Holmberg’s Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 12-12-25 – Guad Squares: Tracy Morgan, Nicholson, Trump, Lovitz, Fruity Cocaine Brady, Liam Neeson, Sinatra
Date: December 12, 2025
Host & Cast: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Main Theme / Purpose

This episode centers on a holiday edition of the “Guadalupe Squares,” a comedic game resembling Hollywood Squares but with over-the-top celebrity impressions and the show’s notoriously edgy banter. The cast cycles through impressions of Tracy Morgan, Jack Nicholson, Donald Trump, John Lovitz, “Fruity Cocaine Brady,” Liam Neeson, Frank Sinatra, and more, riffing on pop culture, risqué humor, and roasting one another (and their moms). Special segments feature regular listeners as guests.

Key Discussion Points and Highlights

1. Guadalupe Squares: Characters and Banter (02:29–15:24)

• Classic Square Introductions and Character Bits:
  • Each square features a wild impersonation, including Tracy Morgan, Trump, Jack Nicholson, Lovitz, a coked-up Brady, Liam Neeson, Ted Nugent, Frank Sinatra, and the "Lord and Savior Tripp Reef."
  • Heavy emphasis on sexually charged jokes, absurd personal stories, and mock insults, mainly targeting hosts' mothers and one another.
• Memorable Quotes:
  • Tracy Morgan boasts, “I was named square of the year ... Your mother said I was always trying to stuff this giant thing inside of us. Like putting a round thing in the square hole.” (02:54)
  • Trump reflects on his past: “They released pictures from Epstein’s party this morning ... I used to have a Trump line of condoms ... had my face on them, and it said, 'I’m huge.'” (04:39)
  • Brady as “Fruity Cocaine Brady” proclaims: “Mrs. found out cocaine's got a fruity flavor ... Now we’re doing cocaine that tastes like Fruity Pebbles.” (07:43)
  • Liam Neeson, deadpan: "I just did a documentary about Hitler ... I don't believe in it. It's called 'Joyous Days of Adolf,' and I'm the narrator because I'm so good at it." (09:45)

2. Game Play with Listeners (15:24–23:32)

• Callers Amy and Zach Savage play the Squares trivia game, picking their favorite “celebrity” impersonators for a chance to win Lamb of God tickets.
• Ample jokes about Amy dating a blind man (and the supposed perks involved).
  • Amy admits, “I don’t shave my legs” and the show fires back: “Well, he can feel. Still. Geez, hands work.” (16:00)
• Sample Trivia Question Exchanges:
  • “The oldest yo mama joke dates back to 1500s Germany. True or false?” (16:48)
  • “Does Ferrari deny 99% of people who apply to buy one of their vehicles?” (20:17)
  • “Is Spielberg second only to God in mentions during Oscar acceptance speeches?” (21:38)

3. Riffs on Listener & Celebrity Names

• The cast invents raunchy, pun-laden Asian names (e.g., “Chin Load,” “Siwu Gulp,” “Lou Say Noose”) and spiral into crass, politically incorrect humor, feigning offense and amusement.
• Sinatra, in his square, croons that even in death he’s “scoring more s than Larry,” takes shots at Cory’s mom, and introduces the term “chin load.” (15:11, 19:22)
• Memorable Quote:
  • Sinatra: “I banged a Chinese chick with that name once. Her name was Chin Load.” (19:25)

4. Homeburg After Dark & Show Plugs (24:00–25:38)

• Hype for the sold-out “Holmberg After Dark” event, banter about regular listeners, and jokes about the current “Listener of the Year” being deaf, prompting more self-deprecating gags.
• Final short riffs on women’s college basketball, Penn State’s “Flabby Grandma Arms,” and wrapping up the morning show.

Notable Quotes & Moments (With Timestamps)

• Tracy Morgan on His “Square of the Year” Award:
  “I was named square of the year ... your mother said I was always trying to stuff this giant thing inside of us.” – Tracy Morgan (02:54)

• Donald Trump Reminisces About Custom Condoms:
  “I had condoms. I used to have condoms all the time. They were a Trump line of condoms ... It had my face on them and it said, ‘I’m huge.’” – Trump (04:39)

• Fruity Cocaine Brady’s Revelations:
  “Now we’re doing cocaine that tastes like Fruity Pebbles ... Best reunion I’ve ever been a part of.” – Cocaine Brady (07:43)

• Liam Neeson Pokes Fun at Narrating Absurd Documentaries:
  “I just did a documentary about Hitler ... I don’t believe in it. Called ‘Joyous Days of Adolf,’ and I’m the narrator because I’m so good at it.” – Liam Neeson (09:45)

• Frank Sinatra’s Signature Crassness:
  “You got a song for me over there? ... I want to sing a tune to you guys ... I think you twinks would love something like that.” – Sinatra (12:00) “I banged a Chinese chick with that name once. Her name was Chin Load.” – Sinatra (19:25)

• Jokes About Listener Amy’s Blind Partner:
  “What base are you guys on? ... You don't even do your hair, do you?” (15:48) Amy: “I don't shave my legs.”
  Holmberg: “Well, he can feel. Still. Geez, hands work.” (16:00)

• Listener Game Play:

  • “The oldest yo mama joke dates back to 1500s Germany. True or false?” – Corey (16:48)
  • “Does Ferrari deny 99% of people who apply to buy one of their vehicles?” – Corey to Sinatra (20:17)
  • “Is Spielberg second only to God in mentions during Oscar acceptance speeches?” – Corey to Nicholson (21:38)

Timestamped Segment Guide

• [02:29]–[15:24]: Guadalupe Squares Introductions and Banter (celebrity impressions, raunchy character bits)
• [15:24]–[23:32]: Listener Game Play (Amy and Zach participate)
• [23:32]–[23:42]: Winners & Listener Farewell
• [24:00]–[25:38]: Show Plugs, Event Hype, Loose Wrap-Up

Tone & Style

• No-holds-barred, irreverent, heavily reliant on edgy, adult humor and rapid-fire banter.
• Frequent use of impression comedy with running jokes (e.g., "your mom" gags, cocaine, celebrity scandals).
• Self-aware and self-deprecating, with the cast riffing on their own humor’s abrasiveness and aging pop culture references.
• Loud, chaotic, and playful, perfect for fans of shock-jock-style radio.

Final Thoughts

This episode is classic Holmberg’s Morning Sickness: wild, offensive, and fast-paced. The hosts push boundaries with impersonations, off-the-wall scenarios, and games—making for a raucous ride that regular listeners expect. If you can handle the wild energy and dark humor, it’s a hilarious holiday episode not to miss.