12-24-25 - The Story Of The Baby Funeral Brady Attended - Stephen Hawking Was On The Epstein List - Dec/Jan 2024 - BO

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: 12-24-25 - The Story Of The Baby Funeral Brady Attended - Stephen Hawking Was On The Epstein List
Date: December 24, 2025
Host: John Holmberg with Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo

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Episode Overview

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness is a provocative holiday edition, mixing dark humor with unsettling real-life stories and pop culture controversy. The hosts candidly discuss the emotional complexity and uncomfortable humor surrounding baby funerals, segueing into a satirical breakdown of the revelation that Stephen Hawking appeared on Jeffrey Epstein’s infamous guest list, all while maintaining their irreverent, boundary-pushing comedic tone.

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Attending a Baby Funeral: Gallows Humor and Coping with the Unthinkable

[01:07–12:13]

• First Experience in a Suit on a Tuesday:
  Holmberg opens by reflecting on the strange feelings of wearing a suit on a Tuesday, associating it with attending a funeral, which leads to the topic of attending a baby’s funeral.

  • “I've never been in a suit on a Tuesday...First time in a suit on a Tuesday.” (John Holmberg, 01:07)

• Reflecting on the Baby Funeral:
  Byron shares an experience of attending a baby wake with somber but comedic undertones, describing the overwhelming discomfort and inability to lighten the mood. The hosts riff on the awkwardness and emotional pain, using food-related dark humor:

  • “You see that little tiny shoe box...somebody's gotta make that, and you gotta shop for it.” (John Holmberg, 02:44)
  • “Pass the barbecue sauce. Everything's little smokies and baby back ribs.” (Holmberg/Byron, 04:26)

• Questioning the Purpose of Mourning Rituals for Infants:
  Holmberg ponders the societal need for funerals at that age, grappling with what—if anything—can be said at such gatherings.

  • “There's nothing that will lighten the mood at a baby funeral.” (Holmberg, 02:34)
  • “What do you say at a baby funeral?...You got time, yeah. Good news is you didn't get too close." (Holmberg, 03:24)

• Dark Satire on Catering for Such Events:
  The hosts take the bleak subject into an extended riff about menu choices (baby carrots, goldfish, Cheerios) and how nothing could possibly “fit.”

  • “Do you want the vegetables to match the deceased? These are all little baby corn, baby carrots.” (Holmberg, 05:05)
  • “Just a bowl of goldfish and like all the things he loved. Bowl of Cheerios...That's what he would have wanted.” (Holmberg, 05:21)

• Supporting Grieving Families & The Futility of Comfort:
  The group questions whether such events bring genuine comfort to parents and discuss how, for adults, showing up is a gesture, but for baby funerals, few words or actions help.

  • “You’re not really giving support at a baby funeral…The parents didn’t remember who was there. They’re in a fog.” (Holmberg, 09:42–09:58)
  • “He was a young kid. Yeah it was a baby. That’s different. Babies are different. That’s just awful.” (Holmberg, 10:54)

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2. Societal and Religious Perspectives on Infant Loss

[08:03–09:15]

• Historical Context – Babies Not Counted in the Census:
  Holmberg and Byron discuss how in biblical times, infants under a certain age weren't even counted, reflecting on the frequent reality of child loss in history.
  • “The Bible wasn’t wrong...they didn’t count babies for the first year…they weren’t counted as population for a while.” (Holmberg, 08:10)
  • “Anything under two years old...take it out...It wasn’t people yet.” (Byron/Holmberg, 08:49–08:59)

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3. Shift to Pop Culture Controversy: Stephen Hawking on Epstein’s List

[13:46–23:42]

• Public Shock at Hawking’s Name on the Epstein Logs:
  The conversation veers into news that Stephen Hawking’s name appears on court documents among guests at Jeffrey Epstein’s island.

  • "All this Epstein talk all week long...Stephen Hawking's name popped up on there and everybody kind of went, what?" (Holmberg, 13:46)

• Satirical Speculation and Absurdism:
  Holmberg and Byron lampoon the image of Hawking at a debauched party, juxtaposing his disability and intellectual status with the setting’s notorious reputation.

  • “If you’re 16 and you’re, you know, on the island and you’ve been sex trafficked, the one person you don’t have to worry about is Stephen Hawking, right?” (Holmberg, 16:22)
  • “He rolled up against me and I couldn’t move. They’ve got the emergency brake on.” (Byron/Holmberg, 17:07)

• Discussion on Reputation, Guilt, and Public Perception:
  They reflect on how mere association stains reputations, but public interpretation varies by the person.

