New Friends, Fake Friends, Old Friends

Summary

Podcast Summary: Hot Mess with Alix Earle Episode: New Friends, Fake Friends, Old Friends
Release Date: January 30, 2025

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Introduction to Friendship Dynamics

In this episode of Hot Mess with Alix Earle, host Alix Earl and co-host Ashton delve deep into the complexities of friendships, particularly focusing on friendship breakups, maintaining healthy relationships, and navigating the evolving social landscapes post-college. The conversation is candid, relatable, and enriched with personal anecdotes that resonate with listeners experiencing similar challenges.

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Reflecting on College Friendships

Alix begins by reminiscing about her college years, highlighting the vibrant social life during the second semester of senior year. She shares her perspective on how college can sometimes feel like a "fake world" dominated by parties and superficial interactions.

Alix Earl [02:12]:
“Second semester senior year, I think was the best time of my entire life... you literally live in this fake world with all of your friends so close to you, and you just party all the time.”

Ashton counters by describing her recent experiences with sorority events and unexpected snowstorms that led to impromptu celebrations, illustrating the spontaneous and lively nature of college friendships.

Ashton [03:11]:
“It was so fun. The energy was just, like, through the roof. Everyone was just, like, hugging and jumping and dancing all day, and it was so much fun.”

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The Transition from College to Post-College Life

The hosts discuss the significant shift that occurs post-college, where individuals begin to carve out their own paths, leading to natural drift in friendships. Alix expresses her disillusionment with the party-centric college scene, contrasting it with her current desire for more meaningful connections.

Alix Earl [04:05]:
“But I don't know, after being out of college, you just forget that, like, being in college is just, like, a fake world... it just doesn't make sense.”

Ashton emphasizes the importance of adaptability in friendships, sharing her excitement about attending Paris Fashion Week alone and the challenges of maintaining friendships amidst life changes.

Ashton [06:02]:
“I'm going to Paris Fashion Week... it's kind of scary. I'm going alone.”

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Navigating Friendship Breakups

A significant portion of the episode centers on Alix revisiting a previous discussion about friendship breakups. She candidly shares her growth over the past year, acknowledging that earlier conversations were made without fully processing her emotions.

Alix Earl [16:03]:
“I just think last year, like, I was pretty new to podcasting at this point... I just think last year, like, I was pretty new to podcasting at this point.”

Ashton complements Alix's reflections by highlighting the challenges of evolving friendships and the importance of not holding grudges.

Ashton [20:07]:
“It's good just to, like, I feel, like, talk it out and be like, hey, so I used to think this, but now I think this.”

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Handling Conflicts and Trust Issues

The hosts explore different approaches to handling conflicts within friendships. Alix discusses her tendency to address issues head-on, aiming for honesty and accountability.

Alix Earl [27:08]:
“I'm talking about someone I'm, like, close friends with. And I basically just didn't say anything... we had a good conversation of, like, maybe where things didn't go right…”

In contrast, Ashton admits to being more of a people pleaser who prefers to let conflicts fade naturally without confrontation.

Ashton [21:07]:
“I've had friendships, like, kind of just, like, fade out or die out. But I've also... never really gotten into, like, a fight or had, like, a real problem with a friend.”

Alix emphasizes the importance of trust in friendships, expressing difficulty in maintaining relationships where trust is compromised.

Alix Earl [36:07]:
“The second I feel like I lose that trust in a friendship, it's really, really hard for me to look back.”

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The Importance of Evolving Friendships

Both hosts agree that friendships must evolve alongside personal growth. They discuss the inevitability of drifting apart as individuals pursue different life paths post-college.

Alix Earl [43:29]:
“After college, everyone kind of slowly starts to shape into who they really want to be. And I think that's a beautiful thing.”

Ashton adds that despite growing apart, enduring friendships can adapt and remain strong through mutual understanding and shared history.

Ashton [44:10]:
“We're still in love with each other and best friends probably till the day we die... it's just funny to see how everyone takes on different paths in life.”

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Building New Friendships

The conversation shifts to the significance of making new friends and embracing diverse friendships. Alix shares her experiences of meeting new people through her work and hobbies, emphasizing that life after college offers endless opportunities to form meaningful connections.

Alix Earl [47:27]:
“You can never have too many friends. And there's no need to limit yourself to, like, a set group or a set wave of friends.”

Ashton echoes this sentiment, highlighting the joy and variety that come with meeting different kinds of friends who enrich various aspects of life.

Ashton [47:09]:
“I have so many different kinds of friends, like, everywhere. And it's just so fun.”

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Final Thoughts and Takeaways

As the episode wraps up, Alix and Ashton summarize their discussions, reinforcing the importance of self-awareness in friendships, setting high standards, and being open to both maintaining and letting go of relationships as needed.

Alix Earl [50:23]:
“It's important to note for yourself, like, what your priorities are in a friendship and the kind of friend that you want someone to be to you.”

Ashton [50:01]:
“Just be aware and, like, hold yourself to a high standard. You deserve better and you should know that about yourself.”

Both hosts encourage listeners to prioritize healthy, supportive friendships and to embrace the natural evolution of their social circles as they grow and change.

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Notable Quotes

• Alix Earl [02:12]:
  “Second semester senior year... you literally live in this fake world with all of your friends so close to you, and you just party all the time.”

• Ashton [06:02]:
  “I'm going to Paris Fashion Week... it's kind of scary. I'm going alone.”

• Alix Earl [36:07]:
  “The second I feel like I lose that trust in a friendship, it's really, really hard for me to look back.”

• Alix Earl [50:23]:
  “It's important to note for yourself, like, what your priorities are in a friendship and the kind of friend that you want someone to be to you.”

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Conclusion

"New Friends, Fake Friends, Old Friends" offers a heartfelt exploration of friendship dynamics, addressing the challenges of maintaining relationships, handling conflicts, and the natural evolution of social bonds post-college. Through their honest and introspective dialogue, Alix and Ashton provide valuable insights and relatable experiences that encourage listeners to reflect on their own friendships and strive for meaningful connections.

Transcript

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[Alex Earl]

Hey, guys. Welcome back to another episode of Hot Mess with Alex. Earl. Wait. Did I just turn that off? How do I get that back on? I'm a hot mess. Oh, my God, I've missed you so much.

[Ashton]

Oh, have you?

[Alex Earl]

I have. And I'm actually proud of you that you're at school and you're doing college.

[Ashton]

That I'm doing. I always do college. I just do everything else at the same time.

[Alex Earl]

You were not there at all last semester.

[Ashton]

Well, I'm literally leaving tomorrow, so. But it's okay.

[Alex Earl]

But can you. Can you recap us on your January in Nola and your snow party?

[Ashton]

Yeah. So it's been actually crazy since we got back. So I got back right before bid day for my sorority, which was obviously super fun. It's also, like, second semester, senior year, so everyone just kind of wants to, like, hang out and have fun. So that's what we've been up to.

