A View to a Kill LIVE! w/ Matt Gourley and Matt Mira (HDTGM Matinee)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "How Did This Get Made? - A View to a Kill LIVE! w/ Matt Gourley and Matt Mira (HDTGM Matinee)"

Release Date: January 7, 2025

In this lively and in-depth live episode of "How Did This Get Made?", hosts Paul Scheer, June Diane Raphael, and Jason Mantzoukas are joined by Matt Myra and Matt Mira from the "James Bonding" podcast. Together, they dissect the James Bond film "A View to a Kill," exploring its numerous flaws, questionable plot points, and memorable yet perplexing scenes. This summary captures their key discussions, insights, and humorous critiques, enhanced with notable quotes and timestamps for a comprehensive overview.

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I. Introduction to the Live Episode

Paul Scheer kicks off the episode by welcoming listeners to the live session of "How Did This Get Made?" He briefly addresses potential technical issues inherent to live recordings and promotes his new Adult Swim infomercial featuring Ray Wise.

Notable Quote:

• Paul Scheer [02:16]: "He's armed, he's dangerous, he's geriatric. In a movie that makes as much sense as its title. We saw 'A View to a Kill.' So you know what that."

---

II. First Impressions and Overall Assessment

The hosts share their initial thoughts on "A View to a Kill." Paul Scheer expresses a surprising affection for the film, despite its reputation as one of the weaker Bond installments. Jason Mantzoukas echoes this sentiment, highlighting his nostalgic connection to the movie.

Notable Quotes:

• Paul Scheer [06:02]: "This movie is ingrained in me. Every scene was great."
• Jason Mantzoukas [06:10]: "Personally, I'm in the same boat as you. This movie is my origin story."

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III. Character Analysis

Max Zorin and Grace Jones’s Character

The discussion delves into the portrayal of Max Zorin, the film’s villain, and Grace Jones’s enigmatic character. Paul Scheer criticizes the clichéd and pun-filled names of the Bond girls, contrasting them with Grace Jones’s more unique portrayal.

Notable Quotes:

• Jason Mantzoukas [12:12]: "Zorin was a cosmetics manufacturer... we saw multiple blimps in this movie."
• Paul Scheer [18:35]: "Grace Jones is the most recognizable person in the world. She is a giant woman with a bizarre hairstyle."

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IV. Plot and Logical Flaws

The hosts critically examine Max Zorin’s plan to flood Silicon Valley to monopolize the microchip industry. They point out the inherent flaws, such as Zorin inadvertently targeting his own customers instead of his competitors.

Notable Quotes:

• Paul Scheer [50:11]: "He wants to flood Silicon Valley to disrupt microchip production so he can own all the microchips."
• Jason Mantzoukas [53:19]: "His whole plan, he doesn't see the folly in it. It's just an exercise for him."

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V. Technical and Cinematic Elements

Critique is directed at the film’s technical aspects, including the overuse of blimps and reliance on green screen technology, which detracts from the movie’s authenticity and believability.

Notable Quotes:

• Paul Scheer [12:25]: "This movie is drowning in blimps."
• Jason Mantzoukas [19:38]: "They paid for the cheap rights to a Beach Boy song."

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VI. Specific Scene Critiques

Butterfly Show Sequence

One of the most discussed segments is the butterfly show, which the hosts find unrealistic and indicative of the film’s lack of coherence. They debate whether the butterflies were meant to be real or were merely special effects, expressing concern over animal cruelty implications.

Notable Quotes:

• June Diane Raphael [32:55]: "The butterflies aren't real... it's just amazing how they're presented."
• Paul Scheer [36:19]: "Those butterflies have no choice in performing that act. You know what? And that is ammo. Cruelty. And they do not belong."

Awkward Sexual Encounter

The awkward and uncomfortable sexual scene between James Bond and Grace Jones is another focal point. The hosts critique the lack of chemistry and the bizarre portrayal of intimacy, highlighting how it undermines the film’s quality.

Notable Quotes:

• Matt Myra [60:04]: "He throws dildos... they are just wrestling around until they get their juices flowing."
• June Diane Raphael [87:01]: "There's nothing. But with Tanya Roberts, he does. He acts like a daddy to her."

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VII. Cinematic and Cultural References

The hosts make cultural references to other films and elements, such as the Duran Duran song associated with the movie, drawing parallels to works like "Mr. Magoo" and "Blue Man Group" to illustrate their points.

Notable Quotes:

• Jason Mantzoukas [26:56]: "It's the best song. It really is one of my favorites."

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VIII. Audience Interaction and Alternate Opinions

Addressing listener questions, the hosts juxtapose their harsh critiques with more favorable audience reviews found on platforms like Amazon. This contrast highlights the subjective nature of film appreciation.

Notable Quotes:

• Paul Scheer [107:56]: "I love collecting and watching James Bond movies during the winter when there's nothing nor anywhere to go."
• Jason Mantzoukas [112:33]: "I recommend this movie with every drop of blood that pumps through my heart."

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IX. Final Thoughts and Recommendations

Concluding their discussion, the hosts express a consensus that while "A View to a Kill" has its entertaining moments, its overall execution is flawed. They recommend viewing select scenes rather than the entire film, citing its length and unnecessary plotlines involving horses.

Notable Quotes:

• Jason Mantzoukas [112:33]: "I recommend this movie with every drop of blood that pumps through my heart."
• Matt Myra [113:20]: "I wouldn't watch the whole movie. Especially, you can fast forward anything with horses in it because it's not relevant to the rest of the movie whatsoever."

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X. Conclusion

The episode wraps up with acknowledgments to guests, shout-outs to contributors, and promotions for future episodes. The hosts encourage listeners to engage on social media and support their ventures.

Notable Quote:

• Paul Scheer [110:21]: "We'll see you next time."

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This detailed summary encapsulates the essence of the live podcast episode, offering a structured and comprehensive overview of the hosts' perspectives on "A View to a Kill." By highlighting key discussions, notable quotes, and critical analyses, it serves as a valuable resource for those who haven't listened to the episode.

Transcript

[Scott Aukerman]

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[Paul Scheer]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

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[June Diane Raphael]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

You should check out the show.

[Scott Aukerman]

I, the host, Scott Aukerman, have a light hearted conversation with famous celebrities like Jon Hamm, Allison Williams, Phoebe Bridgers, Bob Odenkirk, just to name a few things. Go a little off the rails when different eccentric characters drop by to be interviewed as well. Each week is a blend of conversations and character work from your favorite comedians.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

As well as new hilarious voices.

[Scott Aukerman]

Comedy Bang Bang, the podcast. Listen every Monday, wherever you get your podcasts.

[Paul Scheer]

Hey everybody. Today is a live episode of how did this get Made? Which means there might be some things in it that are visual, there might be some things that, you know, sound quality issues, whatever. And what I say to you is deal with it. It's a free fucking podcast, okay? And also wanted to let you guys know that my new Adult Swim infomercial is up online. Just type into YouTube, Frank Pierre presents. Frank Pierre's Resort and Casino Hotel. Anything like that. Frank Pierre presents. I hope you enjoy it. It stars the amazing Ray Wise. Enjoy the live episode. Enjoy that. Let's do it. He's armed, he's dangerous, he's geriatric. In a movie that makes as much sense as its title. We saw A View to a Kill. So you know what that.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

How did this get paid?

[Paul Scheer]

Hello, people of Earth and hello people of Largo. We are in our Los Angeles home, Largo at the Coronet Theater, one of my favorite best theaters in Los Angeles. Thank you guys. Give it up. Very excited for tonight. We are getting into the canon of James Bond. So many movies, so well. A lot of them are good, but a lot of them are bad. Let me introduce my co host. Please welcome June Diane Rayfield. Please welcome her. Hello. How are you, June?

[June Diane Raphael]

I'm doing well, thanks.

[Paul Scheer]

Please welcome Jason Mantzoukas. What's up, jerks? And in a very special pod.

[Matt Myra]

Do you want me to start it?

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, you want to hold on. In a very special podcasting crossover event, very similar to the night when everyone had a blackout, like on Friends in Seinfeld and Caroline and the City, we have our two two guests today. From the James Bonding podcast, please welcome Matt, Myra, and Mat. For those of you who cannot see this, which is a lot of you, they are in full tuxedos. And honestly, for those of you who can't see it, so are Jason, June, and I.

[Matt Myra]

And girly has a James Bond A View to a Kill mug. No, not mug. Glass.

[Paul Scheer]

No, that is like a glass that was given out at Arby's, I imagine, right?

[Scott Aukerman]

So Arby's was handing out licensed highball glasses.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

If there's a God in heaven.

[Paul Scheer]

Guys, I'm very excited to have you here as you are fans of James Bond.

[Scott Aukerman]

Ultimately, I would go so far as to say experts.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, this is very good, would you say, and your expert opinion, because this is a question that I had about picking this movie. Is this the worst James Bond movie?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

By the worst, do you mean the best?

[Paul Scheer]

Well, look, this is honestly the movie that I like. This is my first James Bond movie. We were talking about this backstage. I remember the first one I saw as a child. So sorry, what? The anger.

[Scott Aukerman]

What were people just indignant that he had missed previous movies?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This just turned into judgment at Nuremberg.

[Matt Myra]

Somebody's basically like, fuck you, Paul.

[Paul Scheer]

There was a period of time when I remember telling my dad, like, ugh, I don't want to watch a Sean Connery James Bond. Roger Moore's the best. Like, I didn't understand. I didn't get it. This movie is ingrained in me. Every scene was great. And I know that a lot of people go, this may be the weakest. And other people believe that, like, License to Kill is the weakest. Where do you guys fall?

[Scott Aukerman]

Thunderball. Oh, yeah, that's a. That's a. Two hours of being underwater and fighting slowly.

[Paul Scheer]

That's a good call.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Personally, I'm in the same boat as you. I was. This is in my DNA, this movie. I was raised on this movie. I saw it so many times in the theaters and then it was on cable for what seemed like years on constant loop. And so much so, like the Duran Duran music that was associated with me liking girls in middle school, which then I associated with Tanya Roberts and Grace Jones. And so, like, now I only like mulattos that fight jujitsu. And it's just.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, so in your mind, Tonya Roberts and the same woman, they turned one. They turned into your ideal female partner.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Absolutely everything.

[Scott Aukerman]

So they could not act at all.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This movie is my origin story.

[Matt Myra]

You are going to be alone forever because the woman you are looking for is impossible to find.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Unless I actually land Tanya Roberts. And Grace Jones, which is entirely impossible.

[Matt Myra]

I think they're both on Tinder.

[Scott Aukerman]

I just imagine them sadly swiping right. Just waiting, waiting.

[Matt Myra]

Oh, look at this. Who's this? Grace? No, thanks.

[Paul Scheer]

Now, June, I want to. June comes from a different perspective on James Bond. Where did. Like, now, how many James Bond movies have you seen?

[June Diane Raphael]

Oh, including this one, I've seen three.

[Paul Scheer]

Okay. And I showed you the other two in the last six months.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's correct.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's correct.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, the last two years.

[Paul Scheer]

Two years. Okay. So you've seen Casino Royale and Skyfall.

[Matt Myra]

And the Daniel Craig Casino Royale.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. Not the Woody Allen ones.

[Scott Aukerman]

Or the CBS made for TV black and white movie?

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, yeah. This is obviously the first time I've seen this movie, so I'm coming at it from a real different perspective.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The proper perspective, probably.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, I think I'm just watching it. Like, I have no kind of emotional historical connection to it. I'm just watching it as a movie. And that was interesting.

[Matt Myra]

How did it hold up against that criteria? Is this a movie?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

On paper?

[Matt Myra]

On film?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

I just. Being younger, I don't think it occurs to you how old Roger Moore is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

57. He's.

[Paul Scheer]

He celebrated his 57th birthday during the filming of this movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He doesn't look a day over 56, though. It's incredible. He's looking good.

[Matt Myra]

He seems older than 56.

[Paul Scheer]

If that's.

[Matt Myra]

If you. Because here's the. The reality is, if you had been like, isn't it crazy? He's 68 in this movie, I would.

[Paul Scheer]

Have been like, yeah.

[Matt Myra]

And if you had then been like, isn't weird he's 73 in this movie? I'd be like, I believe that as well. That's how bad he looks.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, it's crazy.

[Matt Myra]

For his 57 years, you think about.

[Scott Aukerman]

Tom Cruise hanging off of a skyscraper and he's 50 years old.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah. Liam Neeson is kicking ass all over the place, and he's. I don't know what, Like a very old age at this point. He's like fighting wolves. And he's in it well into his 60s, I believe.

[Paul Scheer]

Well. And the fights are slow.

[Matt Myra]

Oh, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Like, they're so. So that. Like, you're like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They're age appropriate.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, they really. That taken. Should look like this. By all intents and purposes, taken to.

[Matt Myra]

There are some pretty slow fights.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

If that movie's taken. This movie's just given.

[Paul Scheer]

Taken. Where do you fall? I'm sorry, Just to get us all on the same page, where do you fall in the James Bond. Like, were you a James Bond fan?

[Matt Myra]

I was a. I was a medium James Bond fan. Not super into James Bond, but I certainly watched, like, my first James Bond. I'm older, I believe was Moonraker. That was the first one that I remember being like, oh, yeah, I'm into this. This is cool.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He's only 54.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah, exactly.

[Paul Scheer]

Moonraker, in case you don't know, is James Bond in outer space.

[Matt Myra]

Yep. I was like, I'm on board for this. And then I watched some of the Sean Connery ones. Cause they were always on tv. I thought they were fine. I hated Timothy Dalton.

