BEST OF HMS PODCAST - COMBINED SEGMENTS - Wednesday - 01-01-25

Summary

Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: BEST OF HMS PODCAST - COMBINED SEGMENTS - Wednesday - 01-01-25

Release Date: January 1, 2025

---

1. Introduction

In this "Best of" episode from Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, Holmberg's Morning Sickness brings together some of the most memorable and engaging segments featuring host John Holmberg alongside Brady Bogan, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo. The episode captures a blend of humor, local anecdotes, and offbeat discussions that aim to entertain and provoke thought among listeners.

---

2. Unexplained Aerial Phenomena: UFOs or Military Operations?

Timestamp: 03:07 - 05:00

The show kicks off with a lively debate about an unusual sighting over South Mountain—a streak in the sky resembling a tornado. John Holmberg shares his firsthand account of witnessing the phenomenon while driving back from Desert Ridge.

John Holmberg (03:07):
"They said it looked a little bit like there was a tornado out of nowhere in the middle of the sky about sunset last night."

Brady Bogan adds to the discussion by mentioning a friend's encounter with what appeared to be a giant Roman candle from Vandenberg Air Force Base.

Brady Bogan (03:44):
"Last weekend, blew it up. That's from Vandenberg Air Force Base in California. That's not close."

The conversation veers into speculation about whether these sightings are mundane military operations or something extraterrestrial.

John Holmberg (04:45):
"It was a spaceship. Which would be a good indication of potential astronaut Jones."

Through humorous banter, the hosts explore various theories, ultimately leaning towards it being a military test flight rather than alien activity.

---

3. Aliens Among Us: Probing and Social Dynamics

Timestamp: 05:22 - 16:00

The discussion evolves into an imaginative dialogue about alien intentions, particularly focusing on the trope of extraterrestrial probing.

John Holmberg (06:52):
"Do you wanna ride through space in a souped up spaceship?"

Brady Bogan and John Holmberg humorously debate the ethics and logistics of alien interactions, poking fun at the idea of being probed for space travel.

Brady Bogan (07:23):
"You get a free Vandersex T-shirt?"

John Holmberg (07:38):
"I want the view from Earth. Thank you. I see it. You wouldn't."

The conversation highlights the hosts' knack for blending satire with contemporary UFO lore, creating an entertaining narrative that resonates with listeners' fascination with the unknown.

---

4. Breastfeeding at Sporting Events: Navigating Public Perceptions

Timestamp: 19:27 - 39:57

A significant portion of the episode addresses the contentious issue of breastfeeding at sporting events, sparked by an email from a listener recounting an altercation during a Suns-Clippers game.

John Holmberg (19:27):
"She needed to have that need to get fixed and fixed right. Two years later, she's running like she used to again."

The hosts delve into societal attitudes towards breastfeeding in public spaces, emphasizing the double standards women face regarding body exposure.

John Holmberg (22:46):
"When you pop one out, we notice. When you start milking it, you know what else is natural? I milk myself. Every."

Brady Bogan and John Holmberg propose tongue-in-cheek strategies for men to counteract invasive behavior, such as filming breastfeeding as a form of passive resistance.

Brady Bogan (28:47):
"Don’t waste a noodle."
(Referring to a story about a child at the game but used humorously in the context of breastfeeding discussions.)

The segment blends humor with sharp social commentary, highlighting the awkwardness and discomfort surrounding public breastfeeding, while advocating for empathetic responses.

---

5. Listener Stories: Navigating Social Faux Pas

Timestamp: 38:14 - 86:12

Throughout the episode, listeners share a variety of anecdotes that the hosts dissect with their characteristic humor and irreverence. One standout story involves a woman breastfeeding her child at a sports event, leading to heated confrontations.

John Holmberg (58:48):
"If you find buried treasure, shut your mouth."

Another listener recounts the theft and recovery of a stolen car, providing a platform for John and Brady to discuss issues of trust and personal responsibility.

Brady Bogan (62:15):
"Well, she had an officer working the case, right. And he calls her back the next day and says yeah, we've got highway footage of the people and they were able to get in close enough to see to identify the driver."

These stories serve as a springboard for broader discussions on societal norms, legal matters, and human behavior, all delivered with the show's signature comedic twist.

---

6. Celebrity Guests and Pop Culture References

Timestamp: 86:33 - End

The episode features light-hearted banter about pop culture, including mentions of celebrities like Joe Rogan and fictional references from shows like Fear Factor and The Sopranos. A notable segment introduces Joe Rogan as a guest planning to film a DVD of his comedy act, adding a layer of celebrity interaction to the show.

John Holmberg (114:52):
"We just got the cut. Heather. The heavy Heather came in here."

Additionally, the hosts reference current events and trends, such as the popularity of certain characters in adult entertainment and the launch of new reality shows like MILF Manor.

Brady Bogan (145:00):
"Look for the love of younger guys. Here's the twist. The eight MILFs have their eight sons on the island."

These segments showcase the hosts' ability to seamlessly integrate pop culture into their discussions, keeping the content relevant and engaging.

---

7. Conclusion

This "Best of" episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness encapsulates the show's unique blend of humor, local storytelling, and provocative discussions. From debating UFO sightings and alien intentions to navigating the complexities of public breastfeeding, John Holmberg and his crew deliver content that is both entertaining and thought-provoking. The inclusion of listener stories and pop culture references further enriches the episode, making it a quintessential representation of what makes Holmberg's Morning Sickness Arizona's top morning radio show.

---

Notable Quotes:

• John Holmberg (03:07):
  "They said it looked a little bit like there was a tornado out of nowhere in the middle of the sky about sunset last night."

• Brady Bogan (03:44):
  "Last weekend, blew it up. That's from Vandenberg Air Force Base in California. That's not close."

• John Holmberg (19:27):
  "She needed to have that need to get fixed and fixed right. Two years later, she's running like she used to again."

• Brady Bogan (28:47):
  "Don’t waste a noodle."

• John Holmberg (58:48):
  "If you find buried treasure, shut your mouth."

These quotes highlight the show's engaging and often humorous approach to discussing both serious and lighthearted topics.

Transcript

[John Holmberg]

All right, HMS Podcast, time again to let you know where to go for some great comedy in the Valley this week. Get out to the Tempe Improv on the east side to see Paul Versey on Thursday and Beth Stelling Friday, Saturday and Sunday. The Desert Ridge Improv up North features Sarah Weinschenk this Thursday and Joe DeRosa on Friday and Saturday. And downtown at Stand Up Live, check out the very funny Lil Rel performing Friday, Saturday and Sunday for the complete lineups. And for tickets, go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's John Holberg here. For the amazing people at the Core Institute, life can throw you a curveball now and again. One day you're trucking along, feeling great. Next day your dog smashes into your head and knocks you cold. Or like a KUPD listener told me this week, his dog did a sprint across the backyard directly into the side of his wife's leg and blew her knee up. She needed that need to get fixed and fixed right. Two years later, she's running like she used to again. And it's all thanks to the Core Institute. I went through it too, and you can get rid of your pain and start saying yes, I can to all the things you want to do. And and all you have to do is trust the experts at the Core Institute. Head there right now. The Core Institute.com college hoops are here.

[Brady Bogan]

And there's no better place to catch.

[John Holmberg]

The action than Hooters.

[Brady Bogan]

Fuel up with the baller bundle.

[John Holmberg]

10 boneless wings, crispy fries, dressing and a fountain drink starting at just $9.99. Want to level up your game day experience?

[Brady Bogan]

Swap the fountain drink for a Beat the Buzzer special featuring your choice of Beatbox or Buzz balls for a low price.

[John Holmberg]

This offer is for game days only.

[Brady Bogan]

So grab your crew, enjoy the action, and feast on the flavors you Hooters.

[John Holmberg]

The original wing joint since 1983. Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with Wayne.

[Brady Bogan]

From Amco and Wayne. Now that it's getting warmer, I turned on the AC in my car and the air's blowing. Kind of cool, but it really smells like a basement. What can I do about that, Larry?

[John Holmberg]

Your car's AC system should be checked and serviced every year. Plus, replacing the cabin air filter helps the air blow strong and takes away any nasty smell. Nice.

[Brady Bogan]

Is that a big deal to get done?

[John Holmberg]

Not at all. It takes about an hour and in most cases we can do it while you wait.

[Brady Bogan]

That's awesome.

[John Holmberg]

I'll say. We're Amco.

[Brady Bogan]

Google Amco for your nearest location.

[John Holmberg]

That's Amco, Double A, MCO Trans, and a whole lot more. Do not listen to this while driving or when full alertness is needed. The best of Holmberg's Morning Sickness. This is the Big Red radio. Hey, you're listening to the Best of Homburg's Morning Sickness. I haven't been in it for a while, but that's okay. There's just a lot of great stuff that happens here with John and the crew in the morning.

[Brady Bogan]

But if you do like some of my stuff.

[John Holmberg]

Frank Caliento, by the way. Hey, folks, John mad here. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'll be at the Desert Ridge Empire.

[Brady Bogan]

Improv January 31st through February 1st. Desertridgeimprov.com for tickets. You're tired of the pugs.

[John Holmberg]

I get it. Back to the Best of Homburg's Morning sickness. The best of. Did I say that? I don't know.

[Brady Bogan]

I didn't pay attention.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know if you saw it yesterday. Did you see it yesterday, Brady?

[Brady Bogan]

Any hurricane coverage?

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no, no. Hurricane coverage was pretty big, though. But you know what I'm talking about. The thing in the sky last night. The. You know what I'm talking about. You guys didn't see over South Mountain. Oh, yeah, I heard about that. Oh, yeah? What was it?

[Brady Bogan]

Strong bear sending up flares.

[John Holmberg]

It was weird. Is there a picture of it? Yeah. They said it looked a little bit like there was a tornado out of nowhere in the middle of the sky about sunset last night. And of course, there's answers already. They say that the streak was a. It was a contrail from a rocket that carried a satellite into space last night. But you take a look on the COVID of the paper. What's. It was weird. I don't know if you saw it. You guys didn't see it. I was driving back from Desert Ridge when I saw it.

[Brady Bogan]

My friend told me he picked up this giant Roman candle in Rocky Point.

[John Holmberg]

Last weekend, Blew it up. That's from Vandenberg Air Force Base in California. That's not close. You know, and I watched the Los Angeles news last night on the satellite. Yeah. They weren't talking about it. Think. If it made that thing in our sky, what did it do to theirs? H. Hmm.

[Brady Bogan]

And yet there's a bigger one.

[John Holmberg]

I know. Look at that shot. Same picture, only bigger. So it was the air force running a mission. They were blowing up something and shooting it into space. But they're doing it in California.

[Brady Bogan]

I think it was another monkey in a rocket.

[John Holmberg]

I think. Damn it, man. With your monkey talk. Monkeys can't fly rockets. Monkeys in space, they just stuff them in the rockets and then they shoot them up. But if they're not talking about it in Los Angeles, what it did to their sky, what's it showing up in our sky for? Aliens. Aliens. It was weird, but I think it is.

[Brady Bogan]

Feel. She probed last night or anything I did.

[John Holmberg]

I knew who was doing it. It's cool. I know exactly what was going on. It was all right. I have a feeling it's like Independence Day. Our government has a. Wait a minute. Ships under. You mean today? Today we celebrate our Independence Day. Worst speech in movie history. Thanks. Anyway, there's a bunch of ships underneath them mountains. You think they're just launching them out of. Air Force is trying them out. That's what's going on. That's what I think. I'm telling you. I think something's brewing. They've always got an answer. Oh, yeah. We're firing a satellite up. What do I. You fire satellites up all the time. Area 51, man. But if that's a.

[Brady Bogan]

You know, if that's a rocket.

[John Holmberg]

Rocket. I'm taking a rocket.

[Brady Bogan]

Traveling. It doesn't look like it's going up by any means. Suitcase, more or less shooting across.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, look at me. Yeah. It's not going up. It's a spaceship.

[Brady Bogan]

Which would be a good indication.

[John Holmberg]

It.

[Brady Bogan]

Potential astronaut. Jones.

[John Holmberg]

I want the truth. It was weird, though, last night. And I got that vibe right away that something was bad. It's just a satellite. We're shooting up 500 miles from where you saw it. Okay. Thanks for asking. Phoenix has. A lot of strange things happen as far as those lights go. I've lived in a lot of cities, never seen anything like all this. We get that every few years. Someday one of the three of us will be probed by aliens again. And it ain't gonna be me this time. Yeah. Cause you came back weird. Yeah. I'm gonna demand you guys get probed. But Yeah. I need D.B.

[Brady Bogan]

Sweeney to come back. He can cover for all of us.

[John Holmberg]

We asked this question a couple years ago. And now that the aliens are back, let me see if you changed your answer. Would you get probed for a ride on the spaceship.

[Brady Bogan]

Including weekends?

[John Holmberg]

I don't know. What is it? A cell phone deal? Yeah. Yeah. You get free family minutes, too. Is there a guarantee? I' it's up to you. Maybe you don't want To. But you're gonna get horribly probed. Yeah, you're coming back horribly probed. I mean, you're getting probed. Probed is never not horrible.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll pass on the space ride.

[John Holmberg]

Are you kidding?

[Brady Bogan]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Are you? You don't wanna ride through space in a souped up spaceship.

[Brady Bogan]

Not if they said you gotta be horribly probed. Well being.

[John Holmberg]

When are you ever pleasantly probed?

[Brady Bogan]

You haven't been around.

[John Holmberg]

I got the Shazam once from a girl and that was just her finger. And that was H. You do it. Do I get to see the probe first? Do I get to. I don't know, Eric. I don't know.

[Brady Bogan]

Get a free Vander sex T shirt?

[John Holmberg]

You get. Yeah. And then you get a ride in the spaceship for. And then a T shirt. I got probed and all I got was this lousy T shirt. Would you take that ride? Would you do it, man? I think I might. I would.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, considering it.

[John Holmberg]

Now think of this.

[Brady Bogan]

Considering what he pay. What the NSYNC boy pay.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but that's just to go on Earth. Space. That's not. Yeah, we're talking about aliens meeting aliens, Brady. You know, and this is funny, this is a nice little sociology planet. And actually maybe, I don't know, maybe if they like you, they'll take you to your. Then cook you dinner and then maybe.

[Brady Bogan]

That'S what I'm talking about.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I look at my boy, my alien boy cooking me dinner. All I'm saying is think of what guys talk about. We're talking about it right now. Would we get probed to go for a ride in a spaceship? But think of how hard we try to talk women into letting us go back door and they don't get a ride on a spaceship. Yeah, they do it in a heartbeat. And we get mad. We're like, yeah, just. She won't come on. You gotta let me in there. But we're like debating whether or not.

[Brady Bogan]

They may not be getting a ride to spaceship, but they're getting a ride to heaven.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, whatever. All I'm saying is it's a paradise. Everybody take a pro Toledo. Would you take the probe for the ride in the spaceship? How far is it going? It's about four inches in here. Everybody's got questions. Four inches, Is that what you meant? How far is it going? The probe wise, how far the probe goes in? Yeah. Four to seven inches. All right, screw it. Seven. Let's say 10 inches. Oh, how big is it? That's a. It's like a black guy no, you're not doing it. Then it's a ride in space for free. I'll. I like the view from Earth. Thank you. I see it. You wouldn't.

[Brady Bogan]

You'd do it for a ride in a Lamborghini, So. That's not a fair question.

[John Holmberg]

Do I get to keep the car?

[Brady Bogan]

No.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, no. His fascination with probing is very strange.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, but you've had the teaser before already.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Jackie, shazam me like, 12 years ago. Yeah. So you're fine. You're. You're loose.

[Brady Bogan]

Quit asking me these probing questions. I can't.

[John Holmberg]

Who's this? Hey, my name's Dale. Hey, Dale, would you get probed for a ride in space? Sure. Okay. Come on down. What the hell, man? What the hell? Come on now. Oh, you want. Can I get the ride first? No, no. You gotta prepay crap. Okay. And then I was in San Diego last night when that rocket went off. Yeah. Did you see it? All I saw was the contrail. You could hear it. And it, like, emptied out the bar. And everybody shrugged their shoulders, and I was like, well, there's an icbm. Horribly, something's going to kill us all. Yeah. And it was. It wasn't going vertical. It was going horizontally. It was, like, headed to Alaska. Oh, really? We're bombing Alaska? Maybe. I don't know. It's a trip. That ain't no satellite. Satellites go up. That's what I thought. They go straight up. Yeah, it was some test rocket shot from Sparwar or something. Oh, wow.

[Brady Bogan]

Everybody.

[John Holmberg]

Everybody was just like, oh, another rocket. Wow. Okay. Well, there you go. So you saw it right there in California, and they weren't talking about it there, huh? No. Everybody just completely shrugged their shoulders. It was like, seriously, like. Well, we're not alarmed, and we're not gonna look alarmed. All right, there you go. Nice job, man. They got enough problems in Cali. Good luck. We'll talk to you later. Yeah, they do.

[Brady Bogan]

You're gonna get this old, you know, probing for a ride in space, and then this alien commander's gonna come up and say this. Fine. Then we're gonna ride you by probing.

[John Holmberg]

Who's this? This is Dave. Dave, would you get probed for riding space? Nah. Why not? Because I don't. I don't think that's why we're here. Why are we here?

[Brady Bogan]

I agree.

[John Holmberg]

What do you do with lab rats when you introduce chemicals and stuff into their environment? I have no idea. You cut them open. Check their organ organs, their reproductive systems, the brain. You check everything. Now, what are the aliens Doing when they. They're getting us open.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

They're probing us. They're checking our orgasms. They're checking everything that makes you think we're naturally born to this planet. You know that all the dinosaurs did practically die on the same day.

[Brady Bogan]

So Dave, you believe there's some. Some aliens that have come down and killed dinosaurs?

[John Holmberg]

Do you think they probed the dinosaurs? Sure. All they gotta do is hit a meteor into the planet. Make it look natural. Wow. And I've been listening to Art Bell. So wait a minute. If these. Now I want to change my answer. If the same aliens come back to probe the dinosaurs. I don't want that probe. No, thank you. That's not worth it. If they can probe a T. Rex and then come back. Yeah, yeah. I want that. I want the little probe. It's. It's in that second aisle at Fascinations. The plug. I want.

[Brady Bogan]

If you.

[John Holmberg]

What do you guys think about that though? I agree. They would cut you open. I don't think so. Yeah, they would. The aliens I'm talking about thinking of nicely now. Probably what you guys saw in the last night was this plane called the Aurora. You know what the Aurora is, right? It's a thing around the nipple.

