Batman & Robin w/ Matt Mira & Jesse Falcon (HDTGM Matinee)

Summary

Podcast Summary: "How Did This Get Made?"

Episode Title: Batman & Robin w/ Matt Mira & Jesse Falcon (HDTGM Matinee)
Release Date: May 27, 2025

---

Introduction to the Episode

In this episode of "How Did This Get Made?", hosts Paul Scheer, June Diane Raphael, and Jason Mantzoukas dive deep into the notorious 1997 film Batman & Robin. Joined by special guests Matt Mira from Attack of the Show! and Jesse Falcon of the Nerdist Podcast, the gang dissects every facet that makes this movie a staple in the "so-bad-it's-good" category.

---

Initial Impressions and Visual Gags

The discussion kicks off with the hosts expressing their bewilderment and amusement at the film's excessive visual elements.

• Jason Mantzoukas highlights the infamous "bat nipples," stating at [03:17]:
  "Two words. Bat nipples. We saw Batman and Robin, so you know what that means."

• Matt Mira echoes the sentiment, noting the over-the-top “gearing up” montages:
  "They really took an extra couple seconds on both of those shots." [03:20]

The panel pokes fun at the neon-lit Batmobile and the absurdity of the Batcycle, emphasizing how Joel Schumacher's vision deviated from traditional Batman aesthetics.

---

Character Analysis and Performances

Delving into character portrayals, the hosts critique the casting choices and character development.

• Paul Scheer comments on Arnold Schwarzenegger's portrayal of Mr. Freeze:
  "You put neon lights on the Batmobile. Why would you cover the Batmobile with neon lights?" [04:23]

• Jesse Falcon discusses the inconsistency in character logic, particularly Mr. Freeze's motivations:
  "How did he make this hairpin turn? You know, I don't even understand." [11:26]

The panel also touches on Uma Thurman's Poison Ivy, criticizing her sudden transformation and lack of coherent character arc.

---

Plot and Storyline Flaws

A significant portion of the episode is dedicated to unraveling the convoluted and nonsensical plot points.

• Jason Mantzoukas critiques the film’s lack of a cohesive plan:
  "Mr. Freeze is just going around. There is no plan." [12:09]

• Paul Scheer and Matt Mira discuss the illogical motivations behind Mr. Freeze's actions, especially his dependency on diamonds as a power source:
  "He needs the diamonds in order to power his stuff? But that's what he needs." [12:26]

They also highlight the inconsistent portrayal of Gotham City, juxtaposing dark, gothic elements with out-of-place technological choices.

---

Humor and Puns

The hosts revel in the movie's abundance of puns, albeit lauding them as groan-worthy.

• Jason Mantzoukas showcases a compilation of Freeze-related puns:
  "Tonight's forecast. A freeze is coming. Allow me to break the ice..." [24:21]

• The panel debates the effectiveness of these puns, acknowledging their role in underlining the film's campy nature but questioning their execution.

---

Cameos and Supporting Characters

Exploring the supporting cast, the discussion shifts to the inclusion of characters like Bane and Batgirl.

• Matt Mira expresses disappointment in Bane’s portrayal:
  "Bane is the worst." [22:23]

• Jesse Falcon critiques Batgirl’s underwhelming introduction and inadequate training scenes:
  "She just wants to hang. Alright, I'll have to answer that. She just wants to hang." [30:11]

The hosts lament the lack of depth and development in these characters, emphasizing missed opportunities for richer storytelling.

---

Behind-the-Scenes Insights

The conversation ventures into hypotheticals and behind-the-scenes what-ifs that could have altered the movie's fate.

• Jason Mantzoukas muses about alternate casting for Mr. Freeze, suggesting iconic actors like Anthony Hopkins:
  "Anthony Hopkins would have been amazing." [51:19]

• The panel reflects on the film’s financial and critical reception, discussing its modest box office success juxtaposed with widespread negative reviews:
  "It paid for itself, but only just." [50:07]

---

Audience Reception and Legacy

Addressing the polarized reception, the hosts share selected Amazon five-star reviews that praise the film despite its flaws.

• Jason Mantzoukas reads a review from "Ryan," a child, highlighting the subjective nature of movie enjoyment:
  "If you like Batman movies, action movies or any kind of movie, I recommend this movie to you." [46:00]

• Matt Mira and Jesse Falcon express amusement and disbelief at the contrasting opinions, reinforcing the film's cult status.

---

Final Thoughts and Recommendations

Concluding the episode, the hosts reaffirm their stance on the film's place in cinematic history.

• Jason Mantzoukas boldly declares:
  "People say this is the worst superhero movie made of all time. And I totally agree." [50:35]

• Despite their criticisms, Matt Mira and Jesse Falcon suggest that Batman & Robin can be enjoyable in a group setting for some light-hearted fun.

---

Notable Quotes

• Jason Mantzoukas on the film's randomness:
  "It's like they went through a bunch of pop culture things like cartoons and Max Headroom and fucking old Batman shows, and they're like, just put all of it in there." [29:20]

• Paul Scheer on the movie’s transformation into a commercial:
  "This movie really wasn't so much a movie, a Batman movie as much as it was a feature length Power Rangers commercial." [06:32]

• Jesse Falcon on character development:
  "There were so many characters in this movie that it's just a mess." [48:30]

---

Conclusion

This episode of "How Did This Get Made?" offers a comprehensive and humorous examination of Batman & Robin, shedding light on its creative missteps and enduring legacy as a cult classic. Whether you're a die-hard Batman fan or a casual moviegoer, the hosts and their guests provide insightful commentary that both entertains and informs. Tune in to discover why Batman & Robin continues to captivate audiences as one of cinema's most infamous flops.

---

Listen to the full episode here.

Transcript

[Announcer]

Focus Features and Indian Paintbrush present the Phoenician Scheme. An epic comedy adventure from director Wes Anderson. Starring Benicio Del Toro, Mia Tripleton, Michael Cera, Tom Hanks, Scarlett Johansson and Jeffrey Wright. Follow Zsa Jsa Korda as he races to survive assassinations, win back his daughter and pull off the greatest scheme of his lifetime. The Phoenician scheme rated PG13 in select theaters in New York and Los Angeles. May 30. Everywhere June 6. Make Every Celebration feel uniquely you. Your dog's birthday coming up. Throw a pupperoni pizza party. Or maybe you're planning a game night. Make it a silent disco and charades night. From inspo to all the items you need, Amazon can help you create a truly custom celebration. From birthdays to holidays, Amazon offers convenient one stop shopping for for any party. Shop everything for every party on Amazon.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

ID Software presents Doom the Dark Ages.

[Announcer]

A dark fantasy sci fi shooter that delivers searing combat and explosive visuals in an epic cinematic story worthy of the Doom Slayer's legend. Now let me talk to you about this game.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I absolutely love it.

[Announcer]

You can dominate demon infested battlefields with bone crunching tools of mayhem. You can take flight atop of a fierce mecha dragon or pummel enemies in a 30 story tall Atlan mech. It is grand. It is great. Stand and fight starting May 15th on Xbox Series X&S, PlayStation 5 and PC. Available now. Rated M for mature.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Two words. Bat nipples. We saw Batman and Robin, so you know what that means.

[Jesse Falcon]

Now it's time for how did this create?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We're gonna have a good time, celebrate.

[Jesse Falcon]

Some failure, not just be a hater. Cause you know, you wonder how did this. Okay, let's wallow in the mediocrity of subpar art.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Perhaps we'll find the answer to the question how did this get made? Hello people of Earth, and welcome to how did this get Made? I am joined as always by Jason Mantzoukas.

