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Anna McGuire
Hymns for the road is a fiction podcast that often takes place inside a moving vehicle. Listener discretion is advised while driving. General content warnings are listed in the show notes.
Silver
We need more water, Silver.
Glass
Really? We topped off not too long ago.
Amber
I think that one summer folk in that desert shorted us.
Glass
Maybe.
Amber
Is anybody else hungry? Copper? Silver?
Silver
I'm kind of hungry.
Copper
I don't want to stop at a diner, if that's what you're asking.
Amber
Come on, Amber. They don't seem that bad.
Glass
I've been to a diner. They're just like everywhere else. You just gotta be careful, that's all.
Copper
I remember enough from before. I know what to expect from a diner that's open after dark.
Amber
And what's that?
Copper
Grimy?
Amber
Hm. I wouldn't guess that would be an object for you.
Copper
Oh, shut up, Glass. Nothing seems that bad to you?
Glass
You know, before the change, there were really nice restaurants in some places.
Copper
What's your definition of nice?
Glass
They had really fancy food and you had to dress up to go. Or you didn't have to, but people would judge you if you didn't.
Amber
Was it worth it?
Glass
Sometimes. Food was always really good. Always. Kind of like the grimy ones. Better, though. More of a heart to them.
Copper
Maybe when they were run by people.
Glass
Yeah, when they were run by people.
Amber
I'm starving, guys.
Silver
Me too.
Copper
Are we going to get water first?
Amber
Maybe we can get both. You know, two birds with one stone.
Glass
Restaurants usually have water.
Silver
What do we have to trade?
Glass
I got a few pages in my sketchbook I could part with.
Copper
We still have a bunch of that gold leaf, too.
Amber
Oh, look. There's a sign up there. Copper.
Silver
The rusty billboard. Open all night.
Copper
Looks crappy.
Amber
Looks perfect.
Copper
We pass by another billboard, it looks like it hasn't been changed or cleaned in a thousand years. Like it was around before. Before I noticed the colors. It's impossible not to notice the colors. Colors that don't exist in nature. I don't know how to describe it. Other than maybe purplish, brownish, melancholy.
Silver
It looks perfect.
Amber
Wow. Look in the windows. There are actually people in there.
Copper
They're right. I can see a couple loners sitting in there by themselves at booths over half eaten meals. I wonder if they're actually human or if they just look like it. They seem happy enough.
Glass
They got a spigot on the side of the building.
Silver
Should we go inside and get food first? We can pay for the water in the process, too.
Amber
Sounds good to me.
Copper
Nothing about this place seems off at all. Every place seems off to me. Every place is off.
Glass
We need the water, so we've got to go in for at least a second.
Amber
Yeah, I'm sure everything will be fine.
Copper
None of you are worried about this. It doesn't seem. I don't know, a little too good to be true to anyone else. Silver.
Glass
As long as we follow the rules, we'll be all right. Starting to get cold out here.
Amber
Let's get inside. Come on.
Silver
World's best hash browns. I guess we'll see, won't we?
Copper
Of course they have the world's best hash browns. Copper. It says so right on the sign.
Amber
It's probably easy to take that title if you're the only place that serves hash browns.
Copper
We walk in and right away it smells like grease. Not in a bad way. Just that heavy kind of smell that coats your teeth. There are more people in here than it looks like from the outside. Actual people too, I think.
Amber
Seems like a nice place.
Copper
Sure does draw you in, huh?
Glass
What do you think, cobber?
Silver
The falls, maybe. It doesn't seem like springs.
Glass
That's what I think, too.
Copper
Look, they have the rules printed right here. There's a chalkboard on the wall in the entryway that says, no shirt, no shoes, no service. And a painted tin sign that says disorderly. Patrons will be to leave. Silver and Copper are right. It's gotta be the falls. There's just so much stuff in here. All these picture frames and clothes nailed to the walls. Tiny little trinkets stacked up on counters. All of it's covered with a mix of grease and dust. Smells like it, too. If this was a house of spring operation, they wouldn't leave all the windows closed.
Waiter
Evening looking for a table.
Copper
Not a winter. It might be a tricky spring, though.
Waiter
The waiter's so happy these travelers stopped.
Copper
In there it is. Third person. House of fall.
