12-12-25 - Details On Holmberg Helps Drive w/Military Assistance Mission - Entertainment Drill - FRI - Khloe Kardashian Says She Has Cobwebs In Her Vagina From Celibacy

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg’s Morning Sickness — 12-12-25

Episode Theme:
This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness balances biting humor, pop culture commentary, and local community service as the crew discusses their “Holmberg Helps” drive benefiting Arizona military families, dives into the quirks of celebrity celibacy, and showcases the team’s trademark irreverence in the daily Entertainment Drill.

---

Major Topics & Discussion Points

1. Holmberg Helps/Operation Holiday — Military Assistance Mission

• Overview:
  The team highlights their annual charity drive assisting military families in need during the holiday season, specifically partnering with the Military Assistance Mission (MAM).

• Key Points:

  • Many Arizona military families struggle financially, especially after the government shutdown, leaving them two paychecks behind.
  • The hosts urge listeners to text “GIFT” to 97936 to donate.
  • The campaign culminates with a gift distribution event at the Franciscan Renewal Center (December 20), with help from sponsors Lerner & Rowe and Amco.

• Holmberg’s Reflection:

  “My cynicism kicked in when we first started... but then you see it in action. Like wow, a lot of these military families can’t make ends meet... without this, my kids wouldn’t have Christmas.”
  (John Holmberg, 03:04)

• Notable Quote:

  “We say we support our troops and we don’t think about it unless there’s a war... help out where you can. This is a good one.”
  (John Holmberg, 06:20)

Timestamps:

• Military families segment: [02:18] – [06:32]

---

2. Entertainment Drill — Celebrity News, Pop Culture, and Playful Banter

A. Khloe Kardashian’s Celibacy

• Kickoff Quote:

  “Khloe Kardashian says she has cobwebs in her lady tunnel... because she’s been celibate for four years.”
  (Brady, 07:33)

• Playful banter ensues about how long it takes for celibacy to “restore” the Kardashians, with car restoration metaphors and warranty jokes:

  “It’s like a 64 Chevelle, but you gotta get a new interior. Four years — pretty good.”
  (John Holmberg, 08:23)

• Brett adds:

  “I’m gonna go minimum of five.”
  (Brett Vesely, 08:31)

• Memorable Moment:
  The guys riff on the concept of “throwing rocks to see how deep a well is” as a euphemism for questioning celebrity celibacy, keeping the banter fast and irreverent.

Timestamps:

• Khloe Kardashian’s celibacy: [07:33] – [09:02]

B. Grindr’s 2025 Pop Culture Awards

• Brady shares results from Grindr’s year-in-review, sparking discussion on their unique categories and winners:
  • Mother of the Year: Lady Gaga
  • Daddy of the Year: Pedro Pascal
  • Phrase of the Year: “Delulu” (short for delusional)
  • Hottest Man: Jonathan Bailey (from “Wicked”)
  • Movie of the Year: “Wicked, K Pop Demon Hunters”
• Quote:

  “Grindr has a Mother of the Year award?”
  (John Holmberg, 09:14)

• John mocks the superlatives and what they signify, e.g.:

  “Daddy of the Year is the guy with a kid they want to [bleep] the hardest — nothing to do with his skills as a parent.”
  (John Holmberg, 09:22)

Timestamps:

• Grindr awards: [09:04] – [11:18]

C. Liam Neeson’s Vaccine Controversy

• Brady reports Liam Neeson narrated an anti-vax documentary, but claims he is “pro-vaccine.”
• John parodies Neeson’s voice:

  “Imagine getting a death jab. I’m Liam Neeson for ‘Don’t do it.’... But you can if you want to. I did.”
  (John Holmberg, 12:30)

Timestamps:

• Liam Neeson segment: [11:43] – [12:41]

D. Music and Celebrity Updates

• Michael Sweet (Striper) diagnosed with cancer.

  “We can pray it away. Striper proving all worship didn’t matter.”
  (John Holmberg, 13:15)

• Roger Daltrey (The Who):
  • Knighted by Prince William.
  • John: “He looks horrible, but the man can sing like he’s 25.”
    (John Holmberg, 13:33)
  • Discussion about Daltrey’s ability to still hit the signature “scream.”
• Quick Hits:
  • Hugh Jackman jokes he “peed his pants” on stage during “Beauty and the Beast.”

