BEST OF HMS PODCASTS - FRIDAY - May 23, 2025 - Guad Squares - Biden - Morgan Freeman - The Late Bill Walton - Trump/Lake - Shrinking Brady - Pope And Thom Brennaman - Clint Eastwood - May 2024

Summary

Podcast Summary: Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona

Episode: BEST OF HMS PODCASTS - FRIDAY, May 23, 2025
Host/Author: 98KUPD | Hubbard Radio
Release Date: May 23, 2025
Description: A compilation of the most memorable and entertaining moments from "Holmberg's Morning Sickness," Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show. Hosts John Holmberg, Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo engage listeners with humor, satire, and lively discussions on current events and pop culture.

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1. Guadalupe Squares: Political and Celebrity Satire

The episode kicks off with the popular segment "Guadalupe Squares," where the hosts engage in humorous and often irreverent discussions about prominent figures and current events.

• President Biden:

  • Dick Toledo humorously questions Biden’s authenticity:
    "Biden, is that a fake laugh from the teleprompter?" [02:00]
  • The banter continues with mockery of Biden’s behavior:
    "Can't stop laughing. Don't stop laughing." [02:08]

• Donald Trump and Kari Lake:

  • Mo and Dick Toledo debate Trump's legal troubles, predicting his incarceration:
    "Trump's going to jail. That clown's going to the can." [02:12]
  • Kari Lake joins in with aggressive commentary:
    "How dare you put him in jail." [07:23]

• Morgan Freeman's 87th Birthday:

  • The hosts celebrate Morgan Freeman with playful remarks about his age and appearance:
    "Every year I earn a new freckle." [03:37]
    "Still looking good." [03:33]

• The Late Bill Walton:

  • Mo humorously speculates about Bill Walton's afterlife basketball adventures:
    "I'm still working on my own eulogy. I plan to speak more than anyone at my own funeral." [05:43]

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2. Shrinking Brady: A Comedic Take on Physical Changes

In this segment, Brady Bogen becomes the centerpiece of a humorous discussion about shrinking, reminiscent of the superhero Ant-Man.

• Brady's Shrinking Predicament:

  • Brady laments his decreasing height with exaggerated panic:
    "I'm shrinking now. I don't." [09:33]
    "Pretty soon I'll be your height." [09:30]

• Host Reactions:

  • Mo and fellow hosts respond with playful concern and jokes about their own heights:
    "We got this. You know where I still got good size, though, right?" [10:08]

---

3. Pope and Pride Month Parade: Irreverent Humor

The hosts delve into discussions about the upcoming Pride Month Parade, bringing in the Pope and Thom Brennaman for added comedic effect.

• Planning the Parade Coverage:

  • Mo and the hosts mockingly describe their role in the parade:
    "We're gonna have ourselves a little play by play. The Pope and me." [11:00]
    "They're coming, coming from all angles of Arizona." [11:35]

• Carrie Lake's Aggressive Commentary:

  • Carrie Lake delivers heightened, satirical threats related to the parade:
    "I'm gonna bust down the door, bitch. I'm gonna hit him so hard." [26:41]

---

4. Celebrating Clint Eastwood's 94th Birthday

A lighthearted tribute to Clint Eastwood, blending admiration with humorous observations about his lifestyle.

• Clint Eastwood's Quips:

  • Clint jokes about losing his driver's license:
    "I just took my license away. I can't drive my Gran Torino around anymore." [13:10]

• Hosts' Banter:

  • The hosts engage in playful teasing about Eastwood’s driving habits and appearance:
    "How about that, huh? Beautiful stand." [13:33]

---

5. Listener Interactions: Andrea and Zach’s Call-In

Interactive segments with listeners Andrea and Zach add a personal touch to the episode, featuring them in the "Guadalupe Squares" game.

• Andrea and Zach Participate:

  • Andrea selects the "Shrinking" square, leading to more comedic exchanges:
    "I have no idea what's going on." [17:13]
    "Pretty soon I'll be shorter than you." [17:49]

• Engaging Dialogue:

  • The hosts and listeners share laughs over height jokes and playful insults:
    "You look like one of your people." [17:58]

---

6. Historical Trivia: Toothbrush Bristles and More

A brief educational segment infused with humor, challenging listeners with historical trivia questions.

• Toothbrush Trivia:

  • The hosts present a true or false question about the origin of toothbrush bristles:
    "In the year in the 1400s, toothbrushes were made with dog hair bristles." [20:42]
  • Mo humorously debates the answer before revealing the truth:
    "It's actually hog and horse hair." [21:04]

• Vaginal Speculum History:

  • A discussion on the origins of medical instruments with exaggerated historical anecdotes:
    "They split them open with those salad tongs and let it air out." [22:14]

---

7. Comedy Promotions and Community Highlights

The hosts promote local comedy events and community activities, maintaining an engaging connection with their audience.