[Alex Earl]

Second semester senior year, I think was the best time of my entire life. Like, I don't. It's weird because my first semester senior year, I don't remember. Like, I kind of associate it with almost like junior year. Like, for some reason, it just. They felt like two separate years. And like, second semester, senior year, there is no energy like it because everyone in college is just like, okay, well, this is our last time to just, like, do whatever we want. And I don't know, after being out of college, you Just. You forget that, like, being in college is just, like, a fake world. Like, you have nothing to do besides go to class, and then you just use anything as an excuse to party or drink. And, like, yeah, maybe you're. You're working on the side, but, like, besides that, it's, like, there. It just doesn't make sense. You literally live in this fake world with all of your friends so close to you, and you just party all the time. Like, I am sick to my stomach.

[Ashton]

No, it's so fun. I love it. And then so we were off on Monday because it was Martin Luther King day, so everyone just kept going out all weekend. Like, we were going out on Sunday night, and then classes were online Tuesday because the snowstorm was happening, but we didn't know it was going to be, like, this crazy of a snowstorm. So I woke up being like, oh, I have a 9:30. Like, it's online. Whatever. And then everyone's like, oh, like, classes are getting canceled. Like, and then all of a sudden, I get a text from every single frat group chat that I'm in. They're like, darty, darty, snow, darty, snarty. So every single frat then threw a dartie because it was snowing. And we went to the boot first, and it was just so fun. I don't know why. Like, the energy was just, like, through the roof. Everyone was just, like, hugging and jumping and dancing all day, and it was so much fun.

[Alex Earl]

It's like an unexpected party day, you know? Like, you don't even think about it. And then all of a sudden, you're like, classes are canceled. Let's go crazy.

[Ashton]

No. And it was literally a Tuesday, so it was just really fun. And then. Yeah. So we wanted to keep the vibes going, so me and Lily decided we were gonna have a boiler room at our house after. So we ended up.

[Alex Earl]

Am I old? But what? Like, I know, like, the boiler room in Ibiza, but I just thought that was, like, a club. What's a what? What's a boiler room?

[Ashton]

It's kind of just like a DJ set in the middle of a party, and everyone just, like, dances with the dj.

[Alex Earl]

So you had a boiler room. You're so cool.

[Ashton]

But that was really fun, too. There's so many random people in my apartment, and I was like, I don't know what's going on, but we're having fun.

[Alex Earl]

You posted your house. And I was like, this is not like you. You're like, oh, we're just having a few people over because we were on FaceTime in the middle of this, and I watched your vlog, and I was like, this looks like a rave.

[Ashton]

No, there was so many people there. They were like, hi, nice to meet you. And I was like, hi, what's your name? Nice to meet you. But it was also, like, to my stomach, yeah, you should be here. But that was really fun. And then we've had classes online for the last two days because the snow, like, New Orleans does not know how to deal with the snow because they don't have plows or salt for the roads. So everything's just been canceled. Like, all my workout classes have been canceled. I'm going crazy. Classes are canceled. They keep sending emails. They're like, how to be careful in the snow. They're like, take small steps. Like, hold on to railings. Like, no one knows how to act. They've canceled every flight out of New Orleans for the past.

[Alex Earl]

Does it not normally snow there?

[Ashton]

No, it hasn't snowed like this in, like, a century. Like, it's.

[Alex Earl]

You guys had snow? Like, it wasn't like a drizzle?

[Ashton]

No, it was like a blizzard. It was a lot. A lot of snow. It was actually crazy. Yeah, we've kind of been on, like, lockdown a little bit, but now I'm like. My flights were canceled today because I'm supposed to fly to Paris. So I'm leaving tomorrow morning now.

[Alex Earl]

But wait, why don't you explain to the class what you're doing in Paris?

[Ashton]

I'm going to Paris Fashion Week. No, I'm so excited because I haven't been to Paris since I was there with you when I was abroad for Paris Fashion Week in the fall, and. Really, best time ever. Yeah. I love Paris, and that was the only time I've ever been. And I'm so excited for you. It's kind of scary. Like, I'm going alone. Like, no, I feel like.

[Alex Earl]

That's amazing. Paris is so fun. And, like, Ashton's dream is always. All she wants to do is go do fashion things in Paris. And, like, that's so cool. You're. You're getting to go alone. I kind of like traveling alone sometimes.

[Ashton]

No, I'm kind of. I'm kind of excited. I kind of want to, like, go to a cafe alone, which is really scary.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. Take yourself on a date. Get some good, like, escargot.

[Ashton]

I'm like, bring a book, some. Maybe I'll meet someone.

[Alex Earl]

Maybe you'll meet a cute French man.

[Ashton]

I would love that. I'm going to be like, for you, I'm going to be like Blair Waldorf and go to, like, an art museum and just stare at a painting until someone finds me.

[Alex Earl]

No, you're going to have so much fun.

[Ashton]

No, I'm excited.

[Alex Earl]

I guess we'll see you kind of soon because we're going to be here for Sally's birthday, and then. Am I too old to come for Mardi Gras?

[Ashton]

No, you have to. You have to come for Mardi Gras. You don't have to come the whole time, but you can come for, like, a few days.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah, but I can't come to the college parties, can I?

[Ashton]

Yes, you can, but you probably will be harassed.

[Alex Earl]

I just feel like I can. Like, I feel like last year it was acceptable, kind of. But now I feel like this year I'm giving, like, loser.

[Ashton]

You're never giving loser. It's all about the mindset.

[Alex Earl]

I feel like I am.

[Ashton]

No, you. This is your last excuse to come, though, because I'm still in college. Once I'm out of college, then it's really lame.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. Until I have kids and I literally am like mom and dad and go to all their apartments. I guess I could think about it. You guys let me know if you think I'm too old to go to Marty Gr or not. And, like, I'm not talking about, like, the Marty Gr parades. Like, I want to go to the college parties and I want to go to the boot. We do both.

[Ashton]

We do both. We do the parties, and then we go to the parades.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah, I guess that'll be fun. But I'm excited for. Well, today, the skinny jean launched, which with frame.

[Ashton]

I'm so proud of you.

[Alex Earl]

I. I'm so, like, anxious about it because I'm just like, you know, and so many people are like, what? Well, who is she to, like, say that? And I'm like, I don't know. I just always like the skinny jean. So we decided to do one. Like, you don't have to wear it. Yeah, but I love it. Like, can you. You love it, right? Ashton gave it the stamp of approval, so I was like, okay, fine.

[Ashton]

They're sending me a pair of the Alex black coated ones.

[Alex Earl]

Obviously, I love those ones. And I think. I think the black are my favorite.

[Ashton]

Mm. I love, like, the tag on the back, too, how it says, like, Alix around the corners. I think.