Glass
This party would appreciate that, darling. If the host is able.
Amber
It'd be nice to be by a window.
Waiter
Ah, well, the waiter will See where they can put these sweet patrons.
Glass
Put one there.
Amber
Nicely done.
Glass
You were right, copper. It's the Falls.
Silver
Amber brought in the stuff.
Copper
I'll take a look at what we've got at the table.
Glass
We got a lot stored up. I don't think we'll have a problem affording it.
Waiter
Route this way.
Copper
Maybe Glass is right. Maybe it's not so bad. Maybe a little dirty, little dingy. But the food smells good. And that's really all that needs to matter. In places like this. The waiter's body looks weird. Not unusually weird for one of them. But it looks a little bit like they're hiding something else in the back of their shirt. Like there's another creature where their ribcage should be. And I don't like the way they're looking at me.
Waiter
Right here. Can the waiter get everybody some waters to start?
Glass
Yes, please. The party's gonna take a minute to look at the menu before they decide on anything, sweetheart.
Waiter
Well, in that case, the waiter will be back soon with the table's orders.
Amber
With the table's orders?
Silver
They haven't ordered anything yet.
Waiter
Don't they worry there? Sweet little heads. The diner already knows what its patrons want.
Glass
All right, y'all, we'll check the food when it gets here. But be polite.
Copper
That didn't seem. I don't know. Nobody feels weird that they already know what we want.
Amber
Amber, we'll be all right. You're just anxious because you're hungry.
Copper
Maybe you're right.
Silver
What do they have?
Copper
Is there a point in asking if they already decided what we want?
Amber
Usual stuff. Burgers, sandwiches, waffles, Biscuits and gravy.
Copper
Look at this one on the special menu at the bottom.
Silver
That hurts my eyes.
Copper
Yeah, it gives you a little headache if you look right at it.
Glass
I don't think we're supposed to order that.
Amber
Probably not.
Silver
It's nice in here, guys.
Copper
Why didn't I notice the windows?
Glass
It is nice. Not half bad.
Copper
Why didn't I notice the windows when we came in?
Amber
Anybody else kind of excited about what they're gonna get?
Silver
Pancakes, I hope with bacon. Really greasy bacon.
Glass
I know what I want.
Copper
Guys, look out the window. What?
Silver
Amber, look.
Amber
Dark out there.
Copper
It's dark out there.
Unknown
Glass.
Copper
There's nothing out there.
Glass
Nothing's ever the way you expect it to be, Amber. It's not hurting us, so leave it be.
Copper
Outside the window is an ink black void. Even darker than if they had just painted over the windows. No setting sun, twilight outside. No stars. No pavement under the light from inside. No Billboard. Solid.
Waiter
Cold.
Copper
Dark. My reflection stares back. It looks unfamiliar. Which is sort of comforting, I guess, since it always looks unfamiliar. But we could see inside from the.
Glass
Parking lot of those things, I suppose.
Copper
I guess.
Waiter
Thanks for waiting. Party. Busy night tonight.
Glass
The party wasn't waiting long at all.
Waiter
Fish and chips.
Amber
Thanks.
Waiter
Chicken and dumplings.
Glass
Thank them.
Waiter
Pancakes. Scrambled eggs and bacon. And tater tot casserole. Enjoy.
Copper
No way.
Amber
I didn't even know lingcod was around anymore.
Silver
Look how thick this bacon is.
Glass
And no way they made it right. Oh, it's perfect.
Amber
Dig in, everybody.
Copper
It does look perfect, doesn't it? Help. Tastes perfect, too. Food isn't always dangerous. If it was, we would have all starved by now. You can trust it as long as you pay for it. And we can. We have more than enough. It's cheap. It's really cheap. It's kind of crazy how cheap all of this is, isn't it? Everybody's eating. Of course they are. The food's amazing. The best we've had in. The best you've had. Maybe I take another bite. It's greasy and rich and delicious. Hell, I feel like I'm never going to be hungry again. Glass. Glass. I said I feel like I'm never going to be hungry again.
Amber
Huh? Oh, yeah.
Copper
There was a bell over the door as we came in. It hasn't rung again since. I'm going to ask about getting some water from outside. Um, pardon.
Waiter
What can the waiter do for their customer?