• Local Comedy Shows:
  • Promotions for comedians like Leo Gonzalez and venues such as the Improv and Stand Up Live:
    "See comedy sets from Leo Gonzalez and Tempe at the Improv." [14:07]

---

8. Finale: Political Jabs and Final Banter

The episode wraps up with sharp political satire and the hosts' signature humorous insults directed at political figures.

• Free Trump Movement:

  • Mo and Carrie Lake fervently support Trump with exaggerated slogans:
    "Free Trump. A good guy." [25:54]
    "I'm gonna be rotten all summer long." [26:57]

• Final Exchanges:

  • The hosts and guests exchange rapid-fire insults and satirical remarks:
    "I've got to die." [25:54]
    "I'm DTF all day long if it means getting deep inside that old Q tip called Biden." [26:41]

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Notable Quotes:

• "Trump's going to jail. That clown's going to the can." – Mo [02:12]
• "Every year I earn a new freckle." – Morgan Freeman [03:37]
• "I'm shrinking now. I don't." – Brady Bogen [09:33]
• "I'm gonna knock all the prunes out of your body with one move." – Carrie Lake [26:30]
• "Free Trump. A good guy." – Mo [25:54]

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Conclusion

This "Best Of" episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness encapsulates the show's blend of humor, satire, and lively banter. From political jabs and celebrity tributes to interactive listener segments and historical trivia, the hosts deliver an engaging and entertaining experience for their audience. Notable for their irreverent style and quick-witted exchanges, John Holmberg and his team ensure that listeners are both entertained and provoked to think critically about the topics discussed.

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Note: This summary excludes advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections to focus solely on the engaging discussions and humorous segments that define the show's appeal.

Transcript

[Brett Vesel]

You're listening to the HMS podcast brought to you by MMP Guns.com, your most trusted online marketplace for firearms, ammunition and accessories.

[Dick Toledo]

It's Dick Toledo from Holberg's Morning Sickness for Game Day Men's Health I did my free consultation with Game Day back in November because I was experiencing a lack of energy and focus. Now, nearly six months later, I'm feeling like my old old self again. Go to gameday phoenix.com today and book a free consultation in a matter of minutes at Game Day's In House lab. A licensed Game Day clinician will draw your blood, run some tests and formulate a plan to incorporate any number of these therap to help you get back in the game. You can battle the clock of aging and it starts today at one of the 11 game day men's Health locations in the valley@gameday phoenix.com Come on down.

[Mo]

To the Ranch House Grill.

[Unknown]

Comfort food is your next meal. Pork Chili verde, Chicken fried steak. Ranch House knows you'll think it's great. Are you ready for the best breakfast in Phoenix? Ranch House Grill has been voted best breakfast four years in a row. We're famous for our chicken fried steak, pork chili verde and large portions. Located in the heart of Arcadia. Join us for breakfast or lunch seven days a week, 6am to 2pm We're a family restaurant with a small town atmosphere serving Southwestern comfort food for 18 years. Come on down to the Ranch House Grill for the best breakfast in Phoenix at 56th street and Thomas Road.

[Larry McFeely]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from AMCO. And Wayne, if my car has an extended warranty, do I have to take it back to the dealer for service?

[Wayne]

No, Larry, if you have an extended service contract, you can use it at any amco.

[Larry McFeely]

It's nice to have other options.

[Wayne]

I'll say Amco has dealership quality rental cars, no hassles and faster service.

[Larry McFeely]

Amco does more than just transmissions, right?

[Wayne]

Right. If you need car repairs or hear, feel, see, smell, or even think you have a car issue, call Amco first.

[Larry McFeely]

Just Google Amco for your nearest loc. That's Amco Double A MCO transmissions and.

[Mo]

A whole lot more. Do not listen to this while driving or when full alertness is needed.

[Unknown]

The best of Homburg's morning sickness. This is the Big Red Radio.

[Mo]

Let's get right to it now that we're late. This is your fault, Mo.

[Unknown]

Oh God.

[Mo]

It's time for your Guadalupe squares. Here's your hostess, Ms. Moberg Ramo thank.

[Unknown]

You, Chancellor, in the top left square, our president is here. Biden, Is that a fake laugh from the teleprompter?

Can't stop laughing. Don't stop laughing.

[Mo]

Let me laugh.

