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Brett Vesely
You're listening to the HMS Podcast, brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories. Hey, it's Brett Vesely and I'm here with Byron from MMP Guns. Look, Byron, I have a friend wanting to sell some guns he inherited. What's the best way for him to do that?
Byron
Brett, the last thing you want to do is sell the gun to someone who can't legally own one. Tell him not to put himself at risk and come into M and P Guns where he'll get a fair offer and he can rest easy knowing it's not getting into the wrong hands.
Brett Vesely
Okay, but what if he lives out of state?
Byron
Easy. Legalgunbuyer.com and he can do it. Really? That simple?
Brett Vesely
There you have it. MMP Guns or legalgunbuyer.com the safe and legal way to sell your firearms.
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John Holmberg
The best of the morning sickness is on the air. Do any of you people do any actual work? The rest of Holmberg's morning sickness? Yeah, so I watched a lot. Then I turned it to another thing, my favorite BBC. And I'm flipping there and they did a story about Ozempic and, you know, and all the things that are coming from a lot of people losing weight, the health benefits, the health risks. They're doing this thing and I'm kind of watching and because it kept saying the one thing they didn't expect from Ozempic that they just can't put their finger on medically, why it's happening and all. I'm like, well, call me. I'll tell you the truth. I know what's going on. Evidently it's caused a massive, like, libido rush. And I'm like, yeah, because they're not fat and gross anymore.
Ed
Losing weight to feeling good.
John Holmberg
People have sex with them now. Yeah, my wife lost tons of weight and suddenly we're having lots of. Yeah, because you're attracted to her and she doesn't feel like a house. That's easy. And they're like, what Medical things is those. Is there anything we can extract from it to bring people with low libidos back to. Yeah, it's called a treadmill. It does the same thing.
Ed
It's been ruining marriages.
John Holmberg
Yeah, well, and that was the one thing that they said the dangerous part was, is that two fat people that are on Ozempic, their love life gets back together, but one tends to want to, like, they're like, oh, they just have this insatiable sexual appetite. Yeah. They're looking in the mirror, they're like, why am I giving it to this pig?
Brett Vesely
I should remove folds out of the way and stuff.
John Holmberg
Right, man. So it's.
Byron
Yes.
Ed
And this person finds me attractive.
John Holmberg
Right. Homberg, you are officially a member of the Navajus. Well, thank you very much, Ed. Why you got to get all bigoted about it?
Doug Hopkins
Yeah.
John Holmberg
So the Ozempic thing evidently is causing a rise in sex with Ozempic people. And they're seeing that their belly's full of undigested food and their lack of a want for dinner has made it so they're blowing each other more. And I'm like, that's because they're not pigs. Now that's. That's the benefits of feeling good about yourself, is you want to start boning.
Ed
Brilliant move by Ozempic. Because it doesn't happen with Wegovy or any other generic.
Doug Hopkins
Well, so far, only Ozempic.
John Holmberg
Actually. They didn't say that. They didn't say that. Yeah. And just to be fair, if you're fattening on Wegovy, you might still want to get blown. You know, they're the one lady's like, I just. I masturbate all the time. I've got this sex drive. That's incredible. What'd she look like, though? Good now. Really? Yeah, she's dropped about 83 pounds. That's all she needed to do. She went from like. She went from like 210 to 120something. But she's got Pringles tummy. Like, they don't show them. They didn't show her outside of the Spanx. She wasn't in a bikini in her second picture. It was a nice T shirt. She looked good. But underneath all that is still the extra 80 pounds of stretch.
Brett Vesely
They should have had plastic surgeons out there, along with Planned Parenthood and vasectomy doctors and everything else.
John Holmberg
That would have been a good idea.
Ed
So many mobile units pulled up.
John Holmberg
Mobile? What do I mash out in the parking lot? How much do you hate your baby that you're Like, I'm going to wait until the mobile truck goes by.
Doug Hopkins
Or it's just a snap decision.
John Holmberg
Like, you're. Like, you are at the dnc.
Byron
Yeah.
John Holmberg
You are so liberal left that you're like, we're so for abortion that I.
Doug Hopkins
Wasn'T gonna get rid of this baby.
John Holmberg
When I saw the Planned Parenthood truck, I thought, I gotta really show my loyalty to the left, and I'm gonna get this thing sucked out of me. And graham crackers and Sprite. Everybody's there. And for me, Planned Parenthood's got a lot of nerve, having a mobile facility. That's pretty. It's like an ice cream truck of abortion.
