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Anna McGuire
Hymns for the Road is a fiction podcast that often takes place inside a moving vehicle. Listener discretion is advised while driving. General content warnings are listed in the show notes.
Copper
Sure has been a while.
Glass
We'll find it, Copper. Don't worry too much.
Copper
What if it's not in the same place this year?
Silver
It's never in the same place, but we'll get there.
Copper
I don't mean the Cornfield Silver.
Amber
It doesn't move, Copper. It'll be in the same spot it always is.
Silver
We'll get to it. We always do.
Copper
We always found our dagger. Some years it took longer than others, but we hadn't missed it yet. I don't remember how we knew what we were looking for, but it was always the same knife and always in the same place. It was only a matter of getting to that place and getting back out.
Glass
So, anybody want to hear a joke? Amber? Silver? Lighten the mood a little bit?
Amber
No.
Silver
I'm game for a joke.
Glass
Okay. Okay. So a dog walks into a bar. They should have kept their eyes open.
Amber
I don't get it.
Glass
Get it? The dog walked into a bar because their eyes were closed. Huh?
Silver
Huh?
Copper
Not your best work, Glass.
Glass
I didn't think so. Though.
Amber
If you can keep that up all night, I'll buy something worth a pint of blood for you at the next Winter House gas station.
Glass
Tempting.
Silver
You shouldn't joke about that.
Glass
Should I tell my dog joke again instead?
Amber
No.
Silver
Everybody remember the rules for tonight.
Amber
Don't talk to them unless they talk to you.
Glass
And only say what you have to.
Silver
That's the biggest one.
Copper
Don't look them in the eyes.
Glass
Don't take your mask off.
Amber
No singing once we're past the walls.
Silver
We've done this enough times. You think?
Glass
Obviously getting a little sharp, Amber.
Amber
Sorry. I'm just excited.
Copper
You're excited?
Amber
I like Halloween.
Glass
Well, I don't relate to that at all.
Copper
Maybe we could read some cards, pass the time.
Glass
I'm not getting anything from them right now. It's just Regular art.
Copper
What if we just made up our own card reading?
Glass
All right. Sure. You want to go first? And I'll never get used to that.
Silver
Well, here we are, y'all.
Amber
And there it is.
Copper
We couldn't see it up ahead. You never could. We were driving through a pine forest. Dry needles strewn out all over the narrow street. And suddenly we were shooting out into the field. The spontaneous tree line at our backs. The cornfield. It was a world all on its own. One we could only get into on Halloween night. I don't know if you could reach it outside of a car, but it was endless. A sea of yellowing corn stalks. Not a speck of fruit on them as far as the eye could see. Eventually the trees would disappear. We couldn't get back to them either. Not until morning. The sky was purple and black and red. The moon orange and unfathomably enormous. Like it was hovering just above us, watching. You see the town?
Amber
I think so. Look over there.
Glass
Where?
Amber
Over this way.
Glass
I think you're right.
Silver
Anything on the cards? Now, Glads.
Glass
I think my cards might be drunk, actually.
Amber
What?
Glass
Well, they're just showing me really blurry close ups of random objects. I don't know what this is supposed to mean.
Amber
What? Let me see.
Glass
Sure. Here.
Copper
Oh, right.
Amber
I forgot.
Copper
I can't see.
Glass
I forgot you can't see them.
Silver
Well, gonna find somewhere to park. Everybody get your costumes on.
Copper
Legend has it that the moss grows on the north side of the trees. Well, legend has it when the rain comes down, all the worms come up to breathe.
Silver
Well, legend has it that some bees come, all the plants they even with the leaves.
Glass
Legend has it that the world spins around on an axis of 23 degrees. But have you heard the story of the rabbit in the moon?
Copper
Or the cattle? She left the mountains while out in the cornfield there was a village. A hundred little box buildings stacked on top of each other. The exteriors were black and the windows lit up orange, gold. But this wasn't the somewhere better. It was the Halloween town. And it stayed at a distance no matter how fast you drove. It floated on the horizon like a mirage. And you could hear the noise if you opened the windows. But you could never get any closer. Cars weren't welcome there. Humans were though. And if you wanted to get in, you had to get out and walk.
Silver
Everybody feeling alright?
Copper
No.
Amber
I don't know what you're talking about. I'm feeling great.
Glass
Somehow I feel way worse than last year.
Amber
You should have thought of that before you developed magic. I'm immune to the bad vibes.
Silver
If you got any singing left in your system, get it out now before we get to the gate.
Amber
Nope. I feel great.
Silver
All right, y'all. Everybody costumed up?
Amber
Yep.