[Alex Earl]

I know.

[Ashton]

It's such a cool detail.

[Alex Earl]

I can't believe I'm on a pair of frame jeans. And you would be really proud of me because I'm upkeeping my New Year's resolution, which was kind of like, I didn't really think it was a New Year's resolution, but it was. But my New Year's resolution in my own head and with Sally was to bring back the boob. Because Sally was like, the boob, Alex. The boob.

[Ashton]

Like, boobies.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah, Bring back the boob. You've heard us say this.

[Ashton]

No, I've never heard you guys say this. Well, bring back the boobs.

[Alex Earl]

Bring back the boob. Because Sally was like, you literally had your boobs tucked away for all of 2024. She's like, you were so, like, modest, and you didn't do anything. Like, your boobs were away. And I was like, wait, you're so right. Because I feel like I was just trying to, like, really figure out what's. What's my style. And then I was like, yeah, I feel like I should be mature. And then everyone's like, well, this is chic. So I was like, okay, that chic. And then people were like, oh, it's chica to be, like, pale. And then now I'm like, oh, my God. Like, what was I doing? I want to be orange, and I want to have my boobs out.

[Ashton]

Just do your own thing. I've been kind of feeling that way, too. Everyone always tells me to lean into being pale, and I'm like, I kind of want to feel hot. I feel like these. These are our days. These are our years.

[Alex Earl]

These are our years to be orange and naked. So I literally found this stylist that I was working with this month because I did, like, four different shoots this month of stuff that, like, I don't even think you know what I was doing.

[Ashton]

Wait, no. But you sent me some BTS pictures, and I was actually throwing up over how.

[Alex Earl]

Gagged. Right? Gagged.

[Ashton]

Like, no, obsessed. I cannot. You're going to break the Internet when these drop.

[Alex Earl]

Celebrate your love story with a Valentine's Day surprise from Pandora Jewelry. I know everyone gets a little stressed out when there's a holiday, and it's like, what do I get someone? What are you giving? And I mean, this could be for a romantic relationship. Could be family, Just a gesture of love. But Pandora has versatile designs that let you express your unique connections in meaningful ways. And it could be a best friend or significant other. Pandora helps you honor the bonds that make life richer and more meaningful. I've personally seen these Pandora engraving necklaces all over my for you page. It's your own handwriting. It looks super, super cool. I also think that's like a fun activity to go do with someone. And I always think jewelry is a great gift. I always love when Braxton gets me jewelry because it's something that I'll wear with me every day. You always have it with you no matter where you are. So it really makes the feeling last from first sight to forever. And on Valentine's Day and every day. Be love. Shop Pandora Jewelry today in store or [e-mail] I know it's the new year and everyone's feeling very motivated. They have a lot of goals for themselves. And personally, something for me, just like insane that happened over the past year was being able to sell this hot mess merch to you guys. We've done that all through Shopify. I actually started using Shopify way back when when I had my second job working at a boutique in New Jersey. But Shopify is a commerce platform that allows you to start, grow, manage a business. It can be like a side hustle or a storefront. You can sell online or in person. It's locally, globally, direct, wholesale, desktop, top to mobile. They make it super, super easy. Like, trust me, if I'm doing it, you can do it too. And I know we all live on our phones with Shopify, so you can like tag and sell your products across all major social media platforms and you can sell wherever your customers are. I personally started using Shopify. I think is this was like my sophomore year of high school and it was always so inspiring to me. The boutique I worked. I'd always wanted to be able to sell my own sweatsets one day because that's what they sold. And being able to do this is just so crazy. With the help of Shopify. So this is your sign to start journey as an entrepreneur. Head to shopify.com hot mess and see how easy it is to get started. So I found the stylist and I. I feel like usually when I'm working with stylists, it's hard because, like, I don't know, they're sometimes more mature. Like stylists, they just don't get your.

[Ashton]

Vibe sometimes or what you want.

[Alex Earl]

Well, stylists sometimes have like their own opinion. I mean, obviously they have their own opinion, but, like, sometimes they're very opinionated and like, they want to dress you how they want someone to be dressed. Like, they don't want to dress you for how you want to dress yourself. So I've been trying to really, like, work with different people and find like, who will be like, collaborative with me. And I was working with this guy for a shoot, and I literally, like, picked up the tiniest thing off this rack. Like, he shoved it all the way to the end because he was like, oh, sorry. I don't even know why we brought that. Like, I don't think you would want to wear that. I picked up this tiny little top, and I was like, wait, I've never seen a more perfect top in my life. And so then we hired him for, like, the rest of the shoots we did for the month. And now I'm trying to work on maybe, like, possibly working with him because he. He was so fun in everything that I sent you and all these pictures. So, yeah, he. And he's really fun. And I'm going to be on the COVID of a magazine that comes out tomorrow when this episode airs. It'll be out, so go check it out. And we had so much fun with the wardrobe in it. And I'm like, I kind of want to dress. Like, I just want to dress fun. Like, why? I don't want to wear just what everyone else is wearing. I just kind of want to, like, be out there and do my own thing. So watch out, 2025. We're bringing back the boob.

[Ashton]

The boob. I like it. I wish I. Yeah. Really bring out.

[Alex Earl]

I really. I really hid them and. Yeah, I mean, I guess. Do we have anything else crazy we have to catch up on?

[Ashton]

I mean, no. I did my first live on Tick Tock last night, and I was actually having a panic attack, but I was like, I can't end it now. I just started.

[Alex Earl]

Oh, my gosh. Wait for a second. Can we talk about TikTok getting banned for 10 hours?

[Ashton]

Oh, yeah, that was. They're like, just kidding.

[Alex Earl]

Just really quickly. I just want to address it. Okay. Because I am e embarrassed.

[Ashton]

No. Everyone was, like, doing the same thing as you. Don't be embarrassed.

[Alex Earl]

I'm not embarrassed because I don't regret it. If, like, the app didn't come back, I wouldn't regret it. But the fact it came back so fast, I was like, are you joking me? Like, what kind of stunt was this? Like, you really. My emotions. It definitely was a stunt.

[Ashton]

Yeah.

[Alex Earl]

But, like, it. It just made me annoyed because, like, I felt like if I wasn't really vulnerable, like, if I followed me and I just kind of left and, like, someone who, like, got their whole start on this app, like, only gets to do the cool things because of this app and the followers and the audience I have there and my girls, like, if I just left without, like, saying Goodbye or thank you or doing a whole thing, I feel like I'd be like, ew, she doesn't care about us. Like, she's rude. So as I was crying, although it was a little, like, dramatic, I was like, you know what? I'm gonna, like, show them, because I want everyone to feel like a part of this, and I want them to know how much I care about them. And then the app came back 10 hours later, and I'm like, really?

[Ashton]

You don't need to do this damage control, though. Like, no one's like, oh, that's so embarrassing.