[Scott Aukerman]

Hey, I agree.

[Matt Myra]

I was the kid who was the nerdy kid who was like, well, if they had let him out of his Remington Steele contract, I was Brosnan.

[Scott Aukerman]

I was also on board.

[Paul Scheer]

Me, too.

[Matt Myra]

I'll go on.

[Paul Scheer]

Right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm not a. Just his James Bond, then.

[Matt Myra]

Eventually, though, is terrible.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. Thank you.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. Because by the time he got there, he was almost 57.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Too old by the time they let him out of that Remington Steel contract.

[Matt Myra]

Yep. Just think of what we could have had. We could have had. We could have had young Pierce Brosnan as Bond, and we could have had young Tom Selleck as Indiana Jones if television executives had been smart.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, the thing. The beautiful thing about Pierce Brosnan is that he was walking out the door to the press conference to announce that he was James Bond, because NBC had until that day to renew Remington Steele. And his phone rang, and NBC was like, oh, we're gonna pick it up. We got a season. So he hangs up the phone and just puts his keys down.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That would be like if MacGyver was heading to set. And they're like, hey, Indiana Jones is in the bag. Don't worry.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, what? How is that like that?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Because. Because Brosnan's Remington Steele was like. If MacGyver was Indiana Jones, it's the.

[Scott Aukerman]

Poor man's James Bond.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You know what I mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

Okay. I don't see that. I've never seen Indiana Jones do anything with gum.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, you have a point there.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, let's get into this movie. The first thing that strikes me is I've seen every Bond film. This is the first one that, like, the title card comes up and goes. The name Zorin is not associated with anyone. This did not happen. Which makes me go, did it?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you know why? I can tell you why.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Zorin. I think it was spelled like Z O, A Z O, R A N was a, like, cosmetics manufacturer. And they're like, well, we can't get sued by a cosmetics manufacturer, so we have to label this.

[Paul Scheer]

I like knowing that Christopher Walken could have been misconstrued as a cosmetics manufacturer in this movie.

[Matt Myra]

He could have been.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah, he could have been.

[Matt Myra]

By the way, his business portfolio is so varied to include microchips, horses, oil, oil pipelines.

[Scott Aukerman]

Blimps, obviously. Blimps.

[Matt Myra]

Yes. Oh, and obviously airships.

[Paul Scheer]

And by the way, there are multiple blimps in this movie.

[Matt Myra]

Yes.

[Paul Scheer]

There's just not one blimp.

[Matt Myra]

This movie is drowning in blimps to.

[June Diane Raphael]

The point where Paul and I watched the movie together. And I feel like about 45 minutes in, we had about a 15 minute discussion just about blimps while the movie was playing. Like, so how do blimps work exactly? It's really a giant.

[Paul Scheer]

June was like, I'm. I would be scared to go in upland.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm glad to hear that you guys watched together. This is a movie for lovers.

[Paul Scheer]

Like that Matthew McCon quote from Days and confused. The girls keep on getting younger, but he stays the same age and I feel like. Or something. I know it. Bastardized.

[Matt Myra]

By the way. Total McCon.

[Paul Scheer]

Thank you. Nailed it.

[Scott Aukerman]

To buy a Lincoln.

[Matt Myra]

People on the podcast were just like, Holy shit, McConnell.

[Paul Scheer]

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[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, this is the one where his story is. Why he hung it up after this one is because he was literally older than Tonya Roberts mother at this point. And they talked about it on set and I think that's when he finally went, I'm done. But now they just announced one of the new Bond girls is Monica bellucci and she's 50 years old. And it's fantastic. Very good. I think three years older than Daniel Craig and the oldest Bond girl by far. And so it just shows you how times have changed. It's great.

[Matt Myra]

Gross won't see.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, guys, did you know Gross and gross.

[Matt Myra]

According to this movie, her name is menopause, right?

[Scott Aukerman]

What?

[Matt Myra]

So the Open Hot Flash.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's. That's her character name.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah, these are all character names. Mena Paws and Hot Flash.

[Paul Scheer]

By the way, this movie has the laziest name of like, like all the Bond girls have like these like kind of like punny names. And this, the girl's name is Jenny Flex.

[June Diane Raphael]

What does that mean?

[Scott Aukerman]

It's like they were literally out of name. So they were like, fuck, May Day.

[Paul Scheer]

She'S flexible in bed. Pussy Galore to Jenny Flex.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's coming off the heels of Octopussy.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, so yeah, they really were hitting the bottom. So James Bond opens up in a snow scene where he invents snowboarding.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yep, he sure does.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

These people know, these people understand and they appreciate.

[Matt Myra]

I felt like this, this opening scene is like, like as if they were like, well, let's just let Warren Miller direct this because it's all like half assed shredding guitar to like terrible ski footage.

[Scott Aukerman]

But it's also.

[Paul Scheer]

Wait, not shredding guitar. They put the fucking Beach Boys. It's not.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They put like a rehaben version of it.

[Scott Aukerman]

But it's not even David Lee Roth's cover. No, it's some other shittier version.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They paid for the cheap rights to a Beach Boy song.

[Paul Scheer]

Here, I'm going to play you what it sounds like.

[Matt Myra]

The reveal is amazing when it changes because first he's skiing and that's when it's electric guitar.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well then he blows up a snowmobile.

[Matt Myra]

With a friend and one of the. One of the tracks where he skis off the snowmobile lands next to him.

[Scott Aukerman]

And he invents the X Games.

[Matt Myra]

Here we go.

[Paul Scheer]

He looks at it like, huh, Dink and the future of youth. Here we go up there. He goes snowboarding.

[Scott Aukerman]

Those KGB guys are like, what is he doing?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The transition into the score is really awkward too.

[Scott Aukerman]

Watch this.

[Matt Myra]

I really want it to be like a ski movie. Like, look who decided to drop it.

[June Diane Raphael]

Here's what's weird about it too. It's as though him snowboarding makes them forget how to ski across the water.

[Scott Aukerman]

He's fucking Jesus.

[Paul Scheer]

And then right back. Then he runs right back at.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But it's important to note that this entire cold open is filmed in Iceland, set in Siberia, and Roger Moore never set foot in snow. All of his scenes were filmed at Pinewood Studios in England.

[Paul Scheer]

So everything green screen.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Anytime you see a man doing something, it's not him.

[Paul Scheer]

The.

[Matt Myra]

The.

[Paul Scheer]

All.

[Matt Myra]

The all.

[Paul Scheer]

When he even walks across the room, it's a stuntman at this point.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's what his wife wrote in his divorce papers.

[Matt Myra]

This movie has aggressively recognizable stunt men in it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, oh, yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Like, it's like. It's like they're. That's just another man. Well, visibly much shorter and stockier.

[Paul Scheer]

This is. We'll put this up on the website, but that's Tanya Roberts, stunt double man.

[Matt Myra]

It looks like the killer bob from Twin Peaks.

[Paul Scheer]

It's. He's weari a blonde wig. I have never seen. I have never seen a more disturbing image.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It is rare that we get a James Bond surprise. And that was really something.

[Paul Scheer]

You can see. You can, you can. This is the clip that we have from the movie. You can actually see Tanya Roberts.

[Matt Myra]

Oh, hey, gorgeous. What's going on?

[Paul Scheer]

And here's the reveal.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's that mix of Grace Jones and Tonya Roberts that I was looking for. I found it.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, so. And the first scene is, you know, he, you know, escapes. This is like when James Bond is like past cheeky. Like it's like an iceberg submarine. He jumps into an iceberg submarine with a British flag. Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

That looks. Is in the shape of a straight up dick.

[Paul Scheer]

And it is. It's not. Does not seem to me like a military vessel. It just seems like a ship.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, it is absolutely a ship. There is no need for the plush, like, comforter on the bed that comes up.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. On one side it's like full on submarine. Like, I'm looking at dials, I'm looking at cameras. Boop, boop, boop. Super hot girl in the air, of course. And then he just like presses a button, the bed comes up. But oddly, all the remote boats for the. For the submarine are also on his side. So you can kind of like you're describing a ship.

[Matt Myra]

I was like, I'm sad there wasn't a scene where Q explained to him, like, the potential of it. Where he was like, now pay attention, 007. So you can be masked within the iceberg. But also, it's a fuck ship. Here you go. This button here raises the bed and this is a vibrating fuck shit button. This is. This takes dildos out of everything.

[Scott Aukerman]

Click this three times, it'll sterilize her. Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

And then Bond is like, are there condoms in here somewhere? And he's like, of course not. You never use condoms. You're James Bond. You're giving AIDS to everyone.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, also, when he makes the move for the ship to sort of tussle a bit and she falls on top of him, it's a strange moment because I was more worried for him. Oh, his bones. And like, he's not.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, that's so true.

[June Diane Raphael]

He's not. Well, so weird.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Also, reveal hit my heart in a major way right now.

[June Diane Raphael]

I was, I was like, oh, no, but there's an old man in there. Careful. Please be careful.

[Matt Myra]

Seriously, young woman, young woman. Don't crush the brittle man.

[June Diane Raphael]

Be careful. Really.

[Paul Scheer]

I would have actually liked to see that sex scene play out because it would have been so awkward and a.

[Matt Myra]

Lot of just like, I'm so sorry this never happens. You can keep trying, but it's not going to work.

[Paul Scheer]

He also, he also, like, when he lands in the ship, like, you know, he's flirting with the girl, of course. And he knew all along James Bond was on this mission. He had the tiniest of backpacks, kind of like Indiana Jones satchel, like about that on his back. And he uses it to pack a giant thing of beluga caviar. Now, as an adult, I know that that was like thousands of dollars. Like, the smallest ones are hundreds. Like, this is like a cheese wheel of caviar. And a bottle of vodka was in his backpack the entire time. It doesn't seem appealing to me. Like a giant, like, what are they gonna do? Like all the way back, he's gonna.

[Scott Aukerman]

Straight vodka and eat caviar.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah. And he's gonna. That girl.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Because it's what she does as a near 60 year old man.

[Paul Scheer]

But I just picture them, like scooping out caviar with their hands.

[Scott Aukerman]

They're like, did you pack utensils? No, put it on my dick.

[Paul Scheer]

It sterilizes that you won't get pregnant.

[Matt Myra]

I want to eat eggs tonight.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, and I do think that's sort of the overall vibe that I walked away from the movie with, which wasn't like, oh, yeah, I'm rooting for this guy and I want to see him go on, like, all these crazy journeys. It was more like, oh, he has a problem. And he really has to be careful because this could totally get out of hand. It's a. It's like Mr. Magoo, but it's like, ye. With the vodka and stuff. When he pulled the vodka out, I felt like, oh, that's a really big bottle of vodka.

[Matt Myra]

For example, were you worried that he might not be able to sustain the temperatures of the hot tub that he found himself in? Did that concern you at all? Like, ooh, no. At his age, his body temperature should not be up where it is at this point.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, this brings us to now. That's the opening sequence, of course, but. And then the main plot begins. And I was watching Duran Duran song. Well, yeah. Oh, yeah, the Duran Duran song. Do you got anyone have any comments?

[Scott Aukerman]

It's the best.

[Matt Myra]

It's awesome.

[Paul Scheer]

The best song. I mean, it really is one of my favorite. That and Live and Let Die are my two favorite songs.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's the only Bond song to ever become a number one hit.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, really?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Even after Skyfall?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Wow.

[Scott Aukerman]

Fucking experts.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. You guys really brought the heat.

[Matt Myra]

Tuxedos.

[Paul Scheer]

We get to the main plot and June, you asked me this question numerous times, which was, what's happening? What's going on? I don't understand what's happening? What's going on?

[June Diane Raphael]

We replayed multiple scenes.

[Paul Scheer]

I mean, I rewind that to watch it again. It was that a million times.

[Matt Myra]

It's tough because this movie is fucking long. So to even imagine watching scenes more than once.

[June Diane Raphael]

And I did it in numbers of times.

[Paul Scheer]

I said to June last night at the end of the movie, I said, actually, I think this. Actually, I said, for a long movie, it's paced really good.

[Matt Myra]

Oh, God.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm with you. I'm afraid to admit this. This is the James Bond movie I've seen the most times, I think.

[Paul Scheer]

Me too.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Because I have this thing where it's. I like my James Bond movies really good or really bad. And this movie is as bad as the best Bond movies are good. And I. I agree with that.

[Scott Aukerman]

The movie opens and there's a scene after the Duranduran song plays. We go back to MI6, and I would like to have been in the room for God knows how long while the senile guy from Q branch drove his little creature around. Like, there's a front of the Prime Minister of England.

[Matt Myra]

There's a robot dog in this movie.

[Scott Aukerman]

That has no reason to be in there, except at the end of the movie.

[Matt Myra]

Joe.

[Paul Scheer]

It comes Back. But it's like. But it's also like, this is an advanced spying technique. No, it's a cumbersome, weird looking robot dog that anyone would be like, what the is that robot dog doing in here? He is not like. It was not subtle. It was not sneaky.

[Scott Aukerman]

It could not have looked like a more unnatural object.

[Paul Scheer]

It was a cumbersome children's toy at best.

[Matt Myra]

It was something that as a kid, as A whatever, a 13 year old, I'm certain I was like, like, ooh, I want that. But not for spying, for friendship.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I want a little buddy.

[Paul Scheer]

No reason for that. And it wasn't like, you know, like a bomb sniffing robot. Like, they also are cumbersome, but they also have like arms that come out and disconnect bombs. This seemingly had no arms. All this, it just acted like a frog.