[Announcer]

Hello, Jason.

[Paul Scheer]

How are you?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Paul. You are in New York. That is the sound quality that we are hearing. But it sounds pretty good to me. I think.

[Paul Scheer]

I think so. I think it sounds just terrific.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Unfortunately, June is not here today. Scheduling has made it impossible. But the show must go on. So we have two special guests instead of just one. Two? You know, this first guy from of course, Attack of the show and the very popular Nerdist podcast. Please welcome Matt. Myra.

[Matt Mira]

Thank you. I'm so glad to be here. I just wish I didn't have to watch that movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And then, this is a friend of the show Something we're very excited to have. He does a bunch of things at UCB Theater. And we can say that you work for Marvel, right?

[Jesse Falcon]

Absolutely.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

All right. There you go. Anyway, he works for Marvel.

[Announcer]

Please welcome Jesse Falcon.

[Jesse Falcon]

Hey, guys. Thanks for having me. Very excited.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So. All right. This movie. Holy shit. I don't even know where to begin. I think you know that you're getting into something amazing when the first shot is ass. It is like. It is. It's a gearing up shot, and it's just bat ass. Boom, right there.

[Jesse Falcon]

Not just one, two.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah, right. The Robin ass.

[Matt Mira]

They were both pretty well formed, I'm not gonna lie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, they're in very good shape. George Clooney and these guys have great asses.

[Jesse Falcon]

Well, I would dispute that, Mantzoukas, because, honestly, I went back and I watch that, you know, gearing up montage which we've seen in, you know, countless action movies and specifically superhero movies, but they really took an extra couple seconds on both of those shots.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I know people joke about this movie as being very homoerotic, but it is. I mean, there's no denying this movie is ridiculous. The Bat nipples.

[Paul Scheer]

This movie is 3/4. Yeah, yeah. This movie is 3/4 on its way to being a porn parody of a Batman movie.

[Matt Mira]

The writing would have been better for.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The poor parents want to point out that the writer of this movie is Akiva Goldsmith. This guy is insane. This guy's written so many amazing things.

[Matt Mira]

Does he have an Oscar?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm sure he has or something.

[Matt Mira]

Cinderella man, he wrote.

[Paul Scheer]

This is Schumacher all the way.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. Schumacher, I think, went nuts on this.

[Paul Scheer]

You put neon lights on the Batmobile. Why would you cover the Batmobile with neon lights?

[Matt Mira]

Oh, he put neon. And then when Robin's cycle, or whatever the fuck it's called, opens up, there are two neon Robin signs on either side just to remind you whose that is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, also, when Robin crashes through a wall, it creates a Robin, like a Batman. Oh, my God.

[Matt Mira]

That was crazy.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I mean, this movie makes the Adam West Batman look campy.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, God.

[Jesse Falcon]

Honestly. And I felt that when I was watching it because I hadn't seen this movie in a long time. I actually remember seeing it for the time we were. We were a couple buddies of mine. Our DC Buddies counterparts were like, oh, we have a screening of this thing. Come over to watch it. And we really liked the Batman series. You know, up until that point. You know, it was. You know, we accepted the fact that they were gonna, you know, kind of retcon each episode. If you Would or each. Each. Each individual film by getting a new actor. After Michael Keaton left the series, then it became Val Kilmer. It was like, oh, that's cool. Val Kilmer was awesome. It wasn't cool. And you have to remember like that even watching that movie now, it's very campy. But like, that was before they did Pet Detective two. So Jim Carrey was at the height of his, you know, comedic power and people just couldn't get enough of him. So they loved that movie. And the movie did incredibly well. It made so much money. So Joel was just like, I'm just gonna keep going in that direction and really hit the gas this time.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm hit the gas without comedians in this one. Like, that was it like he did not put any. I mean, he put Schwarzenegger, Alicia Silverstone Schwarzenegger.

[Matt Mira]

Top builder villain is top bill in a Batman movie.

[Paul Scheer]

That was shocking to me. The other thing that was shocking to me is that all of his henchmen were basically Starlight Express hockey players.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yes, I said that. The whole fight scene felt like I'm watching Batman on Ice. It was like, this is just a theme park show that was shot a little bit better.

[Jesse Falcon]

I think that was part of the pitch. When Schumacher came in, it was like somebody was like, this is gonna be just like a Batman movie, but think of it as Batman on Ice. And then you just know that, like, we have sparkles came out of the house.

[Matt Mira]

We just signed a deal with Six Flags. We. To make it work.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, absolutely. And to that point, this is the other thing that I really noticed about watching this film is that, you know, I'm very conscious of product placement. And I don't mean like, you know, the coke can and Ghostbusters. When she opens up the fridge. I'm talking about stuff that toy companies specifically asked to be in. Like, to be in the film. This film really wasn't so much a movie, a Batman movie as much as it was a feature length Power Rangers commercial.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, it was commercial. It was absolutely.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

There's so many. I mean, there's literally a line. I believe I have this. Can I play the Poison Ivy one? Yeah, I have that. Like, listen to this.

[Jesse Falcon]

No, no. First you're going to tell me where Freeze is and then you're going to jail. I'm a lover, not a fighter. That's why every Poison Ivy action figure.

[Matt Mira]

Comes complete with him, which is a bold faced lie.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Poison Ivy action figure. By the way, we're getting a little taste of Uma Thurman who plays Poison Ivy. Her subtlety in this movie is on par.

[Matt Mira]

There was obviously a Greta Garbo plant that bit her at some point.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, that was funny because she was like a mousy little girl at the beginning. And then playing it fine, somebody pours a mixture of chemicals on her and she completely becomes a different character.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. Hey, fellas, you wanna come up and see me sometime? She does have, like, a crazy line where she's like, my blood is aloe and my lips are like.

[Matt Mira]

Whenever Kate Mulgrew got trapped in the holodeck as her deliverance.

[Jesse Falcon]

Oh, my God.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Movie as a staple right away of a bad movie, which is. There is a surfing scene right at the top. Like, they're in, like, a little.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, no. I was watching it just this morning, as a matter of fact. And when Mr. Freeze's car starts tilting up, I'm like, that's not a rocket ship. Right?

[Paul Scheer]

That's what I said.

[Matt Mira]

They're not gonna take a rocket. He's not taking a rocket. And then a fucking jet fires. And they're in a rocket. Also, Schwarzenegger's in a museum.

[Paul Scheer]

Rocket is in a museum, right?

[Matt Mira]

Well, he drove it in there. He was ready. But if you do. If you ever happen to see this again on television, just pay attention to Schwarzenegger's terrible space work with joysticks doing nothing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

By the way, I want to talk about Schwarzenegger's car.

[Announcer]

He is Mr.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Freeze in the movie, which means he says a lot of Freeze puns. We'll get to that probably a little bit later. But his car looks like. I don't watch Doctor who, but what are those robots in Doctor?

[Matt Mira]

Cybermen.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They look like. It has all the things. Yeah, it looks like that.

[Matt Mira]

Or a Dalek. Yeah, a Dalek.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

A Dalek, Yeah. And it looks like. So it doesn't even look like a car. I don't know why it has all these bullet things out of it. It's ridiculous. And Gotham City in this movie, like, Tim Burton made a cool, dark Gotham. It looked a little bit interesting. This one. They have statues that are hundreds of years.

[Matt Mira]

I'm gonna fight you on this. I do like the super gothic Gotham City. Like, I like the giant statue. I don't. What I don't care for is that gangs love black light.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, yeah. And both movies. Both Schumacher movies in the last one.

