl has like a couple hundred thousand bucks because she lost her job at Cinnabon. By the way. She'd had to work at Cinnabon for eight years to make $200,000.

They gave it to her in a weekend because she called the customer the N word and then said suck it, suck it. And lost her job. And they're saying we have to protect white people.

[Brady]

I think you saw listed some of the donors yesterday. Eight dollar donation from.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, there was Himler. Yeah, Heinrich Himmler kicked in some real people.

A lot of good. A lot of good. A lot of good people. Good people on both sides, Brady. No. You know what? I didn't see any Somalians donating, which makes her. Right, I think.

[Brady]

Got a 37 year old woman from Ocala, Florida. She got busted walking down the sidewalk drinking some cinnamon whiskey with no pants on.

[John Holmberg]

Cover the smell.

[Brett Vesely]

Fireball do it to you?

[Brady]

Yeah. The officer noted in the report almost underwear was around her knees, exposing her buttock in vagina area.

[John Holmberg]

No pictures. Oh, there's pictures. Oh, you know, not as bad as I was expecting. As bad as I thought. Still torn?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah. I mean, she's wrecked.

[Brady]

That's marriage material in Florida.

[John Holmberg]

You clean her up, you could fool some people. Put some pants on her.

[Brady]

You get her down in the villages?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, sure. Oh, in the villages. She's gonna make hay. That girl got no pants on. Smells like a churro.

She drinks cinnamon water, walks around with no pants.

Ever. Those people. I have a full keg of fireball my friend Tom Sizer brought over. It's got a tap. I don't even know what to do with this thing. Every time everybody's like, let's do it. We all do one. We're like, never again.

[Brady]

Never again.

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Brett Vesely]

People that love that love it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's really good. But you're good for one or two, tops. And then your whole day is just miserable and you're not even drunk. It's just the sugar.

It's like eating too many gobstoppers. It seems like a good idea to eat the third one.

Your teeth start hurting.

[Brady]

Then you, you. Is that the one you mix with the rum? Chada?

[John Holmberg]

No. If you're gay. Yeah. Or you just drink it like a man.

[Brady]

It's a. They call it the Captain Crunch or something.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, right.

[Brett Vesely]

You're talking.

[John Holmberg]

You're talking, Katie. KB is going to love that stuff.

[Brady]

Let's get some. Brady.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you and your. You and the sorority girls you're serving over at Tempe Tavern are going to love what you're making Captain Crunch at, Brady.

[Brady]

You got to be creative over there.

[John Holmberg]

At Tempe Tavern. No, they drink what you get. Scooby Snacks. Keep your mouth Closed off.

[Brett Vesely]

This radio thing don't work out for Brady. We know where he can get a job now.

[John Holmberg]

You didn't have rum chata at the house, do you?

Cuz if you do, you need to go wash off your genitals. They're covered in feces.

[Brady]

There might be run. I know there's stuff to make that espresso martinis run out.

[Brett Vesely]

Okay, no, that's not rumata.

[John Holmberg]

That's not rumata. No, no. Ramada is for sorority houses and homosexuals both. Fine. Just saying, if you've got it, you're one or the other. All right, here we go.

[Brady]

This is a tough one for me to watch.

[John Holmberg]

All right, it's a guy sleeping, I think. Yep, he's out cold in his front. Oh, that's the dude spitting another man's mouth. Oh, my Lord. Oh, sweet Jesus. God, he's spitting his friends wide open sky.

[Brett Vesely]

Wake up.

[John Holmberg]

No, he's so. He's so drunk that his friends can spit in his mouth.

[Brady]

I went back and forth on. Oh, those. Get me.

[John Holmberg]

We've seen a couple of those. All right, next.

[Brady]

This is a young Sean Connery on a date.

That's a guy basically bips him on the back of the head with the helmet.

[John Holmberg]

Why is he young Sean Connery?

[Brady]

Because.

Because his advice on how to handle women.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he takes a swing at her knee. She gets on the back of his motorcycle. She keeps hitting him. That's three, four shots. Five shots. Drops the bike. He's still standing. She's on the ground somehow. And he's like, all right, that's enough. He's taking matters into his own hands. He sweeps the leg twice, two kicks to the thigh high one, two to the head. Oh, she's dizzied. And she drops down. That's a concussion. Drop date is over. Yeah. This is the worst Tinder date ever.

And he got back on his scooter.

[Brett Vesely]

Peace out.

[John Holmberg]

And rode back to Toledo's hotel and served him dinner. What a nightmare. Well, he threw some shots. I gotta say, she took those two leg kicks like a champ. And he knows how to kick. And then he threw two haymakers to her head. I think she might have been out on her feet. Feet. Took her a second to go down. If anything, take pride in the fact that you can take that kind of shot.

[Brady]

Lady.

It'S Christmas card day. This is a video card. Merry Christmas from India, John.

[John Holmberg]

We're in India. Dirtiest street in the world. Here comes a motorcycle. They're lighting a firework or something. The firework's not really going off, but it's a filthy, filthy road in India called. Whoa. It goes mushroom cloud.

[Brady]

There goes the flaming Indian.

[John Holmberg]

And the flaming Indian. I'm sorry. The flaming Indian is rumchata fireball. I think that's it. Rumchata fireball. And I think you put a churro in it, boy.

[Brett Vesely]

Curry's, huh?

[John Holmberg]

Curry.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They blow up their curry. Well, it's because there's so much methane in the air from the gas kebab. Yeah, the feces that's in their sewers. Yeah, he blew it. What, did they light that?

[Brady]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

The whole city burned down. And then. He's not. He's never seen the stop, drop and roll because on fire. He's now the fastest Indian in the history of the country.

[Brett Vesely]

Look at this guy. Average white guy, 21. Is that how Curry's made.

Comments?

[John Holmberg]

How do you make it? You blow up the city street and you light yourself on fire and you run down the road, and then you take what's in your pants and you put it on a plate. Yuck.

[Brady]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

By the way, Brady, rumchata smells like old condoms. That's according to Adam Marago. I've never had rumchata because I think it's for.

Gays. And that's why the old condom sense is involved.

[Brady]

I knew about that cinnamon toast crunch. It was at a Christmas party. Someone had.

[John Holmberg]

Well, you don't drink, so you like the candy drinks. Yeah. You're not a drinker, so those things appeal to you.

[Brady]

I can't see.

[John Holmberg]

Well, not. Nobody can pound a bunch just like it, but no one is. My friend Antonio orders breakfast shots, and it's.

[Brett Vesely]

Those are good because the bacon.

[John Holmberg]

There's bacon. I don't know how you do it. And it tastes like you're eating French toast, bacon and eggs, and you chase it with orange juice, and it's some weird butterscotch thing. And I'm like, this is the gayest order of all time. There's like 15 of them. Like, give me two more of those.

[Brett Vesely]

It's like Jameson butterscotch.

[John Holmberg]

And the shot's horrible.

[Brett Vesely]

Something else.

[John Holmberg]

You throw the OJ down. You're like, that's breakfast. Isn't that amazing? And your brain's fooled. And it wasn't so much that it was good good. It was just like, I need to do that again to figure out how that worked. It was science.

[Brady]

Peanut butter and jelly's pretty good, too.

[John Holmberg]

But see, I don't want that. I'm not a teenager.

[Brett Vesely]

The pub and Grub one over there in Mesa. That's really good because I go to the mix it all up, and they got the grill right behind the bar, so the bacon is still hot when they bring it out.

[John Holmberg]

But the thing is, when you order that at the pub and grub, the bartender turns and goes, hey, this guy just tried to suck my. No, I didn't. I just ordered it.

[Brady]

There.

[Brett Vesely]

That is their famous shot.

[John Holmberg]

I couldn't order it.

[Brett Vesely]

Everybody goes there and does.

[John Holmberg]

A girl has to order it for the whole table. There are rules with that. You start getting cinnamon toast crunches and peanut butter and jellies, you're done. All right, what do you got?

[Brett Vesely]

The. This. The. The carisseria somewhere on the west side or something.

[John Holmberg]

This is definitely enough. Oh, this guy's got a bat. He's walking around with a bat behind his head. He's walking up to another guy. That guy pulls something out of his pocket. I think he's going to try to pay him or make a phone call. Oh, there's another. Oh, he's getting. He's getting a.

All right, let's recap. Let's recap what just happened. A little Asian man about 5ft tall. So the tallest Asian man in this country is walking up to a table with his shirt off and a bat behind his back. He walks up to a guy sitting down. They start making those noises they make called language and that. You don't know why he's mad at him. And then a lady pops up from under the table, and she's clearly blowing that guy. But my guess is the guy with the bat is that girl's real boyfriend getting a manicure or maybe a pedicure.