Brett Vesely
Double scoop could have been out there handing out the plan B pills and everything else.
John Holmberg
You know, it's just weird to me that you would get on a bus. That's probably how you got pregnant in the first place, climbing on a Greyhound and ended up somewhere you didn't want to be. And. And then. And then you're. You get on a bus and like, I'm here for my abortion. Yeah. Have a seat in the driver's chair. We'll get with you in a second. And you just sit on a bus and wait it out. That's creepy. It doesn't seem professional. I guess I wouldn't do dentistry on a bus, let alone flash Makoot have that thing breaked out.
Ed
You had the mobile bus there and then the ice cream truck next to it.
John Holmberg
Yeah, that's what I was saying. I said it. It's an ice cream truck that goes by and except for instead of this music.
Doug Hopkins
Hey, the ice cream truck.
John Holmberg
It's like, oh, the abortion truck's rolling through, trying to get rid of this little demon inside me. Abortions half off, half off. Summer. Hey, mom, can I have a quarter of the abortion trucks outside? Get your.
Doug Hopkins
Get your father chocolate toasted almond bar.
John Holmberg
No, no, I'm not gonna do that. I'll bring back a bag of something, though. Ew.
Ed
Does it work? Like, the neuter mobile? Like, I'm sorry, we can't get you in. We're already.
John Holmberg
There's a line outside of people with their dogs. There's a line outside of crying teenagers with their uncles who did this. What are you getting in the bus for? Are you gonna keep our love child? No, Uncle Dave, I'm not getting in the truck and I'm gonna have this thing blown out.
Brett Vesely
Are you gonna eat them Teddy Grahams.
John Holmberg
And, like, I won't even. I don't even want to travel on an RV because You travel around with your own feces and urine for miles and miles. That makes me sick to think that we have a bucket of feces and urine in the car. You do it on a plane, too? Yeah, but I don't know.
Brett Vesely
Just wait till Friday.
John Holmberg
Oh, that's true. They might perform abortions on the back of that flight. That would. Yeah. All right. C group now available to board. And don't forget, if you're in the middle chair, abortion's half off here for the half of Southwest Airlines. It's going to make everybody normal sick. They doing abortions on our flight? Yeah. It's three hours. Kansas City. You can get. You can get like nine of them in.
Brett Vesely
It's the only advantage of the middle seat. Get half off.
John Holmberg
Would you like some peanuts or graham cracker Sprite? Like. No, just the peanuts. I know what those other things are for. Oh, you're right. But, yeah, a bus. That takes care of it. That might be pushing it a little bit.
Doug Hopkins
You can't be that proud of it.
John Holmberg
That's my thing about the abortion argument. Go ahead. But you just can't be so damn proud of it. It's not a proud moment. You know, it's. Yeah, it seems like there's, like, you know, I've seen people that have climbed Camelback less excited than people. I get it. You didn't want it, but let's not make it a point of pride. Merry effing holidays from the Big Red Radio.
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John Holmberg
Holmberg's morning sickness.
Ed
And Chicago is boarded up.
John Holmberg
Oh, and that's the other fun part is the people who don't want to wall or police or put two walls around their arena and then just cops as far as the eye can see. It was pretty funny. Oh, they're all crooks, everybody.
Byron
I'm not.
John Holmberg
Don't think I'm bashing the left because I can't stand the right either. Don't get me started on the hypocrisy of either side. My rule for abortion, if I was president, would be you get one for sure. Right. It's the fool me once law of abortion. I gotcha. Shouldn't have had that happen now. You should mind your p's and q's that you've been through this and really dodge this process. So we got your name on a list, you know, and now you're still giving the hall.
Ed
The. The hall passes on.
John Holmberg
Look, if it was rape, incest, stuff like that. But if that happens to you a couple of times, you gotta get out of the situation.
Brett Vesely
Yeah.
John Holmberg
And the other thing is that once you go in for your second one, we're hitting you with a pretty hefty. Eventually you're gonna have to keep one of them. You can't keep. You can't use it.
Ed
It's not on our time.
John Holmberg
Right. Right. That's your price. Third one's right out. There's no hat tricks in this. Like, did it again. It's like you're not learning and you're the worst person to have a child, so probably just force you to give it up. But you got to have this one. Like, if you're going for. If you're going in for a triple, you're not learning. I'll give you One and two's a stretch, but two is. Two's on your price tag. You. You get one free one. It's like, you know, it's like when you sign up for a mobile phone. First month's free. That's it. First abortion, we'll give it to you. That's it. I understand it's a medical procedure. We should probably have that. And I know there's people out there going, shouldn't happen at all. But let's be honest, it's gross to think that these people will do it no matter what. So let's keep. Keep it safe. Safe and rare like the old days. And then. But that second one, I'm.