Copper
I'm gonna bring a spell, just in case.
Amber
Which one?
Copper
Fire. Just a small one.
Glass
What are you planning on setting on fire?
Copper
I'm not gonna set anything on fire. I just thought it might be a good distraction. Or a light. It's not even that big.
Silver
Focus, y'all. We get in, get the dagger and get out. Then we're home free until the solstice. Here we go.
Copper
It never took long to get there. We couldn't have walked more than a half mile on any given year. But the space seemed so much wider than that. I looked back toward our car. After only a few minutes of walking, even jumping high enough to see over the corn stalks. I could barely see the road. Like we'd been walking for hours.
Glass
Should we tie ourselves together now, or do we wait until we get closer?
Silver
Go ahead, Glass. Now's as good a time. As any.
Glass
Here, Amber, you're next.
Amber
Got it? You got it, Copper?
Copper
Yes.
Amber
You sure you don't need help with the knot?
Copper
I can do the knot just fine.
Silver
We gotta hurry, y'all. Night's already half over.
Amber
Come listen, all ye fair maids to.
Copper
How the moral goes Nobody knew and nobody knows how the pebble was robbed.
Glass
Of his twice five toes or how.
Amber
The dawn came to own illumino snows.
Silver
Or how the junglers went to sea.
Copper
And she bet they roll and came.
Silver
To shore by the chainly bore Where.
Copper
B tre Silver was right. The night was already half over. But it was hard to tell how late it actually was, considering the brightness. The whole world was bathed in orange light from that enormous moon. It had the strange quality of lighting everything up only halfway. It tricked your brain into thinking you could see perfectly. But every object cast a shadow that looked a bit too much like it was moving on its own. And after only a few more minutes, we arrived under the wrought iron arch. The gateway into town. We're here.
Silver
Mask on, y'all.
Glass
Sooner we get in, the sooner we can get out.
Amber
Don't stay past sunrise.
Glass
You know, that would be a lot easier if there were any indication of what time it is.
Copper
The moon moves. You just have to watch it closely.
Silver
Lead the way, Glass.
Copper
If you wore a mask, the folk couldn't tell you were human. Everybody's a monster in there. We weren't the only humans, either. Lots of people come here to get their own solstice. Items for their own places. Not that I could tell who was human. The party couldn't even tell each other apart. That's why we were tied together as we passed under the gate. My friends distorted in front of my eyes. I knew it was an illusion and one that would dissipate if any of us lost our masks. But it always made my heart drop to see them all replaced by things large, impossibly shaped. Far from human things.
Amber
Let's find our haunted house.
Glass
Is that Amber?
Amber
Yep.
Glass
Jeez, I can't even look directly at you. Makes my head hurt.
Silver
Speech to a minimum, y'all.
Copper
Sounds like somebody took their mask off.
Amber
Not the first one either. Look over there.
Copper
Is that a body?
Amber
What else could it be?
Copper
They don't usually just let them line the street like that, though.
Glass
Who knows? Strange rules will never understand.
Copper
Guys.
Silver
Yeah.
Copper
That was the first time I saw them. Just a ways away from the body. A figure standing about 100ft behind us. A human shaped figure. The most human I could see at all. The folk don't usually bother with looking human here. But this one was just standing there. In plain black clothes and a stark white mask of a goat's head. I thought it was an illusion or my imagination. Because I looked away for a moment and they were gone. Um. Nothing. I'm just, you know.
Silver
Yeah, darling, we know.
Copper
Good evening.
Glass
Good evening to you as well.
Silver
Little small, aren't we?
Glass
Hey? I just like squeezing into small spaces this time of year.
Silver
Some of them are awfully difficult to climb into, I will admit.
Glass
Enjoy the evening. Well, that was something.
Copper
Let's just keep going. What we were looking for, what we had to find every year, was inside one of the buildings. We knew from experience that they would stay standing when you went inside. Even the ones that seemed barely held upright by posts and wires. The folk didn't hold back in the Halloween town. They'd eat you if they caught you. Or worse. The winters liked to pull you apart and hang up the pieces of you from the roofs. Sometimes the pieces were still alive. The summers like to trick you into staying past sunrise when the gate into the cornfield would close and you would have to wait another year to get back out. I don't think anybody ever made it that long.
Silver
Anybody care to do the honor?
Anna McGuire
Me.
Amber
I want to do it.
Copper
You're a freak camper.
Amber
Better than being terrified. Here we go. Ding dong.
Copper
Let's hurry.
Glass
Excuse me. Excuse me.
Silver
Where's your mask, darling?
Copper
I fell.