[Paul Scheer]

So much of this stuff has, like, elements to it that seem to me like Andrew Lloyd Webber musicals. Whether it's like the Starlight Express kind of like running around guys on roller skates or ice skates, I guess is what it is. Or like that crazy.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Black light neon makeup that people are wearing. It's crazy.

[Matt Mira]

I just want to be at the meeting where Freeze decides this is what you guys are gonna wear. You're gonna help me out.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, dude. Honestly, like, if you watch. Really? Gooning for Mr. Freeze is one of the shittiest jobs you can possibly have because it's like, you know, they all have to. They all have to sing the Freeze monster song. Yes, Freeze, my son. And then what are they eating? Tongues are all stuck to frozen dinners.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is solid ice. The best shot in the movie starts off on two. Like, was it like a polar bear Feet, like slippers, and they're tapp. And they're watching.

[Matt Mira]

And you pull up on his polar bear robe.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Polar bear robe. Cause he so dumb. It's so dumb. And he's leading a sing along to, like, that Raskin bask heat Miser song. And he's like, sing, sing. Like, yelling at them to sing along with the Mr. Freeze from that. It makes no sense.

[Jesse Falcon]

Well, to even add insult to injury here is like, he has to wear that mechanical suit to keep himself alive. And when he takes it off, he wears clothes that will make him warmer. Yeah. Which is like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

Was it Vivica A. Fox?

[Matt Mira]

Vivica Fox is the, like, his lady. Yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

Hench lady.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Which.

[Jesse Falcon]

The whole logic of Freeze in this movie is so fucked up because, you know, at times he's like, I'll kill you. I'll rip your bones out. And then. And then at the end of the movie, Batman is like, hey, listen, man, I know you just really saved your wife. He's like, really? And then he's like, oh, I'm a good guy now. Like. Like, how did he makes this hairpin turn?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You know, I don't even understand. Understand that Mr. Freeze in this movie has no plan. Really. Like, he's just. He gets cut into the plan.

[Matt Mira]

I think the most compelling villain in this movie is Poison Ivy's boss that wants to sell off the Bane super soldiers.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, which is that great guy from Smallville. Yeah, Don Glover. He is appealing to the unknighted nations.

[Jesse Falcon]

I loved those five character actors they had standing in the balcony. Like, one black guy, one Chinese guy.

[Matt Mira]

You know that they are all dressed like that in their head.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Sh. They're the most racist view of the world. Yeah. But there is no plan. Just to point out. There is no plan. Mr. Freeze is just going around.

[Matt Mira]

No, no, no. His Plan which cracked me up is to get money for research. Oh, that's his plan. He doesn't want to. He holds them ransom. Instead of selling the billions of dollars worth of diamonds he's stolen, he decides to freeze Gotham City. Ransom.

[Paul Scheer]

Doesn't he need the diamonds in order to power his stuff?

[Matt Mira]

Right, but that's what he needs. He needs it to power that. Now I'm talking about the plot of Batman. And please, please get into it. He needs it to power his freezing engine which will freeze Gotham City, which we will then hold ransom so he can get billions of dollars for research.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Thank you for clarifying that. Cause I did not get that. And I am happy to now know that. That I really feel this.

[Paul Scheer]

I fully missed that.

[Matt Mira]

But he could just cut out the middleman and sell diamonds.

[Paul Scheer]

I get the frozen wife part. I get the part where he needs to make his wife better.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

But I could not understand what the fuck was going on because I was so confused by the idea that the most powerful fuel source in Gotham is diamonds. I was like, I don't know. Everybody seems to want diamonds to fuel something.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah. What?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, I mean, look, when you have. When the number one reporter in Gotham is a gossip.

[Matt Mira]

Gossip reporter.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, gossip. Comment. I'm here with Mr. Bruce Wayne.

[Matt Mira]

My personal friend, Mr. Bruce Wayne says.

[Jesse Falcon]

He was way overused in this movie. Like why were there two scenes that.

[Matt Mira]

They needed that, you know, that woman. That woman exists in reality. That actress is that woman. And she is best friends with Joel Schumacher.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, I'm sure.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, Joel, baby, put me in the movie.

[Jesse Falcon]

And her sister, Cindy Adams.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Gossip. Gertie is her name, played by the lovely Elizabeth Sanders, who has only been in. Who's only been in the two Joel Schumann movies.

[Matt Mira]

What did I just tell you?

[Jesse Falcon]

She plays the same character in both movies.

[Matt Mira]

Gossip Gertie, it has to be right.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She also was in Batman returns as Gothamite 4. But I imagine that has no lines there. So I think that she could be a friend of Joel Schumacher. She has to be.

[Jesse Falcon]

I want to get back to something for a second just because this is a fun little tidbit of information. The scene at the top of the movie where they're fighting in the museum and then they blast off into low orbit and then use the escape hatches.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And surfboards when Robin gets to say just the doors.

[Jesse Falcon]

Just the doors. Just the doors.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Robin goes, cowabunga.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yes, he said that. Yes, he did say that. So he co opted a Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtle line there. But that that scene was described to Me in a very early days before the X Men movie ever got made. And the executive producer of the film had this idea that at the end of the X Men movie, you were gonna see something like you had never seen before. I have to say it in his kind of accent because this guy was an amazing salesman. He's like one of the greatest salesmen in the world. And he was like, at the end of the movie, you're gonna see something like you've never seen before. It's gonna be Wolverine and Sabertooth up on the top of the mountain and the snowboarding down and the claw fighting all the way down to the bottom of the mountain. Almost happened. Their claw fighter claw fight almost happened. In X Men, I will say that it is.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We always are looking for signs of a bad movie. And surfboarding, surfing is always a clear sign.

[Matt Mira]

Like co opting that it was bad before that. Because immediately when they're in the Batmobile, when Batman now is in the one seater Batmobile, the 27 foot long Batmobile.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That looks really like a. I mean, it really does look like an ambiguous gay duo.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, it does totally.

[Matt Mira]

Commissioner Gordon comes on and goes, there's a new villain.

[Jesse Falcon]

I wrote that down.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

A new villain.

[Matt Mira]

A new villain.

[Jesse Falcon]

To trump that. To trump that. When Batman meets him, he's like, hi, Freeze, I'm Batman. Like, what fucking superhero? What Dark Knight goes, hi, I'm Batman.

[Matt Mira]

He calls himself Mr. Freeze. And we completely skipped the fact that they look at each other, click their boots and ice skates.

[Jesse Falcon]

Ew.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Because you never know when you need to ice skate fight.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah. Mind you, they just leave the. They just see the bat signal. So they're leaving on an ordinary crime fighting thing. They don't know that they're doing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Bring the bat boots with the, with the. Make sure it has ice skates inside.

[Jesse Falcon]

And this is a dig at Warner Brothers a little bit. That movie was made in what, 1997?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. Yes.

[Jesse Falcon]

So that was the closest we've come so far in film to seeing world's finest. And there's one line where he says, now I know why Superman works alone. And I'm like, that's the fucking closest we've come to see Superman and Batman on screen together. That's an atrocity.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Can we talk a little bit about. I feel like the whole movie is like they left the camera rolling or they didn't make the cut as quick as they needed to. There's always an awkward beat after the final line is said. There's one scene in particular where Alicia Silverstone shows up as Barbara. Barbara the Dot.

[Matt Mira]

And then Alfred's niece.

[Paul Scheer]

She's British.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Her parents are British. She's Alfred's niece. But she.

[Paul Scheer]

She came from school in England.