[Brady]

Because there was his pants. There was nothing.

[John Holmberg]

Very possibly. Well, Brady, that's racist. Just because you couldn't see his dick. The Asians have penises. They're just not as big.

[Brady]

Zipped up.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's how they look when they're out compared to us.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's a. Here's a nice stage dive.

[John Holmberg]

All right, we're at a concert. There's some frat boy in camo shorts and a blue shirt. He looks like an idiot. Already ready? He's about to jump off of a kid rock cover band stage or something. He leaps and nobody catches him. Doesn't care. Doesn't even make the security. Hits the barrier with his chest.

After being Courage by not Kid Rock, but someone who looks a lot like him. Was that a Morgan Wallen show? Probably. Only a country fan would do something that dumb.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's A little drone footage for you.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, are we in the Ukraine? We're shooting a drone out of an apartment that has a hole in the side of the wall.

[Brady]

Wall.

[John Holmberg]

And here comes. Oh, no, there's going to be something coming into it. They're firing up the drone. Off it goes. Oh, it crashed right outside the window. And it blew up some Russian guy's house.

It didn't make it out the window. Oh, that was awesome. And that's why Russia's losing.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, yeah.

[Brady]

It was like the modern day Wright Brothers.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. That thing went about 8ft.

And I.

[Brett Vesely]

Don'T know about this one.

[John Holmberg]

All right, that's AI. There's a lady with her head on fire. Yeah. Standing in the middle of a road in a terrible country that has lots of rickshaws and carts. She's lit her head on fire. It does seem like pretty good, these Toledo home videos. Yeah. Yeah. Everyone in a cooly hat riding by on their motorcycle doesn't seem to mind that there's a woman with her head literally lit on fire. But it didn't change. Like, that had to be AI.

[Brett Vesely]

And this is. This was just dumb.

[John Holmberg]

All right.

[Brett Vesely]

I like that we talk about the inflatable things.

[John Holmberg]

Waving. Inflatable arm flailing.

[Brady]

Tube man.

[John Holmberg]

He leaned back and his hand is the only thing whipping on. It looks like the inflatable incredible tube man is beating off in front of a woman's store called Bella.

That's a gem.

[Brett Vesely]

Tweaker in an elevator.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, we got a drug addict losing his mind in an elevator. Door opens up. He's. He's in a Johnny bench squat. Oh, now he's smoking his crack.

[Brady]

One more hit. One more. Two.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, he's gonna go up and down in the elevator another couple floors. Oh, he's doing it through his nose. He's smoking the glass.

And he just keeps. The door keeps opening and closing, and he keeps. And he's screaming. He looks like Pete Townsend. Oh, now he's very flexible. He put the pipe up against his butt. I'm not sure if that's coming. If that's. Well, he is just losing his mind in this elevator now he's got his legs spread all the way open. He's gonna pull his pants down, put that pipe in his ass, isn't he?

[Brady]

What in the world?

[John Holmberg]

There he is again. Get some help, man. Oh, man. He just lives in that elevator, Right?

[Brady]

Guess meth commercial or whatever.

[Brett Vesely]

And then we'll just lie.

[John Holmberg]

I look like he's kind of fun.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

And then we'll end with A little dental work.

[John Holmberg]

Oh. Oh, I'm gonna lose this. Okay, there's an Asian lady. They've got a pair of pliers in her mouth, and they're pulling out a giant tooth. And it's this. I don't know.

[Brady]

This is Tonsil stove.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, my Lord. No. That's too close to the front. What is this? It's in the. Oh, my God. It's the size of a baseball. It was stuck in the roof of her mouth. Mouth. She has no. Oh, they're going back in for some more. Oh, they're pulling out the front teeth with these pliers.

[Brady]

It's the.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know what it is. She's not even budging. Here's another. They got bigger pliers, and they're pulling out more.

You feel some pressure?

Oh, they're just cracking her teeth face. These pliers are barely getting it done. This lady's not even squinting. Well, maybe she is. I can't tell the whole thing. Her whole upper rack is coming out. It's like. Give me the rinse right now. Yeah. Where's the water? Where's some water? It's breaking up in her mouth. Oh, this is.

Torture. Why?

[Brett Vesely]

We'll end there.

[John Holmberg]

Brett's top 10 videos of 2025 will be played live for all of you at Homework After Dark.

[Brett Vesely]

We already have 10 of the. Well, we'll probably add a couple more in, but Bailey just put together his. Yeah, we'll do the.

[John Holmberg]

We'll do the.

[Brett Vesely]

I haven't watched him yet.

[John Holmberg]

We'll do the. Sift through and find out what we've got. It's happening at stand up live, 9:45pm Throw out our special guests out there. You already know Caliento's gonna be there.

[Brett Vesely]

He's gonna hide in the curtains again. When those videos start like last time, time.

[John Holmberg]

Lovett's will be there. And then one incredibly special guest who's our guest of the year, will be there, too. Jay Farrow was supposed to be there, but he had to cancel.

Man, oh, man, that was hard to watch. There you go, everybody. That is your Brady Report. It's 98 KUPD.

[Brady]

It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually.

[John Holmberg]

No membership fee. I have heard enough of this.

Morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.

The Offspring is the artist of the week this week, and, man, we just announced another concert yesterday for this deal. So what? The deal is if you tap the artist of the week, in this case, Offspring, last week I think was Linkin park or one of the last two weeks. I've got my weeks all confused used. And you do that while you're listening on the app. You are then qualified to be the winner of the KUPD Concert Pass. You'll get all the tickets to every show that we offer next year, all of 2026. You just tap the track on the KUPD app or web stream every time you hear this week's artist, which again, Offspring just heard it, got a shot at that and you're entered in there for that. This week is the second to last. No. Okay. With two more weeks after this ends, the 21st first of December, and you keep going. And then, of course, if you're thinking about, like, what will I get? 9 inch nails tickets are with this bad flower. Black Label Society's coming to town. Motley Crue. Motley Crue, Tesla and Extreme. Two thirds of that's going to be awesome. And then Extreme is going to go on stage three days Grace. Electric Call Boy is going to be here in April. And then the one Larry announced yesterday, Avenge Sevenfolds coming here on August 27th. You get tickets to all of them if you've got the KUPD Annual Concert Pass. That's how that works. So we just played Offspring. Knock it down, make it a thing. Simple stuff. So make that a deal and get on that and maybe you can win yourself a huge prize. That is a massive. I don't even know what the monetary value of that would be, but you can sell a lot of those tickets.

Pussifers coming. And this is just what we have now. Now Evanescence with Spirit Box and Nova Twins.

[Brett Vesely]

And we haven't even announced all the summer shows that'll probably be rolling through.

[John Holmberg]

I mean the. The one. Yesterday's first announcement for summer. Summer. I mean, Evanescence is in July. I guess we got a couple of them. Avenge Sevenfold Cruise in September.

You're going to start seeing them start rolling out for next year. And if it's on our concert calendar and you win this pass, you get tickets to all of it.

My littering campaign is going great.

[Brady]

Great.

[John Holmberg]

Phil said. I'm listening to you up here in Sedona, mountain biking. And I just hung my pinch flat intestine from my tire in a pine. A pine tree. Merry Christmas, hippies. That's right. He littered the the by the way. Go tubeless. Get up to action Ride shop and go tubeless. No more pinch flats, no more silliness. Nothing more frustrating than your tubes going out. And you got to take all that out. But like he's doing just litter it.

[Brett Vesely]

Brady's calling out McGriddle rats rolling down the street.

[John Holmberg]

Brady actually tried to connect, convince us that he could see trash on the road. From where he's sitting, looks a little bit like a McGriddle rapper. Like anybody in the room be like, yeah, he's probably right. Like, you can ID trash from here. Turns out it was a McGriddle rapper. The guy. Guy's not only got a nose for it, but he can cite used to be McGriddle in that he's the crying Indian because he's. He's just mad he didn't get any of that McGriddle and my. My campaign for littering, which is I think going incredibly well. Well, because people are hopefully littering a lot. This morning as my fight against this recycling nonsense continues after the videos I saw in India and reminder Again, we're 3.9% of the world's population. Even if the entire country was doing it right, we wouldn't make a dent in this thing. So we got to change how we do stuff. So I'm making a point. I'm Boston Tea Partying. Partying. This entire environmental nonsense that they forced down our throats do it different, differently. And then I got an email, in fairness from a guy named Matthew. He works for City Recycling and Sorting. He says, I'm with Solid Waste department for the city of Phoenix. You know what I'm glad at in my life that I don't have to tell people that I'm with solid waste, because that's an offensive thing to say about your wife. I'm John with solid Waste. This is Megan.