[Unknown]

Okay.

Why you laugh?

[Mo]

Trump's going to jail. That clown's going to the can.

[Unknown]

Do you really think he's going?

Yeah, of course I do.

Yeah, I put him there. Do you think him and Hunter are gonna, like, you know, cellmates or something?

[Mo]

Hunter's been.

[Unknown]

Pardon.

[Mo]

You know what you talk about?

[Unknown]

You know what you talk about over there?

[Mo]

Trump's going to jail. Me and Vice President Kevin Hart are laughing all the way.

[Unknown]

That's not your vice president.

Get enough of it.

She's much taller than Kevin Hart.

[Mo]

Now, we're going to have a conviction party tonight at the.

[Unknown]

Everybody's invited.

[Mo]

Come on down.

[Unknown]

Sounds like a cult.

It'll be a great time.

[Mo]

No, Kevin Hart's gonna have all his friends over. Earthquake.

[Unknown]

Kamala.

[Mo]

What's that lady's name from the.

[Unknown]

Monique gonna be there.

[Mo]

Kevin Hart hangs out with all this.

[Unknown]

Hutter's gonna bring all the powder.

[Mo]

Oh, Tupac Harris down there, she's gonna be running the show. Her name, Suge. Kamala.

[Unknown]

She's gonna dangle you out from a balcony if you keep talking.

[Mo]

She likes the bass, I like the treble.

[Unknown]

Okay, the top left square or, I'm sorry, top middle square. Here. For his 87th birthday, it's Mr. Morgan Freeman.

Oh, hello, sir.

Much quicker with the music than Toledo.

[Mo]

I have to, officially.

[Unknown]

Normally, there's a swell there, but this time it's not. How old AM I?

You're 87.

87 years old.

Still looking good.

Am I?

Yeah, I think so. Got all your freckles. Do you get a new freckle every year?

Every year I earn a new freckle.

Where did this one show up today?

You want to see it? You have to crawl through 400 yards of the foulest filth Morgan Freeman can produce. Never mind come out the other side smelling like a rose. Would you like to see my freckles play? Connect the dots and I can draw you.

It depends on where it's at.

It's everywhere and nowhere at once. It's an everywhere freckle. I'm actually white.

Aren't you just a big freckle. That's incredible. Wow.

Sometimes I like to explain things to people who aren't very bright and watch their eyes light up, and I just got that from you.

Thank you.

I look at you and I have one question. Have you ever been to sejo.

What?

That's where my friend Andy lives.

[Mo]

Oh.

[Unknown]

And I have to wonder if you and your cleaning supply truck have ever been there. You seem like a. A resident of say Wa. And I miss my friend.

I may have visited a few times.

Have you been?

I just.

Oh, well, you should invite me down there one time.

Ah, no, I don't think so.

Well, I would.

Unless you're gonna help me help you clean.

Why would I do that?

[Mo]

That's why I hired you.

[Unknown]

Maybe you can narrate it, though. It'll sound so much better.

I'd narrate your cleaning. And then Moe, put on the yellow gloves and reach deep into the toilet to pull out that last land shark eye dropped.

All right, moving on to the top right square rip. It's Bill Walton.

[Mo]

Perhaps for the last time, throw it down to the big man. If we never realized we him so much. Brady, it's great to see you, and it's also wonderful to see you. Mo. As we traverse the planet for just one more spin I float above you like Neo from the Matrix wondering how it's going to be with heavenly Weed. I can't wait to smoke the fields of heaven and ready myself for basketball with the past expired grates like Bill Russell and Wilt Chamberlain and O.J. simpson.

[Unknown]

No, he's. That's.

[Mo]

No, that's exactly where we're going with this. And we're gonna fly on the great dragon across the terrain of San Diego as I finally get to meet up with my old friend Jerry Garcia. It's going to be amazing. Throwing it down to the heavenly dead man. I'm still working on my own eulogy. I plan to speak more than anyone at my own funeral. It's going to be absolutely amaz. Amazing.

[Unknown]

All right, we got to the middle.

[Mo]

You have no idea who I am.

[Unknown]

Moving on to the middle Life square. Here to talk about all 34 counts. It's Trump.

[Mo]

I'd love to talk about them, but I've got a gag order. Remember when you were straight and you knew what a gag order felt like? Now I've got one, and it's not good. I've got. I got a lot of people on my side, though. My popularity just went through the moon. I'm basically Bonnie and Clyde without Bonnie.

[Unknown]

Well, then it sounds like you have a great gag reflex.

