Caitlin Reilly Disobeys Bridger

Summary

I Said No Gifts! — “Caitlin Reilly Disobeys Bridger”

Podcast: I Said No Gifts!
Host: Bridger Winegar
Guest: Caitlin Reilly
Original Release: April 2, 2026

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Episode Overview

This episode welcomes comedian, actor, and impressionist Caitlin Reilly as Bridger Winegar’s guest. Despite the titular rule (“I said no gifts!”), Caitlin arrives with a gift—wrapped in a London-bought white sweater. Their chat quickly spirals into the delightfully absurd and candid territory the show is known for: from modern security systems and uncomfortable childhood memories to gamer obsessions, viral internet moments, ergonomic mall furniture, and mystically erotic tarot. With plenty of self-deprecating humor and sharp takes, this episode is packed with comedic banter, intimate anecdotes, and improvisational riffs, all sprinkled with just enough earnestness to feel like a conversation with old friends (who refuse to take themselves, or gift-giving, too seriously).

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Key Discussion Points & Insights

1. Opening Chit-Chat & Caitlin’s Arrival

• [05:41] Bridger jokes about feeling “out of control” and not getting attacked by his neighbor’s dog being a highlight of his week.

• Caitlin arrives late due to alarm trouble at home (with a house guest setting it off), parking confusion, and wandering the wrong apartment building.

• Quote:

  “I was like disrespectfully late. I was like 20 minutes late.”
  — Caitlin [05:47]

• They laugh about Smart Home alarms (SimpliSafe): whether everything today is mining for your personal information, and Bridger jokes about spinning off a red-pilled AI Caitlin voice.

2. Documentary Deep-Dive: The Manosphere

• [07:27] The pair discuss a new documentary on the "manosphere," Louis Theroux-style, where the host manages to interview internet-famous, deeply problematic men.
• Conversation turns to Caitlin’s 17-year-old nephew and the surprising resurgence of conservative gender ideas in Gen Z/Gen Alpha.
• Quote:

  “Inside a teenager’s mind, thinking in that way just doesn’t seem at all familiar to me.”
  — Bridger [10:23]

3. Gaming (Switch, Harry Potter, and Hogwarts Legacy)

• [12:14] Caitlin and Bridger bond over gaming. Bridger’s obsessed with “Pocopoe” (a Pokémon-adjacent Switch game), and Caitlin details her immersive Hogwarts Legacy phase and current Star Wars Outlaws obsession, preferring “open-world adventure based on movies.”
• They joke about the ethical complications of still loving wizard games given J.K. Rowling’s politics. (Caitlin: “She’s a total loser.” [14:21])
• Quote:

  "We're all kind of trapped. But we should always, just note: J. K. Rowling eats shit."
  — Bridger [13:51]

4. Pop Culture Hot Takes: Joker, John Waters, and Hudson Williams

• [16:03] Caitlin and Bridger spar playfully over the "Joker" movies (Caitlin: “Never hated a movie more”), only for John Waters’ endorsement to cause a moment of reconsideration.
• Spiraling into celebrity encounters: Caitlin met “Connor Story” and gushes over the cast of “Heated Rivalry,” lightly skewering the artifice of Hollywood events.

5. On Russians Acting, Gift-Giving, and Podcast Etiquette

• The duo riff about whether Russians can act (satirical), only for Caitlin to mention her friend who’s genuinely Russian and an actress—but refuses to name her.
• Bridger gently needles Caitlin for breaking the show’s central rule: showing up late and bringing a gift.
• Quote:

  “You showed up really late. That was rude. Then I saw you holding a gift. That was rude. ... I don't know what the third strike will be.”
  — Bridger [21:23]

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6. The Gift: Erotic Tarot Cards (with Sweater Wrapping)

• [24:29] The reveal: Caitlin’s gift is a beautifully wrapped (in a white sweater) erotic tarot deck from London.
• Notable Exchange:

  “If you want to have a tarot deck in your house, you shouldn’t go out and buy yourself a tarot deck. You should use a tarot deck that was gifted to you.”
  — Caitlin [25:41]
  “Is that true?”
  — Bridger [25:58]

• The duo begin reading each other’s cards, getting sidetracked on the mysterious meanings, the (lack of) eroticism in their pulls, and making fun of the vague, AI-sounding booklet descriptions.
• Quote:

  “I have wondered, when will she bring an erotic element in the gifting?”
  — Bridger [27:20]

Tarot Highlights

• Bridger Draws: Three of Candles (“Spontaneity, Fast action, Passion... Take your ideas for a walk. Maybe a third component may further ignite.” [30:13])
• Caitlin Draws: The Chariot (“Will to succeed... Fame... Championing, Graduation, Adolescent cockiness...” [34:45])
• Both mock the vagueness (“What is happening? I don't even know what this means.” — Caitlin [36:39]) and decide everything apparently means “fame.”

7. Memory Lane: Tattoos, Dermatologists, and Wart Stories

• [43:43] Caitlin shares her story of trying (and failing) to have a tattoo removed at Laser Away: procedural chaos, customer service drama, and eventual Instagram blackmail for a refund.
• This segues into tales of childhood warts, dermatologist loyalty, beige eye-patches, and the ‘coolness’ (or lack thereof) of embracing physical quirks.
• Quote:

  "We have finally sexified the eyepatch. Next it'll be the peg leg."
  — Caitlin [51:44]

8. Mall Culture and Interior Design Tangents

• [55:03] The two indulge in a whimsical breakdown of mall furniture logistics, Sims & Tycoon video game nostalgia, and the virtues/vices of carpet versus wallpaper.
• Caitlin laments millennial interior design: "I think it's the worst thing we've done to society." [58:10]

9. The Great Footwear Debate

• [60:26] A candid (and hilarious) exchange about footwear preferences, mall couches, footwear taboos (jeans with flip-flops: universally condemned), and Caitlin’s passionate plea: “I don’t want to see anyone’s feet ever.”
• Bridger asserts that “this is a podcast for guys—in the manosphere. Specifically cool guys.” [61:43]

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Notable Quotes & Memorable Moments

• On Gift-Giving Theory:

  "I feel like every house should have a tarot deck, and it should be gifted."
  — Caitlin Riley [26:20]

• On J.K. Rowling:

  “Imagine accomplishing the most incredible thing like creating [Harry Potter] and then failing so hard as a human being that if you die tomorrow, everyone's like, yeah, wow, that was the most loser person, truly. Can you imagine?”
  — Caitlin Riley [14:21]

• On the “No Gifts” Rule:

  “You said you gifts, right?”
  — Caitlin Riley [21:30]
  “I’ve wondered when will she bring an erotic element in the gifting.”
  — Bridger [27:20]

• On Tarot Cards:

  “What does that leave for the rest of the cards? I feel like it covered every corner of the erotic world.”
  — Bridger [31:50]

• On Mall couches and Sims:

  "Do malls talk to each other and they just have a warehouse of mall furniture?"
  — Caitlin Riley [55:53]

• On Little Free Libraries:

  “Okay, so that's really performative to me, and I don't like it... Part of me is like, oh, great. I'm sure you have, like, homemade granola in your kitchen.”
  — Caitlin [74:00]

  • Bridger pronounces these a "gift" for allowing strangers to snoop through other people’s stuff. [74:39]

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Important Segments & Timestamps

• Alarm mayhem and Caitlin’s Late Arrival: [05:42 – 07:04]
• Manosphere/Documentary and Gen Z Politics: [07:27 – 11:15]
• Gaming Chat (Harry Potter, Star Wars): [12:14 – 13:35]
• On J.K. Rowling’s Legacy: [13:40 – 14:48]
• Hollywood Events & Russian Actors: [18:18 – 20:25]
• Gift Reveal (Erotic Tarot) and Riffing: [24:29 – 37:01]
• Tattoo & Dermatologist Trauma: [43:43 – 47:37]
• Warts, Eye Patches, Childhood Embarrassment: [50:06 – 51:41]
• Mall Furniture & Sims Nostalgia: [55:03 – 58:10]
• Footwear Rant: [60:26 – 62:10]
• Gift or a Curse Game: [70:56 – 76:06]
• Answering a Listener’s Advice Question (The No Skips Vinyl Dilemma): [76:18 – 82:03]

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Tone, Energy, and Chemistry

The episode is marked by rapid-fire banter, irreverent humor, and an easy rapport that occasionally tips into affectionate roasting. Caitlin matches Bridger’s offbeat energy, swinging between exaggerated critiques, withering sarcasm, and quick-witted callbacks. Both revel in the show’s tongue-in-cheek rule-breaking ethos.

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Episode Closer

The episode’s final minutes are a whirlwind of honest self-reflection (Caitlin calls herself a “kind of an annoying guest”), mutual apologies, and the kind of tongue-in-cheek self-effacement that is the show’s trademark. They joke about their “deleted” episode being released posthumously, Bridger teases the fans with “the podcast is over, move on!”—and the love/hate relationship with gifts is fully intact.

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For Listeners New and Familiar

This episode is a quintessential “I Said No Gifts!”:

• Come for: the snark, the randomness, and the delightfully circuitous storytelling.
• Stay for: the strangely poignant moments about friendship—no matter how many rules get broken, or tarot cards drawn with dubious meaning.

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Quick Reference

Tarot Pulls:

• Bridger: Three of Candles (Spontaneity & Collaboration)
• Caitlin: The Chariot (Fame & New Experiences)
• Joint: King of Shells (“Gentle and experienced in lovemaking. Oceanic masculinity.”)

Listener Dilemma: What “no skips” album to bring when you’re told “your presence is gift enough…but also bring a vinyl you love.”

Best advice: Don’t go. Or bring Limp Bizkit’s “Chocolate Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water” as a prank.

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For more Bridger banter (and to see the white sweater and tarot deck), follow @isaidnogifts on Instagram.