See what I did there?

[Brady]

Better than loose waste.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Well, it solidifies in the wrong station. Loose waste day. I wonder if there's a department just for the loose stuff. Like if your toilet can put that in the loose side. Anyways, with Solid Waste Department, he said, I'm also a very long time listener. My first show of listening to you was 9 11. Well, that's really. That was when we grabbed so many hearts and minds. I'm so good. We. That bit went really well.

[Brady]

Pure comedy.

[John Holmberg]

That. That bit went great. Great. People are like, man, ever since you're 911 bit, I've been locked in. He says, I work for the side of the department that has the inspectors that go out and address complaints and educates residents. Oh, my God. If you ever knock on my door to educate me about what's in my trash, I'm putting one through you. Recycling being one of the subjects that we educate on. Being that I'm a regular listener and I heard your discussion today. I can assure you that recycling is a massive operation for the city of Phoenix. And our two transfer stations not only have a large and expensive equipment equipment put in there to deal with the different recyclable materials, but we also have the personnel slash sorters who stand by the conveyor belts and pick out and sort. I don't believe you. I know you're a busy guy, but if you're curious, below is a video showing the entire operation. It's A.I. you're going to. I'm one of those people now. I'm one of those here's throw that outside. Throw it out trips in here. Chuck that thing out of here. Don't you bring in that trash. You throw that outside where it belongs. Mr. Reeb, hold on. I'm reading a letter from the city. You'll probably get one too. Says well, checking recycling containers is something that we do. It's because the program is active. An unacceptable material that comes into play that plays havoc for the equipment and the sorters we have. We used to have a team of people that would go around and check recycle containers but that has since been disabled since the beatings don't go through my trash. Are you with me on that one? Trip is not happy. What's going on on I'll let you speak. I'm walking in front of the building trying to clean up the trash.

Well, on the sidewalk. Where are you going to put it?

In a recycle. Well at least yeah, just put it in any trash recycle here. We don't. No. Since what were all the blue cans for? Those were from years ago. Ah, this is the trip rev I love. We canceled our recycling years ago. No, Susie, Susie, cut that out. No kidding. Three years ago. Oh, this is great. Can I paint all the trash cans black and like put a skull and crossbones on in here? We've got them all over the building. Oh yeah? Well what are we gonna do? Throw those out?

Well, we gotta paint them and get rid of that. Little weird because the girls downstairs get mad at me when I throw things away in the wrong ones. Oh, there is no wrong one. No one knows this.

[Brady]

Couple of girls took a swing at everybody.

[John Holmberg]

You need to put out a memo.

[Brett Vesely]

Knock off I tell you what memo.

[John Holmberg]

Put it out there. Just say dear Stack, I want that.

[Brady]

Metal out this afternoon.

[John Holmberg]

Knock off all the libtard crap you open I didn't know that. Where the. Outside. Where those. The trash. Yeah. The trash dumpsters are. Yeah. There's not a recycling one. I've been here when the trash. The cleaning crew's here. And they just dump everything in the same can. Yeah. Because they. It all goes. I thought they were just in on it with me. No.

We don't recycle because we don't care. We don't have Hubbard print because we know it doesn't. Oh, this is what I love to hear. Thank you. Trip reads on my side. Litter immediately.

That's exactly what you're saying. Litter something immediately. Trip says there's no point in this nonsense. Chuck it. Like you back in your day just chucked it out the window. Nobody cared.

[Brady]

Did you?

[John Holmberg]

Literally. Here's the thing. Yeah. Oh, he. I can remember as a child. Child. Driving on the Garden. The Garden State. Anyway. Oh, it's a beautiful garden. And my mom throwing stuff. Throwing lunch stuff out the window.

[Brady]

Come on.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, I remember being a kid. And it was literally a thing for us too. That was just what you did. We loved littering. My dad. Nothing out the window. Yeah. Yeah, same. And we were better off. There was no island of plastic in the ocean. Well, that. They're. You are correct. Yeah. We were better when we littered. But don't throw stuff in front of the station. How about LG LGE's parking lot? Let them handle our video west. Trying to be a good neighbor. Well, what do we care? Let's. Let's. Yeah. Video West. There's. They got people. That's a good one. All right, Trip Reeb. You heard it here, everybody. Recycling doesn't work. Yeah. Throw it out the window like mom used to make. Make.

Well, that's perfect. You heard it from our. Our bosses. So don't even write him a letter if you're mad at me because he's just gonna. And he's gonna throw it out the window.

Anyway. Matthew, I guess I was right in the.

[Brady]

The wheelhouse of, you know, woodsy and all that.

[John Holmberg]

So was I. I'm younger than you.

[Brady]

I know. I'm surprised.

[John Holmberg]

Look, you may. No, you may not.

[Brady]

A lot too. You also.

[John Holmberg]

We did too. And we cleaned up campsites. But for the most part.

[Brady]

Part.

[John Holmberg]

Driving down the freeway and you had something in your car. You chucked it out. And I guarantee you your rose colored glasses are covering up.

[Brady]

My dad never did that.

[John Holmberg]

Plenty of times. Your mom would chuck.

[Brady]

Bunny. Chuck some cigarettes.

[John Holmberg]

Cigarettes. Coffee cups. But also, it was a lot of that stuff.

[Brady]

Chardonnay.

[John Holmberg]

Wasn't disposable back then. So you had it like a mug or something. You couldn't just chuck it out. Then they started giving you all the things you can. I want this in my car. Right out the window. Oh, I remember my mom chucking stuff out the window, too. Indiana. You were from Ohio. You're not that high up. There are Midwestern Hill Jacks there, too. Trust me. Your parents chuck things out windows just like the rest of us did back in the day. There's a reason a crying Indian showed up and he. What's the first thing in the commercial? He's standing by freeway while people just chuck.

[Brady]

That hit home with me.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Cause you were. That was your mom chucking out your lunch. That was a full bag of food. That's why I'd hit home. Anyway, Matthew. You heard my boss talking. I know Matthew from Solid Way Waste. Worst card I've ever seen in my life. By the way, Matthew, I won't give his last name. Says Solid Waste Supervisor on his. On his signature. Like, that's gross. Does that mean at home when somebody's like, I gotta take a dump? He's like, let me. I'll go in there and referee that. No, no, I don't. I. Super. I supervise solid waste. My job.

I'm good at it. God damn it.

How do you get fired from that? We've been eyeballing. You gotta try how you supervise the solid waste. And we think you're making a lot of mistakes.

[Brady]

A lot of loose stuff's getting through.

[John Holmberg]

A lot of loose things getting through in this solid waste. Saw a couple rogue tampis go into the loose. Some of the loose go into the salt. What are you doing, Matthew? You got trouble at home. We want to take care of you here at Solid Waste.

If they call it the Solid Waste Golf Tournament, I think less people. People would go.

[Brady]

The Solid Waste Christmas Party.

[John Holmberg]

I just don't think that's a good phrase. If we don't call them janitors anymore, we can't have Solid Waste supervisors. You got to come up with a better phrase than that.

How about refuse and refuse supervisor. That's even worse.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, that's.

[John Holmberg]

That's bad, too. It just makes sound like they're just rolling around in the garbage anyway. I'm just so happy that Tripp canceled all of our recycling, because. Why, Brady? Because you heard him. It just doesn't work. There's no point. Just throw it out the window. You heard him.

In fact, our holiday party. We're just gonna. There's Trip out there on the patio right now. There's trash just pouring it down on the lessers down this first floor.

Pick it up, Marcus.

I love that. What a day.

[Brady]

Day.

[John Holmberg]

I also. I need to take this. Whoops. Need to take this time to say thank you to Luke from Icon Equipment, who, if you were paying attention to the show. Two weeks ago, we buried a scissor lift in my backyard on the soft, soft grass.

[Brady]

Not on purpose.

[John Holmberg]

Of course not on purpose. It would do that.

[Brady]

Clarify that.

[John Holmberg]

Why would I do that on purpose? That goes without saying. I decided. I called up a guy from an equipment place and I said, hey, can we stall this in my yard? Sure. I'll be over at 10. So he came over two weeks ago and we. Because I was going to raise the lights on my basketball court another three feet, but I have to get up there to do it. Put the last posts in because I thought what I built was tall enough and it's a little low. The extra three feet is great. So we buried this thing in my backyard. And speaking of Tripp Reeb, when I told the story of how ridiculous it was that two guys. I used my jeep winch and we drugged this thing across. The only parts I have left in my backyard that are grass is where this had to go.