[Matt Mira]

Mind you, Alfred's sister's gotta be as old as Alfred.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yes. Yeah. And Alicia's old. Like 18.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

She comes in and they're like, can she stay? Basically, like, can we keep her? Can we keep this girl? And they're like, okay. And then they just like, cut on one person's face. Cut another person's face, another person's face. No dialogue is like shaking their head and just smiling like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But there's nothing. It's like. It just seems like. I almost felt like, should I leave the room? This is over, right?

[Matt Mira]

This is the movie where we figured out that Alfred must cut both their hair. Like Robin and Clooney. They have the same fucking haircut.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It makes sense. He takes care of them, gets their bullet wounds. I also like that that the Bat computer in this movie is just a Mac.

[Matt Mira]

It's a Mac.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's just a Mac. It's not even a fancy one. It's just a regular Mac.

[Matt Mira]

No, but the hard drive icon's the Bat logo.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

It's weird that they make moves like that. Like all the other computers in the fucking Batcave. Or Bat. Like, they have bat iconography all over him, but they have a Mac. But when they start bidding, fucking Batman pulls out a credit card. Oh, God, that's Batman Returns. It actually said Batman Return.

[Matt Mira]

It's Batman Good. Three forever. No expiration dates. It was good through forever.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The Batman credit card never leaves the cave without it. And I know that. And you can make the argument. You can definitely make the argument like, oh, no. They're trying to be campy, but they aren't. They do some things that are super campy and then some things that are super serious. Like Alfred's dying in this movie. And that's dealt with. Like, Alfred's dying. And we have. This is a big deal. But then there's back credit cards, too. So it's like. It makes no fucking sense.

[Jesse Falcon]

There's even another level to it. And I'm glad we got onto the illegal Silverstone introduction, because there was something that was so disturbing to me about Robin wanting to, like, seemingly her. That just seemed like a brother wanting to a sister. And it's just like, hey, man. Like, just leave that alone. He's like, I can't, man. I just gotta. I gotta taste that.

[Matt Mira]

Have you seen my COD piece lately? It's much bigger.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The COD Piece.

[Announcer]

Today's podcast is brought to you by Squarespace. Hell, I might even be brought to you by Squarespace. I got so many websites up there. Squarespace gives you everything you need to offer services and get paid all in one place. Truly, I have been loving my Squarespace experience. I have broadened out. I have my website. How did this get made website, Unspooled's website, Dark Web's website, all there and they each work completely differently. And what I love about Squarespace is from consultations to events to experiences, you can show off your offerings with a customizable website designed to attract clients and grow your business. Plus, with Blueprint AI, they have this AI enhanced website builder. You can quickly create personalized sites that align with your brand and goals. You can streamline your workflow with built in tools for appointment scheduling, email marketing invoices and seamless online payments. To keep your business running smooth, head to squarespace.combonkers for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use the Code bonkers to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. That's right, squarespace.com bonkers using the offer Code Bonkers Focus Features in Indian Paintbrush present the Phoenician Scheme an epic comedy adventure from director Wes Anderson. Starring Benicio Del Toro, Mia Tripleton, Michael Cera, Tom Hanks, Scarlett Johansson and Jeffrey Wright. Follow Zsa Jsa Korda as he races to survive assassinations, win back his daughter and pull off the greatest scheme of his lifetime. The Phoenician scheme rated PG13 in select theaters in New York and Los Angeles May 30th everywhere June 6th. You know, when you own a small business, the workday doesn't end at five. No, your business is always on your brain, even on the days off. So when it's time to hire, you want to find somebody who puts in that same hustle. That person who is going to step to the plate. Yeah, I use sports metaphors just like you and your hiring partners that you need to use to find that Perfect partner is LinkedIn jobs. When you clock out, LinkedIn clocks in. They make it easy to post your job for free, share it with your network and get qualified candidates that you can manage all in one place. And LinkedIn's new feature can help you write job descriptions and then quickly get your job in front of the right people with deep candidate insights. At the end of the day, the most important thing to your small business is the quality of candidates. And with LinkedIn, you can feel confident that you're getting the best. Find out why more than 2.5 million small businesses use LinkedIn for hiring today. Post your job for free at LinkedIn.com valuable that's LinkedIn.com valuable to post your job for free. Terms and conditions apply.

[Paul Scheer]

We haven't even talked about the fact that Bane is in this movie.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, yeah, yeah, Huge.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Forgot all about Bane.

[Paul Scheer]

Like. Like, the reality is, like the main villain of the current super Batman movie is this crazy, weird cartoon character in this movie.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, I mean, beyond car. Like, he look. He looks like a toy. I've never seen a character look more like a toy. And he has the best lines.

[Matt Mira]

By that time, the Nightfall series had already come out. Right. Bane had killed Batman, essentially broken his back in the comics. So you're in for this. Like, oh, Bane's in this movie. He's gonna do something awesome.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And Bane is just a guy who goes, like, how about that?

[Matt Mira]

How about that fucking photograph of them coming off the plane, Casablanca style?

[Jesse Falcon]

Oh, my God. Oh, my God.

[Matt Mira]

And it's just like, it looks like.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

His face is photoshopped. I mean, it's basically. They took like, the bad disguises of, like, the Thing from Fantastic Four, or.

[Matt Mira]

If you opened it up, it would be the Little Rascals on each other's shoulders.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, yeah, exactly.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Bane is the worst.

[Paul Scheer]

I forget when Bane fought the Glow.

[Jesse Falcon]

In the Dark gang.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, he just. Essentially, it's a two move. It's a two move fight where they whip him with chains and he throws them all and they run. Yeah, yeah, they just run out of their home.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And Bane basically, like, he gets, you know, the Venom shot into him and that makes him Bane. And he goes from like a little wimpy guy, he basically just blows up on steroids within a second. I'm not. I don't know all about Bane's backstory, but is that how it happens in the comic book?

[Matt Mira]

It's not far off.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, he does. He uses the one thing. When he hit the chest and he got more juice, he'd become more powerful. But, like, the thing is, they've been working on that guy for years to get him to that size. But.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He didn't just. He didn't just basically drink some potion and turn it to.

[Jesse Falcon]

He's the second or the first character in the movie that you see because you see all three. The origins, you see his origin, you see the. The making of Poison Ivy, poison Ivy and Mr. Freeze. Each one of them is, doused in chemicals and then becomes this super villain. I just like, it's like the easiest fucking out, you know, it's like it's.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The Joker thing over and you fall into that and you become like, hey, you fall into plants, you become that. Ah, yeah, you fall into the. Yeah. And Schwarzenegger falling into his vat of ice. I don't know what the value no.

[Matt Mira]

One knows about, but I really enjoyed his small performance as Victor. I thought was like yeah, I believe that Nobel prize winner.

[Jesse Falcon]

I don't know what he was a doctorate of. I think it was icy. Puns, right?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Speaking of puns, I do want to play. I know that you probably have seen this clip online, but it's worth just listening to for a second. It's a combination or a compilation of every freeze pun. Yeah, super cut, super cut. Take a look. Tonight's forecast. A freeze is coming. Allow me to break the ice. Okay, you're not sending me cooler Freeze. Well, what killed the dinosaurs? D aid.

[Matt Mira]

There's like no follow up for that either.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Jesse. Cool bird boy.

[Announcer]

Let's take some ice.

[Jesse Falcon]

Show some mercy.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I'm afraid that my condition has left me cold to your pleas of mercy. All right everyone chill. It's a cold. All right. We. You get the idea. What I do like listening to those is that he goes really the extra mile. And some like what killed the dinosaurs? Like well, all right.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, I guess I see Warming meteor, some of evolution.