[Mo]

I've got a nice gag reflex. I'll tell you about all 34 counts. Count one bull. Count two bullsh t. Count three bull. I think you see the trend, and that's where it's going. And don't think I don't have people on my side helping, because I do. I've got a lot of good people. I got a lot of folks.

[Unknown]

I don't think they helped you enough.

[Mo]

By the way, here's $30. Shut up. It's what I do to a lady. I give. There'll be. Trust me. That's plenty for you, my friend. Plenty for you. I've got one person on my side, and I'm about to unleash her.

[Unknown]

I'm looking for some stormy money unchained.

[Mo]

Here she is, ladies and gentlemen, my pit bull. Ready to go. The macho man Kari Lake is here. Come on in.

[Unknown]

Oh, yeah.

[Carrie Lake]

You done messed with the bull and now you're gonna get the warden, Sister. How dare you put him in jail. If you do, I'll bend every bar and he'll squeez Brett right out of it. And you're gonna feel the wrath of the macho man, Carrie Lake. Can I help out my friend who's about to be imprisoned unlawfully? By the way, taking pictures of this is against the rules, Brett. I'm turning as red as homebird shorts over this terrible travesty of justice.

[Mo]

I told you I'd let her loose on you and it would be a great thing. And here you go. You asked for it, America. Carrie Lake off the chain. You know what I'm saying? Exactly. Black people get it. That's why I speak to them. Off the chain. Off. I speak urban. That's what I do.

[Carrie Lake]

Nobody done more for the blacks than this guy right here and take his cotton candy orange hair and shove it right up Biden's ass come November.

[Mo]

That's exactly our plan. In fact, that's our campaign slogan. I'm shoving my cotton candy hair right up Biden's ass. Vote Trump 24.

[Unknown]

That's how it works.

I think your new slogan should be Orange is the new black.

[Mo]

Check out my new drip. Carrie got it for me. It's a leotard. I look pretty good. I think I look great, actually. It's a really nice outfit, I think. Nobody wears it like Trump. That's for sure. Was it? Well, how can it be prostitution if you showed up?

[Carrie Lake]

That's exactly what I was saying. Stormy Daniels. Hormy Daniels. She goes into the room and expects a D and that's what she got. How dare she put this great man behind bars.

[Unknown]

All right, Carrie, take a breath.

[Mo]

All I'm saying. This is your fault. She's loose.

[Unknown]

I think you let her Loose.

[Mo]

Loose like Stormy Daniels, I'll tell you that. She might have thought I had a small one, but it's hard to park a Tic Tac in a garage.

[Unknown]

Oh, God. All right, moving on to the middle square. It's shrinking. Shrinking, Brady.

I am shrinking.

Like Ant man shrinking.

Yes, I am Ant Man.

How tall were you yesterday versus today?

5 8. What was the last time I checked? I think I'm hovering around 54 right now. And it's not good.

I'm pretty sure you've been 54 this whole time.

I feel it happening right now.

Oh, no.

I'm shrinking now. I don't.

[Mo]

I'm shrinking.

[Unknown]

You sound like Megan now.

Okay, I'm down to five, three and a half. This is a bit. Keeblers just called me and offered me a space in their tree. I don't know what to do. I don't think they want me in that cookie tree.

I don't think so either.

That would be wrecked pretty quick. That would be tornado going through the Keebler house. That's how that works. But yeah. I don't want to shrink anymore. Soon I'll be your height.

We're the same height.

[Mo]

What?

[Unknown]

Yeah, I'm 531-8. We got this.

You know where I still got good size, though, right?

I don't know. Where were you gonna tell me? Maybe I shouldn't ask Mwang.

No, it's a fairly obvious answer. I thought, you know, that. Hey, look up in the sky. The plane. The plane.

[Mo]

Oh, my God.

[Unknown]

It's happening. Oh, no. What is happening, boss?

[Mo]

I'm shrinking.

[Unknown]

You auditioning for the new Wicked movie coming out?

What's that? Something gay?

Yeah. Sounds you should be ready.

Game.

Pride Month is tomorrow.

That doesn't mean you have to do it.

I mean, you should.

Geez Louise. Wait a minute.

Join us on the float.

That's pushing it there, sister man. Speaking of pushing it, pushing into me. I'll have you throw it in the can. The Pope says God.

All right, let's move on. Speaking of the Pope, he's actually the host of Pride Month. In the middle, right square. It's the Pope and Tom Bradovin.