[Brady]

Go.

[John Holmberg]

And we drug this 4000 pound beast across my yard before we realized that it was getting deeper and not. It was digging in and it was stuck. Those things are heavy. And it started to pull my jeep across. It's a 12,000 pound winch. And it started to pull my jeep across the basketball court. I don't think this is a good idea. We even turned the wheels like to lock it in and still the jeep's like. And that thing wasn't moving. So we. We abandoned ship that day, parked it in the backyard, got the jeep out of the yard. And then last Saturday he came by again. And guess who showed up to watch. Tripp Reeb.

[Brett Vesely]

They have his box of popcorn and everything else watching.

[John Holmberg]

I want to watch fall out of that thing at the very least. And I don't think you guys are going to get it through. Well, he showed up after we were already on the second light pole because Luke and I figured it out. Sure, it took two days and about 12 hours of manpower to do 20 minutes of work. But so what?

So, Luke, thank you very much.

I owe you one in a big way. I don't know. I learned some new words that it's a.

[Brady]

You got charged extra days on the rental.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe. I don't know. It was a snorkel. It's called the snorkel. I don't know what that is, but it's a snorkel. That's the word. I. I don't know if I'm even saying that right. But it's something having to do with a snorkel. Are you going to Google snorkel scissor lifts? You grabbed your phone like that was of interest for you. Don't worry about it.

[Brady]

How much snorkel?

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. Well, you know what, what do we say 60 grand for?

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, it was more than that. I can't remember, but it was.

[John Holmberg]

Desert lifts were expensive. No, the booms were like.

[Brett Vesely]

This was just like one. It was like 189. And that was the boom.

[John Holmberg]

But we got it done, and Luke and I got that project finished. So it was pretty great. And I want to thank Luke for coming out there. And we just got some plywood and we rolled it right over, winched it right up, put the lights in. Now, I will say that trip was privy to the first light that we put on, because all of my projects are terrible. Terrible. As I was pounding in the top three feet, the new post on top. Because it's just a series of posts you can add.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And they're steel. And it was nice. And so I'm putting them in there. And somehow another. As I was pounding it in there, I was making the pole. We probably. Whoops. Or we probably went three feet. Tugged it towards us. Three feet. So when we got down, it's bent. Yeah. It was like a 60 degree angle.

[Brady]

Whack it back into shape.

[John Holmberg]

So I took some. I did what I do do now. Sure, I could dig a hole and prop it back up and pour some quick crete in there and let it set.

[Brady]

No.

[John Holmberg]

You get a bunch of garden stakes and you drive as many as you need into the ground in front of that pole until it no longer leans.

Mission accomplished. Then you get some decorative rock and you pour it over the garden stakes. No one. No one's any the wiser. It would take a tornado to knock that thing down. It is so rigged into the ground, it's ridiculous. Learned our lesson. Second pole didn't budge. We used a bunch of lube to slide the big black stick into the little black hole.

[Brett Vesely]

What is this a Rico Blaze video.

[John Holmberg]

You guys are filming right in there? And Tripp came by and he goes, huh. I'm a little bit impressed. Except for that one looks like it's doing a Heil Hitler. And then he threw his trash in the ground and he left. Pretty impressive.

I'm a little, little bug.

[Brady]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Where do you put your trash, John? Oh, just throw it in the can over there. No, that's where you put it.

[Brady]

Watch.

[John Holmberg]

And he just threw it on the ground.

Now it's for you, mom. And he pointed to the sky.

That's for you, old lady. Yeah, still doing it the way she taught me.

That's why he's got that convertible. Just throws it straight up in gone.

Two hands. It's like a gender reveal party in here. There's just. Just stuff flying around own.

Anyway, so litter immediately. No matter what that guy from Solid Way says. And he seems like a nice, well thought out man. But I've made up my mind on this. It's crap. That's crap. We've got the hot releases coming up in just a little bit. Get ready for those. It's 98.

[Brady]

Hey, it's not weird. It's pretty cool actually.

[John Holmberg]

No membership fees. I have heard enough of this.

[Brett Vesely]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP guns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[John Holmberg]

The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.

More. This is breaking news. Just got this video put in before we get to hot releases in a little while. The Cinnabon girl. Oh, that old Neil Young song. The Cinnabon girl. Remember that? God love that one. Oh, yeah.

What?

[Brett Vesely]

This video is basically like somebody else that filmed it. It wasn't that. So like kind of in the background.

[John Holmberg]

So she thought the Somalis were the only ones filming her. There was someone else that heard some loud sounds coming out of the Cinnabon and said, how does Cinnabon go south? Cinnabon's heaven. And those Somali ladies and the crazy woman that called them the N word several times is now being filled from somewhere else. And the phrase you're listening for is Paint your face somewhere else, you fat effing bug eyed bitch. All right, here we go.

[Brett Vesely]

That's phrase of pays.

[John Holmberg]

Welcome to Cinnabon. And we're all.

What's recording doing for you? Show me who you are. Get the out of here.

And the husband's trying to whip the lady away.

Here we go. And now she's filming her. So you got to five different people. I still know who the you are, man, cuz you put banana on your head.

How bad did this get? She came with the white.

I need to know the backstory on she scammed her.

What a psycho.

Live for moments like this. And they got her again.

And then she. That's when she started throwing pots and pans. I can't. You're right. But I would. But I.

Now the Somalis aren't doing themselves any favors by not walking away. But he kept that Cinnabon. I was right. Look, he's still got it in his hand.

The one thing he didn't do was give back that delicious treat to that crazy racist that served you them.

The last thing I'm going to do to teach you a lesson is give you back this delicious frosted treat. Last. The last thing that is happening in this argument about how you dera are giving me food is to take that food and not eat it. You don't know what I went through as a child. I will eat poop. Oh, you spit in my Cinnabon. Big deal. I ate my brother's heart once.

[Brady]

Evidently his wife or girlfriend been working her five times.

[John Holmberg]

We have to go back.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

To before the video started rolling on how that transaction went so south.

It's Cinnabon.

Can't even be mad at a Cinnabon.

No, I gotta know more. More video, please. And I don't know what's the. What's the tally on her on her GoFundMe page? Because yesterday it was at a hundred thousand dollars for people saving this poor white woman from. You know, she says that the employee accused the woman of harassing her, previously confronting her with white bitch comments and now coming back as a black bitch. Interestingly enough, the employee knows full well she's being recorded, but doesn't stop her from breaking that N word out at the end of the video, which we saw yesterday. And they did it immediately. Cinnabon, of course, doesn't want anything to do with this. And I don't want Cinnabon involved in this at all. Cinnabon is a delicious treat in American treasure.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know if this is the same one because is this one's only at 6100-45K.

[John Holmberg]

Another Cinnabon racial moment occurred.

[Brett Vesely]

Well, no, it's the same broad, but I might be a different GoFundMe for the same cause.

[John Holmberg]

Help for cousins. Legal fees. Don't fall for that scam. If anybody's trying to raise money for this chick on the side, she's got $6,100 for her too.

[Brady]

Go back to that one because it.

[Brett Vesely]

I was seeing if there's another.

[John Holmberg]

She looks crazy. Yeah. So the cousins are Wisconsin. The cousins Are are trying to raise money for the family as well. Because you know you can't replace that. It's too hard to replace that Cinnabon income. You have to have a Gofundme. Can't go get another job.

[Brady]

The couple also has a Gofundme.

[John Holmberg]

They do.

[Brady]

It looked like it.

On that last one we had.

[John Holmberg]

Wait, why do they need money? They didn't lose their job.

[Brady]

This one, Sabrina Osman.

[John Holmberg]

For.

[Brady]

For here.

[John Holmberg]

I'm guessing those are Somali names you're trying to say.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, so maybe this is the money.

[John Holmberg]

For the raising Gofundme to help her.

[Brady]

Legal fees and lawyer cost to pursue justice. They're going to sue Cinnabon, my cousin. Well, I'm sure they are here, Ahmed. Yep.

[John Holmberg]

Don't make me side with that crazy Cinnabon racist. Don't you dare sue the American treasure known as Cinnabon just because one lady went crazy.

[Brady]

Cinnabon? Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

It's not their fault. They got rid of her.

[Brady]

So they got $6,700 in legal fees.

[John Holmberg]

They're not going to cover much on that. And I think it's going to be a pretty. Just call Cinnabon and go, hey, we're going to sue you. If you don't give it, they'll give you like a lifetime supply. You have hit the jackpot.

What's her name? Wiley something.

[Brady]

Crystal.

[Brett Vesely]

Crystal.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Crystal. Okay.