[Matt Mira]

Oh my God, it's so bad. It is so just the thought that Schwarzenegger must have gotten $20 million.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

$25 million. And he's only on screen for 25 minutes. A million dollars a minute. And when he is regular Victor Freeze, he's watching a video of himself giving his wife a necklace. Well, where was that video camera? This is like a personal moment.

[Matt Mira]

It's just like Bruce who remembers everything third person. Oh, Alfred when I fell.

[Paul Scheer]

All of his like weird shadow memories of Alfred tucking him in and stuff.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And by the way, Coolio alert. That's right, Coolio shows up for a motorcycle race. Cause oh yeah, Alicia Silverstone got kicked out of her boarding school for racing motorcycles.

[Matt Mira]

Of course, that's definitely against the rules of that school.

[Jesse Falcon]

She was there to study computers.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, she's really good at computers. Cuz when she's guessing Alfred's password, she's the worst ever at guessing a password types in England. England is one of the password.

[Matt Mira]

England, Wayne.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, the other thing too is like she gets. This is the other thing. Like fucking Batman's supposed to Be the greatest detective on the planet. She shows up, he's like, who the fuck is that? Like, you don't know all of Alfred's extended family? Oh, yeah.

[Matt Mira]

And then.

[Jesse Falcon]

Oh, yeah. Wait, you're at what school? Oh, yeah. Because I read it on your. Like, he should know everything about her, by the way.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. There's only one person, arguably, in Bruce Wayne's life that he cares about would be Alfred.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So you figured he would do a little bit of due diligence and be like, oh, so you have someone you're connected to in your life.

[Jesse Falcon]

He would know that Alfred's brother is the Alfred Maharajah. It's like a family of butlers, you know, it's just like Manservants Incorporated.

[Paul Scheer]

Hey, guys, about three quarters of the way through this movie, the fight sequence start having cartoon sound effects, right?

[Jesse Falcon]

Oh, my God. Yes.

[Matt Mira]

Yes.

[Paul Scheer]

Out of nowhere.

[Matt Mira]

No, that starts early because the dinosaur. When the statue of the dinosaur crumbles, it roars. Oh, I don't know if anybody caught that sound.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, you know what? I totally forgot about the fucking Fred Flintstone entrance of Batman.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He slides down the back of a dinosaur, pops off his tail just like the opening of the fucking Flintstones. And it's like, whooshing.

[Matt Mira]

Well, it was 5 o' clock.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It was weird that he did punch his time card into the dinosaur's mouth. Yeah. I mean, Joel Schumacher. Oh, man. The. Oh, what was it? They were those DayGlo skeletons. When they did have that fight, did I see this? They were hanging out in the Turkish baths.

[Matt Mira]

Yes, the Turkish bath.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

Closed Turkish baths in the bath house.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They made totally normal.

[Jesse Falcon]

Totally normal.

[Paul Scheer]

Bad guys hang out with closed Turkish abs. Not a gay thing at all.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Not gay at all.

[Matt Mira]

I love that. In this reality of Gotham City, the police cars have not been updated since 1933.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, that's another thing. It's like they. I feel like they're like, oh, we like this Tim Burton thing. It should be weird, but no one had an idea of why it was good when Tim Burton did it. It was like, yeah. Be like, old car, super new computer. You have high tops, you wear old ties. It's like it makes Alpha.

[Jesse Falcon]

Max Headroom.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. This is my favorite scene of the entire movie.

[Matt Mira]

Did you pull a clip of this?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I did. I actually did.

[Jesse Falcon]

It's just so fucked up that it's like. It's like they went through a bunch of pop culture things like cartoons and Max Headroom and fucking old Batman shows, and they're like, just put all of it in there.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Just shove it in. It just feels like someone just shoved everything into a bag, like. Yeah, just sit on it. Cram.

[Jesse Falcon]

It doesn't fit. It doesn't fit.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I don't care. I don't care.

[Jesse Falcon]

It kind of hurts.

[Matt Mira]

The nipples.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Bat nipples. Oh, man.

[Matt Mira]

No, wait. Play the clip of the computer.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is Alicia Silverstone is kind of bored. One night she finds the Batcave, and this is what happens. One of the most preposterous things of.

[Matt Mira]

All time after she breaks into her dying uncle's secret to his brother.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yes, here it is. Intruder alert. Intruder alert. Intruder alert. Intruder alert. Identify. Identify.

[Jesse Falcon]

Alfred, it's me, Barbara.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I expected you might find your way down here, child. As such, I programmed my brain algorithms into the Bat computer and created a virtual simul simulation.

[Jesse Falcon]

I'd like to help Batman and Robin.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I anticipated you would and took the liberty to create something in your size. And that's how she becomes Batgirl. He programmed a thing. He's like, imagine recording that day, like, all right, well, if she comes down here and she wants to know. I'll have to answer that. She just wants to hang. Alright, I'll have to answer that. Oh, she needs a costume. That's how she becomes Batgirl. Just like, oh, yeah. I thought that this might happen. And also, I love the fact that Barbara reacts to Alfred as if he's a person. Not.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah, no, no, no, it's me, Barbara. Why can't you see me with your eyeballs that are clearly in front of me?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Why are you being so mean?

[Matt Mira]

Why is your voice skipping?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I did not remember how, like, unappealed, like, I don't know. There's so much. There's so, like. Like you said, it's like falling in a vat. It's like, oh. Oh, yeah, yeah, you got a costume. And she not only. There's no training, she's shown no skill besides motorcycle racing.

[Matt Mira]

Well, she flips Robin over in the.

[Jesse Falcon]

Garage and if I may, in the previous film, okay, Batman Forever, the only training. By the way, the only surviving two members of this fucking cast are Robin and Alf. Alfred's the only Alfred all the way through all four of these things. In the previous film, when Robin's family is killed and Bruce Wayne takes him in. Alfred sees him cleaning his clothes in the room where they've got the washing machine. And he says, oh, do you want to use the dryer? And he's like, no, dude, man, I've got my own way of drying clothes. And then they cut to this fucking Insane montage of him, like, using his wet clothes as, like, nunchucks and, like, draining the water out. And, like, that was the extent of his bat training, like, drying his clothes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

He did Karate Kid of drying.

[Matt Mira]

He dried them really well. Saved a lot of energy.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It makes you realize, like. And then he said, like, batman Forever. People are like, that is a good movie. I like that one so much that they gave them $125 million to make this movie. That's how much it is.

[Matt Mira]

I was reading about the movie, and the dailies were coming back to Warner Brothers, and they were so happy with them, they signed Joel Schumacher for another movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, it was gonna be a scarecrow movie.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yes, that's right. With Jeff Goldstein. Excuse me.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So my question is, Warner Brothers must have just like. I mean, the dailies couldn't have been better than this movie.

[Matt Mira]

I just think maybe the dailies didn't have sound.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Looks cool. Looks good.

[Matt Mira]

It looks really cool.

[Jesse Falcon]

You know what I think when you see the dailies compared to the last film, it really doesn't. If you take the individual segments, they don't look that different. You know, the thing that really makes the previous film watchable is Jim Cage.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

You know, Jim Carrey's kind of funny in the movie. You know, it's like, he does the best with that material that anybody could possibly do and kind of makes it enjoyable. And there's still lines that I crack up at. But. But they're. But this. There's not. There's none of that element holding it together. And if you're gonna be that campy, you need to be funny. And they. They weren't. But they. You know, they had all those elements. It's like that.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

They had no. I mean, they had nobody being. I mean. I mean, I guess Mr.

[Matt Mira]

Freeze, but there's little to no logic in this movie either.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, I mean, even. Like we were saying before, even the puns don't even make sense at a certain point. It's like, there was one pun.