Glass
I, I, I'm sorry.
Copper
I'm sorry. Where did it go?
Glass
Where did what?
Copper
The human. Where did it go?
Glass
That way.
Copper
The folk vanished into a crack in the floor. No doubt they'd catch up to that poor bastard soon. Whatever solstice item they were looking for, they wouldn't need it now. I could see out the thin window by the door, but I couldn't see which way they went. I couldn't tell if Glass had lied, but what I could see was the figure in the goat mask standing still in the shifting crowd. Blank wooden eyes staring right at me. We'd better hurry. Yip.
Glass
Yip.
Copper
Yip. We climbed through the house at smelled like burnt sugar and smoke. The stale dustiness of autumn air, and just the faintest metal tang of blood. I didn't remember what normal fall looked like before everything. Silver said a lot of things were similar. The stairwell was narrow, so narrow we couldn't have walked to across. And at our regular sizes at that. But I suppose the things in here don't really pay attention to the bounds of space and time. I think those are more like abstract concepts to them.
Amber
There's the room.
Copper
Yes. Guys, slow down.
Silver
Where's the dagger?
Glass
Maybe it fell off. We can look for it.
Copper
It was right here.
Amber
Glass, look. There's still an indent on the pillow.
Copper
It's always right here. Where did it go?
Glass
Chill out, Copper. We'll find it.
Silver
No.
Glass
What?
Silver
No. We need to go. We'll figure something else out.
Amber
What? We need that knife, Silver. We're screwed if we don't have it.
Silver
Listen, every human here looking for their own thing had to find out about theirs somehow. We'll find out about a new one.
Glass
Silver. We're not gonna make it through winter without it.
Silver
Glass. Somebody's trying to make sure we stay here and look for it. Somebody's trying to keep us from getting back out on time. We need to go.
Copper
Huh?
Amber
There's another dead body in the corner.
Glass
There's lots of dead bodies, Sam.
Amber
No, a whole intact body like the one we saw on the street. Look at this. It looks like they've just been stabbed.
Silver
Sure does. Same thing will happen to us if we don't.
Amber
Silver, it's Halloween. Since when does a folk just stab someone and leave them? They never do stuff that simple. The agony is the whole point tonight.
Copper
Their mask is still on.
Glass
Somebody can see through the masks.
Silver
We got to go. Come on.
Copper
The goat figure was behind the house, looking up through the window.
Amber
Come on, Copper.
Glass
Hurry.
Copper
Y'all. Hurry. Hurry. You're going too fast. Wait.
Glass
Guys, come on.
Copper
Tonight. It's coming loose. Something ran into Me. And I was on the ground. I stood up as quickly as I could, making sure my mask was secure on my face. Wait. My party disappeared into the crowd. Wait. I was alone, surrounded by creatures. Maybe people. Most likely not. I couldn't even look for them. The shifting forms and barely decipherable illusions meant that I wouldn't even recognize my friends if I saw them. As I looked for anything familiar, I stumbled back, clutching the slash across my arm. The pain rang through my nerves like an electric shock. Blood slid out between my fingers and behind me, the figure in the goat mask. I ran. I passed another body, stab wound in the chest, bleeding into the street. But I knew the way I came. I knew where the gate was. What? What? But it was here. It was right here. Or maybe I didn't. Where is it? I suppose it was my own fault. It's arrogance to think you would know where anything is in this world. So I ran. I ran until I couldn't. Until I met with a smooth stone wall almost 20ft high. No. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. I was bleeding, and I didn't have much to stop it. They would be able to smell it soon. Fresh blood. They'd be on me like a swarm of wasps. I knew it was going to hurt, but fire was the only spell I had. Okay. Okay, here we go. Here we go. One, two. I knew how to cauterize a wound properly. Silver taught me. This is not the right way to do it, but a little melted skin is better than being torn apart. But even after replacing the smell of blood with a smell of burnt flesh, I wasn't safe. I hadn't escaped. The person in the goat mask. You. Why aren't you joining the party? You're. You're being awfully rude right now. You know, they drew something out from the waistband of their pants. A knife. Hey, that's our knife. Our sacrificial dagger. The one we needed for the winter solstice ritual. The one we wouldn't survive without. Blood dripping red from the ragged tip of it, they lunged. The other person swung at me, missed, and I kicked their leg out from under them. I had a moment. I could wrench the knife away from them and run, try to make it to the gate on my own. But I didn't. That's mine. I don't know what happened to me. Of course, there are places that bend the way you think on Halloween. In this place, even otherwise, benevolent folk can become bloodthirsty monsters. I suppose, on some level, it could Happen to humans too. I needed that knife. My friends needed that knife. They might die without it. This person might kill them by keeping it. Folk didn't even need knives. This one was just doing it for fun. Give it to me. I suppose I didn't mean to take the mask off. Or maybe I did. But as I wrenched the dagger from their hand, my elbow pushed the goat head off their face. What? They were human. Just as human as me.