[Brady Bogan]

You talking about?

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no. The Aurora is an air breather plane that flies in the stratosphere. Oh. And it. And it leaves a nice contrail behind it. And it's very noisy. Okay. I don't understand it. But that's fine. So it wasn't aliens. All right, we'll talk to you later. Thanks. Dinosaurs getting probe.

[Brady Bogan]

If you could hang out with a T for a weekend. Like hunting Forge with the T. Rex.

[John Holmberg]

As a T. Rex.

[Brady Bogan]

As a T. Rex. But you had to get probed by a Triceratops in my body now or.

[John Holmberg]

In my T. Rex body later?

[Brady Bogan]

In your human body?

[John Holmberg]

No. All right.

[Brady Bogan]

This is out of control.

[John Holmberg]

You've gone too far. All right. If you could have sex with Cindy Crawford. But you had to get probed by aliens first with the horn of a Triceratop. Tops.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm in.

[John Holmberg]

Me too. Okay. O. That's bloody.

[Brady Bogan]

Do we get to choose the horn?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You can take the little one if you want. But it's still. It's bigger. It just looks small next to the big horn. Aliens are in my nose. They're in my nose. Who's this? It's Worm. Worm. What's going on? Hey, I. I take the probe, dude. Yeah, we don't. Good for you, man. His name's Worm for that.

[Brady Bogan]

You like Window seat or.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, what would you like? Would you like the chicken or the steak? Would you like probing or non? All right, good for you, man. Please, it's a great question. All right, Worm, thanks for shouting that out. A lunchbox says he'll probe people for free rides around in his work truck. I'll probe chicks for rides in my convertible. Nice guy, man. We'll talk to you later. Good call, lunchbox. He always screams that. All right. Yeah, I think most people would take the pro. Victor Ashton. Olin. Who's this? This is Eric, man. Go ahead. Well, I was kind of thinking that the particular aliens you're talking about there, John, they got to be gay, man. Because I don't understand why they can build a spaceship, get to Earth and then they want to find out about you. They still got to go for the leather cheerio.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, yeah, that's a good point.

[John Holmberg]

That's the instant with just a fingernail or a lock of hair. Can they. Can the trip need be negotiated for, you know, a less intrusive body part? Dude, it's not csi. They're not. They're not going for DNA tests. They want in. Why they going for the button? Yeah, what do they know down there? Why not? Maybe they are fabulous gay aliens, but they've still got a kick ass ship that goes out into space. You never hear a gay guy complaining about being probed by aliens, do you? Oh, I had a wonderful trip. That's. Well, you never hear about it because they're hoping it happens again. They don't want to jinx it. You know, I could tolerate a weekend with gay aliens if they're taking me around the universe. Might even make out with one. But I'm just saying, you know, if I'm on Venus or Uranus.

[Brady Bogan]

Or Uranus, I bet you the inside of that spaceship's just immaculate.

[John Holmberg]

The color and the furniture, really clean. Think of what George Carlin said in Jameson and Bob Strike Back. If you're even hitching a ride, you still gotta take a shot in the back of the mouth. You know, if you're going through the universe. Cast grass or piece of mad. Exactly. Nobody rides for free.

[Brady Bogan]

That spaceship door opens up and you walk on, there's Jamiroquai playing.

[John Holmberg]

It's just a gay club. The Manhole. All right. Good call, man. Thanks. Later. I'm just saying it opens a can of. Can of worms. And if you say no, you're an idiot.

[Brady Bogan]

I guess I'm an idiot.

[John Holmberg]

You would say no to. Just a gentle probing.

[Brady Bogan]

You didn't say gentle?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. You didn't say violent. Violent, horrible. Probe.

[Brady Bogan]

No, that's crazy.

[John Holmberg]

Why is the key to mankind in our anus? I don't know, but it must be because even as men, we're searching for it too. That's true. Because we are looking for the key to mankind in women's anuses.

[Brady Bogan]

If I'm in. In the middle of a yerapa prima colon cleansing, I might go.

[John Holmberg]

If you feel clean, it'll be a.

[Brady Bogan]

Little payback for those aliens.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I wouldn't shower the day. I know I'm getting probed, but yeah, I take the probing. And if I'm in Uranus and a couple of the aliens are like, come on, you're. You're on Uranus, man. Let me probe you. But you already probing. Let me do it again. All right, they're Italians now. Yeah. Come on. Hey, the probe. You watch. I'm gonna probe you again. Okay? Yeah, you can probe me. We're on Uranus. Don't say anything.

[Brady Bogan]

Eric, if there was a house game with aliens, Texas hold them, I'm in.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, but I gotta get probed.

[Brady Bogan]

No, you'd get it.

[John Holmberg]

Do I get to win American dollars or alien dollars? The only thing I won't do is take a. Take the money shot. If the money shot is coming my direction. From an alien, you don't know what's on. Yeah, it could burn 706 in the morning.

[Brady Bogan]

We can kill it.

[John Holmberg]

It's an interesting thought. And since aliens shot up a rocket last night over there in California. We saw it hanging out over the city, Phoenix. I thought I'd ask. We've had this debate before. I just want to see if anything's changed and pretty much no. I'm still the only guy just bending over backwards for the aliens. Taking it in the chute for a ride around space. It's a once in a lifetime opportunity.

[Brady Bogan]

Worm's with you.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, Worm and I'll do it. That's a good guy to have on your side. Just having him scream lunchbox every time he's getting.

[Brady Bogan]

Probably riding lunchbox truck this afternoon.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, I know you are. Oh, God. It's the morning signal. Look out, aliens. We're ready for you. Get the lube. It's 98, KUPD, Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. 98K UBD. Hi, I'm Diane Fisher from Fisher Tools. From our humble beginnings in 1964 at the Phoenix park and swap to our 4 acre campus located just south of Tempe Marketplace off the 202. Emmett Clintock Fisher Tools has been building the valley for over 60 years. Come check us out and browse our huge selection of tools and anything you need to do the job right. We car Milwaukee, DeWalt, Makita, Proto and so much more. We're also [e-mail] KUPD listeners will receive 10% off their order when you mention this ad. Fisher Tools if we don't have it, we can't sell it.

[Brady Bogan]

It's Dick Toledo and new customers right now on FanDuel.

[John Holmberg]

Get $150 in bonus bets when your.

[Brady Bogan]

First $5 wager wins. Just visit FanDuel.com KUPD to grab $150 in college hoops bonus bets with a winning $5 bet and prepare for March on FanDuel, America's number one sportsbook 21.

[John Holmberg]

Plus and present in Arizona.

[Brady Bogan]

First online real money wager only $5 first deposit required. Bonus issued as non withdrawable bonus bets.

[John Holmberg]

Which expire seven days after receipt.

[Brady Bogan]

Restrictions apply. See [e-mail] gambling problem. Call 1-800-next-step or text next step to 53342.

[John Holmberg]

You just gave me my reach around here's another best of rerun from the morning sickness. But Bol bowl, he stayed in the whole second half and it was the only thing worth watching except for this email I got here this morning said, hey John, last night I was at the Suns Clippers game and the woman in front of me started breastfeeding her kid who had to be at least two. He was standing up every once in a while wrong with people. The guy next to me said, hey, is that the best place to do this? And she went off screaming. I have a right. It's a natural thing. It's people like you, blah blah blah. I didn't really see what was going on until the dust up and then I noticed it and the kid was latched on.

[Brady Bogan]

She was ugly.

[John Holmberg]

Then another woman comes down. That's what I'm thinking. Another woman comes down and says, hey, why don't you guys mind your own business and watch the game. Leave this woman alone. I hadn't said anything, but things got so out of hand it got weird. Did you go to the game last night? Did you hear about this? The woman was incredibly emotional, started to scream that her rights had been violated. I ask you your question basically is what the made me yell that? Victor no, I didn't. But I would have liked that. I don't sit in the 200 section, so that doesn't happen where I sit. But breastfeeding at a son's game, you're allowed to say, hey, lady, take it somewhere else.

[Brady Bogan]

Your seats, they provide a pump and a private room.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you got a. You got a. Well, there's a wet nurse and there's like, you know. Yeah. Where that guy's three rows behind him. He didn't even notice. There was probably a childbirth. There was probably something even worse going up in that 200 section, settling lawsuits. I did not see the breastfeeding thing. But, yeah, you're not. You can't do that at a sporting event. No, I know, ladies, you're. You're sitting there thinking, it's all. If it was natural. You know what else is natural? Like the look of the ladies in the National Geography Graphic. That's natural. So if you want to start acting all natural all the time, whip them out, walk around, put a basket on your head and have kids latched on all the time. And then we'll. But you do women, your breastfeeding argument goes away the second you have a nip slip and you get mad about it. You. You go to great lengths to hide your cans from men and from public view constantly. And then when it comes down to breastfeeding, when a guy notices that. Oh, my God, a can again, because we're not supposed to see them. We're not supposed to see boobs. Unless, like, there's permission slips and legal document. Like, boobs are not supposed to just pop out. And when you pop one out, we notice. We say something. When you, when you start milking it. You know what else is natural? I milk myself. I milk myself. Every. That's natural. It's a. Sometimes it helps me calm down. Sun's game can get a little anxious sometimes. Maybe if I just started beating off every once in a while just to cool my anxiety, I could look at you and go, hey, it's not sexual. It's a natural feature on the body. Peeing is also natural. I take it to another room. I don't just go in my cup. So this breastfeeding argument of how you can do it anywhere you want because it's nature and blah. No, not at a sunscreen. There are times when you can just park bench it and try to. But do the best to kind of conceal it. Because again, again, your argument of its natural is absolute bull. Cause so is peeing and pooping. And we're not allowed to just break out and do that and then start going, what are you looking at? Hey, you're Taking a. The park. Yeah. Well, it's natural. Of course it's natural. We have rooms for that. But that's the biggest thing. If you want it to be no big deal, then start showing your cans more. And don't act like it's a big deal when your nipples pop out, because if you see, I agree. Not all of you. Not all of you. Look, let me be the arbiter of who can do this, you know? You know? Yes, yes, Hildy, yes. But, yeah, if you're. If you're screaming and yelling about how it's men or something's wrong with us, when we notice that you're breastfeeding, it isn't.

[Brady Bogan]

I noticed over the break at a.

[John Holmberg]

You saw us breastfeeding? Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

And again, the difference. It wasn't like she wasn't. She wasn't, like, hideous, but it's like you looked over there. You can't help notice.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, okay, there's a boob out.

[Brady Bogan]

I guess we're latching on right here.

[John Holmberg]

We look down shirts. Women know it. Cleavage is a big deal because maybe you'll see something. They know that it's all. It's revealing. They call it. Ooh. It's a revealing, but not too revealing. You don't want to show your nipples, but you'll show us all the rest. So we do the work from there. It's just men. It's. We. We hunt with our eyes. You start looking like, oh, geez, your nipples almost out. You don't suppose. And we try to find it. And you know that you. You know that the game of cat and mouse is basically, my nipple's almost out. Ooh. And we're like, I know, I've been looking. If you just whip one out, we're gonna go nipple like. Alarms go off because we have to fight so hard to see them. And then. And then the argument of it's natural, no garbage. And at a Suns game, not allowed. I'm pretty sure it's on the back of a ticket that you're not allowed to breastfeed. Your cans hanging out. Yeah, you can't have your cans. Although, even without breastfeeding at the Lakers and Clippers games, the audience has a lot more skin showing. Last night it was like 12 degrees. I don't even know what the temperature was outside. Raining. I'd never seen more half shirts and boobs out. The chicks for Clippers and Lakers games. I don't know what it is, but.

[Brady Bogan]

They should have it, like, set up smoking areas. But they're breastfeeding stations.

[John Holmberg]

Sure. You know, wall.

[Brady Bogan]

And you can, you know, there's a monitor. You can watch the game.

[John Holmberg]

Sure. You know what that's called? Called the bathroom. The bathroom stall. They've got that. They've got those. Just take it. The kid is not going to starve to death. From the walk from section. I'm guessing 205, 206, something way up there, Row Z. You walk all the way to the bathroom and you pop yourself into a stall and you lock it in. He'll be fine. From the walk from your terrible seats into the bathrooms in the upper deck. I'm positive. I'm positive the kid will live. I'm positive. If Bulbul's still alive, I don't think that guy's eating. Like last night during the game, he was in there so long in the second half, I halfway expected a plane to go over and drop some food on the guy. It was like the longest I've ever seen someone that thin play a game. Mobile. I'm all about seeing cans, just like the next guy. Except if there's a kid hanging on it, then I don't really want to see it. So I don't want your kid that can't walk at the game in the first place. I don't understand that. Disneyland sporting events. The people in front of me are really super nice. They've been their season tickets the last three years, and they're there again this year. And they had a kid with them.

[Brady Bogan]

And yeah, they were there the time.

[John Holmberg]

That I sat there the last time. They've gotten a new kid, too, but.

[Brady Bogan]

There'S a real young one.

[John Holmberg]

And then, yeah, there's an older one now. They had to buy him a seat a couple years ago, but the first year or so, two years ago. And last year, he got to sit on mom's lap. If he ever got a little bit bouncy, she'd go, but for the most part, you didn't even notice it. But the reason why is because they had season tickets. And it would have been an awful lot to go get, you know, sitters every time. So I'm like, all right, I get it. But also, if the kid. And they didn't come to every game because they're like, he was nuts. He went crazy. So they give him to her dad or whatever, and then he'd sit there and got to know all of them. And it was. It's nice. But I. I still don't understand taking a kid who's like one or two and having that thing plop down on your lap. It doesn't make sense to me. Disneyland for kids who can't ride the rides. I don't know why you pay the fee. I don't. But if he was free the whole.

[Brady Bogan]

Time, could you imagine on a, you know, a playoff game, you have to get up and get out of your seat and miss.

[John Holmberg]

She handled it, man. That was great. But if you've got. You got a baby with you at a son's game. How about in the car? The Uber. Uber. Whatever you took in there, you whip that thing out, give him a little meal before the game. You're the most hated man in Uber history now. Those guys are like, come on, man. Really? If you're willing to whip out with the, with, with Uber driver, if you know Vader, who we know well, is driving you to the Suns game and he's not going to complain one bit if you're breastfeeding that. I think he probably watches those videos. Yeah, he's probably. That's. He's probably got a camera on for that reason.

[Brady Bogan]

He's got a pump.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, for sure. Do you need help? I've got my own. I've been milking my own. But yeah, so feed it before the game.

[Brady Bogan]

You know, it doesn't make three hours or so.

[John Holmberg]

I don't know.

[Brady Bogan]

Every three hours schedule. Is that right when they're first born?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, this thing he said was the.

[John Holmberg]

Baby was standing up.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, he should be fine.

[John Holmberg]

He can wake, you know, if he wants the biddy. If he starts tapping on the biddy, if he can say biddy, then he can't have it until you say so. And you don't need to whip out for a kid who can walk. No. So everybody, Victor, everybody in your section was correct for saying, hey, lady, take it somewhere else because, come on, carry it around.

[Brady Bogan]

I know you know my friend Jill, her dad was a doctor back in the day when they'd go on road trips.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Girls want to go to the Magic Kingdom. Benadryl. It was a four or five hour road trip.

[John Holmberg]

You drug your children. It's a better time.

[Brady Bogan]

We go to the Magic Kingdom.

[John Holmberg]

It was a better time. You drug them and you put them.

[Brady Bogan]

To sleep and wake up, hey, they're at grandma's house.

[John Holmberg]

They'll make it. Here's the defense for the breastfeeding woman who's just. And breastfeeding. Ladies, you're just trying to stir it up. If you're doing it at a son's game or in public, you're just trying to See if you can get a reaction. Here's what my 2024 proclamation is. I'm staring, I'm pointing, making noises. I'm not gonna say, you can't do it. I'm just gonna be like, oh. And she'll say, what are you looking at? And I'll say, you're exposed. What? That's right. It's natural. It's beautiful. Can't get enough of it. What we need to do is, man.

[Brady Bogan]

Put the selfie ring up and do it over the shoulder like you're going live.

[John Holmberg]

Just film it. So beautiful, so natural. Use their argument against them. Oh, it's the most. I want to put this all over the Internet because it's so. You're so brave. Stop it. I thought that's the point here, everybody. Breastfeeding Cam, we need to use the argument against. When it starts to happen in the restaurant, whip out the camera and just go, amazing. So brave.

[Brady Bogan]

What are you doing?

[John Holmberg]

I'm filming you in all your natural beauty. Quit it. You'll turn it on them and they'll knock it off because nobody wants to see it.

[Brady Bogan]

How's the food tonight?

[John Holmberg]

What is he getting, Italian? Because we're all at. It's nice. Yo, I'm filming this. Stare, moan, point. Just. Oh, don't make it sexual. Just tell him how beautiful and natural it is. That is so brave. I am on your side, sister. And just stare the whole time. This guy's creeping me out. No, you're creeping everybody out. And breastfeeding at a son's game. Come on. You're doing that just to get a rise out of folks. That's it. There's no reason you couldn't have taken that into a stall. I didn't want to miss this. 20 point. Definitely it. You're not missing anything. I would have loved to have breastfeeding all around me last night. That game was a drag. I don't ever leave basketball games early. My buddy Mark sitting next to me, turns, he goes, you want to get out of here? I'm like, yeah. And then they start coming back. I'm like, maybe it was us. They didn't do anything about, you know, getting within 10. But the best. The kid in front of me, probably 10, and his hot mom was next to him and all that. All we watched that kid do is just. And another high five for no kids was he was eating noodles. I don't even know where you get noodles, but he got noodles somewhere. Brady would know, because who eats noodles at a sporting event? But he had A bowl of vegetables and noodles, and he's sucking them out of this thing like lady and the Tramp style by himself. And they fall out of his mouth and onto the armrest. And he'd pick them up and eat them off the armrest. I'm like, all right. These things are. No wonder ball pits are AIDS disease, you know, little holes of yuck. And Covid, he didn't care that stuff fell on the sporting event on the armrest of the chair. His mom's like, man, what are you gonna do? These things are.

[Brady Bogan]

Don't waste a noodle.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. No. Then he. Then he didn't like him, so it ended up under his seat. And I'm watching that just going, ugh. Now, had that little guy started to breastfeed on his mom standing. So brave. So beautiful. So beautiful. That's our defense fence. Now we got to stop. And to you people who get fired up about it, don't say anything like, she needs to move. Don't say, get on her team. And this will this. Women are good about this because they always do the opposite of what? Like, it's the whole thing. When Lena Dunham started taking her clothes off on girls, big, fat, ugly woman started getting naked all the time, and you couldn't say, yuck, big, fat, ugly woman in front of your wife.

