Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: Best of HMS Podcasts - December 30, 2024

Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, Dick Toledo
Release Date: December 30, 2024

1. Introduction to the Episode

In this special "Best Of" episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness from December 30, 2024, host John Holmberg revisits one of the most memorable and hilariously uncomfortable moments from August 2005. The episode centers around John's candid and comedic discussion about his battle with hemorrhoids, blending humor with relatable struggles.

2. John Holmberg Shares His Hemorrhoid Struggle

John Holmberg opens the segment by recounting a rather intense and amusing incident that led to his current predicament:

[01:36] John Holmberg: "Everybody knew my story about the raccoon and the falling down and hitting the rock and the million dollar shot and shredding my A noose on Camelback Road causing... causing a baby thumb to be stuck up my ass for the last five days. That's what it feels like, Brady. That's what a hemorrhoid feels like. A small child's thumb is in my ass. Hmm."

John vividly describes how an encounter with a raccoon resulted in a series of unfortunate events, culminating in severe hemorrhoid pain. His exaggerated metaphors set the tone for a humorous yet earnest plea for support.

3. Seeking Emotional Support from Co-Hosts

Feeling vulnerable, John turns to his co-host Brady Bogen for sympathy and advice, albeit through a comedic lens:

[02:00] John Holmberg: "Trust me, when there's one in you, you'll be thinking, that's like a little kid's thumb in my ass. You know, that's a small one."

[05:05] John Holmberg: "I just don't want to be one of those guys that carries around the pad, you know? That's my biggest fear."

John's candidness about his discomfort invites laughter and lighthearted teasing from Brady, highlighting the dynamic and supportive relationship between the hosts.

4. Comedic Advice and Reactions

Brady and Dick Toledo engage in a series of humorous exchanges, offering bizarre and impractical solutions to John's ailment:

[07:30] Brady Bogen: "I'll call Dr. Flynn today."

[08:13] John Holmberg: "Looking at John Hornberg's rear end."

[16:25] Brady Bogen: "We're right here in Guadalupe, John. Let's fold you up and hang you."

These exchanges showcase the show's signature blend of humor and camaraderie, turning a painful topic into relatable comedy gold.

5. Discussion on Potential Remedies

Amidst the laughter, the hosts touch upon various (often absurd) remedies suggested by callers and listeners:

[17:14] John Holmberg: "Everybody that's emailed or called has had a different remedy. It's gone from peanut butter to, you know, enemas to everything I'm not interested in."

[17:47] Brady Bogen: "Sandpaper. Just take about 80 grit down there."

The discussion underscores the plethora of advice available, much of which is impractical, adding to the episode's humorous tone.

6. Wrap-up and Final Thoughts

As the segment winds down, John reflects on the lack of genuine support and the comical nature of his situation:

[11:29] Brady Bogen: "I'm gonna puke on myself."

[16:28] John Holmberg: "Suspend you pinata that thing down. I guarantee you candy's gonna come gushing out. But yeah, no."

In his final remarks, John humorously resigns to his fate while maintaining his signature wit:

[17:34] John Holmberg: "Actually come out, I won't know what they do. All I'm saying is... I will die from this. That is my rule."

7. Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully combines humor with personal anecdotes, turning an uncomfortable medical issue into an entertaining and relatable conversation. John's ability to openly discuss his struggles, coupled with his co-hosts' comedic support, makes this "Best Of" episode a standout favorite for listeners seeking both laughs and a touch of vulnerability.

Notable Quotes:

• John Holmberg ([01:36]): "A small child's thumb is in my ass. Hmm."
• John Holmberg ([05:05]): "I just don't want to be one of those guys that carries around the pad."
• Brady Bogen ([16:25]): "We're right here in Guadalupe, John. Let's fold you up and hang you."
• John Holmberg ([17:34]): "I will die from this. That is my rule."

Holmberg's Morning Sickness continues to be Arizona's #1 Morning Radio Show, blending humor, personal stories, and engaging discussions to entertain listeners every weekday from 5:30 AM to 10:00 AM on 98 KUPD.