Podcast Summary: I Have ADHD Podcast

Episode 348: Too Bored to Function – Why ADHD Brains Would Rather Do Anything Than Be Bored
Host: Kristen Carder
Guest: Dr. Marcie Caldwell
Date: November 4, 2025

Main Theme & Purpose

This episode features a deep dive into the neuroscience, lived experience, and practical management of boredom in adults with ADHD. Host Kristen Carder and psychologist Dr. Marcie Caldwell unpack why boredom is excruciating for people with ADHD, how it manifests emotionally and physically, and offer evidence-based strategies to manage and work with this challenge. The episode aims to validate listeners’ experiences, clarify the underlying neurobiology, and provide concrete tools to navigate boredom in daily life.

Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Validation: Boredom is a Real ADHD Struggle

• People with ADHD are truly more prone to boredom compared to neurotypicals, and the severity of ADHD exacerbates this tendency.

  • Quote:

    “People with ADHD are much more likely, much more prone to boredom… The more severe the ADHD, the more boredom prone your brain is going to be.”
    – Dr. Caldwell (06:41)

• The daily mundane tasks that don’t bother neurotypicals can feel insurmountable for ADHDers, zapping energy, executive functioning, and joy.

  • Quote:

    “For me, it’s like…the mundane things of life that everyone just accepts…these are the things that steal my energy. They steal my executive functioning. I can’t function…”
    – Kristen (07:25)

• Validation is essential: Accepting that this is a neurological truth, not a character flaw, is the first step.

  • Quote:

    “This is actual neurobiology. This is how this particular brain is made… we need to understand that before we can build systems that work for it.”
    – Dr. Caldwell (09:24)

2. Types of Boredom in ADHD (12:01)

• Apathetic Boredom:

  • Low energy, “blah” feeling—common in inattentive subtype.
  • Example: Laying on the couch, unable to engage in anything.

• Agitated Boredom:

  • High energy, restless, trapped, often with physical agitation—more common in hyperactive/impulsive subtype.
  • Example: Being trapped in a meeting, watching the clock, a “buzz” of needing out.

• Combined Type = Both!

  • Most people can experience both, but certain subtypes are more predisposed.

• Relatable Illustration:

  • Kristen describes feeling agitated and trapped as a stay-at-home mom, despite choosing and valuing the role, because of the lack of adult-level stimulation.

    “…nothing was really stimulating in a way that engaged my brain…constantly agitated because nothing was really stimulating…”
    (14:03)

3. The “Optimal Stimulation Zone” (18:14)

• Both neurotypical and ADHD brains have a window for ideal engagement; for ADHDers, it’s a much narrower, harder-to-hit “tightrope.”
  • ADHDers feel understimulated much of the time and quickly become overwhelmed with too much input.
  • Explains why ADHDers thrive in high-stimulation careers (ER, chef, entrepreneur, deadline-driven roles).

    “There’s a need for this right now, to be your best.”
    – Dr. Caldwell (23:34)

4. Why Delay Feels So Painful (24:25)

• Delay Aversion: ADHD brains are less able to tolerate delay—immediate rewards are heavily preferred, and waiting feels physically and emotionally distressing.

  • Classic Example:

    “I give you $5 now, or in six months I’ll mail you $7.”
    – Dr. Caldwell (25:00)
    “No, I’m good. I’ll take the five.”
    – Kristen

  • The discomfort of waiting (“the stress response system is activated”) is real and measurable.

    “There is actual physiological and emotional discomfort that is coursing through your body as you’re making this kind of decision.”
    – Dr. Caldwell (26:41)

• Implications: Delaying gratification is not a trivial matter for ADHDers, which makes future-oriented behaviors hard (saving money, working out, planning ahead).

• ADHD time perception: Present rewards feel heavier—like a scale already weighted toward NOW.

5. Strategies to Amplify Future Rewards (30:08)

• Visualization and Data:

  • Make the future more tangible—define and visualize future rewards.
  • Gathering data about how you feel after positive behaviors (am I glad I did that workout?) can help.

  “It’s a way of bringing that future to the present…creating a relationship with your future self.”
  – Kristen & Dr. Caldwell (31:40)

6. Boredom and the Stress Response (40:00)

• The ADHD brain doesn’t lack dopamine, but it can’t use it effectively (dopamine diffusion difference).

• Understimulation is perceived as a threat by the brain, triggering stress hormones (especially cortisol) and making boredom feel physically “like torture.”