[Brady]

Wilsy.

[John Holmberg]

Wilsey.

[Brett Vesely]

Crystal. Probably Fitzer.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. How much. How much has she raised? She got herself 200 trying to find it.

It's outstanding. Outstanding. It's outstanding. And then you get all the. Immediately people get up 120k. 120,000 over 120k. Pretty good. Nice job. It says John. It's called race exhaustion. We're tired of them acting like they're still in a third world country and believing we need to adjust to them. They're adjusting us pretty good. They're in line at Cinnabon.

I think there's adjustments that have been made. Maybe they said something a little quote, pardon the punishment off color. But as an. As a. As a person with the job and the name tag on, you just know not to do that. Maybe you're exhausted, but you do what a decent human being would do. You push it down until you get in the car and then you say all the racial slurs you want while you're listening to, you know, rap. More than likely you've got like a Gunna or a Bad Bunny song on. And then you shoot your racial slurs at the radio like you're doing now.

She does not like those Somalians. Both people could have pushed that down a little bit. And I understand what Jesse's saying, but race exhaustion. You work at Cinnabon, you're not on the front lines of the race battle. You're at Cinnabon, you're an hourly employee making amazing buns.

And she looks to be in her late 20s. I don't know how old that lady is.

[Brady]

Is says 43.

[John Holmberg]

She's 43. Life hasn't worked out if you're still working the counter at Cinnabon and you're 43. Unless you're a multi millionaire.

[Brady]

It all adds up, John.

[John Holmberg]

That, well, it's just pent up oils over, over. She's done. And the big problem that's kept her from having a decent job all these years is her hatred towards Somalians. She just can't, can't catch a break up there in Wisconsin. Running into one or two of them, those paper thin human beings. She'd love to just fax them all back to Somalia.

[Brett Vesely]

There's one. 130,000.

[John Holmberg]

Wow.

[Brett Vesely]

Goal is 271,000.

[John Holmberg]

Why? Why is that? Why is her goal 271? That's what it's going to take to make up my lost resources.

[Brett Vesely]

I'm crazy eyes.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, she's 43 and works the counter at Cinnabon. She is Jean Takovic. She's in witness relocation and she just snapped. I love this story. This, this is slowly becoming My favorite story. 20, 25, 270.

[Brady]

No white person should lose their job refusing to be harassed by Somalians.

[John Holmberg]

Evidence.

[Brett Vesely]

So fellow racist donated $5.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, there the guys whose name is fellow racist. I'm also racist. Here's a Lincoln. Ironically, he gives a Lincoln for that.

Anyway, hilarious story. Love every second of it.

And it's real easy not to explode on Somalians or just walk away way and whisper the slurs like us decent whites have been doing for years.

You don't yell it out. Gives everybody a bad name. Keep it under your breath. You mumble.

Say all you need.

[Brett Vesely]

20 bucks given to I. I hate Somalis too.

[John Holmberg]

Wow, that guy's got a classy name.

Anyway, I get it. I get it. People are upset at everything.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh geez, I'm not reading that one.

[John Holmberg]

No, there's some you don't read. I can't see it. What's it say?

[Brady]

Well, it mentions something about.

[John Holmberg]

Oh no, it's got the word mud and shark in it. Jesus. That's in the comments. See, we got a problem It's Cinnabon. And go back to yesterday's talk. How bad can life be if a you've got Cinnabon around you 24 hours a day day. And you're just about to eat one. I can't even be mad holding the Cinnab.

[Brady]

Got back from Minneapolis. The fatigue is real. God bless.

[John Holmberg]

It does say God bless.

It's what the Lord would have wanted. The widest Cinnabon in the world. I don't why these smiling think that their cinnamon treats are any different than ours. Don't you give them a cinnamon bun, God damn it. Till they show some sort of proof of residency.

It was just a fight. We made it about like a national stance. It was a angry white woman and two angry Somalian people fighting at the cinema. And we make it seem like America's problem. 271 grand. That's the going rate for losing your job for saying the N word to some immigrants. A lot of you aren't making 271 a year. It's worth it. So while you're littering today, try to lose your job on film by calling one of your diverse co workers a horrible slur. Now you're probably going to get punched, but in the end, when you get fired, start that Gofundme and Heinrich Himmler and Racist2 and all these other people start throwing cashier direction.

If you're currently not making quarter of a million dollars a year. Totally worth it to slur at employees today on film. Because that's how the United States will works, not just the US of A.

The Internet comments are pretty great.

[Brett Vesely]

There's something.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, enjoy that. Well, that's the latest. That's breaking news. Breaking news.

As KUPD's news team is out there on a fact hunt. Don't say that fast. Fact hunt. That sounds terrible.

[Brett Vesely]

Look at this one.

[John Holmberg]

What's that say? I can't see it from here.

[Brett Vesely]

I'm not reading it.

[John Holmberg]

All right, well then we shouldn't read it. Oh, yeah. No, that's. No. Yeah, yeah. How do you do that? How do you get on a keyboard and fire that off and go enter published it.

[Brett Vesely]

I'm not even laughing at that one.

[John Holmberg]

That's. No, it's horrible. I don't know how you type those words and then say okie dokie and then go on your about your day. Day people are horrible. Anyway, we got the hot releases coming up a little bit. Thanks for following us on the KPD News Team. Fact hunt. I like my new phrase.

Troy Hayden. Fact hunt.

[Brady]

We need to find something on them.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna be saying that a lot. Mark Curtis, Troy Hayden Karibay, Divine. Fact Hunt.

Fact Hunt. Boy, does that sound bad. Anyway, good luck to all of you. It's a hot release. Is coming up in just seconds. It's 98.

[Brett Vesely]

Hey.

[John Holmberg]

It's not weird. It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee. I have heard enough of this.

Morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.

Tab it, Tap it. Tap, tap, tap it. And get that pass put in your pocket. Larry McFeely, everybody. What you got? You know that includes the stuff that we're going to announce next year. That's right. Yeah. Oh, yeah. No, everything. I say that all the time. If. Yeah. If we. Because we event or announced Avenge Sevenfold yesterday. Those tickets are. They're on there now. So if we get any shows that pop up in January for next. Any show that we talk about and put on now. The only thing that wouldn't count. Oh. Is. Is late next year. We're saying, hey, coming up in 2027. Wouldn't make any sense that people would think that. Right. Hopefully we don't give that pass to an idiot. But there is the chance. It's a good thing that you covered those. Never know. Because I would swipe the past from that person. We just announced it in February.

2026. Give me the pass back. You've lost your pass. Means I get those. Any concert schedule scheduled in 20. In 2026 that we have on the concert calendar is yours. Yeah. Which includes events sevenfold. Which includes Evanescence, which includes Motley Crue. Already. Yeah. Nine Inch Nails.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You got them all extreme. And we just send them to the person. Like here's another batch of tickets. Or do they have to add.

[Brett Vesely]

I told Rudy.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Was that whoever wins this thing, we're gonna have to become best buddies with them.

[Brett Vesely]

Because every time a concert comes up.

[John Holmberg]

We'Re gonna have to put a pair. Whether they want it or not. Not. Cuz then they can sell them.

[Brady]

Right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Okay. That's gold right there. You don't have to ask if you win the pass. Every pair. We're just. We're. We're going to bombard you. Yeah. Perfect. Larry. This is a good contest. I like what you're doing around here, buddy. I like what you're doing. All right. It's time for us to do this. Brady always is like, look at what he's doing over there. Go litter outside. Follow my campaign.

[Brett Vesely]

That was just brought up in our department head.

[John Holmberg]

Was it by Trip? Yeah. This littering thing's going crazy.

[Brady]

Great.

[John Holmberg]

Is that what he said? Yeah. Yeah. Throw all your garbage up and throw it outside. We don't do any. We don't care. Look, this place is on fire. It doesn't really matter. You're not all going to be here soon anyway. Except you, Brady. I lied to Brady.

It's time for the hot releases. Even though Toledo's gone and we can't figure out exactly what happened, he has a cat that needs to go to the doctor. That's kidney stones. Got a cat like an old man. I'm all for helping out animals and stuff, but now we're worried that Toledo's dead. Who haven't heard from him the whole time. Usually he shoots right back here. What's that boy doing at his house? Got a cat with a vet visit. At 8 in the morning? Yeah. The boy's laying in the bed doing nothing. Toledo had to leave his job so his wife wouldn't be late for her job and got some deadbeat laying in bed there. Toledo's doing all of the work.

He's doing more work there than he is here. He's not back, so now I'm worried. He's, you know, been taken.