Amber
Ooh.
Copper
Did you find one?
Glass
I spy a human.
Copper
It was an accident.
Glass
I get the first pick.
Copper
The knife was hole in my hand. But it pulsed, sending a thick bassy thump up through my arm, beating through my chest. A folk nearby, a long spindly thing with too many stick like legs, had a heartbeat. I could feel it. But folk didn't have heartbeats. Humans did.
Glass
How long do we wait?
Silver
They'll find us.
Amber
Can you tell how much time we have left?
Silver
I said they'll find us.
Amber
But what if they don't?
Silver
I'm not leaving them behind them.
Amber
We should go back in. We should go back in and find them.
Copper
Thank all you're tied together.
Glass
It's part of us. We wouldn't last long without it. Yeah, it's.
Copper
You're. Oh, I forgot.
Glass
Well, you're having a good Halloween, I assume.
Copper
Guys, it's me.
Glass
Hey, it's you.
Copper
Oh. A dog walks into a bar.
Silver
Beg your pardon?
Copper
Never mind. I think I mistook you for someone else.
Glass
Ah. He should have kept his eyes open. Yes.
Silver
Grab that rope, Copper. We gotta go pick up the knife.
Amber
Great move.
Copper
We sprinted to the gate, our Decker pulsing in my hand. And behind me, above the shouting and laughter and crows. I thought I could still hear the goat person screaming as they ripped them to pieces.
Amber
It's been a pretty long time.
Glass
We got back. Moving again. Amber. We'll get out.
Silver
If we were stuck, we'd still be in the town. Stop touching it, sweetheart. Going to make it worse.
Copper
Sorry.
Amber
Sorry. Why are you.
Glass
Don't apologize. You'll just die.
Silver
Look at me. Are you all right?
Copper
Yeah, it just. Just hurts.
Silver
That's not what I meant.
Copper
It was a human. What was the one stabbing all the people? It was a human. They were using our knife to detect other humans.
Silver
This was the one that came at you. Come here. Once we're out of here, we'll find something better to put on your burn and we'll wrap it up nicer. We'll find somewhere quiet to park and you can get some rest. When the sun comes up, it's over. You made it.
Amber
Glad you got out of there safe. Cop.
Glass
I don't want to sound like I'm happy about any of this, but you did kind of save our heights for the solstice.
Amber
Yeah, you got our knife. We'd be screwed if it weren't for you.
Silver
You did good. I'm real proud of.
Copper
Thanks, guys.
Silver
We already wrapped that knife up, right?
Glass
Yep. It's back in its towel prison until the solstice.
Amber
Good. That thing creeps me out.
Glass
Hey. And we're out.
Copper
We made it.
Glass
Ha. You see? It's just like I said. I don't know what everybody was so worried about.
Amber
When we pull over for Copper's medical stuff, I'm getting something pumpkin flavored. And I don't care how much it costs.
Silver
All right by me.
Amber
We might as well do something fun.
Glass
So how about it, Copper? Wanna get some consolation snacks before our 12 hour nap?
Copper
Pumpkin?
Silver
There they are.
Amber
Happy Halloween, everybody.
Glass
Happy Halloween.
Anna McGuire
Hymns for the Road is a podcast written and Produced by Anna McGuire. Starring Maurice Thomas as Silver, Pau Pananibon as Glass, Grizz Siebenek as Amber, Tabitha Bardal as Copper, and featuring Zayn Schacht as the goat person and Ray O'Hare, Tariq Esau, Autumn Toller, Vincent Holmes, Justice Washington and Anna McGuire as the folk. Original music by Joshua David Mitchell. This episode's hymn is the Moss by Cosmo Sheldrake. Sign up for our newsletter@hodgepodgeaudio.com or support our work on Patreon.com findasalive Thank you for listening and Happy Halloween.
Ryan Seacrest
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Copper
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Hymns for the Road – Episode 9: Halloween
Release Date: October 31, 2024
Host/Author: Hodgepodge Audio
Introduction
In Episode 9 of Hymns for the Road titled "Halloween," listeners are plunged into a chilling yet enchanting narrative set against the backdrop of a magical apocalypse. The story follows four survivors—Copper, Glass, Silver, and Amber—as they undertake an annual quest to retrieve a sacred dagger essential for their survival through the harsh winter solstice. This episode intricately weaves themes of camaraderie, fear, and the supernatural, all while exploring the hauntingly beautiful landscapes of a transformed America.