[Scott Aukerman]

All this does is record pornography for Q.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is the little Astro Mario droid for your fuck ship.

[Matt Myra]

It's like the little droid in the Death Star. That's a black box that just rolls around. That robot whatever eight years earlier is way more interesting than this robot is in this movie.

[Paul Scheer]

Like, that's all that robot did. Seemingly, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

But it was black, so it blended in.

[Paul Scheer]

Now the scene in Paris, there all of a sudden. Oh, well, they go to the racetrack, I guess. First. I didn't even write down any notes. Oh, right.

[Matt Myra]

How could you not? Because the first hour of this movie is about race horses.

[Scott Aukerman]

Is.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, does that figure into the main plot of the movie?

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, not at all, Paul. Not at all.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I still fail to see a problem.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, this. This is where we have our. I think the closest we can get to a British off in this movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. So this is something you guys do on your podcast.

[Scott Aukerman]

On our podcast, we like to determine the scene which has the most British person in it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

In a sea of British people.

[Scott Aukerman]

So I'm gonna have to give it to McLory. I mean, not McClory. What's his name? Tibbett.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, Patrick McGee. Patrick McGee. Patrick McNee. McNee from the Avengers, you're saying no.

[Scott Aukerman]

He'S not the most British person. Who do you think is more British than him?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I somehow disagree. The French guy in the Eiffel Tower is somehow more British because the French.

[Paul Scheer]

Guy in the Eiffel Tower is such a caricature. What is he? I don't even know what he does. I don't even understand what information we're skipping over.

[Scott Aukerman]

The part where Bond presupposes he lays out the plot for you. And says, well, it could be this Zorin. And the Prime Minister of England goes, that's impossible. He's a French industrialist.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. And they've never been associated with communism, the French or anything.

[Matt Myra]

He's staunchly anti communist.

[Scott Aukerman]

He says, yes, but.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Nobody's like, it's Christopher Walken. He's definitely gonna be the bad guy who.

[Scott Aukerman]

And Em says to Bond that he has no accent. What the fuck are you talking about?

[Paul Scheer]

Well, he doesn't have a French accent.

[Matt Myra]

Well, he's supposed to be German. I thought, isn't he supposed to be German?

[Scott Aukerman]

But wouldn't he say. He's got a weird American accent, James. Figure that out.

[Matt Myra]

He's got a weird way of talking. Almost as if he's taking the punctuation. Punctuation. I'm okay. I'm okay.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, boy, you've been walking.

[Matt Myra]

You know what I'm talking about.

[Paul Scheer]

I do want to get to the French scene because obviously the most French man in the world who looks like he was drawn out of, like, the triplets of Belleville, you know, shoveling. I feel like he should have. Like, his sweat should have been escargot.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He ends every sentence with no.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then he's like, since you're paying.

[Paul Scheer]

The bill and they are meeting. They're meeting in the Eiffel Tower, in.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

A restaurant that does not exist.

[Scott Aukerman]

We need this. We need to figure out how to make this guy more French. What do we do?

[Matt Myra]

Like, the fanciest restaurant in the world in the middle of the Eiffel. Eiffel Tower. Yes.

[Scott Aukerman]

But this guy, we should get him. Have a real French stinky mustache.

[Matt Myra]

Right. Oh, and then he's killed by butterflies.

[Paul Scheer]

This.

[June Diane Raphael]

Oh, I can't wait to talk about the butterfly.

[Paul Scheer]

This sequence. June, take it away, because this is one of my favorite. Go take it away because it's my favorite sequence.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, I have so much to say about the butterflies.

[Paul Scheer]

Ooh.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

I first wanted. I. I don't know. And so this is a genuine query. Is that like a cultural or some sort. Is the butterfly dance a thing?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I can. I'm gonna answer this.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay. That woman had an act where she would do this, like, papillon. Flight of the papillon. No. And that she was somehow known for that. And, like, the way Bond movies work is the producers will just be out at weird places and go, oh, that's strange. Let's put that in the movie. Let's build our movie around.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's what's interesting about the. The butterflies aren't real.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No.

[June Diane Raphael]

So it would be interesting if her act was like, oh, she's actually summoning butterflies. Like. Like some sort of strange snake master or something. I don't know.

[Paul Scheer]

That's Sonia Roberts.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, no, no.

[Paul Scheer]

Animal.

[Matt Myra]

Wolf.

[Scott Aukerman]

Jason's right, June.

[June Diane Raphael]

I don't know. Let's inject, though. That would be sort of this weird. Like, vaudeville. Like, I'd watch that.

[Matt Myra]

Trained butterflies. I'd wager to say everyone would watch that.

[June Diane Raphael]

Fine. The way it's portrayed in this film, the butterflies are just fake butterflies that she's pretending to call in with. No. I mean, there's no dance moves.

[Scott Aukerman]

I think she does turn on a fan with her foot.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, she just whistles.

[June Diane Raphael]

The thing is, there's no act.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, there's just.

[June Diane Raphael]

Here's a bunch of butterflies floating around the audience. And she's standing up there, just opening her arms out.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's the equivalent of, like, that part of Blue Man Groovy where the toilet paper goes over the audience. You're, like, blown away, but they're just throwing shit at you.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's the whole act.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You summed up this entire movie.

[June Diane Raphael]

It was just also, I think, strange.

[Scott Aukerman]

When Mayday is trying to take the place of the other butterfly wrangler, the other butterfly wrangler is fighting it so hard. Like, no, I have to stand here. This is my butterfly. Do not fuck with this.

[Matt Myra]

So. So what we're describing is when the woman is whistling and doing her butterfly conjuring, there are people in, like, ninja.

[June Diane Raphael]

Suits of her, opening her arms.

[Matt Myra]

Yes, yeah. As if she's conducting a symphony of butterflies.

[Scott Aukerman]

And it is then someone's job to stand in the wings with a fishing pole where a date, a fake butterfly, is attached and swung past diners.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

How would you otherwise do it? You. That's how you do it. Well, June.

[Matt Myra]

June has. You would get butterflies in a caterpillar stage. You would train them so they know.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You from them early.

[Matt Myra]

You would train them. They would go into a cocoon. They would emerge glorious, already trusting you, so they do not fly away.

[June Diane Raphael]

And then you rehearse, and then you.

[Scott Aukerman]

Then the real work starts.

[Paul Scheer]

Let me just say something. Excuse me. Excuse me. Excuse me. Let me just say something about that. Those butterflies have no choice in performing that act. You know what? And that is ammo. Cruelty. And they do not belong. Soon. Are you with me on this?

[Matt Myra]

As long as the butterflies are credited correctly.

[Scott Aukerman]

You don't. You just don't want a butterfly shine on your hands, June.

[Paul Scheer]

I would think that this butterfly puppetry would appeal to you on the level of the animal cruelty, by the way, we'll get to the horse stuff.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, this woman, you can rest assured, is the Temple Grandin of butterfly puppetry. She takes the best steps to.

[Paul Scheer]

Here's my issue, also with Grace Jones and this movie. What? She is the most recognizable person in the world. She is a giant woman with a bizarre hairstyle. And you send her out to be, like, your clutch God, your undercover assassin. Yeah. There's a part where James Bond goes, like, I wanted to, like, get my eyes on her so I could, like. I wanted to identify her. Like, once you see your face, he'd be like, yeah, I could pick her out of any lineup.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

Here's what's interesting, though, about how Mayday. How she assassinates that guy.

[Scott Aukerman]

So the. She really swings that thing.

[Matt Myra]

She comes in with a fishing pole?

[Paul Scheer]

No.

[June Diane Raphael]

Does she come in with a fishing pole? But I guess my question is, why not? Already set yourself there.

[Matt Myra]

Okay.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then you have the fight with the, like, what?

[Paul Scheer]

The karate fight?

[Matt Myra]

Because what must happen is the guy has his fishing pole full of butterflies over the audience. The minute she knocks him up, all those butterflies must just fall to the ground. But yet nobody seems to notice that.

[Paul Scheer]

No. And the butterflies start going erratically around. And Noah's like, what the fuck?

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I think she's just trying to draw enough centrifugal force to lodge the hook into the guy's neck.

[Paul Scheer]

Everything about this plan is terrible.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay, can I just say one more thing about the butterfly show? The people are wrong. The people are watching it as though they're real butterflies.

[Matt Myra]

I was.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I do. Every time.

[June Diane Raphael]

People are watching the show and enjoying it.

[Matt Myra]

So do you think they think they're real butterflies?

[June Diane Raphael]

No, I don't. I'm just saying it's very confusing because the show is not a show. I mean, nothing's happening, and they're watching it with such awe and delight.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You could do a full.

[June Diane Raphael]

In butterflies.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You could do a full. How did this get made? About the butterfly show we are currently doing.

[Paul Scheer]

It's been a lot great news. We're not on the third scene yet. Of the main plot. I will.

[Matt Myra]

Of a movie that isn't seven hours long. We haven't met 11.

[Paul Scheer]

We haven't even met the villain yet.

[Scott Aukerman]

We haven't even jumped off the Eiffel Tower.

[Matt Myra]

The female lead of the movie doesn't arrive until 1 hour and 11 minutes.

[Paul Scheer]

I just want to quickly just hit two things about this butterfly thing. This is a terrible plan. If they want to kill this guy. Shoot him, stab him, by the way.

[June Diane Raphael]

Even shoot him from the same. From the same stance you're at.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Where's the butterfly dance in that? Where's the art? Where's the beauty? Where's the butterfly?

[Paul Scheer]

Dancing death. And by the way, like, the butterfly. I'm guessing, because we're not told this by anyone, you had to infer, was there poison on the hook? Yeah, because the minute it hits him, it's like he dies. Like, there's a fly in his soup.

[Scott Aukerman]

That's what he says.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

The guy dies instantly into his plate like a fucking asshole. And Bond is like, there's a fly in his soup. And then, like, takes off running after Grace Jones.

[June Diane Raphael]

And the problem is, it would seem artful if they were, like, in the wing somewhere. If the butterfly puppeteer was, like, in.

[Matt Myra]

The dark behind you also don't like how the butterfly.

[June Diane Raphael]

The fake butterflies presented the fake butterflies. The guy who's in this review of.

[Matt Myra]

The butterfly show, the guy who's in.

[June Diane Raphael]

All black, is this a critical look.

[Matt Myra]

At the butterflies, regardless of its content in the movie?

[June Diane Raphael]

He is in full.

[Matt Myra]

This reviewer found this show to be preposterous.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

By the way, you guys are missing the Kubrickian levels of interpretation that you need to bring to this movie.

[Matt Myra]

We're going to room 237. This.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, this podcast will be longer than the movie.

[Matt Myra]

I believe you're right. The butterflies are the answer, though.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

I will say that. Oh, my gosh.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The butterfly is the same color as her parachute.

[Paul Scheer]

She so her plan. But here, here's the thing. She stabs him. Her plan was always to run up to the top of the Eiffel Tower and jump off, because that's the only reason why she'd be wearing a parachute. She didn't ever think that this plan was gonna go over smoothly. She's always like, fuck, I gotta run up and do the most audacious exit of all time. Jumping off the Eiffel Tower with a parachute, where everyone go, oh, yeah, that's her. That's the murderer. That's the one.

[Scott Aukerman]

And your plan is to land in an open top speedboat with the most famous French industrialist in Paris who, like.

[Paul Scheer]

Why would you drive the fucking boat?

[Scott Aukerman]

Send your guy with the scar on his face.

[Paul Scheer]

There's so many people who could have done that.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then the fucking. And then they one up their own most French guy with the drunk taxi driver who's just sitting, drinking wine. And all he says after his car is stolen is, mika, my car.

[Paul Scheer]

The plane.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The plane.

[Paul Scheer]

The Best thing ever, I believe in any James Bond movie is what happens here, which is James Bond, while he is driving this car, it's getting cut in various cars. The top's off, the back's off. But then a car just kind of like taps it. Taps it and it splits in half like a Yogi Bear cartoon. Like, I was expecting his, like James Bond's feet to come out like flint.

[Scott Aukerman]

I can't imagine whatever car company that was, was happy with that.

[Matt Myra]

Also, that's to presume that it's a front wheel drive car because once the back is off the car, you shouldn't be able to drive that car anymore.

[Paul Scheer]

And he doesn't just drive it for a couple feet. Seems like he drives it for like another half a mile at least. And he parks it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. He literally just almost parallel parks the thing.

[Matt Myra]

Yep.

[Scott Aukerman]

Then runs onto a boat, ruins a wedding where chefs are going to murder him with a giant butcher knife.

[Paul Scheer]

And we find out that it cost 6 million francs. 6 million francs. And that is still not before main plot has introduced.

[Matt Myra]

June.

[Paul Scheer]

No.

[Matt Myra]

June, can I ask you a question?

[June Diane Raphael]

Sure.

[Matt Myra]

I feel like you're not done talking about the.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, I'm not. No, I'm not. I guess I'm trying to imagine, like I'm in this restaurant.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Pretty good.

[Matt Myra]

Put yourself there.

[June Diane Raphael]

Put yourself there. I see a woman.

[Matt Myra]

Go with it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm there too.

[June Diane Raphael]

Come on stage.

[Matt Myra]

Have you come for her or is this a surprise?

[June Diane Raphael]

You've heard about it.

[Matt Myra]

You've heard about it? Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Now what did you. June, what did you hear? Did you hear? Go see this amazing butterfly show?

[June Diane Raphael]

Honestly, I think I did. I think I heard that it was this crazy butterfly. I gotta go see it.