Toledo's been taken and I won't look for him now. Hiring. I don't know what to think. Hopefully he's all right. Toledo should get back to us. You've been gone for a couple hours.

Makes you nervous. Anyway, it's time for the hot releases. They're brought to you by our [e-mail]. hey, there's a good deal going on over there. Get a thousand dollars off. If you put Holmberg in the promo code, that'll start you a thousand dollars less than any of the price would have been. And you're already going to save a bunch of money because their whole logo and their whole catchphrases. Save thousands, save time, buy online. New ac unit.com. knock another thousand off by just simply writing Holmberg. H O L M B E R G. That's me. Put it in the promo code code. And you'll get another thousand off. New AC Unit.com brings you the hot releases. You're the only one here, Brett, so release me.

[Brett Vesely]

What am I doing here?

[John Holmberg]

Well, you know what? I'll get through this because I saw some videos first and I'll do the TV and stuff, okay? There's nothing else to do. Holmberg assignment for you guys. I don't know if you're on it, Brady. You seem to be ahead of the curve on all these things. You watch a lot of the tv, Netflix, Puff Daddy, Doc. Have you watched it? You watched the whole thing already? And you have a lot going on in there. You know, you hit that couch and veg it. I love, love it.

[Brady]

Over the last two days.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, there's four episodes, and the first episode locks you in, and it's done by Fitty Scent, who hates him. Oh, that's a little bit. Oh, yeah. But the first episode, you're kind of like, man, they're almost making me feel sorry for Diddy.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Until he starts getting the accusations and then the knock around video and you're like. And he punched his mom and. But they did a good job of being like, hey, we asked him to defend himself and he said no. Then. Then 50 Cent goes on ABC News to talk about the documentary and won't go anywhere else. And they asked him why and he said, because ABC is the only channel they show in the prison he's in. So I know he'll see this. He's trying to get P. Diddy to like, try to shoot him. Because if you don't know 50 Cent is Superman, you can't kill him with bullets. He's got like 11 of them floating around in him right now. He's been shot 131 times. So he's like, yeah, go ahead. I think he's trying to bait Diddy into a prison head hit on him because he's way out loud about pissing him off. This documentary. Jen Gardner downstairs wouldn't shut up. Yeah, you got to watch this. It's like it's going to get banned. And I'm like, really? And evidently it gets like you've seen it. So after a couple episodes.

[Brady]

Yeah, there are definitely some accusations coming out of that.

[John Holmberg]

Pretty good ones, too. And I didn't realize that P. Diddy killed a bunch of people in a. In a high school gym or a. A small college gym gym.

[Brady]

The trampling.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I didn't know that. Basketball. Full out trampling at a rap basketball.

Which everybody at the Wisconsin Cinnabon went typical. But it was a full on melee that happened at a rap basketball game.

[Brady]

Yep.

[John Holmberg]

And Diddy was the promoter when he was like 19 and a bunch of people got trampled to death. And he was the face of it and survived it somehow. It's pretty amazing. So watch that. You haven't watched it yet?

[Brett Vesely]

No, and I. Yeah, I just watched the Eddie Murphy one.

[John Holmberg]

I've been Behind. What'd you think of that?

[Brady]

It was okay.

[Brett Vesely]

I mean, there was some stuff I didn't know. But then the kind of. I'm like, it almost is stretched it.

[John Holmberg]

A Celebration of Eddie by Eddie.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah. That's kind of what I got out of it, too.

[John Holmberg]

Somebody else said, this is everything Great. I did. Yeah.

[Brady]

If you did the Diddy thing and see his documentary, like, Diddy's, like, where he did it himself, how much would differ? I don't ever know about this woman.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. But I mean, if Diddy did a documentary about himself, you know, it wouldn't be good.

[Brady]

It'd be like.

[John Holmberg]

Well, because it would be all live.

[Brady]

MTV performance thing would be on it.

[John Holmberg]

You can't do. Yeah. You can't do a documentary about your shortcomings and be honest about it. Remember N.W.A. the movie?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Skipped all the bad parts because the guy's in charge of making it with a Queen. There's that terrible movie about Queen, Death.

[Brady]

Row and Bad Boy. There are some women beating.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, man, did they used to swing on broads. But, yeah, the Queen movie, which is just atrocious by all standards outside of the Mutual Music, was done by Queen. So they didn't really do anything bad. They kind of kept it safe.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They showed you that Freddie Mercury blew a dude at a truck stop once. And you're like, well, we knew that.

And the only thing I learned from the Queen movie was he's got extra teeth. Remember they said that thing and he said, oh, yeah. He had other octaves because his mouth has extra teeth, which makes his mouth a little weirder.

[Brady]

So he has resonate.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I don't know. He's got a palate that's wider so he can maneuver his voice room. That was it, though. That's. I'm like, all right. And that's the last thing I want to hear before a dude goes and blows somebody in a bathroom. Extra teeth.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Yeesh. Anyway, watch the Diddy documentary if you haven't already. I'm not good at this, so I have no idea what else is coming out. Video games. There's a bunch of cool ones. They're doing another Flight Simulator 2024, but they added a bunch to it for PlayStation, so, you know, you can crash in all sorts of new cities and new ways. I would love to do the Malaysia air on the flight simulator and just see how, you know. I bet you they've done it where they simulate the flight. It's like, here's where it last was Heroes at Speed. And let's Just see how long it'll go until it runs out of gas. And then go search where the simulator says they still can't find that thing. They're starting a new search now. There's one called Dome keeper that's coming out December 9th. Dome Keeper looks kind of cool. It's got. It's basically hair treatment or something. No. You defend against waves of alien monsters. It's sort of like dig dug modern. Their hands are all. Create your dome bits. Yeah. And use time between. You dig beneath the surface and look for resources and relics and deliver them back to your dome and unlock powerful upgrades and stuff. So it's kind of a scavenger hunt in a weird way that you can do, which is kind of cool, I guess, if you like. It's. It's a fun one for adults. And then the other one that I saw, which was weird and Brett has pictures of it, was digging a hole. The game. Watch this. It's just literally, you dig hole and score points. There's the hole. You just dig holes with a shovel. Find stuff.

[Brett Vesely]

If you find any bodies, I bet.

[John Holmberg]

You there is a thing where you can find. And then you put the stuff in your cash register and you just raise funds for a racist Cinnabon employee by digging holes. And then you dig all the way down to the core of the earth.

[Brett Vesely]

You dig all the way to Somalia.

[John Holmberg]

It looks a little bit like a.

[Brady]

Colonial colonoscopy down a little stick of dynamite.

[John Holmberg]

Yes. It does look like the video of a colonoscopy, though. Yeah. There aren't many others, but. Oh, we found something in the hole alive.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, that's the.

[John Holmberg]

It's literally called a game about digging a hole. And its simplicity has me curious. December 10th, which is tomorrow, Mutant Football League 2 comes out for all the platforms. And I think that one looks pretty cool, too, where it's just mutants. And the best part about that is when you try to read about it, it makes you enter your birthday. So there must be something brutal about it. Or porn. And then Warhammer 40,000 for Switch 2 and Terminator 2D. No fate for all the other ones coming out on the 12th. So if you're shopping for somebody for Christmas, the video games are. There are times. Star Trek Infection for personal computers is out in a couple days, too. There's a lot of games coming out. Toledo. There's a lot to skip. He's not wrong. There's also this one called thank goodness you're here, which is weird because it's a video game about just Arriving. It's a comedy slap. Former.

Which basically it's a. It's. It's a bold bit of masterfully orchestrated comedy that confounds expectations at every turn. You're just basically going into places and fish out of water. Kind of stuff the whole game out of just being in a store instead of going to a store. You can do it on a game now.

[Brady]

We dig a hole in that store.

[John Holmberg]

If you bring that other game with you, maybe. Otherwise it's all just nerd games and Yakuza. That might be good. Brett, what do you got for music?

[Brett Vesely]

All right, music wise. Ooh, you made me play some Christmas music.

[John Holmberg]

I didn't make you.

[Brett Vesely]

You did. You're like.

[John Holmberg]

It was Christmas music. Nobody cares about Christmas. Everybody does. Look at the ratings. It's ridiculous. Ridiculous.

[Brett Vesely]

All right, so Kylie Minogue, who's one of the few expired ones that still got it.

[John Holmberg]

She looks great. Yes, she does.

[Brett Vesely]

This is hot in December.

[John Holmberg]

Whoa.

This is her Christmas release? I believe so, yeah.

[Brett Vesely]

What is it with those Australia Margot Rob?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You gotta remember, they're from Australia. So it's always hot in December. It's summer.