  • “All the names that are on this list...then you start to wonder, was Stephen Hawking, like, a sex slave?...But he was down there with Epstein.” (Holmberg, 17:45)

• Critique of Those Who Deny Involvement Despite Evidence:
  Referencing Prince Andrew, they mock those caught in contradiction.

  • “That may or may not be my arm. The angle on this photograph, I don’t even know if we’re actually standing next to each other.” (Holmberg parodying Prince Andrew, 18:25)

• Positioning Hawking as a Complex Figure:
  The hosts paint Hawking as a man with a dark side—humorous speculation about his unconventional romantic history and supposed eccentricities.

  • “Stephen Hawking had a wife and a second. And there’s dudes out there on Bumble going, I just can’t make it work.” (Holmberg, 22:42)
  • “It’s how you wheel yourself around…it’s like, how high end is your wheelchair?” (Byron/Holmberg, 22:44–22:46)

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• Gallows Humor on Food at a Baby Funeral:
  “Pass the barbecue sauce. Everything’s little smokies and baby back ribs.”
  — John Holmberg and Byron (04:26)

• On the Social Utility of Mourning Rituals:
  “You’re not really giving support at a baby funeral…The parents didn’t remember who was there. They’re in a fog.”
  — John Holmberg (09:42–09:58)

• Satirical Outlook on Historical Infant Mortality:
  “The Bible wasn’t wrong…they didn’t count babies for the first year…”
  — John Holmberg (08:10)

• Public Perception of Hawking’s Appearance at Epstein Island:
  “The one person you don't have to worry about is Stephen Hawking, right?...If he rolls into the massage room, you're just giving a massage.”
  — John Holmberg (16:22)

• Mocking Prince Andrew’s Denials:
  “That may or may not be my arm. The angle on this photograph, I don't even know if we're actually standing next to each other.”
  — John Holmberg (18:25)

• On Hawking’s Surprising Romance:
  “Stephen Hawking had a wife and a second. And there’s dudes out there on Bumble going, I just can’t make it work. And that’s just more and more proof that it’s about what you are, not who you are.”
  — John Holmberg (22:42)

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Timestamps for Important Segments

• Opening & Funeral Attire on a Tuesday: 01:07–02:12
• Baby Funeral and Gallows Humor: 02:12–06:45
• Discussion on Societal Rituals, Comfort, and Role of Funerals: 06:45–11:49
• Historical Context/Biblical Census: 08:03–09:15
• Transition to Baby Funeral Support vs. Adult Funerals: 09:34–12:13
• Stephen Hawking on Epstein Island & Related Satire: 13:46–23:42
• Reflecting on Reputations, Guilt, and Modern Scandals: 17:45–21:58
• Absurd Speculation about Hawking’s Personal Life: 22:44–23:42

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Tone and Style

The episode is driven by irreverent, dark humor and unfiltered banter, striking a (sometimes uncomfortable) balance between comic relief in the face of tragedy, and sardonic critique of public scandals. The hosts embrace taboo, using shock value as a means to discuss topics many people avoid.

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Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg’s Morning Sickness exemplifies the show’s brand of confronting heavy, sometimes taboo social topics with unrestrained banter, self-aware satire, and a willingness to offend for the sake of comedic exploration and candor. Whether riffing on the raw awkwardness of baby funerals or lampooning the bizarre intersection of genius, celebrity, and scandal, the hosts keep listeners laughing—and squirming—right through the holidays.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

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[Byron]

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[John Holmberg]

Putting the fu back in funny Homburg's Morning Sickness 98 KUPD on a Tuesday. I've never, I don't think I've ever been a suit on a Tuesday in my life. I have to. There's no possible way that might, that might have been the first time ever I'm in a suit on a Tuesday. I'm trying to think of any other reason for I've never been to a Tuesday funeral, never been to a Tuesday wedding. I have never been in a suit.

[Byron]

On a Tuesday wedding. I've been to a Tuesday funeral.

[John Holmberg]

You think, well, it was awake and.

[Byron]

Then the funeral was the next day.

[John Holmberg]

You remember Tuesday Wednesdays. That's interesting. I don't think I've ever been to a Tuesday anything. First time in a suit on a Tuesday. Nothing wrong with that. But here we are end of the year, got an email like this because, you know, we don't know what's going on here in this building.