[Paul Scheer]

And you're. And so you're. You're under the impression you're gonna. Some live butterflies because you're a fan, like going to the Central Park Zoo or something.

[June Diane Raphael]

I assume it's gonna be something crazy with butterflies. I'm shocked to realize all the butterflies are fake. They're on fishing wire.

[Paul Scheer]

Some are, Some are.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, Paul, No.

[Paul Scheer]

The ones that come out the front look like they were coming out of like an air vent. Paul.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, it's a mix.

[June Diane Raphael]

It's. It's okay.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It is. It is.

[June Diane Raphael]

If it's a mix, you're saying that some are just being fanned up and then where do they fall.

[Paul Scheer]

Over?

[Scott Aukerman]

June? They just fall in front of the stage.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay. I guess my problem is as an audience member, I'm also. What I'm also seeing is I'm seeing a Man up there dressed in all black stage. How could I ignore him?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You're seeing him. You shouldn't be lying.

[Matt Myra]

Participate in the. In the show.

[June Diane Raphael]

I'm trying to. I'm game. I want to suspend my disbelief, but I see a man and all black.

[Matt Myra]

We're in Paris cheering the butterflies in this shirt.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay, fine.

[Matt Myra]

It makes sense.

[Scott Aukerman]

Are you. Do you ask for your money back?

[June Diane Raphael]

Here's what I expect. If the butterflies aren't going to be real. And I think this is what I've been trying to get.

[Paul Scheer]

Wait, if you are.

[June Diane Raphael]

If the butterflies are not going to be real, then I. I would expect the butterfly dance to be the thing that I'm here to see. Thank you. I expect if the butterflies are all fake. Okay, I get it. I'm not gonna watch, like a crazy trick. What I am gonna see is an art form.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. Come for the butterfly, stay for the dance. But there's no dance.

[June Diane Raphael]

There's no dance and there's no song. And that I have a problem with.

[Scott Aukerman]

So, June on Yelp. What are you giving it?

[June Diane Raphael]

Zero stars.

[Paul Scheer]

Whoa.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wow. You don't even like the food.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

I'm just looking to see.

[Scott Aukerman]

Have you found the papillon? Paul?

[Paul Scheer]

I'm looking. I have not seen much research on this butterfly lady. I mean, here's an image of it from the movie, you know, but they don't really have much information on this butterfly act. I'm sorry, guys.

[Matt Myra]

I'm sorry.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You guys are gonna have to do your own work at home later to.

[Paul Scheer]

Find out more about the butterfly act.

[Matt Myra]

I think, you know, this is one of those things. I'm not surprised to hear it was real. I feel like I'm disappointed that in that instance, there wasn't, like, a scene in a Bond film where, like, Moomin.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Shots were part of it or shields in yarn.

[Matt Myra]

It seems akin to, like, a mime act.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

This butterfly thing, you know, I think.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Just because it was foreign, that was enough for them. You know, it felt global or something.

[Scott Aukerman]

I also like how it's announced with a guitar and then there's no guitar on stage.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, that's right. Like a flamenco guitar.

[Paul Scheer]

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[June Diane Raphael]

That's why eHarmony doesn't allow members to.

[Paul Scheer]

Copy and paste for their first messages in the app. Your conversations should reflect your uniqueness. So eHarmony is building a community of people who are also putting in the effort.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's 2025.

[June Diane Raphael]

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[Paul Scheer]

Get to know each other. Get who gets you on eharmony. Sign up today. This is interesting. We're going to talk. You know, James Bond eventually meets up with the villain. Now, eventually, it's not just the butterfly.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I can.

[Paul Scheer]

This podcast might make you believe this movie takes primarily place in the third scene of the movie. It does not. Apparently it was announced that David Bowie was gonna be playing Max Zorin. And then, like, after it was announced, he turned it down because he didn't want to spend five months watching his stunt double fall off cliffs. And then the role was offered to Sting.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It was written. He said, no Sting in mind.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, really?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Offered to David Bo.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, interesting.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Then Went to Rucker Hauer.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's right. Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

And then finally Christopher walked.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But I. This plot is basically Goldfinger revisited. But the original version of the script was instead of the Silicon Valley earthquake, he was going to redirect Halley's Comet.

[Paul Scheer]

Down into Silicon Valley, which was deemed too unbelievable.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Can you believe that?

[Matt Myra]

What? That's awesome.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wow.

[Scott Aukerman]

That was.

[June Diane Raphael]

Can we just start at the horses? And can you take me through the plot?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, no, I can't.

[Paul Scheer]

The. The horses.

[Matt Myra]

I would rather if you took us through the plot.

[Paul Scheer]

So explain.

[June Diane Raphael]

I really can't.

[Paul Scheer]

You're being forced. A gun is to your head. Someone's like, I need to know.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

A sharp butterfly is to your neck.

[Paul Scheer]

I need to know right now. Just go. I need to explain. Explain the plot in a paragraph or less. So here we go. Go, go. Just. That's the evil plan. Just the evil plan.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, I know the evil plan is to blow up Silicon Valley to get a monopoly over the microchip industry.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's right.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's right.

[Matt Myra]

So the horses sounds insane, especially because of how much time it takes.

[June Diane Raphael]

By the way, what I. What I don't understand still is what the sort of global. Why all. Why there was that summit of all the leaders. I really. Oh, were they bad guys?

[Paul Scheer]

Well, industrialists.

[Matt Myra]

I think they're the people that are gonna profit from the lack of microchip competition.

[June Diane Raphael]

Why are there so many of them?

[Matt Myra]

I think. Why are there so few of them?

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay, where I get lost. Where I get lost is in the horses of it all.

[Matt Myra]

Cause a lot of this movie is about horses.

[Paul Scheer]

I'm just gonna. I'm gonna. All right, so the plot of this movie is that he wants to flood Silicon Valley to disrupt the microchip production so he could own all the microchips. I'd like to show you what Roger Ebert's problem was with this film.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, this is delightful.

[Paul Scheer]

Amazing research. Here they are amazing. She pulls all these amazing clips. Avril, Halley, she does it all. Here we go. Here we go.

[Scott Aukerman]

Good job, Avery.

[Paul Scheer]

How stupid can you get?

[Scott Aukerman]

Anyway, Walken's plan is to corner the market on computer chips by destroying all.

[Matt Myra]

Of the computer firms in California. Silicon Valley.

[Scott Aukerman]

But unfortunately, he has overlooked one basic fact. The computer manufacturers in Silicon Valley are the purchasers of computer chips which they.

[Matt Myra]

Put into their computers.

[Scott Aukerman]

They are not the manufacturers who are basically in Japan. So he isn't killing the competition. He's killing his own customers. A real bonfire. Going to never make a mistake like that.

[Paul Scheer]

Roger Ebert laying down the law.

[June Diane Raphael]

Hilarious.

[Matt Myra]

Matt Myra operated. A salute to Roger Ebert.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well done, Roger Ebert.

[Paul Scheer]

Nerdy response to why this movie doesn't work.

[Scott Aukerman]

Why I saluted him was because I was going to say that it does not. There's no. There's no manufacturing in there. You're just killing all the companies that make the shit that needs the chips.

[June Diane Raphael]

Right?

[Scott Aukerman]

So the genius, the engineered by horse steroids and his mother's stomach genius that is Max Zorin is just destroying all of the people that would be buying his bullshit.

[Matt Myra]

Do you think that he. Do you think that. That they know that? Do you think that that's just how crazy he is? That his whole plan, he doesn't even see the folly in it. It's just an exercise for him? That is true.

[Scott Aukerman]

His big thing, there's a line. I'm going to jump all the way to the almost the end of the movie just for this line. He does say to his crazy German doctor father, monocle guy, that may be.

[Paul Scheer]

The most British guy, even though from.

[Matt Myra]

Being British, crazy German does say to.

[Scott Aukerman]

Him, imagine the largest cataclysm ever to occur on the Earth. And then the other guy goes. And everyone will think it was natural. And then they're just so happy with that. Yeah, they're just so happy. They flooded a valley.

[Paul Scheer]

There's, by the way, like Halloween, Kelly's comet. Redirecting that to hit Silicon Valley makes so much more sense than what they're doing. It's like, okay, so there's horse tranquilizers that give horses super speed. We don't need to really worry about that. Then there's no.

[Matt Myra]

Here's no. We do need to worry about it. Only for about 45 minutes. Then we're gonna completely not need to race.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That is in there. Just to show that they do genetic experiments. Which somehow justifies why Max Zorin is hyper intelligent, hyper crazy.

[Matt Myra]

There's a way. There's a German doctor. So for sure there are genetic experiments.

[Paul Scheer]

But by the way, he's not like hyper intelligent.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, he knows to me he doesn't seem like, he doesn't seem smarter than literally anyone in the movie.

[Paul Scheer]

Smart people don't own blimps.

[Scott Aukerman]

Number one.

[Matt Myra]

It's a T shirt right there.

[Paul Scheer]

But yeah, he's not like, he's not super smart. He's not super strong because even when he's fighting Grace Jones, she's kicking his ass.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But it's Grace Jones.

[Scott Aukerman]

But as Q says, Grace is taking her vitamins. But let me ask, you can wrangle a horse.

[Matt Myra]

How much training has the KGB given him. Because they're like, we built you. We engineered you. We, we. And if that's the case, they've done a shit job because he's not that strong. He's not that smart.

[Scott Aukerman]

Y.

[Matt Myra]

Kind of like, he's got the kind of blondie, good looks of a really evil guy.

[Paul Scheer]

He only took the business classes at the kgb. Like, how to get a lot. How to diversify your portfolio, how to.

[Scott Aukerman]

Pilot a blimp every semester. He dropped world domination class. I don't need that. I just need to miss this stuff.

[June Diane Raphael]

Weird that. I mean, I feel like in any other movie, you'd have. You'd. As an audience member, you'd be with your two main characters as they were figuring out this evil plan. In this film, you find out about half an hour earlier what his evil plan is. And then you just watch them try.

[Scott Aukerman]

To figure it out.

[June Diane Raphael]

Try to figure it out. Which is annoying because we already know. And so it's not interesting at all. And we're smarter than them.

[Paul Scheer]

And they basically show you, like, when Christopher Walken reveals his plan, he has a big map, and everyone's looking at it. And then later on in the movie, there's a different map that they're looking at. And then that.

[Scott Aukerman]

Also, like, what I would love is a movie that follows the one guy that makes models and maps for super villains. What do you need, Fort Knox? I got it.

[Matt Myra]

I have to do a holy street board for Zorin. Meanwhile, this guy's up my ass for an iceberg thing.

[Scott Aukerman]

Now, wait a second. You want this thing to come up from a table? I can do that. It's gonna take six more weeks.

[Matt Myra]

And you want.

[Paul Scheer]

And I only really need to use it once or twice. Yeah, I'm never. I'm never gonna really talk about it.

[Matt Myra]

Green lights to symbolize oil wells and red dots to signal to symbolize fault lines. Done.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, my cousin Jimmy does the dots.

[Matt Myra]

Hey, Jimmy, how often are you gonna use this? Are you gonna have it on all the time? Are you gonna keep it closed, shut down, with a sheet seat over it, hidden in a side room that maybe they'll come across eventually, but not in, like, the big room.

[Scott Aukerman]

If you want us to build, like, a table that goes down, that's going to cost you a little bit extra. And I got to talk to my other cousin Paul. Hey, we need another table that comes up.

[Matt Myra]

Are you still working on that Death Star for that guy from outer space?

[Paul Scheer]

I only finish half of it. There's only one problem. If you get to this One hole. You can blow up the entire thing, I'm sure.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, it's fine.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, I'll.

[Scott Aukerman]

We have no more time. He's very strict.

[Paul Scheer]

By the way, they do have the big map, this big, expensive map in, like, the construction room. They've really set up for a lot of construction there.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You guys were having a good time, but I still fail to see a flaw with this movie.

[Paul Scheer]

Here's something that's interesting again, that was found out for me by Nick Nate. He is a. For an unknown reason, there are several inside jokes in the film that refer to the JFK assassination.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, this. This, I think, is some Internet guy that just made these things.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, really? Okay.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They're stretches.

[Paul Scheer]

Zorin's main strike is scheduled for the 22nd, the same day as the Kennedy assassination.

[Scott Aukerman]

Interesting.

[Paul Scheer]

Patrick McNeese character is murdered and named Sir Godfrey Tippett. A Dallas police officer, J.D. tippett, was killed the same day as JFK. And the Texan, who's named Connolly, Governor John Connolly, was also shot in the assassination. So. All right, maybe you're right. All right, so we are still barely.

[Matt Myra]

Into this movie now.

[Paul Scheer]

Grace Jones's main nemesis so far in this movie, three times has been James Bond.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yep.

[Paul Scheer]

She's like, when he shows up at her house, huh? Think I saw this guy. I don't know where it got in. Was it when I parachuted off the Eiffel Tower? Landed in that thing? We stared at each other through the mirror for a second. Yeah, the glass window.

[June Diane Raphael]

Hmm.

[Paul Scheer]

I don't know. That was only yesterday. I don't know if that's the same guy. Huh. All right, I can go back in here and do some more evil shit. Like, she does not fully recognize him.

[June Diane Raphael]

Was she also a steroid baby?

[Scott Aukerman]

No, it seems she's a steroid adult. Yeah, it seemed to me she was just getting shots on the side.

[June Diane Raphael]

Gotcha.

[Paul Scheer]

Wait, she's. Yeah, she's strong, too, because she wrangles a horse. She picks a man up over her head.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

And that's a weird show of force.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Like, just punch him. You don't have to lift someone over your head like a baby.

