Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode Summary - December 16, 2025
Main Theme:
This episode is a classic blend of irreverent humor, social taboo-busting, and the crew's take on oddball life scenarios — ranging from an unexpectedly practical discussion on switching your “wiping hand” ahead of surgery, to a wild, unfiltered riff on nervousness around names with notorious historical baggage after an Uber Eats delivery by someone named Saddam.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Great Wiping Hand Debate: Preparing for Surgery

• Listener Email:
  A listener, Steve, wrote in, inspired by a previous discussion, to thank the show for preparing him for post-surgery challenges — specifically, the need to use the non-dominant hand to wipe after bathroom trips post-shoulder surgery.

  • “Listening to you guys makes my life better. ...I’m having my right shoulder fixed next week… Reminded me to start practicing to clean my ass with my offhand. It took some time, but I’m getting pretty good at it.” (04:27)

• Hosts’ Experiences:
  The gang shares both sympathy and comedic commiseration:

  • “Go try practice that today just for fun. In case you get your arm lopped off. Try it!” – John (05:18)
  • “It’s like I’m cheating on my ass.” – Brett (05:38)
  • They describe the initial clumsiness, accidental messes, and why becoming “ambidextrous” in bathroom matters is underrated.
  • “Your hand is like a blind man in the dark trying to clean a room he’s never been in before.” – Byron (06:34)

• Cultural Twist:
  The crew dives into how left vs right hand usage is significant in other cultures, especially in the Middle East, where:

  • Punishment for theft traditionally involves chopping off the left ("wiping") hand, adding social humiliation to physical loss.
  • Anecdotes about students from the Middle East keeping the “no left-hand handshake” tradition alive, and the unique bathroom logistics (like “the kettle”).

2. Nervous Names: Saddam Delivers Your Pizza

• The Story:
  During a Steelers game gathering, a pizza delivery arrived with a notification that “Saddam” was bringing their order, sparking anxiety and gallows humor all around.

  • “The third pizza’s being delivered by someone named Saddam. I don’t want it. I don’t think I… My brain immediately went bigot.” – Megan (11:27)
  • Two Saddams arrived, which only amplified the group’s nervous jokes.

• Social Reactions to Notorious Names:
  The group riffs on the discomfort and morbid comedy of encountering names like Saddam, Adolf, or Osama in everyday life.

  • “If someone named bin Laden was delivering your pizza, you’d be like—like, you just—you held on to the name Saddam. Adolf can’t deliver my pizza either.” – Byron (12:34)
  • “Saddam, the name… It’s over. That’s over. You can’t be named Saddam anymore.” – Byron (14:38)
  • The hosts discuss how names are “ruined” by history—citing Adolf post-Hitler, and OJ or Orenthal post-Simpson.
  • “You just can’t. Like, those are standout names… That’s dead in America forever and should be.” – Byron (26:57)

3. Comedic Sidebars & Memorable Moments

• Frankenstein Shadow Story:
  Byron recounts the hilarious image of party guest Dale’s silhouette on his frosted glass door:

  • “It’s Frankenstein. His head is completely square. He’s taking up from the top of the door down. It’s horrifying.” (09:13)

• Imagined “Saddam’s Pizza Palace”:
  The hosts riff on what would happen if Saddam opened a pizza place.

  • “Welcome to Saddam’s Pizza Palace! Can I help you? Our pizzas are the bomb.” – Byron (28:10)
  • Details like cave tables, only goat toppings, and all the cultural stereotypes get the satirical treatment.

• “Muhammad Pie”:
  The running joke continues about opening a Middle Eastern pizza shop, riffing on stereotypes and dietary restrictions.

  • “What toppings do you have?” — “Goat. You have goat? Goat and pineapple.” (31:33)

• Parodying Media Gimmicks:
  Poking fun at radio contests that try to “boost numbers” by appealing to certain demographics, joking about magic carpet giveaways and targeting the show to "Saddams".

  • “How about we give away magic carpets?” – Brett (18:05)
  • “Morning, Saddams! Anybody? Saddam out there? You just got yourself some Korn tickets.” – Byron (18:45)

Notable Quotes & Standout Moments

• On practicing non-dominant wiping:

  • “It’s like baseball. You’ll be more valuable if you can switch hit.” – Brett (06:08)
  • “Your hand is like a blind man in the dark trying to clean a room he’s never been in before.” – Byron (06:34)

• On Saddam as a pizza driver:

  • “Saddam, your pizza’s being delivered by Saddam. …And I’m looking for tape on the pizza box. It’s not there.” – Byron (12:34)
  • “You can’t be named Saddam anymore. I don’t care what it means in Arabic. …Just switch over to John or just Muhammad like everybody else!” – Byron (14:36)

• On ruined names:

  • “Hitler ruined the mustache from the second he had it. Charlie Chaplin started it… the second Hitler did it, it stopped being a thing forever.” – Byron (14:08)
  • “You just can’t. Like, those are standout names… That’s dead in America forever and should be.” – Byron (26:57)

• On name-driven nervousness:

  • “So are you more scared of Saddam coming to the door or Dale? 100 percent—Saddam.” (34:33)

Timestamps for Key Segments

• The Wiping Hand and Surgery Advice: 04:27 – 08:51
• Frankenstein Shadow Party Story: 09:01 – 10:22
• Saddam the Pizza Driver & Nervous Names: 11:21 – 18:50
• Riffs on Other Taboo Names & Social Commentary: 20:08 – 28:08
• Imagined “Saddam’s Pizza Palace,” Muhammad Pie Jokes: 28:10 – 34:46

Final Thoughts

The episode swings from the genuinely practical — prepping for post-surgery hygiene — to biting, irreverent humor about cultural taboos and the legacy of infamous names, all with the HMS crew’s signature, unfiltered banter. They leave listeners with equal doses of laughter, discomfort, and a strangely useful reminder: Practice with your non-dominant hand because you never know. Also, maybe think twice about your baby name list.