Transcript
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This episode is sponsored by Batch. If your sleep has been feeling not quite right, like you're getting through the night but not actually waking up rested, you're certainly not alone. And that kind of low level exhaustion can affect everything, including your ADHD symptoms. That's why I've been really interested in Batch. Batch is a hemp wellness company founded by chemical engineers, which means their products are built on real formulation and full lab transparency, not just wellness trends. Their Micro Mints are designed for daily use, a simple, fast absorbing way to support calm and mood throughout the day and for nighttime. Their CBD gummies are formulated specifically for more restorative sleep, the kind that actually helps you feel human again the next day. They also offer THC gummies with carefully balanced blends so you can choose an experience that feels right for you. What stands out to me is how intentional everything is. It's not about extremes, it's about balance. Right now, batch is offering 30% off site wide including subscriptions. Go to hellobatch.com ihaveadhd and use code ihaveadhd at checkout. Hey what's up? This is Kristen Carter and you are
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listening to a bite size episode of
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the I have ADHD podcast. I am medicated, caffeinated, regulated and ready to roll.
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This little episode is one of my
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favorite clips from the podcast.
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It's perfect if you're not in the mood for a full hour long listen because let's be real, some of us ADHDers just don't have the patience for all of that.
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But if you are a die hard listener, think of this as your mid week pick me up.
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It's Thursday y'.
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All. Friday is right around the corner. If you love this clip, check out
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the show notes for a link to the full episode. And remember my friend, drink your water, take your meds, grab a snack. Now let's get rolling. I've got a pretty heavy hitting episode for you. We're gonna talk about the signs of a dysfunctional family and why this is so common with people who come from ADHD families. And this is part of a two part series. This is part one. Next week we're gonna talk about what is enough family look like and how can we get there? But today, we're going to deep dive into naming exactly what dysfunction looks like. And this is gonna be really, really important because so many of us ADHDers come from a dysfunctional family, and we want to change the pattern. We wanna break the cycle. But how, How. How in the world do we do that? And we start. We start by naming what is true. We start by living in reality. We start by recognizing what dysfunction looks like. And that's what this episode is about. Today, I have a. Just, like, a feeling in my spirit, in my gut that this episode is going to be foundational, monumental, pivotal. All of the words, like, very, very important for our community. So I. I just. I recommend that you. You listen to it. And if it's kind of emotionally heavy for you, that's okay for you to press pause, take a break, regulate, get into nature, come back to it. But this is an episode that has the potential to impact generations. This is an episode that has the potential to reframe and rewire your immediate family, your dynamics with your partner, your kids, the generations that come after you. And so it was really important to me that we have this conversation. And I've got to tell you that the last couple weeks have been so tough for me. So emotionally heavy. There's a lot of extended family drama happening. It's distracting. It's overwhelming in a massive way. It's taking a lot of my brain power. I've got, like, muscle tension out the wazoo. I don't know if that's, like, a phrase that we can still use, but, like, so much back pain, neck pain, jaw pain, headaches. All of this coming from the, like, ripple effect of dysfunction in my family. And do you know how I combat it? This is how Kristen Carter combats it. She talks about it. She gonna talk about it. I'm gonna talk about it. I'm gonna name it. I'm gonna bring it to the light. Not my own drama, necessarily, but just what does dysfunction look like in general? Okay. And my family's legacy, to be honest, it's quite dysfunctional. As you know, I'm writing a book to help ADHD people have healthier, more connected relationships. And I want you to know that I come by this work honestly. I come by this work very honestly. I was recently at a doctor's appointment where we were reviewing my family. It was so uncomfortable. They, like, printed out this graphic of my family tree, both sides of my extended family. You know, grandparents, aunts, uncles, cousins. Then, of course, my own parents and my siblings and Me. And as I looked at the family tree, I started doing the trauma math, or maybe we could call it like dysfunction math. I was looking at it and I was like, oh, these people over here, they were abused, they were sexually abused. These people over here were verbally and physically abused. All of these people right here, they had unaddressed mental health issues. These people here are alcoholics. It's just like it was very, I don't know, it was an uncomfortable experience, but it was a very like mind blowing experience to look at the family tree and notice the abuse, neglect and dysfunction that's all over my own family tree. And I refuse to despise my lineage. I will not do that. But I also refuse to perpetuate the cycle. I won't continue this pattern. It's gonna stop with me. And so today we're talking about dysfunctional families and adhd, because I know that mine is not the only family that is riddled with trauma, neglect, abuse and dysfunctional patterns. At the very least, as discussed last week or a couple weeks ago with Lindsay Gibson, emotional immaturity is ever present in ADHD families. And I'm telling you, we've got to make a change. I'm begging you. We've got to do it differently than the generations before us. We just have to. Or it's just gonna continue and continue and continue.