Timestamps:

• Music/Celebrity news: [13:04] – [13:59]

---

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Social Media Habits:

  “Social media is a viper in your pocket. Ten years from now, when none of this is okay, they’re just gonna search your thing. ‘Oh, this guy was the king of looking at weird stuff.’”
  (John Holmberg, 01:58)

• On Irreverent Humor:

  • The team’s playful take on “restoring” a Kardashian and Grindr’s cheeky awards keeps the segment lively and edgy.
  • They riff with metaphors—car restoration, well depth, “brooms and cobwebs”—to keep the discussion memorable.

---

Key Timestamps

| Segment | Time | |-----------------------------|--------------| | Military Assistance Mission | 02:18–06:32 | | Khloe Kardashian Celibacy | 07:33–09:02 | | Grindr’s 2025 Awards | 09:04–11:18 | | Liam Neeson & Anti-Vax Doc | 11:43–12:41 | | Music & Celebrity Updates | 13:04–13:59 |

---

Tone & Style

• Language: Candid, irreverent, sometimes crude, and deeply satirical.
• Vibe: Rapid-fire banter, affectionate ribbing among colleagues, Arizona-local focus with an eye on national pop culture.
• Audience: Listeners who enjoy edgy, sometimes controversial humor mixed with genuine community engagement.

---

Summary Takeaways

• The episode is a signature blend of glib humor, topical pop culture, and sincere charity promotion—a snapshot of the show’s appeal.
• The team’s discussion on holiday giving grounds the episode in local relevance, showing genuine commitment beneath the sarcasm.
• The Entertainment Drill highlights how celebrity news and internet culture fuel joke-laden banter, while the guys never shy away from making themselves and the world the butt of the joke.

Recommended for:
Fans of comedic morning radio, Arizona locals eager to support military causes, and anyone who enjoys their news with a generous side of snark.

Transcript

[Brett Veseley]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP guns.com your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. It's Brett Veseley from Homebrew's Morning Sickness. Now, I've always been the kind of guy that takes care of my own lawn. That's until I found Divine Design Landscaping. These guys aren't your typical Mo and blow landscaping company. They do amazing work and it's just what I needed to finally throw in the towel and let the experts take over. If you've been unhappy with your landscaping or sick of trying to do it yourself, well, it's time to get a hold of Divine Design Landscaping. These guys handle everything. Lawn care, irrigation, tree work, low vol voltage lighting, 3D designs. Get a free quote at DivineDesignLawnCare.com that's DivineDesignLawnCare.com It's John Holmberg here, chilling away.

[John Holmberg]

From my friends at New Vision Autoglass. I'm telling you, I'm windshield curse. So this holiday season I'm going to add new windshield to my wish list. New Vision Auto Glass will take my call, deal with the insurance, and then we're going to discuss what the most convenient time and place is so they can come get the work done on my ride. Then I'm going to get up to $375 back. You go to newvisionautoglass.com, see what you qualify for. And don't forget that dinner at the world famous Brazilian steakhouse, Rhodesia Grill. Get that new windshield right now and Hope it lasts. 20264802109090 new vision autoglass. Proud sponsor of the Arizona Diamondbacks. Holmberg's morning sickness. The old method of treatment for a person in this condition was to throw him in jail. Thank you. God damn it. Just sent me. Oh man. I was just about to have a normal moment and then Brady just showed me a picture of a incredibly deformed human being he's been looking at. You've got a problem, man. He just flipped his phone around right as I turned the mics on and showed me a deformed woman's head. Is that progeria? What did she have? That was a lot.

[Brady]

Take a look.

[John Holmberg]

That's a lot. That's. These flashcards are no fun.

[Brady]

It's her 19th birthday.

[John Holmberg]

She's 19.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Geez Louise. Like 119. That's progeria. Show me that again.

[Brady]

Looking forward to zootopia too.

[John Holmberg]

Oh Jesus. That's severe progeria. Like Christ. Melted candle Face. What's the matter with you? Your. Your algorithms. You're going to jail. You know, these are those moments. I talk about it all the time. Social media is a viper in your pocket. Ten years from now, when none of this is okay, they're just gonna search your thing. Oh, this guy was the king of looking at weird stuff.

[Brady]

And he hit it.