[Paul Scheer]

Was like, some of them aren't even puns.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Paul Scheer]

Some of them are just riddles or statements.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

If revenge is a dish best served cold, then put on your Sunday's finest. Like, what.

[Matt Mira]

What are you talking about? Hang on, Freeze. I don't follow you. What am I doing?

[Paul Scheer]

Iceman Cometh. And I was like, is this, like, a Eugene o' Neill reference? Like, like, the play?

[Matt Mira]

The funniest line to me in this entire film is right after Batgirl appears to Batman and Robin, she says, bruce, it's Barbara, I found the Batcave.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like, so dumb. So dumb.

[Announcer]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Cause he goes, who are you? She's like, batgirl. He goes, isn't that a little unpc.

[Matt Mira]

Bat person or Batwoman?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. And then she gets like a friend.

[Jesse Falcon]

No, Bruce.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

No, no, no. It's me, Barbara. Barbara's only.

[Matt Mira]

Obviously you don't know that it's me. I mean, I'm covering a square inch of my face. You couldn't possibly be.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

My hair is out full. Oh, man.

[Jesse Falcon]

Which is another fucking crazy move because. All right, Alfred designs a suit for her. She goes out, she helps those guys, they get their ass kicked. But then Alfred's computer brain had also designed another suit for her to wear.

[Matt Mira]

To hold up against the cold.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, these other guys, you know, I mean, again, that's another, like, fourth, you know, third act action figure move where it's like, we're gonna need to sell some different toys at the end of the movie.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We need another. Another costume for Barbara. Oh, good old Barbara. Barbara also does. I mean. Cause she is so, like, naive. Like, it's me, it's Barbara. Like, you wouldn't think of her as kicking anyone's ass. I feel like.

[Matt Mira]

Not even a little bit. Not even a little bit.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Did she take care? I guess the only reason why they really need her is. Cause she needed to take care of fighting Poison Ivy, right?

[Matt Mira]

Cause I think she had to fight Poison Ivy just so a dude wasn't beating up a lady. Yes, exactly. By when Poison Ivy is finally defeated, the line curses is uttered by Uma Thurman. That's the line she says. She says curses.

[Jesse Falcon]

Because this is PG 13, guys. You can't say fuck in these movies.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I also love.

[Paul Scheer]

Would it be amazing if they just in one line were like, fuck?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

It's PG13. We get one. We get one and they really give it fu. It's fucking cold.

[Matt Mira]

Jeff Ventura's cameo was great too.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

The other guy who he's a guard with is the other dude who ended up playing Conan on the TV show.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, really?

[Jesse Falcon]

His name is like Rolf. Crazy long last German name.

[Matt Mira]

Oh, wow.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I was gonna say one of my favorite again, Mr. Freeze Lines. It's another kind of pun, but not really. Is don't forget to winterize your pipes. That's like his.

[Matt Mira]

Also, I enjoy the idea that Bane can't possibly get through reinforced steel after everything we've seen him do. Oh, reinforced steel.

[Jesse Falcon]

You know what was weird is like, when he's not Bane or when he's like the little wimpy Version, were they playing like baby crying sounds? Yeah, yeah, it's like, what the fuck, dude?

[Matt Mira]

Also, that guy's supposed to be like a hardened serial killer mass murderer.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, man, they. Yeah, well, yeah, that guy was a mass killer. Like, I mean, I guess he had the body of Jeffrey. I bet you that's what they were kind of going for.

[Matt Mira]

But of course it was Schumacher.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, Schumacher really got in there.

[Matt Mira]

So what he does is he puts the gay men in the tubs of acid.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

What about the. I was gonna say Mr. Freeze's car fires like 30 missiles and Mrs. Everything. Yeah, none of them hit.

[Matt Mira]

Also, if you watch back, the big moment for Barbara when she jumps off of her motorcycle, there's no reason for her to do so. And then she lands on Robin's wind power surf car that goes over ice and then looks to her right, and the motorcycle, perfectly intact, still moving. She jumps back on it.

[Jesse Falcon]

She just afraid that she was gonna hit.

[Matt Mira]

I don't know.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I do also like the first line of this movie is I want a car. That is the first line of Batman Robin. And he goes, chicks dig the car. He's like, you have your bat motorcycle, whatever it is, but that's the first line of a bat movie. I want a car.

[Jesse Falcon]

It does set the tone for this film pretty, pretty strongly. I mean, like, they really are getting kids.

[Matt Mira]

Don't you want a car?

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, man. There might as well be the first.

[Paul Scheer]

Line of the commercial for the Batmobile toys.

[Matt Mira]

I'm sure it was.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

By the way, turn on some fucking lights. In this world, every room is in complete darkness. There's not a single lit thing. And it's a disadvantage, I think, for everybody. But yeah, the whole movie is just. It's dark. It's dark, but not like Tim Burton dark and interesting. It's just like. No, no, no. We'll just have really low lights.

[Jesse Falcon]

Well, let you bring up Tim Burton. I want to play what if for a second. Okay. Because this is. This is kind of the temperature of the times. And this is what they were. This is what Warner Brothers really wanted to do here. If this movie had been a success, their plan would obviously have been to do another one. They signed Joel Schumacher to do another one. But there was another property that they were developing at that time with Tim Burton. Burton, which was the failed Nicolas Cage as Superman film. I don't know if you've seen some of the work that Steve Johnson and his special effects team have done online, but there's a bunch of costume tests of the suit and it's really incredible just because it's so far away from anything that we know about the character. It's Tim Burton's interpretation of Superman as played by Nicolas Cage. And there are pictures of Nic Cage with a gigantic mullet which Superman was wearing at that time.

[Matt Mira]

He had long hair.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah, just in the back.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And.

[Jesse Falcon]

And so the mind wanders into the possibilities of there being a world's finest. Nicholas Cage, George Clooney, what that would.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Have been like, that would have been amazing. Just Nicolas Cage and. I mean, but maybe Clooney doesn't stick around. So who would be the next. Who would be the Next guy in 1980s 90s Casper Van Dean.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah. Okay.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Hot off of Starship Troopers. Get him in. But yeah, I mean, and George Clooney. I like George Clooney. He's fine in this movie. But it's like. But man, George Clooney and Nicolas Cage together would have been.

[Paul Scheer]

Oh, that would have been unbelievable.

[Matt Mira]

The world is robbed of yet another. How did this get made?

[Paul Scheer]

The ultimate. How did this get made?

[Jesse Falcon]

It really would have been.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I would have loved to have seen that. I mean, basically, if this movie was successful, Christopher Nolan's Batman movies would never exist because this killed the franchise. This was done. I mean, and if it continued, we would be in like. It'd be like a bad James Bond series. It'd be like Batman 12. And here's another lesser known villain.

[Matt Mira]

I can't even. I don't even want to think about that. It's so bad. And this is this movie too. I really. It's really very noticeable that Batman can't turn his neck. Like, he cannot turn his neck.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah.

[Matt Mira]

Like, it's very. He's making a lot of big moves here.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, his neck is clearly, what a disadvantage. It looks like a guy in a neck bracelet. It's like just always looking up and never being able to look at.

[Jesse Falcon]

My single favorite shot in the movie is when they're riding their vehicles across the tops of the city and the Batmobile jumps off and Freeze freezes it and he ejects and then he flies through the windshield of Freeze's vehicle. And then the next shot you see, it's a very quick shot, but it's the fucking weirdest shot in the whole movie because they don't do this. So you see the next shot you see is his cape, and then it kind of becomes unfolded and Mr. Freeze is laying on the ground and Batman standing over him in a pose, like, holding up his arms. It's a really quick shot and it's almost like I got him. It was the weirdest shot because it's almost like, I don't know, it wasn't necessary, but it was so weird.