[Alex Earl]

I'm not doing damage control. I'm just. I'm just explaining how I feel.

[Ashton]

You're just a little E. It's okay.

[Alex Earl]

I'm a little E. And that's okay.

[Ashton]

We're all a little E sometimes. Don't worry.

[Alex Earl]

Okay. But other things that we're talking about today, I think, because it's almost been a year since I did the friendship breakup episode last year, and I wanted to kind of revisit this topic now that we also have Ashton. And I personally feel like a lot of my. Not a lot of my opinions have changed over the past year, but I think, like, that's the beautiful thing about, like, podcasting and growing up with you guys is like, my opinion's gonna change sometimes, and I feel like I want to revisit this subject. And you guys always ask about the subject or, like, friendship breakups or friendships just fading in general or what to do. And I personally think if we're going back to last year's episode, and I'm just being really honest with you guys, I don't not mean anything I said. I just think I said things too early on and, like, didn't process my emotions, if that makes any sense. Like, I feel like a lot of the beginning of me podcasting, I felt very, like, tempted to kind of, like, expose myself in a way where I just wanted it to be really, really entertaining for you guys. I was like, okay, well, if I'm not, like, really giving them, like, the nitty gritty secrets of my life, then, like, this show's not going to do well, and, like, there no one's going to care about it. So I just feel like I spoke on things before, like, fully processing them. And I think along with that, like, I just honestly, like, behind the scenes, putting out that episode last year was so anxious. Like, I was sick to my stomach. I was just like, I know that I didn't really say anyone's names, but I Just was like, I know stories.

[Ashton]

Yeah, yeah.

[Alex Earl]

And, like, these. And that's the thing is like, I guess, like, you guys don't really see the Earl girls behind the scenes. Is like, when we talk about stuff online, like, they. They listen and they know. Like, you guys don't know who we're talking about, so it, like, doesn't really matter to you. But, like, the people that we're talking about know we're talking about them. And, like, what were we two weeks ago when we talked about our middle school crush who gave me a rock? He, like, DM dashed and was like, I'm so sorry I made you feel this way. And I'm like, fudge. Like, we're not meaning for everyone to listen, right? Like, it's. It's so hard when people, you know, listen to this. I'm like, oh, shit. Like, I forgot. I'm, like, putting this out in the public.

[Ashton]

No, in. I'm like, well, no one knows who we're talking about, but the people know, and the people that know them probably.

[Alex Earl]

Know the people that we're talking about know. And, like, people like, we go to school with, like, you know what I mean? So it's like, things go around.

[Ashton]

No, this is actually really funny because Roe's dad is here right now, and we were getting lunch today, and I guess we, like, briefly mentioned him. We were like, he's so funny on the podcast. He's like, you don't know how many people came up to me, and they were like, Mr. Keegan, like, you're so funny.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah, I like.

[Ashton]

He was like, I loved it.

[Alex Earl]

I just want to. Yeah. And sometimes I'm like, it's not to, like, call people out or, like, bash people. It's just more so, like, I want to share real life stories with you guys, but it's a hard balance of, like, the people who I'm talking about sometimes know I'm talking about them. And, like, it just feels weird and feels off sometimes. And, like, I just think last year, like, I was pretty new to podcasting at this point. Like, I was only like, four or five months in, and I just feel like I was speaking before, like, fully processing my emotions. And, like, I think I just felt pressured, I guess, to kind of do that or be entertaining or want to get views. And, like, I really don't feel that anymore. And I would say that's one thing that's changed for me over the past year.

[Ashton]

Yeah, I also just feel like it's really hard with being someone who talks about their life. On social media in general, because we're still young, we're still growing, our opinions can change, and what we say, like, can mean something completely different in a year than, like, what it means to us now. And people will, like, hold what you say. Hold you accountable for what you say. That's what I'm trying to say. And, you know, but your opinion can change. So sometimes it's good just to, like, I feel, like, talk it out and be like, hey, so I used to think this, but now I think this.

[Alex Earl]

Well, of course, like anything else that we talk about on this podcast, Ashton and I have drastically different ways of going about things when it comes to friendships or being upset in a friendship.

[Ashton]

Yeah. Like, I don't think I've had, personally, a dramatic ending to a friendship like you have with someone that I. I consider really close with me. I've had some friendships, like, kind of just, like, fade out or die out. But I've also. I've never really gotten into, like, a fight or had, like, a real problem with friend. I consider, like, a best friend and someone really close with me. But I also think part of that is me being, like, a people pleaser. And I like to avoid conflict sometimes. So I feel like if there is ever a little tiff, I'll, like, let it blow over. Or if in general I just, like, want to stop being friends with someone, I'll, like, let it just, like, fade out on its own instead of actually, like, confronting someone and trying to, like, start a problem or fight it out.

[Alex Earl]

But have you ever had someone, like, really wrong you that your friends?

[Ashton]

No, that's also the thing. Yeah. Which I also think I. I've had the same friends, best friends since, like, my entire life. Like, Kathleen's been my best friend since preschool. And then I met more friends in high school that I'm still friends with today. Same with my college friends. Like, we're all still friends. And then it's like, the people. There's been other people in my life that I've been friends with, and they're, like, still people that I'll, like, say hi to or catch up with occasionally. But not, like, my core best friends I've never had that were, like, one of my genuine best friends has ever, like, wronged me or done anything to a point where, like, we needed to end our friendship.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah.

[Ashton]

So that's.

[Alex Earl]

I would say, like, my. I'm also, like, super loyal with my friends, though. Like, I have Sally and Isabella, who are, like, my best friends from high school. They've Always been my best friends. And then I have, like, all my girls from college, and I've now met new people and have more friends. But, like, I guess I don't know if I've ever had, like, a best friend. Best. Best friend that I've, like, really, really fought with. Like, that. But I think definitely more so just, like, really close friends in general.

[Ashton]

I think that a friend who, like, wrongs you or really, really screws you over, that's not a true friend. And I feel like, at least from what I've seen, like, we both have, like, pretty good judge of character to where we're not gonna be, like, consider someone a best friend if they, like, seem a little shady. Like, I know you've had some, like, new friends, and I've been like. Like, I don't really know how I feel about them, like, blah, blah, blah. And you're like, no, they're cool. And then I might have been right a few times, but that still wasn't someone that you were like, oh, that's my best friend, you know?

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. I mean, I don't fight with my friends. I feel like the last time I fought with my friends was giving, like, early. Early high school, when it's, like, everyone's just, like, catty and, like, doesn't know what's going on and fighting in group chats. But, like, I don't fight with my friends. And if I feel like I need to fight with you, then, like, that's where I'm just like, okay, we're not gonna be friends. Which is, you know, sometimes could be a little controversial because I. I'm pretty, like, blunt, and I. I don't think that's changed. Last year, I told you, like, when someone wrongs me or if I don't think someone's good for my life, like, it's pretty hard for me to, like, change my opinion.

