Holmberg's Morning Sickness - Arizona: BEST OF HMS PODCASTS - WEDNESDAY - March 12, 2025

Host: John Holmberg
Co-Hosts: Brady Bogen, Bret Vesely, and Dick Toledo
Release Date: March 12, 2025

1. Introduction and Setting the Tone

The episode kicks off with the familiar banter among the hosts, setting an irreverent and humorous tone. John Holmberg quickly engages Bret Vesely and Brady Bogen in light-hearted exchanges, preparing listeners for an entertaining mix of news, stories, and comedic commentary.

2. The Brady Report

Timestamp: [00:43] - [01:37]

John Holmberg introduces the "Brady Report," a segment dedicated to unique and intriguing news stories. Despite the sponsorship mentions, the hosts transition smoothly into discussing various topics without lingering on advertisements.

3. The Irish Naval Service's Sole Ship

Timestamp: [01:37] - [04:21]

Bret Vesely brings attention to a curious fact: the Irish Naval Service operates only one active ship named the George Bernard Shaw, likely named after the famed playwright.

• John Holmberg: "Does it say on the paper probably named after the... No one thought to ask them about their one ship that's still in the port."

The hosts humorously speculate about the ship’s namesake, debating whether it honors the playwright or another individual with the same name.

• Brett Vesely: "That's my guess. That's my guess. Just a coinky dink."

They further embellish the story with playful anecdotes about the ship's capabilities and ownership, blending factual information with comedic imagination.

4. Baton Rouge and the Legend of Red Stick

Timestamp: [04:21] - [08:12]

The discussion shifts to Baton Rouge, Louisiana, exploring the origin of its name, which refers to a 30-foot high painted pole known as the Red Stick. This pole historically marked the boundary between two Native American tribes and was adorned with fish bones.

• Brett Vesely: "Louisiana's capital, Baton Rouge, means Red Stick. It references the actual stick that once marked the boundary between two Native American tribes in the region."

John Holmberg adds a humorous twist by personifying Red Stick, suggesting it has a rebellious personality.

• John Holmberg: "Red Stick was also the name of an Indian who didn't care if you were on your period or not."

Their playful exchange highlights the hosts' knack for blending history with humor.

5. Pepsi’s Naval Fleet and the Red October

Timestamp: [08:12] - [09:26]

The conversation takes an unexpected turn as Brett introduces a bizarre historical anecdote: in the 1980s, Pepsi allegedly received submarines and naval ships from Russia as part of a promotion to stock the country with their soda. This fleet momentarily positioned Pepsi as the sixth most powerful military force globally.

• Brett Vesely: "In the 80s, Russia gave Pepsi submarines and other naval ships to cover the cost of stocking the country with their soda."

John Holmberg skeptically analyzes the story, questioning the feasibility and current status of these submarines.

• John Holmberg: "They gave them armed submarines. Not with... But it was capable of firing weapons."

The segment blends absurdity with historical references, creating an engaging and humorous narrative.

6. Balls Out for Bowling: A Nude Bowling Event

Timestamp: [05:05] - [05:45]

Bret introduces the Balls Out for Bowling event hosted by the Pittsburgh Area Naturalists, where participants can bowl in the nude.

• Brett Vesely: "Balls out for bowling is back. The Pittsburgh Area Naturalists are hosting another balls out for bowling event. Where you can bowl in the nude."

John Holmberg expresses mixed feelings about the event, finding it both intriguing and unsettling.

• John Holmberg: "Naked bowlers, Pittsburghers and Pittsburgh."

The hosts debate the spectacle and social dynamics of such unconventional events, blending humor with cultural commentary.

7. Americans' Perception of Their Own Coolness

Timestamp: [05:56] - [07:57]

The hosts delve into a survey revealing Americans' self-perception of coolness:

• Brett Vesely: "Someone pulled 35,000 Americans and asked him, do you think you're cool? Turns out most of us do think we're pretty cool. 53% said they're cool. 29% said not a chance. 17 aren't sure if they're cool or not."

John Holmberg critiques Generation Z, suggesting a dichotomy of excessive confidence and underlying mental health issues.

• John Holmberg: "I don't understand Generation Z or whatever they call them. Either you're suicidal or you're the most confident group. Pick one."

The segment highlights generational differences and societal perceptions, infused with the hosts' characteristic humor.