[Byron]

In fact, that Tuesday wake or memorial was that one where it was the baby and I walked into the wake and it was Bone Thugs, Harmony Crossroads.

[John Holmberg]

Was crying out loud. Did you go to Tupac's wake or what is it? Went to a baby wake. Oh, that's the worst of all. I. I couldn't go to a baby funeral. What do you think about? You think about. You didn't even know him.

[Byron]

You don't have any funny story.

[John Holmberg]

There's no, there's nothing that will lighten the mood at a baby funeral. See that Little tiny shoe box.

[Byron]

Oh. Oh, it was. It was all there.

[John Holmberg]

Shovel in the back. I know. The baby caskets. Somebody's got to make that. And you gotta shop for it. I wouldn't even want to be at the store. Hi. Little caskets. Yeah, we need one. I'm sorry. How big was it? Not very. Do you have one that's about the size of. I don't know, size 14? Nike. Yeah, we got two or three of those left over. We can Air Jordan. Build one of them. 5. They just spray paint the side of the Jordan. Terrible. But I couldn't go to a baby funeral. I wouldn't. I wouldn't go. I'm not. No way.

[Byron]

Definitely the toughest.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, it's.

[Byron]

There's nothing.

[John Holmberg]

You can. Why have a funeral? Why? Yeah, you can't say a thing.

[Byron]

You can do another one.

[John Holmberg]

He lived a full life. He lived a nice life. What do you tell the person? Try again. I don't even. Yeah, yeah. You got time. Yeah, yeah. Good news is you didn't get too close. At least he wasn't talking yet. You don't even know if he was nice. He might have been an. I mean, what do you say at a baby funeral? There's no proper. There's no proper terminology. To wander into a baby funeral and start and say, oh, you know, until Brady said that perfect thing, I was distraught. You can't. There's no getting back around other person's change forever. I wouldn't have gone to that. I'd have skipped that. Did they have food? Oh, Brad. No, they didn't have food.

[Byron]

No, it was just. Well, they did over at the house. I didn't go over the house.

[John Holmberg]

So you were. So they had a get together after family. Now, that's something you just kind of have privately. You don't invite people? No, no, no, no, no. I couldn't do it. How did you.

[Byron]

I had a plate of baby back ribs.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Byron]

Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

Pass the barbecue sauce. Everything's little smokies and baby background.

[Byron]

Burnt ends?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, just the chunks of other things.

[Byron]

Good veal.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, the veal's fantastic. Real tender. I don't think this thing ever saw the light of day. Oops. Gotta go. I gotta go. One more for the road, though. Yeah. I don't even know. Some riblets. I couldn't do it. Everything's tiny. That's horrible. How do you even kill? Hi. Caterer got a. We're interested in a caterer.

[Byron]

Okay.

[John Holmberg]

What's the event? Baby funeral. Okay.

[Byron]

We've got just the menu.

[John Holmberg]

We've got a specific menu of that for the vegans. We have some baby carrots over here. And do you want the vegetables to match the deceased, the decedent? These are all little baby corn. Baby carrots.

[Byron]

What about the sprouts?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, man.

[Byron]

How come the food's so little?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, right. It's a little menu. There's a hell. We're all gonna be there. Yeah. There's just a bowl of goldfish and like all the things he loved. Bowl of Cheerios. Cheerios all over, and they're just on the floor. That's the way he would have wanted it. He would have wanted it this way. I guess that's the only thing to do at a baby food was bring your own bag of Cheerios and just leave them on their floor and stomp them into the carpet. That's what he would have wanted.

[Byron]

Worn out sippy cups.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Did they have alcohol or they have drinks? They had to have drinks.

[Byron]

I don't remember.

[John Holmberg]

Man, I'd have gotten in and out of that in a heartbeat. Just like that kid. I'd have been in and out real fast. Oh, that's terrible. See, we can make fun of a baby funeral. That's how fun this show is. We can take a dead infant and have a good old time.

[Byron]

Oh, my God.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I. And there's the danger is that there I am with dumbass over here. If I go to a baby funeral, probably because he's taken me, because other than otherwise, I'm not nice enough to do it. You gotta be nice. And then the next thing you know, we're looking at each other going, baby carrots, huh? That's what he would have wanted, was everything pureed. Do you have any milk left? I'm sure you're not using all of it. What are you gonna do with the rest?