[Mo]

We just got a job hosting something called Pride Month, didn't we, Pope? Spit your genie. Stop saying it. Delicious pasta. Anyway, we're gonna head downtown to big old parade central and we're gonna have ourselves a little play by play. The Pope and me. All of these are people. Are they like the poopy pee pee? That's exactly right, Pope. The poopy Pee pee is what they celebrate. And we're gonna be out there watching them dance around dressed like unicorns. And let's just be honest, a bunch of. A bunch of is all it's gonna be down there dancing around, playing, having a good time and wait.

[Carrie Lake]

Boy, oh, boy.

[Mo]

I gotta tell you something, Mo. Those people.

[Unknown]

I. Oh, God.

[Mo]

Wow.

[Unknown]

We're getting it.

[Mo]

Welcome to the God knows how long parade this is gonna last. At the end, we name a mayor of city and we move on. And I mean, they're coming, coming from all angles of Arizona. You got the. The Show Low Sluts, the Tucson Twinks.

[Carrie Lake]

What is this garbage?

[Mo]

Oh, boy. Twink tunes.

[Unknown]

I know my favorite twinks are the Tukey Twinks.

[Mo]

Turn it this off. It is an affront to God. At least it makes your pee pee go into another man's a pee pee. That's right. Yeah, they try to make each other pregnant through their butts.

[Unknown]

That's not how it works.

[Mo]

Hey, everybody, let's welcome the marching band from Gilbert. This is the Gilbert Gobblers. You mean marching up and down Central, wrecking traffic for a little while? Yeah, he can say it and keep his job and I can't. I don't understand it. And look at that. It's the Merryvale Blowers.

[Unknown]

Oh, God.

[Mo]

Those are some big engines they're blowing out there in Maryvale, I'll tell you that.

[Unknown]

All right, let's move on to the bottom left square. It's Brady. Secret square. Give us a hint. Hello.

[Mo]

Hello. I used to be the drummer of Led Zeppelin until I choked on vomit.

[Unknown]

Oh, God.

[Dick Toledo]

And died.

[Mo]

Well, we got.

[Unknown]

Thanks. Kind of implies that.

[Mo]

Just in case you forgot.

[Unknown]

The bottom middle square. Another birthday we're celebrating. Clint Eastwood.

That's right. How you doing there, sister?

It's good to see you. Good to see you too. You're 94 today.

Happy, right? I just took my license away. I can't drive my Gran Torino around anymore.

Well, I don't think you should be. I saw that latest photo of you and it is.

What are you talking about? You're not supposed to judge someone on how they look there mop and glow.

Aren't you the one that constantly does that?

[Mo]

No.

[Unknown]

What are you talking. But I sh. Nothing more.

[Mo]

Listen to that song. How about that, huh? Beautiful stand.

[Unknown]

I don't remember the words.

[Mo]

Chinese? Japanese.

[Unknown]

No.

Not driving my Grand Torino.

[Mo]

Oh, what a song.

[Unknown]

Pipe down over there, 409.

[Mo]

I got stuff I need to listen to.

[Unknown]

Why aren't you out there watching the Grand Torino?

I'm not.

[Mo]

All right, HMS podcast time again to.

[Carrie Lake]

Let you know where to go for.

[Mo]

Some great comedy in the Valley this week.

[Carrie Lake]

Get up north to Desert Ridge to.

[Mo]

See comedy sets from Leo Gonzalez and Tempe at the Improv.

[Carrie Lake]

You've got Randy Feldface performing. Just Google it and you're gonna have.

[Mo]

To go see for yourself on that one.

[Carrie Lake]

And downtown at Stand Up Live, the very funny Gary Owen entertains you all this week.

[Mo]

For the complete lineups and for tickets.

[Carrie Lake]

Go to standuplive.com desertridgeimprov.com and tempeimprov.com it's.

[Dick Toledo]

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[Brett Vesel]

It's Brett Vesley from Homeburg's Morning Sickness and I want to introduce you to Patrick Riley. Now Patrick Riley is your total home solutions provider where one call does it all look. When it comes to H vac, plumbing or electrical issues, they're certified professional technicians. Deliver quality you can trust and savings you'll appreciate Right now Patrick Riley is a special for you guys. 1500 dollars off a new AC system install plus up to $1100. In addition they offer same day emergency services with licensed professional technicians. Check them out online at patrickridleyservices.com.

[Mo]

Sickness.

[Unknown]

Can I give you 5 bucks so I could drive?

I'm hosting right now. That's afterwards.

Happy birthday to me. 150, 000 years free car wash. Congratulations. You ever seen the the movie Cry Macho where I carry my all across Mexico.

Oh God. What?

That's a boy.

[Mo]

It's the best pet ever.

[Unknown]

K Macho.