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[End of Summary]

Transcript

[Caitlin Riley]

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[Caitlin Riley]

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[Caitlin Riley]

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[Caitlin Riley]

When I invited you here, I thought I made myself perfectly clear. I guess to my home you got to come to me empty handed. I said no. Guess your presence is presence enough. And I already had too much stuff. So how do you dare disobey me?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Welcome to I said no gifts. I'm Bridger Weiniger. I'm feeling loose, I'm feeling wild, I'm feeling out of control. I what is happening? I've been playing a lot of a video game called Pocopoe. This is a video game where you've got to kind of just take care of Pokemon. You've got to make sure the Pokemon are comfortable. I've been for the last few days, I have been just making sure all of my Pokemon are comfortable. I've barely had a minute for myself. I had a confrontation with my neighbor's dog. If it had attacked and killed me, we probably wouldn't be recording today. So that's kind of my life. Not getting attacked by a dog, taking care of my Pokemon. My retainer is being cleaned as we speak. It's at home in the glass with the tablet. So I've got one thing to look forward to. And do I have any business? Let's see. No, I don't think so. I mean, I am wondering if anybody knows if the man who does my taxes, if he exists. He's out of touch. Bruce, reach out. The deadline's coming and I could use some assistance. So I think. And Jim has left town. Jim is out of town. So you can see that my structure is just completely lost. I've. I need somebody with a strong hand in my life essentially. I think that that's all we have to talk about. Oh, somebody mentioned to me recently the gift or a curse card game. They're running out of that. So if you want one, go to exactlyrightstore.com and then find your way online. I don't know. Let's get into the podcast. Today's guest is wonderful. It's Caitlin Riley. Caitlin, welcome to I said no gifts.

[Caitlin Riley]

Thank you so much for having me.

[Bridger Weiniger]

How are you?

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm so good. Just watching you work is beautiful and fascinating. What a profesh.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Thank you so much.

[Caitlin Riley]

You're like our Dick Clark.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I am. I'M essentially our Dick Clark.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, you really are.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But now I get to do the ball countdown.

[Caitlin Riley]

I mean, who cares?

[Bridger Weiniger]

When's my rockin New Year's Eve?

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't know, but you need to get on there.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I need a rockin New Year's Eve.

[Caitlin Riley]

You really do.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You were telling me right before we started recording that you've had some alarm trouble.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes, I have a house guest right now. And so I had to go back and fix the alarm. So I was late. I was late. I was like disrespectfully late. I was like 20 minutes late.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It was. Oh, 20 minutes? I don't think so. 15.

[Caitlin Riley]

I parked four blocks away accidentally, and then I was walking around an apartment building and I was like, I didn't know I was going to Bridger's apartment.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What is this?

[Caitlin Riley]

And then I realized that I was not at my destination, so I had to go back. It was really a series of unfortunate events.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Did you move the car to our beautiful park or you still.

[Caitlin Riley]

No, I parked on the street cause I couldn't find the parking lot. I was in an absolute tizzy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is what the alarm will do though.

[Caitlin Riley]

I know.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Did the house guest call and say I set off the alarm or did the alarm company call or the police?

[Caitlin Riley]

You get a notification and so there's like a 10 second countdown and then they're like, something's wrong. So then you have to go back and fix it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh God. And what happens then? Then it alerts the police.

[Caitlin Riley]

I feel like it alerts. I think it's Simplisafe.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, yes, sure. I have Simplisafe as well.

[Caitlin Riley]

Are they a sponsor?

[Bridger Weiniger]

We don't know what they are or if they're collecting our information. We don't know what they are.

[Caitlin Riley]

As a company, I think everything's collecting our information. I think you're collecting my information.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're collecting your voice. We're going to do a spin off of this podcast using the AI with your voice.

[Caitlin Riley]

But it's gonna be just like completely red pilled. Just like my. My voice but saying the most insane, horrible things. Tin hat theories, Awful things about women, Awful things about women. Awful things about anyone that should have rights or any kind of love or compassion of any kind.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I just watched the. There's a new documentary about the manosphere. Have you seen this?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes, yes, yes. I was waiting to watch it with my husband, lol. But then I watched it myself because women's rights, right?

[Bridger Weiniger]

You should have waited for your guy.

[Caitlin Riley]

I should have waited for my guy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I should have waited for your guy.

[Caitlin Riley]

But it is fascinating. That guy does a really good documentary.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. It's really interesting the way he's able to get into these people's world and basically tell them they're idiots and they keep him around anyway. I don't know how he's doing it.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think, yeah, he creates this safe space for them to just let their freak flag fly in front of a camera.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But he is saying things to them. He tells one guy he needs to work on his calves.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, well, you don't say that to a straight man ever.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, no, no. And he doesn't.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So I wonder if there's like. Is this sort of like an uncle energy where you bring them in and they're able to razz you a little bit, but you keep them around? I'm like, how are they so open with?

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, is he. What's his name?

[Bridger Weiniger]

His name? Louis Thoreau.

[Caitlin Riley]

Is he British or Australian?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think he's British.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. So I feel like any person that's British kind of gets like a social free pass.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah.

[Caitlin Riley]

Because all of a sudden, for some reason I trust you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. I imagine you're smarter than me.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. You sound really smart. And I feel like you're just kind of here to just observe.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then that one influencer's mom showing up at the end was, what's going on with her? What's going on with any of these horrible people?

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, God. It's really, really disturbing. It's really disturbing.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, I was obviously upset not to be invited on. Of course, as a key member of

[Caitlin Riley]

the story, you're very much a part of the manosphere, I would say a cornerstone. Yeah. I think you're a founding father for sure of that ilk.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It feels like just an entirely different universe. I'm like, these people are unbelievably famous and I've never seen or heard of them.

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, yeah, I mean, My nephew is 17. I know. And so he's sort of like, I'm not a Republican, but I'm also not a Democrat. Which is, I think. Well, I don't. Are we talking politics on your book?

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're talking 17 year old politics.

[Caitlin Riley]

We're talking 17 year old politics where he said that. And I was like, for a 17 year old, I feel like that's a red flag.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's huge as a teenager.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. So I'm like, so what are you. You know, And I think that he dabbles in this world a little bit. And there's this New wave of Gen Zers. Or. I don't. Is it Gen Alpha now?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Where are Gen Alpha is really coming up with. I saw a headline that was like 25% of Gen Alpha thinks that the woman should stay at home or something.

[Caitlin Riley]

And so that's the thing. He wants to get married super young. He wants to have like six kids.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What?

[Caitlin Riley]

He. He wants his wife to be a stay at home mom. Like, I'm a little worried, I'm a little scared. I don't really know what's going on.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. Like inside a teenager's mind, thinking in that way just doesn't seem at all familiar to me.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, I think we're going a little. They're very. The youngins are very conservative, these kids.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Don't they realize that's gonna get in the way of their gaming? If you've got six kids, you're not gonna be able to get on Twitch.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's true. That's a good point. They all wanna be Twitch streamers.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right? So I don't. These things don't feel compat.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, maybe that's the wife having to clean the house while you sit on Twitch.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right. Well, because man can play game, wife can clean kitchen.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. You know, the natural order.

[Caitlin Riley]

The natural order of things. Instead of hunting, we're gaming now. So they're hunting, but in the game,

[Bridger Weiniger]

you know, gamers don't come for me. I'm playing Pokemon. Relax.

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, you mentioned that. I'm a gamer myself.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're all gamers at heart.

[Caitlin Riley]

We're all gamers at heart. Come on. Wait, so is this like a game on your phone or what?

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is a game on my switch. It's called Pocopia.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, so I have a switch, but I never charge it. And I forget about it will cause problems for you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's kind of like I never played. Did you ever play Animal Crossing?

[Caitlin Riley]

I got really bored.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. I'm bored by that as well. People were wild about it, but.

[Caitlin Riley]

And people told me, oh, Covid. Yeah, I know. Elijah Wood was a big Animal Crossing player from what I remember.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. I mean, almost everyone. And I felt very alienated because I found it boring.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's boring.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is kind of like that. But it's not boring. Because you are concerned about everyone's comfort. And if you care about. If you're an empath like me, you will be like.

[Caitlin Riley]

Or just like someone with trauma.

[Bridger Weiniger]

With trauma. You'll be like, what does Bulbasaur need right now?

[Caitlin Riley]

What does Bulbasaur need? Is there fighting there's no fighting yet. Okay. I need fighting.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, you need to pit them. You need the kind of dog fighting aspect of fighting.

[Caitlin Riley]

I need fighting, but it needs to be magical.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

So I, about two years ago, got really unhealthily obsessed with Hogwarts legacy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, sure. And this is. Do you like, Are you Harry Potter in this or you're another wit search.

[Caitlin Riley]

So you're. It's like 125 years before the story of Harry Potter started.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

So you're a student at Hogwarts.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

And they sort you in a house and it's a full open world.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

And there are main quests, there are side quests, but you are a wizard. And it's really incredible.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I imagine it kind of takes over your life.

[Caitlin Riley]

It does. I played, I think I logged 127 hours in a month.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh my God.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What's the end game in this thing?

[Caitlin Riley]

You just, you. You finish it. So then after that I moved on to. What am I playing right now? Star Wars Outlaws, where basically you're this female character named Kay Vess, but she's essentially Han Solo.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

And you go on a lot of craz.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're a real gamer.

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, I realized that it has to be open world adventure based and it has to be based off of a movie. My husband was like, you should play Skyrim. And I was like, no, that's stupid. But it's essentially the same thing.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's also like a wizardy thing, I think.

[Caitlin Riley]

I like wizards.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. I love wizards.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, obviously there's the complication of J.K. rowling at this point, of course.

[Caitlin Riley]

And so that is the issue that I have found where sort of my soul is like, I feel like I shouldn't be doing.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're all kind of trapped. We should, I mean, but we should always, you know, just note JK Rowling eats shit sort of situation.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, she shouldn't die.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But the wonderful world of wizarding, it's very complicated.

[Caitlin Riley]

But wizards, I mean, it's not the right. I don't think she got a paycheck from this.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. I mean, unfortunately, I think she makes a paycheck from probably like every book sale at this point. This woman is just pure evil.

[Caitlin Riley]

And yeah, she's awful.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Just kind of. I actually feel like evil is cool. She's like a loser. No, she's a total loser.

[Caitlin Riley]

I mean, imagine like so like if she died tomorrow, the only thing that we'll be talking about is. God, she fucking sucked. Like, imagine accomplishing the most incredible thing like creating this magical, world renowned series of Harry Potter and then failing so hard as a human being that if you die tomorrow, everyone's like, yeah. Wow. That was the most loser person, truly. Can you imagine?

[Bridger Weiniger]

She spends all of her day online.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Get a life, honey.

[Caitlin Riley]

Get a life. Well, she has more money than God.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I know, but, like, do something.

[Caitlin Riley]

Go to Costa Rica and get offline. What is wrong with you?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Find one hobby.

[Caitlin Riley]

Start needle stitching. Is that what it's called?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Needle stitching?

[Caitlin Riley]

Needle stitching.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That might be a needle. Oh. Now needle pointing, needle point.

[Caitlin Riley]

Cross stitch.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Stitching. Cross stitching, needle point. These are separate disciplines. And is there a third one? Crochet.