[John Holmberg]

He had. No, it isn't. You don't. Pictures for this show. I want to let everybody know, while Brady's looking at all these horrible things and making stuff worse, we are still in the middle, actually, the tail end of Operation Holiday. Giving homework helps. We're helping out the military assistance mission, ma'. Am. You know that learner and Rowan Amco helped us out, so thanks to Wayne and Kevin and Glenn.

[Brady]

Margie Popeye.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Margie was here. She's in charge of the whole ma' am thing. She's great. So we're tied up with them and helping military parents provide gifts for their kids this holiday season. And the deal is, again, I've told you this. My cynicism kicked in when we first started this a few years ago. Why are we getting military people Christmas presents? I know we want to support the troops, but then you see it in action. Like, wow, a lot of these military families can't make ends meet considering the Guard or something else, they run into some trouble. And this year, especially when they had the government shutdown and they're trying to. They're two checks behind, and they're trying to get their money right and everything else, and it's just. It is unbelievable how many people show up and say, without this, my kids wouldn't have Christmas. And they're military people. It's not like they're rolling in dough. It's an amazing thing. And it's not because they're terrible with money. I'm sure in some cases that's true, but for the most part, it is a need. And I was quickly washed of my cynicism with this and said, oh, my God, this is definitely something we should do. If you want to help out, this is the way we do it. You text the word gift to. The number is 97936. Text GIFT. And an info link will go right to your phone. And then you can do whatever you need to do. Drop some money, do some shopping on that thing, help out a little bit. And then the parents. These military parents will pick out gifts for their kids December 20th at the Franciscan Renewal Center. And that's courtesy of our friends at Lerner and Row and Amco as well for helping us out with this and kicking in and putting some on top. I'm going to go there right now. You can go to 98kupd.com for all the information. I'm going to go there now and drop off my donation because I've been lacking. I've been saying I'm going to do it, saying I'm going to do it. I've been procrastinating. Today's the day I do it. Today's a big push because next week they start to really arrange all the stuff they got. So if you can help out, that would be fantastic. Gift text that to 979-369-7936 the word gift and help out if you can. We say we support our troops and we don't think about it unless there's a war or something terrible happening. But a lot of the times there's a lot of deployment we don't even know about and it makes the families back home struggle. So help out where you can. And this is a good one. The military assistance mission is awesome. So gift 97936 do it right now. We'll do the entertainment drill next. Morning sickness. Disgusting. They say things that are horrible. It's John Holmberg here showing away from my friends at New Vision Auto Glass. I recently took one of my cars to a dealership for maintenance and the guy said, oh, you got a chip in the back window. I never even noticed it. Then he told me they can fix it. I said, oh great. He said, 1300 bucks. And I started laughing. I said, no thanks. You haven't heard of New Vision Autoglass? New Vision Autoglass wants to make it easy on you too. You set up the time and the place, get the work done and it is done. So whatever Glass needs you have with your car, New Vision Auto Glass is the only place to go. Give him a call. 480-210-9090. New Vision Auto Glass, proud sponsor of the Arizona Diamondbacks. Holmberg's morning sickness Got a nice email there from a guy named Hector. Says, John, I usually don't catch myself being drawn to a lot of the comedians when they are on the air with you. It's the exception of Caliendo and Lovett's. Well, after listening to Jet Ski Johnson, I really enjoyed listening to her because she came across as a kind and fun loving person. Geez, she was real C word off here. I personally think that someone, some people feel obligated to be nice, but she seemed like a very nice and genuine person. Thanks for having her on. I'll be sure to follow her and hopefully make one of her shows soon. Hector. Well, there you go. See, she won over and that's the whole goal of this. You get one extra fan. That's one more than you didn't have before. People who didn't like you before, if they just don't like you now, nothing changed. But you got one guy who's following you now, so nice job, Jet ski. She was super sweet, very nice person. And all my Dobson buddies are texting going, yeah, Mustang. I tie nothing back. This would have happened no matter what school she went to. That's awesome. She was very sweet. It's time now for the entertainment drill that is brought to you by our [e-mail] as we creep ever so close to tonight's glorious show. You're going to be in public and react defense would be something you want to do because there's going to be a lot of drunks and goofy people at the end of this. It's late at night, Homeburg after dark. If you head downtown and you're part of it and then things go sideways, do you know what to do? Hopefully. And if you don't, well, you can. They've got a place for that. ReactDefense.com is a place for tactical black. You get out there, you learn some skills, you learn about yourself. You just get better at being you and you're wandering around the mean streets at night after a couple of pops. Darn it all, it's good to have some preparation in your pocket because you just never know what kind of lunatics looking at you. The wolves are out there. There's no reason to be a sheep. You can be a sheepdog and you do it for $89 for a month of training right now. And all you have to do is go to reactdefense.com, check their schedule, see all they have to offer and go, that's only $89. And then jump on board. Reactdefense.com has gift certificates and stuff for Christmas too. So hop on that. There you go. React defense.com it's the home of tactical black Brady entertainment.