[Carrie Lake]

He's got his rooster. You haven't seen it?

[Unknown]

No.

Yeah, there's subtitles. You can watch it.

Okay, good. I have no idea what's going on. All right. In the bottom right square. Lord and savior is here. It's trippy. Oh, God. Are you seasick?

[Mo]

No.

[Unknown]

What's going on?

[Mo]

Back on the wagon, baby. Oh.

[Unknown]

Ready? It didn't take long.

[Mo]

No, no, I wasn't drinking for a little while so I could get in drinking shape.

[Unknown]

Oh, God.

[Mo]

And Now I've dropped 40 unwanted drinking pounds. And I'm back, baby. Yeah, training has worked. Look out, Eastern seaboard. You're about to get pregnant. Yeah, I'm gonna go to the. I'm so potent right now that I'm gonna go to the pride parade and get a few of those guys knocked up.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Mo]

Oh, y. I'm gonna be chumming the waters.

[Unknown]

Oh, geez.

[Mo]

Yeah.

[Unknown]

I don't know if anybody wants to see that or hear about it.

[Mo]

All right, Andrea and Zach are on the line. They've been waiting for a while because they had a throat issue. Andrea, are you there?

[Unknown]

I'm here.

[Mo]

Zach, are you there?

[Unknown]

Zach?

[Mo]

I am. There he is.

[Brett Vesel]

He's the fisting guy from.

[Unknown]

Oh, you were the first.

[Mo]

Yeah, that's why he was taking a second to answer. He had to unload one. All right, Andrea, you're a girl. Pick a square. Go. Oh.

[Unknown]

Let's go. Middle square.

How tall are you, Andrea?

Five, four.

Me too. I'm shrinking. Oompa loom. This is terrible. Pretty soon I'll be shorter than you. Oh, not Mo. So much mo. I'm gonna look like one of your people.

We're the same height.

If you put yellow gloves on up to my elbows, people will think I'm your abuelita.

I mean, you do kind of.

I do have a similar shape.

You do?

Mexican abuelitas. Short. Forgot. No reason. Oh, it's my life now. I used to be a tower of a man.

Yeah.

Somewhere around five, seven, and a quarter.

Sounds like Tinder numbers in the morning.

Oh, man. First thing in the a.m. that's right. A little taller in the morning.

What happens to.

[Mo]

During the day?

[Unknown]

You just gravity and pizza and you get heavier and you kind of bend down.

Okay. The oldest known written recipe is more than 3,700 years old.

That's true. It's for pigeon stew. I've had it several times. I'm making it for Ronnie's birthday tomorrow.

Oh, God.

It's a 4,000 year old recipe.

4,000?

That's right.

Okay, so just after the earth was.

Invented, in fact, according to the Bible, started stewing pigeons.

Yeah, it's true.

[Mo]

Okay, okay.

[Unknown]

So what do you say? True or false?

I say it's foul, but it's true. A pun for everyone. Have fun with that, everyone.

All right. He's saying true. Do you agree or disagree, Andrea? Agree. That is correct.

Don't pinch me about recipes.

I know. Seriously, Zach, pick a square.

[Mo]

Top left.

[Unknown]

Biden.

[Mo]

What are you talking about? I got picked on President of the United States.

[Unknown]

80 million people picked was, you know, better.

Two evils, but here we are.

[Mo]

Hey, you voted for me.

[Unknown]

I did. Cuz it was less.

Mexican lesbian. You voted twice.

[Mo]

It counts as two.

[Unknown]

Are you a citizen? We'll get a third one in there.

If you're a dreamer. Damn.

Pretty sure you're a dreamer.

[Mo]

I was a dreamer. I dreamed.

[Unknown]

You dreamed?

[Mo]

Yeah, I've been in America.

[Unknown]

I think you're dreaming right now.

I am probably.

Okay, open those eyes.

[Mo]

Oh, so real. No, I don't open any more than this.

[Unknown]

All right, let's talk about a year that you. In the year in the 1400s, toothbrushes were made with dog hair bristles.

[Mo]

What? To tell you.

[Unknown]

Oh, no.

[Mo]

This weekend at your gay parade.

[Unknown]

Yeah.

[Mo]

Keep an eye for Pete Booty Jizz.

[Unknown]

He's going to be down there.

How's that?

It's my director of transportation. Oh, gee, that's going to be big.

[Mo]

Peter.

[Unknown]

Peter Boot.

[Mo]

Peter. Boots and Boots. Puss and Boots. Booty Jiz.

[Unknown]

Okay. Okay. You want to write that out?

[Mo]

Yeah, little cup of it.