[Byron]

Those are the jello molds.

[John Holmberg]

What are you gonna do? Product. Are you gonna squirt that out and give it to a one of the survivors or baby food? No way. That shouldn't even be allowed. No offense to the people who have babies who go. Because I can't imagine that kind of mess. But, I mean, don't say, hey, big, big service. I'm like, what was his name? I met him once. He owes me money. I'm not going to that. I'll support you in other ways. There's no way I'll be your best friend forever. But I don't think it's a good idea to have a get together. How many people were there?

[Byron]

Was it big 75, probably. Oh, it was a small little chapel on the funeral home. That's huge. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

That kid didn't even meet 75 people. No way.

[Byron]

You know, most was there to. Did people support him? No.

[John Holmberg]

I remember the first time I heard him crying.

[Byron]

One of the babies.

[John Holmberg]

And the last time, and there was an awkward silence and I left. Oh, my God. Yeah. That's no fun at all. Anyway, well, Merry Christmas, everybody. Thanks for that uplifting masquerade.

[Byron]

It was a Tuesday.

[John Holmberg]

It was a Tuesday afternoon. We'll have it on a Tuesday tonight. Make it more memorable.

[Byron]

You'll never forget.

[John Holmberg]

Yikes. No way. Well, there's stuff. There's those. Man, I would never forget that. And that probably changes you as the funeral goer, because you have that thing of, like, don't post your pregnancy on Facebook. I've always thought that that's. Don't do it. You got two years. Get through the gauntlet. And then once you're through the crucible, it's like, you know, the Bible wasn't wrong. When they did their census, they didn't count babies for the first year, because back then, they're like, these things don't make it too often. So they weren't counted as population for a while. They had a census back then. Oh, yeah, they do. That's in the book.

[Byron]

The clipboard.

[John Holmberg]

It's in the book they started. Women counted for nothing. They were property. They have a lot figured out a lot of, you know, look, I'm against religion, but that Bible's got a few good ideas. America, great again. The ladies are chattel, which is a great word.

[Byron]

There's even an edict put forth to take care of the population a little bit. Anything under 2 years old that's a male.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Byron]

Take it out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And it didn't count. It wasn't. It wasn't people yet. So even the people who argue that abortion needs to be a thing, you can look at your book, and they didn't even count it as people for a couple years originally. Things. Times have changed. I'm with you on the adapting part.

[Byron]

But, gang, we think we're within two years of the birth of this baby.

[John Holmberg]

I think you made it. Well, after two years, if you were still breathing, if you started walking, they're like, all right, put them down as a person, because he made it. But boy, oh, boy. Yeah. I don't. Baby funeral's got me spinning. I'm not interested in that. But other than that, would you go to another baby funeral if somebody said it? You'd go.

[Byron]

How well I know the person depends on the spread.

[John Holmberg]

Man. I would be more one on one.

[Byron]

More about the support.

[John Holmberg]

No, I know what it's about. But it's not though. Because nobody's comfortable. It's not. You're not really giving support at a baby funeral. You're not doing a thing. And I guarantee you the parents of the lost baby didn't remember who was at the funeral at all. They're in a fog.

[Byron]

Yeah. But you know, at the time, you know, being experienced, being on both sides, even though it's not a baby, like at my dad's funeral, that's. You appreciate.

[John Holmberg]

That's a celebration of an actual. Of course. Because you had accepted the death.

[Byron]

No matter what. I've been to a horrible death or whatever. It's still.

[John Holmberg]

Sure, sure.

[Byron]

You might not even after the fact that it's like your wedding or whatever. Again, that's a celebration.

[John Holmberg]

But baby funerals different.

[Byron]

The fact that they're showing up, it helps.

[John Holmberg]

It's not a general feel. I don't know. I don't know that it does. I don't know. Their baby funeral is like. Well, that was soothing. I'm glad we did that. I don't think that happened there to, you know.

[Byron]

Hey, I. I don't have the right words to say to you about everything. Just the fact that.

[John Holmberg]

Did you avoid the family?

[Byron]

No, I would have just.

[John Holmberg]

I would have just. Sorry about all this. I don't. You don't want to confront those kind of things. Yeah. A kid, an older kid, stuff like that. You start getting like, oh, geez, they need things.

[Byron]

He was a young kid.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. It was a baby. That's different. Babies are different. That's not. That's just awful.

[Byron]

It's.