[Ashton]

You're a grudge.

[Alex Earl]

I'm pretty. I'm not a grudge holder. No, I'm not a grudge holder, actually, because that's something that. Over the past year as well, I feel like I was holding a lot of grudges. So as I was going to therapy and just working on kind of, I guess, like, letting go of the grudges or, like, I didn't want to hold that, like, hatred, I guess, in my heart anymore. So I, you know, came to terms of peace on my own. But I was like. I feel like I also just, like, would like to express this to the other person, and I just don't want There to be this, like, animosity towards each other when we see each other. So someone that, like, we were close. Maybe not so close anymore. So I ran into said someone, and we, like, had a brief talk, and then we ended up getting dinner. And just, like, I think we had a good conversation of, like, maybe where things didn't go right and, like, where we both maybe, like, messed up. And I think it was a good conversation. And for me, I was just trying to, like, really make. Not make amends, I guess, but, like, I mean, I guess, yeah, just, like, not. There's no need to, like, have so much hate. There's a difference of remembering what someone's done to you, and there's a difference of holding a grudge. Like, and I think I was getting those two confused because I would always be like, oh, I'm a grudge holder. But, like, I really worked this past year to, like, forgive. Because I also think that, like, I don't know if this makes any sense at all, but think about, like, a fight, and you hear, like, one girl says, this one girl says that, like, both people think that they're right, you know? So it's like, at the end of the day, it's like, it is just someone thinking that they're right, you know? And, like, maybe you don't see eye to eye on something, and, like, that's okay, and you don't need to be best friends with that person. But it is kind of a crazy thing that, like, there's so many fights where both people think that they're right. And it's like, is someone ever truly right and is someone truly wrong or what's going on?

[Ashton]

And that's even. I think that speaks to just, like, having a fight with someone means you're kind of holding a grudge or, like, holding some kind of, like, anger, and you like me. I mean, I'm not saying I'm right. I let things go way too easily. I don't like to fight. I never, ever. Like, I avoid fighting at all costs. And I think that's why, like, I've never had, like, fights with friends. Like, I don't. I don't, like, fight with anyone, really. I just. It's not worth it to me. Like, I'd rather, like, take a step back and be like, okay, whatever. Like, I'm just gonna let it go kind of thing where, as people, like, you might need to, like, really hash it out. And I don't really know that that's a good thing that I do, you.

[Alex Earl]

Know, I Think sometimes that allows people to kind of walk all over you. But I also think it's good for, like, keeping the peace with people, because sometimes I'm not keeping the peace. But, like, I don't really like to fight. I just like to someone to know, like, why we are no longer going to be so close, you know? Like, I'm like, I just want them to know that I know I'm that type of person. And I feel like I did try it out this year. Like, there was someone that I found out a lot of terrible things with, and I was like, all right. Like, this is not someone I'm going to be friends with anymore. And kind of. I think we talked about this on the podcast, like, a while ago. Like, a few, maybe. Like, this was, like, September or October, and everyone thought I was, like, talking about Briana Chicken Fry, and I was like, what?

[Ashton]

Like, no, I'm.

[Alex Earl]

I'm talking about someone I'm, like, close friends with. And I basically just didn't say anything, which was very unlike me. Instead of, like, immediately finding out, like, texting them, calling them out right away, I didn't say anything for a while, and then they ended up saying something to me, like, last month and.

[Ashton]

Wait, you didn't tell me.

[Alex Earl]

I did not. Yeah, I didn't really choose peace. I was kind of like. I was kind of like, fudge, this here's why I'm mad. Blah, blah, blah. Like, I mean. And I feel like I never answered.

[Ashton]

I feel like that's valid, though. Like, in that case, you can be like, you fucked me over. I know what you did. I don't want to be friends anymore, but I don't think. Yeah, sometimes. I don't know. It just depends about how you go about it.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. Like, you've never really had someone wrong you. I just don't believe this.

[Ashton]

No, I don't.

[Alex Earl]

What about those girls in high school? Well, that was, like, funny. I feel like I've fought people for you.

[Ashton]

Yeah. Like, Alex has done a lot of the. The fighting in my life for me because I won't do it. And she's like, you need to stop being such a pushover and letting people walk all over you. And I'm like, you're right. But I'm still not going to say anything. So there was this one time in high school. I remember it was my friend group and then the girl friend group in the grade above us. We would always, like, go out to parties together and stuff because we were, like, all friends with the same guy group. And we were all like, you know, like party friends, like, like casual. Not like we were all best friends, but there was this incident where the girl group in the great above us, one of them was in our DM group chat on Instagram. And this was the time of like finstas, where everyone was posting on their finsta, like super casually. They were like, before Snapchat private stories. So people would use them as like, their Snapchat private stories. So we would send things that like, they would post in our Instagram group chat DM and like, talk about them. And one of them was reading everything we said about them in our group chat, which we did not say nice things, honestly, it's really proud of this. But also like, then they were posting things on their fences, being like, like verbatim, like things we would say about them. And we're like, oh, my God, it's like they're in our group chat. And then it started this whole big fight. And then they were like being really mean to us, which was kind of valid. But I think you yelled at them or something because I was like a ball of anxiety over this. I remember I was like trying to study for midterms when all of this was blowing up. And I was literally having a panic attack in my room because these girls were texting at me and yelling at me. And I was like, oh, my God, I don't know what to do. And then when did you even like, what did you do?

[Alex Earl]

I don't remember. I just remember this incident and like, wasn't it one of them were in your group chat somehow?

[Ashton]

Yes, one of them.

[Alex Earl]

One of them was log. One of the older girls was logged into one of the younger girls Instagram somehow. So she was reading their whole group chat, which I feel like is kind of an invasion of privacy. And no offense, no offense. I feel like a lot of people kind of like talk and groom chats, you know, it's like, I don't know, you're just kicking with the girls.

[Ashton]

Yeah.

[Alex Earl]

No need to bully people. But like, sometimes you're just like, huh?

[Ashton]

Yeah. And that was like the most insane thing to ever happen in my entire life, honestly, was the DM incident. We still talk about it. Like, the girls that like, go to school with Catherine, we always like, joke about it now because we're like, it's so funny. It was so crazy because we were both just like, so horrible to each other during the time. But now we're all friends, so it's fine.

[Alex Earl]

It's crazy.

[Catherine]

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[Alex Earl]

Yeah, I just feel like, I don't know why I get so like defensive or need to like let people know.

[Ashton]

What does I like. I wish I had that in me.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah, I don't, I don't know what I'm trying to think of. Like, you know, I'm not just trying to agree with myself here. I'm like, okay, what's my problem? You don't have any problems.

[Ashton]

You're perfect.