[Matt Mira]

Did you guys notice when Poison Ivy's plant hangs Batman up like the cape attached at the thigh with string? It's like, really?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

And also another great chance to get an ass shot in there. Yeah, solid ass shot.

[Announcer]

Summer is just around the corner and the folks at Mint Mobile have a hot take. Getting summer bod is out and getting your savings bod is in. You hear what I'm saying? This spring and summer, everyone wants skimpy wireless bills and fat wallets. And with premium wireless plans for just 15 bucks a month, you can have both without breaking a spot, sweat or break in the bank. Now, all plans come with a high speed data and unlimited talk and text delivered on the nation's largest 5G network. I've told you about our producer Scott. He switched to Mint Mobile because his old provider kept on jacking up his price. And he said he hasn't noticed any change in the quality of his service. But now he's paying $40 less a month. Okay, this year, skip breaking a sweat and breaking the bank. Bank and get your summer savings and shop premium wireless [e-mail] hdtgm that's mintmobile.com hdtgm upfront payments of $45 for 3 month 5 gigabyte plan required equivalent to $15 a month new customer offer for first 3 months only. Then full price plan options available, taxes and fees extra. See Mint Mobile for details. You know, as temperatures climb, it's easy to fall into that same old routine. You know, the familiar tanks, the worn in shorts, the usual lineup. But the thing with quints is they offer a wardrobe upgrade that's effortless, elevated, easy pieces that instantly refine the everyday uniform that you wear without extra effort. I love quints. Okay, Quint's started off as being my go to place to go get some maybe higher end items. And now it is a part of my everyday clothing purchase. Not that I shop every single day, but my everyday wear. Here's the thing. Quint has got options for you. Whether you like 100% European linen shorts and dresses from $30 Luxe Swimwear, Italian leather platform sandals. So much more. Your summer starts at Quint. And here's the best part. Quint is priced 50 to 80% less than what you would find at similar brands. By working directly with top artisans and cutting out the middlemen, Quint gives you luxury without. So why don't you treat your closet to a little summer glow? Up with quint. Go to quints.combonkers for free shipping on your order and 365 day returns. That's Quince Q-I-N-C-E.combonkers to get free shipping and 365 day returns. Quince.combonkers putting off that dream trip because, I don't know, you're nervous that you don't speak the language. And how will you survive in a foreign country if you don't understand anything? Well, don't sweat it because Babbel's got your back. Start speaking a new language with the confidence and that a person who grew up speaking the language has. When you use Babbel's conversation based technique that quickly teaches you useful words and phrases about things you actually talk about in the real world. That's why I love Babbel. Babbel's tips and tools for learning a new language are approachable and accessible. It's like having a private tutor in your pocket. You know, I love Babbel because whenever I have a moment of downtime, I can pop in and do a lesson I can actually learn on my own time. It's long term memorization that doesn't feel like work. Plus Babbel has these amazing games for sentence building and spelling reinforcing enforcement. Learn another language. Babel is gifting our listeners 55% off [e-mail] bonkers get up to 55% [e-mail] bonkers spelled B A B B E L.com bonkers babbel.com bonkers rules and restrictions may apply.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay, so man, obviously we had some opinions about this movie, you know, and I would say that we didn't love it. But there are some people out there out there, some people who really, really liked it. And I culled together some five star reviews from Amazon for a second opinion. This is from Ryan. Honestly, if you like Batman movies, action movies or any kind of movie, I recommend this movie to you.

[Matt Mira]

Ryan.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So that is a five star review.

[Jesse Falcon]

Well, how old was Ryan?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We'll see when you're a kid. On Amazon it says kid review so he must be older.

[Jesse Falcon]

You can cheat that though.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is the one that kind of got a little dark. Cheryl Kane Neal writes, no matter what.

[Announcer]

The source of the crime, these heroes gave it their all in protection of human life.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Even though these epics of action and adventure, they were best portrayed with dignity and comfort.

[Matt Mira]

Comfort Comfort.

[Jesse Falcon]

Wow, what is that?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This woman really had a moment writing this.

[Matt Mira]

Wait, what was Gossip Gertie's real name again?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Okay, this is another. Another one. Jeffrey writes. What's wrong with this movie? I don't care what you say. The film is good other than the directing and the plot being a little bit bad, but that's nothing. None of the directing is bad and the script is bad, but that's nothing. Forget about it. That. And then he finishes off his review by saying this. He reviews all the Batman movies. Batman, bad. Batman Returns. Terrible. Batman Forever, Bad. Batman Begins. Christopher Nolan's terrible. Batman and Robin. Excellent. Five stars. The only one that he liked. And Batman. And just so Batman Returns and Batman Begins, both terrorists. Batman, at least is just bad.

[Jesse Falcon]

Wow, that's Incredible.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Nominated for 11 Razzies. 11 Razzies on this movie. A big. A big, big accomplishment. Is there anything that we haven't talked about that you guys. That popped out to you? Anything else that we.

[Jesse Falcon]

It's just, you know, it's really funny is the randomness that happens. It's like there's no really cohesive, you know, storytelling message throughout the film because they just keep throwing weirder and weirder shit. This, this, you know, the Scooby Doo special effect sound effects, and it's added midway through.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

So it's like, I feel like people made changes. Like, even Uma Thurman, she's dressed all sexy the entire time. And then all of a sudden, like, in one scene, she's in like a full green jumper. It's like, wait, wait, bring back the sexy version of her. Like, she should be in that.

[Paul Scheer]

Boy, I couldn't make heads or tails out of Uma Thurman's character at all. Oh, I mean, I didn't know what she was doing. I didn't know what her point was. She was truly. Like, there were so many characters in this movie that it's just a mess.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, I mean, her. I mean, her character basically just wants to save the. Have the plants come back. But she also is upset when Mr. Freeze says he has a wife. He like, she's been killing all the men. And then like, Freeze is like, I have to save my wife. And she's like, oh, you have a wife, huh?

[Matt Mira]

Didn't mention that woman show.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah. It's like, but what do you want to do?

[Paul Scheer]

By the way, Great Poison Ivy.

[Matt Mira]

Anytime, Anytime.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That's a pretty.

[Matt Mira]

But what was very funny is when the epic, the fight with Batgirl, she pulls out a two and a half inch tiny blade that looks very dull and won't cut anything. And then they have her check her fucking makeup while she's fighting.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

You know what? Chicks dig that stuff, man. That's what ladies do.

[Jesse Falcon]

That's how ladies fight. Have you ever been to the fucking Bronx? That's how they fight. That.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Not only is this movie set back filmmaking, it set back vision of women in action movies. It set back racial stereotypes. Every takes a giant step back. And it must have been crazy because you feel like George Clooney must have been like, oh fuck, did I blow it?

[Matt Mira]

Did I like, should I have been staying on? Er, yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This is the movie that he put it in.

[Jesse Falcon]

It's funny cause you could find videos of him online going, I killed the Batman franchise.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh yeah, he talks about it.

[Jesse Falcon]

He's really open about like. I think he was in the, like he got called to the president of Warner Brothers office and the guy's like, doesn't even give him an option. He's like, you're the next Batman. And he's like, oh, okay, I guess I'm doing that now, you know, so work is work, you know, I mean, he had.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I mean, there was a rough little moment there for him. I feel like that was. I mean. Cause it's like what happens next to George Clooney? But he obviously came back and did it.