[Caitlin Riley]

Crochet is really fun.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. See, look at us. We're thinking of ideas for this lady.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. We're trying to help her.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's also the sort of thing where it's like, change your mind and suddenly you're the coolest person alive.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

People are like, wow, there's someone who actually figured it out.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Instead, she's online. She's on Twitter.

[Caitlin Riley]

Twitter.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Just a loser.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's X, actually.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Thank you. Thank you for showing it the respect it deserves.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Give it the respect it deserves. It's X. Now, I actually got bullied because I made a joke. And the joke was Emma Stone could do the Joker, but Joaquin Phoenix could never do La La Land.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, interesting. Oh, wow. You were. I mean, just throwing yourself out there to be devoured.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. So I think the Joker had come out. And respectfully, I've never hated a movie more.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's so bad.

[Caitlin Riley]

I've never hated a movie more. And then the second one was like, oh, wow, it's even worse, Caitlyn. But I feel like I can't say those things, otherwise I'm not gonna get.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm gonna say something controversial.

[Caitlin Riley]

What?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I didn't mind Joker, too. Okay, Bridget, look, I'm willing to defend myself.

[Caitlin Riley]

Is it because I was.

[Bridger Weiniger]

John Waters is on my side, by the way.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. And I do remember John Waters coming

[Bridger Weiniger]

out, which validated my feelings.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. And so I do remember that happening. And I remember thinking, huh, John Waters sees something here. So I think it was like a boomerang where the Joker too, was so, like, what the fuck crazy that it boomeranged back around. And then it was like expert camp.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Absolutely. In so many ways. It was like, it made all of the people who liked the original bad one mad.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Which that alone, I was like, this feels good. This feels good that those people are mad. And it was just weird and Strange. The first one was just kind of a ripoff of Taxi Driver. The second one was like, what am I looking at?

[Caitlin Riley]

Right?

[Bridger Weiniger]

It was really. I mean, there was a courtroom sequence that was like seven hours long, of course. But I went in with such low expectations that my friend and I looked at each other after and we were like, that wasn't that bad.

[Caitlin Riley]

Interesting.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then John Waters comes along and says it was one of his favorite movies of the year. And I thought, okay, maybe they did something here.

[Caitlin Riley]

You do have a very good point. I might have to give it a rewatch in the background while I'm doing laundry.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I hate to defend anything. Joker, Men, the Joker, any of these things.

[Caitlin Riley]

But I mean, at the end of the day, everyone's making art, right? And that's okay. And that's good. And art is good. And art's important. Right?

[Bridger Weiniger]

And it was a big reveal of Connor's story. Wait, you know he's at the end of that movie. I mean, he's throughout the movie and he's like, the big shocking end of the movie.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't remember. I only watched bits and pieces.

[Bridger Weiniger]

People are gonna look, there's gonna be a retrospective.

[Caitlin Riley]

But that's on me because I'm sitting here saying, I hate a movie that I didn't watch.

[Bridger Weiniger]

All of it. Okay, interesting. So now this is. You're giving fuel to the manosphere, right? You're gonna be bullied off of this podcast, right? No, he's at the end of the movie. Spoiler. He kills Joaquin Phoenix.

[Caitlin Riley]

That was Connor's story.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yes.

[Caitlin Riley]

I love him.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He's great.

[Caitlin Riley]

He's so good. It's so funny. Before I watched Heated Rivalry, it had just come out. I was at an event.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You can kind of say that about literally anything in your life.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, I was at an event.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're constantly at an event. Just get loose with the definition.

[Caitlin Riley]

I was at a pop up event. I was buying groceries, but I was at an event. And Connor Story walks. I'm gonna call him Connor Stories. Cause I think that's funnier.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think I've done that by mistake.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. But he walked past me and he was like, I love you. You're the funniest person alive. And I was like, oh, thank you. And I was like, oh, that's the Russian guy from Heated Rivalry. The next day I watched it. It took over my life and my soul, and I must find him again. You will, because now I love him.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He seems like a genuinely nice person. Yeah, great Russian.

[Caitlin Riley]

Great Russian. And let's not Forget Hudson Williams. Let's not forget Hudson Williams. BB Girl.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He does a great job too.

[Caitlin Riley]

He was incredible of both of the boys.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We don't want to laugh.

[Caitlin Riley]

We love Hudson Williams. He's a cutie patootie.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He just doesn't do a Russian accent or Russian.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And that's an impressive thing. I kept saying trying to be smart through the first two episodes to my boyfriend. Oh, this is all just really high tech. CG with the Russian. They've done some sort of dubbing that can't possibly.

[Caitlin Riley]

Did you really think that?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. I was like, really? I was just like, this feels so convincing. How could he possibly. As a stupid person. I was just like, there's no way. And as kind of an undisciplined person who would never possibly learn how to do that.

[Caitlin Riley]

I know. I wouldn't either.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I was like, well, there's just no way he. Unless his parents are Russian, but they're not. I guess he's just that good.

[Caitlin Riley]

I thought he was Russian. Russian. But then I was like, can Russians act?

[Bridger Weiniger]

How interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's the big question. Can they act? I don't know. I don't think they can act like that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't know if one Russian has ever been able to act.

[Caitlin Riley]

Name a Russian.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Give me proof.

[Caitlin Riley]

Name a Russian who can act.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I can't think of one.

[Caitlin Riley]

I can't think of one.

[Bridger Weiniger]

If I can't think of one, it's obviously true.

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, one of my best friends is full blown Russian and she's an incredible actress.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, Interesting. Yet you're not willing to name her.

[Caitlin Riley]

She will be unnamed. She'll be unnamed.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're not her publicist, you're her friend.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm gonna have to get paid if I'm gonna name her.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, I mean, look, speaking of shocking things and people being stupid, I was looking forward to having you here on the podcast today, Katie.

[Caitlin Riley]

Thank you so much. I was looking forward to being here. I'm such a fan of the pod.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Thank you. I mean, well, look, I guess that may or may not be true because the podcast is called I said no

[Caitlin Riley]

Gifts, which I love. I love that title and I love the cuntiness of it and I love that you are just sort of adorned. Like. I feel very like I should have done. I should have done that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, are you a little jealous of all the things I did?

[Caitlin Riley]

I am a little jealous. I kind of feel like I should have put a little more oomph in my gift that I brought here.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Interesting. So you did bring a gift I

[Caitlin Riley]

did bring a gift. I did.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I did notice you, you know, you showed up really late. That was rude. Then I saw you holding a gift. That was rude. Yeah, because you said you gifts, right?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't know what the third strike will be, but I haven't said anything offensive. No, nothing offensive.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, good. Not yet. Thank God we're not having wine.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's wine o'. Clock. Well, should we get into the gift here?

[Caitlin Riley]

I think that we should.

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[Caitlin Riley]

it's not wrapped. I think maybe that's.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think it's wrapped.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I would say it's beautifully wrapped.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's in kind of this gorgeous white sweater.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's in this gorgeous white sweater that I picked up in London.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh.

[Caitlin Riley]

And it is meant to wrap gifts.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. Of course. This is a gift sweater.

[Caitlin Riley]

Should I hand it to you? And then you unwrap it?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Let me unwrap this.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. Let's see if we can get. Can we get Sweater Noise on the podcast?

[Caitlin Riley]

Sweater noise.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Soft.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're unwrapping. Oh.

[Caitlin Riley]

What could it be?

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's erotic Tarot.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, my God.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is. I've said this before. This is an erotic podcast.

[Caitlin Riley]

And that is how I felt coming here. Is that. This is erotic, ultimately.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Erotic.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

An erotic manosphere podcast.

[Caitlin Riley]

An erotic manosphere podcast where there are no Russians in sight because Russians cannot act.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. There are a few rules, and that's kind of what we build this on. Why did you bring me erotic Tarot?

[Caitlin Riley]

Because I know you really, really well. I've known you for years.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

And I just kind of feel like that. That is so you. It's so you. And do you wanna know a rule? If you want to have a tarot deck in your house, you should not go out and buy yourself a tarot deck. You should use a tarot deck that was gifted to you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Is that true?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Why?

[Caitlin Riley]

It's. I don't know. Some witch made it up.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. It feels like maybe some sort of bad. Someone decided at some point that's bad luck to bring.

[Caitlin Riley]

Or maybe just like a tarot store that was like, you should come in and just buy a bunch of decks for your friends. Cause that's the rule. So I feel like every house should have a tarot deck and it should be gifted.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think that's nice.

[Caitlin Riley]

And I saw that and I thought it was really beautiful. And I was like. Cause I've known You.

[Bridger Weiniger]

For years. A decade at this point.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Our parents are each other's parents and our friends are each other's friends.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. Our parents are each other's parents. Everyone knows that.

[Caitlin Riley]

Everyone knows that. Whatever that means.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We know exactly what that means.

[Caitlin Riley]

Of course.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't even need to think about it.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. I mean, you're. You're my bridger and I'm your Caitlin. I mean, we've just been doing this for so long.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're very close.

[Caitlin Riley]

Very close.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And you've given me so many things over the years.

[Caitlin Riley]

Outside of Tarot, what's your favorite thing I've given you?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, it was the bike.

[Caitlin Riley]

The bike.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Do you remember the bike?

[Caitlin Riley]

The bike? Yes. The baby blue bike.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's in the parking lot right now.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, you're still using it?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I rode it to Burbank.

[Caitlin Riley]

From where?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Highland Park.

[Caitlin Riley]

And that is a ride.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. And look, not a drop of sweat on me.

[Caitlin Riley]

Not a drop. Because it glides.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Because it glides. And I've been writing it for years, so, you know, I'm so glad.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm so glad. That makes me happy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm so glad. I know you're a good gift giver.

[Caitlin Riley]

Thank you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I have wondered, when will she bring an erotic element in the gifting?

[Caitlin Riley]

Should you pull a card?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Of course. Okay, let's see here. Do you do like. Are you familiar with what each card means?

[Caitlin Riley]

Sort of. But also, my house guest did like an hour long tarot reading on me last night.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Wow.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, it's kind of just like something that's energetically happening within me right now. But I think in there is probably a little booklet that'll help us along. That'll help us along.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I wanna read the back. It says, be guided by your desire. Okay. I'm way ahead of you. Deepen your personal tarot journey with a focus on love and pleasure. Pleasure. This fully illustrated 78 card tarot deck comes with an extensive booklet guiding you through ways of reading the car to help you explore intimate possibilities, unlock your erotic potential. I'm finally ready to unlock my erotic potential.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, I just think it's so you. Yeah, it really is so you, you know?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Of course, of course. Okay, let's open it up. Oh, I like how that sounds.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's nice. It's like an Apple box. Yeah, it's like a box that you would get from the Apple store.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Not an Apple box designed in Cupertino.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right? This could be an Apple product. Okay. Look at how sexy.