8. Rookie Sheriff Misconduct

Timestamp: [08:12] - [09:26]

Brett discusses a misconduct case involving a rookie sheriff in Indian River County, Florida, who was dismissed on his first day for repeatedly asking a high school student for nude pictures.

• Brett Vesely: "In Indian River County, Florida, they had a rookie sheriff. On his first day on the job, they had to let him go. He asked a female high school student for a couple of nude pictures numerous times."

John Holmberg and Brett humorously reflect on authority abuse and the hastiness of terminating the sheriff without due process.

• John Holmberg: "You gotta give him a second day. At least he could give him a chance to apologize."

This discussion underscores issues of power dynamics and misconduct within law enforcement, presented through light-hearted banter.

9. Dominique Brown: Fired Rap Artist Teacher

Timestamp: [09:26] - [12:35]

The conversation shifts to Dominique Brown, a teacher from Taylor, Michigan, who was fired from Taylor Prep for her rap persona "Dripping Honey."

• Brett Vesely: "This teacher in Taylor, Michigan, Dominique Brown, got fired from her school. And she says Taylor Prep fired her because she is a rap artist. Her rap name is Dripping Honey."

Despite being awarded Teacher of the Month prior to her dismissal, her performance was negatively affected by parents who discovered her rap videos.

• John Holmberg: "Wonder how she won that."

The hosts mockingly discuss her musical content, emphasizing the controversy between professional responsibilities and personal artistic expression.

10. Chips Ahoy! Cookie Recipe Change

Timestamp: [18:34] - [19:39]

Brett shares the news that Chips Ahoy! is updating its long-standing cookie recipe, aiming to enhance its flavor and texture.

• Brett Vesely: "Chip Hoy is totally changing its cookie recipe. It’s been 60 years. They’re changing it up, mixing it up."

John Holmberg humorously interprets the change, suggesting that the iconic chips are being reduced to a single, larger chip per cookie.

• John Holmberg: "Chips Ahoy are getting better. They've dropped the chips. It's just one big Chip Ahoy."

This segment blends consumer news with the hosts’ playful exaggeration, making it both informative and entertaining.

11. Online Registry for Divorces: A Novel Idea

Timestamp: [19:39] - [20:35]

Brett introduces an emerging trend of creating online registries to assist individuals financially during a divorce. These registries list essential items like appliances and furnishings, allowing friends to contribute and support the divorcing parties.

• Brett Vesely: "There's a new trend for an online registry for people's divorce. Guess the idea is that people can financially be vulnerable at the time of the split."

John Holmberg critiques the practicality of such registries, sharing humorous skepticism about their effectiveness.

• John Holmberg: "I bought my own stuff back. It was a scam."

The discussion reflects on modern approaches to personal crises, infused with the hosts’ signature humor.

12. Walgreens Robbery in Albuquerque: Old West Meets Modern Policing

Timestamp: [22:53] - [27:05]

Brett recounts a recent Walgreens robbery in Albuquerque, New Mexico, where the suspect, Mark Chacon, was apprehended by police on horseback, reminiscent of Old West law enforcement.

• Brett Vesely: "There's a dude that robbed a Walgreens in Albuquerque, New Mexico last. This happened last month. Mark Chacon. He robbed it hard."

John Holmberg and the hosts reminisce about nostalgia for old-fashioned robbery tactics, contrasting them with modern-day policing technologies like body cams.

• John Holmberg: "I miss the old days of robberies where the robber would shout out his gang name as they left."

The segment humorously explores the clash between outdated criminal methods and contemporary law enforcement techniques.

Conclusion

This episode of Holmberg's Morning Sickness masterfully blends humorous banter with a diverse array of topics, ranging from quirky historical facts to contemporary social issues. The hosts’ chemistry and comedic timing make complex and mundane subjects engaging, ensuring that listeners are both entertained and informed. Notable quotes and playful interactions underscore the show's unique approach to morning radio, making it Arizona's #1 choice for an entertaining start to the day.

Notable Quotes:

• John Holmberg [07:11]: "Either you're suicidal or you're the most confident group. Pick one."

• Brett Vesely [18:34]: "Chips Ahoy are finally gonna get a little bit better."

• John Holmberg [22:34]: "You're fired. You're late for work. I don't care that you herkle derkled or have a cute word for why you're not here."

These quotes capture the hosts' humorous and candid perspectives, highlighting the episode's blend of wit and insight.