[Unknown]

God, I just got a horrible taste in my mouth.

[Brett Vesel]

So does he.

[Mo]

Booty Ch. He's always got a horrible taste.

[Unknown]

The guy ate for fun, knows how to travel.

He likes that secretary.

[Mo]

Yeah, he likes that. I don't know what you just said, but it's gross. It's the name of my dog.

[Unknown]

Bussy. Yeah, I think it's Bussy.

[Mo]

He runs. You mean like the trains on top?

[Unknown]

Oh, God.

Okay, I'll say.

[Mo]

What?

[Unknown]

In the 1400s, toothbrushes were made with dog hair bristles. Is that true or false?

[Mo]

I've always had a healthy head of hair.

[Unknown]

Okay, it's not you.

How long has I held that hair? 1400 years.

Okay, just yes or no. Just true or false?

[Mo]

False. True.

[Unknown]

Pick one hair.

[Mo]

True.

[Unknown]

Okay, He's a coma with dog bristles. He's saying true. Do you mean or disagree?

[Mo]

Yeah, dog bristles. I disagree. False.

[Unknown]

Correct. It's hog and horse hair. Circle gets a square. Andrea, pick a square. Let's go. Upper. Oh, no. Upper. Middle. Morgan Freeman. Oh.

Look how fast he gets that music on. I'm very impressed by Brett. People said you wouldn't need it. Toledo. And I scoffed at it. But after one day, I realized how useless that man actually is.

I will say Brett did a better job in typing out everything.

He typed everything out. The Guadalupe squares aren't handwritten for the first time, like it's 1305. You might as well just scrawl each one on a cave wall. The way we do this show, it.

Definitely looks like hieroglyphics.

Anyway, Mo had a question for me, and I was ready to answer.

It's something you're familiar with. The vaginal Speculum used by OBGYNS was invented by Romans around 2000 A.D. otherwise.

Known as the salad tongs.

Yeah, it's pretty intense, too.

[Mo]

What are those, Morgan?

[Unknown]

Salad tongs. Brady, there's a. There's a food out there called salad.

Good for you.

Don't confuse picking it up with speculum stuff.

[Brett Vesel]

He's heard rumors of that, but you.

[Mo]

Pick tuna up with that.

[Unknown]

In fact, we're talking about two things Brady's never seen in front of him. A vagina and a salad. I'll have to say that probably was invented by the Romans. They invented just about everything else. And I assume Roman ladies were probably starting to stink pretty bad, so they split them open with those salad tongs and let it air out like a.

Wet dog, just cracking open. Oysters. Is that what you're saying?

Smelled like roots and stews and the beginnings of Italian food. And I believe they said, o Dios mio, or something similar to that, and then cracked a girl open with the salad tongs and said, let it breathe.

And that's how tamales are made.

And it's no worse than what Andy Dufresne crawled through to get out of Shawshank. Brett and the sisters got it done. Why can't we?

Okay. Are you saying true or false?

I'll say it's true. The Romans invented just about everything.

All right, he's saying true. What do you say? Do you agree? I'm gonna disagree. Too bad. Circle gets a square. It's actually true. All right, Zach, you can take Bill Walton for the win.

[Mo]

Is that it? Oh, yeah. Thank God. I will. Looking at it wrong, I got nervous that Carrie, like, had to come back for a second.

[Brett Vesel]

She can always come back.

[Unknown]

And it comes down to me.

[Mo]

The final square of the day as you throw it down to Bill Walton.

[Carrie Lake]

Who will win?

[Mo]

We don't know. Will it be a girl? Will it be a boy? A question asked all weekend long at the Pride parade. What is it, a girl or a boy? People will say under their breath, not knowing either answer correctly or in the dragon will Fly above the Pride Parade as not to step on anything down there because, yuck, there's a lot of stuff they're putting on the ground.

[Unknown]

Very juicy down there.

[Mo]

Going to the gay Pride parade this weekend to kick off Pride Month. Hopefully somebody goes down on the big man.

[Unknown]

Oh, God. All right, let's get to your question. Congress's first ever official act of war was against Great Britain in 1812. This is not something you want.

[Mo]

Great Britain.

[Unknown]

Look at you.

[Mo]

I liked how you said britain, Britain, Great Britain.

[Unknown]

I had to throw a little Mexican twang on it.

[Mo]

You know, Was that Mexican or just dumb white girl? Some sort of combo. A combination. That's what I love about this America, the diversity where a dumb white girl and a Mexican mispronounce words together.

[Carrie Lake]

And.