Setting the Scene
The episode opens with the survivors navigating through a desolate pine forest, transitioning into an expansive cornfield that only reveals itself on Halloween night. The world around them is depicted as both "indescribably beautiful, and ruthlessly, indiscriminately deadly", setting a tone of eerie beauty and constant peril.
Notable Quote:
Copper reflects on their mission:
"We always found our dagger...it was always the same knife and always in the same place."
[01:41]
The Quest for the Dagger
As the group prepares for their journey, Silver reiterates the strict rules essential for their survival:
Notable Quote:
Silver emphasizes the importance of silence:
"And only say what you have to. That's the biggest one."
[02:56]
Amber expresses her excitement for Halloween, contrasting with Glass's detachment, highlighting the diverse personalities within the group.
Notable Quote:
Amber shares her enthusiasm:
"I like Halloween."
[03:15]
Entering Halloween Town
Upon arriving at the cornfield's edge, the survivors describe the surreal landscape:
Notable Description:
"A sea of yellowing corn stalks. Not a speck of fruit on them as far as the eye could see. The sky was purple and black and red. The moon orange and unfathomably enormous."
[03:45 – 04:46]
They encounter the goat-masked folk, eerie inhabitants of Halloween Town who enforce their own set of ominous rules. The gateway into the town is marked by a wrought iron arch, symbolizing the threshold between their perilous quest and the enigmatic town.
Notable Quote:
Copper warns about their situation:
"The whole world was bathed in orange light from that enormous moon. It had the strange quality of lighting everything up only halfway... some places bend the way you think on Halloween."
[10:42 – 11:36]
Confrontation and Revelation
Inside Halloween Town, the group splits up to search for the dagger. Tensions rise as they navigate the haunted house filled with unsettling sights and sounds:
Notable Incident:
Amber bravely takes the lead in searching:
"I want to do it. Ding dong."
[14:25]
Copper accidentally removes his mask during a confrontation, revealing his vulnerability. This act breaks the illusion that masks provide, leading to dire consequences as the folk reveal their monstrous nature.
Notable Quote:
Copper narrates the betrayal:
"I ran until I couldn't. Until I met with a smooth stone wall almost 20ft high... They drew something out from the waistband of their pants. A knife. Hey, that's our knife."
[18:27 – 23:19]
The revelation that the knife is a tool to detect humans adds depth to the folklore surrounding Halloween Town, illustrating the intertwining of magic and survival.
Resolution and Escape
Despite the chaos and near-fatal encounters, the survivors manage to reclaim the dagger. Copper's quick thinking and sacrifice—using a fire spell to cauterize his wound—ensure their escape as dawn breaks:
Notable Quote:
Silver comforts Copper after the ordeal:
"Once we're out of here, we'll find something better to put on your burn and we'll wrap it up nicer... When the sun comes up, it's over. You made it."
[26:18 – 26:43]
The group's bond is reaffirmed as they reflect on their successful retrieval of the dagger, underscoring themes of trust and teamwork.
Conclusion and Reflections
The episode concludes with the survivors expressing relief and a return to normalcy as they leave Halloween Town. Amber's light-hearted comment about getting pumpkin-flavored treats adds a touch of levity after the intense journey.
Notable Quote:
Amber wraps up with a festive note:
"Happy Halloween, everybody."
[27:38 – 27:40]
Notable Quotes Recap
Copper on their mission consistency:
"We always found our dagger...it was always the same knife and always in the same place."
[01:41]
Silver on the importance of rules:
"And only say what you have to. That's the biggest one."
[02:56]
Amber's excitement:
"I like Halloween."
[03:15]
Copper on the surreal environment:
"The whole world was bathed in orange light from that enormous moon..."
[10:42]
Copper's confrontation narrative:
"I ran until I couldn't... They drew something out from the waistband of their pants. A knife..."
[18:27 – 23:19]
Silver comforting Copper:
"When the sun comes up, it's over. You made it."
[26:18 – 26:43]
Amber's festive sign-off:
"Happy Halloween, everybody."
[27:38 – 27:40]
Final Thoughts
Episode 9 of Hymns for the Road masterfully blends horror and fantasy, delivering a suspenseful and emotionally charged narrative. Through its vivid descriptions and character-driven plot, the episode captures the essence of Halloween's haunting allure while exploring the lengths to which individuals will go to ensure their survival. Listeners are left eagerly anticipating the next installment of this captivating journey through a magical apocalypse.