[Matt Myra]

That is true. That is asserting true dominance.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Then do you know who's in the background of that scene?

[Paul Scheer]

Do indeed.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Her boyfriend, Dolph Lundgren.

[Paul Scheer]

Dolph Lundgren in the boyfriend at the.

[Scott Aukerman]

Time, guy in the front row got excited.

[Paul Scheer]

There he is. Young, attractive Dolph Lundgren right there. Hell.

[Matt Myra]

All right, everybody relax. Everybody here just got wet.

[Paul Scheer]

June, I want to talk to you about the fight love scene between Christopher Walken and Grace Jones. Because as a child I was disturbed by this and as an adult, I'm disturbed by it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I was a woman.

[Paul Scheer]

What's going on? When she goes. She chomps her teeth like Iceman in Top Gun and like a wild animal and like. Is that a game that they play or does she not want to be mounted by the successful Max Zorin?

[Scott Aukerman]

Good question, Paul June.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, I think there is something going on. I can't remember if it's in this scene or an earlier scene with her. There's a moment where she gets super excited about something and she slaps herself in the face.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

Is that that scene or that's a separate.

[Paul Scheer]

That's earlier.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's earlier. Yeah. She's strange.

[Matt Myra]

Well, I mean.

[June Diane Raphael]

I mean, I don't know what's going on with.

[Matt Myra]

Is she a horse that has been.

[Paul Scheer]

Shaved down to be a human?

[Matt Myra]

Like the way they turn. The way they turn big carrots into baby carrots.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, because it would be described. It would really explain a lot. As she was the horse.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, that's the genetic testing he's now doing. He has made a horse baby a human.

[Paul Scheer]

It would explain the ornate hair. I hated him.

[Scott Aukerman]

I wanted to distance myself from this theory at first.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You know how the Giger alien, if it's in a human, it comes out more humanoid. If it's in a dog, it comes out more like a dog. She's like a Giger horse alien.

[Matt Myra]

I think this is. Guys, I'm just gonna go on a limb here and say this is erotic foreplay.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Now we're talking.

[Paul Scheer]

That's what it is.

[Matt Myra]

They are just wrestling around until they get their juices flowing. And then. Cause he's like. You remember the phone ring rings and he's like, I told you not to disturb us because they're clearly going to be like bone zoning all over the place once they get out of those geese.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah, they're just in there. They're in their larval stage right now.

[Matt Myra]

They're gonna be beautiful butterflies.

[Scott Aukerman]

Four minutes from dipping his dick and some caviar. Have sex in this movie. Right?

[Paul Scheer]

But in the next scene, in the very next scene, like James Bond's plan because he's figuring out the thing about the horses, which makes no difference in the movie. Who cares?

[Scott Aukerman]

But James Bond immediately knows exactly what the steroid is and how it's delivered just by looking at it.

[Paul Scheer]

I guess fucking makes you smart.

[Matt Myra]

There's a presumption and James Bonding. Matt's I'm gonna put this to you because you are the experts. There's a presumption in this movie, and I believe all of these movies, that an enormous part of spying is just sport fucking the enemy.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, I mean, this movie. That is the most sex he ever has. Right.

[Matt Myra]

He fucks everybody and everybody fucks him. And all of it is in service of spying.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, he does. Welcome to the real life of Cold War espionage.

[Matt Myra]

Is that it?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's how the wall came down in Berlin. It was they it down? Yeah, they it down. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

He does.

[Matt Myra]

Mr. Go this wall down.

[Scott Aukerman]

He does. He does he. Four different females. This is the most.

[Matt Myra]

This is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. The most Roger Moore had ever at.

[Scott Aukerman]

At almost the height of the AIDS crisis.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Hot tub girl, submarine girl, Roberts, Grace Jones, and that's about it. Yeah, that's four. That's a lot. A lot of ladies. Oh, wait, but.

[June Diane Raphael]

All right, so basically he's Roberts, though.

[Paul Scheer]

What? Well, they're in the shower and then they go down. They're in the shower.

[Scott Aukerman]

They're not showering together to get each other clean.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's what I thought.

[Matt Myra]

Or maybe they are.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, then. But he also is like her father. He acts like her father the entire time.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She may just be bathing him to, like, take care of him, you know?

[Scott Aukerman]

Know. He's got a bed sore.

[Paul Scheer]

She. She got in the shower to help him out of the shower.

[Matt Myra]

Shower chairs.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's what that little droid is.

[Scott Aukerman]

He's scrubbing his tail.

[June Diane Raphael]

The saddest thing. It's really a strange.

[Matt Myra]

Scrubbing his tank. Come on.

[June Diane Raphael]

Disgusting.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Disgusting be. It would need to be done.

[Scott Aukerman]

Jason.

[June Diane Raphael]

There's a really disturbing scene where I know we're. We're jumping ahead, but where Tanya Roberts is in, like, this very childlike bed. It's like the room kind of has.

[Scott Aukerman]

A small childhood bedroom.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay. Her childhood bedroom, there's a dollhouse which has been preserved. And she has had this horrible thing happen that day where there's.

[Matt Myra]

You mean a home invasion?

[Paul Scheer]

Her life, a full home invasion by the whippiest guys.

[Scott Aukerman]

One of them with the worst toupee you've ever seen in your life. Life.

[Paul Scheer]

By the way, all the guys that James Bond fights in this movie are also equally old. Yeah, like they always. There's any old guys because it's the.

[Scott Aukerman]

Stunt crew that had been working with him since he started.

[June Diane Raphael]

But immediately after these men attempt to home invade her, she decides they don't attempt.

[Scott Aukerman]

June. They invade her home.

[Matt Myra]

No, they make it upstairs and downstairs.

[June Diane Raphael]

Fine. Immediately after it happens she says she has to go feed the cat hat.

[Matt Myra]

Right.

[June Diane Raphael]

That's the first thing that's on her mind.

[Paul Scheer]

She smacked her grandfather's ashes on one of the guys heads.

[Scott Aukerman]

By the way, I hate to break it to her, that urn was empty.

[Matt Myra]

Yes, I would have loved it if there was ashes everywhere.

[June Diane Raphael]

Nothing in there. But then later on that night she, he goes to the bathroom. She falls asleep immediately.

[Matt Myra]

Wait, she first in between changes into nightwear. Super sexy nightwear.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, right.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh by the way, are we talking about is that after he makes her a full on quiche. Can't have nothing in the kitchen. Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you know about this?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you guys remember in the 80s there was this book called Real men don't eat quiche. And it was a joke, it was like a cultural joke of. And this book was a satire book about like you know, men don't bake and they don't make fine food. A man just wants a burger and stuff like this. So this was like their response that James Bond needed to answer that cultural question of does a real man eat quiche? No, he makes it himself.

[Paul Scheer]

And then he like, then he really undersells it. She's like, he's like, it's quiche. She's like what that, what's that? And he's like scrambled eggs.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Also I hate to believe that this girl who is the heiress to an oil manufacturing company does not know what a quiche is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Good point.

[Scott Aukerman]

What the is that? That it's egg pie.

[June Diane Raphael]

To feel so much sympathy for this. I mean, and maybe again I didn't understand a lot of the movie, so maybe I'm just completely off, but it seems like we're supposed to care about this very wealthy family that was digging for oil. I mean, what they, they were not philanthropists.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Right.

[June Diane Raphael]

And they were not, you know what I mean?

[Paul Scheer]

Were. Yeah, they're evil too.

[June Diane Raphael]

They're so deeply that they've lost their company.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I think the fact is that they lost it to me, Max Zorin.

[June Diane Raphael]

Fair enough. Fair enough. There's a scene later on.

[Paul Scheer]

Why is she standing on like why won't she take the $5 million which she said is six times more than it's worth. Like what's, what is she holding on to?

[Scott Aukerman]

Hang on. Her oil company is only worth $500,000.

[Matt Myra]

Hang on, she's working a day job at like City Hall.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Is that she's a, she's a vegetable oil company. It's not even close.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, it's vegetable oil that we can.

[Paul Scheer]

Support her oh, it's vegetable oil.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, I'm.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh.

[Paul Scheer]

And I agreed to it really quickly on board. Really?

[Scott Aukerman]

I was like, oh, that's very nice.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay, Canola girly.

[Matt Myra]

Just established dominance very quickly, by the.

[Paul Scheer]

Way, just in that home invasion. Those guys seem so intimidating. And then when James Bond like beats all the. Beats them all up, slowly, one guy runs away and like, hey. Because the car is speeding out, he's like, hey, wait for me.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

And here's the thing that I couldn't figure out is like, so they home invade. They come to kill her, I think. And James Bond chases them off, at which point they stay in her house for days. They sleep there. That night, the CIA guy comes and visits them.

[Paul Scheer]

I need to talk about the CIA guy. Wuhan. Okay, so James Bond meets CIA counterparts part in a fish market. He's like, do you have any soft shelled crab? And he's like, yeah, we got some out back. And they go. And all I could think of is, why is this guy undercover at a fish market? Like, he is. What, is he on another assignment or is he working in.

[Scott Aukerman]

And also the code, the code word is only. You walk up to a fish market in San Francisco and all you have to do is get this and say to him, do you have any soft shell crab? I have some in the back. There's no other thing you have to say to him. And then he whips out his CIA credential and then calls you 007.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He was doing that all morning.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. I just don't.

[Matt Myra]

I to call the main office and be like, I did it again.

[Paul Scheer]

I want.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We need to have. Have this man killed, this woman killed.

[Paul Scheer]

I want to see the other side of the scene.

[Matt Myra]

People are having a crab party. We have to have them killed.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's a popular recipe.

[Paul Scheer]

I want to see, like, they walk out back and he's like, here's my card. He's like, CIA, what is that? We just want the soft shell crab.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh. I like to imagine he has to keep killing them.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, God.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I know his fail to see a flaw. Next set.

[Paul Scheer]

But here, here's my theory on this. Like Donnie Brasco, like, Johnny Depp is undercover. They don't go, hey, by the way, Johnny Depp's character in Johnny Brasco. Donnie Brasco. Like, hey, also you might get another guy coming by. Just deal with him. Do you like, he's. Is he undercover as a fishmonger and then also doing like a side job? Like. Or is he working with Max?

[June Diane Raphael]

I think he has a lot that was his sort of his post.

[Scott Aukerman]

I think that's his cover. Yeah. Because he has just.

[Paul Scheer]

The fishmonger.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, he has the. He has his fisherman buddy.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Does a terrible Quint impression. Then it disappears.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, that's right.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then.

[Matt Myra]

Well, his. Okay. I would conjecture.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yes.

[Matt Myra]

That this guy's beat of the. For the CIA is the fish beat.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, he's like the aquaman in the CIA fish crime.

[Scott Aukerman]

You don't want people selling a sea bass like a Chilean sea bass. You can't mislabel that shit.

[Matt Myra]

What are you talking about? With the CIA. Of course we have CIA someone in the fish market.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We are the fish market.

[Scott Aukerman]

The guy that, the guy with the boat is probably who disposes of all the people who ask for soft shell crab. And he keeps calling me office. Can we get a different code thing? Because this isn't working for me.

[Matt Myra]

All of this. All of this. The CIA guy, they're in San Francisco. The plot to flood. All of it. And I don't want to send us backwards too much. Takes place after one hour plot plus spent at Christopher Walken's palatial estate where horses are being auctioned and Bond is under cover as a horse buyer named James.

[Scott Aukerman]

Smythe.

[Matt Myra]

Had closed captioning on, which is the only reason I understand it was St. John Smythe. Smythe.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Not Sinjin Smythe.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No.

[Paul Scheer]

Really?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, hold on.

[Matt Myra]

St. John it is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He writes the check with that name. But that's how you say it.

[Matt Myra]

It's how he say the name. Wait, they say the name 1000 times. Sinjin.

[Scott Aukerman]

Sm.

[Matt Myra]

And what about Mr. Sinjin Smythe?

[Scott Aukerman]

Have you checked on Mr. Sinjin Smythe?

[Matt Myra]

And I was like, what kind of. What name is this? What is this? And I turned it on. St. John Smythe. Fuck you movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wow. We've also glossed over the most important scene in this movie, nay cinema history. And that is when Roger Moore beds Grace Jones and kisses her in may what be the most uncomfortable moment I've ever experienced in my life. He does this like pursed lips. His cheeks suck in like a bellows. And it just feels like he's taking the life from her. But she's. She somehow has more to spare.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. I thought you kiss the horse like.

[Matt Myra]

It'S like a mouth eaters kiss.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But do you know, have you heard the story behind this?

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. This is amazing. Please tell it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay. Well, apparently Roger Moore and Grace Jones did not get along during this movie. Go figure. You know, two piece Jones, known for.

[Paul Scheer]

Beating up a reporter on a live like interview Show.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, Slapping him. She apparently had a big black dildo under the covers and tried to just have her way with Roger Moore as. As a joke. But he.

[Paul Scheer]

Roger Moore used to do something. Roger Moore would always, like, goose the girls that he would be bed. And they're like, you got to do something to him. So she got a big black dildo.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, what are you. What are you saying? Goose the girls? I am also confused by this.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You guys don't know that term? It's like the girls. It's spelled differently.

[Scott Aukerman]

But does he like. Or does he like, squeeze them?

[June Diane Raphael]

No idea what that part of the.

[Scott Aukerman]

What is this?

[Paul Scheer]

Pinch him.

[Scott Aukerman]

So he's just pinching?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, so he pinch the little soft shell crap.

[Matt Myra]

Hang on.