[John Holmberg]

It's the worst.

[Byron]

Definitely the toughest because.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Dad funerals, 88, 89 year old people dying. You're like, yeah, this is a good time for everybody to get together, share store. Everybody's got. Nobody's got stories about a baby. Remember that time? It doesn't happen. Remember that time two weeks ago? He wasn't even here. He didn't.

[Byron]

He latched on like a.

[John Holmberg]

We called him the old latcher. I mean it was only 17 days on the planet, but boy, could he latch. He's a latch rock. That's the only thing that kid ever did. So let's. Funerals are celebrations of life. But if you only got like a fortnight, I'm not interested in celebrating that. That's kind of. This one's a failure. Let's just not. Let's not celebrate anything. I'll talk to you independently later. Yeesh. And Brady's looking for pinwheels and baby ribs.

[Byron]

Well, there's a funeral home in Columbus that's in the news because it's the first of its kind that actually got a liquor license. So at their receptions, yeah, it's got a bar. And they say it's about celebration of life or whatever. We're. So we've set this up for packages for people that they can, you know. One stop.

[John Holmberg]

Merry effing holidays from the Big Red Radio. Hey, it's Brett Vesely, and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?

[Byron]

Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into M and P Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wr hands.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, but what if he lives out of state?

[Byron]

Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it all online. It's really that simple.

[John Holmberg]

There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms. Hey, it's John Holmberg from the morning Sickness. When my beloved dog Dutchy started to slow down, I knew in my heart the time was going to come. That's when I reached out to Happy Endings in Home pet euthanasia. Once Dr. Fixler got to my house, he explained every step, answered all the questions, and created a peaceful, loving atmosphere right there. We were able to hold Dutchy on her favorite blanket. Happy Endings made it as peaceful and dignified as the moment could be. If your furry companion is getting close to that time, whether it's a dog or a cat, and you want the comfort of home, the compassion of professionals, and the dignity your pet deserves. Call Happy Endings. Visit online happy endings euthanasia.com because every pet's life should have a happy ending. Holmberg's morning sickness. Yeah, I think if somebody said, hey, baby. Funerals Tuesday. I just send over some white paint so they could paint that room backwards. There's a card for Don Edwards. You're going to want to paint that room back.

[Byron]

I gotta believe you're, like, maybe even moving.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I am.

[Byron]

I mean, like, next man up, I'm out that bedroom.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, I'm never going in there again. Never walking down that hall again. Yikes. No thanks. It's the best of Homburg's morning sickness. And I'm getting all the emails. Yes, he'll be in the squares, I'm sure of it. But all this Epstein talk all week long. Everybody's waiting for lists and names and Aaron Rodgers is fighting with Jimmy Kimmel and everybody's on. Stephen Hawking's name popped up on there and everybody kind of went, what? Yeah, Stephen Hawking was there. His island was wheelchair accessible. Yeah, evidently they had ramps ramped into the teen girls rooms and I don't know, Single for a little bit. No, he wasn't. He overlapped marriages.

[Byron]

Oh, that's right, he did. Dude. He went right into it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that guy didn't have a. He was a blender. Every pimp. Look, he didn't. He ain't doing the single life real well. He needs somebody to do laundry and he had that. He had his wife. That's starting to fall apart somehow. And then he had started to. I don't know how it happened, but he started to have a romantic relationship with his nanny and then married her. And again, if you, if you want to have some fun with something, Google search Stephen Hawking's wedding to the. To his caretaker. And when she, when they do, you may kiss the bride. And then me, when she starts licking those picket teeth that he little white picket fence of bottom teeth that sticks out, I'm going to kiss my wife now. Give her all that she's worth. So evidently he was on the island and I don't know what that means, but everybody's having a good time with that one because. And then, you know, is that a. It's not a nice thing to think of Stephen Hawking?

[Byron]

I mean, they had some important meetings on that island.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, no, he had like a whole science convention out on the island and.

[Byron]

Then he tried to bring the greatest minds.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. And he did it like if you had Stephen Hawking on the island, it was like. But doesn't that just basically mean it wasn't. I mean, everybody, I think everybody thinks the island was a constant just party of sex and whatever. And maybe it was, but there's Stephen Hawking on the island and everybody's like, they got him down there and there's no pictures of him like giving a speech. He's sitting at dinner, there's drinks, there's people around and it's, you know, Stephen with the girls and you know, chatting away with Sarah Ferguson from the Princess and like, okay, this is Something ain't right. But maybe the island could find it.