[Brady]

Chloe Kardashian says she has cobwebs in her lady tunnel. Great because she's been celibate for four years. She adds, I don't think a man or a date or anything is going to happen anytime soon and I don't want it to. Which is interesting because she wants to.

[John Holmberg]

Grow it back together just Made headlines.

[Brady]

By responding to a high school. A hot high school teacher from Santa Cruz who put himself out there on Instagram looking for a lady saying he's.

[John Holmberg]

Got cobwebs on his wang too.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, he's like the broomstick to her cobwebs. Knock him out of that attic.

[Brady]

Maybe you already know this list, but.

[John Holmberg]

And what's the. Hold on, what's the timeline for you to visit a Kardashian vagina? How long do they have to be celibate before you're confident you won't be banging around in the hollows?

[Brady]

It's restored. It's original.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's like a. You know, it's like a 64 Chevelle, but you got to get a new interior. You know, I think four years. Pretty good.

[Brett Veseley]

I'm gonna go minimum of five.

[Brady]

Not here.

[John Holmberg]

Warranty decade. Yeah, yeah. It's like when people throw rocks to see how deep a well is.

[Brett Veseley]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

No, because you never hear anything for the longest time, like, geez, that rock is still going. There we go. I'm not getting in that.

[Brady]

90 days.

[John Holmberg]

You got a three. That's pretty confident with your dork.

[Brady]

You might know this list already, but according to Grindr, here's the.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I know it.

[Brady]

2025 Highlights of Grindr Mother of the Year was Lady Gaga.

[John Holmberg]

Grindr has a Mother of the Year award.

[Brady]

Daddy of the Year. Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

All of them.

[Brady]

Pedro Pascal, Mother in Training.

[John Holmberg]

See, but Grinder's idea of Daddy of the Year is the guy with a kid they want to the hardest has nothing to do with his skills as a parent.

[Brady]

Lady Gaga's on there numerous times. Album of the Year, Mayhem. Lady Gaga, Song of the Year.

[John Holmberg]

The Bruno Mars one.

[Brady]

Abra Cadet.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, they like that. One more gay dictionary.

[Brady]

The phrase everyone that's on everyone's lips.

[John Holmberg]

Ew.

[Brady]

Delulu.

[John Holmberg]

Go on.

[Brady]

Which is basically short for delusional.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, oh, oh. The gays only say that.

[Brady]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Hottest man of the year might be Pedro Pascal.

[Brady]

John Holmberg.

[John Holmberg]

Finally.

[Brady]

Thank you.

[John Holmberg]

Thought you're going to say. Love it.

[Brady]

Jonathan Bailey.

[John Holmberg]

Who's that? Oh, he's. He's from the Wicked movie. Yeah, the Wicked. He's the guy in Wicked. He is good looking.

[Brady]

Flyero.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know what that means. I haven't seen Wicked. I'm a straight male.

[Brady]

Movie of the year on Grindr. Wicked, K Pop Demon Hunters.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, or that. Yeah. So of course on Wicked, it's K Pop Semen Hunters.

[Brady]

Bulge of the Year, Bad Bunny, the Bony.

[John Holmberg]

They have bulbs of the year and mother of the year, the same award group.

[Brady]

Gayest fashion trend. Bloody little glasses.

[John Holmberg]

How do you have slutty glasses?

[Brady]

Not sure.

[John Holmberg]

What are slutty glasses?

[Brady]

Best beef. Cardi B versus Nicki Minaj.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that beef. I thought that was different for you, too.

[Brady]

Most bears.

[John Holmberg]

Most bears.

[Brady]

Most bears. According to 2025, where they're located.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, okay. Most bears got to be like, Northern California, Ireland. Oh, we went worldwide.

[Brady]

Highest percentage of twinks.