[Paul Scheer]

So no one's heard the term goose when you goose somebody?

[Scott Aukerman]

No, but like, I wonder, like, so someone says this to Grace Jones and a little pinch. And her response to this is, I will fuck him with a black dildo.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, her response is, let me go to my briefcase full of black dildos cut in, cut out foam and bring out, oh, let's say Charlie number 12 and put it under the bed. Bed.

[Scott Aukerman]

Charlie number 12 was also undercover for the CIA.

[Matt Myra]

And a terrible perfume.

[Paul Scheer]

Did you find. Well, also like Max Zorin's like, yeah, yeah, go, go. Him like, he's like, thrill with it.

[Matt Myra]

That's part of what's up. I guess everybody's just up for like, okay, him. Yeah, good.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, you have.

[June Diane Raphael]

It's interesting though, because she has an emotional connection to Zoran.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Right, Right.

[Matt Myra]

She thinks she love. He loves her.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

But wait, wait, wait.

[Paul Scheer]

They know that he's a. He's the guy who chased her down. They stared at each other. They saw each other's faces. They know he's bad. They know that he escaped through the thing. She's going to him instead of just kill him.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Also.

[Paul Scheer]

Also break his dick off.

[Scott Aukerman]

What the is Zorin doing? Not just brain punching his name into his magical license to kill computer, that.

[Paul Scheer]

Computer that he has at his desk.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, at any point, I bet he could go down to that office and punch this in.

[Paul Scheer]

Something tells me that when you're so deep undercover in MI6, there's not like a file that comes up as, like, undercover. It's usually armed. Like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But that's the problem with these movies is they have it both ways. When he wants to be secrety secret, and then most of the time it's James Bond, famous super spy in our hotel.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

What's amazing about it is that this movie gives the impression that no one in the kgb, except for the smartest guy on the planet, doesn't know who fucking James Bond is.

[Paul Scheer]

So he's the only guy multiple times to these people as different people. But even.

[Scott Aukerman]

Even the blonde girl who he beds in a hot tub knows him immediately.

[Matt Myra]

Okay, here's a question, Right.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah. Great.

[Matt Myra]

Boo Walken sends Grace Jones to kill the French detective with the Papillon.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Who is sitting at a table with James Bond.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yep.

[Matt Myra]

Grace Jones for another 90 minutes, does not recognize James Bond.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. She just saw him. They were face to face on the boat.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah. She was lining up her butterfly target right by him.

[Matt Myra]

Yes. I mean, and arguably because he was talking to Bond.

[Scott Aukerman]

Right, Right.

[Paul Scheer]

Well. Well, he was giving out information.

[Scott Aukerman]

I feel like he was just. He was just. She was just going to kill him.

[Matt Myra]

But my point being, like, he is. You're right. They always want it both ways. He is capable of being so, you know, like, he convinces Tanya Roberts he's a reporter for the. Whatever. Whatever. Yes, exactly. And it's always James Blank.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, except.

[June Diane Raphael]

Except for the times where he really.

[Matt Myra]

Remember a different first name.

[June Diane Raphael]

He really is unrecognizable when he puts on a tiny hat.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Equestrian cap.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

By the way, there's also his face and hair. Feel like something was going on in that hair. That was not.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They had to thicken it every day.

[Paul Scheer]

Really.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

They what?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They had to thicken it every day in this movie.

[Scott Aukerman]

Your body language is just, we're destroying your childhood movie.

[Matt Myra]

They had to. They had to thicken it, like, with flour.

[Paul Scheer]

But his hair is so, like, weird.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I would have less problems saying my hair was thinning. Like, it's harder for me to admit that Roger Moore's hair is thinning. You know, it's somehow breaking my heart.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's okay. Sean Connery wore to pay through all.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I know that.

[Paul Scheer]

When they break into city hall and this. Oh, I still got my car. Let's go to city hall at night. All right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you have.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you have any clips of Tanya Roberts acting?

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, yeah, 100% bring up beast.

[Scott Aukerman]

I have not seen a delivery like this, James, in my.

[Paul Scheer]

I was wondering.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, okay.

[Scott Aukerman]

This is also something I wanted to bring up. James Bond is asleep on a chair with a shotgun to protect her.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay.

[Scott Aukerman]

She leaves the room, prepares breakfast, comes back this old, does not wake up unless there's an earthquake.

[Matt Myra]

An earthquake. Which she has a apple IIC that.

[Scott Aukerman]

Is hooked up to the earthquake net.

[Matt Myra]

Yep. It's. With a push of the button, she can read the seismic reaction to that earthquake.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, this is the scene.

[Paul Scheer]

Not since January, was it? No, not January. What was her name? Christmas.

[Scott Aukerman]

Christmas Jones.

[Paul Scheer]

Christmas Jones. Wednesday. Richard played a geologist of some kind, too.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, she was a nuclear physicist. Okay.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. Here we go.

[Scott Aukerman]

Big difference. Oh, sorry. Let's protect you. Oh, you're not even. Oh, I want to say breakfast out of bed.

[Matt Myra]

What's wrong with it?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

His suit is made of skin. By the way, they're extremely sensitive to seismic activity. She's wearing the earthquake center.

[Paul Scheer]

A Will Arnett style robe from 30 Rock.

[Matt Myra]

She has a full face of makeup first thing in the morning.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She's a full body center. Snooze, oil field.

[Matt Myra]

Zorin was pumping seawater.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Look at him, though. He's amazing.

[Matt Myra]

Come on.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Is there a connection?

[Paul Scheer]

Seawater like June. Let me ask you a question. Wells are in the Hayward fault.

[Matt Myra]

Are you sure?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Checked it myself. That's incredibly dangerous. How has to stop Zorin now?

[June Diane Raphael]

You got to say that. Okay, maybe this wasn't her best scene, but I enjoyed her.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, wait.

[Paul Scheer]

What about. What about Paul?

[Scott Aukerman]

I. We probably don't have it. But the scene where they are talking. Talking to the CIA agent.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

Around the dinner table.

[Paul Scheer]

Don't have that.

[Scott Aukerman]

And she remembers I still have my security badge.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then the way she delivers summer.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So city halls open late. It's not blackout days.

[Matt Myra]

Well.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then the way she delivers the line. I have to get it upstairs. There's no reason for that. There's no reason for that. And then the CIA agent goes out.

[Matt Myra]

Are you pretty?

[Scott Aukerman]

Apparently pulls up to all of his jobs with fucking death metal playing so loud like, he drives up, there's so such loud music coming from his car.

[Matt Myra]

Can I ask a question? Why do they kill the CIA agent in his car and then drive away in his car?

[Paul Scheer]

Why not just wait?

[Matt Myra]

Why not just kill the rest of them then? Do they only come to get him?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

When are you guys gonna realize May.

[Paul Scheer]

He at the had the in on the fish market.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, these Jones, that was somebody else entirely.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You're looking for plot, continuity. These are performance art killers. And they're making a statement.

[Paul Scheer]

Grace Jones's move is love it if it was revealed. Great move, this one which is just this like, hey, just a normal car just sneaking up the old sneaker upper.

[Matt Myra]

I will say, it did get me the first time.

[June Diane Raphael]

Me too.

[Matt Myra]

First time. And she disappeared. I was like, oh, that's funny that they made her kind of magic. She kind of just magic. And then she was in the car the whole time. And I was like, oh boy, I'm dumb. I really got too stoned to watch this movie. See, I should have seen that a mile away.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's art. It's art.

[Paul Scheer]

They break into City hall and well, this sequence. I mean the fact that Zorin catches them, who gives a shit? Because. And they are in there 100%. But the thing that I'm amazed at is this next sequence where they light City hall on fire. And then all of a sudden the movie is like, well, let's see what a homeless person's perspective of this scene might be.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And they cut to a homeless fire, socially conscious.

[Paul Scheer]

And again to June's point, before, like us, the audience know the plan. So it's not really fun for us to watch them discover the plan.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, this.

[Paul Scheer]

You're watching a homeless man, like watch this rescuing of James Bond and the girl. But we're also on the inside seeing James Bond rescue the girl. There's no like James Bond, pops. Yes, Paul.

[Matt Myra]

This is the audience surrogate. But we're seeing this through his eyes because we are garbage people.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is.

[Paul Scheer]

I would love to be garbage people. But here's the thing. We see him save her and then they cut to the outside and everyone's like, oh, will he save her? And then. Yeah, we saw it already.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is the director, John Glenn, like realizing Spielberg has become hugely popular. And this is the same reason that camper shell gets the top ripped off. So you see that couple go, what? Yeah, it's all about those little Spielberg cameos. They steal everything in James Bond movies.

[Paul Scheer]

So that's a Spielberg thing I've just seen.

[Scott Aukerman]

I don't remember ET Being told through the point of views of a drunk. Except for Drew Barry.

[Paul Scheer]

More.

[Scott Aukerman]

She was drunk at the time. She's fine now.

[June Diane Raphael]

But here's the weird thing. I sort of accepted too soon. Way too soon. I sort of get it from the point of view of the naked people in the car when they.

[Matt Myra]

Cuz they're just trying to get their groove on in the back of a pickup truck.

[June Diane Raphael]

And it's surprising and different that this should happen in the middle of their.

[Paul Scheer]

Like what, the hook?

[June Diane Raphael]

Yes. But for the homeless man, it's.

[Scott Aukerman]

You always had sex with Paul lying next to him. Half covered, of course. Cause they're just next to each other.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, of course.

[June Diane Raphael]

But when. But for the homeless person's point of view, he just happens to look up and this thing is happening pretty far away from him. So to your point, it's not really that. Like that cameo where he's doing something.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm not saying it worked again.

[Paul Scheer]

I just feel like you. But the music is like triumphant. Like James Bond saved her. Like, do, do, do.

[Matt Myra]

Everyone's like watching into the fire.

[Paul Scheer]

And then we get into a 15 minute long fire truck chase.

[Matt Myra]

So this is one thing I want.

[Paul Scheer]

To talk about from a Chicago cop in San Francisco.

[Matt Myra]

This is what I want to talk about. Because there Zorn lights all of city hall on fire ablaze. And what does James Bond fucking do but steal a working fire truck and drive it away from the scene of a fire? What a piece of shit.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's so weird to see this movie because I saw it so young that I've never questioned it. It's like I never doubt that the.

[Matt Myra]

Walks are born into the fire truck. We'll get away in this.

[Paul Scheer]

Wait a second.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Challenge.

[Paul Scheer]

One more theory of this. He also hits a lever on the fire truck that shoots out water as if it's hooked up to a fire hydrant. But that's not how fire trucks work. Right? Like, fire trucks are not full of water.

[Scott Aukerman]

Some. Some are. Some tank trucks are.

[Paul Scheer]

Okay, that's not a tank truck. That's a ladder truck.

[Scott Aukerman]

Ladder truck. You're right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Some weight trucks do have water in them. Then this movie.

[Matt Myra]

Wait a second, wait a second. I do want to know, just because I feel like we are conjecturing about it. June, do you know anything about fire trucks?

[June Diane Raphael]

I know a little bit.

[Matt Myra]

You do?

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

I'd love to hear about it.

[Paul Scheer]

You lived down the block from a firehouse?

[June Diane Raphael]

I did, yeah. For a long time. I don't know. I mean, I felt like the hose situation I also had an issue with. Cause I didn't know what it was attached to. Sure, I understand what you're saying. Like, it seemed crazy that he was taking fire truck away from a fire.

[Matt Myra]

Seems irresponsible. There are still, I believe, other people in City hall.

[June Diane Raphael]

And it really did seem like that was the only fire truck on the scene.

[Matt Myra]

It was that one and the one. It was that one in the ladder truck that he climbed down the ladder of. He climbed down that.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, that's the same one.

[Matt Myra]

No, that ladder was up. And he gets on this truck. Truck and drives away. So there's two trucks. He drives away in one of them.

[Scott Aukerman]

You're also forgetting the fact that the San Francisco Police Department has already found a body, processed, and decided who killed him.

[Paul Scheer]

And this guy is 100%.

[Scott Aukerman]

While the building's on fire, he's 100%.

[Paul Scheer]

Familiar with James Bond. Like, yeah, yeah, I heard about you.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay, I get it, you guys. The minus column is almost where the plus column is for this movie.

[June Diane Raphael]

Okay, well, I have to say, too, Tanya Roberts, she seems fine when she starts. Starts her descent on that ladder and then halfway. He's carrying dead weight down that ladder. That seems.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

She'S fine. Is it. Is it. Is it that she's wearing heels and it would be hard to walk down the ladder and of course it would be hard. But she never takes off at any point to run out of the burning building. She leaves her six inch heels on.

[Paul Scheer]

You gotta look good, James.

[Matt Myra]

Oh, she.

[Paul Scheer]

She. She says, James, so many times, don't leave me, James.

[Matt Myra]

Help me so much that I was like, ooh, I wanted you to leave her.

[June Diane Raphael]

I know.

[Scott Aukerman]

She just had abandonment issues.

[Matt Myra]

I think she's very codependent. Yep, I will say that she was very codependent, Grandpa. She had a. Yeah, she had a very unnatural. Very unnatural relationship with the portrait of her grandfather.

[Paul Scheer]

I didn't like the scene where he plays peekaboo with her for like five minutes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Where did you go?

[Paul Scheer]

I'm right here.

[Scott Aukerman]

And he pulls a quarter out of his.

[Matt Myra]

She has a lack of object permanence.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

James Singin Smyth. James Stone.

[Matt Myra]

James Singin Smyth. I couldn't fucking deal with that, June.