[Byron]

Had a good spa there at the island.

[John Holmberg]

It was sometimes, like, a good rub down. How old are you?

[Byron]

Come on.

[John Holmberg]

It doesn't matter. Like, who's guilty in that one. Like, if you're 16 and you're, you know, on the island and you've been sex trafficked, the one person you don't have to worry about is Stephen Hawking, right? Like, if he rolls into the massage room, you're just giving a massage.

[Byron]

Hard or soft?

[John Holmberg]

That doesn't matter. All of it will feel exactly the same. Rub my keypad. If not, just slash his tires and run. I mean, what's he gonna do? How hard is it? No one can hear your cries, bitch.

[Byron]

Just lock them up.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. What? What in the. If you are attacked by Stephen Hawking and lose. He sexually assaulted me. It's your fault. I'm sorry. There's victim shaming in this.

[Byron]

He's me up in the elevator.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. He rolled up against me and I couldn't move. They've got the emergency brake on. You're not going anywhere. Horror.

[Byron]

This keyboard croaked me.

[John Holmberg]

And then he just kept hitting the M button with his eyes. Get two Popsicle sticks and some bread ties. We're going to do this. Yeah. I don't understand why Stephen? But everybody's like, all the names that are on this list are like, wait a second. Huh? And then you start to wonder, was Stephen Hawking, like, a sex slave? Like, did they take him down there and abuse him? But he was down there with Epstein. It's 2006. On Little St. James, the island of sin. And, you know, these pictures came out a while ago, but they're Stephen Hawking now. The names are confirmed on the, you know, the court documents that are being released. And still more to come, too, right? Oh, yeah, I do like that. They're slow bleeding it out.

[Byron]

But I guess it's curious to see the ones that, you know what people want to know. The person that denied ever being. There's pictures. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

That's what you want. What you want is the one who's like, I never knew him, and whatever. And then, well, like what Prince Andrew tried to pull like, I don't know what you're talking about. Well, here he was at your wedding. Oh, yeah, I forgot about that. Oh, yeah. No, I do know.

[Byron]

Why don't you come over to England and we'll settle this?

[John Holmberg]

And then his pathetic excuse when he's standing there with that girl who's the teenager, and he's got his arm around her and he goes, that may or may not be my arm. The angle on this photograph, I don't even know if we're actually standing next to each other. It's like, dude, the picture, your arms around her, that may be someone's arm from another room. Yeah. Because from behind a wall, maybe that was Stephen Hawking. His. His arm crept around from her waist and put it on her hip.

[Byron]

Amazing how the royal family stepped in, like, okay, cut her a check, Andrew. Yeah, you're done.

[John Holmberg]

You're. You're out. And we're all right with that. Out of the way, Prince Andrew. It's time for a real man to get involved. Not Stephen Hawking. I can't get away. Lay down, roll over if you know what's good for you. She's got little tire tracks on her back. He did it. Evidence all over. There's DNA and Goodyear tire marks.

[Byron]

The treads match.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's you, Hawking. Did I plead innocence? She raped me. But that would have. Yeah, yeah, you can't. Like, I don't think Stephen Hawkins did anything. So it does again. It starts to make it. So the list starts bringing people out. Nothing happens. So everybody else is like, oh, I was there with Hawking, but that's a pretty impressive group out there, the Hawking list. And for him to be on that, you know, they loaded him up, they took him down to Lolita, and I guess, you know, it landed him and rolled him over.

[Byron]

One of those things that, oh, you get to go to the island. That means you're. You're somebody in a way back then.

[John Holmberg]

And also you're gonna get some money from this really, like, wealthy dude who might help your cause. That was the. Again, that's why I would have been there. We all act like we're also self righteous, but if a billionaire is like, hey, there's this conference and Stephen Hawking's gonna talk. And I know you're interested in, you know, astrophysicism and whatever they call that. I don't know.

[Byron]

He's lining people up. You know, whether he's cutting a check, he's like, oh, you meet him.

[John Holmberg]

I'm going. If he had like, you know, baseball players and stuff and like, yeah, we're doing like a little thing with a bunch of old sports stars. And I know you love the Steelers. I'm going, there's, there's Stephen Hawking in a wheelchair. Skydiving pound. Where did that come from? I think Chris Clark said it to us. I Don't even want you to land the plane. I'm getting out now. You're on ammo. Yeah, that's the whole time down. I'm going to rape an underage whore. That is going to occur.