[Matt Mira]

It made 60 something million its first weekend and then its total domestic was like 103.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wait, this Batman movie?

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Wait, I thought it says here on wga. Oh, I thought it was much smaller than that. Let's see, it says here. Oh yeah, you're right. Total gross, 237 worldwide.

[Matt Mira]

That's worldwide.

[Jesse Falcon]

It paid for itself, but only just know. And it's, it's. It made everybody reevaluate what the fuck they were doing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Pretty much. People say this is the worst superhero made movie made of all time. And I totally agree.

[Jesse Falcon]

There's a lot of bad ones.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jesse Falcon]

Catwoman.

[Matt Mira]

Catwoman's awful.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

We've talked about it.

[Matt Mira]

But Roger Corman, Fantastic Four.

[Jesse Falcon]

Oh, that's Howard the Duck. Another, another. I get to throw Marvel under the bus a little bit. I mean, they deserve that for those two.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Do you want to hear the first and third choice for Mr. Freeze?

[Jesse Falcon]

Yes.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, first of all, Arnold Schwarzenegger. Not the first choice to play Mr. Freeze. Who do you think the first choice to play Mr. Freeze was?

[Jesse Falcon]

I'm gonna say Kevin Costner.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Go.

[Matt Mira]

Tom Hanks.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Jason.

[Paul Scheer]

I'm guessing Robin Williams.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Anthony Hopkins. Oh, Anthony Hopkins said no.

[Matt Mira]

So you do meet Joe Bless.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That would have been amazing that. I really want to see that now. Third choice, Hulk Hogan.

[Jesse Falcon]

I cannot see Hulk Hogan turning down.

[Matt Mira]

At the time, it was Hollywood Hulk Hogan. He never would have turned it down.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, my gosh.

[Jesse Falcon]

Wow.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That I cannot believe. Anthony Hopkins, though, would have been amazing.

[Jesse Falcon]

The tiny little iceman or from his Freeze.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

That would be great. That whole movie. Because just the script probably would not have changed in him running around in that costume.

[Jesse Falcon]

All the puns like to go from Hannibal Lecter to fucking Captain Freeze pun.

[Paul Scheer]

And now we'd have Arnold Schwarzenegger, no doubt, as Odin in the Thor movies.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, man, it is.

[Matt Mira]

What a mess.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

This movie is great. You have to see. You have. It is hard to find. I found it on Amazon for very cheap. You can buy them used and stuff there. But I recommend seeing it. You have to, at all costs. You would recommend seeing it, right?

[Matt Mira]

Oh, I mean, just try it. See if you can get through it.

[Jesse Falcon]

I would absolutely recommend. If you're with a bunch of buddies and you want to have a laugh. People spent a lot of time and energy making this thing.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

$125 million went into this movie. Now, you said there was something, a callback in the Animated Series, right?

[Jesse Falcon]

I just thought this was so cool. There was an episode of the Animated Series, it was kind of later on where it was centered. The episode centered around these three little boys. And none of them have actually seen the Batman. They live in Gotham. They heard about the legend, and each little boy tells their own version of what they think the Batman really is. And the first one tells this story about, oh, my uncle saw him one night at a. He was a museum security guard. And they. And the story that he tells is animated in the style of the opening of the old live action TV show where it really looks like that animated style. Then the next kid has a style where he's telling a story where it's basically the Dark Knight Returns. And then before the third kid can tell his story, this one kid named Joel shows up and he's got a boa wrapped around his neck and he's coming out of his dad's store and his dad's a shoemaker. And he's like, I see the Batman has having, like, nipples and, like, you see his butt all the time. And they're like, come on, Joel. He doesn't do that. It's completely inaccurate. So like, even like, the people who create the canon for Batman were like, dude, this was horrible.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Well, I mean, I think it breaks the general rule of Batman. Batman Is like a social gadfly in this. Not Bruce Wayne.

[Jesse Falcon]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Batman, like, Batman is invited to events.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Goes to events. He, like, hangs out for photo ops. It's like Batman.

[Paul Scheer]

There might as well be a scene where he's, like, a dj.

[Matt Mira]

Yeah.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

If it was made now, he would totally be, like, DJing every Friday. Friday at the Hard Rock. Ditch Fridays. He'd be there all the time.

[Jesse Falcon]

I will tell you and remind you that in Batman Returns, Batman did scratch a cd. I don't know if you remember that part. He recorded the villain's monologue so he could out the Penguin as being a bad guy, not really the real mayor. And as he's playing it, it's like a bat CD player with a bat logo on the CD from the Batcave. And he's playing it. He's like, this town's gonna rot, and this town's gonna forget. Forget rot. And it's like Michael Keaton's there, like, scratching the cd, so it already happened.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Oh, man. I love it. I love it. I love it. And it makes you. And I think I've just gotten so brainwashed to the Chris Nolan version of Batman that it's so shocking that this is a successful franchise.

[Matt Mira]

I just can't imagine being George Clooney and watching that movie at the premiere and just thinking, everyone.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Yeah, everyone.

[Jesse Falcon]

Even Elle McPherson, like, why did I do this? This was bad for my care.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

I should never have done it. Even Chris o' Donnell. I read this article where he said that whenever he would complain about the script, Joel Schumacher would go, shut up. It's a comic. So he would just. Yeah, it was ridiculous. Well, go check out this movie. Do whatever you can. Thank you very much to all of our guests. Matt, Jesse, thank you so much. Would you guys have anything to plug?

[Matt Mira]

Anything you want to tune in to attack the show at 7 o' clock weekdays on G4 and listen to the Nerdist podcast.

[Jesse Falcon]

If you don't already, you can follow me on Twitter jscott with1t falcon and go buy some great Marvel products, guys.

[Matt Mira]

There you go.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Like it? Ntsfsdsuv. The show I do on Adult Swim is coming back this week, August 9, 12:15, following Children's Hospital. Check that out. Join. June is in it.

[Announcer]

I'm in it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Bunch of great people are in it. You like it? I think it's second season. It's good. And Jason, what do you got?

[Jesse Falcon]

Nothing.

[Paul Scheer]

Really, guys. I got really nothing to plug.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

All right.

[Paul Scheer]

Feel really bad about it.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Hey, you know what? It's cool don't worry about it, man. It's. Sometimes we hit freaking.

[Matt Mira]

Freaking out.

[Paul Scheer]

I should have thought of something to plug.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

All right, well, we have our T shirts. They're amazing. The Crank two T shirts. Thank you to everybody here at Earwolf, Dave Steffi, for pulling these clips for us every single week. We'll see you next time. Bye. Bye. Citizens, since we each upgraded to Xfinity.

[Jesse Falcon]

In our homes, the WI fi has been booming.

[Announcer]

It's fair to say our town has.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Officially become a boom town.

[Jesse Falcon]

Mayor, will I be able to drop into multiplayer gaming battles with low lag?

[Jason Mantzoukas]

The lag won't be an issue, but your questionable skills may be. And what if I have hundreds of devices on the WI Fi? Purely hypothetical. Seems like a lot, but sure, hundreds of devices, all booming together with the Xfinity Gateway.

[Announcer]

Yes, friends and neighbors, with Xfinity, the.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

WI fi is booming. Restrictions apply.

[Announcer]

Your mom loves to talk on the.

[Jason Mantzoukas]

Phone with her friends.

[Announcer]

If she ate bunches of oats instead of just oats, she wouldn't do it on speakers. Your phone in public. Not only are honey bunches of oats delicious and nutritious, but they'll help keep her from recounting the plot of her steamy romance novel while in the grocery store. Don't just eat oats. Eat bunches of oats, honey bunches of oats.