I was. When I was in Australia, I remember asking a guy, so what do you guys do for Christmas? Because, like, is it still the snow? And Rudolph? What's the story about the fat man? He goes, yeah, keep it all assignments easier. Like, she goes, just play pretend it's winter. Yeah. Like, do you put snow on the tree? Yeah, that's stupid. All the ornaments are the same. Like snow drenched Bondi beach, like here or what? Well, in the desert, sure. But it makes sense. We're at least in the northern hemisphere where it's winter time. We just have a mild winter there. It's not even winter.

[Brett Vesely]

Here's one from Luke Spiller. This is Merry Christmas, everyone.

[John Holmberg]

Who's Luke Spiller?

[Brett Vesely]

I have no idea.

[John Holmberg]

Country music guy trash, probably, but we'll play it anyway. Fred's very bitter. Are you hanging up?

Oh, Luke Spiller is the guy from the Struts.

[Brett Vesely]

Oh, the lead singer.

[John Holmberg]

Has.

[Brett Vesely]

Doesn't mean the song's not trash.

[John Holmberg]

If it's a Christmas song, it's still trash. What does he ride A red nose reindeer does he turn upon. He's gonna get. Yeah, he's gonna get that number one hit Christmas song that Britain does.

[Brett Vesely]

And then here's one for. For all the guys out there. For your wife. Wives. This is the Treadmill from Sam Fender. So buy your wife a treadmill for Christmas.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's just living life on a treadmill he's complaining or he's going to.

[Brett Vesely]

Buy his wife one.

[John Holmberg]

Now I'm curious about the Luke Spiller. I love the struts.

[Brett Vesely]

All right, let's see. Where do we go from here? Okay, we can do thunderstruck. Thunder Funk.

[John Holmberg]

AI.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

This is AI Funk. Thunderstruck.

I wouldn't even recognize it. You've been thunderstruck.

I still don't recognize.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Went through to Texas. Yeah, Texas. And we had some fun. I remember that from the song.

Some dancers who gave a good time.

Broke all the rules, played all the fools.

Has AI missed? Not.

[Brett Vesely]

Not often.

[John Holmberg]

They're like clive owen. Everything they touch is amazing. Jesus christ.

[Brett Vesely]

We could do hotel california blues soul restyle cover AI.

[John Holmberg]

We don't need people.

You know what I just realized.

AI is. This is sad and terrible, but it's true. Bear with me on this. AI On a dark desert highway oh, man. Feeds white people's needs for black people to work for them for free.

It'S true. Warm smell of. What's the first thing we did with AI Is make fake black people do stuff for us musically. Up ahead in the distance. We're not paying anybody. No, we're right back to where Roots, and I hate to use the word roots.

My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim I had to stop for the night. This thing's going to explode like a. There she stood in the doorway.

I heard the mission bell.

And I was thinking to myself this could be heaven. Well, this could be hell. I would dump so much money in this guy's tip jar if he was real.

There were voices down the corridor.

I thought I heard them say welcome to the Hotel.

California.

Such a lovely place Such a lovely place Such a lovely face God damn.

Is. It's our innate Caucasian need to make people of color do things for us without paying. We're horrible. But that's the only thing we've done for AI so far, is to turn all white songs into black songs.

[Brady]

How's the feel?

[Brett Vesely]

And what?

[Brady]

Okay.

[Brett Vesely]

I know how much you love Depesh Mode. Here's Enjoy the silence in a 60s Motown soul version.

[John Holmberg]

This might be better. At least it won't make me want to do heroin. Second Kahan starts singing.

I stand corrected.

[Brett Vesely]

Skipping a little bit.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Break the silence. It's already better. Come crashing in into my little world.

[Brett Vesely]

Wouldn't even know it's the same song.

[John Holmberg]

No.

Painful to me. And you know what else AI is doing? Eliminating the need for bass players, which is a fantastic thing because they're the most frustrated and annoying of musicians in the world. Oh, my little girl.

All I ever wanted wow. All I ever needed Is here in my arms. That's fantastic, too. Damn it.

[Brett Vesely]

All right. And then we'll go back to Christmas here for a minute. This is a Santa's sweatshop.

[John Holmberg]

AI, yeah. Oh, no.

There's a place of magic so it's told Tucked quietly away at the North Pole where the elves all smile and make the toys that Santa Claus will bring to the girls and boys this is nice but we're all trapped oh, there is no cheer oh, wait a minute. So please don't believe everything you hear.

Hear It's a snowy living hell that does not pay Was water boarded with hot cocoa yesterday it's from the elf's perspective. And if I don't hit my quota by the 10, he says I'll never ever see my family again. It's cold, so cold and dark, so dark every day in Santa sweatshop.

I love this. Another good thing.

[Brett Vesely]

Beth is playing that one.

[John Holmberg]

That's good.

[Brett Vesely]

And then we'll just. I know we're running out of time, so we'll just go to. We'll just go to N word or F word, the game that's sweeping the nation.

[John Holmberg]

Drew down.

[Brett Vesely]

Can you feel me?

[John Holmberg]

Pretty believe I won last week. Or I think it was me. I'll take that Is a hard R N word coming out of this album cover. That dude is mad right off the picture. So I'm gonna go hard N word.

Angry.

[Brady]

I'll go F word.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[Brett Vesely]

All right.

[John Holmberg]

Here we go, bro.

Straight on. That real. Always been real. Fifteen blocks down the street from that field, but still. See? Is that it? There it is. There it is.

I think that might have been a friendly one, though.

[Brett Vesely]

Kind of.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. We both lose today.

[Brett Vesely]

It was with an A, too.

[Brady]

Felt more warming.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it had an A on it. I was thinking he was going to go like a piece pirate. All right, well, there you go. Those are your hot releases. Who's Bro down or Drew down? Drew down. Hey, look who's back. And he's already yelling at us. Don't tell me. Time. We haven't seen you for hours. You.

[Brady]

Time.

[John Holmberg]

Where have you been? How's the cat?

Come say come. Stop. There you go, everybody. Those are your hot releases.

[Brady]

It's not weird.

[John Holmberg]

It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee. I have heard enough of this.

Morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail.

What happened here? We got Dick lasers. And we're broken now.

[Brett Vesely]

He said Kirby's gonna love this one.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Kirby is gonna. That's a stocking stuffer for your teen girl if I've ever seen one. Hey man, my dad got me a dick laser. Why?

Here you go, Kirby Derbs from pop pop to his little angel. Hey man, thanks. A dick laser. I appreciate it, man.

This one says hey Rich and John. You two can screw yourselves. Evidently. Yeah, apparently. Thanks for the shout out. We really appreciate it. Wanted to send you over our limited Release Dick Laser 2.0s as well as some OGs as a Christmas gift and a token of our appreciation. Let us know if you need anything. The dick laser dudes. Let me ask this question to you guys as Brett fires dicks into the ceiling.

You're 50 years old.

Thanks Case Brunton. But when guys who sign papers that say the dick laser guys. And the penultimate sentence in that is let us know if you need anything. What can I need from you that I don't have? When you've given me the dick laser pen for free. Yeah. Well, yeah, well, no. I mean if you're. If you've got upgrades, I'll take them, but otherwise. Hey, you know who could help us with this is the dick laser guys. Never is said.

But thank you, dick laser guys. That's awesome. Dick laser. You can get yourself one laser, five dicks, a black light and a flashlight. I love it because it's a little light pen. Sure, it's got the dick lasers on it. That's a plus. But the other side is an actual really bright flashlight and a black light and a normal laser pointer.

[Brady]

I wonder if. What? It'll look like a scorpion.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I want to find.

[Brady]

Black light. But the.

[John Holmberg]

The dicks putting dicks on scorpions before you kill them. That's just sadistic, man. I like it. You and Kirby are gonna have fun. Put a dick on a dad. You got curviders, man. I'm eyes a kite man. Anyway, kind of cool. Thank you dick laser guys. And a little housekeeping before we move on. Copper blues pre party was evidently just a horrible lie we told you guys for the last couple weeks. They have a private party there that's paying them like 60 grand. So our pre parties can't sold. There isn't one at all. So you can get to copper blues for the homework after dark. 9:45 is when the show should start. Probably closer to 10 because that never goes right. But they're going to open the doors to the club at 9:15 and you can go in the club. The pre party thing's pointless at this deal because evidently somebody read it out. Copper blues next door and you're not allowed in there. So you just go straight. Yeah. They stay. Basically said, how much is Homeburg paying? And like nothing. I thought it was a freebie that we were adding in. He goes, no, we got people that'll do that and they'll charge like 40 grand for a Christmas party. So we got booted. That's fine by me.