  “…that chronic level of understimulation is experienced as a threat to the body and to the brain. It actually triggers our alarm centers …[and] feels bad…”
  – Dr. Caldwell (40:00)

• This growing stress can push ADHDers from agitated boredom to “apathetic,” or a state of total shutdown.

7. Default Mode Network & Ongoing Distraction (47:53, 50:23)

• Default Mode Network (DMN): When not task-engaged, the ADHD DMN (self-reflection, emotion, memory) doesn't “turn off” even during active tasks—"recess" is always happening in the background.

• Makes task focus akin to “teaching math class in the middle of a playground.”

  “For an ADHD brain, that default mode network doesn’t really turn off…recess is still going.”
  – Dr. Caldwell (50:23)

• Results in increased emotional experience and exhaustion after even simple tasks.

8. Practical Strategies for Managing Boredom (54:45)

a) Acceptance First:

• Start by accepting this as a real feature of your brain, not a personal failing.

b) Outsource and Eliminate Where Possible:

• Don’t be afraid to use resources (laundry service, bartering tasks, trading within relationships) to reduce “boring torture” tasks.

c) Gamification and Engagement-Building:

• Increase engagement with tasks, not by taking breaks (Pomodoro doesn’t work well for ADHD), but by making the task itself more interesting:
  • Turn chores into games, races, or challenges.
  • Example: Count how many times a boring coworker repeats themselves; time dishwashing.

“Research shows that breaks don’t work [for ADHD]…what seems to be more effective for boredom is trying to increase engagement.”
– Dr. Caldwell (56:12, 57:33)

d) Cognitive and Sensory Stimulation:

• Try doing work while moving (walking treadmill for writing).
• Leverage physical activity to raise stimulation and help focus.

e) Regulatory “Core Six” for ADHD Resilience (61:39):

1. Sleep (most important foundational element)
2. Exercise (acts similarly to medication)
3. Nutrition (steady blood sugar)
4. Medication
5. Meditation
6. Social Connection

“If you have more to spend, then you can call the kids off the swings and back to math class. If you go in exhausted and not having eaten...you’re going to be screaming at the kids on the swings within a minute.”
– Dr. Caldwell (61:11)

f) Remove Judgment and Practice Self-Compassion:

• Reducing “layered suffering” means not fighting reality (“this shouldn’t be so hard”), but instead working from what truly is.

Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• “Everyone with ADHD knows what to do to improve their lives…but ADHD is not a disorder of not knowing what to do, it’s a disorder of knowing exactly what to do but not being able to get yourself to do it.”
  – Kristen (16:19)

• “Boredom doesn’t sound like a huge emotion…but for someone with ADHD, it actually is a really visceral experience.”
  – Kristen (39:33)

• “So we are in this place that’s extra activated with this alarm center that’s extra activated. And the thing that’s supposed to come in and say like, oh no, no, it’s okay, chill out. That’s off.”
  – Dr. Caldwell (52:31)

• “It feels like torture…It is physically painful. It’s emotionally painful.”
  – Dr. Caldwell (52:58)

• “What can we get off the plate? What can we just stop feeling butchered by?”
  – Dr. Caldwell (55:04)

Important Timestamps

• Boredom proneness research: 06:41–09:00
• Types of boredom: 12:01–15:40
• Optimal stimulation zone illustrated: 18:14–24:08
• Delay aversion/dopamine and decision making: 24:25–31:53
• Coping with boredom and stress response: 40:00–45:27
• Default mode network explained: 47:53–52:58
• Strategies to manage boredom & ADHD regulatory needs: 54:45–62:27

Tone and Style

Conversational, validating, infused with humor and real-life anecdotes. The discussion is highly relatable, compassionate, and practical, with scientific concepts explained in plain language.

Summary Takeaways

• Boredom is not a trivial frustration for people with ADHD—it is a neurologically-rooted, physically painful challenge that can affect every area of life.
• ADHD brains have a “narrow tightrope” of optimal stimulation and are both easily bored and quickly overwhelmed, leading to cycles of agitation and shutdown.
• Practical management involves removing as many “torture” tasks as possible, increasing engagement in remaining tasks by gamifying or stimulating them, and rigorously focusing on six regulatory pillars (sleep, exercise, nutrition, medication, meditation, connection).
• Self-acceptance and self-compassion are essential—boredom’s impact is real and managing it is a skill, not a moral failing.

For listeners with ADHD: You’re not lazy, broken, or weak—your brain is genuinely “too bored to function” at times. Understanding this is your first step to thriving.