[Paul Scheer]

How would you. How did. I mean, I will ask you this, June, like, as. As a. As a romance expert, I guess I'll ask you this. Did you find that there was like a chemistry between the two of them?

[Matt Myra]

No.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You guys are cold and dead.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, I mean, it did feel. Especially that scene where he's bedside. It felt like, oh, this is just. I felt the whole situation was very vulnerable. Like, oh, there's a little baby girl lying on a bed and there's a really old man sitting in the chair.

[Paul Scheer]

It's kind of like the beginning scene in Princess Bride.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, no. This is a May December romance. But it's December of the next year.

[Matt Myra]

It's their relationship.

[Paul Scheer]

Baby New Year and old New Year.

[Matt Myra]

Their relationship is because he really. He. He like at the drop of a hat, like, he fucking like he four women in the movie, as we said, three of whom he just like Willie, almost accidentally. Like.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah. There's not even flirting going on.

[Matt Myra]

There's nothing. But with Tanya Roberts, he does. He acts like a daddy to her. Like he's got a. He tucks her into bed. He tucks her into her childhood bed.

[June Diane Raphael]

Disturbing.

[Matt Myra]

She's wearing, like, almost nothing. And he tucks her into like a twin canopy bed with the comforter. And I Was like, this is fucking gross as shit.

[Scott Aukerman]

After he had provided a meal for her.

[Matt Myra]

Yes. And then he watches over her with her cat in his lap. There was a lot of shots of that cat. And there was a lot of shots of the KGB agent's white panties.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

Anybody else see this?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

There were like three close ups of that when they're in the hot tub of like panties. And I was like, I feel like this is just supposed to be like salacious, like guess what? She's not wearing bottoms. Because guess what, they're right there. Panties clean.

[Paul Scheer]

And you also see like James Bond.

[Matt Myra]

Period, not period panties.

[Paul Scheer]

You see, you see James Bond from knee down. And I didn't want that camera to go up. I didn't want any more.

[Scott Aukerman]

And then like it cuts outside to her boss, the head of the kgb, who for some reason is in San Francisco waiting for an agent to blow James Bond.

[Paul Scheer]

They're in a bathhouse.

[Matt Myra]

He doesn't even know the guy. She has. No, she's just there doing something else. She's just doing her own mission.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, yeah, she's unrelated, so they don't.

[Matt Myra]

Even know James Bond is there. She's like, oh my God.

[June Diane Raphael]

She's doing. When she's with the Walkman.

[Matt Myra]

With the Sony Walkman. Yeah, the very high tech device known as a Sony Walkman.

[June Diane Raphael]

But when she. Oh, she meets him under the docks.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah, yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, she's on another mission there.

[Matt Myra]

She's on her own mission.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's a similar mission.

[Scott Aukerman]

She was on a mission.

[Paul Scheer]

They're trying to take down Zorin too.

[Matt Myra]

Because they don't know each other. I mean, they don't know each other are doing this.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, they're not.

[Matt Myra]

In conjunction.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This was. This part was originally supposed to be played by Barbara Bach, who was the lead in the Spy who Loved Me. So it was supposed to be a recurring character, but she. I think my only explanation is she read the script and went, I'm not touching this movie.

[Matt Myra]

And was. Was she also. Wasn't she also married to Ringo Star?

[Scott Aukerman]

Yes, she still is.

[Matt Myra]

I am married to Ringo Starr, so I do not need to do this shit.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm doing movies like Caveman. Thank you.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, that's where they met. Yeah, they fell in love.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

And now who knows?

[Paul Scheer]

All right, so yeah, that's a mess. That whole sequence is a mess.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

But we'll agree it's just that sequence. Right. Everything else is. We're good on when she says the.

[Matt Myra]

Bubbles are tickling my. Tchaikovsky.

[Scott Aukerman]

Tchaikovsky.

[Paul Scheer]

I know that these guys have questions I want to get to their questions as well, but I want to just, before we do, just talk about the most anticlimactic end scene of any James Bond movie. Like, the villain death is so, like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I may seriously fight you on this.

[Scott Aukerman]

Really, what I do like about his death is the laugh he lets out.

[Paul Scheer]

I love that. Before he falls, he's like.

[Scott Aukerman]

I thought.

[Paul Scheer]

That was a great choice.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

But I also felt like it's two men that aren't really good fighters and who are fighting in the mental place.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

And they're like. And then one fella, you know, here's.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There's a story behind that, too. They said you can go up on the bridge as long as you don't fight. Up there, you can only struggle. That's the only way we're going to legally allow you to do it. So that's why when you see them up there, they're just kind of doing the twist.

[Matt Myra]

Wait, really?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Why? Because they were afraid people would go up there and fight? No, they were afraid that's.

[June Diane Raphael]

They were afraid someone would actually get hurt.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah, they were.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They're afraid the stuntmen themselves, if they were too physical, would, like, slip up and fall or something.

[Paul Scheer]

Because it is like, that's. I mean, I don't mind him grabbing on and falling, but it's like, oh, you want something? You want something more?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Like, even just a whole, like, grab onto James Bond's leg and James Bond's like, ugh. You know, they're all hanging off the bridge.

[Scott Aukerman]

It does. As soon as Christopher Walken falls off the bridge, it makes me realize the movie I wanted to see was the crazy German guy in an airship ship.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

An airship that has a safe with dynamite in it.

[Paul Scheer]

I would argue it's a refrigerator. I. Oh, is it refrigerator or.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I never put that together.

[Matt Myra]

Why does a blimp need a safe?

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, my God, it's a bad bomber. It's like.

[Matt Myra]

Oh, the humanity.

[Scott Aukerman]

Like, get a turn and say, let's go fishing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why does a blimp need a sailor?

[Scott Aukerman]

I love that. Hands are up.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I feel like.

[Matt Myra]

I feel like at a certain point, anybody could just be like, wait, who is at the beginning of the movie? They could have been like, somebody is a villain. Somebody's a bad guy. Something bad is happening. They might as well just be like, well, round up all the blimp owners and it's one of them, because only bad guys.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, so you mean it's either Goodyear or this Max Zorin character?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, it's Fuji Goodyear or Zorin.

[Matt Myra]

Who's who's purchased dirigibles this year.

[Paul Scheer]

As I mentioned before, there are two blimps in this movie. Two Zorin bumps, but also in at one point in the movie that are labeled Zorn and he throws a man out of one. Yeah, and would that come back to Joe?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

All you do is you go, three blimp owners and you go, which one of you some got a safe in your blimp?

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, what's funny about the guy that gets thrown out of the blimp in the first place is that all of a sudden they drop the dummy. They drop out of it. They don't even bother to make its legs not flip the completely wrong way. So you're to think that this man fell from the sky and when he hit terminal velocity, his knees broke in half.

[Paul Scheer]

June. You had a thought about that?

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, no, I'm just curious. Why blimps for Zorin?

[Scott Aukerman]

Because he's German and he's a Nazi and. And the Hindenburg.

[June Diane Raphael]

Gotcha.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I think it's more that they like. Well, we haven't done blimps and we are out of ideas.

[Paul Scheer]

Also, the blimp is the. The most shoehorned title of this movie. Cuz at the Golden Gate Bridge is like, ooh, what a view to a kill.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, no, no. It's split by Mayday.

[Matt Myra]

And so walking.

[Scott Aukerman]

Jason, you be.

[Paul Scheer]

Honor the text.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Honor the text.

[Scott Aukerman]

Jason will be mayday. Matt Gorley. I'll let you be Christmas Chris walking.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay. What a view to a kill.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, here we go.

[Matt Myra]

We got titular line of that movie.

[Paul Scheer]

We got some questions.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Comes from a poem.

[Paul Scheer]

Okay, good. Your question.

[June Diane Raphael]

I was wondering if any of you noticed that when the bomb was counting down, at the end, it was reading 19 minutes and 94 seconds. I took a picture.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, that says everything.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, wait, was it.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah, I see it.

[Scott Aukerman]

This movie's terrible. Matt Goerley.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Terribly wonderful.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, Your question simply the best. Your question. Your James Bond female name and your name.

[Scott Aukerman]

Seals. James Seals female name would be Misty Slick.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, I like that.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Messy sled.

[Paul Scheer]

What? Misty Sl. Slick.

[Scott Aukerman]

Oh, not bad. Misty Slip. Misty Slip.

[Matt Myra]

How long have you been thinking about that? That's too well thought out and gross.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, you're either like a premeditated creep or a genius.

[Matt Myra]

And.

[Scott Aukerman]

And by the way, so the slip is this thing.

[Matt Myra]

I love this slit, right?

[June Diane Raphael]

Split. He's saying slit.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Slut.

[Matt Myra]

Misty.

[Scott Aukerman]

Slut.

[Matt Myra]

Misty.

[Paul Scheer]

Spell it. S. L. I.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like, like a.

[Matt Myra]

Like a.

[Paul Scheer]

Like a oral slick.

[Scott Aukerman]

Slick. Oh, no, we like the other one.

[Paul Scheer]

Slick.

[Matt Myra]

No, Misty and slick are two of the same thing. Misty is the adjective for the slit. Is that right? Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, your question now, in the.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Movie M doesn't actually. To kill anyone.

[Paul Scheer]

Is that because the movie came out two years after the Ronald Reagan assassination attempt? What's that? But James Bond doesn't use a gun in this movie to kill anyone.

[Matt Myra]

He also. There's no Q gadgets either.

[Paul Scheer]

In this movie.

[Scott Aukerman]

There is one Q gadget. It is a Sharper Image credit card.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Which is on the level of the Batman there. Three gadgets.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He has three gadgets.

[Scott Aukerman]

It undoes a window lock.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Plus he has the polarized sunglasses and the carbon copy check thing.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, yeah. Wait, but. But you bring up a very good point, which is was the fact that he didn't use a gun because Ronald Reagan was just almost assassinated with a gun.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Not that I'm aware of.

[Scott Aukerman]

All right, yeah, he was shooting at the. But he didn't kill anybody. But then There is about 35 minutes of max Z. Soren mowing down his whole workforce.

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[Scott Aukerman]

I mean, they don't seem to worry about.

[June Diane Raphael]

They're already dying.

[Matt Myra]

There are definitely gun deaths in this movie.

[Paul Scheer]

You, June, you threatened to shut off the movie.

[June Diane Raphael]

I was actually. I was really upset by that part.

[Matt Myra]

For his lack of loyalty.

[June Diane Raphael]

These people were dying horrible deaths already. And then he gunned them.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's what I would argue.

[Scott Aukerman]

I would argue so terrible. June, at least where I. Where I fall on this is I would rather get shot to death than drowned to death. And maybe he's doing a nice thing for them.

[June Diane Raphael]

Wow.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, your name. Your James Bond girl here and your question.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

All right, my name is Cody.

[Paul Scheer]

My Bond girl is Monica. Rusty trombone, little cumbersome.

[Scott Aukerman]

It's heavily Monica.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I know. Why Monica?

[Paul Scheer]

Why?

[Scott Aukerman]

My question is, was the PG13 rating.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Invented after this movie was made?

[Scott Aukerman]

Because first of all, the PG13 rating movie was invented for Doom.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And then Temple of doom was the second 84.

[Paul Scheer]

Because there's the slaughtering scene where Max.

[Scott Aukerman]

Vorin just wantonly kills dozens of people.

[Paul Scheer]

Then there's just like a ton of nipples in the Durang.

[Scott Aukerman]

Rich nipples have been with us in the James Bond movie.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, that's the opening.

[Matt Myra]

I barely saw nipples.

[June Diane Raphael]

I didn't really see nipples.

[Matt Myra]

I. And I was looking for nips.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

If you want nipples, check out the Spy who Loved Me. And that's a Matt Gorley moment.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, here we go.

[Matt Myra]

You, sir, your name an mgm.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's the one.

[Paul Scheer]

That's the one.

[Scott Aukerman]

Name.

[Paul Scheer]

James Bond. And your question?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The more you know.

[Scott Aukerman]

My name is actually Zorin.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What?

[Scott Aukerman]

Paul. Get away from it. Him.

[Matt Myra]

Check his license.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Lost his license.

[Paul Scheer]

He's with a giant African American woman.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Lawsuit.

[Scott Aukerman]

I guess my James Bond girl name would be Carol Lingus.

[Matt Myra]

I like it.

[Scott Aukerman]

I like it.

[Matt Myra]

Best one yet.

[Scott Aukerman]

And I guess except for Misty split.

[Matt Myra]

As by the creep in the back corner.

[Scott Aukerman]

I just wanted to make sure we didn't go an episode without knowing the exact moment in the movie where Jason came. So I imagine it was. That's good. That is an excellent question. Jason, at what point in the movie did you come?

[Paul Scheer]

Great question. Jason.

[Matt Myra]

What's this?

[Paul Scheer]

Now he wants to know when in the movie did you come?

[Matt Myra]

Oh, interesting. Well, it was definitely during the horses. Ooh, it's a beautiful animal. It's a beautiful, beautiful animal.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, Your. Your name. Your James Bond girl. And your question.

[June Diane Raphael]

My name's disturbing. This is deeply upsetting. My name's Maria. The Bond girl name, I think just a good.

[Matt Myra]

I just came.

[June Diane Raphael]

I feel like vajayjay could make a.

[Paul Scheer]

Good Bond girl name.

[June Diane Raphael]

VJ and I would like to ask.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

June, our resident wig expert, what he.

[June Diane Raphael]

Thought of Christopher Walken's wiggy wiggy wig.