[Brady Bogan]

Especially brave.

[John Holmberg]

Right? Right. So then you have to turn it into, you know, so brave, but the like, because that's what women were doing. So then you turn it on them, because it was only women were saying that. Seeing Lizzo and Caitlyn Jenner. Remember when Caitlyn Jenner was beautiful? And everybody's like, oh, my God, she's just living her true self again. Use them as an example. Your wife comes out of the bathroom in lingerie and just go, oh, my God. You've never looked more like Lizzo ever before. So beautiful, so brave. And she'll be pissed because deep down, she knows she's just trying to get a rise out of a dude. Get on their side, and they'll swing back to life logic. This breastfeeding thing that's popped up a couple times already. It's the fourth of the year, and it's the second breastfeeding story I've heard. Get on their side. Film it. Stare at them. Tell them how wonderful it is. Yuck. You're weird. You're the one. You're the one with your out and a person attached to it. I'm the weirdo.

[Brady Bogan]

Could you imagine 30 cell phones just.

[John Holmberg]

Just immediately beautiful? Look at the beauty. Yeah. Make it seem like you. It's a sunset, that. It's a triple rainbow. Just film it and tell them how wonderful it is. They'll be in bathroom stalls in a day. I loved it before everybody started filming it. Perverts. We're not sexualizing it. You're the one that said it was wonderful. We agreed.

[Brady Bogan]

Wait for it. When they finish, there's a green flash.

[John Holmberg]

If you're lucky, you get to see the Aurora booby. Alice. There it is. I can't do it. Just encouraging it. Encourage it. It'll go away faster. It won't encourage it. Like, women won't be comfortable with it if we act like we like it. You know, that the second dudes get on board. I'm not that good of an actor.

[Brady Bogan]

Swinging off a can.

[John Holmberg]

You need to let me handle it. And you're like, look, I gotta turn away. I can't do this.

[Brady Bogan]

Get your phone up.

[John Holmberg]

Just. Yeah, just act like you're doing something with it. And, you know, watch the game. It'll go away in a week. It'll stop. Look at Barbie, for God's sakes. Women went nuts screaming that Barbie was the worst thing in the world, and it caused them all to puke up their food and everything. And guys are like, what, are you nuts? It's a doll. Finally, we're like, all right, maybe Barbie's bad, and that's it. So then, like, well, here's a movie about her. She's the greatest thing of all time. Like, wait a second. You guys hated her. And when we came around and said, fine, Barbie's no good. Don't buy them for daughters anymore. You made a movie, and she's the most empowering female figure of all time without any middle. It just went from we hate Barbie to Barbie's the greatest. And it's because when guys said, all right, fine, whatever.

[Brady Bogan]

It's true. If we agree.

[John Holmberg]

Right? Right. If we agree to it, they turn and go, what are you guys so agreeable for? Breastfeeding. Trust me, we can fix this. If the big booty girl isn't adding breast meat milk to my coffee at Starbucks, I don't want it. Christian, that is not an option at Starbucks. This one says ladies who breastfeed. If it's so natural, then why are you wearing a shirt and bra? Just go topless, walk down a sidewalk in downtown Phoenix and see how long it takes to get a ticket for indecent exposure. Very true. I agree. But in order to combat that, walk down the street without a shirt And a bra with a baby attached to your can. And you don't get a ticket because you're feeding the kid. You're like, then we have a law.

[Brady Bogan]

That was passed or some states, technically you could. Women can now.

[John Holmberg]

Well, just want to run. Yeah. There's a thing where you can go shirtless. Yeah. If you wanna. New York had it. I know that. And the worst examples of who you'd want to do that. We're walking down the street, the four.

[Brady Bogan]

Wheaties crowd that are trying to encourage that.

[John Holmberg]

Loads of Rachel Maddows took their shirts off and started walking around New York York City. And like, no, no, no. When we passed this law, we didn't mean you guys should do it. The good ones. But the good ones know to keep the game alive, the cat and mouse has to stay nipples away. Guys have to fight to see it. You have to buy a couple of meals or maybe, you know, be a little bit charming. Yeah. When the, when your wife says, oh my God. When you make fun of Lizzo and she's on. You're just so judgmental. You know, body shamings are. Okay, fine. The next time your wife. Wife says, do I look fat in these jeans? Just say, you look like Lizzo in those jeans. What are you talking about? Oh, you look so beautiful. Why? Why? I thought we all thought she was gorgeous. You don't anymore. Oh, when I compare you to the. Oh, I see. It's only beautiful when I say she's pro. She is because she is and they know it. They're just trying to get a rise out of you because they know if they don't say that, you'll start looking at the real pretty ones. They don't like that. That's why that body positivity happened in the first place. Ladies who weren't trying anymore noticed that their men were looking at women that didn't look anything like them. They can achieve the Lizzo look. That's easy. They can't achieve the, you know, the Olivia Culpo. That's tough. That's hard work. So if a guy's looking at Olivia Culpo, you're wife will be like, yuck, you're a pervert. That's not what real women look like. It's the big battle cry. Yeah, it's easy to look like Lizzo. I could do that. Give me till July. I could be Lizzo. It wouldn't be hard at all. Says there's a California. Of course California has a thing. It says it gives women the right to breastfeed their child in a public place. Protection is needed since women breastfeeding in a public place may be asked to stop, leave or cover up. Causing embarrassment and stigmatization. That's right. Don't stigmatize it when they do. Must be a mother when they do it. Just start going, oh, God. Thank you for this beautiful gift you've given me. California. My Arizona. I tell you what. No. Bring those laws here. It'll go away. Follow my law here. Make it willy nilly crazy. And the ladies will stop immediately once we start saying it's great.

[Brady Bogan]

The bill has passed. You no longer film breastfeeding.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's what they'll do. Like. Stop it. You perverts. Like you're the one sexualizing it. I was following your words. It's a gorgeous act. I can't get enough of it. And when a woman in nature does what comes naturally. I'm filming it. You're weird. All right. I guess you should probably take that into the bathroom because it's too much beauty for me to handle. I gotta look at it. You'll see it. Scott, stop. It will go away because it is weird. But the guys who start saying it like the dude last night. Isn't there a better place for this? You just opened her can. Not like. You know what I mean?

[Brady Bogan]

I can do this everywhere.

[John Holmberg]

It's natural. This may be about that. All you had to do. All you had to do to change that is just go. Thank you for doing this. Thank you. Don't say anything sexual. Don't make it weird. Just lean down. Just. Thank you so much for being so brave. So beautiful. Folks are. My God. Thank you for doing this with us. What? Feeding that baby in front of me. God damn it. Excellent work. Good mumming. I'm getting out of here. That guy's a pervert. Right? We all know what you're doing. I could stop this feminist nonsense in two seconds. Agree with them as a man. What they do is hate men. And the second they got dudes, normal dudes like us on their side, they'll quit it. They'll quit it immediately. Trust me.

[Brady Bogan]

You stand up, you start dancing immediately. Flagging now. Trying to get any camera on you.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

Network coverage.

[John Holmberg]

You've got to see this. Everyone gather around. There's a beautiful natural event happening. This lady's breath. Why are you doing that? Because it's awesome. I'm getting out of here. Oh, it's too bad. Go hide now. Aren't you? And to the ladies who do it with that big jump giant Sheet.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

And you covered it up. Classy. Good on you. But any lady that wants to start doing it in public, you're gonna meet the wrath of the homebird clan and.

[Brady Bogan]

You'Re gonna be hiding underneath here.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's great. Oh, you said pipes get a little sea of that. Oh, that's nice. Yeah. Don't make it sexual. Don't get all weird. Just tell them, thank you so much for doing this. So. This is so beautiful and natural. Especially if you're a stranger at a sons came out of. Tapped her right on the shoulder. Thank you. Thank you for this. Thank you for being so brave. Use their words, they'll spin. They'll get the hell out of it.

[Brady Bogan]

Then this guy tapped me on the.

[John Holmberg]

Shoulder and said how brave I was and it was beautiful. Isn't that what you say? Yeah, but I don't need to. All I want is somebody mad at.

[Brady Bogan]

Me so I can fight back.

[John Holmberg]

That's exactly how you.

[Brady Bogan]

They'll immediately stop, I think too if you turn. Turn the camera sound up on your phone. What?

[John Holmberg]

I didn't give you permission to photograph me. I'm just. It's so natural. It's like being David Attenborough. It's like Planet Earth 4, the big blue planet. Look at this. Nature edits nature's work. Like me. It's like taking a picture of a bobcat in a tree. You're just being nature. You're doing your thing.

[Brady Bogan]

The blue footed booby.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, they'll be up there and their stalls going, I can't do it anymore. The guys like it now. Just don't make it dirty boys, that's all. Use their words, it'll go away. Sorry you had that experience at the Sun's game. I was busy watching Bobo last night thinking, man, if I could draw Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. The best of hombre's morning sickness. I'm Maddie Akupd, the host, the man, the myth, the legend of Fear Factor. He's here right now. Mr. Joe Rogan. What's up, man? How you doing? How are you? What's happening? Good to see you. We thought you're here only for a day. You're here the whole weekend? Yeah, I'm here Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. All right. So you're here all weekend. You're here for the perfect camping out.

[Brady Bogan]

Moving here, bringing a posse in. They're coming in right now sans posse.

[John Holmberg]

That was the best way to catch me. You can't get your posse comes. I'm just Gonna show off and pretend.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm a different person.

[John Holmberg]

But for now, people open doors and get me water. You gotta play lights with lightweight because it's just you. And I'm filming a DVD down here. Oh, cool. So that's. That's why mom here to do comedy, But I'm here to film a DVD of the comedy. So there's a bunch of people here that's all film crew. So you got the whole thing going on now. You're gonna start during the show.

[Brady Bogan]

You might go, stop. Cut.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, this is. I almost swore. Rewind it. Yeah, but you got. So you got the dvd. When is that coming out? When it's done. We have to edit it, so it'll be a couple months, but. Sweet. But we're filming it Friday and Saturday. Now, I know you're rolling in dough right now, but could you do me a favor and please tell bucks every. Well, I do. That's next, but I want to do that off there. I don't want to make you uncomfortable. Thank you. Every channel in this city shows Fear Factor. It's out of hand. I'm home early. I watch a lot of weird tv, and there it is. I turn it from here, turn it to there, and you're on constant. That's not my fault. A little bit, though. Not really. And I don't get paid for those either. You don't? Not really. You get a little bit. Tiny bit. It's after. So it's a. You're just getting the chunk for the reruns. You're not getting anything for the reruns. It's a tiny amount. It's a real small amount. Yeah. As much as that's on. You need to sue somebody, then. No, no. It's just the way it goes. Just. No one ever expected that to happen with reality tv. They expected it only with, like, sitcoms.

[Brady Bogan]

The other thing I didn't realize is you walk around with this giant jar of cockroaches, which is cool.

[John Holmberg]

It's just in case. Well, you know, people always want to eat something, so I'm just like, hey, you got.

[Brady Bogan]

You want to eat something?

[John Holmberg]

I got sick of that. Like, people, dude. It's the worst. Like, that's the. They all. They all think they're being original. What do you got for me to eat? Come in. You got original. Like, oh, this is not gonna go away. This is gonna be with me for the rest of my life. You're gonna be, like, crazy.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll eat anything.

[John Holmberg]

I'm gonna be 90 trying to play Golf. Yeah. Some old man's gonna come up to me. I almost got on your show once, hit him in the head with a knot. You get the n. You get the people that just constantly tell you that they almost were on Fear Factor.

[Brady Bogan]

No, I'm trying out for your show.

[John Holmberg]

I'm trying out for your show. But, you know, the best thing is I tell them. I go, well, you know what? If you talk to me, you can't.

[Brady Bogan]

Ever be on the show because the.

[John Holmberg]

FCC rules and they leave you alone. They leave me alone. Pure brilliance right there. You know, there's. You know, you start in with a Hollis, because Dave Chappelle just went into a mental rehab in South Africa. Yeah, he's in South Africa. In South Africa, you might go to mental rehab. Either I'm crazy or they're crazy. So let's get this checked out right now for going to South Africa when he's making 50 million in LA. Well, Africa is cool, man. I want to go to Africa. I want to watch some animals kill their animals. I want to watch it happen live. You know, you do it on every Monday. Monday. No, not really. Sort of. I would like to go, wouldn't you like to watch a lion take out a gazelle?

[Brady Bogan]

That could be a new Fear Factor thing. You strap some, like, fresh meat on someone, they have to run through the. There you go.

[John Holmberg]

The problem is, even the wild lions, like, when you go to safaris, they're not even wild anymore because they're used to seeing people. Yeah, it's not like that's the first Jeep.

[Brady Bogan]

I had some neighbors that just got back from South Africa, and that's exactly. They were in the car. You know, lions are just eating the carcass right next to the.

[John Holmberg]

Well, they have the one where you feed them. What's the point of that? The one where you're just tossing them food and, oh, this is amazing. No, you can't do that. It's not right. You gotta watch them get their own. So you're just basically feed the lives. Really, that's the whole point of. I'm with you. Is just watching Take Down a Gazelle. That's the only reason those shows on National Geographic get me. And I'll watch the first 30 minutes to learn about the animal. I'm not paying attention just to watch them take something out. I wonder how long they have to film something to catch. Like, you ever watch like that.

[Brady Bogan]

There's one crazy footage you see over.

[John Holmberg]

And over, over again of this crocodile exploding out of the water, taking out this Wildebeest. Oh, it's so sick.

[Brady Bogan]

It's like this 300 pound wildebeest, this.

[John Holmberg]

Thing just goes flying through the air.

[Brady Bogan]

The crocodile's like 20ft long, grass.

[John Holmberg]

And the cameraman understanding for like days and days.

[Brady Bogan]

I don't know.

[John Holmberg]

Those crocs, yeah, it's pretty common. Those are dinosaurs, dude.

[Brady Bogan]

The wildebeest, they cross every year, so they have a fever.

[John Holmberg]

He's big on the animals. This is where. This is where you made a mistake. Steak. You and me, my friend. Real talk, you know, smoke adobe and talk about this. It'll be like having a limo driver in your ear all day long.

[Brady Bogan]

I picked up a fer de lance, man. It bit my friend.

[John Holmberg]

What? What the hell are you talking about? This is what I'm saying. Look what you've started. Stop calling my cell phone. So what are you doing? Hey, Joe, it's Brady. I'm back. That's all you're gonna hear constantly. Hi, thanks for the number.

[Brady Bogan]

Hey, I got a great thing for you to.

[John Holmberg]

You'll be bird watching with him before you know it. Just drunk. Why are we doing this again? Yeah, but. So you, what do you do with your free time? You. Do you have any free time anymore? You're right. Oh yeah, I got plenty of free time. Really? Well, yeah. I mean, what I really like to do is stand up. I mean, when I'm not doing Fear Factor, that's what I mostly do, right. And the only reason why I do anything else besides stand up is for money. Seriously, stand up is really what I love to do. It's just, you know, when you're a stand up, they offer you other stuff and that's how I got on television in the first place, you know, but.

[Brady Bogan]

When you start in Fear Factor, did you have to relocate?

[John Holmberg]

No, no, I lived in la. Yeah, it's all. Most of it's done in la and occasionally we shoot like a show in.

[Brady Bogan]

New York or Vegas or something like that.

[John Holmberg]

But most of it's la. Yeah, but that's it. So it's just stand up and then everything else is a heartless attempt to grab a check. Yeah, everything else, financially, yeah, that's great. There's nothing wrong with that. I appreciate that. No, most people, I could just for the love of acting. You know what? You know, there's something about hosting that really just touches my soul. So you just rolled through Newsradio. Three, two, one, go. There's just something about it.

[Brady Bogan]

So what about the UFC thing?

[John Holmberg]

I've done martial arts since I was a little Kid. So, you know, I've always been, you know, a big fan of fighting. And I don't even really like other sports. I mean, I. I can't. I don't watch basketball. I just. I can't get behind it. I don't understand it. I mean, your ball's going in the net. Who cares? Ball went in that. Whoa. That ball in the net too. Well, that's crazy. Throw a ball went in the net.

[Brady Bogan]

Whoa.

[John Holmberg]

The ball actually went in the net. That's incredible.

[Brady Bogan]

It's a non event.

[John Holmberg]

See, the only time it's an event is when there's like some artificial significance attached to it. Like a world title, you know, three seconds to go.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, but a fight is a fight.

[John Holmberg]

You know, I'm saying like there's always. It's always exciting. You know, when two dudes are locked in a cage and they're ready to brain each other.

[Brady Bogan]

There's something.

[John Holmberg]

You're kind of like me. If it's. If it's not bleeding, it ain't entertainment. Hollow. Yeah, see, that's what I'm talking about, girl. I want excitement, man. When you look, I watch a basketball game and I'll be bored until a fight breaks out in the basketball court.

[Brady Bogan]

And then I'm gonna be the first.

[John Holmberg]

Person standing up going, oh, that's exciting.

[Brady Bogan]

That's reality. The ufc. The last one, it's hilarious because you're going crazy. Yeah, you can't help it. But which one?

[John Holmberg]

With Randy Couture Chocolate. Yeah. That was insane. Yeah. Which is a great. And I swear to God, you're gonna just kill the heavyweight boxing completely. Which is about time somebody did. Yeah, you watch that, James? Tony. Oh, you can't watch.

[Brady Bogan]

He just got ripped away way.

[John Holmberg]

He just got caught with steroids 10 days, 10 days after and he. With, you know, a wateroids in there. I mean, when's he using? I'm a doctor, I don't. I prescribe, get a wad going. You know, it's funny.

[Brady Bogan]

And that's what's good about the UFC is it's.

[John Holmberg]

They're all on roids. We love that. No, they get tested too, actually, with a lot of. A lot of people have been stripped of the ufc. Look, you know, they need an all roids sport because look how boring baseball is now. Why is everybody yelling with the door open?

[Brady Bogan]

I could have swore we were on the radio.

[John Holmberg]

Who's this guy? This is Chuck Artigi, runs the place. Oh, Chuck's in here. Chuck's yellow with the radio on. Yeah, he's just happy to meet. Doesn't even realize the radio show's going on. Talking about his golf game this morning. Chuck wants to. Chuck wants to be on elderly Fear Factor. That's a possibility. Tons of Metamucil and we'll just fire it off into buckets. That's all I'm looking to do. Yeah, he's big into that stuff. So when is the UFC thing? Is that weekly now or what's going on? Well, what they're doing now is they're gonna have a whole bunch of new shows on Spike TV where they have live UFC's. They're gonna have six in the next 12 months and then there's gonna be a bunch of pay per view cards. The next pay per view one is June 4th in Atlantic City.