[Caitlin Riley]

Ooh. Wow. This is like A little.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is very sexy. What is this going to lead to? The podcast is getting steamy.

[Caitlin Riley]

Should I shuffle the cards?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah, shuffle. Let's see. Yeah. Cause I'm gonna pull it for you. So you need to shuffle it. You need to.

[Caitlin Riley]

You're gonna pull it for you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, okay. So you. So I should shuffle, right? So I can imbue it with my energy.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Feels right. I don't know why I'm telling you.

[Caitlin Riley]

No, that's. No, I'm gonna pull for you. You shuffle and I'm gonna pull for you. Those are the rules.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, I think what the trouble I'm having right now is when the person pulls for. So you pull for me. That means the card will be about me. Okay, so I need to touch the cards right now. And then when I pull for you.

[Caitlin Riley]

But I'm the interpreter, Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

When it's your turn to get your tarot read, you will touch the cards.

[Caitlin Riley]

Sure.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then I will pull for you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Or we can also just do whatever the fuck we want.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, no. It's better for me. This is serious. This is erotic.

[Caitlin Riley]

This is serious. This is erotic.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is going to lead to me unlocking my potential, and I'm not going to screw around. Okay. I did a. I can't shuffle cards.

[Caitlin Riley]

They're shuffled enough.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm no dealer. Okay, so there we go.

[Caitlin Riley]

And.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, so now.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, so now you pull. Okay, so now energetically, pick a card.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, here we go. So now I flip. You flip it. People are so mad about this.

[Caitlin Riley]

So this is the three of candles.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Ooh, that's erotic. Okay, what is the three of candles?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, look at that. Let me see that card.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, look at this card.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Three of candles.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I will say it's, you know, it's like a red candelabra with some pink melting candles. Three of candles. I don't think I've ever seen a three of candles in another deck. So are they like.

[Caitlin Riley]

These are kind of like. Each deck is sort of like. It's jelly beans.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So then it's like the nine of

[Caitlin Riley]

jelly beans and the four of gumdrops. You know, they're kind of. I think candles is maybe swords.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Swords, Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. Three of candles. Okay, so the candles, which is actually supposed to be wands in a classic tarot card.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Spontaneity.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Fast action.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Fast action. That's erotic.

[Caitlin Riley]

Passion.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Passion. Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Power.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Power.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, adrenaline. Oh, life force. Creative fuel and urges.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Inspired work. Stroke of genius. And this is the three of candles. Stay determined to remain adventurous. Take your ideas for a walk. Take your ideas for a walk, Bridget.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What does that have to do with eroticism?

[Caitlin Riley]

Seek outside influences. A third component may further ignite.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, interesting, right? Go on a walk and find a third.

[Caitlin Riley]

And then there's a little sub comment. Don't be nonchalant about any collaborations proposed to you. Make sure all parties are comfortable going forward.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What am I supposed to do with that information? And also, what does that leave for the rest of the cards? I feel like it covered every corner of the erotic world.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right. What's more erotic than that?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. Okay, well, let's have you imbue the cards with your energy. Let me pull for you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Or you pull for. Again, my apologies to the new age community. Crystal shop owners are mad. They're mad.

[Caitlin Riley]

But you know, these are really impossible to shuffle.

[Bridger Weiniger]

They're very difficult. Anytime I'm in charge of shuffling cards, I embarrass myself.

[Caitlin Riley]

I feel like I'm in mouth class again.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is awful. Matt.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. I was bad at math in school. I was diagnosed with adhd.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Did they make you do cards?

[Caitlin Riley]

No, they just gave me like extensive testing and then started talking to me like I couldn't hear. So that was my high school experience. Caitlin, are you doing okay? Is this all. Is the lesson making sense to you? Yep. I'm sexually active and I smoke clove cigarettes. I'm doing good anyway. Just me trauma dumping on you. Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

All right. I think it's fully wrong what we're doing.

[Caitlin Riley]

And then you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think I'm supposed to be like, bop, bop, bop. But let's. We have to, you know, eye for an eye. So you just pull one. We gotta have kind of a one for one situation.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. Mine is the Chariots.

[Bridger Weiniger]

The Chariot. And look at. Describe what's happening on that chariot card.

[Bowen Yang]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

This card, it looks like a. A gay pride parade.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It looks like gay Mad Max.

[Caitlin Riley]

It looks like Gay Mad Max is exactly what it looks like.

[Bridger Weiniger]

They're like, there's a car. There's a biker gang.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. They're on their way to Long beach.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Obviously. They're headed south. And there are four people in a car. Three who are standing.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Which is really unsafe.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

And I'm not about, like non safety on the road.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, no, no.

[Caitlin Riley]

Like, I don't like that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Seatbelts.

[Caitlin Riley]

Seatbelts, please.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We went through a large period of human history where a seatbelt was optional. Which is interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes. Like. Yeah. What was it that the seventies. I wasn't alive. I'm so young. What was the seventies. Like

[Bridger Weiniger]

you're afraid people are going to think you were born in 1940.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, well, I'm online a lot and people think I'm like someone's grandmother.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Who is this lady? Is she 80 years old?

[Caitlin Riley]

What are you still doing on TikTok?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Let me read your.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm trying to.

[Bridger Weiniger]

There's a thing for you. What is it?

[Caitlin Riley]

The Chariot. Chariot. Let me try and find it for you. I think it's at the front.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. The Empress. The Emperor. Okay. Let's see. The fool.

[Caitlin Riley]

I feel like you don't like my gift.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I love this, actually.

[Caitlin Riley]

What do you like about it?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, I love how sexy it is. I love how steamy it is. I love that. It's just kind of bringing a new heat to the podcast.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think you have to go more to the front.

[Bridger Weiniger]

To the front. I went all the way to the front. The chariots.

[Caitlin Riley]

The chariots.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Here we go.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. There we go.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This says your keywords are will to succeed. This is a less success or less sexy thing already. Confidence. Vehicles. Graduates.

[Caitlin Riley]

I love the way you say vehicles. Vestibules.

[Bridger Weiniger]

How would you say Vehicle.

[Caitlin Riley]

Vestibule. A moving entity.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Vehicle.

[Caitlin Riley]

Vehicle.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Vehicles.

[Caitlin Riley]

Vehicles.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Graduation. Adolescent cockiness.

[Caitlin Riley]

What?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. Landing on one's feet. Upstarts and startups. That feels like a CBS sitcom.

[Caitlin Riley]

I kind of feel like this was written by AI Fame.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Probably was. Let's be honest.

[Caitlin Riley]

There's fame in there.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Fame's in there. Yes. We like this for you. And championing.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Which you didn't do for your Russian friend. Her career is falling apart.

[Caitlin Riley]

To get paid.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. Image. It's somebody's first pride Parade. Rainbows around. Ah, My first pride Parade. Okay. It says the feeling of triumph when you set yourself a goal and achieved it for all to see. This is a glorious moment of exhilaration. Onlookers acknowledge and admire you. Bravery and determination have paid off, though this is only the first step in a longer journey. So now you need some advice. This is often a card of first experiences. Make up your mind to do something and then carry it out despite uncertainty and unsteadiness in the early stages. Don't dwell on the details. Keep your courage up and you will win. Take care. You won't get what you want unless you make a decisive effort. Enjoy your victory for a while. But then you'll need a fresh angle. You can't stick to the same approach. This is all over the place. Consider sharing a need to overcome internal conflict. There's the whiplash of what you're supposed to be doing. With your life.

[Caitlin Riley]

What is happening? I don't even know what this means. What does this mean?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm getting motion sickness.

[Caitlin Riley]

I hate this card.

[Bridger Weiniger]

The only thing that works here is fame.

[Caitlin Riley]

So all I heard was fame.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You got stars in your eyes. You're in the Holywood.

[Caitlin Riley]

All I heard is fame. And that people admire me. And then also to what to do

[Bridger Weiniger]

a bunch of it's gonna require work that doesn't. And I don't know that that's gonna be for you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Is that decisive?

[Bridger Weiniger]

No. You strike me as a very lazy person. There's zero sex.

[Caitlin Riley]

God.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're at your first pride parade. You're the dork.

[Caitlin Riley]

Maybe it's telling me that I'm gonna be in LA Pride Parade this year.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, interesting. On a float, which I would love. Fame.

[Caitlin Riley]

Fame.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Interesting. Have you been to a pride parade before?

[Caitlin Riley]

Never.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, so this is actually only for protest.

[Caitlin Riley]

No, I've been to many.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You've driven by Hong Kong.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm an ally. Bridger. Bridger, Bridger.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're an ally.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm an ally.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're an ally?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You know the moment I met you

[Caitlin Riley]

through my parents, years and years ago with my parents or your parents, when

[Bridger Weiniger]

my parents introduced me to your parents, they said, our daughter, you gotta meet this gal. She's an ally.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

She wasn't before. It was bad.

[Caitlin Riley]

I was sort of like, you know, playing pretend in my dollhouse. And like, I didn't wanna be a doctor. I didn't wanna be a marine biologist. I didn't wanna be an actress. I wanted to be an ally.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's what I was pretending to be.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You were pretending?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. What do you want to be when you grow up? An ally.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. And then you went mask off and you were not an ally for that. You know, those five years or so.

[Caitlin Riley]

That was a dark time.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That was a dark time. But we're glad to have you back on our team.

[Caitlin Riley]

Thank you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And now you're meeting Connor Story at events. I know you're kind of. And you're going to be on a float.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm going to be on a float.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Probably of your own design.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Public/True Nature Meats/Advertising Voice]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Could you just show up? You could probably just design a float and show up at a parade.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. I kind of feel like, hey, guys, I've been working on this for a while. It's made of flowers and. Can I just roll through?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

I feel like it is a really intricate process, though.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. And if you do all of the work for that and you show up and they don't let you get in the parade. What are we doing?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, what are parades for? I also kind of. I have a sneaking suspicion that float people are really obnoxious.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Really normal.

[Caitlin Riley]

Ye like, oh, what does your cousin do? She builds floats. She won't stop fucking talking about it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

How do you get into the float biz?

[Caitlin Riley]

How do you get into the float biz?

[Bridger Weiniger]

How do you break in?

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't know.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You probably get big on TikTok.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, big on TikTok. You get like viral for like your cat or something. Then all of a sudden you're sort of like parlayed into the float industry.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Into the float industry.

[Caitlin Riley]

And then all of a sudden you're like, you know, at the red carpet at the Vanity Fair Oscar party, asking, you know, people questions just because that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Good question.

