How Did This Get Made? – Merry Kissmas w/ Jessica St. Clair

Date: December 12, 2025
Hosts: Paul Scheer, June Diane Raphael, Jason Mantzoukas
Guest: Jessica St. Clair

Episode Overview

The How Did This Get Made? crew gathers for their annual holiday livestream, joined by comedian Jessica St. Clair, to gleefully pick apart Merry Kissmas — a made-for-TV Christmas romance apparently financed by Kay Jewelers. The panel dissects the film’s awkward relationships, lack of movie magic, props, plot holes, and wild choices (from accents to facial hair), while spiraling into comedic tangents about elevator kisses, dog cookies, and the unsung magic of socks.

Main Themes and Purpose

• Celebrate (“Wallow in”) Bad Holiday Movies: The team examines the finer (and unfiner) points of Merry Kissmas, marveling at its head-scratching creative decisions and unintentional hilarity.
• Magic of Christmas? Or the Absurdity of Filmmaking? Despite earnest holiday cues, the movie leaves the panel mystified by its half-baked magical elements and bizarre plot mechanics.
• Comedic Riffs on Romance Tropes, Kink, and Product Placement: Beyond the movie, the hosts detour to discuss mistletoe, elevator “magic”, Kay Jewelers product placement, and even foot fashion philosophy.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. The Plot and the Elevator “Magic”

• Quick Recap: Paul summarizes (02:14):
  "It’s about a young woman who is in love but falls out of love when mistletoe forces her to kiss a man that she realizes is her true soulmate. I think that’s roughly the plot."
• Magic or Not?:
  • Multiple elements (the elevator, Doris Roberts’s character, Santa, a pond) seem poised for Christmas magic, but nothing’s ever truly explained and the so-called magic is underwhelming (05:34).
  • Quote (06:05):
    Paul: “But is it magic? Is it magic?” June: “The movie keeps wanting you to feel magic … but it’s always in service of no magic.”

2. Doris Roberts, Elevator Kisses, and Sexual Weirdness

• Iconic Doris Roberts: She plays the “magical” older woman, but the panel finds her more predatory than enchanting.
  • June: “She might have kicked off a magical thing with a kiss. … No magic.”
  • Jason: “The only sexual chemistry that anybody had was between the cousins.” (03:34)
• Elevator Kisses & Consent: The hosts riff on the recurring motif of unsolicited kisses.
  • Jason: “If you’re standing in an elevator and someone rushed in and just started kissing you…” (22:03)
  • June: “Few people in this movie are receiving kisses that they wanted. … Many of the kisses are unprompted and surprising.” (69:02)
• Movie’s Core Kink: Jason: “Are we comfortable with this sexy elevator play? I would love it to be consensual.” (81:03)

3. Baffling Characters & Performances

• Carlton (Fiancé/Director):
  • His accent drifts, and he sports what the hosts call “Mondrian” and “Tony Stark” beards.
  • June: “Not only would he not be on the marquee, it wouldn't be just a random candid photo…”
• The Cousins’ Chemistry:
  • Jason maintains this is the film’s only convincing romantic energy (03:34, 14:09).
• Kayla (Lead):
  • June and Jessica defend her, praising the chemistry of the leads.
  • June: “She is engaged to be married, leaves a planning meeting for her engagement party, runs, chases a man into an elevator and begins to make out.” (15:41)

4. Setting, Props, and Hallmark Tropes

• “Nowhere Looks Like Christmas”
  • Jason: “It ain’t Christmas, bitch.” (11:48)
  • The fake-snow, excessive winterwear, and lack of Christmasy atmosphere are derided.
• Kay Jewelers Product Placement
  • Paul: “Kay's jeweler must have also paid for the bracelet. Yes, the bracelet. That's the colors of Christmas.” (34:17)
  • The panel lambasts the ugly jewelry integration ("that bracelet makes me want to barf" – Jason, 34:57).

5. Hallmark Hallmarks

• Plot Devices Galore:
  • Wishes with Santa, dog adoption, bakery fundraising, quirky townspeople.
  • June: “This writer just took all of them. … Instead of just like, you take four and then write around the four.” (73:54)
• Montages with No Progress:
  • Costume changes suggest days pass within an afternoon, with scenes often ending where they begin (66:07).