[Brady Bogan]

I never really watched that show. The week to week one where their training where the.

[John Holmberg]

The ultimate fighters. Great show.

[Brady Bogan]

It's a great show.

[John Holmberg]

The final. The. The final steroids. He's on a water boys finale was awesome. You know they had a live finale on Spike tv. It was. It was sick. It was crazy. I just. I love it. I can't get enough of it because it's real fighting. You're right. You know, some of those guys are on steroids. We can't lie about it. You know it. And then you know what? All the athletes are. Lance Armstrong's on steroids. They're all famous for it. They're famous for it. Nothing wrong with it, I don't think. If you want to shrink your balls for my entertainment, then I'm all for that. I think it's a phenomenal. Plus you bleed easier. Yeah. Yeah. More doctor talk. Yeah, I'm just. I'm just like. I don't want to get too technical.

[Brady Bogan]

But extra blood they got cut their.

[John Holmberg]

Arms fall off their organs and stuff. Some of the greatest events in history have been due to steroids. And that's. It thrills me, guys. Arms. Well, breaking and plopping off and weightlifting. There's some sports that they're not. I mean like you got. Look, if you're gonna test sports, test all sports.

[Brady Bogan]

I mean, how do you think football.

[John Holmberg]

Players get to be £350? Yeah. That's not normal for a human. No. Okay, one more. Humans.

[Brady Bogan]

£350 for the 1900s.

[John Holmberg]

She never existed. £350 of solid muscle until they figured out you could take stuff out of organs and stick it in your body. That never happened.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, they were doing that, but not for that reason. Years ago.

[John Holmberg]

What were they doing?

[Brady Bogan]

Taking Organs out and stick them in your body. Yeah. Indians would take your intestines out. You run around a tree. It's a torture.

[John Holmberg]

Way too much western.

[Brady Bogan]

I. I watched a. Oh, man.

[John Holmberg]

Just get ready here.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, it was on the Internet, man.

[John Holmberg]

You. You believe that you. That Indians would tear your intestines out, make you run around a tree? Yeah, I think that's impossible.

[Brady Bogan]

With your 27ft, baby.

[John Holmberg]

Your intestines are out and you can still manage to run around. They beat you with a stick if you don't run. Chief. I'm done. Now what they also take.

[Brady Bogan]

They also take evil claws and elevate you.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, I know that one. Yeah, that's easy. Eagle clothes.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

I thought these like hooks, man.

[Brady Bogan]

Called horse.

[John Holmberg]

Remember that?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Those are eagle claws.

[Brady Bogan]

The eagles were endangered.

[John Holmberg]

He's like a little kid that just got out like a civics class. Nice.

[Brady Bogan]

Not anymore. Bald eagles are back. They're like pigeons now, people.

[John Holmberg]

You know they found a new rodent. Did you know that?

[Brady Bogan]

No.

[John Holmberg]

They found a new, entirely new species of rodent today. And playmates will be eating Monday. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. I don't know. Some new rodent they just found, like Indonesia or something. Really? Yeah, it's. It's like. It looks like a. Like a guinea pig. And it's got a long furry tail. Look in the drudge report. Wow. All right.

[Brady Bogan]

We have. The rare thing that we have out here is a jackalope.

[John Holmberg]

What is that?

[Brady Bogan]

It's a cross between a jackrab and an antelope. It's a rabbit with horns.

[John Holmberg]

Really nice.

[Brady Bogan]

They have mirror in Wyoming and Arizona.

[John Holmberg]

Making that up too. There's people looking that up online right now. Jack alone.

[Brady Bogan]

Have you heard of the cabin?

[John Holmberg]

No.

[Brady Bogan]

The cat and rabbit.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that makes sense.

[Brady Bogan]

It's on the Internet.

[John Holmberg]

Some cat and rabbit together. That is sexy. Screw that safari thing. I want to watch that go down. I want to see this new rodent. It's on the Drudge report. We can't find it. We'll find it. Not yet, but that's pretty cool. Gotta kill the pop up window, man. Yeah, the pop up windows. That's all we got. Pop up killer. You gotta get Firefox at you.

[Brady Bogan]

You got the cut. The cut?

[John Holmberg]

We just got the cut. Heather. The heavy Heather came in. Well, thank you for having me on. Not a problem. Like I said at the 10pm Prov, all week, Thursday, Friday, Saturday and Sunday. But Friday and Saturday, if you want to heckle and get on the DVD and. No, don't do that. I'm just kidding. Friday night is easy. There's a brand new, brand new 20 minute chunk in Joe's act of limo driver jokes. Jackalope is fantastic.

[Brady Bogan]

The limo driver jokes limo drivers, jackalopes.

[John Holmberg]

And cabin station manager managers who open the door and have massive conversations while you're on the radio. Come on. He's old. He can't even hear us.

[Brady Bogan]

He didn't even know it's right here.

[John Holmberg]

There you go. You can see Joe Rogan 24 hours a day on every channel, on every station ever. Satellite, cable, doesn't matter what you got. Thanks for coming, man. Appreciate it. Joe Rogan right there. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. The best of the morning sickness is on the air. Do any of you people do any actual work? The best of Holmberg's morning sickness. This segment is brought to you guys by Action Ride Shop.

[Brady Bogan]

Now if you're thinking about heading up.

[John Holmberg]

North to hit the slopes for some skiing, some boarding, or if you're just gonna stay down here in the valley and do some mountain biking, Action Ride Shop is your, your place to be. They got all the gear and all the knowledge you're gonna need. So check them out [e-mail] or better.

[Brady Bogan]

Yet, just go visit them over there.

[John Holmberg]

On Gilbert Road and Southern. It's Action Ride Shop. Before I do that, I got a lot of response yesterday about Waymos because I was talking about riding in the ghost cars. I didn't realize how afraid. And I'm not kidding when I say of the 30 responses that I I got for talking about Waymo, 28 of them were all when the terrorists get hold of these cars and bash you into a tree, I won't feel bad kind of stuff. And I'm like, wow, okay, well until then, I'm gonna enjoy Waymo I they literally the fear of the driverless car has become terror related.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, mostly I'd never heard that one. I've just heard. I mean majority of I thought would be along this lines that I just don't like the fact I'm not in control.

[John Holmberg]

Oh yeah, well sure, that's just a human thing, but I mean as far as like being truly afraid of it.

[Brady Bogan]

Now another curve too.

[John Holmberg]

Well, not even a curve. This is a completely different lane. Like you, you were worried that that's the angle they're gonna go is to take over the cars and bash us all into trees. Maybe, but I mean wouldn't it take like all sorts of like it would take a lot if you look at the map, Waymo doesn't drive anywhere but like for. From the 101 over to 7th street and kind of between the 10 and Lincoln. I think we're safe for a while at the very least until they, you know, I don't know. They're not even allowed on freeways. How much damage could they do?

[Brady Bogan]

I find myself disappointed now when I look over. Oh, there's a way more. Oh, there's a dude in it.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, you want totally monitoring or whatever. None of that, man. You've got to find by my house. There's. You're out in Gilbert. There's still. Well, I just.

[Brady Bogan]

I thought they would all be, you know, man, let's.

[John Holmberg]

Basically, they're starting to test them on the freeways because you see Waymos with dudes on the freeways. But that's the. The little map. But I. I couldn't believe how paranoid everybody is. I'd never ride one of those in K. I mean, how. How important do you think you are that the Waymo. What are the odds you're in a Waymo when the terrorists take over? I mean, for them to have it be beneficial, wouldn't it have to be.

[Brady Bogan]

Like running into a tree?

[John Holmberg]

Wouldn't it have to be all the cars? Right? And then once. Once you kind of notice, oh, the waymos are mashing into trees. This attack ends relatively quickly unless they wait until all of us are in waymos, which someday may occur. That everything's autonomous. And that to me is. A guy emailed and said this is the plan to me is that in 10 years they're going to make cars hard to buy. And millennials don't want to buy cars as it is now anyway. They don't have to get insurance. You don't have to do any of this other stuff. And Waymos will be like, you can get like a. A group deal or some sort of a. It was a. It was a good theory to say this is the quickest way to get people away from buying their own thing. And on some sort of government program of driving. It's almost like always have to have a city pass, you know? So one of the. I'm like, that's not a bad thought. But we'd all have to be in Waymos for that to be an effective terrorist thing. Because they just start bashing one or two into the. Nobody cares. That's the reason why airlines that like jsx, they can go without security because they're like, all right, terrorists. If you're going to take this one down. There's 20 people on it. Good. Go get them. Like, terrorists aren't going to start crashing small. It doesn't seem to be like, I don't think that's a big win for them. And then the one guy emailed me and said, yeah, you know what they're going to do? Is the terrorist going to take over? You'll be in your Waymo, and they're just going to drive. Drive it into a parade or a pile of people or something. First off, if the parade is blocking Central Avenue, I'm not against it. I want to get to Windsor by noon. I. I can't tolerate parades and that Fiesta bowl parade if you're taking out a marching band. All right, well, that's not so bad to me. I. Oops. Waymo went out of control. But I don't think terrorists are looking at us that way. It was a weird fear, and it was a lot of emails about it, a lot. Some tongue in cheek. But a lot of people were truly like, oh, you never catch me in one of those. Like, that's weird. That is sort of that fear of when, you know, movies used to be shown to the first crowds and they would run from them because there were people on the sides of walls that were 20ft tall. And it's that fear of the advancement of technology. If you're afraid of Waymo, you should be afraid of airplanes. But think about people more than anything.

[Brady Bogan]

Else, let alone the TV or your.

[John Holmberg]

Computer monitor, your house.

[Brady Bogan]

You're being watched.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. The Alexa, the television, your. Your phone. You're emailing me. That's something. I mean, access to you is a lot more than a Waymo. And again, first Waymo I hear gets taken over by another guy and into a tree. I'm off. Wh o for a little while. You know, just go, all right, straighten that bug out. And then maybe. But it is a pretty awesome thing.

[Brady Bogan]

That's what you did with Tik Tok. You heard the Chinese. It was.

[John Holmberg]

That was my big fear. I started practicing my dances, and I was doing the choreography. I'm like, all right, I'm ready for tick to Chinese. Wha. And of course, I didn't do it because I didn't want the Chinese to watch me dance. I didn't know that wasn't it. But again, I'm basically taking Waymo from my house within like, a mile or two of something else.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, that was to try it out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. I love it. I'm a fan. Hooked. But if you smash me Into a tree. I mean, I could do that in a cat. Like, most cabbies are terrorists. Like, I. Like, why do I trust that dude not to do it? Why do I not trust that, you know, Uber hires 700 Al Qaedas and we don't even know it, and they're just driving around for a year, and then on. On an organized day, all the Ubers go into trees.

[Brady Bogan]

That's just to test your bigotry.

[John Holmberg]

Is it? I'm immediately a bigot when I get in the car. That's the music to the Windsor.

[Brady Bogan]

Please.

[John Holmberg]

If I hear like that. What. What are we listening to? Is there going to be a cobra coming out of a bucket? It's not. So I'm really in the car and I smell curry. I'm out. Right? I'm just not. I'm not doing it. Steph Curry. Which is weird. What's this? Oh, yo, is it cars blowing up? Is there an Uber? Was that an Uber? Yeah, I just. I thought it was an irrational fear, but understandable that you're afraid that technology can be hacked. But, I mean, an airplane is probably more technologically your car.

[Brady Bogan]

Talk about computer run. Oh, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Like General Motors and. Well, I don't know if it's General motors. They have OnStar, right? And mine has Uconnect sync sync board. Yeah. And they can get on your car right now and do that. But I'd be more afraid of the. The loony driver that has had a bad day that I'm in an Uber with. But whatever. Have your own fears. I have mine, you have yours. The Waymo thing wasn't bad. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. All this show with none of the fluff. Let's get started. There's more of the Best of Homburg's Morning Sickness. You're listening to the Best of Homburg's Morning Sickness, and you might have heard a little bit of me, Frank Caliente there, who, by the way, just happens to be at the Desert Ridge Improv.

[Brady Bogan]

January 31st and February 1st. Desertridgeimprov.com or something.

[John Holmberg]

You sons of. Now back to the Best of Holmberg's Morning Sickness.

[Brady Bogan]

My mom was visiting, right, for the holiday. She comes home. She leaves on the 27th. It wasn't her. But she gets back to Columbus. Her car shows stolen the day that she got back from the house. From her place. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Where she's kidding.

[Brady Bogan]

And so she calls me out, my car got stolen. Like, well, you know, it's a Lincoln. I go, mom, you can call Lincoln and they can track your car VIN number and all that. Okay, do that tomorrow.

[John Holmberg]

Did they get it? Yes. You didn't care?

[Brady Bogan]

Well, she had an officer working the case, right. And he calls her back the next day and says yeah, we've got highway footage of the people and they were able to get in close enough to see to identify the driver. 16 year old kid. And there's two people in the back. They couldn't see the two people in the back, but the officer says they're probably just joyriding your car. The good news is she had. The reason why I was out front of her place is she had a flat and the space saver was on so she's waiting for AAA to pick up.

[John Holmberg]

So we're not getting far on that.

[Brady Bogan]

So they're trolling around the highway with a flat Lincoln.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

So she, she got it back. But a 16 year old kid and two 20 year old females.

[John Holmberg]

Your mom's pressing charges, right?

[Brady Bogan]

She hasn't decided.

[John Holmberg]

Oh Brady, come on. Jesus. She's done. Well by Jesus, this is not. She doesn't need these last minute reprieves here.

[Brady Bogan]

But the kid said he had no idea. He didn't think the car was stolen because the ladies told him there. Will you drive us to these places?

[John Holmberg]

So the broads jack the car, is that what. That's what he's saying? Bull. Wow.

[Brady Bogan]

No, he's not saying he didn't know the car was jacked. He thought it was one of theirs.

[John Holmberg]

Well that's what then he's claiming that they stole it.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, maybe they don't know either.

[John Holmberg]

So they all got into a car that just happened to be running Bob in the car or what she did. Oh, okay, well. So all those kids were unaware of the fact that the car they were in didn't belong to any of them?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, I don't know any.

[John Holmberg]

They just don't know his car. Well, tell your mom to press charges to the fullest. She said as she left my house, well if you come out to Columbus and I said bunny, we both know that's never going to happen. Now it might. I'll go out there and be the mouthpiece for her kindness. Cuz old people don't like pressing charges on young people. Cuz they think Jesus is like thinking that you should forgive them cuz they're close. No, if you stole Jesus whip, yes dude would be all over over your ass. You know why? Because he's judging.

[Brady Bogan]

Happy National Law Enforcement Day.

[John Holmberg]

Tip your cap to that boys and.

[Brady Bogan]

Girls in blue A couple of baseless fun facts. Once a giant clam settles into a place and begins to grow.

[John Holmberg]

Brady, we're not talking about your mom anymore. Stop. That conversation is over.

[Brady Bogan]

Tap it off. It settles into a place and it stays there for life. Which can be 100 years or more.

[John Holmberg]

Oh. Why? Okay. Hey, baby. How you doing? Rico Blaze up in the house on National Law Enforcement Day. And I'm going to enforce it right inside you whether you want it or not, baby. All right. How you celebrating today, Brady?

[Brady Bogan]

With you?

[John Holmberg]

Want a lick with you?

[Brady Bogan]

Wow, that's bold for you.

[John Holmberg]

It is bold for you, Brady, to assume that you would be in the same car as me on National Law Enforcement Day while I'm pulling up and arresting all that boon out there in the city today. All right? It's gonna be a nice day. Yes. I'm gonna say, oh, looks like you've been drinking blow. And miss, I know there ain't nothing in my hands, girl, but I can tell if you're drunk or not just by that activity. All right? It's also a day of national to law enforcement where Rico Blaze has made it. So if you under 170 pounds, you under arrest, baby. Cuz I don't want to see that. I want ladies over 170 walking my streets. If you under 170 get to eating, girl, it's time for a little corporal punishment, if you know what I'm talking about. Get a little RICO night. Stick up in this thing. I want to hear you say it. Get your hands behind my back. I like when a woman says, I can't breathe. That means I'm doing it right. National Law Enforcement Day is important. Old Rico Blair, you know how it is. I gotta arrest a couple perps, get my house and file some. Some reports while I'm buried in that big white ass I picked up on the way over. Goddamn. Check me out online. What was my name online again? I forgot. It was ridiculous. Forgot it all the way around. You asking your Miranda rights? Last time I checked with that, she was fine. Miranda's doing all right. You have the right to remain silent. But I prefer if you don't. You have the right to an attorney to film the entire activity. Oh, yeah. I got myself my little chest camera on. That's right. We're gonna film this entire endeavor, baby. I'm gonna show up, another cop's gonna come and another cop's gonna come. There'll be cops coming all day long if you call us today. By the way, I don't know how you forgot your online Persona. King Nut A Lot. That's right. King Nut A Lot. I forgot about that. Well, it's been minute. I. I was banned for a little while, but. That's right. King Nut A Lot. Uhoh. Looks like I'm getting a call on my radio. I'm on my way. God damn. Also, evidently I'm a Dolphins fan and we in the playoffs. I just saw a picture myself. I can't do this character while Toledo pulls up my actual sex videos. That's screwing things up right now. Now, cuz, looking at King Nut A Lot actually in action and doing the voice, I can do play by play of my own work if you'd like. Let me get my beanie on. I like to wear a beanie. I like to look like a big rubber, but I don't wear them. I'm going to give you the bumps, baby. Cuz nothing stops me. You got hemorrhoids. That's all right. That's just like going through a car wash every national law enforcement day. This is Brett's fault. You ain't posted in a few months. Yeah. Oh my God.

[Brady Bogan]

There's a brand called Sevy that has a new oven that is fast. That is as fast as a microwave. They claim it doesn't give chicken and other meat that rubbery texture like a microwave. And you can also bake it in under a minute. You can bake a cake in under four minutes.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, sounds like nuclear or something.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

What the. I don't know if I'm. I'm not interested in that until they. I want to see a year or two of that in action before I see all the tumors popping up on folks.

[Brady Bogan]

Two brothers from Switzerland came up with a new cat door called Flappy. And that prevents what?

