Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness – Arizona

Episode: 12-16-25 – “We're Jealous Of Howard Stern's Latest Contract – Devin Has Emailed Over This Year's List Of Band Names From The Show – Donovan Has Emailed List Of First Things He Heard This Year”
Date: December 16, 2025
Hosts: John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo

Overview

This episode features the crew expressing amused envy over Howard Stern's lucrative new contract, which grants him summers off and a reduced, three-day workweek. True to form, they riff irreverently on the concept of taking entire seasons off, peppering the discussion with jokes, character bits, and even imaginary contract negotiations.
The annual tradition continues as listener Devin shares the 2025 master-list of ridiculous, out-of-context "band names" called out on the show throughout the year. Another listener, Donovan, offers a compilation of the wildest first lines he heard after tuning in each morning, highlighting the unpredictable madness of the show.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Howard Stern’s New Contract and Jealousy

• Jealous of Stern’s Schedule: John opens the show remarking on Howard Stern’s unprecedented contract—hundreds of millions plus three-day workweeks and the entire summer off.
  • John: “I'm jealous right now. I'm trying to fight it. Howard Stern just signed his new contract...hundreds of millions...and part of it is summer's off. He only works three days a week.” (05:30)
  • The crew riffs on possible new work schedules, tongue-in-cheek, imagining taking entire seasons off and riffing with alternate personas (Red Robin, Brettle Juice, Baba Bastard, referencing Stern's show).
  • John: “I didn't know that was an option. I didn't even ask. I think maybe not working all summer is a great idea.” (06:00)
  • They mock-negotiate, with John positing: “Why doesn’t anybody take spring off? Let's take spring off.” (07:00)
• Stern’s Justification for Summers Off: The hosts laugh at Stern’s explanation that “kids are out of school”—but note his audience isn’t kids, it’s adults.
  • John: “...no kids listening to his show. Everyone who listens to his show is working.” (08:00)
  • Imagining replacing summers with any other season; discuss Brady’s recent kidney surgery and joke he should have had a season off (“Brady had a kidney removed. He only missed four days. I mean, come on, he should have at least had a season off.” – 10:05)
  • Quote: “The show's better than ever. I just don't want to work three or four months a year in a row.” – John (11:30)

2. Annual Band Name List – Listener Devin’s Compilation

• The Tradition: Devin Reek, a regular listener, chronicles every time the hosts say, “That’s a good band name,” producing a hilarious, often bizarre list each year. They read entries from 2025, giving context and laughing at the origins.
  • First Band Name of 2025: “Double Gypsy Butthole,” the result of a story about a woman and baby at the Outback. (13:45)
  • Notable entries include:
    • “Ladle Oporta John”
    • “Digital Mexican”
    • “Gutter Pie”
    • “Buffy Has Shingles”
    • “Walking, Tranny Rape”
    • “Moisten the Dolphin”
    • “Dude, Soup in a Meat Tube” (19:00)
    • “Corpse Cloud”
    • “Clam Drippings”
    • “Zombie Bullhorn”
    • “Vag Bay”
  • The context for each ranges from darkly absurd to outright disgusting, often relating to anecdotal stories or newsbits.
  • Brady: “Damp Granny. I'm going to circle. That's my favorite. I want a concert shirt of that.” (22:40)
  • The hosts playfully debate their favorites, with “Double Gypsy Butthole,” “Gutter Pie,” “Moisten the Dolphin,” and “Damp Granny” getting high marks.

3. In-Studio Contract “Negotiation”

• Trip Reeb Drops In: KUPD’s GM, Trip Reeb, pops by and gets roped into the seasonal time-off negotiation joke. The crew probes for the possibility of taking an entire season off, invoking the names of musical guests and filling hosts.
  • John: “If I got Mungo Jerry to fill in for Winters, can we have Winters off?” (24:30)
  • Trip: “When you are 71, you'll still be here, right? You can take all the seasons of whatever season you want off.” (25:15)

4. Donovan’s “First Things Heard” Game

• Listener List: Donovan tracks the first phrase he hears, at random, whenever he tunes in, resulting in a list of wild, out-of-context quotes that showcase the madness and unpredictability:
  • Examples:
    • “I’d eat the Crunch Berries out of that ass.” (34:00)
    • “If a Mexican charges at you, you can poke him with a shovel.”
    • “I would drink snake semen.”
    • “Nothing cooler than mother and daughter in their sexy underpants.”
    • “Cancer is like my dick. Hand jobs change friendships.” (38:20)
    • “If your dad was in the room, you’d keep your thumb out of your ass. And that’s my stance on religion.” (40:00)
• The group laughs, cringes, and tries to recall the context for each, usually failing, which makes it even funnier.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

Jealousy Over Howard Stern’s Contract

• John: “Being jealous doesn't stop anything that's going to happen, and it doesn't make something happen. It is a wasted reaction. I won't even call it an emotion, but I'm jealous right now.” (01:20)
• On Summer Off: “I didn't even think about that. I almost said something like, can we have December off? And we already get a lot of it off. But summer, you can do that. You can just stop...” – John (08:40)

Band Names Hall of Fame

• Brady: “I want a concert shirt of that — Damp Granny.” (22:40)
• John: “Dead Gene and the Dogs is solid. Yeah. Gore Orphanage, Dude. Soup in a meat tube is pretty good.” (27:10)

Out-of-context Gold (Donovan’s Game)

• Brady: “You’d fart on that cake, Brady.”
• John: “That’s the only way I’ll eat community food, is if you raped me.”
• Bret: “You can trust people with terminal... You can't trust people with terminal cancer. Well, I... That's actually like a fortune cookie.” (39:00)
• John: “If your dad was in the room, you'd keep your thumb out of your ass. And that's my stance on religion.” (40:00)

Timestamps for Important Segments

• 05:30 – John opens up discussion about Howard Stern’s new contract and envy
• 13:45 – Start of 2025 band names list (“Double Gypsy Butthole” origin story)
• 22:40 – Debating favorite band names (“Damp Granny”)
• 24:30 – Mock contract negotiation with Trip Reeb about taking a season off
• 27:10 – Wrapping up the band names of 2025
• 34:00 – Donovan’s “First Thing I Heard” quotes begin
• 38:20 – Hilariously inappropriate and odd quotes (“Cancer is like my dick. Hand jobs change friendships.”)
• 40:00 – Peak non sequiturs and discussion about religious rationale and bodily habits

Tone & Style

• Language: Playfully crude, irreverent, quick-witted, and rooted in shock-jock humor.
• Atmosphere: Laugh-heavy, rapid-fire banter, inside jokes, some callbacks to past shows.
• Dynamic: Hosts feed off each other’s energy, often escalating jokes or doubling-down on awkward or politically incorrect comments. Listener participation (via Devin and Donovan) adds meta humor and tradition.

Conclusion

This HMS episode is a rollicking end-of-year romp—a comedic, unfiltered look back at a year of outrageous on-air moments, seen through running bits like the "band name" tradition and random, contextless one-liners. The crew's faux-jealous meltdowns over Howard Stern's contract are played for maximum laughs, leading into the organized chaos that is their annual band-name list with equally absurd remark round-ups.
If you love Howard Stern-style irreverence, meta-humor, and long-running in-jokes, this is a can't-miss burst of insanity from Arizona's #1 morning show.