[Brett Veseley]

Brett down hall Palm Springs.

[Brady]

Worldwide.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, worldwide. Barcelona.

[Brady]

Ibiza.

[John Holmberg]

No, I just like saying those words, man. France. That's France. Yeah. Close, close.

[Brady]

Switzerland.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, okay. The gay French. That's who the Swiss are.

[Brady]

There's the French part of it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Even the French are like, what a bunch of queers.

[Brady]

The German part.

[John Holmberg]

No, not gay. Not twinkle. Okay. Very stout. Non gay. Look at the twinkie. French V's.

[Brady]

Liam Neeson swears he's pro vaccine despite narrating a new controversial anti vax documentary.

[John Holmberg]

I don't think anyone should get it after the documentary, but I do like vaccines. I haven't had shingles yet. Shingles is scary, but don't do it. What's the. How would you do it?

[Brady]

Plague of corruption. 80 years of pharmaceutical corruption exposed. It's this journalist, Walker Bragman.

[John Holmberg]

All right, so he did a documentary. Interviews with Robert F. Kennedy, but his incredibly recognizable voice.

[Brady]

Yes.

[John Holmberg]

Did a documentary, but I don't believe any of this. I don't believe a word of it.

[Brady]

Don't get on me.

[Brett Veseley]

Don't do it.

[John Holmberg]

Vaccine. Imagine getting a death jab. I'm Liam Neeson for Don't do it. But you can if you want to. I did.

[Brady]

I guess Hugh Jackman was joking about how he peed his pants while performing on stage. And Beauty and the Beast. Okay, he wasn't on that grinder list, but he's.

[John Holmberg]

How did I not win Father of the year, huh? Wolverine. Biggest bulge. I should be the champion of all the grinder categories, including best Mum.

[Brady]

We have sad news in the music business. Striper frontman Michael Sweet has been diagnosed with cancer.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady]

62 years old.

[John Holmberg]

We can pray it away. Striper proving all worship didn't matter.

[Brady]

Roger Daltrey got knighted by Prince William.

[John Holmberg]

Sir Roger.

[Brady]

Roger.

[John Holmberg]

All right. Did they scream there?

[Brady]

He's holding the metal.

[John Holmberg]

He looks horrible, but the man can sing like he's 25.

[Brett Veseley]

He can still pull that screen off, too.

[John Holmberg]

Oh. I mean, I watched it online. I'm like, that has to be a tape. And then he breaks it out again. And I'm like, that One didn't sound great. That was real. But it's still good. Like it was flawed. So you knew it wasn't taped because they wouldn't put a. It was awesome. He looked horrible.

[Brett Veseley]

I seen him 10 or 15 years ago when he was here and just nailed it up.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And then. Yeah, I saw him online. I'm like, there's no way this old man's gonna. And pop that. That huge screen. It was pretty cool. Anyway, well, there you go. It's 9:30. We're late. We gotta hurry up. It's time for your Guadalupe squares. If you'd like to play 585-9800. You got tickets to something?

[Brett Veseley]

Lamb of God.

[John Holmberg]

Lamb of God? Dennis Hough's favorite. Lamb of God. Dennis. We'll give you those Lamb of God tickets if you win the squares. We need a girl, we need a guy. 585-9800 is the number. We'll get Thriller in his chair and we'll play those squares next. It's 98. It's not weird. It's pretty cool actually.

[Brady]

No membership fees.

[John Holmberg]

I have heard enough of this.

[AMPM Announcer 1]

What do you think makes the perfect snack?

[AMPM Announcer 2]

Hmm, it's gotta be when I'm really craving it and it's convenient.

[AMPM Announcer 1]

Could you be more specific?

[AMPM Announcer 2]

When it's cravenient.

[John Holmberg]

Okay.

[AMPM Announcer 2]

Like a freshly baked cookie made with real butter, available right down the street at am, pm Or a savory breakfast sandwich I can grab in just a second at am, pm.

[AMPM Announcer 1]

I'm seeing a pattern here.

[AMPM Announcer 2]

Well yeah, we're talking about what I.

[AMPM Announcer 1]

Crave, which is anything from am, pm.

[AMPM Announcer 2]

What more could you want?

[AMPM Announcer 3]

Stop by AMPM where the snacks and drinks are perfectly craveable and convenient. That's cravenience. Am, pm Too much good stuff.