[John Holmberg]

Why is Rico blaze talk earlier this morning? Are you kidding me? You talking about pussy Flappy? Is it door for your kitty? Is it in the front or back of the house? I only prefer one. You don't like both.

[Brady Bogan]

You can put it anywhere you want.

[John Holmberg]

Rika, I don't like those two words together. Sorry, baby. It's a little flappy for my taste. Put a little syrup on it though, you get flapjacks. Now we're talking.

[Brady Bogan]

So Flappy prevents cats from bringing dead mice inside.

[John Holmberg]

How?

[Brady Bogan]

It's outfitted with an AI that can detect a dead animal in your cat's mouth and it won't let him enter until they drop it.

[John Holmberg]

So it's just the cat turns into Wile E. Coyote and runs into a wall that looks like it's got a painted door on it. Yep.

[Brady Bogan]

Well. Or. Yeah. Or taps the paw to try to open the door. Yeah, but it'll.

[John Holmberg]

It'll ain't open.

[Brady Bogan]

It's not opening. Elk drops. That creature. I didn't know that was needed in this world.

[John Holmberg]

But apparently, yeah, the cat's out there catching mice in the backyard and bringing them to you. Doing his job. I know, but you got mice in the backyard. Make it an commentary. It's kind of commentary. Although now it's just Tom. It's called Got him.

[Brady Bogan]

If your girlfriend or wife started growing out her sideburns this week, you know why January started in 2019?

[John Holmberg]

What if your divorce sideburn.

[Brady Bogan]

Someone came up with it to encourage women to stop shaving, waxing, or plucking. No, for this month.

[John Holmberg]

Why? Why do you not talk about people? Groom yourself.

[Brady Bogan]

The official January Instagram account has over 40,000 followers.

[John Holmberg]

Not enough women with sideburns like General Burnside Sideburns. What are we looking at?

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, the Elvis.

[John Holmberg]

The ones that go all the way to the nose and then curl back? Yeah. Are we doing TCB sideburns? What kind of girl am I dating? I mean, Brett's Italian. You've never seen a woman with this much hair? Nope.

[Brady Bogan]

Your cheek looks like the hound dog.

[John Holmberg]

What is going on there with you and Wolf boy? It's January. My wife's not shaving. Why are you still the there? Why are you dating Teen Wolf Cordell And Cordell? Did she see a full moon? Get her out of the house. I'm not shaving for the month of January. Then you're living alone for the month of January.

[Brady Bogan]

That'll be a good first date. Someone meet. Yes, I'm participating in January.

[John Holmberg]

Goodbye. Intolerable.

[Brady Bogan]

I'll pay for your coffee. Dirty Hippie RIP two Fruit Stripe gum.

[John Holmberg]

I saw that.

[Brady Bogan]

I can't remember the last time I had any of that. It's a good run. 1969 to 2024.

[John Holmberg]

Seven seconds per. Per stick. You get seven or. I remember the flavor. No flavor. It's gone.

[Brady Bogan]

They said it runs around 55 seconds.

[John Holmberg]

If you're slow chewing it, you put seven good bites on that, you've got nothing left. But it was a good flavor. And the pack smell.

[Brady Bogan]

Out of the. Right, out of the punch.

[John Holmberg]

It was just. I could smell the gum more than chew it. Chewing it was pointless.

[Brady Bogan]

I didn't know. It came in five flavors.

[John Holmberg]

Yellow, green, pink, red, and wet.

[Brady Bogan]

And wild. Melon, cherry, lemon, orange, peach. There was also briefly, a chocolate flavor back in the 70s.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that sounds terrible. That's right. That skin colored one was peach. I avoided that. Yeah, when you peeled it out because of the fruit strike gum, every different stick was a different flavor. So you'd pull the peach ones I always threw away. I didn't know they were peach. They just were the color of my skin.

[Brady Bogan]

And of course the remaining stock is selling on ebay for crazy prices right now. I haven't checked it. The zebra mascot had a name. Never knew this either. Yipes. And the slogan was Yipes. Stripes.

[John Holmberg]

Ah, here's a rainbow.

[Brady Bogan]

It once was a clue on Jeopardy.

[John Holmberg]

A rainbow zebra. Like right. He had all the colors.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

100 bucks for a 12 pack of that gum right now on ebay. That's dumb.

[Brady Bogan]

Take advantage while you can.

[John Holmberg]

Why? You don't need it. Don't, don't. Don't spend a penny on.

[Brady Bogan]

No, no, no, no.

[John Holmberg]

The guy that's selling it. Oh yeah, I guess. Always. Yeah. I thought you meant buying. Buy it. That's a terrible advice. Stuff's going to be worth exactly 10 cents. I was just gonna say. Why are you go to Trajan? You can just go to Toledo for advice. Trajan just closed their doors because Toledo's sound advice of go grab yourself a bunch of fruit stripe. That's called easy street, my friend.

[Brady Bogan]

So far, 33% people in this survey said they've made a New year's resolution. About 16% say they plan. Plan to, but just haven't gotten around to it yet.

[John Holmberg]

How many have broken it already? Yeah, no kidding. Day three. I don't make resolutions. I make proclamations.

[Brady Bogan]

I think they say it's like 70%. 20, 20 days into it have already dropped. What's your proclamation?

[John Holmberg]

No more dealing with cheap people. That's made that before. No, that's this year's proclamation. If you prove yourself to be cheap, I'm calling you out on it. And that's enough already. Like the thing yesterday with that guy. And what would Brady do? Dude invite you to his son's game and then asks you to pay for the ticket afterwards?

[Brady Bogan]

No, I added another $5 for him for gas money.

[John Holmberg]

I'm not paying it. I'm just saying. No, no, that's not how the world works. Dude, I gave you a ticket. Exactly. You asked me to go. We were. We never once discussed this. This was an invitation. I think you said it yesterday. It's a bargain.

[Brady Bogan]

$245.

[John Holmberg]

Never hang out with that guy again and you got a free son's game. And I'm not paying you. Now, if we. Again, if we had an agreement early, hey, buy my ticket. I'll take it. Okay, that's great. But if you say, come with me to dinner and then ask me to pay for dinner, it's not happening. Inviters are the payers, unless previously discussed. That's how the world works. Yeah. That should be your first subject. As the invitee, you offer to pay. If they say, sure, yeah, then you've made the offer, you pay. But if they expect it, no. And you're buying drinks, too. And you buy drinks as the invitee, you pick up the food and drinks for the fact that you got a free ticket. It's a simple process. I'm done with cheap people.

[Brady Bogan]

The SS Pacific sank on the B.C. coast in 1875, and no one has laid claim to any of the 4,000 ounces of gold believed to be on board the ship that sunk.

[John Holmberg]

Is this the one that they're going after right now that there's a. Yeah, that big one. A group that's going.

[Brady Bogan]

No, there's one that's even bigger. This one is a. A different ship. Because right now the estimated worth of the gold is about 11 million. And no one's claimed it because if anyone that their relative was on it.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady Bogan]

They're entitled to some of the gold. No one's come forward on that. But the other side of it, if you had, you know, a relative that had not all of the ounces.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady Bogan]

A little bit, maybe worth $10,000. You have to pay the fee to go get it.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, and you have to pay for the upkeep. Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

You can't. You're not gonna be able to go down 1500ft.

[John Holmberg]

I don't think it's always like that treasure hunting thing seems like a good idea. But you watch those shows about the guys that if you don't find, like, 10 boats, you're not making anything. Because countries lay claim to stuff. Old relatives show up. It's. Yeah, it seems like a good idea to find a buried treasure, but if you find it on a beach that's already in a nation, it's not yours. You don't tell anybody. No. You gotta fight for it. Yeah, you just shut up, Jack. That if you find. That's Brett's greatest advice ever. If you find buried treasure, Shut your mouth. Yeah. Why are you calling the mouse? Like winning the lottery and nobody knows. Just grab a buddy, get some help. Yeah, dude, I found a buried treasure. You're gonna keep your mouth shut. Here, I'll split it with you.

[Brady Bogan]

Those guys, those salvage companies are very competitive and also oh yeah, they're armed and dangerous.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah they have to fight off. Once people know what you up to they start showing up like vultures. Everybody turns into Gollum with an Instagram. They're they're like greedy and then they want to brag about.

[Brady Bogan]

Was found by a US salvage company called Rockfish Inc. They've been searching for the wreck and its Golden Bounty since 2016. Using sonar towed a camera sled down about 500 meters and they found it. There were 200. It sank on November 4th, 1875 carrying at least 275 souls. Only two survived. They're still around but it had a. Had that 4,000 ounces in gold according to the ship's log and a bunch of other stuff.

[John Holmberg]

Nobody cares about the cattle. We're gonna unearth the cattle bones. Give me the gold. By the way Gollum's Instagram first new band name of 2024 kind of like that. Also came up with one right before the end when I saw a friend of mine sent me a picture of the he was leaving the Safeway and at the thing one of the tabloids headline said exhume Matthew Perry. I'm like that is a great band name right there. Should have been in the 90s. We already want to dig up Matthew Perry. The star does. Why not so sure.

[Brady Bogan]

The annual Consumer Electronics show starts tomorrow in Las Vegas.

[John Holmberg]

It seems like that just happened. I thought they stopped that. Why Saw a news story about the convention isn't it isn't as big as it used to be. Huge.

[Brady Bogan]

And the bathroom brand Kohler is pushing a new bidet that connects to Alexa or Google to offer voice activated butt washing. Alexa once she's done washing your butt. Yep. Then you can also turn on the drying feature to dry it off.

[John Holmberg]

Instead of having to use buttons we can now talk to the toilet.

[Brady Bogan]

Both features are offered on their Pure Wash E930 model which retails for the low price of $2,149.

[John Holmberg]

My prediction lid. Let me tell you this.

[Brady Bogan]

The lid. Yeah. If you want the whole. The whole it doesn't come.

[John Holmberg]

Oh that's one of those.

[Brady Bogan]

Okay. Yeah and but I what I've heard is it's on sale right now on the website. It has it for 1289 1000.

[John Holmberg]

That's it.

[Brady Bogan]

1200 bucks from this Checking out the website shopping. Look at you. The toilet option is 11 grand and worth it.

[John Holmberg]

We will be off paper in 10 years and it's going to Be a fight.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

But my way will win out. And all you naysayers with dirty scrubs butts will be beholden to me for fighting this good fight. For a long time, anybody argues with me that you're supposed to wash with soap and water after a poop. I know what your underwear looks like, period. Clean your ass with water. And those bidets are amazing. The good ones. Oh. And then they dry it. And then you can run a little water over paper over the edge, just like you do when you towel off after a shower. Shower. Toilet paper doesn't get one wipe. Doesn't get it done. So you're saying we'll become blotters. Right. You just kind of wipe well and then they dry it. But trust me. But we. I've been talking about this for how long? South park just did an episode on it last year about big toilet paper. Big paper. And how we're the only, like, major place. The west is the only place that still uses toilet paper to smoke mirror feces all over our bodies instead of wash. Another guy says, hey, San Simeon toilet paper gone. What are you thinking? Whatever, dude. Gone. You're wasting your time. Okay, turd butt. Keep smearing it all over you. Every time you argue with me, I know exactly what's going on.

[Brady Bogan]

Just watch that Sherman commercial where they're wiping the arm. The dry arms.

[John Holmberg]

Turd butts. Yeah. Like I've always said, if. If I got. If I threw feces at you, would you just go get dry paper and wipe it off and go. That's good. Bidets. Like, clean your ass and paper will be. We'll use a lot less of it if the big paper people, they're pushing the agenda.

[Brady Bogan]

Stephen Nerden, 38 years old. He was arrested for domestic violence or domestic battery. San Francisco Parentheses. Dating violence. He was with his date, and around 1:20am There's a confrontation after they had sex. And she said. She described him as limp dick.

[John Holmberg]

Oh. On the line.

[Brady Bogan]

And he attacked her with a dildo. I'll show you.

[John Holmberg]

Then she was right.

[Brady Bogan]

She was right.

[John Holmberg]

Couldn't use his own.

[Brady Bogan]

She said, you know, followed up, like, you should use a ed pill or.

[John Holmberg]

Next time during sex or after, afterwards. Wow. What a immediate review.

[Brady Bogan]

Made fun of his. Kind of. Yeah. Made fun of his performance, like, right after. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

You don't want.

[Brady Bogan]

And there's some drinking involved, so he has to wear a bracelet that monitors his alcohol.

[John Holmberg]

Sure. So he doesn't beat someone for three weeks.

[Brady Bogan]

Weeks, yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Evidently, that's not so bad. He doesn't Look a little.

[Brady Bogan]

He is coming off of. He's got to be very careful because he has a previous record. He just spent some time sitting a couple years.

[John Holmberg]

He's dildo abused before he did.

[Brady Bogan]

I think it was raw burglary.

[John Holmberg]

And he's a cop, wasn't he?

[Brady Bogan]

No, no, he wasn't a cop. Didn't that say ex cop, ex con?

[John Holmberg]

Oh, ex cop. Okay. I thought it was a headline when you put it down. So he's. Yeah, but you don't do that, especially if you like. Yeah, you just don't do that to a fella. If a woman would have every right to smack you around if you're like, all right, Arby's. What? That thing is disgusting. I rather have sex with a Big Montana than look at that again. Why did you. What are you doing? You should have every right to bonk in the head with her sex toys after that. Keep it moving, Arby. Keep it moving. Arby's. You have the meats. Now take them and get out of my house. I shot my horsey sauce. Now take it somewhere else. Why are you doing this? Because I'm reviewing our sex immediately afterwards and it wasn't good. And I blame you and that meat foundation thing you got there. Carl Buttig out the door. Arizona's most powerful Rocket league radio station. He said, fully erect, cease and assist at once. The rest of H's morning sickness. This is the Big Red radio. I got this email this morning. I loved it and it said, and this guy. The best part is the last question because it just shows what people think of us. We're friends. You guys don't think of us as any sort of importance at all. It's I love like. And you're not wrong. Hey, Holmberg. I was at a restaurant last night where a family had this screaming baby. The manager came over after a while and asked to do or asked the family to do something about it or leave. We were right at the table next to them and the mother lost her mom mind. How dare you. You were a child once. She started to call him names and S word. The dad grabbed the kid and left and screamed something about this being an abomination, which we laughed at because, no, it isn't. Then the mom started screaming at the manager who offered to just pay for their meals and boxed them up. He couldn't have been nicer. The mom then tried to flip the table over and hilariously and slowly she realized she could not flip it. So she just pushed everything off of it onto the ground. How do I call the news? You guys have to know somebody to report what a good job the manager did and what a crazy person this is. How do you go? You got us. What restaurant is this?

[Brady Bogan]

I'll go.

[John Holmberg]

That's what I want to support. That's the thing we really need to do is you tell us what restaurant it was, you tell us how things go, and we'll. We'll definitely give them some plugs. This is a place I want to be. Lunch today. Absolutely. But we need the guy to email back and say where this happened. But I love it that this is.

[Brady Bogan]

The last time we'll eat at White Castle, right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Because if it's that, it's like, all right, you should have expected the screaming babies. If there's a sign in the window that says, kids eat free. Yeah, you can't complain. That and the manager shouldn't have kicked them out there.

[Brady Bogan]

They had Chuck E. Cheese.

[John Holmberg]

Right? Exactly. Like, it depends if it's, you know, if it was postino and things like that and all those moms brought a screaming baby, they would. They would be. They would have been ridiculed out of it. So we got to find out where it is. Cuz again, kids eat free on the window. The manager can't kick the kid out.

[Brady Bogan]

It's like doubling down by mistake because they.

[John Holmberg]

You're.

[Brady Bogan]

You're called out a little bit. You got a screaming baby, so it's embarrassing for you. So your action is, get out. I'm gonna double down and make it even more embarrassing.

[John Holmberg]

Get out. That's it. You have one law on that. When. When I don't understand self. Someone that wants to stay in a place that just said get out. Like, if. Again, I'm a big believer, and this is a life philosophy for me, is you do not upset anyone who is in control of your food ever. You just don't rock that person's life. You don't mess with waiters. You don't mess with bus. Anyone who has access to a meal provided for you by them gets the best treatment possible. People who always say, I'm in the industry of working in restaurants and whatever else, that's a code to the waiter and waitress going, you get a little leeway with me because I've been there, but don't eff it up. But don't. Yeah, don't mess it up. Because we both know what you. What. What effing it up is. But I don't know who works here that's going to end up back in you Know that I'll piss off the wrong guy. It gets back to the cook, and the cook doesn't see me, but he's like, all right, I got this guy's back. And he says, the table 51's being a bunch of dicks. So I'm in. You just don't mess with people. So when a restaurant owner comes and says, hey, you have to go. I don't even think I might go. What did we do wrong? We just don't want you here. Okay, Out I go. I don't get people fighting to stay in a place that's asked them to leave. It doesn't register with me. No matter what, I'm not gonna stand there and go, you have no right to kick me out. Yes, I do. And why do you want to stay if I'm looking at you saying, I don't want you here? It's the gay cake. I want a gay cake. I'm like, we don't do gay cake. I want a gay cake. Anyway, I'm like. But then eventually, you're gonna be like, all right, I'll cook you a cake. And it's gonna just be filled with human bodily fluids and disgusting things. I showed them. You lo. You lose every time.

[Brady Bogan]

Time.

[John Holmberg]

When the person in charge of your food is mad at you, and then you talk him into making food for you. It doesn't make any sense. It doesn't make any sense. So you got a screaming baby. Even if the sign outside said kids eat free, the restaurant's wrong. But if they kick you out, go, Leave. Get out. Never go back. Doesn't add up to me. I don't understand was immediate.

[Brady Bogan]

I mean, I remember the first couple of years with Kirby, like walking into store, whether picking up up something at Target or whatever. The minute Vesuvius starts crying or something or throws it.

[John Holmberg]

Get out.

[Brady Bogan]

Even, you know, a couple times where you had the stuff, put it down and leave. Gotta go.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. The best thing you can do. And people would understand that too. You could have a cart full of things from 30 different aisles at the Costco. Your kid loses its mind. You leave. You leave the cart. Somebody in that place would appreciate it, say, I'll gladly put all this back to not listen to that horrible scream reaching rat that you can't control. That's. We understand. We've all.

[Brady Bogan]

And as a, you know, going through it, I understand there's a. There's a certain leeway because, oh, I was a parent there. All right, the kid's throwing a little right gasket. I'm gonna blow in a gasket. Let me try to fix this as a parent.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady Bogan]

And if it's not fixable one minute.

