
Hosted by Isabel Knight & Deondre' Jones · EN

If you haven't heard of the podcast Code Switch, it is an NPR podcast that talks about race in America, and a person that Deondre' dated texted him to let him know that she called into the show to ask a question about their relationship. Immediately Deondre's interest was piqued, and it turns out that she went onto the show to ask about "race and dating preferences." The episode of that podcast has since come out, so we can tell you exactly what she asked:"I've been casually seeing a guy for a few months now. For reference, I'm white, he's Black, and we're polyamorous. I've briefly met his other partners and they are both also white women. This struck me as a little odd since we both live in a major city that is multiracial. I've met some of his friends and that group is diverse.I'm currently at a point in my life where I want to make sure I am actually living my values, including challenging my whiteness and that comes with that. I want to ask him about it, but I also don't want to seem like I am questioning his racial identity or trying to minimize his life or choices as a black man. I also don't know his entire dating history, so maybe he just has a type as of late? Any advice on navigating this conversation?"In this episode, Deondre' talks about how this whole encounter made him feel, and the answer is: not great. We talk about whether or not questions like this get asked of white people as much as they get asked of people of color, as well as the baggage of the still-prevailing assumption that people ought to date within their race: despite the fact that it is 2025, we are still in a society where cross-racial dating is still not considered an unquestionable norm, and a number of commentators have openly wondered whether the Supreme Court might reconsider Loving vs. Virginia, the unanimously-decided 1967 Supreme Court case that struck down the State of Virginia's anti-miscegenation law that prohibited interracial marriages.Links:Code Switch Episode Featuring Deondre': Ask Code Switch: Is it a preference or a fetish?

If you share our politics you might be a nervous wreck right now, but one thing that both Deondre and Isabel like to do for our physical and mental health is go rock climbing. So we have on a super fascinating guest, David Liu, who works at a popular rock gym chain called Movement. He talks to us about how rock climbing has ballooned massively in popularity, and is now an Olympic sport. But the thing is, when rock climbing was introduced to the Olympics in 2020, they combined a number of different types of rock climbing that are pretty different from each other (bouldering, lead climbing, and speed climbing). We talk through why these different types of climbing require really different skills, and so in 2024, the International Olympic Committee actually did split the rock climbing event into 2 separate events: speed climbing and bouldering and lead. And while this is definitely better, anyone who has done bouldering and lead climbing will tell you that these are still quite different from each other.We also talk about other aspects of climbing, like the difference between outdoor climbing and indoor climbing (the hardest climb in the world is called The Burden of Dreams in Finland, which is level V17; apparently people have been making 3D-printed replicas of this climb to try to practice on it) and whether or not we should be trying to preserve outdoor climbs as much as possible (sometimes people will try to chip away at outdoor climbs to make it more traversable).And what makes something satisfying to climb? There are some obvious metrics, like not being too hard or too easy for your particular level, but there are also equally difficult climbs that can still be more or less satisfying to climb than others. In this way, setting a climb is sort of like music in that it is often really difficult to understand or articulate why we like certain climbs and not others, which can feel almost spiritual. David has clearly thought a lot about the philosophy, mechanics, and power dynamics of rock climbing, and this conversation is a fascinating reflection of that.Links:Burden of Dreams Climb: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Burden_of_Dreams_(climb)#:~:text=Burden%20of%20Dreams%20is%20a,climbing%20film%2C%20The%20Lappnor%20Project.Climbing at the 2024 Olympics: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sport_climbing_at_the_2024_Summer_OlympicsDavid's Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/r2dliu/?hl=en

We do a little processing of what the hell happened with the election, including where we think the Democrats fucked up, and where we go from here. We are joined by our very important, insightful, and charismatic friend Ronald Young Jr, of Oh Its Big Ron Studios. It's his 4th time appearing on this show, we ran the receipts. Our assessment basically boils down to this: the Democrats did not find a way to speak to working people, using language that appeals to elites but is not accessible to working people, despite championing wildly popular policies. But of course, they are, as Ronald would say, showing up to a boxing match where sure, maybe they could have trained harder, but the Republicans just straight up have razor blades in their gloves. We need to figure out whether we are going to literally die on the hill with the moral high ground, or whether eventually the Democrats will also have to start changing the rule book like the Republicans have been doing all along. Deondre' thinks we can win straight up, but only if Democrats take the opportunity of being in the minority party to openly criticize the wildly unpopular genocide in Gaza, and figure out how to actually build a coalition. Aside from dunking on the Democrats, we talk about the importance of podcasts in this election, given that Trump not only went on Joe Rogan, but 13 other podcasts, which resulted in 124 million views on YouTube, compared to the 5 podcasts Kamala went on which only got about 4 million views. (Source: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZOJI9Rw-EZ0&ab_channel=ColinandSamir) Deondre' is starting a new trend called #RippedforTrump, which basically entails going to the gym because there are about to be a lot of things outside of our control in the coming months, but one thing you can always control is your body. Isabel had a (mildly flirtatious?) run-in with a Trump canvasser which resulted in her lamenting the fact that we tend to be the party of wusses, which gives even more reason for us all to go to the gym. Links:Ronald's shows:Weight For It: https://www.radiotopia.fm/podcasts/weight-for-itLeaving the Theater: https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/leaving-the-theater/id1481268414Pop Culture Debate Club: https://lemonadamedia.com/show/pop-culture-debate-club-with-ronald-young-jr/

Reflecting on the previous episode, where Deondre' tells us about his experience of jury duty back in February, we talk about what we think the ideal system should be given that Deondre' has now had this experience. Isabel also had a friend of a friend go through a high-profile trial recently, and we grapple with what it really means to be a prison abolitionist, and the many contradictions that come with it. For example, despite identifying as a prison abolitionist, Deondre' also admits that if the defendant had committed first degree murder beyond a reasonable doubt, we should separate the people who commit these kinds of violent crimes from the rest of society. So no matter where we put these people, even if we were to improve the conditions of the place where we put them, like by providing air conditioning and humane living conditions, does that separation still constitute a prison?