[Alex Earl]

I'm kidding. I'm perfect. No, I definitely probably have. That has to be like deep rooted issue from something. I don't know. I just feel like I hate. I hate if someone does something and you don't like them. And I hate like faking it. You know what I mean? Like, I just don't like this, like, oh, let me just pretend to like you or let me just pretend to be your friend because I'm like, that's fake. We're not friends. If we're not friends, I don't want to say hi to you. Like, I Don't want to have to pretend like I like you when you are a bitch to me. So I feel like that's where it comes from. I'm just like. I feel like this is, like, fake, fake news when we're, like, not being friends, you know, I'm like, I don't like you. Like, I'll probably just unfollow you. Like, I don't know. I don't want to fake it and be like, oh, girl, love ya. When I'm like, we don't like each other.

[Ashton]

No, I'm definitely a fake bitch. Like, I could hate someone and, yeah, I'd still be like, hi.

[Alex Earl]

Like, how are you? Good to see you know, I can't stand that. I can't stand that. Or like, I'm just like. I would rather just say it to your face and be honest and let you know how I feel.

[Ashton]

Yeah.

[Alex Earl]

But maybe sometimes I do that too much. And what I will say is, what I worked on this past year was my grudge holding. Because I felt like. I just felt like, you know, when you don't like someone, so you feel like you just hold such, like, a hatred in your heart. So I didn't like all this, like, angsty grudges I was holding in my heart. I felt. And I hate when you, like, you know, run into someone somewhere and it's awkward and it's like. Like, I don't know, I just wasn't loving that. And I also think the hard thing about friendship breakups, which. I don't know if anyone else can, like, relate to this, but, like, there's. I mean, I guess this is kind of with, like, anything in life, but there's always a point where I go back and I'm like, oh, my God, like, am I crazy? Like, was I bad? Because obviously when you're fighting with someone, like, I don't know why breaking up with a friend is harder. And, like, losing a friend, I think is so much harder than, like, losing a guy because you just. The line is so much more blurry. Like, you don't. I. I don't know. I feel like with a guy, we're like, okay, he cheated. He does this. Like, I don't want to marry him. Like, goodbye. And it's like, you're one and done. Soulmate, person, ride or die. Like, friends come in all shapes, forms, sizes. They can be so many different things to you. And I think it's hard knowing for yourself, like, where to draw the line of, like, this is what I want a friend to Be or not. So I think for me, like, what it comes down to is, like, I. Because I started to feel, like, guilty at times and just like, losing people and talking with my therapist, I was like, oh, my God, like, am I a bad person for, like, cutting this person out of my life? Like, I feel like I did something wrong and, like, I feel guilty for it. And then I kind of had to take a moment for myself to be like, okay, like, what are my priorities as a friend? And like, what do I look for in a good friend? And I think for me it's just someone that you, like, trust. I think trust is a really, really big thing for me in friendship and like, someone who will support you. And I think the second that I feel like I can't trust someone or I find out that something's like, going on behind my back, like, for me, I just. I don't love that because I'm like, we're friends. Like, we should be able to be honest with each other. We should be able to tell each other everything. We should be able to support each other and be there for each other. So the second I feel like I lose that trust in a friendship, it's really, really hard for me to look back.

[Ashton]

I just feel like for me, I've been lucky enough to have really good friends where they haven't, like, broken my trust and they've always been really loyal to me. So I would say, like, oh, if anyone, like, is talking about you behind your back or does something bad behind your back, like, cut them off, like, they're not a good friend. But that's obviously easier said than done because I've never personal had to do it. But it is, like, it's something you really, really need to be aware of. And if a friend, like, does kind of like you over, I feel like you really, really need to be, like, aware of that and have them, like, re build your trust. Like, you can't just go back to, like, and like, forget about it. Like, I feel like it's something that you need to be aware of and know that, like, you're like, this person has done something to me once, then it's possible they could do it again. And it's really hard, though, especially just, like, when you just love them and you want to be friends. But some people can just be shitty people. And that's, like, really hard to accept, I think sometimes.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. Or I think another reason that I've kind of drifted away from friends maybe has been, like, seeing their morals or, like, the way Maybe they talk about other people or the way that they comment on certain things. You know, that's like another thing for me where I'm like, okay, like, morals. Like, I feel like you at least have to be like a good person.

[Ashton]

Yeah. That's something where I just, like, kind of, like, let myself, like, slowly distance from that person. I'd be like, hey, like, yeah, like, we're friends. Hi. But I'm not gonna be like, I trust you. I'm gonna tell you all my secrets. I'm not gonna, like, confide in you about personal things.

[Alex Earl]

So let me paint you an example. If you found out that one of your roommates, let's say Al, someone came up to you and was like, Alyssa was talking all this about you. Like, half of these things that are like, lies about you, like, going and saying the most obscene stuff. And they were like, she literally hates you. Like, da, da, da, da, da. Like, what would you do? Like, how would you react to that? Because I'm like a cut off, done by. I'm gonna be like, we're not friends anymore. But, like, how would you go about that?

[Ashton]

I think I would have. I'd have to be like. Like, confront her about it. Even though I hate confronting people about things. But as like a best friend, I'd have to be like, what the. You know, and kind of be like, what do you mean? And I feel like that.

[Alex Earl]

Would you forget her?

[Ashton]

Like, honestly, no. But I don't know. It's hard because, like, I'd want to, but depend. It depends on, like, what they say about it. But also they could be like, well, that person's lying.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. And that's the thing that's hard is when you talk to them, it's obviously, no one's gonna be like, oh, yeah, sorry. I was such a shitty person. Which honestly, I respect so much more. Like, I think if a friend can take accountability, I'm like, okay, we all make mistakes. Like, I'm not a perfect person at all. Like, I make mistakes just as much as the other person, you know? So, like, I feel like taking accountability is like, a way where, like, if you can talk something out and someone can be like, I admit I did that. I don't know why I did that. That wasn't my best moment. Da, da, da. I value as a friend, whatever. But what I can't stand is when you talk to someone and they're like, like, no, I didn't do that. Or not this. Or, like, that's not how it went. And I'm like, yes, it was. So what do you mean? And then it's hard for me to forgive someone because I'm like, we can't even have an honest conversation. How do I trust you to be honest behind my back?

[Ashton]

And I think if it were the case where my best friend were, like, I did that and like, I don't know why, like, that was like, really, really bad. I'm sorry. I'd be like, okay, sure, like, if we can still be friends. But it would, it would, like, the friendship would be different. Like, I wouldn't trust them as much or like.

[Alex Earl]

And I think too, sometimes that's kind of hard in like, school because you're in a position where you're kind of around the same people a lot. So I think it's hard, like in college when you're like, oh, I don't want to fight with someone because I'm gonna see them.

[Ashton]

Yeah.

[Alex Earl]

On my Monday, Wednesday, Friday class, and every single party that we go to. And it's just like, you don't want to have that, like, animosity towards someone. So I feel like when you're in school especially, it's really, really hard to like, cut off.