[John Holmberg]

Or something, you get one try. Yeah. And maybe a minute. People will tolerate it. Oh, that poor guy's got his kids lost.

[Brady Bogan]

Because it could be one. One little item they had on the shelf that they wanted.

[John Holmberg]

Wow. And Kirby never had those fits because Kirby got it. Kirby always got the item.

[Brady Bogan]

That's how you keep them from having fits.

[John Holmberg]

You give them everything they've ever asked for at any time. But he's right. He's never. I will say this. He's never once had Kirby throw a fit about anything ever in her life. Never had to. But if you're the right restaurant and people ask you to leave, just leave anywhere. Anywhere. You know who had it right was the African American population. They saw signs that said, no blacks or whites only. And they just said, that ain't right. And they never once tried to eat there. If they did, they knew. But you just know. I've had a. I. My theory for that. Ages, years. I think that that. That part of the civil rights movement was a mistake. Because if I'm a black guy or even as a white guy going in someplace, they might not like me. Bald guys, whatever. And the sign outside would have said, no black people allowed inside, but they're not allowed to put it up. I'd much prefer to know if the owner didn't want that in there. I would much prefer that.

[Brady Bogan]

I think about.

[John Holmberg]

They're announcing it wasn't all too long.

[Brady Bogan]

But people that, you know during that time that have a restaurant and were barely making it, maybe, yeah, lose it. Need more customers, but not. Not them. And you're still not gonna let them in.

[John Holmberg]

And you're in a black community and you're like, nah, I'll make ends meet some other way.

[Brady Bogan]

Just go. Go under.

[John Holmberg]

If I was Mexican or Jewish or black or whatever, I mean, I'm white. I've never had this problem. Nobody ever puts a no white sign up. And if they did, I'd be like, don't go in there as a white. I'm never gonna swing a door open. How dare you? Now where's my meal? Racist. It's like, no, no, you're not going into Roscoe's there in Anaheim if it says no white people allowed. Well, that's just abhorrent. I demand a meal from you. You know what you're getting, you idiot? Those stories of, like, you know, whites only places the black People were like, this is bad. This is not a good thing. But I'm not going in there and making a stink. They just, you know, they marched outside. They didn't go in and demand more food. White women flip tables over when they're told to leave because their kids are too loud. It's terrible. Yeah. If I was president, that's the first thing I'd do. I would. And it would make people a little uncomfortable, and the news would go. Go nuts. And CNN and MSNBC would have at me, but I'd be like, look, listen, take a second to absorb this. I want the owner of a restaurant to be able to tell me whose food he's going to spit in before I even go in. What he's going to do to stuff. If he's racist enough to put the sign up, you think it's going to. Well, I don't. I don't mess with the food he's going to do.

[Brady Bogan]

I'm sorry. You have to serve these people now.

[John Holmberg]

You must do it against everything you stand for. You go open the door. Doors. I'm surprised the next day they didn't have blacks only day, and they just had, you know, the pee and poop special. I've always wondered. Because the only thing that Civil Rights Movement act part did, that part was protect the races. Now they can't get in trouble for having a sign that says, I don't want these people in my restaurant. And then it turned into, we refused. We have the right to refuse anyone. It's like, all right, you. You do. And if a restaurant owner just came over and said, I don't like the look of you, and I'd like you to leave my restaurant, okay? You got no fight coming from me. None.

[Brady Bogan]

Well, now people are clearing tables off and broads. I'm asking you to leave that family.

[John Holmberg]

Notice what he said in that letter. The guy grabbed the kid and got out of there because he knows that the. The mom stayed behind to make the big, you know, scene. You just don't do it. Like I said, if you're with somebody that is making a scene before your food comes, I always make sure the server knows which one I order. Exactly. Yo, somebody starts mouthing, the burger is mine. Not the. Not the chicken fingers. This we brought. We're sorry. We want her to leave now. But, yeah, that's her food. Italians always got it right, too. You had a thing that said, no greasy Italians in the window. It's like, all right, don't go in there anymore, please, by all means. Now we'll open up our own place.

[Brady Bogan]

Oops.

[John Holmberg]

Oops. Looks like there was a gas leak. Some Larry lightning hit it. Yeah, Larry lightning smashed into it. Oh, what an unfortunate incident to the anti Italian establishment. People knew better. You put up a sign that says, no white people. White people go in there and start screaming about what they want. White women and gays. So white women. That gay cake thing was the one where I'm just like, why in the world do you want. Why do you want them to make you a cake they shouldn't be filled with. Oh, God. Well, that wouldn't. Maybe that's what's in a gay cake. You're right. I didn't even think of that. Maybe, maybe that's the whole. Maybe that's. This was their little twist on us. We go to a place that doesn't want to make us a gay cake and there'll be so much in it, it'll taste like home. It's exactly as we ordered. Oh, I'm so glad. They hate gays. They gave us exactly the ingredient we were missing.

[Brady Bogan]

Betty Cocker.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, exactly. Nobody doesn't like Sarah. That's true. It's a good point. It's an excellent point. But yeah, the gay cake thing was where I'm like, put up a sign that says, we don't serve gay weddings and gays stay away from it. That's wrong every. No, it is wrong. You're right. And it's. You're 100% right. It's the wrong way to be. And don't go in and make them make you make food. And if. And here's the other thing. If the market supports that you live in a neighborhood that kind of digs that whole situation, you might want to reconsider Queen Creek. Quit fighting to make everybody hide their racism. That's all it did was hide someone's racism. I'm not allowed to put a sign up anymore. Yeah, you can't say you hate blacks out loud anymore at your restaurant. I have to serve them. Yep. Okay. And it was. It didn't go well. I guarantee you that the African American population didn't flood the diners the day they made them take the signs out of the window. Guarantee you they stayed away from in those places. Still, I just hoped over time that would change.

[Brady Bogan]

Now it's just a handful of rebel flags in some yards.

[John Holmberg]

Right? You still get a few. That's. It doesn't have the words on it.

[Brady Bogan]

But, you know, I didn't realize on the front plate. I was watching smoking The Bandit on Sunday.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, yeah. Rebel flag on the. That's a.

[Brady Bogan]

How many times they showed.

[John Holmberg]

So here's the other thing. The first thing Burt Reynolds did when he got to Trans Am and smoking the band is put a Confederate flag in the front and ban one on the. The back. He got personalized plates before he even drove it. Before he even drove it. It was still in the truck. Before he put a mile on that car, it had to have a Confederate flag on the front of it. Had to.

[Brady Bogan]

And was it the. It's like a. Either. Is it Louisiana or.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's a state flag. Yeah, yeah, it's got the. It's. Yeah, it's. But it's. The Confed flag is on Bandit's car immediately. Immediately. He probably wouldn't make the deal with a dealership until they promised to give him that fake license plate for the front. Well, that probably came with the car, actually. And he had personalized plates on the ready. Yeah, he's the Bandit.

[Brady Bogan]

They had to have over a hundred plates for how many cars they went through.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, sure, sure. One thing they had to do was make sure that they had, you know, continuity with the racist Bandit car. Anyway, I don't get it. Restaurant owners, I'm on your side. You want to kick somebody out, that's fine. I don't get it. That's like in the movie Barber Shop when Cedric the Entertainer. There it is. Is that who it was in that? Cedric Entertainer was playing the Old Georgia bar? Let's admit three things. Rosa Parks would have got her ass up. Oh, yeah. OG did it. OJ did it. Rosa Parks. You got a lazy ass up. This caused trouble. Like, let's just make it easy. I want you sitting there. You don't make trouble for everybody. Everyone else. Yeah, it was a. I'll never understand that. That mentality escapes me. We don't take your kind in this bar, okay? That is as easy as it is to make me go away. And what's funny is that I went. I went to a bar once in Scottsdale, and I had a pair of tennis shoes on. You can't come in here with tennis shoes on. I'm like, I can't? No. Okay. And then the guy behind me is like, well, hold on. Walk. I'm like, just leave. Just leave. Why do you want to be part of it? Why do you want in there? Now there's like, they're just basically saying you're scum. And I don't want to be in a place that thinks I'm Scum. I just. I'll leave you made you. May you have a rule. Fine.

[Brady Bogan]

No hats.

[John Holmberg]

No hats is another one. You can't have hats on. And then of course, some dude came in dressed like, you know, I don't know what the hell he was dressed as at a vest. It was summertime. It looked like he was in a life preserver. And it looked like Bono had a garage sale or something. And this dude just raided it. He had the big yellow glasses, he had a hat on backwards. I'm like, that's odd. That's very early 90s Bono. And then he was in there with his hat on backwards. But he was like important or something. I don't know. I just had a pair of tennis shoes. I'm like, you can't go in. I don't want him. That's as easy as it gets. You don't. You're not allowed here. Okay. Why? Because you're white. That's a big one. Okay, bye. And white people, we have. This is a built in thing and it's through our ancestry, the guilt of all the terrible things we've done to people over the years as a race. That's why when we look in a restaurant, we look around and, you know, it's like there are no other ones of us. We pretty much leave. Like if we walk in, all the heads turn and it's just all black faces or all Mexican faces or all probably. I don't go to the Italian American Club because I might get found out. And they've got a trap sign outside that says everyone welcome. Because they know deep down, as long as you're one of us, right? By calling it the Italian American thing, you're not inviting everybody. But at the bottom, they had to write the thing. Everybody, everyone's welcome. To a degree. Most of people do a degree. Do you think that there is one African American family driving up 12th street going, I could go for some Italian. You know what might be good? The Italian American center where everyone is welcome. Those Italians are well known for being, you know, arms wide open type folk. They're not going in there. They'd rather go to races, graze Italian food than they would the Italian American Center. I don't go in the Italian American Center. He looks a little Jewy to me. Like there's a guarantee. They look at me and go, what are you? You're not Italian. What's your last name? Holmberg. Ah, Myron. Hey, we gotta do something. What are you doing? What are you, an accountant? What are you Doing? You coming in to look at the books? I'm actually Swedish. Oh. We don't even know what to do with this. We ever fought Sweden, probably, but yeah. I'm not going in there. They got everyone's welcome. They've painted the entire parking lot. Lot. I don't know if you've been by there recently.

[Brady Bogan]

I. I went there.

[John Holmberg]

All flag, Italian flag, all of it. Now, the whole thing couldn't scream anybody but Italians. That everyone's a welcome sign and Columbus is in front of it. I'm like, come on, you guys. Just say it. You love it. But I drive by there and think, can't go in there.

[Brady Bogan]

I went in one time, and that was for a wedding. It's a person that was a member there. Had it.

[John Holmberg]

They're all right with that. Yeah, you're a gang guest. Well, you're bringing an envelope. You're a guest, and you're leaving. A few years ago, Megan's dad had a friend who used to. He performed in a band, and they played the Italian American center. And he's calling, going, you guys want to go over there and watch? I'm like, absolutely not. I'll call Brett and see. This is before you were on the show. Brett wants to go. Maybe we. I'm not doing it otherwise. Like, why not? I'm like, have you. They painted the entire. You're. You're. It's like living inside the Italian flag for a minute. Beautiful thing. And I'm sure it's fine in there. I just, you know, things go south. There's my feeling right there. If things go south inside there, I'm last on the list of people to help. It's Italians first. And there's going to be like a hundred of them in there. Me, the black guy, and the Jew are going to be pushed in a corner. Sounds like a being of a joke. Me, the homburg. A black guy and a Jew wandered into the Italian America, said there was a kitchen fire. You don't think they're gonna put it out with us? Just mash up against the fire, put it out with the Swede and the Jew. Like, what are you doing? Shut up. You're a fire extinguisher now. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said, fully erect, grab some protection. Here comes the best of homburg's. More morning sickness. I'm 98k upd. Well, we have a late entry, everybody. A late entry. Shame this guy has decided to give Nathan Sutherland a run for his money. Shame we have the Nathan Sutherland Heel of the Year award. Phoenix edition. They live amongst us. I say they live right next to all of us here in the beautiful city. You've been to Circle K's, they've been there. One of you out there listening has probably bumped into this guy, driven past him on the freeway, maybe shopped with him at Safeway and didn't even know it. But here he is. And his name as an entry for this year's Nathan Sutherland Heel of the Year award is of course I can't even find it. Where is his name? Oh, Russell Bird or Randall Bird? I'm sorry? Randall Bird. Randall Bird. Shame. The hopefully last entry in the Nathan Sutherland Angela award. Shame. Here's what he did. This is fun stuff. He's now a former Banner Health security guard and he's accused of having sex with a woman's corpse last month at a Phoenix Hospital. 79 year old dead woman. How was he caught? He was acting a little nervous around the other employees with his zipper down after he was moving a bag of body and when they went in and saw the bag of body like hey, this is unzipped. You're not supposed to unzip the body bags. What's going on the news so delicately places this part on there. His DNA was found on the court. Ah, God, he closed on top. Oh God.

[Brady Bogan]

At least there's no pregnancy, you know.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's shame. She was 79. He said the decency to wait for.

[Brady Bogan]

Menopause and you unsure how it works.

[John Holmberg]

She can't get pregnant, right? She's old. No, she's dead. You at. Stop it. Video surveillance show the 79 year old woman's body arriving at the morgue on October 27th the second when the Mr. Bird was in charge of transporting her to the morgue, police said. Court documents say two witnesses arrived at the morgue and found the doors locked from the inside. The Matt Lauer move. That's unusual. A light could be seen inside the freezer and then the freezer door was cracked open. Two witnesses reportedly saw Bird inside the freezer where he was sweating profusely in the freezer. Oh, he'd gone to town acting very nervous. Court paperwork says that Bird had his removed his duty belt and his zipper was open. His uniform looked messy. Investigators say the victim's body bag was unzipped and she was faced facing down. Got her in the prone position. Brady, one of my faves. He didn't want to look at her face while he was going to town. Oh, Bird's belt was on Top of the gurney where the victim's body was. Authorities say as the witness walked into the morgue, Byrd immediately covered the victim's body, then claimed he was going through a medical episode and had fainted and grabbed the victim's body as he fell. Court. Yeah, that's. That's what happened. That's exactly down there. Shame. Oh. Court paperwork states that Bird. Shame told the witnesses the body bag then tore open as his. He had his rogue stay his fugue state. Breaking bad fans. Then the zipper broke and ripped open. However, the witnesses disputed the claim, saying the zipper isn't broken. Broken. The two then reported Bird to their supervisor, assuming something terrible had happened. He claimed he had his medical episode. Can't remember any of it. That was when they first started asking what. What was going on in there? You know what? I had a medical episode, and I don't remember any of this. There's a good chance that during this fugue state, I raped an old lady's dead body. You know, I guess it happens. You know what? I've heard a lot about medical episodes. We've all known of family members. Well, you know, a medical episode. Oh, my God. Did he. Did he rape any corpses? No, because that's. That's a symptom of that.

[Brady Bogan]

His seizure opened the, you know, hard on.

[John Holmberg]

It happens a lot. He was taken into custody Tuesday and booked on crimes against a dead person, Class four felony. Is that a high class? Was class four high? That's a high class or is? What are you looking at me for? How would I know? I'm just asking. You might know a law or two. Is it a low? Is class one stronger? In Arizona, those convicted of class four felonies face between one to four years in prison. So it's a lower felony. That should be higher. You know, how many classes are there? A few. Four is the one that I would prefer being one in this case. Rape A dead body at a hospital says to me, should be looking at longer than a year to four. Four years anyway. Banner hell said, well, we're saddened and appalled by the alleged actions of one of our employees here. So we're gonna get rid of him. And then they said, thanks the police, for acting so quickly.

[Brady Bogan]

It's an above average class felony.

[John Holmberg]

Is it?

[Brady Bogan]

There's six classes.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, so six. What is six? Just like batting the body around a little bit. So, yeah, that's his excuse. I had a medical episode. Not real sure what happened happened in there. Class 6 is like theft and stuff like that. Okay, so there he Is Randall Byrd making a last month entry into the Nathan Sutherland Heel of the Year awards?

[Brady Bogan]

You're right. It's the other way around.

[John Holmberg]

One is the worst.

[Brady Bogan]

One is the worst.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, that's what I thought. It's like homicide. Shame. Anyway. Well, congratulations, Randall. You made the news. And now your name is out there. So if you know Randall Burton or his family at all today, it's time to express great shame in their direction and let them tell you, oh, we hate him too. And then they can do it. And then we'll share it. Randall Byrd is today's shame. Go get him.

[Brady Bogan]

Now, to equate the class four. Yeah, it's in line with like a dui.

[John Holmberg]

No kidding.

[Brady Bogan]

One year prison sentence.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, because they said that the body being face down, they had some evidence. Evidence?

[Brady Bogan]

Bribery.

[John Holmberg]

That proved he was damaging it. You know what I mean? 79 year old woman too. Somebody's grandma out there. Somebody out there lost their 79 year old grandma. They were over at Banner Health and they just got their fingers crossed that this isn't the same body. Can you imagine that news coming back? Your 79 year old mother, grandmother. She's gone. We've lost her. Oh, oh, it's tragic. We got to plan a funeral and stuff. She's in the good hands of a medical community. The next thing you know. Hey, we got another call coming in. Remember your grandma? Yeah. Evidently she got one more in her and we arrested the guy. Don't worry. You'd want to kill everybody. We'd want to kill everyone. Especially if he did that to Babu Randall. Now how does he get out of jail and have a normal if he did that to Babu Brady? That's right. Shame. You get the call that said, oh yeah, your grandma's gone. Shame. And one of our employees flipped her over and gave her shame. Think of beautiful little Babu. Now. My grandma Isabel was a tough old broad. Shame. Even dead, that would have been a hard bang. Shame. She died when she was in her mid-80s, but I don't think anybody wanted to have sex with her when she was 79 and alive. My other grandma was in her 80s and 84 or so when she passed away. Same thing. How in the world is this person walking amongst us with a potential maximum four year sentence?

[Brady Bogan]

Babu lived the 85 in the last, you know, four or five years she was in that active senior community.

[John Holmberg]

Active, all right.

[Brady Bogan]

A lot of chardonnay being drunk.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, yeah, she was. She was putting it back and probably. Sure, I'll try that one more time. Hold my Teeth. And my grandson. Brady. Stop talking about your grandkids. It's hard enough to keep this thing. Hard. What are those? Goldfish sacks? What it does in my breast. Still good at it. It's like eating angel ham pasta. Anyway, Randall Bird, 46 years old. Check our system and see if he's one of our former winners or something. Because we can do that. We can see if he's in our database. Randall's probably.