[Caitlin Riley]

That is the pipeline.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Smart questions, incisive questions. You' being obnoxious.

[Caitlin Riley]

I was a float influencer and now I'm at the Met. Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's the natural path.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's the natural path.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's journalism.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's journalism.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's journalism. That's integrity.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bowen Yang]

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[Bridger Weiniger]

what sort of Tarot cards do you have at home?

[Caitlin Riley]

I have a couple. I have one that's like a little pocket Tarot book called the Wild Unknown. Oh, I like that where it's like really cool pictures. And then I was given another tarot deck that I think is Russian.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, okay, so you've brought a Russian

[Caitlin Riley]

theme and those were both gifted to me.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You've never purchased?

[Caitlin Riley]

I purchased this one.

[Bridger Weiniger]

For yourself?

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't think so. No.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, so you're a real natural Tarot person.

[Caitlin Riley]

I just like witchy stuff sometimes, you know, because I don't have a good foundation.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's why you're kind of out of control.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, I'm a little emotionally out of control so I like Tarot cards.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I would describe you first as lost.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm a little lost. I have my Astrological sign tattooed on my wrist that I'm currently in the process of trying to get rid of.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Is that.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Can I see it?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. So it's speckly because I actually started the process of getting it removed at Laserway, but I had a very unfortunate experience there.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Wow.

[Caitlin Riley]

I didn't finish the process.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What is an unfortunate experience at Laserway?

[Caitlin Riley]

It's just At Laser Away.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Is that what it's called?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It sounds like a spin off of massage envy or something.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Yes, yes. God, I miss massage envy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We all do.

[Caitlin Riley]

But no, I went in and there's kind of like, they call you, like, hey, babe or hey, mama. Like, hey, mama, thanks for coming in. And I just, like, call me ma'. Am.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is a medical procedure.

[Caitlin Riley]

This is a medical procedure. Call me by my full government name.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're not on bean bags.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right. And I went in one of the rooms and I'm sitting there, and the practitioner that walked in at one point dropped the machine, was like, ah, sorry, I'm just like, all over the place today. And then dropped the glasses on the ground that she was supposed to put on my face. And then I think I was trying to be kind and charming, so I was like, oh, God, it's my first time. I'm a little nervous. You know, I've also told this story in another podcast, so I apologize.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, well, we'll get those removed.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. But. So she was about to take a laser to my skin, right?

[Bridger Weiniger]

A weapon.

[Caitlin Riley]

It is a procedure. So she was about to take the laser to my skin, but instead she grabs my arm, shakes it, and goes, what?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Why?

[Caitlin Riley]

So then I also start screaming. I look at her, I go, what? What? She cocks her head back, starts laughing hysterically and goes, I'm just fucking with you, girl. And, like, I partly appreciated the gumption. Like, I was like, yes, yes, right? Like, you're my kind of girl. But then the other half of me is like, this is not good at all. And then she did it and she was like, ah, fuck. I feel like it didn't do a lot. Like, I just felt it was just not.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So what are you, like, in this moment? You're like, I'm sorry, this isn't working for me.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. And then. So then I left. And then I had another appointment, like, six weeks later. So I went to that other appointment, same thing. It was just like, kind of chaos. The machine wasn't working, and the girl that was doing me, she's like, I mean, do you wanna use this machine? And I was like, you tell me,

[Bridger Weiniger]

what's the other option?

[Caitlin Riley]

What's going on? So then I got. So it's really expensive and I got mad, and then I complained. So then laser away. Customer service called me to sort of talk about the incident, and I was like, listen, I know that these girls are working really hard. Like, I. But it was just. It was not good. I was like. Also, the room was, like, really dirty and wasn't prepped for a patient. The customer service person I'm talking to goes dirty. What do you mean dirty? Do you have pictures giving me attitude like I'm in a sorority? It was so weird. And then I posted about it on Instagram, and then they finally refunded me because I posted about it on Instagram.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. You eventually kind of have to blackmail them.

[Caitlin Riley]

I blackmailed them on Instagram where I was like, I had such a bad experience there. And then they finally.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You can't privately complain anymore. Private complaints do very little.

[Caitlin Riley]

And I have to say, I do love complaining. When it's warranted, of course. Yeah, I really do love it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, it improves. Whatever the problem is. Eventually somebody is told, and then you might get a free coupon.

[Caitlin Riley]

And I love a free coupon.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I love complaining and coupons. So what a perfect combination. So what was the end result? You got your money back?

[Caitlin Riley]

I got my full money back. And they were like, let's start over. And I was like, you're never touching me again.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Like it's a marriage.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, like someone else. It was just so weird because it was like, no. I think that this is just, like, a poorly run business.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

And you're hiring a bunch of people that you're not training. So it's like, kind of not their fault. It's like management's fault. Whatever. I don't know anything about anything.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Is there another laser place you can turn to?

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't know. And so I have this speckly, stupid tattoo.

[Bridger Weiniger]

When did you get.

[Caitlin Riley]

I got it when I was 23 after a really bad breakup.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, sure.

[Caitlin Riley]

I had cut my hair. I started. I started bleaching it, like, white.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. I like this.

[Caitlin Riley]

I was wearing cut off T shirts.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's very Run Lola Run.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes, I was wearing cut off T shirts. Like, all my T shirts didn't have sleeves because that was sort of like the indie look in 2013. I was going to Harvard and Stone every night.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, great.

[Caitlin Riley]

I was doing improv. That's when I started doing improv. And I was like, I'm gonna.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's the sweetest time in your life?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. And I was like, I'm gonna drive out to Duarte and I'm gonna get a tattoo. And that's exactly what I did.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think it's so inoffensive. I feel like, why just keep it?

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, some people think that it's the word me.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

And then some people think that it's, like, a Christian emblem.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, it's fish. Because, like, the fish, right?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. And then some people think it's another astrological sign that it isn't. So, like, no one really knows what the fuck this is.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Which sign is it?

[Caitlin Riley]

It'. But it looks exactly like Scorpio, except a little different.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I wonder if you. I wouldn't have known that was an astrological sign. I wonder what my guess would have been. I think I would have been like, it's MP And I've been like, who is MP to you?

[Caitlin Riley]

Also, this was supposed to be a matching best friend tattoo with my best friend. And so I got the tattoo first, and it was three times bigger than I had asked. And so she's watching it happen. She's like, wow, that's really big. And then she got it done in a different place right here.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, it's so cool.

[Caitlin Riley]

It looks like a mole. So I got kind of duped.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I would rather have a tattoo than a weird mole on my finger.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'd rather have a weird mole on my finger.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You'd rather have a. That's what you think. But then you're prepping food and people are like, ah, you should have gloves.

[Caitlin Riley]

I mean, what kind of mole are we talking about?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, it seems like if I can spot a mole on a finger, that's a big mole.

[Caitlin Riley]

I have moles on my fingers.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, you don't. People rarely have a mole on their face.

[Caitlin Riley]

They do. You know, it's weird. I had a mole on my finger that actually disappeared.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Did you ever have warts on your hands?

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, my God. I was a wart kid.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You were? Thank God. In Knock on Wood. I wasn't, but that seemed like a tough thing to have.

[Caitlin Riley]

I got warts on my thumbs all the time, and I got warts on my toes all the time.

[Bridger Weiniger]

How does that happen?

[Caitlin Riley]

Just, you know, I was a barefoot kid. I would, like, be in the backyard a lot. I loved feeling like I was a fairy. So, like, movies like the Secret Garden or, like, the Little Princess, Like, I'm just sort of, like, in the wild. And I would have to go to my mom's dermatologist, and they would have to freeze the warts off. And I used to get the same wart on my thumb and. Oh, God, it was so painful. It was like a huge part of my childhood. That and the fact that I had to wear a patch for my lazy eye.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. So that I think a patch is cool. It wasn't cool. It wasn't cool.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm trying to support you here.

[Caitlin Riley]

It wasn't cool. They're like, wow, her eyes are fucked up. It's more patch.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think a patch when it's like the kind of beige color. Not a good look.

[Caitlin Riley]

It was flesh color.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You gotta go with a black one. The black. Black eye patch is cool and dangerous. All the other ones are. I'm embarrassed of my eyepatch. No, embrace it.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's true. That's a good point.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's got a long history with pirates, et cetera. It looks like kind of spooky and edgy.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

The other thing is, don't look at me.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then we're all looking at you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. I do think it's a lot sexier now.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think that we've sexified the iPads.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Finally.

[Caitlin Riley]

Finally. Which is. And good for us. Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

For you and I personally, I think

[Caitlin Riley]

next it'll be the peg leg.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, that could be sexy.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, I feel like all of those things are. You embrace rather than run.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You know?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Embrace all things.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So you have warts. So you have a long history with things being burned off your body?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes. Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

I recently got something burned off my nose. Not a wart, it was a papule.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh. What's the difference between that and a zit?

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, so a papule is like a really hard nodule on your skin that it looks exactly like basal cell carcinoma.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh.

[Caitlin Riley]

And so.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So it could be dangerous.

[Caitlin Riley]

It could be dangerous. I was on TikTok at 2 o' clock in the morning and I saw. I was like, oh, that's that thing on my nose. And this person was like, I had extensive messed up skin cancer on my face. And so I started crying and I woke up my husband and I was like, I have skin cancer. He was like, what? So I went to my dermatologist that burned off my warts when I was a kid.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're still going to the same person?

[Caitlin Riley]

The same one.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Wow. I like a lifelong doctor.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, yeah, yeah. And I went in there in a tizzy. I was like, I have skin cancer. Right. She told me it was a papule. She burned it off.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Are you not going in for a yearly checkup?

[Caitlin Riley]

No. Cause I'm not good at that. But now I'm an adult. And now I am.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You gotta do it.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. So now I have a dentist now.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, you've got a dentist. That's a hard. I just got two all caps texts from my dentist. Really? Not quite sure what's going on.

[Caitlin Riley]

What did they say?

[Bridger Weiniger]

The first was the. The office is sick. We have to cancel your appointment.

[Caitlin Riley]

The office is in all caps. The office is sick. We have to cancel your appointment. Where is this dentist?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't want to name the person, but.

[Caitlin Riley]

What part of town? Why do you have so much dentist? Oh, my God. Hello?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm not sure it's something. I hurt a witch dentist in the past, but.

[Caitlin Riley]

Wait, who is that?

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's Ellis. Ellis is upset that I have a lot of dentists. Dentist drum. And I will say in my defense, I love this dentist. They're in Glendale.