Brett Vesely
First one's free, huh?
John Holmberg
First one, I'll give you second one you got to pay for. Third one you got to have and then give up. Like, we're not gonna make you keep it, but you got to give birth to it. We can't keep sucking these out of you. So which would you rather eat at, John? The mobile abortion place or the Sushi Mix? The mobile abortion place serves healthier foods, I think. I think. Yeah. The health inspector would have a harder time at the mobile Planned Parenthood finding problems than he would at Sushi Mix over there in that truck in 85th Avenue. I'm not eating at Sushi Mix, but I'll lick the floors of the Planned Parenthood bus before I eat it at Sushi Mix, because at least there's a doctor on in the house. He's nearby. Good Lord, Trevor, you're right. So. Well, you should combine the ideas. Abortion truck and sushi taco truck. The secret sauce, anyway. Yeah, you can't. Just can't be so excited about it. There's some people way too excited. Like, the crowd was cheering so loudly at the idea of abortion, and I'm like, I get it. I get where you stand there, but can you have a little middle ground here? Don't go throwing your arm in the air like you just won the Super Bowl. We get it.
Ed
The outside was kind of like that. What was that? Jeremy Pivens moving the. Like, Politically Incorrect or.
John Holmberg
Oh, pcu. Pcu.
Ed
Every protesting group was out there.
John Holmberg
They love that stuff. Protest. I don't. I've never cared about something so much to protest. I don't. I would never. I just don't march. I'm not marching. It doesn't seem to do anything. Like, there's been an awful lot of marches, and I'm not really seeing a lot of results from it. Seems like just everybody Just gets pissed off. Then it's. Then the next day, nobody cares. Like that whole thing back in 2020, when every day was a march. I'm not so sure anything really came of that. They wrecked the mall otherwise, I'm not real sure. Did anything change outside of just. No. I mean, other than the.
Ed
They busted the window looks nice.
John Holmberg
The mall looks better. They got some upgrades on insurance. They get insurance money. The piano store, for whatever reason, got broken into. Like they were going to steal one of those.
Brett Vesely
Who the hell's doing that?
John Holmberg
George Floyd's honor. Like, he always loved baby grands. I'm like, I don't think that's true. But he busted into the piano store. I don't really think marching works. I think, yeah, because the teachers did it. And they act like that was why they got a raise, but it was because you guys stopped showing up to school. That's why you left those awful kids home with their parents. And they're like, give the teachers a little more. I can't deal with this kid anymore. I don't know. But abortion seems to be a bit of a celebration. I'm thinking maybe we missed the boat on that one a little bit. It's not something to be real proud of. I got me an abortion. Good for you. I was on Southwest airlines and we were like, no, no, no.
Ed
Did you hear the news? We can have them.
Doug Hopkins
We can get them all day if we want.
John Holmberg
Heck, they come to us now. It's like new vision auto glass. It's at my convenience. You should have to, like, go to.
Ed
A place, I think go to the next level. It's their waymos pulls up in front of your house.
John Holmberg
Oh, they're here. What's really bad is, like, I think of, like, yeah, you have to order the truck and it's not gonna come up. People will start to know what it is. And if it stops at your house, you're like, oh, looks like the homburg gal got knocked up again. It's like the bus or.
Doug Hopkins
How many is that?
John Holmberg
I don't know. Her friends doing it here because her dad will kill her if he fought. We had. We're just housing it. Couldn't do that in the park.
Ed
They'll have to rewrap it. Just like when you're. Yeah, back in the day when they'd send you stuff from a adult catalog or whatever.
John Holmberg
But you knew what it was because of the brown paper wrapping.
Ed
Video gameplay. Score out, frontier.
Doug Hopkins
You know what?
John Holmberg
Maybe it is just sushi mix. Maybe that's what that thing was. And it's just disguised as, like, the worst food ever. So nobody ever walks up to it to try to get mobile Mexican sushi. But deep down in that neighborhood, everybody knows nobody's doing that.
Ed
They're not gonna do that.
John Holmberg
That's a good point.
Ed
It'll be pest control.