[Brett Vesely]

Beth rented it out. Oh great.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, tip of the cap. She's got nothing to do. It's not like she's got work in the morning. She's another one that tapes her show. Like the chat GPT game. Brutal. Anyway, what are you gonna do? So there's that. But we'll still see you Friday. Home Burger after dark still gonna happen. Videos. All the fun. The guests that we have are amazing this year. God knows what's gonna happen that night. I don't as we'll wing it and get through it. It's 1108. It's time for Brady to give you all the entertaining news he knows. It's brought to you by our [e-mail], the home of tactical Black. We talked earlier today about defending yourself from a Canadian with a snowball blower. They'd come up with a plan for that. I'm pretty sure that would be kind of easy. Although snowblowers are heavy, they're cumbersome as an attacker. So I would imagine that there's just a. An inertia situation there. That's what I would think. But you know who would know better than me? The gang up [e-mail] they take everything that they see in the news, actual events that have occurred, and they plan for it as if it's going to happen today to you. And then you go through it. Some of the stuff is weird again. I always go back to the first day. They're like, grab the machine machete, and let's train with that. And I'm like, what are the odds someone comes at you with a machete? I don't even think they still made those. Then I started to notice in the news there's like a machete attack once every couple months on the. On the light rail, just for no reason. A dude goes nuts and machete attacks. Well, now I have some training in my head for what happens with a machete. Your initial feeling with a machete attack is to put your Hands up and block the machete. Terrible, terrible idea. You got to attack the. You know what they always say? Destroy the operator. You get inside that thing and you start throwing elbows into noses. And they teach you how to do it and you're smiling while you do. It's a blast. Reactdefense.com has the price you can't beat right now. 89 for a month of training. And that's to celebrate their 25 years of doing this at the top level in the world. Reactdefense.com Be a sheepdog. Stop being a sheep. It's the home attack. Brady and Entertainment.

[Brady]

One of Will Ferrell's elf costumes sold for $319,000 at an auction that took place in the UK last Friday.

[John Holmberg]

That's pretty.

[Brady]

That was the most Christmassy movie memorabilia thing that sold a couple other items though. One of Harrison Ford's fedoras from Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom.

[Brett Vesely]

How many of those hats did he have? It seems like every, every couple years there's another fedora going.

[Brady]

$437,000 dollars. Boba Fett's blaster from the Empire Strikes Back netted $613,000.

[John Holmberg]

That's pretty good.

Melissa's mad at me and she listens all the time and I love her. So she can be mad all she wants about my littering program and she's not seeing the bigger picture here, which is I'm starting a littering program. So we all talk about the recycling program being incredibly broken. I don't want you to litter for the sake of littering. I want it to be an attention grabber. She's like, recycling is a sham. So you just want to throw your trash on the ground. It's ugly and unsanitary. Stop it. Recycling is a business and it helps a lot of people. I agree. And my plan is to make littering a business and it'll help a lot of people too. And we just shift the jobs over to the cleanup and then they can take it where it goes. It's better than the recycling thing because nobody's sorting it now in anyway. But if we have a litter pickup team that isn't prisoners, this goes a different direction. See, I'm, I'm four steps ahead of you there, Melissa.

[Brady]

Leonardo DiCaprio has been named Entertainer of the Year by Time magazine.

He had one move. It's important to disappear and get out of people's faces so they don't get sick of them.

[Brett Vesely]

He's got all that young squish around. He's probably trying.

[John Holmberg]

He has been entertaining a lot of ladies on that yacht. The environmental yacht, I believe it's called. The Thunberg is this yacht's name.

[Brett Vesely]

Yes, it's Thunberg.

[John Holmberg]

Yes, Thunberg. Wouldn't that be the ultimate? He still loves her, but he wants that yacht.

[Brady]

The digital jukebox company Touch Tones or Touch Tunes release their end of the year charts and crowned Chapel Roan as the artist of the year.

[John Holmberg]

Yuck. I don't get it.

[Brady]

Album of the year goes to Morgan Wallen's I'm the Prize Problem.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't get that.

[John Holmberg]

But see, there's the Cinnamon girl's got a future because he said the N word too, and he's fine.

[Brady]

The most played genre.

[John Holmberg]

Country rock. Is it rock? Good.

[Brady]

38 countries at 24.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding.

[Brady]

Rap, hip hop is 14. Pop 11.

[John Holmberg]

But rock falls into the category of the last 70 years, too. I mean, you got the Beatles of.

[Brady]

Rock and top five bands in the rock rock.

[John Holmberg]

It's going to be old ones.

[Brady]

AC dc, Leonard Skynyrd, Nickelback, Fleetwood Mac, Rolling Stones.

[John Holmberg]

Nickelback snuck in there and John's wearing a Fleetwood Mag shirt today. Not me, the other John Gordon. Second place play deal of the top.

[Brady]

Five rock catalog songs.

Simple Man, Leonard Skinner, Fat Bottom Girls, Queen, Rock Star Nickelback, Brown Eyed Girl, Van Morrison and Higher Creed.

[John Holmberg]

My Spotify end of the year thing came out and I'm very young. According to Spotify. They said my average, my age, if they were guessing by what I listened to, is 24. I don't know how I did that. It's because I listened to the Struts. Royal Blood a ton Dua Lipa sneaks in there now and again. I also got some Doja Cat and I liked gunna for about 10 minutes and I listened to a ton of that. But almost all the stuff I listened to on Spotify, Spotify was within the last 15 years. So they think I'm 24.

[Brett Vesely]

Do you remember what your number one played song was?

[John Holmberg]

It was Royal Blood's Typhoons and it was tied with How Did we get so Dark? Both Royal Blood. Because. Because again, Spotify is sometimes what I use when I'm biking. Oh, okay. And Bruno Mars was in there a lot too, because I went through a Bruno phase for a little bit. But the Royal Blood stuff is on a loop on my bike.

[Brady]

Mine was Celebrate Me Home.

[John Holmberg]

That was the only one, actually. Brady's Spotify spot. A Spotify profile came back and said, you are Kenny Loggin.

You're 68, Brett.

[Brady]

Top five rap hip hop catalog songs in jukebox.

[John Holmberg]

Huh?

[Brady]

According to this.

[John Holmberg]

What does that mean?

[Brett Vesely]

So probably the top five most popular.

[Brady]

Songs played.

[John Holmberg]

In a jukebox.

[Brady]

Yeah, the top. And I gave you the rock songs.

[Brett Vesely]

Nothing but a G thing.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Wait, this is a timeouts before. You keep going before in a real jukebox box. Yeah, like touch tunes or something. Okay. That's what they are. Okay. I didn't know, man.

[Brett Vesely]

G thing isn't in there.

[John Holmberg]

And it's rap.

[Brady]

That surprised me too. I thought it would be Hypnotize.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, Gin and Juice has to be on there. Not what.

[Brady]

I'll give you stuff. Eminem and Nate Dog. Oh, Bartender T. Pain and Acon in the club Fitty Broadway Girls.

[Brett Vesely]

I don't know that one.

[Brady]

Lil Durk featuring Morgan Wall.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's that new one.

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah, but that's got the country to flare to it, too. With Morgan.

[Brady]

Get it? Sexy. Sexy Red.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Sexy Red has got a big ass and bright red. She looks like Ronald McDonald if you'd nail her if Ronald McDonald had a fat ass. That's Sexy Red.

It's weird because you're looking like in every direction, and for some reason, you just kind of. Kind of want to throw around and drink a McFlurry off her back.

[Brett Vesely]

McFlurry.

[John Holmberg]

All right, we're done. Wow, that was a long one. Larry's coming up next and he's got all the info on the KUPD concert pass. And I swear to God, Brett's gonna drive to your house, knock on your door, and punch you in the nose if you email again and ask, are those pit tickets or lawn tickets that I'd be winning 60,000 of?

[Brett Vesely]

Yeah.

[Brady]

What a prick.

[John Holmberg]

What a jerk. I know you're giving me tickets to, like 30 or 40 or 50 shows for next year. Pitt or lawn. What am I doing here?

[Brady]

Not worth it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, well, then buy your tickets yourself to all those shows and you can sell the other ones.

[Brett Vesely]

Ungrateful prick.

[Brady]

That is.

[John Holmberg]

That's terrible. You don't have to go. It's free. Didn't cost you a penny. Larry's coming up next. He'll give info to all you nice people while we go out and litter all day long. Enjoy your day, everyone. We'll talk to you guys tomorrow right here in the morning sickness. Hola.

[Brady]

It's not weird.

[John Holmberg]

It's pretty cool, actually. No membership fee. I have heard enough of this.