[Caitlin Riley]

Ellis, I'm so sorry. I got so scared by your voice. That was really scary. Can we. That was on me. You guys are trying to breeze. You're trying to breeze past that. I've never been here before.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I protect my dentistry.

[Caitlin Riley]

No, no, no, Ellis, that was really scary.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I push my protect the dentist button and that tells Ellis. Butt in.

[Caitlin Riley]

Ellis chimes in. Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, they're in Glendale. And I love this group of people.

[Caitlin Riley]

What? I hate Glendale.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, I think Glendale is wonderful.

[Caitlin Riley]

I lived in Glendale for three years. It was the first three years of my life.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What was so rough about it?

[Caitlin Riley]

Everything. Everything.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I like Glendale. I like the Americana. I love the Galleria.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, for fuck's sake.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I prefer the Galleria.

[Caitlin Riley]

I prefer anything outside of Glendale. The Americana? Really?

[Bridger Weiniger]

That AMC is the only movie theater I'll go to at this point.

[Caitlin Riley]

The only AMC I'll go to is the one at the. God, the Lamely. The. What's it called? It's off of Sunset.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, no, no, no. It's not even. It's not an amc. It's a landmark. I don't do amc.

[Bridger Weiniger]

The Hollywood one?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, it's off of Sunset. It's where Crunch used to be.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's like the Bermuda Triangle.

[Caitlin Riley]

I know, but they have a landmark theater there that is top drawer.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's very nice. But it's like the park. Oh, my God. I wouldn't even dig.

[Caitlin Riley]

There's a CB2 right there.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Is it free parking?

[Caitlin Riley]

I mean, is anywhere free parking?

[Bridger Weiniger]

The Galleria. And then you walk to the America.

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, yeah. They need people there. Is there a Brookstone still in the Galleria?

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's a good question. Probably. The mall is large and mysterious. They've got three floors. They've got all kinds of nooks and crannies.

[Caitlin Riley]

I bet they have, like, brick and mortar dippin dots.

[Bridger Weiniger]

They have a lot of rotating dessert shops. Yeah, dessert shops and malls. I'm always like, okay, just close it down. Just get ahead of yourself. No one's minding.

[Caitlin Riley]

You're a dessert person.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I love desserts. But in a mall, when it's like waffles with chocolate syrup on them, I'm like, this isn't a mall food. No one's eating this on one of those weird mall couches, right?

[Caitlin Riley]

I love a mall couch.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, do you ever eat on them?

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm sure I have, but I always think, like, I always think when I look at a mall couch and I look at, like, the furniture within an enclosed mall, where is that store? Right? Like, are they, like. Do malls talk to each other and they just have a warehouse of mall furniture or are they buying it from. Is there a mall furniture store or is it like, here's the mall, now we have all the furniture for the mall, which comes from the same guys that built the mall. Like, what's the secret from the guys

[Bridger Weiniger]

who brought you mall?

[Caitlin Riley]

Here's Mal's sofa. Do you know what I mean?

[Bridger Weiniger]

The twisted mind of.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes. From the twisted mind of Beverly Center. We have sort of couch.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think they have. Well, I'm kind of picturing right now playing the Sims and you just click buttons and then you're kind of rotating the couch around in the mall.

[Caitlin Riley]

I love the Sims.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Mall tycoon.

[Caitlin Riley]

I love this.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Of course.

[Caitlin Riley]

Wait, they should do Mal Tycoon.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think there was a mall tycoon and I saw. I think it sucked.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, okay. Did you ever do Rollercoaster Tycoon?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Who do you think you're talking to?

[Caitlin Riley]

Of course you did Sims. You were like, DJ Sims.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I did Sims and Roller Coaster Tycoon.

[Caitlin Riley]

And you had your Sims have sex a lot.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Of course.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Of course they're crawling around.

[Caitlin Riley]

Was it called Whoopi or was it called Woohoo? Woohoo. Woohoo.

[Bridger Weiniger]

There we go. Yeah. They're getting under the covers and kind of. Then they're just kind of two things kind of maneuvering around underneath the sheets.

[Caitlin Riley]

And all of a sudden you hear, ooh, usanape. Usanapecota. And it's woohoo.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then how does the baby arrive? Does a stork bring it?

[Caitlin Riley]

I Think that I.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You open the toilet and there it is.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't think the SIM was pregnant for him. I think the SIM is pregnant now. Now it's like, very intricate.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. They're really getting into the realistic aspect. And I've kind of had to distance myself.

[Caitlin Riley]

I know it's a little stressful. I'm trying to build my house. Exactly. But it's like, really, like, you need to be an architect.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Absolutely.

[Caitlin Riley]

Like, you need to do math and I don't know what's going on.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And they don't have your wallpaper.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So forget it.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't have any wallpaper.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You don't have no wallpaper.

[Caitlin Riley]

I need to renovate parts of my house.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. Is wallpaper on its way out?

[Caitlin Riley]

No, I think that a powder room slash guest bath should be wallpapered.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think we're probably at peak wallpaper, though. Right? Don't you feel like we're, like, headed back towards no wallpaper?

[Caitlin Riley]

No, because I hate what millennials have done to interior design. I think it's the worst thing we've done to society.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, hate it or not, trends come and go.

[Caitlin Riley]

But I do think wallpaper stays.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You think?

[Caitlin Riley]

I do.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But there was. Don't you remember the period when people thought, get rid of wallpaper, get rid of carpet. And we're kind of still away from carpet.

[Caitlin Riley]

I. Okay, so I ripped up the carpet in my house because it was. I mean, you can't do carpet. But I will say I do kind of love a carpeted bedroom.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, it feels amazing on your feet.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But it's just. How do you get one that looks good?

[Caitlin Riley]

You need to go flashy. You need to get like a dark, fun color. Like, you need to make it a vibe.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. You're not. You can't do an eyepatch situation. You want it to shine rather than run away from it.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes. Bedazzled eyepatch. Not flesh colored.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. A beige carpet is like.

[Caitlin Riley]

You can't do a beige carpet.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But then I'm. I can't. I cannot picture a good looking carpet.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, you can. Yeah, you can go to go on nordicnots.com nordic knots. Yeah, they have really. I just. Well, I just bought a rug from Nordic Knots because I was freaking out about the rug I was gonna buy. I ended up buying another rug. So now I have a Nordic Knots rug coming, but it's bright royal blue.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, that sounds nice. Now a rug. That's nice.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

A rug I can do with. But a full carpet. What about A fully carpeted mall.

[Caitlin Riley]

I hate that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This could save falls.

[Caitlin Riley]

It feels like a back room. Do you know, like, backrooms, little.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, yeah, of course. A mall where every floor is carpeted.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, that's.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Imagine the sound in there. It would be so damp.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, God. That's how I feel about, like, huge hotels that have the big conference floors.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, yeah. That scares me.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't like that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah, because you can't really hear your feet hit the floor.

[Caitlin Riley]

You can't hear anything.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You vanish.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, you vanish. That's where you go to vanish.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Wow. I'm sure no one's been brave enough to try that yet with a fully carpeted mall.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think that it wouldn't go well because I think that. I think that people are disgusting.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Shoes off shoes.

[Caitlin Riley]

A shoes off mall.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Shoes off mall.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yikes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Look, you say that now.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't want to see anyone's feet ever.

[Bridger Weiniger]

How do you feel about your own feet?

[Caitlin Riley]

My feet are really cute, but I don't like. I want everyone's feet away from me.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. So the shoes off mall is probably not for you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Do you wear flip flops?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, good.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I guess if I were like on a vacation that was going to be almost exclusively beach, I would probably have Crocs.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Or I guess I would put on flip flops, but then I just don't have any other use for them in my life.

[Caitlin Riley]

What's like your daily shoe?

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's this. It's a kind of.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, God. It's a van. Is that a van?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah, it's a van in kind of a marshmallow beige color.

[Caitlin Riley]

I like that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I've bought several pairs that are now I have a new pair in the closet. Just waiting until these ones die. And then I have worse pairs than this for other occasions.

[Caitlin Riley]

And they're all the same color.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's the only one that I'm like, I like how this looks.

[Caitlin Riley]

And what's the original color? White. White.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, it's this color. So it's kind of an off white so it's not immediately dirty. I see. Like, you can build up the level of dirt on this. This is probably a month old shoe at this point.

[Caitlin Riley]

That is. That's like a cool guy shoe.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is a cool guy shoe. And you are talking to a cool guy.

[Caitlin Riley]

You are cool.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Thank you. Thank you.

[Caitlin Riley]

You are like cool guy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm cool guy.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm the cool guy. And this is a podcast for guys.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. In the manosphere.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Specifically cool guys. In the manosphere.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

So this is essentially the only shoe I'll wear at this point.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What would you wear? I mean, if you were at the beach?

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, okay, so like a flip flop.

[Bridger Weiniger]

A flip flop. But not in any other.

[Caitlin Riley]

My feet are the only feet that are okay with me.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm wearing Birkenstocks right now, so my toes are out.

[Bridger Weiniger]

They're out. They're out and barking. So would you wear a flip flop anywhere else in life?

[Caitlin Riley]

No.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What about to, like, a pedicure?

[Caitlin Riley]

No, I'd wear Birkenstocks. Okay, Be reasonable.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is my problem. I need to think this through. When I go to get a pedicure, I always wear socks and shoes. And then after.

[Caitlin Riley]

Why?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't know.

[Caitlin Riley]

But do you forget?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I just. I don't do it often enough. I'm not part of that world enough to, like, know what I would. Which, like, should I wear a croc or something?

[Caitlin Riley]

Wear a croc.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Because afterwards your foot is dried, but it's still damp enough to. That you're, like, pulling on the sock in a weird way.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. I think sometimes your feet need to breathe, so you wear, like, an enclosed sandal.

[Bridger Weiniger]

An enclosed sandal Or a slide. I don't like how a slide looks.

[Caitlin Riley]

I know, everybody. A slide looks like I've got four rooms, right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I don't know where I should turn. And I don't want to drive around in a flip flop or be seen wearing jeans and flip flops. But I'm sure that's going to come back.

[Caitlin Riley]

Jeans and flip flops are really, really gross to me. I really don't like that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm sure it's on its way back. Just brace yourself.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, I don't like it at all.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Six years from now, you're gonna be tooling around the mall in a pair of, you know, bootcut jeans and flip flops.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think that men wearing jeans and flip flops is like, I don't want any man wearing a flip flop. I'm so sorry. I'm so, so sorry.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's a bad shirt.

[Caitlin Riley]

I really. It's really. It's mostly straight men.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't know if you've ever looked at a straight man's foot.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I've looked at my feet, and as a gay man, I don't agree with my feet.