[Mo]

Then enjoy a scissor dance at the Pride Parade Friday night. I'll say it's true. Our war with Great Britain was Quite popular in 1812. Who?

[Unknown]

All right, Zacky saying true, dude.

[Mo]

You know, they had to climb many mountains to get there. Ain't no mountain high enough.

[Unknown]

Maybe it's my native America coming out. I don't know.

[Mo]

Brady, can I ask you, were buttons invented back then? Were they invented by the Romans or the British end? I'll say whatever you say is true.

[Unknown]

Zach, he's saying true. Do you agree or disagree?

[Mo]

The question was again, Great Britain.

[Unknown]

Congress's first ever.

[Mo]

Google it.

[Unknown]

No, you're not Googling. Just say.

[Mo]

Just say true or false. It's really not that big a deal.

[Carrie Lake]

You.

[Mo]

You said true, right?

[Unknown]

You said true.

[Mo]

Okay, I will disagree and disagree. Ah. She wins. That's it. Time's up.

[Unknown]

It's over.

[Mo]

That's enough of you people. Somebody's gonna pick Carrie and Trump, and I'm gonna die.

[Unknown]

Anybody want me Moment? I don't know.

I mean, Andrea could have picked the Brady secret square. I don't think she.

[Brett Vesel]

They both win.

[Mo]

We got it. Everybody's got something, okay? And everybody but me wins. I'm a victim.

[Unknown]

You are not a victim.

[Mo]

I've been victimized. I don't like it. Victimized by the system. What are the crimes? Tell me what the crimes are. Free Trump. Freddie's right. Free Trump. Listen to him. Free Trump. A good guy. Brady's a good guy. A good guy. Thank you. DT A good guy. That's right. Brady calls me dt. Dtf he calls me. That's what I like. I like ready. I like ready a lot. Another one. DTF is here if you want to talk to him. No.

[Unknown]

Could you imagine I would be Aggressive.

[Carrie Lake]

Bust down the door, bitch. I'm mad. I'm DTF all day long if it means getting deep inside that old Q tip called Biden.

[Unknown]

Oh, my God.

[Carrie Lake]

I'm gonna be rotten all summer long. Oh, yeah. I'm gonna hit him so hard, you people are gonna put me in jail for desecrating a corpse.

[Unknown]

Necrophilia.

[Mo]

Go away, lady. All right, let's go. Larry's next. We're all done.

[Unknown]

Oh, no, there's more.

[Carrie Lake]

I'm gonna get in that ring and I'm gonna look at Biden and I'm gonna say, you got two choices, friend. Who drop out of the election, or I'm gonna knock all the prunes out of your body with one move.

[Unknown]

She's aggressive.

[Mo]

She's exactly what we need. Let's put her. Let's get her out there. Vice President. Sit around that border. I tell you right now, she is a wall. She's a wall by herself. A wall of sound. Elton John sang about it. Arizona's most powerful rock radio station. He said, fully erect.

[Larry McFeely]

Hey, it's Larry McFeely here with my friend Wayne from Amco. And Wayne, if my car has an extended warranty, do I have to take it back to the dealer for service?

[Wayne]

No, Larry, if you have an extended service contract, you can use it at any amco.

[Larry McFeely]

Well, it's nice to have other options.

[Wayne]

I'll say Amco has dealership quality rental cars, no hassles and faster service.

[Larry McFeely]

Amco does more than just transmissions, right?

[Wayne]

Right. If you need car repairs or hear, feel, see, smell, or even think you have a car issue, call Amco first.

[Larry McFeely]

Just Google Amco for your nearest location. That's Amco double A MCO transmissions and.

[Mo]

A whole lot more.

[Brett Vesel]

It's Brett Vesel from Home brings morning sickness. And I want to introduce you to Patrick Riley. Now, Patrick Riley is your total home solutions provider where one call does it all look. When it comes to H vac, plumbing or electrical issues, they're certified professional technicians. Deliver quality you can trust and savings you'll appreciate. Right now, Patrick Riley is a special for you guys. 1500 dollars off a new AC system install, plus up to 1100 dollars in additional rebates. They offer same day emergency services with licensed professional technicians. Check them out online@patrick rileyservices.com.

[Unknown]

Hey, what's up? It's my friends at the University of Advancing Technology has been ranked the number one best college for computer science for not one, but two years in a row. Which makes total sense because UAT are always on the lookout for those who don't just embrace technology, they live it. From advancing computer science and robotics to cybersecurity, gaming, and artificial intelligence, UAT is where innovation thrives. So if you're ready to lead the next tech revolution, visit uat.edu mo. And don't just study tech, live it.