[Byron]

You can't even say that anymore when you're. When you're jumping out on a plane.

[John Holmberg]

Geronimo. Yeah, you lose your job. All right, Steven, don't be racist. Geronimo, he can't do science anymore. Sorry. What are you supposed to say? That's a good point. What are you supposed to say when you leap out of a plane now?

[Byron]

Cowabunga. Is that safe?

[John Holmberg]

It's probably someone's name, isn't it? That sounds tribal. Like, I'm sure there's, you know, Chief Cowabunga over there in Ghana that's not real happy with scraping. Holy f. Because I'm not jumping. I'm not jumping off a plane. Well, if you can't walk, that dude that did it in that video you just showed is in a wheelchair already. What's the worst that can happen? True. He's already had one bad fall. I'm not DB Cooper. If I'm that dude, I might not pull the chute. I'm just going to throw myself out of there. But, yeah, Stephen Hawking on the island leads to some potentially funny thoughts. Although, you know, and that's how we have to deal with that island. We have to. We have to know deep down. But there. You know, there's articles from five or six years ago. They were worried Stephen Hawking was being sex trafficked down there. They were. Had fetish stuff with Hawking. But if. I wonder if Hawking was into all that.

[Byron]

He could have been a watcher.

[John Holmberg]

He was a weird dude. Like, people who knew him were like, he's a. He's a. He had a very dark. Oh, you'd have to. You're sitting in that thing with ALS and you. They gave you two years to live, and you lived 54. More. Like, every day was like, meh, I don't care anymore. It's fine. I'm going to keep living and have less use of my body. But in the. And again, I always think of our boy Larry, and Stephen Hawking had a side piece. That's the most amazing part. Stephen Hawking had a wife and a second. And there's dudes out there on bumble going, I just can't make it work. And that's just more and more proof that it's about what you are, not who you are.

[Byron]

It's how you wheel yourself around.

[John Holmberg]

It is. It's you wheeling with confidence how nice your wheelchair is. Let's just put it that way. It's like, how high end is your wheelchair? Because if you've got a rickety old wicker wheelchair with wooden wheels, you're not having. You're not getting. You're not getting a lady. You got one of them super souped up ones. A few million bucks in the bank. You're on TV every once in a while, suddenly you know you're the apple of someone's eye. And that lady plopping down in his lap in that wedding dress and kissing those teeth. I watched that documentary about him. I was fascinated. And then that came up. Like in the end, his personal life was part of it. Like, what's going on? That nanny in him, she'd wipe his ass and clean him up. And so I don't know if it was even an ass. Just a hole in his side.

[Byron]

And then change out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, and then he'd do stuff.

[Byron]

Bag lady.

[John Holmberg]

The tongue still works. And then she'd like tilt him back, put the brake on, straddle his shoulders.

[Byron]

You don't want to tilt too bad.

[John Holmberg]

No, you don't. You gotta have a brace. So she'd tilt him back onto the bed and then lock the wheels so he's on a 45. And then she'd just straddle the shoulders and he'd dardle, dargle, dardle, dardle. Oh, Steven. That's right, bitch. Take it. Let's roll over and let me see your black hole. It's just not. It's not a good thing. But yeah. So Hawking's the most fun one that's on there. I find it fascinating. It's out of control now. It's John Holmerg here from the morning sickness and it's time to talk TVs Doug Hopkins of My Home Group and Doug Hopkins dot com. Have you ever thought to yourself, I'm going to sell my house? Of course you have. And one reason or another, you just didn't do it. Probably because it's a hassle when you try to make a real estate deal. What if I could say you can sell that house the day after you say the words, I want to sell my house. Doug's been at this for over 25 years and that's why he's still on top of the Hill. TVs Doug Hopkins can handle everything. Won't move the price or you get $5,000. What do you do? Start the process right now@doug hopkins.com or grab the phone and sing Hopkins 1-800-sale now. Hey, what's up? It's Mo and my friends at the Univers University of Advancing Technology has been ranked the number one best college for computer science for not one, but two years in a row. Which makes total sense, because UAT are always on the lookout for those who don't just embrace technology, they live it. From advancing computer science and robotics to cybersecurity, gaming, and artificial intelligence, UAT is where innovation thrives. So if you're ready to lead the next tech revolution, visit uat.edu.mo and don't just study tech, live it.