Copper
Amber wants to know how much it would add to the party's tab to fill up their water cooler using the diner spigot outside.
Waiter
Don't worry about the tab. The party only has to pay after they finish their food.
Copper
I am. Has finished their.
Waiter
It doesn't look like they have.
Copper
Thanks.
Waiter
Let the waiter know if they can bring any desserts.
Copper
We need to get out of here.
Amber
Hey, don't shake. I mean me up. I'm chewing.
Copper
Nobody in this diner has left the diner. Silver. Silver. They won't let us leave. All the other patrons are just sitting in their booths. Just sitting there. Plates half empty. Half empty.
Glass
I don't want to leave. Amber. I'm not done yet.
Copper
Copper. Hey, Copper.
Waiter
Wake up.
Silver
I'm not asleep. I'm just hungry.
Copper
Screw it. There's somebody at that corner booth, face down on the table. They haven't moved since we got here. Pardon again. Amber would like the check for that table over there. They'd like to pay.
Waiter
The waiter's real. Sorry. It doesn't look like Amber's Friends are finished eating. Why doesn't Amber wait until they're finished?
Copper
There is a person face down in the corner booth. They'd like to leave now.
Waiter
They can stay as long as they'd like. The diner's happy to have them.
Copper
Thanks. The party appreciates it. You know why they're still face down in that booth, don't you? Everybody finish up. We're leaving.
Silver
I'm not done.
Copper
Yeah, you are. Let's go. Glass. Come on.
Amber
Leave me alone. Amber.
Copper
There is a dead person in the corner booth, Guys.
Glass
So?
Copper
So wait. I've got it. I'm paying and we're leaving.
Waiter
Customers don't need to leave until they're all done.
Copper
Thanks, but the party is all paid up. See? They'll be heading out now. Copper, tie your shoes.
Silver
I'm not ready yet.
Copper
Save your shoes.
Silver
Amber.
Waiter
Give me your shoes.
Copper
What?
Waiter
Why? What does Amber think they're doing?
Copper
Look, no shoes.
Waiter
Put those back on.
Copper
Or how about this? No shirt and no shoes.
Waiter
Well, the patron has already received service though, haven't they?
Copper
I they. How about this? Is this disorderly conduct? Is Amber being disorderly now?
Waiter
Jeez, Amber heard the other guests seem terribly disturbed.
Copper
Yeah. What if they start knocking tables over? What if they sing a. No.
Unknown
Don'T by by Miss American Pie? Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was drive.
Waiter
What are you doing?
Unknown
Them good old boys drinking whiskey and R sing this will be the day that I die.
Waiter
Waiter really thinks Amber should stop doing that.
Copper
Die?
Unknown
Did you write the book of love? And do you have faith in God above? If the Bible tells tells you so.
Copper
Come on y'all now you believe in.
Unknown
Rock and rol music Save your mortal soul and can you teach me how to dance?
Waiter
The real dancing in the matter Well.
Unknown
I know that you're in love with him Cuz you saw you dancing in the gym you both kicked off your shoes.
Copper
They're calling us saints.
Unknown
Lonely teenage bronch and butt with a pink carnation and a pickup truck But I knew I was out of the day.
Amber
Hey, better move those plates or we'll be stepping on him.
Unknown
Silver.
Copper
Come on, Silver.
Unknown
Bye bye Miss American pot drove my sherry. Silver try.
Waiter
That's enough. Much better. Oh, sorry about that. Customers. More coffee.
Unknown
This'll be the day that I die.
Copper
I can't believe that worked.
Amber
I can't believe we didn't listen to you.
Waiter
Where's your shirt?
Glass
You did good, alright. I'm proud of you. We wouldn't have gotten out of that spell without you.
Silver
Yeah. How did you do that anyways?
Copper
I don't know, but I'm only useful once a year, so I hope you're grateful.
Amber
Oh, come on. What are you talking about? You're useful all the time.
Copper
Yeah, I'm really good at being the only one without magic and being forgotten by the folk. Best in the whole party.
Amber
Well, I think you did some great magic in there.
Silver
Yeah, and you're the one keeping the car running.
Copper
That doesn't count.
Glass
I don't know about y'all, but I want to wait until tomorrow to worry about getting worse.