[Caitlin Riley]

I mean, I'm sure your feet are more beautiful than you think. You're really beautiful. I don't want to comment on anything being ugly, but I do think I'm allowed to say this about straight men and I think that they need to put their feet away.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Keep them away.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, like you're not allowed. How about you're not allowed to do that?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's not something you should ever do.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But I don't want you giving gay men permission to wear flip flops either.

[Caitlin Riley]

Well, I think gay men can do whatever they want.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Want. See, now, this is where I disagree.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm an ally. It's my job to give gay men permission. Boys, listen to me. Do whatever the you want. Mama's here. That's what I say.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm the first gay person you've ever talked to. Okay, well, I think we should probably play a game. Do we have anything left to say about Tarot? No. I'm gonna pull one more card.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And you're gonna pull one more card. I feel like we should see. And these are just for us.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. What's yours?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Mine is the eight of roses.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. And mine is the seven of roses.

[Bridger Weiniger]

What does that mean? Other than we're bad at shuffling?

[Caitlin Riley]

Other than we're bad at shuffling. Wait, what's this one? The king of shells.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. The king of shells. And it's two people in a gross embrace. That's probably one of the grossest embraces you could do.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, really? Would you agree? I actually really love this kind of embrace. You don't like this one?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, how would you describe that as an embrace? That is so gross to me.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's, you know, you're twisty to Ing to each other.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You're looking.

[Caitlin Riley]

You're crisscross applesauce to each other.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Your legs are wrapped around each other.

[Caitlin Riley]

I like that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And you're so close.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think that's cozy.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's wet.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's wet. What do you think they're doing?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I look at that and I'm like, there's a dampness. There's a strange element to the way people were sitting. That's not for me.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, what do you like? What do you like?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Bottom of foot to bottom of foot.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Legs completely straight.

[Caitlin Riley]

And so, you know, I don't like that. I do like this. This is cozy, too.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You like that?

[Caitlin Riley]

I do.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, listener.

[Caitlin Riley]

I like to talk to people like this. I call this the Drew Barrymore.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That is a total Drew Barrymore.

[Caitlin Riley]

This is the Drew Barrymore for sure. So this is our clarification card. But wait, so you picked the six of roses?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I picked the eight of roses.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, give me the book.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Let me try and find it. Okay. Jesus Christ.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Drew Barrymore.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's the Drew Barrymore Wait, where are all. Why is this so hard to.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think it's kind of part of the, you know, spiritual element of this.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, my God.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Different cards move from page to page. It's never the same.

[Caitlin Riley]

You got the eight of roses.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You said, I got the eight of Roses.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay. Eight of roses. A regular and reliable arrangement or resource. Sometimes we just want someone who can comfortably deliver.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's such a low bar.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. So basically you're like, you just want someone to take care of you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

You wouldn't be taken care of.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

Which I love that for you. And then mine is I got the seven of roses. Mine is slow down. Don't overthink a situation that simply needs to run its course. Your patience and dedication will win out. So basically, I don't really know what that is.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's kind of a critical mom card. You know, she's just kind of badgering you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, I would say.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And what about the Drew Barrymore, the King of Shells?

[Caitlin Riley]

The Jubberry. More where we got. I got. I don't know how to find the shells.

[Bridger Weiniger]

King of Shells.

[Caitlin Riley]

Where are the things?

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's impossible to find a card in that.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, okay. This is a terrible booklet.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And this is for both of us, by the way.

[Caitlin Riley]

King. This is for both of us. This is for, like, us as a unit. This is us. This is us in the book.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's how we'll be sitting.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's podcasting. Okay. King of Shells. Us gentle and experienced in lovemaking.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

The King of Shells tends to prioritize. Is pleasuring his partner like a sexual Poseidon.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh.

[Caitlin Riley]

He displays a powerful oceanic masculinity. That's so you. That's very oceanic masculinity.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Thank you.

[Caitlin Riley]

An oceanic masculinity that summons the deeps. The king tends to have a deep understanding and a magnetic gaze. Expect eye contact, a slow build, and possibly a sensuous massage at beginning and end.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then here's our beginning bookends. Yeah, Bookend massage. Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Pre and post.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay, interesting.

[Caitlin Riley]

And then the take care note is, when unbalanced, this king can pursue his emotional whims to damaging extremes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That is so damaging extremes. I'm doing that all the time. Go off camera. Go off. King of the Ocean. Wow, my heart is pounding. I'm sweating. This is the most erotic, this podcast. I mean, it will get more erotic after this episode, but this is really a start.

[Caitlin Riley]

I want it to start here and I want it to end here.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. We're going to play a game called Gift or A curse. I need a number between 1 and 10 from you.

[Caitlin Riley]

4.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. I have to do some light calculating to get our game pieces, so right now you can promote recommendations. And I don't care what you do.

[Caitlin Riley]

I am me. My name is Caitlin. I am a Virgo sun, I am a Sagittarius Rising, and I am an Aquarius moon. And so what's interesting about that is Sagittarius risings are adventurers and comedians. So that's why. And then my Aquarius moon means that I'm like a little bit of an alien. You know, I'm kind of a bit of a world thinker. And then my Virgo sun means that I have anxiety. So that's me. That's what I have going on. And I. Yeah, I am busy and I'm doing one thing, but I legitimately cannot talk about it yet. So I'm just gonna. I just gave you my big three instead. So there we go.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Everyone find Caitlin somewhere.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, you can find me on the socials. On Instagram. It's Katelyn Riley.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay.

[Caitlin Riley]

Are people on TikTok anymore?

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's a good question.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, well, I'm there on TikTok. Just. It's Caitlin. Hello, Caitlyn. Hello. And then I don't. I don't have Twitter or X because the incels found me and I deleted it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Don't be shy. Share your email.

[Caitlin Riley]

No, no, I'm. Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I want one guest at some point to just give away their email.

[Caitlin Riley]

I do have Gmail, though, and I hate it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You hate Gmail? What's the other option?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yahoo.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Can you still get a Yahoo account? Or are they all legacy accounts?

[Caitlin Riley]

Or what is the other option aside from Gmail?

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's probably some paid thing. It's probably like Apple has a thing.

[Caitlin Riley]

Me dot com. I don't do that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, I'm not paying for my email. I'm sorry. Okay, this is how we play Gift or a curse. I'm going to name three things. You'll tell me if they're a gift or a curse, and why. Then I'll tell you if you're right or wrong. Because there are correct answers you can lose. Okay, this first one is from a listener named Cameron. Gift or a curse. When two pieces of a packaged snack are morphed into one, like goldfish or pretzels, et cetera.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's a curse.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Why?

[Caitlin Riley]

Because there's a coagulation going on that I didn't pay for. Okay, so say I'm at a restaurant and I ordered the bag of Cheez its. And let's say there's a huge, just like cheese curd clump where it's just like the dusting of the Cheez it. That's a coagulation I did not pay for. And so that is a curse. I feel like you have. I would throw that chip away. That's a curse.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Correct.

[Caitlin Riley]

Thank you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It shows a lack of care.

[Caitlin Riley]

There's a lack of care. What happened at the factory? What happened at the factory?

[Bridger Weiniger]

What happened to good old hard work?

[Caitlin Riley]

Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Good old fashioned hard work.

[Caitlin Riley]

What happened to quality assurance?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. If I see those two, I'm taking it back to the store. Well, first I'm calling and I'm yelling at someone.

[Caitlin Riley]

Same.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And then I'm taking it back to the store. I'm spitting it out of my mouth. God forbid I chew it. You know, get it in time out.

[Caitlin Riley]

You go to the store, you have it in your mouth. You're talking to someone, you spit it out of your mouth. Look at this, look at this.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, I don't have my receipt.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. But an absolute curse. Anyone that disagrees is wrong. Okay. The second one is from, unfortunately, former producer Steven Ray Morris. He somehow found his way into my inbox. Gift or a curse? An unprompted wall of a text message.

[Caitlin Riley]

Oh, I love gossip. Wait, so it's a wall of texts that you are receiving from somebody. Is it good or bad? I guess that's what we're finding out. I think it's a gift.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Why?

[Caitlin Riley]

Because the other day I sent my group chat a 15 minute voice note. And I'm not kidding, you have to

[Bridger Weiniger]

send like a quiz after to see if they actually listen to it.

[Caitlin Riley]

And they do, and they did.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Fifteen minutes. Desperate for a podcast.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That was a backdoor pilot.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I'm hoping one of them says, this is enough, let's start a podcast.

[Caitlin Riley]

No, I think. I do think that it's a gift. I love it when someone needs to tell me something. I like being involved.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Correct.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is a gift. You know, it's either gonna be a ton of gossip.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Or it's going to be the start of some sort of situation in your life with a lot of drama because somebody's mad, someone has something to say,

[Caitlin Riley]

someone cares to communicate with you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's actually really romantic.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Just scrolling and scrolling through one block of text. I love it.

[Caitlin Riley]

I love it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Anytime you're horrible, regardless of what it says, your heart will be racing for a minute because you'll be thinking, oh, my God, why didn't they do this in four different texts.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. And it's reminding you, like, baby, I'm alive.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. And you picture them at their typewriter, typing away, sending that thing off to you. Oh, yeah, that's dedication to care. That's the opposite of the goldfish situation. Yeah. It's the new love letter, right? It's the new love letter.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

All right, finally. This is from a listener named Brian. Gift or a curse? Those little free library boxes that people put up in front of their house.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, so that's really performative to me, and I don't like it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Gift or a curse?

[Caitlin Riley]

It's a curse because if I walk past it, all of a sudden I have to interact. And if I don't interact, then apparently I don't like people or reading. It's a performative thing. It's a performative community thing. It's really cute. I just, like. Part of me is like, oh, great. I'm sure you have, like, homemade granola in your kitchen. I just don't. I think it's a curse. I think it's like, just get it. Get the buck from Amazon, please. Known as the time God.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Wrong. Wrong.

[Caitlin Riley]

Come on.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is a gift.

[Caitlin Riley]

Amazon's terrible. Don't do that. Go to bookstores.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, I spoke to Caitlin before. She has a kind of a partnership. She's teamed up with Amazon.

[Caitlin Riley]

Whatever, Whatever. Whatever. Mama's got a payer bell.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You needed that 50 bucks?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, these are a gift. Look, have I ever found a book in one that I wanted to read or had any interest ever in taking home with me? No.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But it's a nice little moment where you get to stop and kind of just linger in front of a stranger's home for too long, kind of looking through their things. How often do you get invited to look through strangers things?