[Ashton]

Yeah, it's definitely, like, easier if it's a friend that, like, I feel like now being in college and having long distance friends, it's like you have to make time to see those friends so that I feel like if someone like that were to me over, I would just probably like never make the time to see them again unless they really, really wanted to and like, really, really wanted to make up for what they've done. And I would kind of just like let that fade out after, like, I would still confront them, but like, after that it would just be like, okay, probably won't see you again. Something like that.

[Alex Earl]

I don't know. And, and when. But when you're around them, there is sometimes when you just have to like, know in your head, like, I don't like this person or I'm not gonna trust them fully. Yeah, yeah. Like, I'm not gonna tell them everything, but, like, I'm gonna be around them a lot. But you always have like your antennas up of like, okay, this isn't the best person. Because I feel like that is unfortunately how it goes a lot of the times when it's like you can't be having to blow up a fight with someone every time you're around them. And if you're going to be around them a lot, you just have to like, make peace. Say what you got to say, but then, like, keep your antennas up.

[Ashton]

Antennas. Yeah, I feel like you can be civil.

[Alex Earl]

Antennas, keep those antennas up. Ladies.

[Ashton]

Yeah. But I feel like, yeah, in that case, you can just, like, be civil with them, but just be aware of the fact and, like, keep that in your mind going forward.

[Alex Earl]

And I do think a lot can be resolved when you do sit down and talk with someone. Not all the time, but I do think sometimes a lot of fights that can come in friendships, especially when you're younger, I think is, like, miscommunication. So I think. And I don't know why it's different with, like, girls and guys, but, like, if my boyfriend were to do something to upset me, I'd be like, like, you. What are you doing? Hello. But it's awkward sometimes when it's a girlfriend because, like, you don't want to, like, be so mean to their face or, like, call them out. But, like, I will say that's like, one thing of with Sally, because we've been friends for so long. Like, I will literally, like, if one of us is, like, doing something to, like, piss the other off, like, we just say it right to their face. There's no fight. There's no cattiness. There's no need for me to, like, talk behind her back and be like, sally's really, like, pissing me off. Like, whatever. I'm literally just like, hey, Sally, you're pissing me off. And she's like, hey, you're pissing me off. And we're like, okay, I love you.

[Ashton]

Yeah. I feel like that's where a lot of, like, problems and friendships can arise, is when you start, like, talking about them behind their back.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. You just don't, like, confront the issue with them.

[Ashton]

Like, you've had friends that you've just kind of, like, distanced with, like, from, like, middle school, high school, like, growing up into college, you know? Like, I feel like friendships change and people can change so much.

[Alex Earl]

There's so many friends I've had that, like, I was maybe best friends with at one point that we aren't best friends anymore. But we never had a falling out. We just kind of, like, faded. And I think it's so weird. And I wonder if anyone listening, like, also feels this way, like, post grad or maybe like, two years post grad is everyone kind of goes down their own path. And I think especially after college, because in college you're kind of like, you're not made to all be the same person, but everyone kind of has this, like, same lifestyle routine. Going on. And then like, after college, it's really like, okay, this is your life. This is your time to, like, it's.

[Ashton]

Like, what you make of it.

[Alex Earl]

Do a job you want to do, find hobbies that make you happy, hang out with who you want to hang out with. So, like, everyone kind of slowly after college starts to, like, shape into who they really want to be. And I think that's a beautiful thing. But I also think sometimes you realize you're like, whoa, like, we're so different as people, but, like, we are so close and we're best friends, but, like, we're just different people. Like, do you have that with any of your friends? Where you could feel like you see differences and you guys are like, what you like to do and you're. You could, like, flash forward three years and see you guys just, like, in all different places and even, like, where you like to live and what you want to do with your life.

[Ashton]

I mean, yeah, definitely. I feel like even with my friends that are, like, long distance, just like friends from high school that, like, we all went to different colleges, like, we all, like, do our own things and even just like, in the way, like, like, Catherine's so southern now with, like, her Bama boots and stuff, like, because she goes to Bama. And I'm just like. It's so funny because, like, we are so different when you look at us like, where we are, but we're still in love with each other and best friends probably till the day we die. But it's just funny to see how, like, everyone, like, takes on, like, different paths in life and, like, you can be so different and still be really close to someone, which I think is really special.

[Catherine]

Do you feel overwhelmed when it comes to makeup? Charlotte tilbury has bottled 30 years of artistry into easy to choose, easy to use beauty products. They're flattering for everyone everywhere. That's why she's the queen of Glow. Her rigorous standards ensure that every product is designed and formulated for performance like nothing else on the market. Take her iconic Hollywood flawless filter. With one product, you can blur, smooth and illuminate the look of skin. It's skincare infused for clinically proven hydration for up to 24 hours. From Red carpets to influencers bathrooms, her legendary icons have gone viral for making everyone look and feel like the most beautiful, confident version of themselves. Charlotte Tilbury is performance you can trust. It's legendary for a reason. You can use code CT podcast15 for 15% off on Charlotte tilbury.com New account holders get Free delivery. This ad is brought to you By Charlotte Tilbury USA customers only valid until March 2, 2025. For full TNCs and exclusions, see the Charlotte Tilbury website. This cold and flu season Instacart is here to help deliver all of your sick day essentials. Whether you're in prevention mode and need vitamins, hand sanitizer, and that lemon tea your nana swears by, or you're in healing mode and need medicine, soup, and a lot more tissues, simply download the Instacart app to get sick day supplies that reinvigorate or relieve. Delivered in as fast as 30 minutes, plus enjoy. $0 delivery fees on your first three orders. Excludes restaurant orders. Service fees and terms apply.

[Alex Earl]

And sometimes you're friends with people and you're like, I feel like if we met today, I don't know if we would be like. Like, I don't know if we would, like, find each other in a room and like, gravitate towards each other. But, like, we've been friends for so long that we're good friends. And I think that's what's really cool about friendship. And what goes to show is, like, it's different than. It's just different than a boyfriend. Like, a boyfriend is someone that you like. One person. Yeah, for most, it's one person that you are very compatible with. You see your guy, you see yourself having, like, the same life. It's just. It's much more, like, distinct. And I think like, a friend is just. It's so broad. It's just someone you enjoy spending time with, talking with. Or maybe it's someone's like, they just know so much about you and you are kind of just there for each other in this, like, unspoken type of way.

[Ashton]

I don't know. I feel like I have so many different friends and so many different kinds of friends, like, everywhere. And it's just. It's so fun. Like, you know, you can be like this person with like, your one crazy friend, or you can be like, wholesome with your other friend and, like, go make pottery with them. And like, I have like, all different kinds of friends, and I think it's so, so fun.