6. Production Details and Funny Discoveries

• Director and Writer's Odd Résumés:
  • Director previously did dog Christmas and serial killer movies (04:34).
  • Writer specializes in elevator-romance films and runs “Passion Flicks” with Elon Musk’s sister (75:08).
• Crew as Cast:
  • The line producer plays the bellhop (74:51).
• Cameo:
  • Brant Daugherty (star of the movie) offers a hilarious video segment:
    • “This movie was written by an insane person… She’s written exclusively holiday films where the leads kiss in an elevator. … Doris Roberts… pulls me and kisses me, slips me the fucking tongue, and then slaps me and walks away.” (56:23–57:56)

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

03:45 – Jason Mantzoukas:
"The only sexual chemistry that anybody had was between the cousins."

06:05 – Paul and June:
"But is it magic? Is it magic?"
"The movie keeps wanting you to feel magic… but it’s always in service of no magic."

11:48 – Jason Mantzoukas:
"Yeah. And it ain't Christmas, bitch."

22:03 – Jason Mantzoukas:
"What would you do, honestly, if you're standing in an elevator, someone rushed in and just started kissing you?"

34:57 – Jason Mantzoukas:
"That bracelet makes me want to barf."

56:23 – Brant Daugherty (Movie Star Cameo):
"This movie was written by an insane person…I looked up her résumé, and it turns out she's written exclusively holiday films where the leads kiss in an elevator. … Doris Roberts… pulls me and kisses me, slips me the fucking tongue, and then slaps me and walks away. Anyway, the movie makes no sense on a cellular level from moment to moment."

81:03 – Jason Mantzoukas:
"Are we comfortable with this sexy elevator play? I would love it to be consensual, is all I'm saying."

Important Segments & Timestamps

• 00:00–01:43: (Skip; Ads and Intro)
• 02:14: Paul summarizes the plot.
• 03:45: Jason observes the cousin chemistry.
• 06:05: The “magic” discussion.
• 11:48: Jason delivers his “it ain’t Christmas, bitch” verdict.
• 15:41–16:19: The morality of Kayla’s elevator affair, Martha Stewart digression.
• 22:03: Hypothetical elevator kissing etiquette conversation.
• 34:17–34:57: Kay Jewelers bracelet/product placement dissection.
• 56:23–57:56: Brant Daugherty's behind-the-scenes story.
• 66:07: Montage and time-passing confusion.
• 69:02: Face grabbing and non-consensual kiss analysis.
• 74:51: Revelation of bellhop/line producer and writer’s streaming service.
• 81:03: Elevator kink/consent riff.
• 82:44: Jason and June pitch the movie that should have been made: "Soft Magic: The Elevator."
• 83:46: Would the panel recommend the film? (General consensus: "Sure, for holiday background, but it's a baffling experience.")

Recurring Jokes and Tangents

• “Merry Kissmas and a Happy Blow Year”
  • A running gag about the film’s lack of actual sexual energy despite the suggestive premise (03:04, 55:55).
• Sock Talk:
  • Lengthy sidetrack about the emotional journey of upgrading socks and the semiotics of playful versus “serious” socks (50:01–53:55).
• Product Placement Disasters:
  • Kay Jewelers, Bombas, and the intrusive branding in “holiday movies.”
• Elevator Kissing Kink:
  • Affectionately dubbed “elevator play” or, for the UK, “lift play” (81:14).
• Cousin Chemistry & Older Women:
  • Jokes about the relative ages of female characters (“Every woman in this is elderly”—39:48) and alternate pairings.

Listener Value

• Get the full plot saga without seeing the film,
• Relive the funniest riffs and running jokes,
• Enjoy actual insight into how generic holiday movies are constructed,
• Hear the bizarre and actual behind-the-scenes details straight from an actor,
• Absorb the podcast’s mix of affectionate mockery, disbelief, and comedic invention.

Conclusion

How Did This Get Made’s deep-dive into Merry Kissmas is a hilarious, if slightly exasperated, chronicle of a movie where logic, magic, and romantic chemistry go to die, saved only by the hosts’ glee and the endless tangents they wring from the film’s many oddities. Whether you’re seeking a blueprint for every so-bad-they’re-funny holiday film or simply want some “soft magic” in your podcast lineup, this episode wraps itself up as a comedic gift.

Recommended Segments:

• Behind-the-scenes with Brant Daugherty (56:23)
• The mistletoe/elevator/high-velocity consent discussion (21:06–23:43)
• Product placement roasting (34:17–35:07)
• Elevator kink/soft magic riff (81:03–82:51)

Essential Quote:
"Sorted. Yes, absolutely for the thing. But if you're going to be watching … put this in the mix…" — June Diane Raphael (82:57)

End of Summary