[Caitlin Riley]

That's a really good point. I don't get invited enough. And I do love looking through strangers things.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And I'm now thinking, this is a new show. Strangers things.

[Caitlin Riley]

Stranger things.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Now, this is maybe it could be like an antique roadshow style show where they're appraising strangers things, and then we bring in a supernatural element that doesn't pay off.

[Caitlin Riley]

The appraisers are dressed up as demogorgons.

[Bridger Weiniger]

There we go. Yeah, there we go. This is coming together. Strangers things.

[Caitlin Riley]

Strangers things. I like that. This is our thing together.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is it. We found it. Sarandos, reach out.

[Caitlin Riley]

This is us pitching strangers things to Ted Sarande on his desk.

[Bridger Weiniger]

We're sitting Drew Barrymore style on his desk.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. Yes.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He's like, when are they going to kiss?

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah. We never kiss. That's the hook of the show.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That's the will they won't thing.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes. Yeah.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, you got two out of three.

[Caitlin Riley]

Are we done?

[Bridger Weiniger]

I mean, you've. I wouldn't say failed the game.

[Caitlin Riley]

I don't fail.

[Bridger Weiniger]

No, you've never failed.

[Caitlin Riley]

Not according to my seven of roses in my chariot. Please.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I think we should answer a listener question.

[Caitlin Riley]

Fantastic.

[Bridger Weiniger]

People are writing in to. I saidnowgiftsmail.com I'm not afraid to give my email away. That's my personal email. I just said nogiftsmail.com.

[Caitlin Riley]

great.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And they're begging for answers. Will you help me answer one of these?

[Caitlin Riley]

Of course.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It says, dear Bridger and Guest, I have been invited to the housewarming of two newly married friends. The invite states, and I quote, your presence is gift enough. Which is quickly followed by, if you insist on bringing something, please consider a no Skips vinyl album that would remind us of your. You, this person. I mean, don't go. Oh, God, don't go.

[Caitlin Riley]

Wait, wait. So what's the question?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Okay. I mean, I just had to kind of. I'm collecting myself, you know, that kind of shattered me. It seems conflicting to say no gifts, but then be asked to bring something. Maybe your guests can relate. Okay, my question is, what no Skips album should I bring? Do I bring an album that I consider no Skips, but no, they will not enjoy? For example, Blink 182's enema of the State? Or do I select an album that is more in their wheelhouse and likely to be listened to by them down the line? For example, Lady Gaga's Born this Way. Any advice you have will be appreciated. That's from Colin in Portland.

[Caitlin Riley]

Okay, so I hate this couple.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This couple is such a drag.

[Caitlin Riley]

That is so obnoxious. Because do you know what work one needs to go through to, like, get in their car, find the record store? Cause there's record stores on every block in every city.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I smell another Amazon promo coming from you.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, AM Yeah. So then you have to sift through and find, like, buy us a record. But not just any record.

[Bridger Weiniger]

A perfect album. Which, by the way, is subjective. So it's a little. So like, now we're putting in this weird critical element where you bring something and we might just think you're stupid or you have bad taste. People have all sorts of different types of no Skip albums.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'm getting them. Fred Durst, his solo album yeah, what is it? Start Butt Kiss. Start. Start Butt. What is it called? What's that album, Ellis? What's that album called? Star.

[Bridger Weiniger]

It's Hot Dog Flavored Water.

[Caitlin Riley]

Hot Dog Flavored Water and the Star. But what is it? There's a second part to it.

[Bridger Weiniger]

This is the Limp Bizkit album.

[Caitlin Riley]

Chocolate, Starfish and the Hot Dog Flavored Water. And that's.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Can you imagine?

[Caitlin Riley]

Maybe we should let AI think, okay, who's Fred Durst?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Fred Durst is the.

[Caitlin Riley]

Is Limp Bizkit.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He is the vocalist. Let's call him a singer. He's a singer. He's the singer.

[Caitlin Riley]

He's a singer. He's a musician.

[Bridger Weiniger]

He's a vocalist.

[Caitlin Riley]

Wait, so I just said the vocalist of Limp Bizkit. Not just Limp. I'm. I, I.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, you should have said powerhouse vocalist.

[Caitlin Riley]

Powerhouse vocalist. Limp Bizkit, Starfish Water and the Hot Dog. Starkist. What is it again?

[Bridger Weiniger]

Ultimately, what you're trying to say is that's a no Skips album.

[Caitlin Riley]

That's a no Skips album. So that's the album that I would bring as a you to this couple. Or I. Or I'd bring an organic orange wine with, like a lot of sediment in it, which I did the other day. I did the other day. And the house host was like, oh, wow, there's a lot of stuff in it, huh? I was like, yeah, yeah, there is.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Hot dog flavored water.

[Caitlin Riley]

Hot dog flavored water. And the Star Butt Kiss.

[Bridger Weiniger]

That feels like a wine spinoff for Limp Bizkit. They should start a wine business. They should kind of spin off of that album. That would revive sales, I think. So I bet they're looking for that nice resurgence. I feel like. Colin, take the Limp Bizkit album.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, take a look at that.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Which I'm sure is on vinyl. That feels very vinyl ready for me.

[Caitlin Riley]

It's a very vinyl ready album.

[Bridger Weiniger]

There's a warmth to that album.

[Caitlin Riley]

There is, yeah. I wanna, I wanna really. I wanna feel like I'm in the studio, kind of surrounded by the sound of it all. I wanna be inside the Biscuit.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yes. Or take nothing. Because they did say, don't bring anything. When somebody says, don't bring anything. And then the second thing is extremely annoying if I even show up.

[Caitlin Riley]

Right. But also, like, so then, so then if you say it's such a specific gift. So if you say don't bring anything, but if you're gonna bring someone something, please bring a vinyl album that, that perfectly reflects you as a human being. So then they're going to. So. So here's the thing. They're leading the witness, right? So this couple is like, that's gonna make everyone wanna bring an album. Cause what a fun little game. Totally.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right?

[Caitlin Riley]

So every single person's gonna come in the house and be like, okay, this is the vinyl album I brought. And then the couple's gonna be like, oh, my God, of course. Yes. It's gonna be this really cute back and forth, and then there's gonna be that one person that doesn't bring in a vinyl album, and it's going to be a disappointment.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right?

[Caitlin Riley]

So I would say my answer is don't go.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah, I think absolutely don't go. Cut them out.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, cut them out of your life.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Get rid of these people.

[Caitlin Riley]

Cut them out of your life. Because they sound very toxic.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Can you imagine going to and being the only person that brings vinyl?

[Caitlin Riley]

And I would do it. Oh, I thought you meant the only person that doesn't bring vinyl.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Either way, it's horrible. But imagine showing up and you're the only person who did that. The horror. The spine. Chill.

[Caitlin Riley]

And how obnoxious.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I would have to leave. I would put it on a table

[Caitlin Riley]

and just walk out, and the couple would make. It would be the whole. It would be the sort of centerpiece of the evening.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right. Of course. Of them making fun of you.

[Caitlin Riley]

No. Of them being like, ugh.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Oh, no.

[Caitlin Riley]

You just have to keep talking about it. Bridger, I can't believe you actually bought an alf. Oh, my. Oh, my God. Oh, Bridger, wait. Okay, hold on. Wait. Bridger, come here. Wait. Hold on. Bridger. Okay. Why this? Bridger, why this album, then?

[Bridger Weiniger]

They put it on in front of everyone.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yes. So they're gonna make a whole spectacle of it, because that is inherently what they want.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Right.

[Caitlin Riley]

So they're gonna just hook into you the whole night.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Personal. Hell, yeah.

[Caitlin Riley]

Personal.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Well, we answered the question perfectly.

[Caitlin Riley]

I think we did.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You didn't win the game. That's fine.

[Caitlin Riley]

I didn't win the game. I was kind of an annoying guest. I was late. I think I talked over you a little bit. I feel like I'm kind of loud and repetitive.

[Bridger Weiniger]

You've been a real d. I've been a real.

[Caitlin Riley]

Yeah, and I'm sorry, unfortunately.

[Bridger Weiniger]

But that's okay. That's why we're able to delete audio. Thank God, right? I mean, this will. We'll save this as, like, once the podcast is fully over, we'll be like. And one special treat. This one. Don't get your hopes up. The episode sucks. Yeah, but you can listen to it. Cause you need more. Yeah, that'll be in a few years, but that's fine.

[Caitlin Riley]

Fantastic.

[Bridger Weiniger]

And you'll be famous by then.

[Caitlin Riley]

Fame, fame, it's in my cards.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Yeah. You'll be on Floats Galore.

[Caitlin Riley]

I'll be on Floats Galore.

[Bridger Weiniger]

I've had such a lovely time with you.

[Caitlin Riley]

I've had such a lovely time with you.

[Bridger Weiniger]

Thank you for being here.

[Caitlin Riley]

Thank you for being here, listener.

[Bridger Weiniger]

The podcast is over. It's just over. I'm asking everyone to stop listening. Stop, get over it, move on. I love you, Goodbye. I said no Gifts is an exactly right production. Our senior producer is Ellis Nelson and our episodes are beautifully mixed by Ben Tolliday. The theme song is by miracle worker Amy Mann. And we couldn't do it without our booker, Patrick Cotner. You must follow the show on Instagram. Instagram at. I said no Gifts. That's where you're going to see pictures of all these wonderful gifts I'm getting. And don't you want to see the gifts?

[Caitlin Riley]

When I invited you here, thought I made myself perfectly clear. When you're a guest in my home, you got to come to me empty handed. I said that no guil. Your presence is presence enough. And I already had too much stuff. So how do you dare disobey me? At cvs, it matters that we're not just in your community, but that we're part of it. It matters that we're here for you when you need us, day or night. And we want everyone to feel welcomed and rewarded. It matters that CVS is here to fill your prescriptions and here to fill your craving for a tasty and, yeah, healthy snack. At cvs, we're proud to serve your community because we believe where you get your medicine matters. So Visit [e-mail] or just come by our store. We can't wait to meet you. Store hours vary by location.

[Bowen Yang]

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[Caitlin Riley]

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[Caitlin Riley]

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[Sophia Bush]

This is Sophia Bush from Work in Progress with Sophia Bush. Bring the good with Avocados from Mexico Upgrade your meals, your get togethers, even your everyday life. Give your moments a little glow up. Be the one everyone's glad showed up because avocados from Mexico spark the joy with every bite. And by the way, they're good for you too. So elevate your everyday. Bring the good flavor so rich and craveable.

[Caitlin Riley]

Avocados from Mexico Always good.