Amber
Water? Yeah, I've got the keys.
Glass
Quicker we get out of here, the better.
Amber
Really was great food, though.
Silver
It sure was.
Amber
Oh, hell, I'm starving.
Copper
Yep.
Anna McGuire
Hymns for the Road is a podcast written and Produced by Anna McGuire, starring Maurice Thomas as Silver, Pao Pong and Ebon as Glass, Grizz Siebenek as Amber, Tabitha Bardal as Copper, and featuring Emily Folger as the waiter. Original music by Joshua David Mitchell. Additional music is today's Journal by Ciro. This episode's hymn is American pie by Don McLean. Sign up for our newsletter at hodgepodgeaudio.com or support our work on Patreon.com hodgepodgeaudio Thank you for listening.
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Copper
I chose french fries. Over loaded french fries, I asked Stuart from accounting about his weekend.
Waiter
Even though I don't care, I updated.
Amber
My operating system without having to call tech support.
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Glass
Ch.
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Ch. Ch.
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Release Date: November 8, 2024
Host/Author: Hodgepodge Audio
Hymn Featured: "American Pie" by Don McLean
In Episode 10 of "Hymns for the Road," titled "The Diner," listeners are immersed in the perilous yet enchanting post-apocalyptic landscape of what was once America. The story centers around four survivors—Silver, Glass, Amber, and Copper—as they navigate through a fantasy wasteland teeming with otherworldly creatures and surreal challenges. This episode delves into their encounter with a seemingly ordinary diner that harbors mysterious undertones.
The journey begins with the group discussing their immediate needs:
Their conversation reveals the scarcity of resources and the strain of survival in this transformed world. The decision to seek out a diner arises from their hunger and need for water, despite initial reservations about potential dangers.
Upon spotting a dilapidated billboard declaring "Open All Night" (02:50), the group decides to investigate:
This contrasting perspective highlights the group's differing outlooks on their environment. As they enter, the diner exudes a heavy grease smell and an eerie stillness, with patrons appearing too content and unchanging.
The waiter greets them warmly, but there's an underlying sense of unease:
As they peruse the menu, multiple red flags emerge:
The ambiance becomes more unnerving when Copper observes:
The outside view reveals an "ink black void"—a stark contrast to the bustling interior, raising suspicions about the diner's true nature.
As the group contemplates leaving, the surreal nature of the diner becomes undeniable. Plates are manipulated, and patrons remain motionless. Amber takes a pivotal role in resolving the tension:
In a moment of desperation and creativity, Amber sings "American Pie," invoking magical intervention to break the spell:
This act not only frees them from the eerie hold of the diner but also underscores Amber's unique magical abilities that prove crucial for their survival.
Throughout the episode, the interactions among the survivors reveal their personalities and evolving relationships:
Copper often exhibits skepticism and caution:
Amber balances concern with practical needs:
Glass serves as a mediator, ensuring group cohesion:
Silver remains focused on immediate concerns like hunger:
The episode highlights their reliance on each other's strengths and the challenges they face in maintaining trust and cooperation in a hostile environment.
Perception vs. Reality: The seemingly inviting diner hides a sinister reality, illustrating the theme that not everything is as it appears in the post-apocalyptic world.
Resource Scarcity: The group's constant struggle for necessities like water and food emphasizes the harshness of their environment.
Magic and Survival: Amber's magical intervention showcases the blend of fantasy elements with survival instincts, adding depth to the narrative.
Isolation and Community: The static patrons of the diner contrast the protagonists' desire to move forward, highlighting themes of isolation and the longing for community in a desolate world.
Episode 10, "The Diner," masterfully combines tension, supernatural elements, and character development to create a compelling narrative within the "Hymns for the Road" series. The group's encounter with the enigmatic diner serves as a microcosm of their broader journey, testing their resolve, unity, and adaptability in an unforgiving landscape. Amber's pivotal role in overcoming the diner’s enchantment not only advances the plot but also deepens our understanding of her character's unique abilities and importance to the group's survival.
Listeners are left eagerly anticipating the next chapter in this captivating tale of resilience and magic amidst the remnants of a fallen America.
Cast:
Music:
Production:
Note: This summary excludes advertisements, intros, outros, and non-content sections to focus solely on the narrative and its key elements.