[Alex Earl]

It is. And I think making friends is cool, too. We're still making new friends. Life isn't over. Like, we have just gotten so close with Julia and Payton, and I know some I can like, sometimes catch a vibe with. Well, sometimes I'm wrong. Yeah. And sometimes wrong. But I feel like there's type of people where, like, I meet them once and I'm like, okay, so we're going to be friends. Like, I could just tell we're going to be friends. Like, that happened with exaggerate. I met him literally one hour, and I was like, okay, so, like, do you want to come with me to Coachella? Because, like, you're an amazing time.

[Ashton]

Like, I remember when I met someone, and literally two hours later, I was like, this is my best friend. I was introducing him as my best friend, and I was like, wait, I met him two hours ago? But that's just, like, what's so fun. I just love meeting new people.

[Alex Earl]

You can never have too many friends. Can keep. There's no limit, and there's no limit, and there's no need to limit yourself to, like, a set group or a set wave of friends. And I think if you're in a position where you're kind of feeling like, I am friends with people, but I kind of feel different. Like, I feel. I don't know, like, I guess for me, which I think work is, like, a big part of my life, and what I do for work is not normal by any means. So a lot of my friends. I mean, like, pretty. All my friends that, you know, I went to college with, and we're all just, like, talking about our days or work or what's going on, and everyone's talking about their, like, 9 to 5, and I'm like, oh, like, you know, it's just like, it's hard for me sometimes to, like, relate. So it is cool to have those type of friends. Like Jake, who's someone that we.

[Ashton]

He gets it.

[Alex Earl]

He gets it. We talk about work a lot. We help each other, and I think there's different types of friends for different types of things sometimes. So if you're in a position where you're like, I feel different than all my friends, and I feel like they're not understanding me, and I feel like they just aren't. I don't know, like, we aren't connecting on the same level. And maybe you're, like, going off on your own path. Like, that doesn't mean you don't have to be friends with them anymore. You can still make new friends. And I think finding friends through hobbies or through what you really enjoy in life is really, really important because you want friends to enjoy those moments with.

[Ashton]

I mean, I feel like that's, like, part of the reason we became such good friends is because of, like, you've helped me with, like, work and social media and things. Yeah.

[Alex Earl]

Us, like, we're friends. Are we Friends.

[Ashton]

Okay, maybe not. Are we gonna have a friendship breakup?

[Alex Earl]

Yeah.

[Ashton]

Is there something you have to tell me? I just think the biggest takeaway is to, like, notice. And don't forget when your friends are. If they've done shady things, you know, and kind of just, like, hold yourself to a high standard and don't let people walk all over you. Like, I might, but, yeah, I think.

[Alex Earl]

It'S important to note for yourself, like, what your priorities are in a friendship and the kind of friend that you want someone to be to you. I think you should be that kind of friend to other people. And, yeah, I think depending on the situation, sometimes it's a lack of communication. Sometimes the person's just a psychopath, and you can't really see yourself being friends anymore. And. Yeah, I mean, I'm still stuck on this fact that, like, when people fight, there's two people that think that they're right. And I'm like, I don't know. Why does it make me sad for both people then? Because I'm like, you both think that you're right. So, like, is. Is there always someone wrong in a fight? Or, like, is someone always delusional? Or is it always just, like, you don't see eye to eye? Or someone. Maybe you're both wrong? Like, what is it? I would like to.

[Ashton]

Well, sometimes I. Sometimes it's not seeing eye to eye, but I do think sometimes it's people. Sometimes people won't admit when they're wrong.

[Alex Earl]

So you think that there's always one person wrong and one person right?

[Ashton]

Well, it's. It's very situational, you know, you can't just say that for, like, a broad spectrum of every fight ever.

[Alex Earl]

I know, but it's just crazy to me that, like, both people always think that they're right. Like, anytime you fight with someone, I feel like both people think that they're right.

[Ashton]

Any fight I've been in in my life has just been, like, something you really, really need to talk through and see both sides, and then it can always come to, like, a conclusion. You. If you ever just, like, cut off a fight, like, and, like, don't let someone, like, fully, like, explain themselves, or they're like, whatever. Like, I'm done. Like, you have to be like, no, like, we're talking about this. Like, what are you mad about? And really get down to, like, the bits and pieces of it, and then you can, like, fully resolve it. Because if you both, like, genuinely care for each other and you're fighting about something, then, like, you have to get down to the bottom of it, and then you can work it out. But if one person's just like, being a. Or like, they don't really like you, then that's different, you know?

[Alex Earl]

Yeah. I think that's my biggest thing is, like, when people don't take accountability. This person that, like, I had a falling out with a few months ago, and I was like, hello? And they were like, no, I did not do any of that. That's not who I am. Like, da, da, da. And I'm like, okay, so you're just like, twisting and trying to manipulate my mind. But I don't know, I feel like I'm kind of just like more at peace with things this year. Like, there's no need to have all this hatred. I'm just like, we just weren't meant to be on the same path.

[Ashton]

Mm.

[Alex Earl]

Yeah.

[Ashton]

I'm a big believer in whatever is meant to be will be. You can't force anything too hard, you know, you can't force someone to be your friend. You can't force someone to like you. You can't force someone to be nice to you. So it is what it is. But I do think, just in general, friendships are so important in life. But I don't think you should be holding on to a bad friend just because you want a friend. There's so many opportunities to make friends in life that, like, if someone's treating you like you shouldn't, like, stay with them just because you want friends. And I know it can be really hard in, like, middle school and high school where people are just like, really bad and they're like, I just want friends. And they'll stick around with people that kind of suck. But, you know, again, it's very situational. But just be aware and, like, hold yourself to a high standard. Like, you deserve better and you should know that about yourself. And don't let people be mean to you and walk all over you, because you can find friends in anything you do in any aspect of life.

[Alex Earl]

I feel like that was a great catch up. And yeah, I love you guys. Don't get too down on yourself. And if you are the person that messed up, it's okay because I know sometimes I'm stubborn too, but it is okay to be like, oh, yeah, that was shitty of me, or, oh, yeah, I shouldn't have done that. Like, it's okay to take accountability and it honestly will probably only make things better. Any. Any last words, Teeny?

[Ashton]

Love you.

[Alex Earl]

All right, love you guys. I'll see you next week. Don't forget to subscribe. Follow this podcast wherever you're listening or watching it. I love you guys. Bye. Wait, did I just turn that off? How do I get that back on? I'm a hot mess. Where'd you get those shoes? Easy. They're from dsw.

[Ashton]

Because DSW has the exact right shoes for whatever you're into right now. You know, like the sneakers that make office hours feel like happy hour, the.

[Alex Earl]

Boots that turn grocery aisles into runways, and all the styles that show off.

[Ashton]

The many sides of you, from daydreamer to multitasker and everything in between. Because you do it all in really great shoes. Find a shoe for every you at your DSW store or dsw.com.