[Scott Aukerman]

Hang on, Hang on. Because on our. On our podcast, we are always talking, and I've always wanted to see you guys be in the same room because Matt Gorley.

[Matt Myra]

Because you thought they were the same person.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yes.

[Matt Myra]

And you realize until I see them in a room together.

[Scott Aukerman]

Matt Gorley claims to have the best wig dar in the business.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, that's interesting you asked that question because I did not think it was a wig.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's not a wig. Microphone. Cheers.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah, I didn't think it was a.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's a dye job, but it's not a wig.

[June Diane Raphael]

But it's not. I didn't see any hairlines I wasn't comfortable with.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Does this reinforce both of our wig, like.

[June Diane Raphael]

I think so.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Confidence? Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

I didn't know for sure it wasn't a wig, but I was stand.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm with you.

[June Diane Raphael]

I didn't feel it was.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Great job on wig talk.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, so with June, it's more of a feeling?

[Paul Scheer]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

No, I never do any research.

[Matt Myra]

Is always operating on intuition primarily.

[Paul Scheer]

Let me see here. I want to go. Who here has come from a far distance? Because I want to make sure. If you have a good question from far distance, where are you from? I'm from where the movie is in San Francisco. That's not that far enough. Anyone further? Anyone further with A good. Do you have a good question?

[Matt Myra]

You're. That's in the same state.

[Paul Scheer]

I'll come back to you.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Is there anybody from that weird restaurant in the. In the Eiffel Tower?

[Paul Scheer]

Actually, in the audience Tonight, we have Ms. Rose, who did the Papillon Butterfly presentation.

[Matt Myra]

That'd be amazing.

[Paul Scheer]

Yes. All right, where are. Your name. Your James Bond villain, and your question name is Scott from Chicago. The James Bond girl or villain? Girl. Girl.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We'll go doggy style.

[Scott Aukerman]

All right, you can't name a person doggy like it does. There's.

[Paul Scheer]

How about, like, Dorothy style? Dorothy style.

[Scott Aukerman]

Christmas is Christmas is okay because you can see, like, oh, we got drunk, we fucked. It was Christmas. I get it. Like, we're not gonna go like, oh, we consumed this.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Pussy Galore is just cat and dog. You can do it. What's the precedent?

[Matt Myra]

We fucked. We were listening to the Snoop Dogg record Doggy Style. So we named your doggies doggy style. Sinjun Smile.

[Paul Scheer]

What. What is your question?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

My question is, I'm not quite sure on the timeline, but did this movie actually invent snowboarding? Because if it existed before, they would.

[Paul Scheer]

Clearly know that the Beach Boys is inappropriate music.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, it's credited with popularizing it and putting it into mainstream, I think.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, wow.

[Matt Myra]

But I'm sure it existed previously.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, I'm sure it did.

[Matt Myra]

That is.

[Paul Scheer]

Somebody had to do it.

[Matt Myra]

That is clearly a snowboard that that guy is using now.

[Paul Scheer]

You would think you have a really good question. Let's see if you have it. You have. Is it good?

[Matt Myra]

I think so.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, what's your name? Your James Bond girl. And your question. Here we go.

[Matt Myra]

My name is Aaron, and I think.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You like Jugsy Malone.

[Paul Scheer]

I like it.

[Scott Aukerman]

I'm on board.

[Paul Scheer]

Phone. What's her.

[Matt Myra]

What's her cup size? Triple D. Triple D. Triple D. I.

[Paul Scheer]

Mean, it might suffocate.

[Matt Myra]

Let's go back.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Double D. Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

My question is in the. Towards the beginning of the film, when.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They'Re in, like, the boat, the sub.

[Matt Myra]

I apologize, Sub. Getting a lady on my sub.

[Paul Scheer]

He says, like, put it on autopilot, pilot. And they're clearly, like, surrounded by large icebergs.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And apparently we learned nothing from the Titanic because he's like, yeah, just put.

[Paul Scheer]

The boat on autopilot, and they're like, in the middle of a circle of large pieces of ice.

[Scott Aukerman]

Well, I think he was primarily concerned about dipping his dick in some caviar.

[Matt Myra]

And here's the thing. The sub can get around. I mean, it's. The Titanic was like 60 years previously. They've learned from that.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I don't know if you know, the.

[Matt Myra]

Autopilot pilot in the sub is able to avoid icebergs.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

A sub is powered by ink. And so they are only in better shape.

[Scott Aukerman]

James, they're running out of steam. We must.

[Paul Scheer]

All right, here we go. We're almost done with our questions. Here we go. Your name, your James Bond girl. And your question. My name is Nikki.

[June Diane Raphael]

My James Bond girl would be duet to me.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

One more time.

[Scott Aukerman]

Stand up, stand up.

[Matt Myra]

That's perfect. Stand up and take that, take that. Take a bat.

[Scott Aukerman]

She did it.

[Paul Scheer]

Here we go.

[June Diane Raphael]

And I think my question is for.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

June because we're in the same boat.

[June Diane Raphael]

Where Daniel Craig is all I know. And then this.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Were you really creeped out by the sexual thing? I mean, at one time he says.

[June Diane Raphael]

Oh dear, she has evidence.

[Scott Aukerman]

You are like a reporter, like interviewing James Bond.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I had 20, but I got off eventually.

[June Diane Raphael]

And that's because he had just slept.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

With Grace Jones, which I was really.

[June Diane Raphael]

Creeped out by the.

[Matt Myra]

Well, but he was throwing it in Zorin's face that he blasted his lady.

[June Diane Raphael]

Well, also what I didn't like is in that scene where he appeared when Zorin and Grace Jones open the door and he's lying in the bed, he presents himself as though he's a gift to the people.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And you're pointing.

[June Diane Raphael]

He's not, you know, and I'm sorry. And it's. It's fine, it's fine. The way he looks, it's just. He's not a gift when he does that.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And he opens the covers like essentially unwrapping himself and she gets in bed. They cut like 40 frames out of her getting into bed. Cuz she clearly was sharing it.

[Paul Scheer]

She had to cut all that dildo action out. All right, well, clearly we had an opinion about this movie, but there are other people who had a different opinion. It is now time for second opinions. These are five star reviews culled from Amazon. The most interesting one, before we get into them, is this guy. Go Birds 2. He reviews a View to a Kill every single year.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I can.

[Paul Scheer]

And he.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I can't believe you found my screen name.

[Paul Scheer]

And he writes the pretty much the same thing. I'm gonna just show the audience like this is pages, pages 2, 3, 4, 5, 6.

[Scott Aukerman]

The reviews get longer.

[Paul Scheer]

Seven pages of judo Kill reviews every single year. He is from New England. England and he's a top 1,000 reviewer. Okay, so go read that. There's no way I was gonna get into that. This one Is from Matt. Maybe one of you guys. Five stars. I love collecting and watching James Bond movies.

[Scott Aukerman]

So far it's us, but here's a.

[Paul Scheer]

I love collecting and watching James Bond movies during the winter when there's nothing on nor anywhere to go. Because I pilot it a fuck sub because it passes. It passes the time. That is why he likes it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Do you think that he lives in like the part of Alaska that gets is dark for nine months?

[Matt Myra]

Doubt it.

[Paul Scheer]

Patricia Applequist writes, wow, I forgot how silly we were back then. And better yet, it's a great throwback to what computers used to look like. Honestly, James Bond kisses must be fabulous because there isn't anything risque about them. Except for the neon. I don't know what that means.

[Scott Aukerman]

What?

[Paul Scheer]

Five stars. This person is reviewing this movie for five stars, saying that she likes looking at old computers and imagining sexy Roger Moore kisses.

[Matt Myra]

That's.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, so if I came across this woman and somehow in life I was like, you know, I like sometimes seeing old computers in movies.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What?

[Scott Aukerman]

The first thing she'd say is, view to a kill. There's two computers in this movie.

[Matt Myra]

Well, don't forget she also likes non sexualized kissing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

When she watches war games, she just vibrates.

[Scott Aukerman]

She functions on a high level.

[Matt Myra]

Do you want to play a game?

[Paul Scheer]

This one. This one has so many.

[Matt Myra]

You guys are gross. No, you guys are gross for laughing at that. Think about that Misty slit.

[Paul Scheer]

This. This is pretty great. I own all 21007 movies.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So now we can say this was written in like 19.

[Scott Aukerman]

This is after Casino Royale 2005.

[Paul Scheer]

Well, technically it was written November 23, 2013. I own all 21007 movies. If I didn't like them, I wouldn't have bought them.

[June Diane Raphael]

Fair enough.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, that is just sound logic.

[Paul Scheer]

I think what I like more than anything is when Bond gets in over his head, the scriptwriter always gets him out of it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Wait, so this guy appreciates movies? On only a level of. I know. Eventually the guy that was writing this is gonna figure out how to get out of it.

[Matt Myra]

Five stars for its dramatic challenges and its narrative flow.

[Paul Scheer]

And finally, this one. I'm a sucker for 80s movies and James Bond. So naturally I love this movie. Sure, Roger Moore is old and the plot is mediocre and the acting is too. But I don't care. The stunts are cool, the chicks are hot. Except for Grace Jones. She is too androgynous for any heterosexual man's taste. And it's James Bond, for God's sakes. James Bond is just the best. I don't see why so many people dislike this movie. I really don't. And am I the only one who likes this song by Duran Duran?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The number one hit of its time.

[Paul Scheer]

No one has ever mentioned it. It's definitely one of the movie's strong points. Anyway, it's a cool movie. Buy it.

[Scott Aukerman]

Cool movie. Buy it.

[Paul Scheer]

Wow, he really took off on Grace Jones there, guys. I think we did.

[Matt Myra]

I think Grace Jones in this movie, actually, I think she's very great. She's looking for a horse. I love that.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She's great.

[Matt Myra]

I love. I thought. And she sold all of the action. She did.

[June Diane Raphael]

100% for us.

[Matt Myra]

I feel like. Falls into a Brigitte Nielsen Bai Ling kind of scenario. Like a very funny, like, compelling, like, weird side.

[June Diane Raphael]

And there's something about her on screen where she's, like, a little dangerous.

[Scott Aukerman]

Yeah.

[June Diane Raphael]

She slaps herself and it's exciting.

[Matt Myra]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

I would almost.

[Matt Myra]

Her foreplay is violent.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yes.

[Paul Scheer]

Why couldn't Mayday have just been the villain?

[Matt Myra]

No, because the.

[Scott Aukerman]

No, no, we can't do that. A Paul. She owns zero blimps. True, true.

[Matt Myra]

How many blimps do you own? Oh, none. Oh, you can't be the villain then.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I have a safe. Do you have a blimp?

[June Diane Raphael]

No.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm sorry.

[Paul Scheer]

Do you guys recommend watching?

[Matt Myra]

I'm safe in your blimp. You got my blimp in your safe. Hey, wait a minute.

[Paul Scheer]

Third place. Do you guys recommend this movie? I'm standing up for a reason, but go ahead, recommend it.

[Matt Myra]

I say. No, I really. But I. You know, it's very long. You could watch some of the scenes if you wanted.

[June Diane Raphael]

Yeah, I just wouldn't watch them in any sort of an order.

[Matt Myra]

But I wouldn't watch the whole movie is what I'm saying.

[June Diane Raphael]

It's. Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Like, especially. You can fast forward anything with horses in it because it's not relevant to the rest of the movie whatsoever.

[Scott Aukerman]

You could start watching the movie and then skip the entire. Yeah, the entire horse auction is completely unnecessary.

[Matt Myra]

Yep. And it's very long.

[Paul Scheer]

I would say watch it over and over.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I recommend this movie with every drop of blood that pumps through my heart. If you have a loved one, hold them close, turn down the lights, cuddle up on your couch, or Devon, put on the movie. Preferably Blu ray. Don't stream it because the compression rates won't do it justice. Turn off your phones.

[Matt Myra]

No second screen.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No second screen.

[Scott Aukerman]

This is a one screen experience.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Unless you're gonna do like an Oculus Rift. Just virtual reality where you feel like.

[Paul Scheer]

You'Re falling off the Golden Gate Bridge.

[Matt Myra]

Which would be preferable to watching the movie. No.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Get one of those little things you put on your iPhone that projects a movie on the ceiling and just lie back in bed on a bare skin rug on the bed, just eating caviar by the handful.

[Scott Aukerman]

But you're also. In fact, hang on, you just told me to get a Blu ray of it and now you're saying project it off your phone.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, I just want you to get the Blu ray to support it financially. But don't watch that. Just project it on the ceiling. You're in a big bed, you're in a fuck ship and you just. You're going to town.

[Matt Myra]

Fuck sip.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Matt Myra]

Getting these ladies on my fuck sip.

[Paul Scheer]

All right. Well, thank you, the men of James Bonding. Very excited for our crossover episode. Very, very excited. Thank you so much for listening to our first ever crossover episode. Give it up to Matt Myra. Give it up to Matt Gourley. All those amazing guys. Just some things to plug. We have a Twitter dtgm. You can always find all the up to date info there. I also want to give a big, huge shout out to Avril Halley who pulls all of our clips. She went deep to get some great clips in this episode. Also, Nate Kiley, our researcher, although he could not best Matt and Matt, those guys knew a lot of shit. And you can follow me on Twitter, you can follow June on Twitter, follow us on Instagram as well. You can do whatever you want. And make sure you check out Frank Pierre presents the Pierre Resort and casino hotel on YouTube, my new adult swim infomercial. All right, that is all for us right now. I want to give a thanks to July Diaz who recorded the episode, Liana Waldron, who does all of our artwork. Everybody over at Earwolf, thank you so much and we'll see you next time.