John Holmberg
You're right. In the avenues, there's no need for an abortion truck. Those folks keep them crawling with them. There's usually a lady at her quinceanera bouncing her kid on her knee. So it's like, all right. And I'm fine with that, too. I'm fine with what anybody thinks. You don't like them. I'm with you. I get your side. You want one? I get you. I'm with you, too. Just don't celebrate it. And don't. And the other side can't start saying, well, you should have the incest rape baby.
Doug Hopkins
Like, that's just.
John Holmberg
Yeah, no, you're wrong. That's just an awful thing to make something. In that case, I'd drive the Planned Parenthood bus into Rape incest Bill and say, bring out the hillbilly, because we got two things to do. It's got a little cage in the back. How's the rapist? You take him to jail after he has to watch the whole thing. That's gross. So that's our. That's our nation. That's what we're voting on. That's. There's all this other stuff going on in the world, and we're still arguing about this one. Which makes me think it's all choreographed nonsense to make the masses talk about something that doesn't matter. And they just go on stealing our money. And other.
Commercial Announcer
With.
John Holmberg
It's crazy. So I go right back to just saying she did. That's how I feel almost every day. She. It's out of control now.
Doug Hopkins
It's John Holmberg here, and it's time to talk about TVs Doug Hopkins of my home group and doughns.com.
John Holmberg
I got a call from Doug the.
Doug Hopkins
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Theme:
The episode dives into recent studies about weight loss drugs like Ozempic and Wegovy—notably, their unexpected effect in boosting sexual appetite and libido among users. The Morning Sickness crew (John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Ed, Byron, and guest Doug Hopkins) serves up irreverent humor and hot takes, quickly spinning off into provocative social commentary about weight loss, attraction, sexual relationships, and, ultimately, a sharp, comedic debate about abortion rights, mobile clinics, and the culture wars.
The conversation shifts heavily—using irreverent comedy—into a lengthy satire on mobile abortion clinics, American attitudes toward abortion, and the hypocrisy of both ends of the political spectrum.
| Timestamp | Speaker | Quote | |-----------|---------|-------| | 01:39 | John Holmberg | “Evidently it's caused a massive, like, libido rush. And I'm like, yeah, because they're not fat and gross anymore.” | | 01:58 | John Holmberg | “People have sex with them now. Yeah, my wife lost tons of weight and suddenly we're having lots of...” | | 02:20 | John Holmberg | “...but one tends to want to—like, they're like, ‘oh, they just have this insatiable sexual appetite.’ Yeah. They're looking in the mirror, they're like, ‘why am I giving it to this pig?’” | | 03:58 | Brett Vesely | “They should have plastic surgeons out there, along with Planned Parenthood and vasectomy doctors and everything else.” | | 04:26 | John Holmberg | “Planned Parenthood's got a lot of nerve, having a mobile facility. That's pretty—it’s like an ice cream truck of abortion.” | | 07:16 | John Holmberg | “That's my thing about the abortion argument. Go ahead. But you just can't be so damn proud of it. It's not a proud moment.” | | 09:28 | John Holmberg | “Don’t think I’m bashing the left because I can’t stand the right either. Don’t get me started on the hypocrisy of either side. My rule for abortion, if I was president, would be you get one for sure...” | | 11:08 | John Holmberg | “First one, I'll give you. Second one you got to pay for. Third one you got to have and then give up… You get one free one. It's like, you know, it's like when you sign up for a mobile phone. First month's free.” | | 12:00 | John Holmberg | “You just can't be so excited about it. Some people way too excited... Don’t go throwing your arm in the air like you just won the Super Bowl. We get it.” | | 16:07 | John Holmberg | “...we’re still arguing about this one. Which makes me think it’s all choreographed nonsense to make the masses talk about something that doesn’t matter. And they just go on stealing our money.” |
| Timestamp | Segment Highlight | |-----------|------------------| | 01:07 | Ozempic study discussion begins (John on BBC report) | | 01:39 | Libido surge in Ozempic users, causes & jokes | | 03:58 | Satire on “comprehensive” mobile health trucks | | 04:26 | Ice cream truck/abortion truck riff | | 07:16 | Philosophical take: abortion pride & moral nuance | | 09:28 | “Fool me once” abortion law—humorous policy proposal | | 12:00 | Critiques of protest culture and manufactured outrage | | 16:07 | Show closes with larger social commentary and skepticism |
The conversation features the Morning Sickness show’s hallmark snark: irreverent, brash, and unfiltered, blending real social issues with relentless, rapid-fire jokes and dark humor. John Holmberg drives much of the commentary, interspersed with quips from the supporting cast.