Prepare yourselves for a Cuckoo Bananas episode because Deondre' got called for jury duty and not only was Deondre' worried that he was going to be the alternate juror and not get to weigh in on the case at all, he actually got to be the foreman, which is the person who reads the verdict. This was an emotional job because the case was a murder case. We talk about the details of the case, and in the next episode we will continue our conversation by reflecting on what it means to be a prison abolitionist through the lens of processing this recent experience.Note: This podcast was recorded in February 2024 so we are still playing catchup a little bit. But the content is evergreen!

Ya bois get down on some modern political commentary, albeit many months out of date (this podcast was originally recorded in November 2023) but a good lookback on our initial reactions to the crazy bullshit happening on the world stage happening now. Ezra Klein came out with take when all of this was going down in October, saying the thing that makes this situation feel like we are all being constantly gaslit is that the modern media environment "makes scandalous the presentation of context," meaning there is no way to have conversations about this issue with nuance. This really captures how we feel about the issue. It's wild that world leaders are trying to figure out the most "humane" way to kill people. Politicians will bend over backwards to make it seem like shooting a Palestinian child is the right thing to do. Ceasefire now. Links:John Green's Crash Course on Conflict in Israel and Palestine through 2015: https://youtu.be/1wo2TLlMhiw?si=mHVM_L2jsmVygrSh Doctors without Borders: https://www.doctorswithoutborders.org/World Central Kitchen: https://wck.org/Baitulmaal: https://baitulmaal.org/UNICEF: https://www.unicef.org/emergencies/children-gaza-need-lifesaving-supportSave the Children: https://www.savethechildren.org/us/where-we-work/west-bank-gaza

Friends we are BACK ON OUR BULLSHIT. This episode is long overdue because Deondre' got married back in October and we recorded it back in November and now it is June. But fear not, we still have evergreen content for you all in the form of being messy and talking about our ex's, talking about the vision that we have for our romantic lives and what happens when straight boys read bell hooks. There has been a lot of evolution in Deondre's life in particular; when I (Isabel) first met him, I thought there was no way he was ever going to get married, not because he isn't an eligible bachelor but because he didn't feel very bought into marraige as an institution. I thought we were doing to be ride or die sluts. But now all that has changed: Deondre' is vying for that white picket fence dream. We'll see if he gets it.Music is The Beauty of Maths by Meydän. Links:Deondre's Wedding Vendors: Moontide Sundries: https://moontidesundries.com/Photos from the Harty: https://www.photosfromtheharty.com/Mimosa Barn: https://www.facebook.com/MimosaBarn/Aven: https://www.instagram.com/aven/?hl=en

It has been an actually ridiculous amount of time since we last posted an episode, but we are back! And we are back with another installment of Millennials Lust After Their College Walkable Community! We recorded this episode back in October 2023 about a camp what Mike Wheeler and Stephanie Logan put together called Camp Logwheel that Isabel attended in Septemer, and now that are already planning their next one for May, in a few short months. We talk to Mike and Stephanie about what their community-building goals were for this camp, and the main thesis is that, if you think you are the only one who wants to build community, you're NOT. You may be more or less willing than some of your friends to sacrifice and invest in the community but you're certainly surrounded by people who are lusting for more community. Stephanie tells us about her community growing up: her parents went to church, and though she wasn't fond of sitting in a pew listening to sermons, she did love being part of a community. Mike was an RA (Residential Assistant) in college and he would leave his door open all the time, sometimes to come back from class and find his residents in his room playing on his GameCube, which he loved! So now we are in or almost in our 30's and we are trying to figure out how to make these kinds of communities happen for us again, or at least get as close an approximation of it as we can. Mike knows friends whose parents moved away from their college friends in their 20s, only to decide to ask all of their friends to move in close to them, and they actually did! So maybe, even though it can seem so unlikely in a world where social ties are simply growing weaker and the loneliness crisis is accelerating, our dreams of multigenerational communities who gather regularly for potlucks and take care of each other's children is actually achievable: maybe all we need to do is ask. Music is The Beauty of Maths by Meydän.

This is a continuation of the previous episode from last week, and in this part of the conversation we UNPACK some SHIT. We talk about what happens when you are happily in an undefined relationship, and then eventually society comes along and peers in the window and asks you WHAT YOU ARE. This has been a particular frustration for Isabel recently, and so a lot of this episode is shooting the shit about our relationships and what is important about them to us. We also continue talking about the importance of the middle tier friend, which is a friend who is not your best or closest friend, but someone who is just a solid friend that you can talk with regularly and there's never any drama because the stakes aren't too high with middle tier friends. Music is The Beauty of Maths by Meydän.

In this episode we talk about what we personally value when meeting another human being, and if there are particular factors that we find particularly revealing when it comes to a new person's personality, whether it be a potential lover or a new friend. Deondre' is all vibes. Can they talk about something interesting at length, do they laugh? Isabel really things birth order effects (whether you are the first child if you have siblings, or whether you are an only child) can be a really big part of determining one's personality as well. We also talk a lot about relationships and how the social dynamics are changing such that women really stand to lose to much more when entering into cishetero relationships because single women are the happiest women in America, and single men are much less happy compared to their partnered counterparts. Music is The Beauty of Maths by Meydän.