[Brady Bogan]

But again, no relation to Sew Bird.

[John Holmberg]

You know what? Yes, absolutely. Yeah. WNBA strikes again. Yep. Wnba, great relative, super. It's possible that he's one of our listeners now. Bi or by bi. B I R D. Randall like Larry Bird. Only not like Larry Bird, because Larry, as far as I know, has never raped a corpse. Unless you count what he did to Kareem in the later years of his career. Because Kareem couldn't defend him and he was a good 4 inches taller. Nope, he's not one of us. Not one of ours. All right, well, there you go, Kez listener. Randall Burges, great shame. And to you at Banner Health, great shame. And we need to fight harder on when you rape grandmas who have passed away being more than a Class 4 felony because he might be the one winner of the Nathan Sutherland Heel of the Year. They walk amongst this award for 2023. Now, I thought it was gonna be a tough fight to beat. What's her name? McLaughlin over there. April McLaughlin. Yeah. All those dogs and then she tried to get them back and she was just abusing animals like crazy. This one might top it. I don't know where we're gonna go in the voting, but there's some serious shame there. And he's. Here's the thing I always think about with this.

[Brady Bogan]

I felt.

[John Holmberg]

I felt I had a medical condition. Here's the thing about that. If he sticks to that story, four years, five years from now, he's out of jail. Let's say he gets the maximum sentence right now.

[Brady Bogan]

What's less than that?

[John Holmberg]

Four or five years? Let's say he serves it right. Let's say he goes the full shebang. And you're right, probably not. Five years. He's out looking for a gig. Where'd you go there from 2024 to 2030. I was sent away. Have you ever been a felon? Uh huh. Yeah. What happened? We'll see. I had this fugue state and turns out I raped an old lady's dead body. And you want to be my textile salesman? Yeah, I'd like that. I'd like that job very much.

[Brady Bogan]

And you'd like to be security here at Pebble Creek, right?

[John Holmberg]

I would like to ride. I'm very good with a. A golf cart. I feel like I could keep an eye on things and. Look, I'm not interested in any of the residents. Well, not now at least. Someday I will be when they, you know, can't move around as good. Randall Byrd. This man allegedly got an erection in a room with a 79 year old woman. Oh, yeah, she was also dead. That's more impossible. Possible. Not only did he get an erection, he made it happen. He unzipped the bag. I wouldn't do that if I worked in the morgue. Anyway. No, you're not supposed to. That's a. That's one of the rules evidently, that the guy's moving the bodies from here to there. That's why they caught him. Like, why is the bag unzip. One of the rules is you can't unzip it. That's only for like the. The Next step guy. I don't know if he's a doctor or mortician or whatever, but. You're not allowed to unzip the bags. They go in the freezer as is.

[Brady Bogan]

Start putting those safety locks on them. Like in luggage.

[John Holmberg]

Right. And air tags. Know where they are at all times. Randall, you were in there with her. Where'd she go anyway? Randall Bird. Good dude. Caught someone on that one. I'll tell you right now. Brady Shane. Someone out there in this city. Shame. Friends with Randall Candleberg. Finding this out. Someone is friends with him. That's why it's. It's more important to me to do these stories locally. Sure. If I said it was in Port St. Lucie, Florida, you'd be like, ah, Florida. We'd think nothing of it. They walk amongst us. They're out there. There's one right now sitting by you has done something like that. Think of how many times he may have done this before, right?

[Brady Bogan]

How long he's been at Banner.

[John Holmberg]

If there are any broads that slept with him. With live ones. I mean, it is.

[Brady Bogan]

He always wants to be outside when it's cold.

[John Holmberg]

It's. He's probably laying in the snow. I love the cold. It just. I love. It gets me. Try and get it on in the beer cooler at Circle K. Yeah, this one. This guy, one of our listeners, is just an awful human being. Says, what's the big deal? She's dead already. One man's trash and another man's treasure. Now stop that, Nathan. I understand Dark humor, but that's not it. Even Nathan Sutherland's like, man, come on. Mine was still breathing. It's pretty bad. And his mug shot is not a pleasant moment for him as well. So if in the future looks like the guy from Pawn Stars. Oh, my gosh, it looks like Rick from pot. You're right. If in the future, keep him in mind. And that's why I'm gonna say his name a lot. Randall Byrd. If he is, in fact convicted of these crimes he's alleged to have committed, remember the name Randall Byrd forever and ever. Because someday he's gonna need a job, and he's probably gonna march around this city that we love so much shame. And don't be one of those weird Christians that tries to give people like that a second chance. I don't care how much you apologize, find Jesus, do whatever you do. A, you make heaven worse. B, you're here now. You're out. You're out of society. Who made the rule that that's a Class 4 felony? That should be top of the list. Bad. Like OJ's crimes were at least understandable.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, I'd be bumping that up to a one or two.

[John Holmberg]

It's a one. Man, that. I mean, somebody needs to look at that. I guess it's class four, because they probably wrote it down. Go. Going, this is probably never gonna happen. And if it does, there's reasonable explanation behind it. And then they find out, oh, no, it's. It's a thing. It needs to be a class one. Who's the victim? The family of the old lady. And do you tell them? You probably have to. Right. The identity of the victim will never be disclosed. But do you tell the family? I think that's best. Unknown if my grandma.

[Brady Bogan]

I think you have to.

[John Holmberg]

I know. I think you have to, but I don't. I wouldn't want to know. You've recently lost a loved one. And even if your grandma was primed but, like, horrible, like one of those horrible old ladies, you still don't want her to get, you know, roughed up after she dies. It's the old Sam Kinison thing. Remember when he was laying down on the stage doing that thing, going, talking about sometimes even people will hump a dead body? Body. You're laying there and your soul's looking down your body. Yeah. You know, I had a pretty good life. Not so bad. And what. What's this I'm getting when I'm dead? It's pretty great to watch Sam Kinison do it because it's comedy. This is. This is reality. Randall Bird. Shame. And we'll go through. Hopefully no more Shame show up before the end of the year. It's the holiday season. Shame. Whoop dee doo.

[Brady Bogan]

My vote's in.

[John Holmberg]

You like this one? Yeah. Yeah. I think April McLaughlin's a strong run if you look at what happened with those dogs she was hanging on to. But again, the dead body thinks another level of bad. Here we go. Does he keep his fleshlight in the freezer by any chance? He's got his sex toys are all. You go to his house, he's got like, what are you collecting some venison in this garage freezer? No, I can't keep some stuff in there. Wow. It looks like a bunch of dick sleeves and fleshlights. What's going on in here? I like them cold. The freezer, he was sweating profusely in the. Now, let's just say for, you know, sake of argument, he had a medical episode. He's sweating real hard in the freezer, starting to fall down, zipper opens up. Somehow or another, his DNA shoots out of him, lands on the old lady. Yeah, his zipper opened up. What kind. Yeah, and his pants fell off. His belt was on the pest control.

[Brady Bogan]

Guy that the zipper was broken.

[John Holmberg]

Right.

[Brady Bogan]

And his junk's hanging out.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, sometimes that happens. Yeah, that happened to that guy multiple times. Yeah. You know, you have that medical episode. This belt's certainly tight. I'll just put this here on the table next to the dead body. Oh, I think I might orgasm here in a second. Ah, Fired. Went off in the air. My pants are down. These damn medical episodes.

[Brady Bogan]

This is why you don't. Don't do no nut November.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, exactly right, Brady. Here we are at the end of it. Now, if you're a lawyer and you get this case, come on, do the right thing. Fumble the ball. Fumble it in a huge way. Make a mess of this guy's life.

[Brady Bogan]

No case needed.

[John Holmberg]

I would be the worst defense lawyer ever. When I'm like, what's your. What am I going in there with? Well, see, I didn't feel good, so I felt down, grabbed the thing. How's your DNA on her? That I don't know. All right, I'm gonna fumble this ball. You're going to jail. You're going to passed out, go to jail for a long time. You got the. You got a lawyer who can really. This is bad, Randall. Shame. Why don't we just go in there and say you did it?

[Brady Bogan]

So much blood ran down there.

[John Holmberg]

Let's.

[Brady Bogan]

I passed Out.

[John Holmberg]

I didn't know they still bled, so it made me kind of. I don't like sight of blood. I don't mind a dead body. They arouse me. But I didn't know they had blood in them still. I thought when you froze them, that stopped. And I didn't think old lady still bled from there. Okay, okay, Randall, I'm not gonna defend you anymore. How do you find that poor lawyer? And it's kind of honorable, but it's more honorable lawyer if you just fumble it and get him like extra time and then just go back to. After everything you say at the. At the court hearing, just go back and sit next to Randall.

[Brady Bogan]

Go.

[John Holmberg]

Whoopsie. Kind of made a mess of that, didn't I? I want another lawyer. This isn't just. I'm doing the best I can with your story. Fumble it. Let's get him the max, which is four years. Hopefully I can add a bunch of other stuff on there. There's our guy. What a way to start. He does look like the dude from Pawn Stars. I'm telling you, people are sending me pictures. He's going to catch it. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect, chew and poop.

[Brady Bogan]

That's all they do.

[John Holmberg]

That's all they're good for. Chewing and pooping. The best of H's. Morning sickness. This is the Big Red Radio. This segment brought to You Guys by Mo Money Pond, 12th street and Indian School.

[Brady Bogan]

Now, whatever you're looking for, it doesn't.

[John Holmberg]

Matter if it's electronics, jewelry, tools, pretty much. You name it, they got it there. All right? Check them out [e-mail] or like I.

[Brady Bogan]

Said, just go to the store and check them out.

[John Holmberg]

12Th street in Indian School, it's Mo Money Pond. Brachiocephalic, as they say. It's a little bit of a nasal, anyway, all right? And all you people are horrible human beings. Hey, let's make a movie called Weekend at Bernice. Thank you for being a friend with benefits. No. And then this email from Scott Haynes says, just isn't every day you get to have sex with the first lady. You got to give this guy a break. It wasn't Rosalynn Carter. Knock it off. Off. And it. It begs the question, if, in fact the lady who Randall Byrd allegedly did this with was a celebrity or a political figure, would the punishment be more than a Class 4 felony.

[Brady Bogan]

Circle case slogan there?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, the Randall Bird can't have your circle case Logan cup because it gets him hard. It says, stays cold Longer on Brady's glass.

[Brady Bogan]

The old polar pop.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe his wife gave him a bingo hall pass. Okay, that's enough, everybody. Scott Nichols says at least he's not a pedophile. All right, this is. Everything is wrong with you guys. We're. No wonder the society stinks so bad. Come on. You're being funny, and I don't want to laugh at this. I do kind of want to laugh. Somebody wanted to hear Jet Cold Hard Bitch for the. For the Wake up song. That's somebody's grandma. Somebody is looking at a bowl of butterscotch candies and crying their eyes out. Yeah, she's giving it. And that's. She's got a. She's a victim.

[Brady Bogan]

Foreigner. Cold as ice. I'm sure that.

[John Holmberg]

All right, all right.

[Brady Bogan]

Enough.

[John Holmberg]

Ice Cold ice. We're not doing it. Babies. Off the list. Although hilarious. I hate that you're making me fun. I'm here for the jokes, but sometimes it's hard. Just like Randall Burton. All right, that's enough. We. We fight the creepiness with the humor. At least some of us can still fight back. Ridiculous. Has to end my ego trolling Miss Daisy. All right. No. Wouldn't it be great if he was also a Christian rapper and we found out that that was the link to, you know, that kind of stuff. Randall Bird likes his women like he likes his coffee, cold brew. All right, it's not even. That doesn't even make sense. But most people are saying the same things about this creep that lives amongst us. And I have yet to hear from his neighbor or friend or somebody who knows him. And they're out there. That's why we do the local angle. That's what radio is. It's locality. You can't get that on ChatGPT, talking to Nashville, or all these other places that have these shows that are elsewhere that pipe in here. They're not talking about Randall Byrd to their Utah audience, but we are, because we're trying to weed out a couple of his buddies. Call us, email me. I'll keep you anonymous. I actually had a lawyer. He's a friend of mine, so I won't say his name. He text me and he said, john, I can tell you this. Don't use my name. I said, all right, Mike, I won't. As a lawyer who used to be. He used to be a defender. He goes, we give him the best possible defense, but in certain cases, it's only what we like, the bare minimum. So I text back him, like, so you fumble a couple. And he goes, we don't fumble them. We do the bare minimum. We just know this guy is getting defense based on. Here's the line I need. This is what I need to do. It's the 15 pieces of flair. I'm not going above and beyond to try to get this guy's sentence lessened because it's only an ego move. So that's good news to me. That, that sounds great. Now I know everybody deserves a lawyer that gives you the best possible defense, but in this particular case, none of us really want a lawyer to help this guy. Enough though, with the joke. Is cuddling out of the question afterwards? You have to put her in spoon position. Stop it. Is there a MeToo movement for her type of people? Is it that. No, there's not. It said. You just raised an interesting question without realizing it. When you say at least he's not a pedophile. Is it worse?

[Brady Bogan]

There's the term for the older world one. It's.

[John Holmberg]

Well, there's the necro is the dead people.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, that's dead. But a person that has the Ophelia.

[John Holmberg]

That likes old people.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, they have the category for people.

[John Holmberg]

Who dig old people because there's different.

[Brady Bogan]

Stages of the pedophile too, because there's a younger like the age classification in the court.

[John Holmberg]

But you're saying like people who are into old people, there's no crime against them unless you're raping them. That's called rape. Yeah, Elder abuse is the, like, you can't do that to elderly people. Can't hurt elderly people who are weak. But I don't think if you, if you wanted to date like an 80 year old right now you're allowed.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah, that's legally allowed. But I guess I think I was thinking the condition a person that a younger person that likes older.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, that's called creepy. That's called gross. Yeah, that's what that is. That's called daddy issues for girls. And gross. If you're a guy, no dude wants to date an old woman. Oh. It's also called closeted homosexuality if you're a man. Because what was that show on the.

[Brady Bogan]

BBC where that young kid kept dating those old.

[John Holmberg]

They liked old ladies. Yeah, because he was. He's gay and he just. He doesn't want to be around. It's his way out. See, I like ladies. I just have a penchant for these old ones that don't like sex. The ones that are done with it. It's gross anyway. Yeah, it does. I wonder if it was a child if the sentence Is worse. It should be the same. A dead body is a dead body. It's gross. Oh, you mean a child's dead body. Yeah. Or. Okay, I thought you meant just a. A regular pedo or banging a dead body. No, I know. Well, both are to me. You're not allowed back in society after that. Oh, I agree. And. And I'm. I'm not a popular politician, so I can say this. I'm all for culling the herd when it comes to these guys. The faster we get rid of them from our world, the better off our world.

[Brady Bogan]

Is it behavior correctable?

[John Holmberg]

I'm not into correctable behavior. You know the rules. You know the rules if you're gonna break them. Seriously.

[Brady Bogan]

That was just one time.

[John Holmberg]

I'm all for like, the whole thing. Take a piece of cake out of the fridge, ask for forgiveness later. That's where forgiveness goes to me. This whole, you know. Well, everybody's redeemable, not their not. You knew the rules about dead bodies going in. You knew the deal. No forgiveness. Don't go asking for that after the fact. I'm human. I make mistakes. I don't want to hear from you. Let Jesus forgive you. To quote Corey Taylor, I'm not Jesus. I will not forgive this one. There's forgivable acts, and then there's the ones where you're like, you need to disappear. And that's what society.

[Brady Bogan]

I think he's corrected. Let's take him down to the morgue and test him out.

[John Holmberg]

Let's have him stand around some cool. Hold real still around him and see what he does. We don't take him right to the morgue. That's, you know, dog training 101. Let's just get him around a. Lay on your stomach and hold still and see what he does. And he'll start going, oh, I'm having one of those episodes. Yeah, I don't think that's something that I'm willing to be like. Well, everyone deserves a second chance. No, they don't. Not everyone. Not everyone. Drug addicts, alcoholics, guys who hump dead old ladies. You've lost your chance at a second chance. Yeah, I don't find it beautiful to go, well, it's for I forgive him. It's in God's hands. No, it's not. The old lady was. And he swiped him out of God's hands and had sex with her body. He's out pedophiles and necrophiliacs and there's a few out there. It's just. You're not coming back for me. You're just not coming around and convincing me later that, no, I'm better now. You knew the rules going in. Don't ask me for forgiveness after that. He needs to go. The planet needs a nice, big, fat culling. That's why I thought Covid was gonna do it. But we stopped it in its traps. It wasn't strong on.

[Brady Bogan]

You're right. It ends up costing us more money.

[John Holmberg]

Heck, yeah. Just start icing him. He deserves a second. I. I don't. I. I don't want to be friends with anybody. Start icing him. Yeah, I'm sorry. That's lit. He'd like that. Yeah. I said to be honest, though, John. I've been married for a long time. And after kids being married for a long, long time. Time having sex with a dead woman, you can't really tell the difference. So maybe he just didn't know. That's an assault on women who have been married for a while. It's like having sex with a corpse after a while because ladies start hating it. You know, there's a book called having sex, even if you don't want it. And it's for women. It's something like that. The title's like, sex. Sex when you don't want. Yeah. Sex when you don't like sex. Even if you don't want it. It's called. And it's because, like, women hate sex so much, or at least lead us to believe that they write books for each other, going, here's how you make it seem like it's okay, which is why the gay thing is exploding. This is why people are turning to gay. You're noticing a lot more gay ladies because you just complained about sex for so long there. It's called sex when you don't feel like it. The truth about mismatched libido and rediscovering design. Hardcover. That's when you don't feel like it.

[Brady Bogan]

I've gotten around that. I just put Louis Vuitton on my forehead right in the frame of mind.

[John Holmberg]

Make her feel like it. Yeah. If a purse had a dick on it, we would be pointless, except for we got to fill the purse. Yeah. Books like that, and it leads to this kind of stuff. You know what never happens is a lady in the morgue rubbing up against the dead guy. It doesn't occur. They do have better control. There was a story years ago about some. Some lady that got impregnated by a dead body. Yeah, I've heard about that. That was on A medical journal. Yeah. Jennifer Burrows. I guess he had a. He had one good load left. She was.

[Brady Bogan]

That had to been pretty fresh.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, she was getting them pretty quick. But, ah, that semen stuff that lasts a while, so it still had to be fairly fresh. Well, I tell the story if it's.

[Brady Bogan]

Stored in the barrel.

[John Holmberg]

When my aunt, for some reason, when my uncle. We got to sit in the bot in the room with the body for a while and she reached over and started giving him a tug, she was like, this is the last time I'll ever feel this thing. And for some reason, either Uncle Bob was packing or he was kind of aroused as a dead guy. Because when she was stroking over those sheets, I was like, all right, nice work, Uncle Bob. Too bad that thing's going in the ground. Can we save that? Because I had to part him out for called dibs on that gigantic. What is that thing? She gave it a reach and a. And I'll never feel this. I'll never feel this again. You would have started tugging at my dad's like, all right, all right, let's get out of here. We're all standing in the room. Well, she was a distraught widow. She didn't expect him to die that day. He just croaked. Got a aneurysm, Pop. He didn't know. She didn't know. Looked at her. His last words were, I don't feel. And then blood poured out of his mouth. Then she reached over. I don't even think she knows she did it. She was sucking on his finger trying to get the ring off. I mean, that's a dead body. It creeped us all out, but he's already starting to turn a different color. Oh, it was weird. And then she started to give him a. An old Fashioned right in front of me and my dad. All right, all right. That was my dad's exact reaction. All right, all right, all right. Well, I'll never feel it again. Dan. Plenty of those out there. Let's get out of here.

[Brady Bogan]

Hey, what kind of spread you got? Hours later.

[John Holmberg]

And. Yeah, that was Brady at the funeral. What are you doing here? You never knew Uncle Bob. Sure I did. Kind of spread. We got pinwheels. What do we like? What are you looking at? You're here for the food, you son of a bitch. How quick do we get through this thing? This guy on display ain't going anywhere. We could do this after we eat.

[Brady Bogan]

I got a guy that can part him.

[John Holmberg]

We're good here, Andrew. Bart has the quote of the morning. What a Classy individual. Andrew, is that Lady Sniz? Probably. Similar texture and temp as a Choco Taco. Sniz. Dicks don't say sniz about somebody's past, Grandma.

[Brady Bogan]

Sorry.

[John Holmberg]

Maybe rigor mortis makes it tighter than we could ever imagine. All right, Donovan, stop fantasizing.

[Brady Bogan]

Save his email.

[John Holmberg]

Donovan Horn, you're next on the list of Shane guys. What was that? You can't start thinking about how it. That's not such a bad idea, Donovan. Shame. You're gonna come in second, buddy. Shame. This guy says, I like old ladies. Jordan says, they're fantastic. As long as you find the right one. I'm 34. My old lady's 45, and we bang like rabbits. She looks great, too. Jordan Knox. That's not old. We're talking about know 70. Those dudes who are, like, in their 30s and dig chicks in there? Retiree. They're just after your paycheck. Like Randy Travis and Hugh. Hugh Jackman. He had that. And that's immediately what everybody said. That's Hugh Jackman's wife. Oh, he's gay.

[Brady Bogan]

Not anymore.

[John Holmberg]

No, they got divorced. Doesn't Keanu have an old lady? Keanu likes that old lady. Yeah. Yep. Anyway. Well, there you go for that requested.

[Brady Bogan]

Arctic Monkeys for the morning wake up.

[John Holmberg]

All right, that's enough. Ice Cold. And we're not playing Ice Cube either. I don't want any of that. Knock it off. No. No Boo to you. And now you, Brady. And you, Brett. Third and fourth place. Shame. It's terrible. So where's the old lady's body? She still got any butterscotch candies in her pockets? What do we got going on?

[Brady Bogan]

Better head over there.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, these look like vanilla ones. Oh, God, they're coated. Stop it, you guys. We're not playing Touch of Gray from the Grateful Dead either, all right? Come on. Way beyond a touch. Maybe she had a tattoo that said Boner Garage. No, she didn't. That's someone's Grandma. Joel Luna. YouTube. Joel. Shame. Fifth place. Yeah, I think this guy's our. He's running away with it right now. As far as the most Memorable in Phoenix award this year. My God.

[Brady Bogan]

So Randall's favorite stat is Cold and Grams.

[John Holmberg]

That's enough, Shame. Now you're just pushing it. Although that got me. Damn it, Shane. Stop finding humor in it. Shame. Shame. Oh, God. My buddy's cousin is hosing an old lady in our apartment complex, and we give him crap because she's so old and she's also broke. And he says, hey, Man. When I get drunk enough, her wrinkles go away. Way Johnny likes his women. Like his coffee ground up in a freezer. All right. That's it. We're done. You people are horrible. But I do agree that this wasn't his first rodeo. This does not. This does not strike me as. I'm going to give this a try.

[Brady Bogan]

Like how long has he been working.

[John Holmberg]

Working at Banner especially because she was flipped over so he had a favorite way. And again a criminal profiler would say that's remorse. He doesn't want to even look a dead. Like you don't want to look him in the face. Like you do it. Like it becomes an object. Like there's. There's definitely a psychiatric thing to turning her over. There's a. There's a realization of how wrong this actually is. Is by dehumanizing her. By making her have no face. Creepy guy says if Brady loses Rock wars, can we change one rule? No. It's still a sex dog. Are you supposed to have public sex with a doll? But that is no. Anyway. That's weird. And the other thing that's going on in the world that I would. All right. Andrew Krieger says. But seriously, on a serious note. She never said no. All right, Stop it. Damn it. I feel bad for even bringing this up. Now I'm the bad guy. And I had nothing to do with Randall Bird. That's the name on everybody. Just find out if you Shame over there at Banner Medicine. I want to know about the guys who used to have lunch with him and stuff. Shame. Was he a weirdo? Let's get to know him. Those are. My buddy who had a stroke was down at that Banner medical. Sound sleeper. Never know Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect. It's John Holmberg here. And thank you for listening to the Best of holmberg's morning sickness. 2024 in the books doesn't mean you can stop taking care of yourself. You have to forge forward into the new year. And don't do it with resolutions or silliness. For crying out loud. Call my [e-mail] you got a couple more days to take advantage of their amazing deal. Hombergen train get you two months of training for 199 bucks. Turn you into a sheep dog. Keep you from being a sheep. Reactdefense.com it's the home of Tactical Black rerun Brady. Entertain me.

[Brady Bogan]

Elon Musk got roasted yesterday for his animated panther video he posted to Hype X. Yeah.

[John Holmberg]

Hilarious.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. Some comments were. Elon has the same taste as a teenage call of duty youtuber, circa of 2015. Remember, he's on the spot spectrum.

[John Holmberg]

He's going to be. And he's also got a brain you can't imagine. So of course he's going to come across sometimes as a douche or as a little bit different. And that's what I like. That's what extraordinary people do. Yes.

[Brady Bogan]

It's like the bowling alley TVs when you get a strike. It is.

[John Holmberg]

Oh, you got it in front.

[Brady Bogan]

I don't know if it's got any audio.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, it's a. It's a weird, like, cyber panther. It just scratches the screen and does an X. It does look like a kicking ass bowling strike on the screen. I thought it was.

[Brady Bogan]

Last one. He paid $44 billion for this, right?

[John Holmberg]

Not for that. I know, but when I had that lunch with that astrophysicist, I realized he can't talk to people. And it's not continually frustrating for him to talk to me. He's sitting there looking at me going, I gotta be. I gotta dumb down everything just to get my point across to him. So if you were to talk to Elon Musk, they would have conversations and I. I'd be like, dorks. Because it would be words that are crazy. This guy tried to explain things to me and his eyes would roll and he goes, how do I say? It was like a different language. And I realized, oh, you're extraordinary and I'm not. So this is hard for you to try to talk to me and be normal. And then when I talked to him about basic everyday stuff, he was clueless. He wasn't interested in that. So the interaction was odd.

[Brady Bogan]

Elon Musk, supermodel.

[John Holmberg]

Well, no.

[Brady Bogan]

You can talk all day long, by the way.

[John Holmberg]

If you have a billion dollars, it doesn't matter if you're smart, doesn't matter at all. The supermodels show up, you're an astrophysicist. It's the IT guys, and everybody's up. They don't know how to talk to you as a normal human being.

[Brady Bogan]

And the supermodels ain't showing up.

[John Holmberg]

He's not that she's a dog, but Briggs isn't anything to. She's all right. Yeah. He could have done better with this one. Yeah, he's not interested. Our guys, David, the engineer here, who's just solely and totally interested in making electronic things work, he has no interest in your family life or things you talk about day to day.

[Brady Bogan]

Coffee and electronics.

[John Holmberg]

That's it. The man likes coffee. And then he just stares at lights and beeps and buzzes. He can't interact normally. He's not normal. Smarter than you. Brett's the only one in the room that can talk to him. Can you? Yeah, he does, kinda. Yeah. But when he gets going, it's like, oh, yeah. Then I just. Then my eyes glaze over. Yeah. Brady just pretends to sleep when he's around. Oh, there's that guy. He'll buy it. He'll buy it. Brady, that big exclamation point on your computer screen? That's not good. Didn't notice it.

[Brady Bogan]

Hulk Hogan and a friend helped rescue a 17 year old woman from a overturned car on the highway in Tampa.

[John Holmberg]

Nice. That's who you want pulling over next to you if your car's on the top. Yeah.

[Brady Bogan]

The airbag deployed. I got her seatbelt undone and. Sounds like she's gonna be okay.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. If you wanted like Mr. Olympia on a bus and they're going from event to event and your car turns over, well, that would be an awesome.

[Brady Bogan]

Don't worry, little sister. We'll get you out.

[John Holmberg]

Nice stroke of luck. And we're gonna flip the car onto its wheels. All of his friends are out there.

[Brady Bogan]

It has to be. Has to be. All of them.

[John Holmberg]

Can you lift what the rock is lifting? Let's do this, brother. Bunch of professional wrestlers. Flip my car on. I think it's hard to believe that frogman stole that girl. You're not gonna believe what happened to me, honey. Hulk Hogan flipped my car over. Are you banging Hulk Hogan?

[Brady Bogan]

TLC is rolling out a new reality show called MILF Manor where eight older women.

[John Holmberg]

Brace yourself.

[Brady Bogan]

Look for the love of younger guys. Here's the twist. The eight MILFs have their eight sons on the island. Each have a shot of each other.

[John Holmberg]

So there's. There's seven mils.

[Brady Bogan]

Eight mils.

[John Holmberg]

Well, I know. I'm saying seven of them will not be related to.

[Brady Bogan]

Correct.

[John Holmberg]

Like. Like they. You have seven choices. Basically. Correct. Each one. Correct. Each one has seven choices. Was this filmed in Apache Junction or something? I mean. Oh, and what if you discovered that the best one's yours.

[Brady Bogan]

You're winning money.

[John Holmberg]

No, no, no, no. I'm saying, like, your son is the one you're like, I think I like him the most.

[Brady Bogan]

Or you get. Or one of them gets jealous, Right?

[John Holmberg]

Yeah. Oh, gosh.

[Brady Bogan]

Milf Manor hits TLC on January 15th.

[John Holmberg]

And these women, their faces are they. Sid and Marty Croft had better, more realistic puppets than These ladies and.

[Brady Bogan]

The mental illness that's going on.

[John Holmberg]

There's a ton of that. You can. And the funny thing is in the previous you can see, oh, she needs a lot of help. She's. She's not comfortable with herself at all. It's weird, not every one of them.

[Brady Bogan]

But most of them were talking about how they're libido. The one mentioned that. But they're like, oh, I have sex drive.

[John Holmberg]

You can't imagine. I have a libido. Yeah. Is that why you're divorced 48 and alone? And ask your ex husband. Let's ask your ex husband about your. Your. Your insatiable desire for sex. Because I'm guessing you're trying to talk yourself into that more than you are actually that, oh, my Libido's on stuff 14, 15 times a day. Huh, Huh. I have to wonder if that's true or not because there's an ex husband out there. Probably got a different story. Not a lot of guys I meet in their 50s turn and go, I just. I divorced her because the sex was just. It was non stop. It was getting in the way of eating.

[Brady Bogan]

Paparazzi caught up with Gary Busey the other day. He was in Malibu, picked a bush over there on the side of the road and whipped it out and started.

[John Holmberg]

While they were filming him.

[Brady Bogan]

Yeah. Then he turns around and just gives.

[John Holmberg]

Me a little smile. When you gotta go, you gotta go.

[Brady Bogan]

It gets even better, Brady.

[John Holmberg]

My back teeth were floating. I'm dressed for it. I'm dressed like a guy who pisses outside.

[Brady Bogan]

Ate so many corn nuts you had to get.

[John Holmberg]

I still love that. Paparazzi says, there's Gary Busey. Busey. Like they would go, oh, let's go the other way. Hey guys, look at me. Oh, Gary Busey wants us to take his picture.

[Brady Bogan]

Like, don't care.

[John Holmberg]

Hey, look it. What do I have to do to get on tmz? Where's a guy got to take a huge public, Have Harvey Levin talk about him.

[Brady Bogan]

DC was more popular than Marvel in 2022. On Pornhub, Harley Quinn was number one.

[John Holmberg]

They've got the best. I kind of noticed that actually. Did you see that on there? I did some Harley Quinn's. Oh my God. There's a couple Harley Quinn's in porn that aren't bad.

[Brady Bogan]

Star wars number two.

[John Holmberg]

I saw one stuck under a couch. That's pretty great. She was dressed as Harley Quinn and she was doing this thing with furniture and she moved the couch. Well, she'd kind of jammed between that and a Wall. And some guy came to help her and took her pants off. It's like the weirdest porn ever. But I'm so into it. Like, girls so stupid, they get stuck doing houses, work, and they like, they'll do. I pick up a penny on the ground and then they can't figure out how to get out from under the counter. And then some guy comes up and go, oh, help. He just bangs her.

[Brady Bogan]

Black Widow was in the top five. Wonder Woman, Sonic porn, the Hedgehog, Google without Ron Jeremy. All right, yeah, it's Hedgehog.

[John Holmberg]

Well, that's Ron Jeremy. Though maybe it does have something to do with him. Maybe they just sped up Ron Jeremy's tapes.

[Brady Bogan]

Catwoman, number seven, Avengers.

[John Holmberg]

I don't either. I don't know. It just looks like cartoon stuff. Like. Yeah, people are into that. It's not like the cosplay thing. I mean, it's.

[Brady Bogan]

Or the anime.

[John Holmberg]

Remember Larry, when Larry for a little while was starting to show me those cartoons of those giant canned ladies with penises? And we were both kind of like, this is sort of hot. We couldn't figure out what was going on. But Sonic the Hedgehog sex is weird and very popular. Evidently you do. Larry's in. Yeah, give me. Hang on. Show me how Donkey Kong Jr was made. She's not swinging on vines. Those are not bananas. It's Rico Blaze. There is Donkey Kong porn. How about that? Where he actually bangs the princess. Whoa. Princess Peach indeed. Would Mario. Wow, look at that. That's just a hole in her pants. Would Mario want her after the Kong has been inside of that? Not a hole.

[Brady Bogan]

John, her shorts are down.

[John Holmberg]

No, I guess. So what's with the color problem? Sure. Orange. And that's like Curious George porn there. I think that's Donkey Kong Jr. Yeah. Donkey Kong country, that is. Well, how do they spell that? I guarantee you, if you're. There's a circle. Okay. Gigantic donkey dongs. Woo. Into. Wow. Yeah, I guarantee you. Damn human. Look at. Brady is not even looking at the TVs.

[Brady Bogan]

No, I was just looking on the list of the other video and we.

[John Holmberg]

Found the one you want to look at. Brady, don't worry about the rest of.

[Brady Bogan]

Them avatars up there.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, don't care about that. Although. Any other ones? What is going on in that one, man? Look at that big veiny thing. That's like Donkey Kong simian pedophilia. That was every one of them.

[Brady Bogan]

The incredible game number 15.

[John Holmberg]

Okay, go to the Incredibles. I gotta see this plastic thing. Oh, no. The mom had quite a Body in the Incredibles. Oh, this is bad. Geez, they're not messing around. It's immediate. There's no like. Google doesn't say. We think you meant. Look at that. What's it called? Incest is not. I'm not watching Incestables. Brother Sister Porn. Come on. Mom is so hot. Oh, my God, that's sexy. Turn it off. I like it. Oh, no. There she is. Getting finger prismed. Oh, she's on the spit. Look, Larry, they got the Incredible mom on a spit. Rotisserie. Is that syndrome? Does she? No.

[Brady Bogan]

Jackson. What's his name? Freeze.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, or something like that. Well, I'm glad our former artist friend John Hoffman went the right way. Well, he did. These guys that get fired from Pixar.

[Brady Bogan]

Is this what they do?

[John Holmberg]

There's the daughter tied up.

[Brady Bogan]

Wow, man. Any other?

[John Holmberg]

These people. We share the answer. These. We share the earth with these people. There's Frozone. You asked about him. Is there. Is there Call of Duty porn? Oh, like what would that be? That's got to be right, huh? I think so too. There it is. There's none of it. There's a ton of it. This one. Oh my God, she's got a gun to her head. Nico. Oh, wrong, wrong. Oh, there's. God guarantee you. There's the awesome GTA porn. Oh my God, Brady, look what you've started.

[Brady Bogan]

Just giving you the list.

[John Holmberg]

Yeah, we're taking it. And running, man. Well done. Oh, yeah. Ew. Wow, there's actual. Holy cow. That's pretty good too. All right, I got my day planned. There he is. That Trevor. That is. Oh, that is. That's Nico. No, that's Nico. Yeah. Oh my goodness. All right, I'm in. Thanks, Brady, for that. Brady gave you guys all that.

[Brady Bogan]

Happy holidays, Kirby.

[John Holmberg]

Your daddy told me about it.

[Brady Bogan]

Oh, God, I did.

[John Holmberg]

I did not. I was just reading a list.

[Brady Bogan]

Final one is the Sopranos celebrating its 25th anniversary with a special collection available for streaming on Mac Max. In addition to all six seasons, there are also 15 deleted scenes, including three that have never been released, and over five hours of behind the scenes footage.

[John Holmberg]

I'll see you guys later. I gotta go too. Is this out now? Sign off?

[Brady Bogan]

Sounds like it.

[John Holmberg]

How did Toledo miss this?

[Brady Bogan]

On Thursday, there will be a family reunion fan screening only in Los Angeles.

[John Holmberg]

Angeles?

[Brady Bogan]

In New York, man, they'll have Sopranos themed snacks and trivia. The other thing that LA and New York are getting, a Sopranos inspired Italian sandwich available through Postmates.

[John Holmberg]

I'll be watching that with you. Brett. Oh, yeah. That's going to be awesome. All right, we're all done. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said fully erect.